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23.58C20.731 23.778 20.15 23.913 19.298 23.952C18.445 23.991 18.173 24 16 24C13.827 24 13.555 23.99 12.702 23.952C11.85 23.913 11.269 23.778 10.76 23.58C10.2262 23.379 9.74259 23.064 9.343 22.657C8.93593 22.2574 8.62093 21.7738 8.42 21.24C8.222 20.731 8.087 20.15 8.048 19.298C8.01 18.445 8 18.173 8 16C8 13.827 8.01 13.555 8.048 12.702C8.087 11.85 8.222 11.269 8.42 10.76C8.624 10.234 8.898 9.787 9.343 9.343C9.787 8.898 10.233 8.624 10.76 8.42C11.269 8.222 11.85 8.087 12.702 8.048C13.555 8.01 13.827 8 16 8ZM16 10C14.046 10 13.814 10.007 13.043 10.043C12.329 10.075 11.942 10.194 11.683 10.295C11.3657 10.4124 11.0787 10.5993 10.843 10.842C10.586 11.098 10.427 11.342 10.295 11.684C10.195 11.942 10.075 12.329 10.043 13.043C10.007 13.814 10 14.046 10 16C10 17.954 10.007 18.186 10.043 18.957C10.075 19.671 10.194 20.058 10.295 20.317C10.427 20.658 10.586 20.902 10.842 21.157C11.098 21.414 11.342 21.573 11.684 21.705C11.942 21.805 12.329 21.925 13.043 21.957C13.814 21.993 14.046 22 16 22C17.954 22 18.186 21.993 18.957 21.957C19.671 21.925 20.058 21.806 20.317 21.705C20.658 21.573 20.902 21.414 21.157 21.158C21.414 20.902 21.573 20.658 21.705 20.316C21.805 20.058 21.925 19.671 21.957 18.957C21.993 18.186 22 17.954 22 16C22 14.046 21.993 13.814 21.957 13.043C21.925 12.329 21.806 11.942 21.705 11.683C21.5876 11.3657 21.4007 11.0787 21.158 10.843C20.9219 10.5997 20.6341 10.4124 20.316 10.295C20.058 10.195 19.671 10.075 18.957 10.043C18.186 10.007 17.954 10 16 10ZM16 11.768C16.5558 11.768 17.1061 11.8775 17.6195 12.0901C18.133 12.3028 18.5995 12.6145 18.9925 13.0075C19.3855 13.4005 19.6972 13.867 19.9099 14.3805C20.1225 14.8939 20.232 15.4442 20.232 16C20.232 16.5558 20.1225 17.1061 19.9099 17.6195C19.6972 18.133 19.3855 18.5995 18.9925 18.9925C18.5995 19.3855 18.133 19.6972 17.6195 19.9099C17.1061 20.1225 16.5558 20.232 16 20.232C14.8776 20.232 13.8012 19.7861 13.0075 18.9925C12.2139 18.1988 11.768 17.1224 11.768 16C11.768 14.8776 12.2139 13.8012 13.0075 13.0075C13.8012 12.2139 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href="/culture"><span class="RubricName-fVtemz cLxcNi">Culture</span></a></div></div></div><h1 data-ttid="ContentHearHed" class="BaseWrap-sc-gjQpdd BaseText-ewhhUZ ContentHearHed-NCyCC iUEiRd jPOabC BjYFU">No, You’re Not Love wh Him, You Jt Want to Be Him</h1></div><div class="ContentHearAccredatn-lfctVB etVsnJ ntent-hear__accredatn" data-ttid="ContentHearAccredatn"><div class="ContentHearDek-bIqFFZ eASNBN">Queer attachment, pecially when we lack clear role mols, n get plited.</div><div class="ContentHearByle-kmPyCa emiglw"><div class="ContentHearByleContent-dpPmNn DRFq"><div data-ttid="BylWrapper" class="BylWrapper-KIudk irTIfE byl ContentHearByl-cZqgyJ bHLeKI"><p class="ByleWrapper-jWHrLH gtxxjM byle byl__byle" data-ttid="ByleWrapper" emProp="thor" emType="><span emProp="name" class="ByleNamWrapper-jbHncj fuDQVo"><span data-ttid="ByleName" class="ByleName-kwmrLn cYaBaU byle__name"><span class="BaseWrap-sc-gjQpdd BaseText-ewhhUZ BylePreamble-iJolpQ iUEiRd dlWgVJ gnILss byle__preamble">By </span><a class="BaseWrap-sc-gjQpdd BaseText-ewhhUZ BaseLk-eNWuiM ByleLk-gEnFiw iUEiRd fhQbnq dzFUnH eErqIx byle__name-lk button" href="/ntributor/alim-kheraj">Alim Kheraj</a></span></span></p></div><time data-ttid="ContentHearPublishDate" dateTime="2018-02-01T08:00:00-05:00" class="BaseWrap-sc-gjQpdd BaseText-ewhhUZ ContentHearPublishDate-eIBicG