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class="nsumer-marketg-un__slot nsumer-marketg-un__slot--paywall-bar-ll-to-actn"></div><div class="journey-un"></div></div></asi></div><div class="SpaceHolr-oayp fXtswJ ad-height-hold"></div><div class="StickyHeroAdWrapper-eNLJUc gStsdY ad-stickyhero ad-stickyhero--standard ad-stickyhero-enable-mobile should-hold-space"><div class="AdWrapper-dQtivb fZrssQ ad ad--hero"><div class="ad__slot ad__slot--hero" data-no-id="bcqxc8"></div></div><div class="ConsumerMarketgUnThemedWrapper-iUTMTf jssHut nsumer-marketg-un nsumer-marketg-un--display-hero" role="prentatn" aria-hidn="te"><div class="nsumer-marketg-un__slot nsumer-marketg-un__slot--display-hero"></div><div class="journey-un"></div></div></div><div class="SpaceHolr-oayp fXtswJ ad-height-hold"></div><ma id="ma-ntent" tabx="-1" class="BasePageMaContent-kFvAuh ewPCZH page__ma-ntent"><article class="article ma-ntent" lang="en-US"><div class="ArticlePageLeBackground-EufvU tFsh"><hear class="ContentHearWrapper-clujbs cHjRrO ntent-hear article__ntent-hear"><div data-ttid="ContentHearContaer" class="ContentHearContaer-cGKRbE knDxNq"><div class="ContentHearHedAccredatnWrapper-GFiQf cDNVlV"><div data-ttid="ContentHearTleBlockWrapper" class="ContentHearTleBlockWrapper-cjmSKp ikebRK"><div data-ttid="ContentHearRubric" class="ContentHearRubricBlock-LmpbT hjnEYM"><div data-ttid="ContentHearRubricDateBlock" class="ContentHearRubricDateBlock-kAQcZP fTFWxD"><div class="RubricWrapper-dKmCNX iJOI bric ContentHearRubricContaer-eTudtt edKnIL"><a class="RubricLk-gRWSOU kImecF bric__lk" href="/news"><span class="RubricName-fVtemz cLxcNi">News</span></a></div></div><div class="RubricWrapper-dKmCNX iJOI bric ContentHearRubricIssueDate-CuIT fFtVss"><span class="RubricName-fVtemz cLxcNi">March 1999 Issue</span></div></div><h1 data-ttid="ContentHearHed" class="BaseWrap-sc-gjQpdd BaseText-ewhhUZ ContentHearHed-NCyCC iUEiRd khNpd gydgrM">The Ccifixn of Matthew Shepard</h1><span class="ContentHearContentDivir-liIxwf eicslv"></span></div><div class="ContentHearAccredatn-lfctVB etVsnJ ntent-hear__accredatn" data-ttid="ContentHearAccredatn"><div class="ContentHearDek-bIqFFZ fYeNbg">Tied to a woon fence, tortured, and left to die, 21-year-old Matthew Shepard—a bright, sensive hman at the Universy of Wyomg—has bee a natnal symbol of vlence agast gays. His killers, Aaron McKney and Rsell Henrson, products of a grim world of dgs, alhol, broken hom, and twisted dreams, have been charged wh first-gree murr. And the town of Laramie, home to all three, stands revealed as an Amerin paradox: a God-fearg, iendly place that harbors ep and lgerg prejudice. Melanie Thernstrom explor the hidn topography of a killg.</div><div class="ContentHearByle-kmPyCa emiglw"><div class="ContentHearByleContent-dpPmNn DRFq"><div data-ttid="BylWrapper" class="BylWrapper-KIudk irTIfE byl ContentHearByl-cZqgyJ bHLeKI"></div><time data-ttid="ContentHearPublishDate" dateTime="2014-01-08T13:42:36-05:00" class="BaseWrap-sc-gjQpdd BaseText-ewhhUZ ContentHearPublishDate-eIBicG iUEiRd bSlZUC cmPkTr">January 8, 2014</time></div></div></div></div></div></hear></div><div data-attribute-verso-pattern="article-body" class="ArticlePageContentBackGround-cNiFNN gVjmSM article-body__ntent"><div class="ActnBarWrapperContent-lasBkU cAHp"><div class="ActnBarWrapperComponent-cjwxLS bEeSLb"><div data-attr-viewport-monor="" class="ActnBarWrapper-dhxmQh izlawS viewport-monor-anchor"><button id="bookmark" aria-label="Save" class="ActnBarButton-dyFOZU foKBbl bookmark large-screen"><span class="ActnBarSendaryButtonPrimaryIn-isbvyN cAwccV bookmark-button-in"><svg class="in in-bookmark" width="24" height="24" viewBox="0 0 24 24" fill="none" xmlns="><tle>Save this story</tle><path class="in-bookmark-stroke" d="M11.7661 16.3228L4.5 20.1695V3.5H19.5V20.1695L12.2339 16.3228L12 16.199L11.7661 16.3228Z" stroke-lep="square"/></svg></span><span class="BaseWrap-sc-gjQpdd BaseText-ewhhUZ ActnBarButtonText-bYXYuh iUEiRd kdAzed gkccfO">Save</span></button></div><div data-attr-viewport-monor="" class="ActnBarWrapper-dhxmQh ledqMp viewport-monor-anchor"><button id="bookmark" aria-label="Save" class="ActnBarButton-dyFOZU ePWKOF bookmark mobile"><span class="ActnBarSendaryButtonPrimaryIn-isbvyN cAwccV bookmark-button-in"><svg class="in in-bookmark" width="24" height="24" viewBox="0 0 24 24" fill="none" xmlns="><tle>Save this story</tle><path class="in-bookmark-stroke" d="M11.7661 16.3228L4.5 20.1695V3.5H19.5V20.1695L12.2339 16.3228L12 16.199L11.7661 16.3228Z" stroke-lep="square"/></svg></span><span class="BaseWrap-sc-gjQpdd BaseText-ewhhUZ ActnBarButtonText-bYXYuh iUEiRd kdAzed gkccfO">Save</span></button></div></div></div><div class="ArticlePageChunksContent-etcMtP bwyLBj"><div data-ttid="ArticlePageChunks" class="ArticlePageChunks-fLyCVG hdASCv"><div class="GridWrapper-cAzTTK kHBDeH grid grid-margs grid-ems-2 ArticlePageChunksGrid-hfxa bjczjj grid-layout--adrail narrow wi-adrail"><div class="GridItem-buujkM stRKV grid--em grid-layout__ntent"><div class="BodyWrapper-kufPGa lnwCqV body body__ntaer article__body" data-journey-hook="client-ntent" data-ttid="BodyWrapper"><div class="body__ner-ntaer"><p class="has-dropp">The first time Doc O’Connor met Matthew Shepard, the 21-year-old Universy of Wyomg hman approached Doc’s silver limoe outsi a fé downtown Laramie. “Hi,” he said. “My name’s Matt. I’m gay and I want to go to a gay bar Fort Colls. Do you have a problem wh that?”</p><p>“No, I don’t have a problem wh that,” Doc told him. “I have a problem wh people who don’t pay!” The limo driver lghs, rememberg—a ep belly lgh. Doc, a stout 50-year-old man wh a beard, gray-black hair slicked back, and wboy boots, is the owner of Doc’s Class Act Limoe Service, as well as Doc’s Wtern Village, and most of the town of Bosler—a blk of a place 18 north of Laramie nsistg of board-up storeonts and yg woon ho.</p><p class="paywall">On Friday, October 2, Doc drove Matthew, who was ut about drkg and drivg, and the young man’s iend Ta Labrie the 70 to Fort Colls, Colorado, and back. (There are no openly gay bars Wyomg.) Matthew told Doc to ll him Matt, rather than Sir or Mr. Shepard, and asked him not to open the door for him. The followg Monday, Matthew lled om downtown and asked the olr man to pick him up. He sat up ont the limoe wh Doc, who said he had been on his way to Subway to get a sandwich. Matthew asked if he uld go wh him.</p><div class="Contaer-bkChBi byNLHx"></div><p class="paywall">They stayed at the rtrant for two hours, talkg. Doc had recently set up a Web se for his bs: “Matt was really to puters, and I’m jt a 10th-gra dropout,” Doc says. “He told me all about Sdi Arabia,” where his parents live, and what kd of guy he liked. “He said, ‘Doc, don’t take offense, but I wouldn’t go wh you. You’re not my type and you’re too old!’” Doc rells, sg. “He told me about Cody and gettg his jaw bted.” (Last summer Cody, Wyomg, he had been beaten by a bartenr who said Matthew had ma a pass at him.) Doc asked, “‘What did you do to the people who beat the sh out of you?’ He said, ‘I fave them and went on wh my life.’ Then he paid for my dner. He was a real nice guy, Matt.”</p><div class="AdWrapper-dQtivb fZrssQ ad ad---ntent"><div class="ad__slot ad__slot---ntent" data-no-id="20kpri"></div></div><p class="paywall">On Tuday, Matthew lled Doc om the Library, a lol bar; he wanted the limoe that night to go someplace wh some iends. Doc was supposed to attend an Eagl Club tste meetg, but said he’d try. They spoke aga early the eveng, and Doc told Matthew to ll back later that night, but he didn’t hear om him. Wednday morng, Doc lled him, but Matthew’s cell phone rang and rang.</p><div><div class="ConsumerMarketgUnThemedWrapper-iUTMTf jssHut nsumer-marketg-un nsumer-marketg-un--article-mid-ntent" role="prentatn" aria-hidn="te"><div class="nsumer-marketg-un__slot nsumer-marketg-un__slot--article-mid-ntent nsumer-marketg-un__slot---ntent"></div><div class="journey-un"></div></div></div><p class="paywall">At 4:25 P.M. outsi a nvenience store, Doc bumped to Kristen Price, a blon 18-year-old who was rryg her fant son her arms. Kristen and her boyiend, Aaron McKney—who was awag sentencg on a burglary nvictn—had recently moved out of an apartment attached to one of Doc’s buildgs Bosler.</p><div data-attr-viewport-monor="le-recirc" class="le-recirc-wrapper le-recirc-observer-target-1 viewport-monor-anchor"></div><p class="paywall">“I’m askg how did Aaron size up to this al [the sentencg],” he rells, “and she told me he’s gettg probatn, he’s gog to pay off. Then she says there’s somethg else, a new problem. ‘They’re gog to get him for attempted murr—for beatg some gay guy up.’”</p><p class="paywall">“Honey,” Doc told her, “ the state of Wyomg you don’t go to jail for beatg on a gay guy.”</p><p class="paywall">Although Doc had been tryg to reach Matthew all that day, didn’t occur to him that Kristen would have been talkg about Matthew.</p><p class="paywall">Two hours after Doc’s nversatn wh Kristen, a passg cyclist saw what he thought was a srecrow lashed to a woon buck fence on a remote plot of land. The srecrow turned out to be Matthew, unnsc, a huge gash his head, his face drenched wh blood except where his tear trails had washed clean. 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class="aspect-rat--overlay-ntaer"><picture class="RponsiveImagePicture-cWuUZO dUOtEa SummaryItemRponsiveAsset-hjGIGg egpoQR summary-em__image rponsive-image"><noscript><source media="(max-width: 767px)" srcSet="" siz="100vw"/><source media="(m-width: 768px)" srcSet="" siz="100vw"/><img alt="Vany Fair’s “It’s Rag Teens” Cover at 20: Where Are They Now?" class="RponsiveImageContaer-eybHBd fptoWY rponsive-image__image" src="></noscript></picture></div></div></span></a></div><div class="SummaryItemContent-eiDYMl XMZX summary-em__ntent summary-em__ntent--no-bric"><a class="SummaryItemHedLk-civM fPFrPI summary-em-trackg__hed-lk summary-em__hed-lk" data-ponent-type="recirc-river" data-recirc-id="em-hed-1" data-recirc-pattern="summary-em" href=" target="_self"><div data-ttid="ClampWrapper" class="ClampWrapper-kZxfkB hTTNGO clamp SummaryItemHedBase-hiFYpQ hRVxvR summary-em__hed"><div class="ClampContent-hilPkr jVhSBH"><div class="SummaryItemHedTag-TWblf gxaOcP" data-ttid="SummaryItemHed"><em>Vany Fair</em>’s “It’s Rag Teens” Cover at 20: Where Are They Now?