Gay anal sex advice


This is the first installment in a series intended to educate gay and bisexual men on love, sex, and safety. 

There is a glaring absence of comprehensive sex education in the United States. And when it comes to men and women who are same-sex inclined, the curriculum is nonexistent. As our society becomes more and more conducive for youth to feel comfortable with their sexuality, there has never been more of a need for gay sex ed than for today’s queer generation. In fact, HIV diagnoses among gay and bisexual men, ages 13-24, are up by 132.5 percent since the beginning of the century. Recent studies have also found that teens who get comprehensive sex education make better choices about sex. 

So get out your pens and crack those notebooks — it’s time to take some notes.

When it comes to anal sex, there are three main topics that you should study: Cleanliness, Comfort, and Consent.

Cleanliness — Anal sex can be great, but the last thing you want to ruin your sexy moment is an unappealing smell. Sometimes, all you need is a good push and some sani-wipes to be sex-ready. Other times — depending on your diet or your digestive system — you may need to douche. Douching, however, can damage the mucous membrane of the anal wall, so be careful.

Comfort — Lube is one of the most important components to a healthy gay man’s sex life. Lube not only makes anal sex feel better, but it can also reduce your risk of tearing the anal wall. Lube makes for cleaner, safer, and more pleasurable sex for both partners. So when in doubt, always opt for more lube. There are general two types of lube to choose from.

Water-based lube: This type of lube is easy to clean and safe to use with toys as well as during anal sex. This kind of lube rinses off with just water and is 100 percent latex condom–compatible. However, this lube is not as long-lasting as silicone because it absorbs into the body and it is not waterproof.

Silicone-based lube: This type of lube is smooth, long-lasting, and less likely to feel sticky or tacky during use. Since this lube doesn’t absorb into the body, a little goes a long way, and it works in the shower, bathtub, pool, or hot tub. Silicone-based lube, however, is not as easy as water-based to clean off. It requires soap and water to remove. It is also not compatible with silicone-based sex toys.

Consent — Consent is hardly ever discussed when it comes to gay sex, but it is an integral part of being a healthy gay man. The duality of men being men and same-sex intimacy far too often can blur the lines of sexual abuse. You have the right to say no. Your partner has the right to say no. If you or your partner is too inebriated for one reason or another, not being able to say no is not a yes. Do not compromise your emotional and sexual health by being pressured into doing things you aren’t comfortable with just because you are too afraid to speak up. Use the power of consent and make sure your sexual partners feel comfortable with using theirs.

HIV isn’t just a gay issue, but the importance of HIV is entrenched in gay history, gay culture, and gay sex. Although HIV is very much a manageable disease today, it can still cause mental, emotional, and physical trauma without the proper information and support. And with HIV infection on the rise among young gay and bisexual men, it is imperative to arm yourself with the right information in order to stay safe and enjoy your sex life without fear.

Transmission — HIV is transmitted through certain body fluids – blood, semen, pre-seminal fluid (pre-cum), rectal fluids, vaginal fluids, and breast milk. HIV does not live in saliva. The highest-risk sexual behavior among gay men is anal sex, with receptive anal sex (bottoming) riskier than insertive anal sex (topping). Anal sex, especially sex without lube, can cause damaged tissue in the anal mucous membrane, or the lining of the anal wall. When HIV-infected seminal fluid or pre-seminal fluid comes into contact with the damaged tissue, transmission occurs. It is far less likely for transmission to occur from oral sex, but it is not impossible. If a person has open sores on the inside of their mouth and their HIV-positive sexual partner ejaculates in their mouth, transmission can happen. However, most types of oral sex carry little to no risk.

Protection — If you have any fear regarding HIV, you can relax. The good news is you are free to enjoy sex without ever having to worry about being diagnosed with HIV as long as you choose a protection method that works for you.

Condoms: The gold standard of safe sex. Condoms are highly effective at preventing HIV transmission when used correctly. Condoms are a simple and easy protection method that will keep you and your partner safe.