iUEiRd ivrQAn cZpOSL">Febary 1, 2018</time></div></div><div class="SocialInsWrapper-hKMEXV ffgPVr social-ins social-ins--standard ContentHearAccredatnSocialIns-jorO fPzfaa ntent-hear__social-share"><ul data-ttid="socialInslist" class="SocialInsList-cHVTIA ivmblD social-ins__list"></ul></div></div></div><div class="ContentHearLeadAsset-hGbumP fEknXh lead-asset ContentHearLeadAssetWrapper-hfXHEc Grck lead-asset--width-fullbleed" data-ttid="ContentHearLeadAsset"><figure class="ContentHearLeadAssetContent-kOfYSG dRGWbI"><div class="ContentHearLeadAssetContentMedia-bLEIpi jjhWdS lead-asset__ntent__photo"><span 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style="posn:absolute;top:to;height:to" data-ttid="PersistentAsiWrapper"><div class="StickyBoxWrapper-jfYB jNgrSF sticky-box ContentHearPersistentAsi-fsnAmQ dFzKzm"><div class="StickyBoxPrimary-dzWDWL cdhYoN sticky-box__primary"><div class="SocialInsWrapper-hKMEXV ffgPVr social-ins social-ins--has-background ContentHearSocialIns-jzJiyg ctaZl social-ins--share"><ul data-ttid="socialInslist" class="SocialInsList-cHVTIA ivmblD social-ins__list"></ul></div></div><div class="StickyBoxPlaceholr-grPmrg dxAvXx"></div></div></asi></hear></div><div data-attribute-verso-pattern="article-body" class="ArticlePageContentBackGround-cNiFNN kJkLmH article-body__ntent"><div class="ArticlePageChunksContent-etcMtP eRxRjL"><div data-ttid="ArticlePageChunks" class="ArticlePageChunks-fLyCVG eOdfIs"><div class="GridWrapper-cAzTTK kHBDeH grid grid-margs grid-ems-2 ArticlePageChunksGrid-hfxa bjczjj grid-layout--adrail narrow wi-adrail"><div class="GridItem-buujkM stRKV grid--em grid-layout__ntent"><div class="BodyWrapper-kufPGa edvONh body body__ntaer article__body" data-journey-hook="client-ntent" data-ttid="BodyWrapper"><div class="body__ner-ntaer"><p>Answer me this: How many tim have you turned around and realized that you’d actually been ltg after one of your iends, or that straight lleague who’s always so nice to you and offers to make you cups of ffee? How many tim have you sat spairg the quagmire that is unrequed love? If the answer is a lot, you’re not unique…you’re jt gay.</p><p>The feelgs of nfn are practilly a gay re of passage. Our adolcent years are spent ltg after our (maly straight) classmat who, if they knew that you’d had more than one wet dream about them that week alone, would’ve likely beaten the livg crap out of you. When we get olr, we hope that the nvenient feelgs will dissipate, bee the real world is nothg like high school and is actually filled wh ripe homosexuals who’ll lt after and love back. This is, unfortunately, only partially te, bee as adults those straight boys bee gay boys, and so, while there might be a b of reciprocy, we’re still left fancyg a iend, -worker, or that cute guy who works at Barn & Noble and whose glance always lgers jt a b too long when you buy a book (and you buy too many bee of said cute guy. You should really stop buyg so many books. Why've you bought this many books?).</p><p>In my md, this repetive pattern occurs for a reason: For queer people, the fns of iendships and relatnships aren’t as formulaic or okie-cutter as for our heterosexual pals, and that’s bee the distctns between platonic and romantic love don’t que f queer experienc.