</div></div></div></a><div class="SummaryItemByleWrapper-boCfbi cuRXdL summary-em__byle-date-in"><div class="SummaryItemBaseByle-fFbXkY gRtaxp summary-em__byle"><div class="summary-em__byle__ntent"><div data-ttid="BylWrapper" class="BylWrapper-KIudk irTIfE byl"><p class="ByleWrapper-jWHrLH iNSiTG byle byl__byle" data-ttid="ByleWrapper" emProp="thor" emType="><span emProp="name" class="ByleNamWrapper-jbHncj fuDQVo"><span data-ttid="ByleName" class="ByleName-kwmrLn cYaBaU byle__name"><span class="BaseWrap-sc-gjQpdd BaseText-ewhhUZ BylePreamble-iJolpQ iUEiRd bIbWCO gnILss byle__preamble">By </span>Savannah Walsh</span></span></p></div></div></div></div></div></div></li><li><div class="SummaryItemWrapper-iwvBff doDafW summary-em summary-em--has-borr summary-em--ARTICLE summary-em--no-in summary-em--text-align-left summary-em--layout-placement-si-by-si summary-em--layout-posn-image-left summary-em--layout-proportns-33-66 summary-em--si-by-si-align-center summary-em--si-by-si-image-right-mobile-false summary-em--standard RecircMostPopularSummaryItem-jQxxiw jkeAv" role="button" tabx="0"><div class="SummaryItemAssetContaer-gwhFFH VOyg summary-em__asset-ntaer"><a class="SummaryItemImageLk-dshqxb cPpCwE summary-em__image-lk summary-em-trackg__image-lk" href=" aria-hidn="te" tabx="-1" data-ponent-type="recirc-river" data-recirc-id="em-image-2" data-recirc-pattern="summary-em" target="_self"><span class="SpanWrapper-umhxW kGxnNB rponsive-asset SummaryItemRponsiveAsset-hjGIGg egpoQR summary-em__image"><div data-tt="aspect-rat-ntaer" class="AspectRatContaer-bJHpJz cCcPgL"><div class="aspect-rat--overlay-ntaer"><picture class="RponsiveImagePicture-cWuUZO dUOtEa SummaryItemRponsiveAsset-hjGIGg egpoQR summary-em__image rponsive-image"><noscript><source media="(max-width: 767px)" srcSet="" siz="100vw"/><source media="(m-width: 768px)" srcSet="" siz="100vw"/><img alt="Rememberg Séad O’Connor’s Sublime Mic and Righteo Rage" class="RponsiveImageContaer-eybHBd fptoWY rponsive-image__image" src="></noscript></picture></div></div></span></a></div><div class="SummaryItemContent-eiDYMl XMZX summary-em__ntent summary-em__ntent--no-bric"><a class="SummaryItemHedLk-civM fPFrPI summary-em-trackg__hed-lk summary-em__hed-lk" data-ponent-type="recirc-river" data-recirc-id="em-hed-2" data-recirc-pattern="summary-em" href=" target="_self"><div data-ttid="ClampWrapper" class="ClampWrapper-kZxfkB hTTNGO clamp SummaryItemHedBase-hiFYpQ hRVxvR summary-em__hed"><div class="ClampContent-hilPkr jVhSBH"><div class="SummaryItemHedTag-TWblf gxaOcP" data-ttid="SummaryItemHed">Rememberg Séad O’Connor’s Sublime Mic and Righteo Rage</div></div></div></a><div class="SummaryItemByleWrapper-boCfbi cuRXdL summary-em__byle-date-in"><div class="SummaryItemBaseByle-fFbXkY gRtaxp summary-em__byle"><div class="summary-em__byle__ntent"><div data-ttid="BylWrapper" class="BylWrapper-KIudk irTIfE byl"><p class="ByleWrapper-jWHrLH iNSiTG byle byl__byle" data-ttid="ByleWrapper" emProp="thor" emType="><span emProp="name" class="ByleNamWrapper-jbHncj fuDQVo"><span data-ttid="ByleName" class="ByleName-kwmrLn cYaBaU byle__name"><span class="BaseWrap-sc-gjQpdd BaseText-ewhhUZ BylePreamble-iJolpQ iUEiRd bIbWCO gnILss byle__preamble">By </span>Mike Hogan</span></span></p></div></div></div></div></div></div></li><li><div class="SummaryItemWrapper-iwvBff doDafW summary-em summary-em--has-borr summary-em--ARTICLE summary-em--no-in summary-em--text-align-left summary-em--layout-placement-si-by-si summary-em--layout-posn-image-left summary-em--layout-proportns-33-66 summary-em--si-by-si-align-center summary-em--si-by-si-image-right-mobile-false summary-em--standard RecircMostPopularSummaryItem-jQxxiw jkeAv" role="button" tabx="0"><div class="SummaryItemAssetContaer-gwhFFH VOyg summary-em__asset-ntaer"><a class="SummaryItemImageLk-dshqxb cPpCwE summary-em__image-lk summary-em-trackg__image-lk" href=" aria-hidn="te" tabx="-1" data-ponent-type="recirc-river" data-recirc-id="em-image-3" data-recirc-pattern="summary-em" target="_self"><span class="SpanWrapper-umhxW kGxnNB rponsive-asset SummaryItemRponsiveAsset-hjGIGg egpoQR summary-em__image"><div data-tt="aspect-rat-ntaer" class="AspectRatContaer-bJHpJz cCcPgL"><div class="aspect-rat--overlay-ntaer"><picture class="RponsiveImagePicture-cWuUZO dUOtEa SummaryItemRponsiveAsset-hjGIGg egpoQR summary-em__image rponsive-image"><noscript><source media="(max-width: 767px)" srcSet="" siz="100vw"/><source media="(m-width: 768px)" srcSet="" siz="100vw"/><img alt="Red, Whe & Royal Blue May Be “the Most Expensive B of Fan Fictn Ever”" class="RponsiveImageContaer-eybHBd fptoWY rponsive-image__image" src="></noscript></picture></div></div></span></a></div><div class="SummaryItemContent-eiDYMl XMZX summary-em__ntent summary-em__ntent--no-bric"><a class="SummaryItemHedLk-civM fPFrPI summary-em-trackg__hed-lk summary-em__hed-lk" data-ponent-type="recirc-river" data-recirc-id="em-hed-3" data-recirc-pattern="summary-em" href=" target="_self"><div data-ttid="ClampWrapper" class="ClampWrapper-kZxfkB hTTNGO clamp SummaryItemHedBase-hiFYpQ hRVxvR summary-em__hed"><div class="ClampContent-hilPkr jVhSBH"><div class="SummaryItemHedTag-TWblf gxaOcP" data-ttid="SummaryItemHed"><em>Red, Whe & Royal Blue</em> May Be “the Most Expensive B of Fan Fictn Ever”</div></div></div></a><div class="SummaryItemByleWrapper-boCfbi cuRXdL summary-em__byle-date-in"><div class="SummaryItemBaseByle-fFbXkY gRtaxp summary-em__byle"><div class="summary-em__byle__ntent"><div data-ttid="BylWrapper" class="BylWrapper-KIudk irTIfE byl"><p class="ByleWrapper-jWHrLH iNSiTG byle byl__byle" data-ttid="ByleWrapper" emProp="thor" emType="><span emProp="name" class="ByleNamWrapper-jbHncj fuDQVo"><span data-ttid="ByleName" class="ByleName-kwmrLn cYaBaU byle__name"><span class="BaseWrap-sc-gjQpdd BaseText-ewhhUZ BylePreamble-iJolpQ iUEiRd bIbWCO gnILss byle__preamble">By </span>Savannah Walsh</span></span></p></div></div></div></div></div></div></li><li><div class="AdWrapper-dQtivb fZrssQ RecircMostPopularSummaryItem-jQxxiw fHLKqj ad ad--asi"><div class="ad__slot ad__slot--asi" data-no-id="lyq9ew"></div></div></li></ul><div class="RecircMostPopularFooter-enPjgs eAuebe"></div></div></div></div><div class="StickyBoxPlaceholr-grPmrg dxAvXx"></div></div></div></div><div class="RowWrapper-UmqTg HEhan full-bleed-ad row-mid-ntent-ad"><div class="StickyMidContentAdWrapper-fSBzwl drzyIa ad-stickymidntent"><div class="AdWrapper-dQtivb fZrssQ ad ad--mid-ntent should-hold-space"><div class="ad__slot ad__slot--mid-ntent" data-no-id="cvmuye"></div></div></div></div><div class="GridWrapper-cAzTTK kHBDeH grid grid-margs grid-ems-2 ArticlePageChunksGrid-hfxa bjczjj grid-layout--adrail narrow wi-adrail"><div class="GridItem-buujkM stRKV grid--em grid-layout__ntent"><div class="BodyWrapper-kufPGa lnwCqV body body__ntaer article__body" data-journey-hook="client-ntent" data-ttid="BodyWrapper"><div class="body__ner-ntaer"><p class="paywall">After police qutng, Aaron McKney nfsed that he and his iend Rsell Henrson had met Matthew at the Firi Bar & Lounge on Tuday night and posed as gay to lure him to their tck. Then they drove him to an out-of-the-way lotn, bound him to a fence, pistol-whipped him, and tnted him while he begged for his life. Then they abandoned the gentle five-foot-two, 105-pound hman to hang alone for 18 hours, losg blood as the temperature dropped.</p><p class="paywall">On Friday, Doc picked up the paper and was faced wh a horrible realizatn: the gay guy Kristen had been talkg about was Matthew. Moreover, as the story broke on the ont pag of newspapers across the untry, a chillg chronology beme clear: “They found him at 6:30 on Wednday,” Doc says. “So Krissy told me this while Matt was still stng up.”</p><p class="has-dropp paywall">Although the memorial servic have passed by the time I arrive Laramie, 10 days after his ath, and the natnal prs has moved on, the tragedy reverberat everywhere, HAS MATTHEW SHEPARD’S DEATH LEFT YOU FEELING CONFUSED, ANGRY, FRIGHTENED … ? posters ask. An enormo banner at the Democratic headquarters proclaims, THOUGHTS AND PRAYERS WITH MATTHEW, bi re-electn signs for Cal Recha, the district attorney charge of prosecutg the se. Other bs announce, VIOLENCE IS NOT OUR VALUE.</p><p class="paywall">“This is a great muny: welg, open, fay-oriented—good people,” Laramie chief of police Bill Ware tells me. “People are tstg—that’s that wtern attu…. We are what Ameri ed to be. And we want to stay that way.</p><p class="paywall">“I’m not gog to get to the diversy issue,” he says, bshg asi qutns about Matthew. “That’s gog to take me a place I don’t want to be.” The chief hands me a rd wh a picture that shows him standg his uniform, one hand rtg on his clean whe police r. The back of the rd says that Chief Ware is “a proud hband, father and grandfather” who “sgs Christian gospel.”</p><div data-attr-viewport-monor="le-recirc" class="le-recirc-wrapper le-recirc-observer-target-2 viewport-monor-anchor"></div><p class="paywall">“Are you married?” he asks me. “You should move out here, fd a wboy, and have kids!”</p><p class="has-dropp paywall">While the killg has been terpreted as a sick attempt to prerve the Old Wt—to rid the town of the tr whose prence threatens tradnal life—the crime’s most strikg element is the enormy of the change this sgle act of vlence has wrought.</p><p class="paywall">“This is the nict place I’ve ever lived. There’s somethg magil here,” says Tiffany Edwards, a pretty, part-Cherokee 22-year-old who has wrten most of the Shepard verage for <em>The Laramie Daily Boomerang</em>, the town paper. “That’s part of what’s so upsettg about all this—for me personally and our town.”</p><p class="paywall">The magic is not the scenery. Unlike most of the state, Laramie is not blsed s landspe. Fifty wt of Wyomg’s pal cy, Cheyenne, ss a flat, treels sweep of high plas bised by bad weather, s mountas mostly hidn. Found 1868 as a railway town, the impoverished cy is still divid to east and wt by a eight le. Wh the ranchg dtry cle, employment here is domated by the Universy of Wyomg. About 90 percent of the populatn is whe; the median annual hoehold e is $24,080; reportedly, 20 percent of the rints live below the poverty le.</p><p class="paywall">Laramie is, however, the iendlit place I have ever been Ameri. When I arrived at the miature airport, other passengers me up and offered me a ri. Although I’m on an expense acunt durg my stay, people ok me meat loaf.</p><p class="paywall">There is a llective sorrow here: the week followg the ath, 1,000 people me to a sgle vigil on the ont lawn of the St. Pl’s Newman Catholic Universy Center. The cy uncil passed a rolutn llg “for the muny to exprs sympathy, to reflect on our loss and to beg a healg procs.”</p><p class="paywall">Mary Elizabeth Galvan, the fense lawyer for Rsell Henrson’s girliend, Chasy Pasley (who plead guilty as an accsory to murr), don’t want to ment on her client, but tears form her ey as she speaks about Matthew and his parents. “As a mother, breaks my heart. The thought of his parents on that long plane ri back om Sdi Arabia, whout even privacy, while their son was dyg the hospal.”</p><p class="paywall">Amidst the grief, there is an unrcurrent of rentment. Some townspeople feel angry that the slayg is beg “blamed” on them: they feel has been “blown out of proportn” and “ed by the gay-rights movement for polil purpos.” U.W. stunt Shelley Barton puts this way: “Everyone tak note of bee happened Wyomg, and then sudnly ’s ma to be typil of Wyomg: ‘Oh, ’s a redneck place—we expected .’”</p><p class="paywall">“It’s like spillg the pat on the clean rpet is a bigger al than spillg pat on a dirty rpet,” a lol worker is quoted as sayg the <em>Boomerang.</em> “Like this don’t happen anywhere else.”</p><p class="has-dropp paywall">Hate-crime legislatn has failed to pass Wyomg three years a row. The media’s lkage of the state’s polics and Matthew’s ath furiat many townspeople. Yet disavowals are suffed wh a sense of pable moral rponsibily and the necsy for atonement.