PrEP: Pre-exposure prophylaxis (PrEP), the daily dose of an anti-HIV medication, is 99 percent effective at preventing HIV transmission when used correctly. Truvada is the only drug approved so far for use in prevention. According to recent reports, the vast majority of gay men do not wear condoms 100 percent of the time. PrEP is an excellent tool to keep you safe if you and your partner do not wear a condom for whatever reason. Although PrEP does not prevent against other STDs, a prescription for PrEP does require regular doctor’s visits, which include routine lab work, so it allows for the user to take control of their sex life and stay engaged in their sexual health.

PEP: This prevention method, known as post-exposure prophylaxis, is meant for use only when someone believes that they have been exposed to HIV with risk of transmission. This is not an active prevention strategy, but a reactive precaution that is available to you if you need it.

TasP: Treatment as prevention, known as TasP, is when an HIV-positive person is on antiretroviral treatment and achieves an undetectable viral load. When a person reaches an undetectable status, they reduce their risk of transmission by 96 percent. To date, there have been zero confirmed cases of HIV transmission by an undetectable person.

Disclosure — The single most important subject to master when it comes to your sexual health is disclosure. Everyone has an HIV status, and an HIV-negative person has just as much of a responsibility to disclose his or her status as an HIV-positive person. Always inquire about your partner’s HIV status, but never assume that he or she is HIV-negative or undetectable just because they say so. People who are unaware of their HIV-positive status or have yet to begin treatment account for 91 percent of new HIV infections in the U.S. Unless they have just been tested and have not been with anyone since, you cannot be sure just by taking their word. By disclosing, however, you open the conversation about HIV and STDs between you and your partner. These conversations are vital to establishing trust and fostering healthy communication with your sexual partner.

Testing — There are more than just two HIV statuses. There is HIV-negative, HIV-positive, HIV-positive and undetectable, and HIV-unaware. If you have had even one unprotected sexual encounter since your last HIV test, then you are HIV-unaware. And the same goes for your partner. By getting tested regularly and using the prevention method that works for you, you can always be sure what your HIV-status is. For a list of free testing locations in your area, visit here.

Worry-Free Sex — When you disclose your own status and take precautions to protect yourself from transmission, your sex life will be amazing because you have the knowledge that you are protected, no matter what. With this information, you can have sex with, date, or even marry the person who’s right for you, regardless of his or her status.

How to bottom without douching?

Does anyone bottom without douching, if so how do you do it?

Is it good or bad to poop right before anal (if you’re not going to douche)?

When I poop I always feel like I’m actually forcing the poop into my rectum, whereas it might have been at a "safe distance" for anal. Then I also always feel like not all the poop came out, so maybe there’s some stuck directly inside my rectum. But I don’t know if the latter is true. That’s just a feeling I guess.

Maybe someone can clarify. I bottomed three times without any preparation and it was "clean" (i.e. no smell and no poop stains or particles), but maybe I was just lucky. Not sure. I’m really self-conscious about this and would like to bottom more frequently and more comfortably, so maybe someone can enlighten the situation. 🙂

You’re a guy putting your dick in another guys butt. There might be poo, it’s part of the deal imo.

Wearing a condom makes it easy if there is any poo.

Edit: we don’t douche and there’s rarely poo. We’re both vegetarian though, might have something to do with it?

Gross as it is in dire curcumstances my tools of the trade are the following:

It ain’t pretty but it works like a charm, I’d never bottom without ensuring I’m 100% clean.

I know plenty of people here say with anal sex you can’t always go into it expecting the bottom to always be squeaky clean down there given the fact that it’s an ass hole after all but personally I do, so I extend that expectation onto myself given the circumstances.

are you putting hand sanitiser up you ass? i don’t think that’s safe? doesn’t it sting?

I never douche or prepare. Most often the rectum is empty. Several times a day your colon will initiate a bowel movement. If there is sufficient feces in your rectum you’ll have to go. If there is just a little, it will usually pass and your rectum will be empty. Most often its safe. When you need to go, directly before and after usually aint safe moments for sex 😉

Never douche, it can harm you if not done correctly. Eat a fiber rich diet (read: vegetables), drink lots of water (not fluids in general, WATER), and listen to my body. If I think I am going to bottom that night, I may not eat after a certain time to make sure I have time for everything to break down so I can have a good bowel movement or two. In general, I think it’s fine to poop up to about an hour before you have anal (what works for me), making sure to take a shower and really clean back there (use only water, no soap and be gentle). As for the feeling of forcing a poop out, never do that. If it isn’t coming after a gentle push, then it isn’t quite ready. Consider getting a squatty potty? I’ve heard they help, but I don’t have one so i’m not sure.