</p><div class="Contaer-bkChBi byNLHx"></div><p>As signaled by Twter er @noonbary, the fns of “love” are born om heteronormativy (bee, as we know, straight culture is all about prcribg to bari). We first learn about the nstrictns as teenagers cshg on unavailable straight guys, and the gut-wrenchg and soul-breakg fatuatns, more often than not, end drenched disappotment, rejectn, and pangs of lonels. It’s bee heteronormative society teach that if you have romantic feelgs for someone, you should act some way upon them, and the suatns gays rarely n.</p><div><div class="ConsumerMarketgUnThemedWrapper-iUTMTf jssHut nsumer-marketg-un nsumer-marketg-un--article-mid-ntent" role="prentatn" aria-hidn="te"><div class="nsumer-marketg-un__slot nsumer-marketg-un__slot--article-mid-ntent nsumer-marketg-un__slot---ntent"></div><div class="journey-un"></div></div></div><p>Now, I’m not advotg for gay people to keep their romantic clatns to themselv. In fact, que the oppose. It’s jt that LGBTQ people are often tght their sir are shameful, so our twg of attractn or the flutterg of butterfli are supprsed until they mutate, beg self-doubt as we blame ourselv for not beg able to keep our feelgs check (as if that were actually possible).</p><div class="AdWrapper-dQtivb fZrssQ ad ad---ntent"><div class="ad__slot ad__slot---ntent" data-no-id="4dd36"></div></div><p>Still, acrdg to social psychologist Roy F. Bmeister, unrequed love (if you want to ll that) affects 98 percent of all people, so what mak queers so different here? Well, the straight world—I, wh my <em>very</em> limed knowledge, believe—you don’t go out searchg for people whose sexuali might mirror your own bee you don’t have to; straight people are already fuckg everywhere. It’s why LGBTQ people obss over any form of reprentatn and why, as soon as <em>one</em> gay person is nice to , we assume that we’re love wh them and meant to spend the rt of our liv together like somethg om a Nora Ephron movie.</p></div></div></div><div class="GridItem-buujkM fVLMby grid--em grid-layout__asi"><div class="StickyBoxWrapper-jfYB kNleGZ sticky-box"><div class="StickyBoxPrimary-dzWDWL cdhYoN sticky-box__primary"><div class="Contaer-bkChBi byNLHx"></div><div class="AdWrapper-dQtivb fZrssQ ad ad--rail"><div class="ad__slot ad__slot--rail" data-no-id="j2dxv2"></div></div><div class="ConsumerMarketgUnThemedWrapper-iUTMTf jssHut nsumer-marketg-un nsumer-marketg-un--display-rail" role="prentatn" aria-hidn="te"><div class="nsumer-marketg-un__slot nsumer-marketg-un__slot--display-rail"></div><div class="journey-un"></div></div></div><div class="StickyBoxPlaceholr-grPmrg dxAvXx"></div></div></div></div><div class="RowWrapper-UmqTg HEhan full-bleed-ad row-mid-ntent-ad"><div class="StickyMidContentAdWrapper-fSBzwl drzyIa ad-stickymidntent"><div class="AdWrapper-dQtivb fZrssQ ad ad--mid-ntent should-hold-space"><div class="ad__slot ad__slot--mid-ntent" data-no-id="7g5ja"></div></div></div></div><div class="GridWrapper-cAzTTK kHBDeH grid grid-margs grid-ems-2 ArticlePageChunksGrid-hfxa bjczjj grid-layout--adrail narrow wi-adrail"><div class="GridItem-buujkM stRKV grid--em grid-layout__ntent"><div class="BodyWrapper-kufPGa edvONh body body__ntaer article__body" data-journey-hook="client-ntent" data-ttid="BodyWrapper"><div class="body__ner-ntaer"><p>The latter falls directly to the “do I want to be wh them or do I jt want to be them” nundm and why, perhaps, romantic and platonic love is a dichotomy not f for queer nsumptn. Almost every time I’ve formed a ep and supportive iendship wh someone else who’s also gay, I’ve had to wonr where my feelgs lie: Do I fancy them or don’t I? Ultimately, ’s not so black and whe. Of urse, if you like boys and your bt iend is a boy and that boy is hot and you want to bone said boy, then that might signal that you maybe fd them attractive. But when a relatnship is about more than jt sexual attractn or a quick fuck, the mutiae of queer attachment is more plited.