</p><p class="paywall">Many Laramie rints scribe themselv as not homophobic. One rint explas: “We don’t have phobias—we have valu.” But people mock gay reporters sent to ver the crime. “I’m om the <em>San Francis Chronicle</em>,” they imate unselfnscly, assumg fey voic. Many people sist that homosexualy is “not for me to judge.” But when they are asked, “What’s to judge?” their answers bee nvoluted.</p><div data-attr-viewport-monor="le-recirc" class="le-recirc-wrapper le-recirc-observer-target-3 viewport-monor-anchor"></div><p class="paywall">Some people sist on makg a distctn between nmng the s and nmng the sner, separatg “the homosexual liftyle” om “the gay person.” Most people feel that Matthew Shepard did not reprent that ntemptible liftyle. A number of rints told me that they nsir Matthew Shepard the first gay person they ever “met.” And the fact that the “meetgs” took place after his ath seems to have ma them all the more signifint.</p></div></div></div><div class="GridItem-buujkM fVLMby grid--em grid-layout__asi"><div class="StickyBoxWrapper-jfYB jxBcTH sticky-box"><div class="StickyBoxPrimary-dzWDWL cdhYoN sticky-box__primary"><div class="AdWrapper-dQtivb fZrssQ ad ad--rail"><div class="ad__slot ad__slot--rail" data-no-id="1y0396"></div></div><div class="ConsumerMarketgUnThemedWrapper-iUTMTf jssHut nsumer-marketg-un nsumer-marketg-un--display-rail" role="prentatn" aria-hidn="te"><div class="nsumer-marketg-un__slot nsumer-marketg-un__slot--display-rail"></div><div class="journey-un"></div></div><div data-attr-viewport-monor="" class="RecircMostPopularWrapper-bRuGTi jkTTgR recirc-most-popular-wrapper viewport-monor-anchor"><div class="RecircMostPopularConter-jiViNn ktrplG recirc-most-popular-sparrow-trackg hi-asi-ad" 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summary-em__image"><div data-tt="aspect-rat-ntaer" class="AspectRatContaer-bJHpJz cCcPgL"><div class="aspect-rat--overlay-ntaer"><picture class="RponsiveImagePicture-cWuUZO dUOtEa SummaryItemRponsiveAsset-hjGIGg egpoQR summary-em__image rponsive-image"><noscript><source media="(max-width: 767px)" srcSet="" siz="100vw"/><source media="(m-width: 768px)" srcSet="" siz="100vw"/><img alt="Vany Fair’s “It’s Rag Teens” Cover at 20: Where Are They Now?" class="RponsiveImageContaer-eybHBd fptoWY rponsive-image__image" src="></noscript></picture></div></div></span></a></div><div class="SummaryItemContent-eiDYMl XMZX summary-em__ntent summary-em__ntent--no-bric"><a class="SummaryItemHedLk-civM fPFrPI summary-em-trackg__hed-lk summary-em__hed-lk" data-ponent-type="recirc-river" data-recirc-id="em-hed-1" data-recirc-pattern="summary-em" href=" target="_self"><div data-ttid="ClampWrapper" class="ClampWrapper-kZxfkB hTTNGO clamp SummaryItemHedBase-hiFYpQ hRVxvR summary-em__hed"><div class="ClampContent-hilPkr jVhSBH"><div class="SummaryItemHedTag-TWblf gxaOcP" data-ttid="SummaryItemHed"><em>Vany Fair</em>’s “It’s Rag Teens” Cover at 20: Where Are They Now?</div></div></div></a><div class="SummaryItemByleWrapper-boCfbi cuRXdL summary-em__byle-date-in"><div class="SummaryItemBaseByle-fFbXkY gRtaxp summary-em__byle"><div class="summary-em__byle__ntent"><div data-ttid="BylWrapper" class="BylWrapper-KIudk irTIfE byl"><p class="ByleWrapper-jWHrLH iNSiTG byle byl__byle" data-ttid="ByleWrapper" emProp="thor" emType="><span emProp="name" class="ByleNamWrapper-jbHncj fuDQVo"><span data-ttid="ByleName" class="ByleName-kwmrLn cYaBaU byle__name"><span class="BaseWrap-sc-gjQpdd BaseText-ewhhUZ BylePreamble-iJolpQ iUEiRd bIbWCO gnILss byle__preamble">By </span>Savannah Walsh</span></span></p></div></div></div></div></div></div></li><li><div class="SummaryItemWrapper-iwvBff doDafW summary-em summary-em--has-borr summary-em--ARTICLE summary-em--no-in summary-em--text-align-left 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class="summary-em__byle__ntent"><div data-ttid="BylWrapper" class="BylWrapper-KIudk irTIfE byl"><p class="ByleWrapper-jWHrLH iNSiTG byle byl__byle" data-ttid="ByleWrapper" emProp="thor" emType="><span emProp="name" class="ByleNamWrapper-jbHncj fuDQVo"><span data-ttid="ByleName" class="ByleName-kwmrLn cYaBaU byle__name"><span class="BaseWrap-sc-gjQpdd BaseText-ewhhUZ BylePreamble-iJolpQ iUEiRd bIbWCO gnILss byle__preamble">By </span>Mike Hogan</span></span></p></div></div></div></div></div></div></li><li><div class="SummaryItemWrapper-iwvBff doDafW summary-em summary-em--has-borr summary-em--ARTICLE summary-em--no-in summary-em--text-align-left summary-em--layout-placement-si-by-si summary-em--layout-posn-image-left summary-em--layout-proportns-33-66 summary-em--si-by-si-align-center summary-em--si-by-si-image-right-mobile-false summary-em--standard RecircMostPopularSummaryItem-jQxxiw jkeAv" role="button" tabx="0"><div class="SummaryItemAssetContaer-gwhFFH VOyg summary-em__asset-ntaer"><a class="SummaryItemImageLk-dshqxb cPpCwE summary-em__image-lk summary-em-trackg__image-lk" href=" aria-hidn="te" tabx="-1" data-ponent-type="recirc-river" data-recirc-id="em-image-3" data-recirc-pattern="summary-em" target="_self"><span class="SpanWrapper-umhxW kGxnNB rponsive-asset SummaryItemRponsiveAsset-hjGIGg egpoQR summary-em__image"><div data-tt="aspect-rat-ntaer" class="AspectRatContaer-bJHpJz cCcPgL"><div class="aspect-rat--overlay-ntaer"><picture class="RponsiveImagePicture-cWuUZO dUOtEa SummaryItemRponsiveAsset-hjGIGg egpoQR summary-em__image rponsive-image"><noscript><source media="(max-width: 767px)" srcSet="" siz="100vw"/><source media="(m-width: 768px)" srcSet="" siz="100vw"/><img alt="Red, Whe & Royal Blue May Be “the Most Expensive B of Fan Fictn Ever”" class="RponsiveImageContaer-eybHBd fptoWY rponsive-image__image" src="></noscript></picture></div></div></span></a></div><div class="SummaryItemContent-eiDYMl XMZX summary-em__ntent summary-em__ntent--no-bric"><a class="SummaryItemHedLk-civM fPFrPI summary-em-trackg__hed-lk summary-em__hed-lk" data-ponent-type="recirc-river" data-recirc-id="em-hed-3" data-recirc-pattern="summary-em" href=" target="_self"><div data-ttid="ClampWrapper" class="ClampWrapper-kZxfkB hTTNGO clamp SummaryItemHedBase-hiFYpQ hRVxvR summary-em__hed"><div class="ClampContent-hilPkr jVhSBH"><div class="SummaryItemHedTag-TWblf gxaOcP" data-ttid="SummaryItemHed"><em>Red, Whe & Royal Blue</em> May Be “the Most Expensive B of Fan Fictn Ever”</div></div></div></a><div class="SummaryItemByleWrapper-boCfbi cuRXdL summary-em__byle-date-in"><div class="SummaryItemBaseByle-fFbXkY gRtaxp summary-em__byle"><div class="summary-em__byle__ntent"><div data-ttid="BylWrapper" class="BylWrapper-KIudk irTIfE byl"><p class="ByleWrapper-jWHrLH iNSiTG byle byl__byle" data-ttid="ByleWrapper" emProp="thor" emType="><span emProp="name" class="ByleNamWrapper-jbHncj fuDQVo"><span data-ttid="ByleName" class="ByleName-kwmrLn cYaBaU byle__name"><span class="BaseWrap-sc-gjQpdd BaseText-ewhhUZ BylePreamble-iJolpQ iUEiRd bIbWCO gnILss byle__preamble">By </span>Savannah Walsh</span></span></p></div></div></div></div></div></div></li><li><div class="AdWrapper-dQtivb fZrssQ RecircMostPopularSummaryItem-jQxxiw fHLKqj ad ad--asi"><div class="ad__slot ad__slot--asi" data-no-id="r4v2rp"></div></div></li></ul><div class="RecircMostPopularFooter-enPjgs eAuebe"></div></div></div></div><div class="StickyBoxPlaceholr-grPmrg dxAvXx"></div></div></div></div><div class="RowWrapper-UmqTg HEhan full-bleed-ad row-mid-ntent-ad"><div class="StickyMidContentAdWrapper-fSBzwl drzyIa ad-stickymidntent"><div class="AdWrapper-dQtivb fZrssQ ad ad--mid-ntent should-hold-space"><div class="ad__slot ad__slot--mid-ntent" data-no-id="90svek"></div></div></div></div><div class="GridWrapper-cAzTTK kHBDeH grid grid-margs grid-ems-2 ArticlePageChunksGrid-hfxa bjczjj grid-layout--adrail narrow wi-adrail"><div class="GridItem-buujkM stRKV grid--em grid-layout__ntent"><div class="BodyWrapper-kufPGa lnwCqV body body__ntaer article__body" data-journey-hook="client-ntent" data-ttid="BodyWrapper"><div class="body__ner-ntaer"><p class="paywall">Milt Green, a 46-year-old U.W. extensn-service teacher who works wh Native Amerin stunts, says that he “would hope people take the time to fd out who Wyomg people really are.” He thks Matthew’s murr was “a els, stupid crime agast another human beg—I n’t support .”</p><p class="paywall">Neverthels, he adds, “bee of my value system, my background—my fay valu—I have a hard time relatg to [homosexualy]. I don’t unrstand .” He se tolerance as “a rpect issue: I have to rpect [gays] for tellg me, and they have to rpect me that I don’t unrstand where they’re g om.”</p><p class="paywall">Karla Brown, the 26-year-old manager of the Firi Bar & Lounge, says that she don’t know why “thkg about homosexualy evok such a viscerally negative rponse people … ’s almost like watchg someone eat rotten food. People are revolted by the ia.” Her own view is that “ an ial world we’d all be able to love each other, right?” But she don’t thk that’s realistic. Jt as the 1955 murr of Emmett Till (a 14-year-old black who was stripped and shot for sayg “hi” to a whe girl a ndy store) upset even racist Mississippians, the disputable barbary of the Shepard attack is makg people thk. “I’ve heard people talkg about who’ve never talked about homosexualy before,” Karla says, and surprisgly, she adds, she hasn’t “heard too many ignorant ments, which I thk shows that people are basilly cent.”</p><p class="paywall">Karla’s boyiend, Matt Mickelson, the 28-year-old owner of the Firi, plas, “Now we’re the pal of gay-bashg.” But he also says, “If you don’t feel sympathy for that kid, then you are one heartls son of a bch. This will make people more tolerant for sure. Normally you might flip someone some sh—make some off-lor ment. Now you’re gog to be more rerved about .”</p><p class="paywall">Mickelson remembers havg seen Matthew e to the bar a few tim, and n’t image he would have done anythg to provoke his ath. “As nice and pole and quiet as he was, I don’t see this kid makg random advanc,” he says. “The gay muny is rerved and rpectable here.” Mickelson adds that, like so many others, he don’t re for “some guy flamg around and half g on to you—I don’t even like when girls do that.” But Matthew “wasn’t a big parar,” and bothers Mickelson that “the media has ma him to this gay-rights msiah.”</p><p class="paywall">The bar owner nfs sheepishly that, to his surprise, he once “end up havg a gay iend. I didn’t know at the time we beme iends, but then, what are you gog to say—‘You’re not my iend anymore’?” In Mickelson’s Catholic fay he was told that “homosexualy is a meral ficiency—one step om retardatn.” He asks if I thk this is te.</p><p class="has-dropp paywall">Most of the church Laramie participated the vigils and memorial servic for Matthew; even tradnally anti-homosexualy sects, like Mormons, clud prayers for Matthew’s fay their servic. There was universal disgt at the Reverend Fred Phelps and his followers, who me om Topeka, Kansas, to prott durg Matthew’s funeral.