I don’t understand the "never douche" thing. It’s great if you don’t have to, and you don’t have to do it all the time. But I think most gay men are perfectly capable of squirting a little bit of water up there for a quick clean out without harming themselves. I mean you’re about to take a dick up there, I don’t see how you’re likely to hurt yourself with a bit of water.

So if you bottom at night you would skip dinner and poop out breakfast? Didn’t realize it goes that fast.

Tbh I just have a big poop in the morning (I do eat lots of fiber, drink lots of water) then I am not able to poop again until maybe 10 PM. I would need to force it though. But in the evening it does kinda feel like if I forced it I might be able to poop, so I always worry if it’s already in my rectum. Is that a false worry?

poop a couple hours before. take a shower. there ya go.

eat a little better with some soluble fiber to make sure that poop isn’t a nasty gross slurry but is a nice solid log.

If you try to poop even though you don’t feel the urgent need, is it possible that it actually moves poop into the rectum? Or is that nonsense?

Neither me nor my BF bother with douching. It’s unnecessary.

You seem to be doing fine. Keep practicing and you’ll know your body.

Here are the results of the anal douching survey in san francisco

We don’t often talk about anal douching, but know it’s something many of us do in the privacy of our bathrooms. And since it’s connected to our sex lives and sexual health, we thought it deserved a closer look. In addition to our anal douching infographic and article about anal douching safety for gay men, we present the results of our anal douching survey. We asked—you answered. Here’s what you had to say about anal douching.

First, a few notes about the survey. We posted this anonymous questionnaire to a convenient sample of people in our networks. By no means is this survey representative of our entire community or San Francisco. Also, it’s likely that people who took the survey are people with anal douching experience or people who felt they had something to say about anal douching. (In other words, our survey results suffer from response bias.)

gay anal sex advice 4zo7jf

Bottoms who bottom multiple times per week, how do you do it?!?!

Not just "fiber and good diet". Give specific details of your routine that allow you to generally be cleaner. I know there are posts like this all the time, but I always like to hear more!! Diet choices, fiber / supplement dosages and timing, cleaning techniques, etc., share it all!!! We will love you for it.

I’m a total bottom that does it 1-4 times a week. The best advice I have received is that if you know when you are going to be fucked, stay well hydrated that day and hold your pee as long as you can. Time it out so you gotta go an hour or two before sex. The pressure of a full bladder makes you go poop and fully cleans you out. Then shower before of course. I always keep a few female condoms on hand. If I think I might be borderline clean, I use those. The top can fuck without getting a messy cock. Then after the fun, pull it out and shower. Some tops dont like them but a few of my fwb’s do.

Well, for me being able to do it a couple times a week really depends on my partner. Thankfully current bf is not squeamish at all and really put me at ease about any possible messes. He’s super low key about it, and just says he really does not care and we can go shower off together if need be. So that’s number one because it really takes the pressure off and allows me to let him have fun more than when I’m only squeaky clean. As for supplements, I’m still experimenting on what works best for me so I don’t have an answer for ya there. But generally just going number 2 beforehand and cleaning up in the shower works for me.

Well, I’ll be the black sheep in that I eat whatever the fuck I want but also drink a lot (of alcohol) and that keeps me right in between of being constipated and shitting my brains out. You’ll learn when the correct time to bottom is….eventually.

That’s odd, since isn’t most of the fiber people say is so important found in grains?

It might be because I’m vegetarian, but I’ve rarely had problems, and the only thing I change if I want to bottom is not eating cheese (it’s the only dairy I eat).