</p><div data-attr-viewport-monor="le-recirc" class="le-recirc-wrapper le-recirc-observer-target-1 viewport-monor-anchor"></div><p>From my experienc, the distctns of love weren’t two-sid; they were blurry and multifaceted. I had an attractn to the people, sure, but that attractn stemmed om their return of affectns, om their kdns, and bee they rpected, unrstood, and lived somethg ak to my own queer experience.</p><p>There was also, I’ll adm eely, an element of emulatn; I wanted to be jt like them bee of their succs/attractivens/abily to pick up guys. Gay people don’t always have role mols to look up to, so we turn to our iends and those around and try and live as they do.</p><p>Do all this mean that I loved them or that I was love wh them? Perhaps ’s both. The balance of attractn might be hard to get right, but I thk that’s bee, as LGBTQ people, we’re also programmed wh the same heteronormative nstcts about platonic and romantic love when they don’t align wh . Thankfully, we don’t have to live by those l.</p><p>You see, feelgs are never as clear-cut as heterosexuals would like you to believe, and our iendships don’t need to mirror those of the girls om <em>Sex and the Cy</em> or a “bromance” om whatever realy-TV show MTV is peddlg. Instead, ridg around the middle ground, the gray area, takg a break to explore all the nflictg and joyful nfn, the ebb and flow of human nature, n be a blsg. Really, there’s no wrong or right way to navigate your feelgs, pecially when those feelgs don’t nform to perceived normaly.</p><p>All this is an important distctn to make, pecially when gay people do stggle wh so much ternalized shame. It’s time to rip up the hetero lebook for feelgs forever. So learn to embrace your nfg feelgs, and know ’s okay to fl between platonic and romantic love, jt like ’s okay to csh on that straight -worker who always brgs you ffee. As LGBTQ people, we’re able to form unique bonds, and part of this should be beg able to create new forms for iendships, relatnships, and ed love that don’t f to prcribed bari. That’s the future that this gay liberal really wants.</p></div></div></div><div class="GridItem-buujkM fVLMby grid--em grid-layout__asi"><div class="StickyBoxWrapper-jfYB jxBcTH sticky-box"><div class="StickyBoxPrimary-dzWDWL cdhYoN sticky-box__primary"><div class="AdWrapper-dQtivb fZrssQ ad ad--rail"><div class="ad__slot ad__slot--rail" data-no-id="ntxm28"></div></div><div class="ConsumerMarketgUnThemedWrapper-iUTMTf jssHut nsumer-marketg-un nsumer-marketg-un--display-rail" role="prentatn" aria-hidn="te"><div class="nsumer-marketg-un__slot nsumer-marketg-un__slot--display-rail"></div><div class="journey-un"></div></div></div><div class="StickyBoxPlaceholr-grPmrg dxAvXx"></div></div></div></div></div><div class="GridWrapper-cAzTTK kHBDeH grid grid-margs grid-ems-2 PaywallInleBarrierWhWrapperGrid-fyrGfS kLQIUk grid-layout--adrail narrow wi-adrail"><div class="GridItem-buujkM stRKV grid--em grid-layout__ntent"><div class="body body__le-barrier article__body"><div class="ntaer 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you just gay