</p><p class="paywall">Many Laramie churchgoers feel the media has taken their Christian valu—good, ordary valu—and twisted them to somethg obscene, lkg them to vlence. Jse Fisher is a 22-year-old Seventh-Day Adventist who works as a night lobby maid at the Holiday Inn. “Christiany,” she says, “is about tolerance and fivens. It hurts that [the protters] are llg themselv Christians. Church is the place that is supposed to take sners —church is the place you n go. Everyone has ss. I have ss, like I had a son out of marriage.” She thks that after his ath Matthew may have thgs to reckon for, but “maybe Matthew already ma his peace wh God—how n we know?”</p><div data-attr-viewport-monor="le-recirc" class="le-recirc-wrapper le-recirc-observer-target-4 viewport-monor-anchor"></div><p class="paywall">For members of the gay muny Laramie, however, the killg has a different meang. Gayle Woodsum says that gay people the Wt get the msage: “You n be who you want to, but don’t tell what is.” For her, “Matthew’s ath is a wake-up ll that if you tell—if you slip up—we might not let you live.”</p></div></div></div><div class="GridItem-buujkM fVLMby grid--em grid-layout__asi"><div class="StickyBoxWrapper-jfYB jxBcTH sticky-box"><div class="StickyBoxPrimary-dzWDWL cdhYoN sticky-box__primary"><div class="AdWrapper-dQtivb fZrssQ ad ad--rail"><div class="ad__slot ad__slot--rail" data-no-id="411hnd"></div></div><div class="ConsumerMarketgUnThemedWrapper-iUTMTf jssHut nsumer-marketg-un nsumer-marketg-un--display-rail" role="prentatn" aria-hidn="te"><div class="nsumer-marketg-un__slot nsumer-marketg-un__slot--display-rail"></div><div class="journey-un"></div></div><div data-attr-viewport-monor="" class="RecircMostPopularWrapper-bRuGTi jkTTgR recirc-most-popular-wrapper viewport-monor-anchor"><div class="RecircMostPopularConter-jiViNn ktrplG recirc-most-popular-sparrow-trackg 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class="ClampContent-hilPkr jVhSBH"><div class="SummaryItemHedTag-TWblf gxaOcP" data-ttid="SummaryItemHed"><em>Vany Fair</em>’s “It’s Rag Teens” Cover at 20: Where Are They Now?</div></div></div></a><div class="SummaryItemByleWrapper-boCfbi cuRXdL summary-em__byle-date-in"><div class="SummaryItemBaseByle-fFbXkY gRtaxp summary-em__byle"><div class="summary-em__byle__ntent"><div data-ttid="BylWrapper" class="BylWrapper-KIudk irTIfE byl"><p class="ByleWrapper-jWHrLH iNSiTG byle byl__byle" data-ttid="ByleWrapper" emProp="thor" emType="><span emProp="name" class="ByleNamWrapper-jbHncj fuDQVo"><span data-ttid="ByleName" class="ByleName-kwmrLn cYaBaU byle__name"><span class="BaseWrap-sc-gjQpdd BaseText-ewhhUZ BylePreamble-iJolpQ iUEiRd bIbWCO gnILss byle__preamble">By </span>Savannah Walsh</span></span></p></div></div></div></div></div></div></li><li><div class="SummaryItemWrapper-iwvBff doDafW summary-em summary-em--has-borr summary-em--ARTICLE summary-em--no-in summary-em--text-align-left 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class="summary-em__byle__ntent"><div data-ttid="BylWrapper" class="BylWrapper-KIudk irTIfE byl"><p class="ByleWrapper-jWHrLH iNSiTG byle byl__byle" data-ttid="ByleWrapper" emProp="thor" emType="><span emProp="name" class="ByleNamWrapper-jbHncj fuDQVo"><span data-ttid="ByleName" class="ByleName-kwmrLn cYaBaU byle__name"><span class="BaseWrap-sc-gjQpdd BaseText-ewhhUZ BylePreamble-iJolpQ iUEiRd bIbWCO gnILss byle__preamble">By </span>Mike Hogan</span></span></p></div></div></div></div></div></div></li><li><div class="SummaryItemWrapper-iwvBff doDafW summary-em summary-em--has-borr summary-em--ARTICLE summary-em--no-in summary-em--text-align-left summary-em--layout-placement-si-by-si summary-em--layout-posn-image-left summary-em--layout-proportns-33-66 summary-em--si-by-si-align-center summary-em--si-by-si-image-right-mobile-false summary-em--standard RecircMostPopularSummaryItem-jQxxiw jkeAv" role="button" tabx="0"><div class="SummaryItemAssetContaer-gwhFFH VOyg 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summary-em__ntent--no-bric"><a class="SummaryItemHedLk-civM fPFrPI summary-em-trackg__hed-lk summary-em__hed-lk" data-ponent-type="recirc-river" data-recirc-id="em-hed-3" data-recirc-pattern="summary-em" href=" target="_self"><div data-ttid="ClampWrapper" class="ClampWrapper-kZxfkB hTTNGO clamp SummaryItemHedBase-hiFYpQ hRVxvR summary-em__hed"><div class="ClampContent-hilPkr jVhSBH"><div class="SummaryItemHedTag-TWblf gxaOcP" data-ttid="SummaryItemHed"><em>Red, Whe & Royal Blue</em> May Be “the Most Expensive B of Fan Fictn Ever”</div></div></div></a><div class="SummaryItemByleWrapper-boCfbi cuRXdL summary-em__byle-date-in"><div class="SummaryItemBaseByle-fFbXkY gRtaxp summary-em__byle"><div class="summary-em__byle__ntent"><div data-ttid="BylWrapper" class="BylWrapper-KIudk irTIfE byl"><p class="ByleWrapper-jWHrLH iNSiTG byle byl__byle" data-ttid="ByleWrapper" emProp="thor" emType="><span emProp="name" class="ByleNamWrapper-jbHncj fuDQVo"><span data-ttid="ByleName" class="ByleName-kwmrLn cYaBaU byle__name"><span class="BaseWrap-sc-gjQpdd BaseText-ewhhUZ BylePreamble-iJolpQ iUEiRd bIbWCO gnILss byle__preamble">By </span>Savannah Walsh</span></span></p></div></div></div></div></div></div></li><li><div class="AdWrapper-dQtivb fZrssQ RecircMostPopularSummaryItem-jQxxiw fHLKqj ad ad--asi"><div class="ad__slot ad__slot--asi" data-no-id="epvo"></div></div></li></ul><div class="RecircMostPopularFooter-enPjgs eAuebe"></div></div></div></div><div class="StickyBoxPlaceholr-grPmrg dxAvXx"></div></div></div></div><div class="RowWrapper-UmqTg HEhan full-bleed-ad row-mid-ntent-ad"><div class="StickyMidContentAdWrapper-fSBzwl drzyIa ad-stickymidntent"><div class="AdWrapper-dQtivb fZrssQ ad ad--mid-ntent should-hold-space"><div class="ad__slot ad__slot--mid-ntent" data-no-id="8i668k"></div></div></div></div><div class="GridWrapper-cAzTTK kHBDeH grid grid-margs grid-ems-2 ArticlePageChunksGrid-hfxa bjczjj grid-layout--adrail narrow wi-adrail"><div class="GridItem-buujkM stRKV grid--em grid-layout__ntent"><div class="BodyWrapper-kufPGa lnwCqV body body__ntaer article__body" data-journey-hook="client-ntent" data-ttid="BodyWrapper"><div class="body__ner-ntaer"><p class="paywall">At precisely this time, when she and other gay people feel the most unsafe, they are faced wh an obligatn to speak out about Matthew’s ath—some publicly g forward as gay for the first time. “When I heard, I jt wanted to go back to the closet,” Meha Fenimore, a iend of Matthew’s and a fellow member of U.W.’s Lbian, Gay, Bisexual and Trans-genred Associatn (L.G.B.T.A.), says.</p><p class="paywall">Gayle Woodsum was stck by what she regard as a revealg typo that appeared a ont-page article the <em>Boomerang</em> about Matthew’s ath: “A homoci is a homoci.” At Matthew’s memorial service at the Unarian church, Gayle stood up and told people that they had to “keep an eye on the law-enforcement people. This is a very homophobic system.”</p><p class="paywall">“Speakg about the murr brought up this tense fear,” she tells me, “but ’s fear of what they’ve already done to me.” When Gayle head the Albany County Crime Victim Wns Program for two years, she heard gay-bashg jok and, she alleg, read memos stctg law-enforcement officials on how to file domtic-abe charg so that allegedly abive men uld keep their guns.</p><p class="paywall">When someone outed Gayle to the district attorney’s office, she was shunned, she says, and then fired whout explanatn—by the same men who have now been entsted wh prosecutg Matthew’s alleged murrers. (In the <em>Boomerang</em>, the D.A. nied that Woodsum was fired bee of her sexual orientatn.)</p><p class="paywall">The roner, Julie Heggie, says, “I fely know that people Laramie are very homophobic—I know that. I’ve lived Laramie most of my life. It’s very sry. It was horrible to see his body—and I al wh ath on a daily basis. This is gog to affect even the roner’s office.” She adds, as if tryg to talk herself to , “But if chang 10 people’s attus, ’s a good thg.”</p><p class="has-dropp paywall">Although the sectn where Matthew was bound has been taken as evince by the police, the fence has bee a place of pilgrimage. Barren and betiful beneath the snow-dted Rocki, the se njur thoughts of Golgotha. Small yellow ston have been arranged to form a cross; every crevice of the fence are bouquets, not, stray tokens. Tiffany Edwards brought a tigereye stone; the day she and I vis she is disturbed to fd gone, along wh other offergs she rells, such as a pair of bber medil glov that were said to have touched Matthew’s body.</p><p class="paywall">“I brought the tigereye,” says Tiffany, “to brg sight and clary, to see the whole picture, to unrstand Matthew—his pa and terror and what his life was—to envisn him there and be O.K. about .”</p><p class="has-dropp paywall">Matthew “me to this world prematurely and he left prematurely,” a prs release om his parents, Dennis and Judy Shepard, reads. An earlier statement said that his “life has often been a stggle one way or another,” cludg many childhood ailments. “We know that he thks if he n make one person’s life better this world, then he has succeed. That is a measure of succs Matthew has always pursued.”</p><p class="paywall">The mythologizg of Matthew—his overnight transformatn to a natnal and ternatnal symbol—has left him oddly facels. No one has seemed terted publishg the tails of his life—as if they would tract om his martyrdom. But py is not unrstandg, and Matthew’s sorrow did not beg at the fence.</p><div data-attr-viewport-monor="le-recirc" class="le-recirc-wrapper le-recirc-observer-target-5 viewport-monor-anchor"></div><p class="paywall">“He had emotnal srs—he had faced this kd of attack throughout his life,” his iend Romae Patterson says. “He was a perpetual victim. That’s how he beme the person that he was.” The prs was reful to portray Matthew as a special person who “happened” to be gay. In fact the two quali were eply ternnected. “In some way he was special <em>bee</em> he was gay,” Judy Shepard tells me, “bee he had always been different and that difference ma him bee more thoughtful, sensive, and empathetic.” But “Matthew wasn’t openly gay,” his mother says. “He was hontly gay. He didn’t go around wh a sign on—for one thg, he was aaid.”</p><p class="paywall">As well as sufferg through a seri of mor cints throughout his life, durg his senr year high school Matthew had been the target of a vic attack Moroc. “He had the posture of a victim,” Judy says. “He was the kd of person whom you jt look at and know if you hurt him that he’s gog to take —that there’s nothg he n do about , verbally or physilly. When he walked down the street he had that victim walk,” she says. “But if he was an arena he knew about, like polics, he uld she wh self-nfince.”</p><p class="paywall">As a child growg up the small town of Casper, Wyomg, Matthew had always preferred the pany of adults. He was iendly wh all his classmat, “but he never had a bt iend,” his mother rells, and she believ he need that. “I thk he always felt out of place.” He was teased for beg small and unathletic. He was fascated by polics: Gloria Ngen, the fay hairdrser, rells how, when Matthew was the send gra, “he me to our shop and told all how to vote [ the lol electn]—and he knew. He knew the issu. We all thought he was gog to grow up to be print.”