I take fiber supplements at least twice a day. I try to take a serving with every meal. It helps keep everything together. If I know I’m getting fucked that day I won’t eat much if anything at all. Usually I’ll eat some veggies or like that for lunch. What really counts is what you ate the day before (dear God stay away from corn). I have the clean stream enema system (I call it the Douchemaster 5000) and I’ve had a lot of success with it. In fact I don’t think I’ve had any kind of accident other than a little excess water coming out sometimes but that’s not a big deal (hell you’re going to be greased up with lube anyway). I use the douchemaster for 20 minutes or so and sit on the toilet for 10 minutes to make sure all the water comes out. The trick with this is to watch the water pressure as you don’t want to shoot water into your intestines and trigger a bowel movement. Sometimes I do it and get it out of the way so that way I know I’m be squeaky clean and can take a whole fist if I wanted.

Fiber and a good diet is the best thing I know of that works for me. I haven’t heard of anything else being invented yet.

I have a lot of sex with my boyfriend. We generally do it in the morning at least once, sometimes two in a row, sometimes once in the afternoon and usually before we sleep. My routine, deep douche after morning sex, I usually eat a salad with a protein for lunch, douche about two hours later and usually eat something really light for supper. I will usually have a cleanse sometime mid-evening to make sure I’m good to go for the night. It works 95% of the time for a totally clean experience.

Isn’t douching that much unhealthy? I hear messes with your gut bacteria.

Where the fuck do you work that you can douche 2 hours after lunch every day?

Don’t have much to contribute as a top but magically my partner is always clean…actually I should ask him how he does it, it’s pretty awesome. We do full intercourse a couple times a week usually, unless the booty needs a break. I don’t think he uses enemas too much, it’s mostly just good bowel movements.

This is a new one you probably never heard of. Coffee Enema, yup your anus likes coffee once and awhile. Let me explsin, Coffee Enema has been used by different cultures for so many years. Coffee when introduced inside the rectum It get absorbed directly through your hepatal viens to your liver. The liver then releases and flush itself intoe the bowel, then you will have an urgent bowel movemnt. Coffee anema has scientifically proven as a good way to clean the large intestine, regulate the movemnt and also it will filter and detoxify the liver. How to do it? You need organic coffee and distilled water. Boil 2 tbsp of ground coffee into 2 cubs of distilled water. Let it cool off till it is in body temperature. Put it in Enama bag or bucket, get it inside your bowel. Let is stay there for 10 to 15 min or untill you feel the need to empty it out. You will find that you are emptying some really wierd disgusting stuff out of your bowels. You might feel the need to unload 2 or 3 times. It is all good. Its all junk that were in your intestine for long time. You can do coffee enema 2 times a week. You will notice that your ass is healthy clean and ready for any time you want get plowed! You only do it 2 times a week and you are ready at any given day for hot dick! You can do it 3 time or 4 if you want but there is a chance of you losing electrolights and minerals if you over do it. You need 2 or 3 days break. It is very good for your health specifically if your liver has been through bad diet and alcohol, it is good to flush it and give your system a reboot with some organic coffee.

Gay guys: how to -properly- prepare for anal sex?

Frankly, I have little trouble taking stuff– but the real trouble I have is, uh, getting clean beforehand so I can even do anything. More often than not, I give myself an enema (usually like 3-5 times) and turn up perfectly clean. But then ten minutes later I suddenly have to go, and it seems like my entire intestines are trying to empty out. How the hell do I prepare so something horrible like that doesn’t happen?

Some guys like things enema-clean, but personally, I think that’s being overkill (3-5 enemas is definitely overkill). Make sure you use the bathroom before you have sex (and clean up your butthole), and you should be fine. Anal sex is not supposed to be squeaky-clean, and if your partner doesn’t want the occasional bit of shit on his dick, he should use a condom (besides the other obvious reasons for using condoms).

Also, enemas can irritate your insides and that can increase the risks of you getting HIV if you’re having unprotected sex with a guy who is (possibly unknowingly) infected.

Oh good! I’m not the only one that thought the whole enema thing was serious overkill. Still, it helps if you finger yourself a little bit first, just to loosen yourself. I’ve never found being dirty an issue, providing I don’t need to go.

Get an adequate amount of fiber every day and avoid eating sticky flour, peanut butter or syrups at least a day or two before bottoming. That alone should go a long way in ensuring that nothing sticks around in there, which never really happens with a natural diet in the first place.

Also, you can use a body-temperature saline douche about an hour before you have sex. You want to be careful with this, though; it can dry out your anus and rectum, making it more susceptible to damage during sex (hemorrhoids, fissure, increased risk of exposure to STDs if unprotected, etc). Long-term use of douches or enemas can also lead to a few problems, so you don’t want to use these EVERY time you bottom.