Kev Spacey Explas Why He Came Out as Gay While Beg Acced of Sexual Misnduct Kev Spacey took the wns stand today durg his trial London. If you are not aware, the 63-year-old Hoe of Cards actor is currently on trial London…

Contents:

HOW TO ACCEPT THAT YOU ARE GAY

Are you qutng your sexualy? Fd out if you’re gay, straight, bisexual, or asexual. Learn what the terms mean and if they apply to you. * you just gay *

Most people the LGBTQ+ muny know om experience that acceptg your sexualy will lead to your beg a happier, more open this gui, the term gay has been ed to clu all forms of non-heterosexual attractn, whether that be people who are lbian, gay, bisexual, queer, pansexual, or otherwise not straight. There isn't any need to change yourself - beg gay is jt another way of simply existg, and there is nothg wrong wh at all. Beg gay do not necsarily make you any ls mascule or feme, and there is no need or prsure to nform to stereotyp that don't feel right to you - bee you are who you are.

The laws the Bible were maly for health purpos - shunng homosexualy is right next to not gettg tattoos, not eatg pork, and not wearg mixed lens, but you n bet your bottom dollar all your neighbors do those thgs.

It is important to note that the Amerin Psychologil Associatn has clared that groups claimg to cure homosexualy are dangero and unhealthy.

AM I GAY?

Joe Kort, Ph.D., talks about his new book, "Is My Hband Gay, Straight, or Bi?" * you just gay *

If you are still beg supported by parents whom you are que sure would disown you for beg gay, may be pnt to wa to tell them until you are pennt. You may regret the acceptance of your orientatn the future, pecially if you're a part of the world where the gay muny is beg prosecuted by a specific culture. Article SummaryXIf you stggle wh acceptg your attractn to the same sex, know that beg gay is pletely normal and you n be proud of who you are by fdg support and embracg your dividualy.

HOW TO KNOW IF YOU ARE GAY

How do I know if I am gay? Are there fe signs you are gay? We have answers. Consir the signs you might be gay. * you just gay *

It’s also important to unrstand that you don’t need to nform to gay stereotyp or tl, as they are artificial social nstcts. Gay - While this adjective has historilly scribed men who are attracted to other men, the term now is ed to refer to anyone who experienc romantic, emotnal, or physil attractn to people of the same genr. Keep md that even if you have a sexual experience wh someone of the same genr or another genr, that don’t necsarily mean that you’re gay.

‘I AM GAY – BUT I WASN’T BORN THIS WAY’

gay - WordReference English dictnary, qutns, discsn and foms. All Free. * you just gay *

That means, for example, that you n be transgenr but also straight (for stance, you might intify as a woman and feel attracted to men) or gay (e.

If you have had romantic experienc or fantasi volvg people who are the same genr as you, then there is a good chance you are gay or bisexual, but 's okay if you're a ltle nfed. Why Do You Need To Take Up The Am I Gay Quiz?Table of Contents1 Why Do You Need To Take Up The Am I Gay Quiz?2 Hts And Experienc Predictg Gay Behavr2.1 High School Csh2.2 Cheatg A Girl2.3 Means Of Copg Wh Rejectn2.4 Checkg Out Other Men2.5 Good-Lookg Women Don’t Attract You2.6 Sex Wh A Girliend Don’t Exce You3 Qutns Preview. Takg mental health to nsiratn, many men have started qutng if they are terted datg women or men and takg up the am I gay quiz.

Even if some of the wilst adventur wh your girliend don’t exce you and the image of another man shirtls or a naked photo exc you to the re, then there are chanc that you might be gay. If you are a man and fd problems wh nnectg to a woman, you need to take up the am I gay quiz, which provis you wh a perspective. You so obvly nnot be gay, was her implitn, bee this is good was 2006, a full five years before Lady Gaga would set the Born This Way argument atop s unassailable cultural perch, but even then the popular unrstandg of orientatn was that was somethg you were born wh, somethg you uldn’t change.

HOW TO GET A MAN (FOR GAY MEN)

I me out at a nservative Christian llege the US and was a gay relatnship for around two years wh a basketball player who end up marryg a woman.

IS YOUR MAN GAY, STRAIGHT, OR BISEXUAL?

Well, you mt have been gay the whole time, some might thk, and bee of some relig shame, you cid to lie to yourself and experiment wh a girl. But what feels most accurate to say is that I’m gay – but I wasn’t born this people may fd their sir changg directn - and n't jt be explaed as experimentatn (Cred: Ignac Lehmann)In 1977, jt over 10% of Amerins thought gayns was somethg you were born wh, acrdg to Gallup.

Throughout the same perd, the number of Amerins who believe homosexualy is “due to someone’s upbrgg/environment” fell om jt unr 60% to ias reached cril mass pop culture, first wh Lady Gaga’s 2011 Born This Way and one year later wh Macklemore’s Same Love, the chos of which has a gay person sgg “I n’t change even if I tried, even if I wanted to. ” Around the same time, the Human Rights Campaign clared unequivolly that “Beg gay is not a choice, ” and to claim that is “giv unwarranted crence to roundly disproven practic such as nversn or reparative therapy.