</p><p class="paywall">After Matthew’s sophomore year high school, the fay moved to Dhahran, Sdi Arabia, where his father was employed as an oil safety engeer. Bee there was no Amerin high school there, Matthew was sent to the Amerin School Swzerland—a progrsive school where he studied German and Italian and was volved theater. “He was a snappy drser,” his mother rells. “He liked untry, techno mic, and neo-swg bands like the Squirrel Nut Zippers. He was a good dancer and often went to clubs.”</p><p class="paywall">After graduatn, he attempted to figure out where to go. “He had a real rtls, searchg qualy,” Judy says. He briefly attend Catawba College Salisbury, North Carola, and then Casper College, where a teacher troduced him to Romae Patterson, an outgog lbian at the center of a social circle. “He was lookg for a gay muny and we took him ,” Romae says. When she moved to Denver a few months later, he followed. He worked for a ltle while a telemarketg job, sellg vams, and then qu. Romae was a wars at a ffee shop, where he went and hung out for a uple of hours most days.</p></div></div></div><div class="GridItem-buujkM fVLMby grid--em grid-layout__asi"><div class="StickyBoxWrapper-jfYB jxBcTH sticky-box"><div class="StickyBoxPrimary-dzWDWL cdhYoN sticky-box__primary"><div class="AdWrapper-dQtivb fZrssQ ad ad--rail"><div class="ad__slot ad__slot--rail" data-no-id="qam2yb"></div></div><div class="ConsumerMarketgUnThemedWrapper-iUTMTf jssHut nsumer-marketg-un nsumer-marketg-un--display-rail" role="prentatn" aria-hidn="te"><div class="nsumer-marketg-un__slot nsumer-marketg-un__slot--display-rail"></div><div class="journey-un"></div></div><div data-attr-viewport-monor="" class="RecircMostPopularWrapper-bRuGTi jkTTgR recirc-most-popular-wrapper viewport-monor-anchor"><div class="RecircMostPopularConter-jiViNn ktrplG recirc-most-popular-sparrow-trackg hi-asi-ad" data-most-popular-id="mod-most-popular-1111"><div class="RecircMostPopularHeadg-iVzhzt hBHzvB">Most 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data-ttid="SummaryItemHed"><em>Vany Fair</em>’s “It’s Rag Teens” Cover at 20: Where Are They Now?</div></div></div></a><div class="SummaryItemByleWrapper-boCfbi cuRXdL summary-em__byle-date-in"><div class="SummaryItemBaseByle-fFbXkY gRtaxp summary-em__byle"><div class="summary-em__byle__ntent"><div data-ttid="BylWrapper" class="BylWrapper-KIudk irTIfE byl"><p class="ByleWrapper-jWHrLH iNSiTG byle byl__byle" data-ttid="ByleWrapper" emProp="thor" emType="><span emProp="name" class="ByleNamWrapper-jbHncj fuDQVo"><span data-ttid="ByleName" class="ByleName-kwmrLn cYaBaU byle__name"><span class="BaseWrap-sc-gjQpdd BaseText-ewhhUZ BylePreamble-iJolpQ iUEiRd bIbWCO gnILss byle__preamble">By </span>Savannah Walsh</span></span></p></div></div></div></div></div></div></li><li><div class="SummaryItemWrapper-iwvBff doDafW summary-em summary-em--has-borr summary-em--ARTICLE summary-em--no-in summary-em--text-align-left summary-em--layout-placement-si-by-si summary-em--layout-posn-image-left summary-em--layout-proportns-33-66 summary-em--si-by-si-align-center summary-em--si-by-si-image-right-mobile-false summary-em--standard RecircMostPopularSummaryItem-jQxxiw jkeAv" role="button" tabx="0"><div class="SummaryItemAssetContaer-gwhFFH VOyg summary-em__asset-ntaer"><a class="SummaryItemImageLk-dshqxb cPpCwE summary-em__image-lk summary-em-trackg__image-lk" href=" aria-hidn="te" tabx="-1" data-ponent-type="recirc-river" data-recirc-id="em-image-2" data-recirc-pattern="summary-em" target="_self"><span class="SpanWrapper-umhxW kGxnNB rponsive-asset SummaryItemRponsiveAsset-hjGIGg egpoQR summary-em__image"><div data-tt="aspect-rat-ntaer" class="AspectRatContaer-bJHpJz cCcPgL"><div class="aspect-rat--overlay-ntaer"><picture class="RponsiveImagePicture-cWuUZO dUOtEa SummaryItemRponsiveAsset-hjGIGg egpoQR summary-em__image rponsive-image"><noscript><source media="(max-width: 767px)" srcSet="" siz="100vw"/><source media="(m-width: 768px)" srcSet="" siz="100vw"/><img alt="Rememberg Séad O’Connor’s Sublime Mic and Righteo Rage" class="RponsiveImageContaer-eybHBd fptoWY rponsive-image__image" src="></noscript></picture></div></div></span></a></div><div class="SummaryItemContent-eiDYMl XMZX summary-em__ntent summary-em__ntent--no-bric"><a class="SummaryItemHedLk-civM fPFrPI summary-em-trackg__hed-lk summary-em__hed-lk" data-ponent-type="recirc-river" data-recirc-id="em-hed-2" data-recirc-pattern="summary-em" href=" target="_self"><div data-ttid="ClampWrapper" class="ClampWrapper-kZxfkB hTTNGO clamp SummaryItemHedBase-hiFYpQ hRVxvR summary-em__hed"><div class="ClampContent-hilPkr jVhSBH"><div class="SummaryItemHedTag-TWblf gxaOcP" data-ttid="SummaryItemHed">Rememberg Séad O’Connor’s Sublime Mic and Righteo Rage</div></div></div></a><div class="SummaryItemByleWrapper-boCfbi cuRXdL summary-em__byle-date-in"><div class="SummaryItemBaseByle-fFbXkY gRtaxp summary-em__byle"><div class="summary-em__byle__ntent"><div data-ttid="BylWrapper" class="BylWrapper-KIudk irTIfE 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summary-em-trackg__image-lk" href=" aria-hidn="te" tabx="-1" data-ponent-type="recirc-river" data-recirc-id="em-image-3" data-recirc-pattern="summary-em" target="_self"><span class="SpanWrapper-umhxW kGxnNB rponsive-asset SummaryItemRponsiveAsset-hjGIGg egpoQR summary-em__image"><div data-tt="aspect-rat-ntaer" class="AspectRatContaer-bJHpJz cCcPgL"><div class="aspect-rat--overlay-ntaer"><picture class="RponsiveImagePicture-cWuUZO dUOtEa SummaryItemRponsiveAsset-hjGIGg egpoQR summary-em__image rponsive-image"><noscript><source media="(max-width: 767px)" srcSet="" siz="100vw"/><source media="(m-width: 768px)" srcSet="" siz="100vw"/><img alt="Red, Whe & Royal Blue May Be “the Most Expensive B of Fan Fictn Ever”" class="RponsiveImageContaer-eybHBd fptoWY rponsive-image__image" src="></noscript></picture></div></div></span></a></div><div class="SummaryItemContent-eiDYMl XMZX summary-em__ntent summary-em__ntent--no-bric"><a class="SummaryItemHedLk-civM fPFrPI summary-em-trackg__hed-lk summary-em__hed-lk" data-ponent-type="recirc-river" data-recirc-id="em-hed-3" data-recirc-pattern="summary-em" href=" target="_self"><div data-ttid="ClampWrapper" class="ClampWrapper-kZxfkB hTTNGO clamp SummaryItemHedBase-hiFYpQ hRVxvR summary-em__hed"><div class="ClampContent-hilPkr jVhSBH"><div class="SummaryItemHedTag-TWblf gxaOcP" data-ttid="SummaryItemHed"><em>Red, Whe & Royal Blue</em> May Be “the Most Expensive B of Fan Fictn Ever”</div></div></div></a><div class="SummaryItemByleWrapper-boCfbi cuRXdL summary-em__byle-date-in"><div class="SummaryItemBaseByle-fFbXkY gRtaxp summary-em__byle"><div class="summary-em__byle__ntent"><div data-ttid="BylWrapper" class="BylWrapper-KIudk irTIfE byl"><p class="ByleWrapper-jWHrLH iNSiTG byle byl__byle" data-ttid="ByleWrapper" emProp="thor" emType="><span emProp="name" class="ByleNamWrapper-jbHncj fuDQVo"><span data-ttid="ByleName" class="ByleName-kwmrLn cYaBaU byle__name"><span class="BaseWrap-sc-gjQpdd BaseText-ewhhUZ BylePreamble-iJolpQ iUEiRd bIbWCO gnILss byle__preamble">By </span>Savannah Walsh</span></span></p></div></div></div></div></div></div></li><li><div class="AdWrapper-dQtivb fZrssQ RecircMostPopularSummaryItem-jQxxiw fHLKqj ad ad--asi"><div class="ad__slot ad__slot--asi" data-no-id="pahntq"></div></div></li></ul><div class="RecircMostPopularFooter-enPjgs eAuebe"></div></div></div></div><div class="StickyBoxPlaceholr-grPmrg dxAvXx"></div></div></div></div><div class="RowWrapper-UmqTg HEhan full-bleed-ad row-mid-ntent-ad"><div class="StickyMidContentAdWrapper-fSBzwl drzyIa ad-stickymidntent"><div class="AdWrapper-dQtivb fZrssQ ad ad--mid-ntent should-hold-space"><div class="ad__slot ad__slot--mid-ntent" data-no-id="pvemm"></div></div></div></div><div class="GridWrapper-cAzTTK kHBDeH grid grid-margs grid-ems-2 ArticlePageChunksGrid-hfxa bjczjj grid-layout--adrail narrow wi-adrail"><div class="GridItem-buujkM stRKV grid--em grid-layout__ntent"><div class="BodyWrapper-kufPGa lnwCqV body body__ntaer article__body" data-journey-hook="client-ntent" data-ttid="BodyWrapper"><div class="body__ner-ntaer"><p class="paywall">“He’d s down and have the great nversatns wh strangers,” Romae rells. “His foc was to help people who are ls fortunate. He ma iends wh a homels man, and he’d take him to lunch once a week.”</p><p class="has-dropp paywall">Matthew suffered om perdic clil prsn and looked to livg Karis Communy, a Denver assisted-livg home n by mental-health profsnals, but he cid stead that he would move to Laramie and attend U.W., his parents’ alma mater. He felt that livg a small town would supply some of the same sense of muny, and that, as his mother says, “he’d feel safer there.”</p><p class="paywall">Although he didn’t e out until after graduatg om high school, Matthew knew he was gay om an early age. He told his iend Ta Labrie how, durg puberty, he had looked at some girlie magaz wh a group of iends. “He said he was cur to see women’s bodi, too, but he uld tell that his iends were feelg somethg different—they were attracted and exced some way he wasn’t. And then he noticed that when he looked at pictur of guys he had that same feelg.”</p><p class="paywall">He stggled wh how to e out to his parents. Romae, who grew up the ty muny of Tongue River, Wyomg, says that “when you e om Wyomg, parents haven’t had that tn.” They need to be “faiarized wh someone who is gay.”</p><div data-attr-viewport-monor="le-recirc" class="le-recirc-wrapper le-recirc-observer-target-6 viewport-monor-anchor"></div><p class="paywall">Matthew’s iend Brian Goon says, “His mom tried to be supportive, but she still had some misunrstandgs, some hop was jt a phase he was gog through. He sperately wanted acceptance and unrstandg om his parents. I thk he believed ep down that his parents would e round, but was takg more time than he wanted to.” Brian rells how Matthew “tried to drop hts to his parents that he was gay for a long time before he told them. Once when he was home he left a gay magaze out on the ffee table, but they put on his bed whout sayg anythg.”</p><p class="paywall">“That’s absurd—I knew he was gay all along,” Judy tells me. She don’t remember the cint, she says, but if she didn’t say anythg was bee she wasn’t surprised. When Matthew fally lled her om North Carola 1995 to tell her he was gay, she reassured him she had known for years. She knew om the way he rpond when girls got csh on him, as they often did, bee he was iendly and kd and treated them better than other boys did. She knew through what Matthew termed “gaydar”—the myster way which sexualy is sometim succsfully munited and unrstood—and she knew bee Matthew, like most people, wanted and need to reveal his te self.</p><p class="paywall">Judy Shepard never believed that Matthew had a choice about his sexual orientatn. “He said he didn’t choose to be gay—nobody would choose to be gay. It’s a very hard life: you’re lonely, you’re sred, you’re discrimated agast. He was searchg for a way to be happy wh . He was worried we’d be embarrassed or ashamed. I told him to qu puttg words my mouth. He would feel guilty, an extra burn, but he knew we would be there for him no matter what. There was never any qutn of that.”