Make sure you use the bathroom an hour or two BEFORE sex begins. . try fingering yourself or using a toy around this time, too; if you have to go again. .’s okay. If you’re feeling self-conscious or nervous about your body at all, it’s probably not going to be a good experience. Relax and enjoy yourself.

I always hear the "use the bathroom a few hours before you have anal" advice, but I have no idea how to do that. I can’t just go on command! How do people do that?

You want to avoid anything that will encourage your digestion to move along.

Sounds like you’re squirting too much water up your arse. When you go again 10 minutes later is it really watery?

Not sure how big your enema bulb is but try only using half or 1/4 of the water. I use an ear syringe (._2JU2WQDzn5pAlpxqChbxr7{height:16px;margin-right:8px;width:16px}._3E45je-29yDjfFqFcLCXyH{margin-top:16px}._13YtS_rCnVZG1ns2xaCalg{font-family:Noto Sans,Arial,sans-serif;font-size:14px;font-weight:400;line-height:18px;display:-ms-flexbox;display:flex}._1m5fPZN4q3vKVg9SgU43u2{margin-top:12px}._17A-IdW3j1_fI_pN-8tMV-{display:inline-block;margin-bottom:8px;margin-right:5px}._5MIPBF8A9vXwwXFumpGqY{border-radius:20px;font-size:12px;font-weight:500;letter-spacing:0;line-height:16px;padding:3px 10px;text-transform:none}._5MIPBF8A9vXwwXFumpGqY:focus{outline:unset} /*#{-ms-flex-align:center;align-items:center;display:-ms-flexbox;display:flex;margin:22px 0 0;min-height:200px;overflow:hidden;position:relative}._2KLA5wMaJBHg0K2z1q0ci_{margin:0 -7px -8px}._1zdLtEEpuWI_Pnujn1lMF2{bottom:0;position:absolute;right:52px}._3s18OZ_KPHs2Ei416c7Q1l{margin:0 0 22px;position:relative}.LJjFa8EhquYX8xsTnb9n-{filter:grayscale(40%);position:absolute;top:11px}._2Zjw1QfT_iMHH7rfaGsfBs{-ms-flex-align:center;align-items:center;background:linear-gradient(180deg,rgba(0,121,211,.24),rgba(0,121,211,.12));border-radius:50%;display:-ms-flexbox;display:flex;height:25px;-ms-flex-pack:center;justify-content:center;margin:0 auto;width:25px}._2gaJVJ6_j7vwKV945EABN9{background-color:var(–newCommunityTheme-button);border-radius:50%;height:15px;width:15px;z-index:1}._3gbb_EMFXxTYrxDZ2kusIp[role=button]{margin-bottom:24px;text-transform:uppercase;width:100%}._3gbb_EMFXxTYrxDZ2kusIp[role=button]:last-child{margin-bottom:10px}._2YJDRz5rCYQfu8YdgB_neb{overflow:hidden;position:relative}._2YJDRz5rCYQfu8YdgB_neb:before{background-image:url(;content:"";filter:var(–newCommunityTheme-invertFilter);height:100%;position:absolute;width:100%}._37WD6iicVS6vGN0RomNTwh{padding:0 12px 12px;position:relative} /*# for size) which holds just enough water so I’d try to aim for squirting up that much water and now all of it.

First off – that many enemas is definitely NOT good for your body. If you are using the standard saline Fleet Enemas then you are actually doing something dangerous to your health. You don’t even really need to enema to get clean. Just having a bowel movement and showering before the act will generally get you clean enough.

Enemas loosen stuff up. Prepare 2 hours beforehand with an enema. Hold it in for a while and then flush it out. If you have to go, you’ll end up doing it within the next 2 hours. Then it’s simply a matter of having another quick enema.