WHAT TO DO WHEN YOUR CHILD SAYS: "I'M GAY"

”People who challenge the Born This Way narrative are often st as homophobic, and their thkg is nsired backwardAs Jane Ward not Not Gay: Sex Between Straight Whe Men, what’s tertg about many of the claims is how transparent their speakers are wh their polil motivatns.

“Such statements, ” she wr, “fe blogil acunts wh an obligatory and nearly ercive force, suggtg that anyone who scrib homosexual sire as a choice or social nstctn is playg to the hands of the enemy. ” People who challenge the Born This Way narrative are often st as homophobic, and their thkg is nsired backward – even if they are themselv, for example, Cynthia Nixon of Sex and The Cy fame.

HOW DO I KNOW IF I AM GAY? SIGNS YOU ARE GAY

Callg me “idtic” and “patently absurd”, Aravosis wrote, “The gay haters at the relig right uldn’t have wrten any better. ”Gay rights do not have to hge on a geic explanatn for sexualy (Cred: Ignac Lehmann)For Aravosis, and many gay activists like him, the public will only accept and affirm gay people if they thk they were born gay. Patrick Grzanka, Assistant Profsor of Psychology at Universy of Tennsee, for stance, has shown that some people who believe that homosexualy is nate still hold negative views of gays.

In fact, the homophobic and non-homophobic rponnts he studied shared siar levels of belief a Born This Way Samantha Allen not at The Daily Beast, the growg public support for gays and lbians has grown out of proportn wh the rise the number of people who believe homosexualy is fixed at birth; would be unlikely that this small change opn uld expla the spike support for gay marriage, for stance. “It don’t seem to matter as much whether or not people believe that gay people are born that way as do that they simply know someone who is currently gay, ” Allen spe of the studi, those who ph agast Born This Way narrativ have been heavily cricised by gay activists. Siarly, Ward has received her own hatemail for phg agast the lg LGB narrativ, wh some gays tellg her she’s “worse than Ann Coulter, ” the ntroversial US thor of books like If Democrats Had Any Bras, They’d Be Republins.

KEV SPACEY EXPLAS WHY HE CAME OUT AS GAY WHILE BEG ACCED OF SEXUAL MISNDUCT

And when I published my say on choosg to be gay, an irate Amerin lbian activist wrote me that had “jt been nfirmed” to her that my wrg was “directly rponsible for four gay aths Rsia. There is a unanimo opn that gay “nversn therapy” should be rejectedLet’s first be clear that whatever the origs of our sexual orientatn, there is a unanimo opn that gay “nversn therapy” should be rejected. The efforts are potentially harmful, acrdg to the APA, “bee they prent the view that the sexual orientatn of lbian, gay and bisexual youth is a mental illns of disorr, and they often ame the abily to change one’s sexual orientatn as a personal and moral failure.

The APA, for example, while notg that most people experience ltle to no choice over their orientatns, says this of homosexualy’s origs:“Although much rearch has examed the possible geic, hormonal, velopmental, social and cultural fluenc on sexual orientatn, no fdgs have emerged that perm scientists to nclu that sexual orientatn is termed by any particular factor or factors. ”Siarly, the Amerin Psychiatric Associatn wr a 2013 statement that while the of heterosexualy and homosexualy are currently unknown, they are likely “multifactorial cludg blogil and behavral roots which may vary between different dividuals and may even vary over time. ” Acrdg to LeVay’s rearch, a specific part of the bra, the third terstial nucls of the anterr hypothalam (INAH-3), is smaller homosexual men than is heterosexual as they might, scientists have stggled to inty any particular gen that nsistently predict the directns of our love and sire (Cred: Ignac Lehmann)Read moreYou n spot the problem wh this study a e away: were the gay bras LeVay studied born that way, or did they bee that way?

Another landmark paper on the origs of homosexualy was published 1993 by a geicist named Dean Hamer, who was terted to learn whether homosexualy uld be hered. Begng om his observatn that there are more gay relativ on a mother’s si than a father’s, Hamer turned his attentn to the X chromosome (which is passed on by the mother).

*BEAR-MAGAZINE.COM* YOU JUST GAY

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