</p><p class="paywall">It was more difficult for Matthew to tell his father, whom he had always looked up to. “He and Dennis danced around for a year,” his mother rells. “It was a guy thg. Dennis would say to me, ‘Why don’t he tell me?’ Maybe retrospect this wasn’t the right cisn, but Dennis didn’t want to ask him before Matt was ready to tell him. Matt ma so much worse by buildg up his md and g himself all that anxiety. This was one of his real flaws. He would vent a scenar and would be the worst possible scenar. The thg that hurt Dennis the most about was Matt’s reluctance to nfi him.</p><p class="paywall">“As a parent of a gay child you feel a profound sense of loss that they’re not gog to ntue tradnal fay life—the dghter--law, the big weddg,” Judy says. “But long before he told , we had already gone through that procs. We felt he was our son and we loved him, and you don’t give that up bee your life is not what you thought was gog to be.”</p><p class="has-dropp paywall">At U.W., Matthew cid to ncentrate polil science wh a mor languag. Ta Labrie, a married anthropology major whom he met at a summer piic, quickly beme his clost iend; he f to Ta’s fay—takg to her hband and beg the idol of her small children. She rpond to his warmth and vulnerabily: “Whenever he learned of someone sufferg, affected him personally,” she says. She rells a time when they went to a matee of <em>Savg Private Ryan:</em> “He was so sensive to see the vlence and bloodshed he broke down and cried—afterwards he had to go home and take a nap and take a shower. Then he me back for dner and said he felt a ltle better.”</p><p class="paywall">Ta was touched by the way Matthew would sometim solic her opn on his cloth, askg, “Do this make me look like too much of a fag?” She says, “Makg a posive first imprsn was very important to him.” She remembers how he once gave her a bottle of apple juice to open. When she easily twisted the top off, “he said, ‘Great, there go whatever ltle b of masculy I have.’ The look on his face was so cute, pouty but jokg at the same time.” He was close to his younger brother, Logan, she rells, om whom he got “hand-me-up” clothg. “It was very important to [Matthew] to be a good role mol to [Logan],” Ta says. Matthew was exced that Logan was gog to e to Laramie the next summer, and possibly attend U.W.</p><p class="paywall">She was pleased when he told her that her hband, Phil, “was the first straight guy he ever felt wasn’t aaid of him. He asked me, ‘Have you ever had a fake hug? Straight guys hug as if they’re aaid beg gay is ntag and they’d tch .’ He said he’d never h on a straight man, even if he was attracted—he jt wanted to be iends wh them.” Matthew told her that before the bar cint Cody he had been asslted and raped Moroc. He asked her, however, not to tell Phil, bee he was aaid Phil would disapprove of him.</p><p class="has-dropp paywall">Durg his senr year high school, Matthew and three classmat had gone to Moroc. Unable to sleep one night, Matthew had gotten up and walked to a nearby ffeehoe, where he chatted wh a group of German exchange stunts. On the way home, a gang of lols acsted him, raped him six tim, and took his sho.</p><p class="paywall">He worked wh the Morocn police to tch the perpetrators, to no avail. But as he often did, Matthew spired passn his troubl. “The police uld have been awful, but they weren’t,” Judy says. One of them gave him a gift of a picture of a Morocn on horseback, a gture which touched Matthew. After the rape, Matthew stayed wh his parents Sdi Arabia for a while and unrwent therapy, but he ntued to suffer anxiety, flashbacks, and nightmar, om which he was unable to ee himself.</p></div></div></div><div class="GridItem-buujkM fVLMby grid--em grid-layout__asi"><div class="StickyBoxWrapper-jfYB jxBcTH sticky-box"><div class="StickyBoxPrimary-dzWDWL cdhYoN sticky-box__primary"><div class="AdWrapper-dQtivb fZrssQ ad ad--rail"><div class="ad__slot ad__slot--rail" data-no-id="26zlbp"></div></div><div class="ConsumerMarketgUnThemedWrapper-iUTMTf jssHut nsumer-marketg-un nsumer-marketg-un--display-rail" role="prentatn" aria-hidn="te"><div class="nsumer-marketg-un__slot nsumer-marketg-un__slot--display-rail"></div><div class="journey-un"></div></div><div data-attr-viewport-monor="" class="RecircMostPopularWrapper-bRuGTi jkTTgR recirc-most-popular-wrapper viewport-monor-anchor"><div class="RecircMostPopularConter-jiViNn ktrplG recirc-most-popular-sparrow-trackg hi-asi-ad" 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summary-em__image"><div data-tt="aspect-rat-ntaer" class="AspectRatContaer-bJHpJz cCcPgL"><div class="aspect-rat--overlay-ntaer"><picture class="RponsiveImagePicture-cWuUZO dUOtEa SummaryItemRponsiveAsset-hjGIGg egpoQR summary-em__image rponsive-image"><noscript><source media="(max-width: 767px)" srcSet="" siz="100vw"/><source media="(m-width: 768px)" srcSet="" siz="100vw"/><img alt="Vany Fair’s “It’s Rag Teens” Cover at 20: Where Are They Now?" class="RponsiveImageContaer-eybHBd fptoWY rponsive-image__image" src="></noscript></picture></div></div></span></a></div><div class="SummaryItemContent-eiDYMl XMZX summary-em__ntent summary-em__ntent--no-bric"><a class="SummaryItemHedLk-civM fPFrPI summary-em-trackg__hed-lk summary-em__hed-lk" data-ponent-type="recirc-river" data-recirc-id="em-hed-1" data-recirc-pattern="summary-em" href=" target="_self"><div data-ttid="ClampWrapper" class="ClampWrapper-kZxfkB hTTNGO clamp SummaryItemHedBase-hiFYpQ hRVxvR summary-em__hed"><div class="ClampContent-hilPkr jVhSBH"><div class="SummaryItemHedTag-TWblf gxaOcP" data-ttid="SummaryItemHed"><em>Vany Fair</em>’s “It’s Rag Teens” Cover at 20: Where Are They Now?</div></div></div></a><div class="SummaryItemByleWrapper-boCfbi cuRXdL summary-em__byle-date-in"><div class="SummaryItemBaseByle-fFbXkY gRtaxp summary-em__byle"><div class="summary-em__byle__ntent"><div data-ttid="BylWrapper" class="BylWrapper-KIudk irTIfE byl"><p class="ByleWrapper-jWHrLH iNSiTG byle byl__byle" data-ttid="ByleWrapper" emProp="thor" emType="><span emProp="name" class="ByleNamWrapper-jbHncj fuDQVo"><span data-ttid="ByleName" class="ByleName-kwmrLn cYaBaU byle__name"><span class="BaseWrap-sc-gjQpdd BaseText-ewhhUZ BylePreamble-iJolpQ iUEiRd bIbWCO gnILss byle__preamble">By </span>Savannah Walsh</span></span></p></div></div></div></div></div></div></li><li><div class="SummaryItemWrapper-iwvBff doDafW summary-em summary-em--has-borr summary-em--ARTICLE summary-em--no-in summary-em--text-align-left summary-em--layout-placement-si-by-si summary-em--layout-posn-image-left summary-em--layout-proportns-33-66 summary-em--si-by-si-align-center summary-em--si-by-si-image-right-mobile-false summary-em--standard RecircMostPopularSummaryItem-jQxxiw jkeAv" role="button" tabx="0"><div class="SummaryItemAssetContaer-gwhFFH VOyg summary-em__asset-ntaer"><a class="SummaryItemImageLk-dshqxb cPpCwE summary-em__image-lk summary-em-trackg__image-lk" href=" aria-hidn="te" tabx="-1" data-ponent-type="recirc-river" data-recirc-id="em-image-2" data-recirc-pattern="summary-em" target="_self"><span class="SpanWrapper-umhxW kGxnNB rponsive-asset SummaryItemRponsiveAsset-hjGIGg egpoQR summary-em__image"><div data-tt="aspect-rat-ntaer" class="AspectRatContaer-bJHpJz cCcPgL"><div class="aspect-rat--overlay-ntaer"><picture class="RponsiveImagePicture-cWuUZO dUOtEa SummaryItemRponsiveAsset-hjGIGg egpoQR summary-em__image rponsive-image"><noscript><source media="(max-width: 767px)" srcSet="" siz="100vw"/><source media="(m-width: 768px)" srcSet="" siz="100vw"/><img alt="Rememberg Séad O’Connor’s Sublime Mic and Righteo Rage" class="RponsiveImageContaer-eybHBd fptoWY rponsive-image__image" src="></noscript></picture></div></div></span></a></div><div class="SummaryItemContent-eiDYMl XMZX summary-em__ntent summary-em__ntent--no-bric"><a class="SummaryItemHedLk-civM fPFrPI summary-em-trackg__hed-lk summary-em__hed-lk" data-ponent-type="recirc-river" data-recirc-id="em-hed-2" data-recirc-pattern="summary-em" href=" target="_self"><div data-ttid="ClampWrapper" class="ClampWrapper-kZxfkB hTTNGO clamp SummaryItemHedBase-hiFYpQ hRVxvR summary-em__hed"><div class="ClampContent-hilPkr jVhSBH"><div class="SummaryItemHedTag-TWblf gxaOcP" data-ttid="SummaryItemHed">Rememberg Séad O’Connor’s Sublime Mic and Righteo Rage</div></div></div></a><div class="SummaryItemByleWrapper-boCfbi cuRXdL summary-em__byle-date-in"><div class="SummaryItemBaseByle-fFbXkY gRtaxp summary-em__byle"><div class="summary-em__byle__ntent"><div data-ttid="BylWrapper" class="BylWrapper-KIudk irTIfE byl"><p class="ByleWrapper-jWHrLH iNSiTG byle byl__byle" data-ttid="ByleWrapper" emProp="thor" emType="><span emProp="name" class="ByleNamWrapper-jbHncj fuDQVo"><span data-ttid="ByleName" class="ByleName-kwmrLn cYaBaU byle__name"><span class="BaseWrap-sc-gjQpdd BaseText-ewhhUZ BylePreamble-iJolpQ iUEiRd bIbWCO gnILss byle__preamble">By </span>Mike Hogan</span></span></p></div></div></div></div></div></div></li><li><div class="SummaryItemWrapper-iwvBff doDafW summary-em summary-em--has-borr summary-em--ARTICLE summary-em--no-in summary-em--text-align-left summary-em--layout-placement-si-by-si summary-em--layout-posn-image-left summary-em--layout-proportns-33-66 summary-em--si-by-si-align-center summary-em--si-by-si-image-right-mobile-false summary-em--standard RecircMostPopularSummaryItem-jQxxiw jkeAv" role="button" tabx="0"><div class="SummaryItemAssetContaer-gwhFFH VOyg summary-em__asset-ntaer"><a class="SummaryItemImageLk-dshqxb cPpCwE summary-em__image-lk summary-em-trackg__image-lk" href=" aria-hidn="te" tabx="-1" data-ponent-type="recirc-river" data-recirc-id="em-image-3" data-recirc-pattern="summary-em" target="_self"><span class="SpanWrapper-umhxW kGxnNB rponsive-asset SummaryItemRponsiveAsset-hjGIGg egpoQR summary-em__image"><div data-tt="aspect-rat-ntaer" class="AspectRatContaer-bJHpJz cCcPgL"><div class="aspect-rat--overlay-ntaer"><picture class="RponsiveImagePicture-cWuUZO dUOtEa SummaryItemRponsiveAsset-hjGIGg egpoQR summary-em__image rponsive-image"><noscript><source media="(max-width: 767px)" srcSet="" siz="100vw"/><source media="(m-width: 768px)" srcSet="" siz="100vw"/><img alt="Red, Whe & Royal Blue May Be “the Most Expensive B of Fan Fictn Ever”" class="RponsiveImageContaer-eybHBd fptoWY rponsive-image__image" src="></noscript></picture></div></div></span></a></div><div class="SummaryItemContent-eiDYMl XMZX summary-em__ntent summary-em__ntent--no-bric"><a class="SummaryItemHedLk-civM fPFrPI summary-em-trackg__hed-lk summary-em__hed-lk" data-ponent-type="recirc-river" data-recirc-id="em-hed-3" data-recirc-pattern="summary-em" href=" target="_self"><div data-ttid="ClampWrapper" class="ClampWrapper-kZxfkB hTTNGO clamp SummaryItemHedBase-hiFYpQ hRVxvR summary-em__hed"><div class="ClampContent-hilPkr jVhSBH"><div class="SummaryItemHedTag-TWblf gxaOcP" data-ttid="SummaryItemHed"><em>Red, Whe & Royal Blue</em> May Be “the Most Expensive B of Fan Fictn Ever”</div></div></div></a><div class="SummaryItemByleWrapper-boCfbi cuRXdL summary-em__byle-date-in"><div class="SummaryItemBaseByle-fFbXkY gRtaxp summary-em__byle"><div class="summary-em__byle__ntent"><div data-ttid="BylWrapper" class="BylWrapper-KIudk irTIfE byl"><p class="ByleWrapper-jWHrLH iNSiTG byle byl__byle" data-ttid="ByleWrapper" emProp="thor" emType="><span emProp="name" class="ByleNamWrapper-jbHncj fuDQVo"><span data-ttid="ByleName" class="ByleName-kwmrLn cYaBaU byle__name"><span class="BaseWrap-sc-gjQpdd BaseText-ewhhUZ BylePreamble-iJolpQ iUEiRd bIbWCO gnILss byle__preamble">By </span>Savannah Walsh</span></span></p></div></div></div></div></div></div></li><li><div class="AdWrapper-dQtivb fZrssQ RecircMostPopularSummaryItem-jQxxiw fHLKqj ad ad--asi"><div class="ad__slot ad__slot--asi" data-no-id="l4wl5"></div></div></li></ul><div class="RecircMostPopularFooter-enPjgs eAuebe"></div></div></div></div><div class="StickyBoxPlaceholr-grPmrg dxAvXx"></div></div></div></div><div class="RowWrapper-UmqTg HEhan full-bleed-ad row-mid-ntent-ad"><div class="StickyMidContentAdWrapper-fSBzwl drzyIa ad-stickymidntent"><div class="AdWrapper-dQtivb fZrssQ ad ad--mid-ntent should-hold-space"><div class="ad__slot ad__slot--mid-ntent" data-no-id="lpsxjb"></div></div></div></div><div class="GridWrapper-cAzTTK kHBDeH grid grid-margs grid-ems-2 ArticlePageChunksGrid-hfxa bjczjj grid-layout--adrail narrow wi-adrail"><div class="GridItem-buujkM stRKV grid--em grid-layout__ntent"><div class="BodyWrapper-kufPGa lnwCqV body body__ntaer article__body" data-journey-hook="client-ntent" data-ttid="BodyWrapper"><div class="body__ner-ntaer"><p class="paywall">“He was never the same after Moroc,” Judy says, “and neher were we. We were always worried about his physil safety and his mental state—that he would spair and hurt himself. It seemed to him was takg forever to feel safe.”