Occasionally you’ll end up getting surprised again, but there’s not much you can do about that. Just know you’ll have more success than failure.

this – it’s not an enema & go! type situation… if you want to really clean out your ass, fill it up as much as you can (the $12 enema kit from your local drug store will work just fine) and hold it for as long as you can (important!)… I usually do 3 or 4 fill-ups (most people are good with 1-2), repeating this process, to really get everything outta there

And when I’m done, I like to put in a buttplug and wear it for about an hour before it’s business time – this should help you with "taking stuff" if by "stuff" you mean dicks up your butt

and for the record, I’m a woman who enjoys anal – gay guys aren’t the only ones who know "how to do it proper" 😉

gay anal sex advice 7cKXfBv

Don’t assume

Many people automatically equate gay sex with anal sex but not everyone who is gay enjoys it (and indeed, many straight people do enjoy it). Sexuality is no indication of specific sexual preferences. Always ask a partner what they’re into rather than thinking they’ll enjoy the same things that you do.

Why should i douche?

While we don’t want to yuck anyone’s yum, many people want to avoid creating an anal mess in the middle of sex. (Unless you’re into that.) For many, it’s a surefire way to kill the mood. If it does happen, know that it’s natural, nothing to be ashamed of, and we’ve all been there — but douching and other good habits can help you avoid it.

It’s just good manners to clean your ass before anal sex, so let’s talk about how.

gay anal sex advice 90cDcr

How long does it take to clean up before anal sex?

That depends on whether you’re doing an enema or douching.

But wait, what’s the difference between an enema vs a douche? It comes down to how thorough you want to be. A douche generally cleans out the area immediately inside the anus, while an enema goes further and flushes much more of the system. A douche can take ten minutes to a half hour; an enema can take several hours to complete. Enemas more typically use saline than water, since there’s more risk of upsetting your electrolyte balance if you do an enema with just water.

Enemas are also more risky, since they intrude deeper into the body. There’s a possibility of tearing sensitive tissues, which could require surgery to fix depending on the severity. Enemas can also cause side effects like nausea and vomiting, and can expose you to infections like Hepatitis if you’re not practicing good hygiene with your tools. For healthy people, there’s no medical benefit to enemas — services like “colon detox” are simply made-up pseudoscience.

But enemas can also leave you feeling much more confident about your cleanliness, and are more appropriate for more advanced kinds of anal play like fisting. Because they’re so much more thorough, you’ll shed a lot more internal matter and leave your system free of debris. If that’s important to you, an enema can feel better than a douche — but remember that it’s also more dangerous.

If you’re using a water bottle or other douching instrument, it’s much easier to do a basic cleaning of the immediate area inside your rectum than to try to flush out your whole colon, and if you’re only planning on bottoming, douching will be more than enough to prepare.

Does douching hurt?

It shouldn’t. If you put sharp plastic against your hole and it feels painful, stop what you’re doing — you might have cut into the tissues around your anus, in which case anal sex is definitely off the table until it heals. If you’re inserting a tool with an applicator tip into your rectum and it begins to hurt, stop immediately too.

You might feel cramps while douching. That’s usually normal and often means there’s more water to flush out. You can press on your abdomen or taint to try to hurry things along, or do some lower-back stretches in the shower to loosen things up. A bit of jiggling can also help with the flushing process (some do jumping jacks, but be careful not to slip or fall).

If you see blood, or if pain persists, you should stop what you’re doing right away, gently clean as best you can, and let your butt rest for several days. If pain or blood continue for more than a day, consult a doctor or free clinic — you’re definitely not the first person who’s come in with that problem, and they’ll know what to do.

gay anal sex advice AiLQ9s

Can changes to my diet make anal sex easier?

Yes! A healthy diet will keep things moving along. Eating the right amount of fiber can reduce the debris that gets caught in your colon. That means consuming plenty of leafy greens, whole wheat, and bran. (Or you can go the easy route with Metamucil.) Avoid cheeses, spicy food, and oily meats like beef.

You should also drink plenty of water. The more you put in your mouth, the less you’ll need up your butt.

Of course, everyone’s GI tract is unique, so what works for one person might not for another. Pay attention to how different foods make you feel, and the effect on your anal hygiene, to figure out what amount of fiber is best for you.