</p><div data-attr-viewport-monor="le-recirc" class="le-recirc-wrapper le-recirc-observer-target-7 viewport-monor-anchor"></div><p class="paywall">Matthew told Ta he was hnted by the qutn of whether the perpetrators had ever been ught and what had happened to them. “He was imprsed wh the apartheid heargs South Ai—how Nelson Manla offered fivens as a step towards endg the vlence. He thought that was a ol revolutnary ia,” Ta says.</p><p class="paywall">After the rape, Judy says, Matthew suffered om perds of paranoia. “He would say, ‘My fear is irratnal, I shouldn’t be aaid of people.’ And then he would over-pensate for his fear by makg himself do somethg he shouldn’t”—a kd of unterphobia, which he’d recklsly put himself to the hands of strangers. Romae rells how he’d sometim take risks wh his safety, such as walkg alone at night Denver, explag that he didn’t want to be circumscribed by fear. On the fay vatn to Yellowstone last summer, he went to a bar Cody by himself late one night. He drank heavily, left wh some strangers, and eventually passed out, wh flashbacks of Moroc. He awoke, uncerta of what had happened, wh a spl lip and bised jaw. Later the bartenr told the police that Matthew had ma a pass at him and that he had therefore been pelled to h him.</p><p class="paywall">Matthew was “ut when to datg,” Romae says. He had only had one ser relatnship, while he was at school North Carola, wh a man who ma him unhappy. Judy worried that he uld be vulnerable to an emotnally abive relatnship. “Matt allowed [his first boyiend] to hurt him aga and aga.”</p><p class="paywall">It was through Ameri Onle last summer that Matthew met Brian Goon, a 36-year-old optician om Denver. Brian says that ually such munitns take a sexual turn immediately: “It’s ‘What’s your stats, when n I e over?’” He and Matthew trad qutns for an hour, and then Matthew told him he thought he was really gog to like him bee Brian hadn’t h on him. They rrpond and talked regularly for several months. “Matt was hant to meet,” Brian says. “I asked him why, and I uld hear his voice tremblg. He told me he was aaid somethg a lot more ser would happen.” Matthew was worried that he’d bee too attached, too pennt, as he had the tenncy to do some relatnships. “Fally, he ved me to Laramie for three days,” Brian says, “om October 9 to 12.”</p><p class="paywall">As September closed, Matthew was prsed. “Midterms were g up,” Ta says. “He was aaid of failure—he felt all this prsure not to fuck up.”</p><p class="paywall">“We were really hopeful at the begng of the semter,” his mother says. Matthew suffered om attentn fic disorr, and had always stggled as a stunt. “A ‘B’ for him was a real achievement,” Judy says. “He’d have a panic attack and would miss class and then get so far behd there was no way of tchg up. He had a hab of movg, stead of stayg one place and makg thgs work…. He was gog to try as hard as he uld Laramie, and if didn’t work, at the end of the semter we were gog to try somethg different—perhaps more tensive therapy. He was only a month to the semter when he died, but he was beg more sad and whdrawn.”</p></div></div></div><div class="GridItem-buujkM fVLMby grid--em grid-layout__asi"><div class="StickyBoxWrapper-jfYB jxBcTH sticky-box"><div class="StickyBoxPrimary-dzWDWL cdhYoN sticky-box__primary"><div class="AdWrapper-dQtivb fZrssQ ad ad--rail"><div class="ad__slot ad__slot--rail" data-no-id="wl2u6"></div></div><div class="ConsumerMarketgUnThemedWrapper-iUTMTf jssHut nsumer-marketg-un nsumer-marketg-un--display-rail" role="prentatn" aria-hidn="te"><div class="nsumer-marketg-un__slot nsumer-marketg-un__slot--display-rail"></div><div class="journey-un"></div></div><div data-attr-viewport-monor="" class="RecircMostPopularWrapper-bRuGTi jkTTgR recirc-most-popular-wrapper viewport-monor-anchor"><div class="RecircMostPopularConter-jiViNn ktrplG recirc-most-popular-sparrow-trackg hi-asi-ad" data-most-popular-id="mod-most-popular-1113"><div class="RecircMostPopularHeadg-iVzhzt hBHzvB">Most 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class="aspect-rat--overlay-ntaer"><picture class="RponsiveImagePicture-cWuUZO dUOtEa SummaryItemRponsiveAsset-hjGIGg egpoQR summary-em__image rponsive-image"><noscript><source media="(max-width: 767px)" srcSet="" siz="100vw"/><source media="(m-width: 768px)" srcSet="" siz="100vw"/><img alt="Vany Fair’s “It’s Rag Teens” Cover at 20: Where Are They Now?" class="RponsiveImageContaer-eybHBd fptoWY rponsive-image__image" src="></noscript></picture></div></div></span></a></div><div class="SummaryItemContent-eiDYMl XMZX summary-em__ntent summary-em__ntent--no-bric"><a class="SummaryItemHedLk-civM fPFrPI summary-em-trackg__hed-lk summary-em__hed-lk" data-ponent-type="recirc-river" data-recirc-id="em-hed-1" data-recirc-pattern="summary-em" href=" target="_self"><div data-ttid="ClampWrapper" class="ClampWrapper-kZxfkB hTTNGO clamp SummaryItemHedBase-hiFYpQ hRVxvR summary-em__hed"><div class="ClampContent-hilPkr jVhSBH"><div class="SummaryItemHedTag-TWblf gxaOcP" 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iUEiRd bIbWCO gnILss byle__preamble">By </span>Savannah Walsh</span></span></p></div></div></div></div></div></div></li><li><div class="AdWrapper-dQtivb fZrssQ RecircMostPopularSummaryItem-jQxxiw fHLKqj ad ad--asi"><div class="ad__slot ad__slot--asi" data-no-id="o432rp"></div></div></li></ul><div class="RecircMostPopularFooter-enPjgs eAuebe"></div></div></div></div><div class="StickyBoxPlaceholr-grPmrg dxAvXx"></div></div></div></div><div class="RowWrapper-UmqTg HEhan full-bleed-ad row-mid-ntent-ad"><div class="StickyMidContentAdWrapper-fSBzwl drzyIa ad-stickymidntent"><div class="AdWrapper-dQtivb fZrssQ ad ad--mid-ntent should-hold-space"><div class="ad__slot ad__slot--mid-ntent" data-no-id="dhyrdv"></div></div></div></div><div class="GridWrapper-cAzTTK kHBDeH grid grid-margs grid-ems-2 ArticlePageChunksGrid-hfxa bjczjj grid-layout--adrail narrow wi-adrail"><div class="GridItem-buujkM stRKV grid--em grid-layout__ntent"><div class="BodyWrapper-kufPGa lnwCqV body body__ntaer article__body" data-journey-hook="client-ntent" data-ttid="BodyWrapper"><div class="body__ner-ntaer"><p class="paywall">Although he had a psychiatrist who prcribed meditn for him, he was lookg for a therapist he uld really talk to. “He had seen somebody at the stunt health center, but she jt wanted to talk about his amic goals—she didn’t seem to really unrstand his prsn,” Ta rells. He had been hospalized several tim for prsn and suicidal iatn; the prev summer he had checked himself to a hospal Laramie. He was takg Effexor, an antiprsant, and Klonop, an anti-anxiety dg. Judy was ncerned that the meditns weren’t workg and that Matthew would drk, “and the batn of the dgs and the alhol would epen his sadns.”</p><p class="has-dropp paywall">On Friday, October 2, Matthew asked Ta to acpany him to the Tornado, a gay bar Fort Colls, Colorado, Doc’s limoe. Matthew owned a 1978 Bron, but he disliked drivg . “He said he felt lost ,” Ta says, “a ltle guy a such a big tck.” But he was also “worried that rentg the limoe he was beg selfish. I’d never ridn a limoe before. I said, ‘If you n’t pamper yourself, thk that you’re pamperg me.’”</p><p class="paywall">At the Tornado, Ta and Matthew sat the garn talkg for an hour about life goals and dreams and ath. He told her how guilty he felt about havg been born to a well-off fay, and she said that he uld e his rourc to help people. Matthew told her that if anythg ever happened to her and Phil, he’d like to be the guardian of their children. Then he asked her if she would take his t, Clayton, if somethg ever happened to him.</p><div data-attr-viewport-monor="le-recirc" class="le-recirc-wrapper le-recirc-observer-target-8 viewport-monor-anchor"></div><p class="paywall">“I knew how much he loved his t. I said, ‘O.K., om now on, when we move to an apartment we’ll make sure we get on that allow pets,’ thkg he’d outlive Clayton and we were talkg about some later t.”</p><p class="paywall">Insi the Tornado, several men approached Matthew. The first, someone warned, was H.I.V.-posive and didn’t always tell people, so Matthew shied away om him. Matthew had told Ta that he was worried about H.I.V. and always ed protectn. “Then this other guy me and stuck to him like glue,” Ta says. “Matt didn’t like him, but he uldn’t figure out how to get rid of him and still be pole.”</p><p class="paywall">Ridg home the early hours of Saturday morng, Matthew told Ta he felt that “if he died no one would even notice until his bills weren’t paid, and then his parents would ll up to bch and then realize he was ad. He felt nobody red what he was gog through. He told me about his ltle suici plan—he would take all his Klonop at once wh alhol. I asked how often he had been thkg of this, and he said que a b. It seemed like he was pretty close—closer than the way he scribed other prsns.” Then he leaned his head on Ta’s cht and fell asleep listeng to her heart beat. “I’m like, Wow, I have a iend who’s not aaid to touch me,” she rells. “Most iends seem to thk affectn go on only on special ocsns.”</p><p class="has-dropp paywall">When they got back to Laramie, Ta asked if she uld sleep on Matthew’s uch so as not to leave him alone. Saturday morng she awoke to hear Matthew an argument on the phone wh his mother, who was upset bee he had overdrawn his bank acunt—a pattern of his.</p><p class="paywall">“Afterwards he felt really bad bee he lost his ol and started csg at her, which he had never done before,” she says. “That afternoon I had to go home bee Phil had a ld. I asked Matthew if I should ll somebody for him, and he told me that he knew ep down, he’d be O.K.