Two ways to top up

You should eat natural sources of fiber, including fresh fruits, vegetables, leafy greens, whole grains, and unprocessed bran. Incorporating any (or all) of these into your daily diet will increase your fiber intake. As for supplements, Metamucil, Citrucel, and Colon Cleanse Daily Fiber are common brands, available at any local grocery or drugstore. There is also Pure for Men, which is specifically designed for the gay community.

gay anal sex advice AuGsW2

1. prepare for the double penetration plunge

Preparation in anal sex is everything. And that means preparation on your own before picking those prize pricks to take your D.P. cherry. Double penetration is all about taking girth. Butt plugs and dildos are you dearest, most trusted friends. One double penetration tip is to commence operations with a large/thick butt plug, then move on to dildos. Work your way up from average to thicker devices. Start gently. Relish the challenge. But pace yourself. We all know what happens when your eyes are bigger than your tummy. Your silk bed sheets and shag pile carpet won’t thank you.

3: lather on that lube

OK, so you have your prize specimens pulsating. Here comes the main event. There are no two ways about it: you’re going to need lube. Lashings of lube. You may well boast about being the city’s foremost self-lubricating queen, but for double penetration forget it. This is anal sex in extremis. No matter the dimensions of your bargain bucket, you’ll need to be sticky and. Slick and smooth is essential. With two pistons slamming that shaft anything else is simply foolhardy. So soak that sphincter and drench those it up!

gay anal sex advice B6qTZrH

4: relax that ring

Relaxing your ring is important in all types of anal sex. Again, we come back to practice. But what fun one can have with that. Patience is paramount. Patience from you – and also from your Tops. You need to be primed for pleasure. Our double penetration tip is to take time to set the scene. Make sure you’re comfortable psychologically. And what better way to prep that puckered starfish than with an almighty lick out. Now, be absolutely clear with your Tops: No half measures. Nothing less than a total tongue thrashing will suffice here. And given the banquet you’re about to offer up, it’s precious little to demand really. Suitably moist and quivering? Absolutely. Long wait over. Lunge at that plunge time.

5: find your perfect double penetration positions

As with anal sex, you’ll find which positions work best for you. This should never be a case of ‘slam in the lamb’ – well, not until you’re an anal aficionado. Get loose, get comfortable. Another double penetration tip is to start with the cowboy position on the edge of the bed – or kitchen table if you’re feeling adventurous. Just think of yourself as the charcuterie. Top Two stands between Top One’s legs as you sink down on to that pork sword. Yes, you’ve guessed it: then it’s time for Top Two to have a rootle around. Dive right in, the water is fine! Sufficiently sloppy? Now, just like anal sex, you’re ready to experiment with other positions.

gay anal sex advice E1C0rBR

6: double penetration pleasure, not pain!

A word to the wise: the prostate is a beautiful thing and, as such, demands to be treated with respect. Get the pressure right, and you’ve got fireworks. No pain no gain? Indeed. But try and remember when you first indulged in ordinary, common-or-garden anal sex. Yes, we know it’s hard, but do try and cast your mind back. Slowly and carefully were your watch-words back then. Remember: pleasure should be a marathon, not a sprint. So galvanize that greedy Growler. Brace yourself: the brave new world that is Butt Stretcher Junction beckons… What are your experiences of double penetration? Have a double penetration tip to share? Comment in the forum! Images: model released from

guest jermy

Been doing dp since 09, my first time was payment for helping move furniture for a bisexual lesbian couple with dildos. after that i joined a hook up app and been doing since done it at least 2 or 3 times a week since. I really want to try triple whether its 3 people, don’t give a dam about the gender as lock as they got a cock or a dildo.

gay anal sex advice eoldolO

About the author

Dr. Evan Goldstein is the Co-Founder of Future Method and the Founder and CEO of Bespoke Surgical, the leading private practice in health and wellness for gay men. He received his MD from the University of Medicine and Dentistry School of Osteopathic Medicine. Dr. Goldstein is the go-to butt and bottoming expert, having been published in Huffington Post, Men’s Health, Healthline, and more. Learn about Dr. Goldstein by visiting his practice,

The views expressed in this article intend to highlight alternative studies and induce conversation. They are the views of the author and do not necessarily represent the views of Future Method, and are for informational purposes only, even if and to the extent that this article features the advice of physicians and medical practitioners. This article is not, nor is it intended to be, a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment, and should never be relied upon for specific medical advice.