—that he uld get through this.” She asked him to promise he wouldn’t do anythg to hurt himself until she got back, and he promised.</p><p class="paywall">On Sunday, he lled his mother and apologized, tellg her, “You’re right, I’ve got to be more reful wh my money. I promise I’ll do better.” Then he said, “I love you, Mom—I’ll talk to you later.”</p><p class="paywall">Judy weeps now, rellg her last words to her son. “I love you, too. Be safe,” she said. “That was my mantra to Matt—be smart, be safe.”</p><p class="paywall">That afternoon, Ta tried llg Matthew. When she got no answer, she went to his apartment and then searched downtown, where she was relieved to fd him a rtrant.</p><p class="paywall">On Tuday, Ta had ught a ld and stayed home all day. She tried to reach Matthew that eveng, but she wasn’t feelg well enough to go look for him. Wednday morng she started llg him right away, and beme anx when she got no answer.</p><div data-attr-viewport-monor="le-recirc" class="le-recirc-wrapper le-recirc-observer-target-9 viewport-monor-anchor"></div><p class="paywall">After batg wh herself, at seven that eveng she cid to go ahead and ll the police. She told the officer that she had a iend she wanted them to check on. The officer asked for his name, and when she told him, a long silence ensued. Then the officer started askg a lot of qutns, like whether there were any people town who didn’t like Matthew. “I’m thkg the aren’t normal qutns, but I try and answer. And then they say they’re gog to send an officer over to talk to me. And then I’m really sred. I don’t want them to send an officer to me, I want them to send an officer to look for Matt. When the officer gets here she don’t tell me anythg, but she starts askg more qutns, nng all the nam by me, askg whether I knew Aaron McKney and Rsell Henrson. But I had never heard of them.”</p></div></div></div><div class="GridItem-buujkM fVLMby grid--em grid-layout__asi"><div class="StickyBoxWrapper-jfYB jxBcTH sticky-box"><div class="StickyBoxPrimary-dzWDWL cdhYoN sticky-box__primary"><div class="AdWrapper-dQtivb fZrssQ ad ad--rail"><div class="ad__slot ad__slot--rail" data-no-id="qfxz7f"></div></div><div class="ConsumerMarketgUnThemedWrapper-iUTMTf jssHut nsumer-marketg-un nsumer-marketg-un--display-rail" role="prentatn" aria-hidn="te"><div class="nsumer-marketg-un__slot nsumer-marketg-un__slot--display-rail"></div><div class="journey-un"></div></div><div data-attr-viewport-monor="" class="RecircMostPopularWrapper-bRuGTi jkTTgR recirc-most-popular-wrapper viewport-monor-anchor"><div class="RecircMostPopularConter-jiViNn ktrplG recirc-most-popular-sparrow-trackg hi-asi-ad" data-most-popular-id="mod-most-popular-1114"><div class="RecircMostPopularHeadg-iVzhzt hBHzvB">Most Popular</div><ul class="RecircMostPopularItems-dCAajf 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data-ttid="BodyWrapper"><div class="body__ner-ntaer"><p class="paywall">When Matt Mickelson, the owner of the Firi, heard of the arrts of McKney and Henrson, his first reactn “was like: Where did those bastards e om? Where are they om? Then I found out they were om here.” He thks “Rsell’s a trailer-trash kid. His mom’s a dnk broad” who has “had some random dus.”</p><p class="paywall">On January 3, Rsell’s mother, Cdy Dixon—a 40-year-old alholic and battered wife who was last seen staggerg out of a bar—was disvered ozen to ath on a snowy, ral road eight north of town.</p><p class="paywall">Mickelson rells Rsell’s mother g to the bar a few weeks after the slayg wh Rsell’s stepfather, Charl Dixon. They bought a uple of dollar beers, and then Charl Dixon approached Mickelson to apologize for any trouble the attack may have ed to his bs. “He says Rs and Aaron were g off a four-day benr, dog crank [methamphetame]. I was like: What n I say? Sorry your kid tied someone to a fence and beat him to ath?” He throws up his hands. “It’s over my head, man.”</p><p class="paywall">The natnal prs typed Aaron and Rsell as rednecks—a characterizatn which angers many Laramie rints. Mickelson, whose fay me to the area 1862 and has clud generatns of wboys, says that “rednecks aren’t ignorant or narrowmd—you get a red neck om workg the sun. The kids aren’t rednecks; they’re lazy ltle crankheads—rather than gettg a job, they’re out tryg to rob someone. They’re not wboys—they’re wardly. To have to tie someone up to beat them … ” he adds, a tail for which he has particular ntempt.</p><p class="has-dropp paywall">There is a grim narrative siary among the stori of Aaron McKney, Rsell Henrson, Kristen Price, and Chasy Pasley—liv both chaotic and dull, the tails numbgly terchangeable. Aaron’s parents, Bill and Denise McKney, divorced when Aaron was young. Aaron spent much of his childhood alone; acrdg to the Associated Prs, his mother left him wh his grandparents or locked him the basement to keep him out of trouble. He often got to fights school and did poorly, flunkg seventh gra. At 14 he stole a sh register and was placed a youth-tentn center. When he was 16 his mother died unexpectedly followg surgery. He qu school and began workg.</p><p class="paywall">A uple of years ago, he met Kristen Price, who moved to the trailer Aaron shared wh a bunch of other guys. When Aaron hered some money after his mother’s ath, he reportedly went on a bge, buyg dgs, jewelry, and a Camaro wh a vany plate scribed DOPEY.</p><p class="paywall">Aaron soon ran through the money, and last December, along wh two acplic, broke to the lol KFC, stealg $2,500 and some sserts. After the robbery, Aaron and Kristen moved to Pensala, Florida, where Kristen’s mother, Kim Kelly, liv. Aaron got a job as an apprentice pipe fter, but the police ught up wh them and they returned to Laramie so that he uld face the robbery charge. Last summer their son, Cameron, was born.</p><p class="paywall">Doc rells that Kristen and Aaron were “always lovey-dovey when I saw them. I never saw Aaron h her or get her face.” He saw Kristen as “a happy-go-lucky gal.” They’d ocsnally hire his limoe and for $60 an hour ri around, drkg and watchg TV. Doc liked them: they “always tipped well, were well mannered—once a while McKney got shfaced, but he wasn’t that hard to handle.” McKney liked rap mic. “Weird stuff,” Doc says, “like: ‘Nancy, give me head, head, ad, ad’—I never heard that type of stuff before.” Sometim they’d pick up Rsell, whom Doc rells as “a d-mannered fellow.” He says that sometim “Aaron would ri around the limoe wh other girls.” Doc thought Kristen knew and didn’t re.</p><div data-attr-viewport-monor="le-recirc" class="le-recirc-wrapper le-recirc-observer-target-10 viewport-monor-anchor"></div><p class="paywall">Aaron’s iend Odi, a 22-year-old Ain-Amerin manual laborer who go by a sgle name (“Like Prce,” he says) saw Aaron as havg “a lot of anger—more than most kids. I uld image him beatg someone, but not like that.” Aaron ed dgs, but, Odi says, “so do 93 percent of kids this town.” People remember Aaron once “flippg out” at a Laramie bar upon seeg the doctor he believed rponsible for his mother’s ath. Bill McKney tried to expla Matthew’s ath as his son’s reactn to Matthew’s alleged sexual overture. Aaron, he said, don’t like to be embarrassed ont of other people.</p><p class="paywall">Odi first met Aaron a crisis center Laramie when they were teenagers. Aaron’s mother had to leave him there for perds of time when she found him too difficult to manage; Aaron hated beg trapped there, subject to strict regulatns. Odi has trouble formulatg what he liked about Aaron: “He played practil jok on me. Once he put honey my shampoo.” Qutned about Aaron’s life, he rponds, “We didn’t talk about his favore movie, favore thgs. It seems like you e om a nice place—a world where people have favore thgs. If you’re askg me if we ever got ep-ep, we never did.” When asked if Aaron had any close iends—people who really knew him—he wrkl his nose: “Who do?”</p></div></div></div><div class="GridItem-buujkM fVLMby grid--em grid-layout__asi"><div class="StickyBoxWrapper-jfYB jxBcTH sticky-box"><div class="StickyBoxPrimary-dzWDWL cdhYoN sticky-box__primary"><div class="AdWrapper-dQtivb fZrssQ ad ad--rail"><div class="ad__slot ad__slot--rail" data-no-id="3f8woh"></div></div><div class="ConsumerMarketgUnThemedWrapper-iUTMTf jssHut nsumer-marketg-un nsumer-marketg-un--display-rail" role="prentatn" aria-hidn="te"><div class="nsumer-marketg-un__slot nsumer-marketg-un__slot--display-rail"></div><div class="journey-un"></div></div><div data-attr-viewport-monor="" class="RecircMostPopularWrapper-bRuGTi jkTTgR recirc-most-popular-wrapper viewport-monor-anchor"><div class="RecircMostPopularConter-jiViNn ktrplG recirc-most-popular-sparrow-trackg hi-asi-ad" data-most-popular-id="mod-most-popular-1115"><div 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class="SummaryItemHedTag-TWblf gxaOcP" data-ttid="SummaryItemHed"><em>Vany Fair</em>’s “It’s Rag Teens” Cover at 20: Where Are They Now?</div></div></div></a><div class="SummaryItemByleWrapper-boCfbi cuRXdL summary-em__byle-date-in"><div class="SummaryItemBaseByle-fFbXkY gRtaxp summary-em__byle"><div class="summary-em__byle__ntent"><div data-ttid="BylWrapper" class="BylWrapper-KIudk irTIfE byl"><p class="ByleWrapper-jWHrLH iNSiTG byle byl__byle" data-ttid="ByleWrapper" emProp="thor" emType="><span emProp="name" class="ByleNamWrapper-jbHncj fuDQVo"><span data-ttid="ByleName" class="ByleName-kwmrLn cYaBaU byle__name"><span class="BaseWrap-sc-gjQpdd BaseText-ewhhUZ BylePreamble-iJolpQ iUEiRd bIbWCO gnILss byle__preamble">By </span>Savannah Walsh</span></span></p></div></div></div></div></div></div></li><li><div class="SummaryItemWrapper-iwvBff doDafW summary-em summary-em--has-borr summary-em--ARTICLE summary-em--no-in summary-em--text-align-left summary-em--layout-placement-si-by-si 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siz="100vw"/><img alt="Rememberg Séad O’Connor’s Sublime Mic and Righteo Rage" class="RponsiveImageContaer-eybHBd fptoWY rponsive-image__image" src="></noscript></picture></div></div></span></a></div><div class="SummaryItemContent-eiDYMl XMZX summary-em__ntent summary-em__ntent--no-bric"><a class="SummaryItemHedLk-civM fPFrPI summary-em-trackg__hed-lk summary-em__hed-lk" data-ponent-type="recirc-river" data-recirc-id="em-hed-2" data-recirc-pattern="summary-em" href=" target="_self"><div data-ttid="ClampWrapper" class="ClampWrapper-kZxfkB hTTNGO clamp SummaryItemHedBase-hiFYpQ hRVxvR summary-em__hed"><div class="ClampContent-hilPkr jVhSBH"><div class="SummaryItemHedTag-TWblf gxaOcP" data-ttid="SummaryItemHed">Rememberg Séad O’Connor’s Sublime Mic and Righteo Rage</div></div></div></a><div class="SummaryItemByleWrapper-boCfbi cuRXdL summary-em__byle-date-in"><div class="SummaryItemBaseByle-fFbXkY gRtaxp summary-em__byle"><div class="summary-em__byle__ntent"><div data-ttid="BylWrapper" class="BylWrapper-KIudk irTIfE byl"><p class="ByleWrapper-jWHrLH iNSiTG byle byl__byle" data-ttid="ByleWrapper" emProp="thor" emType="><span emProp="name" class="ByleNamWrapper-jbHncj fuDQVo"><span data-ttid="ByleName" class="ByleName-kwmrLn cYaBaU byle__name"><span class="BaseWrap-sc-gjQpdd BaseText-ewhhUZ BylePreamble-iJolpQ iUEiRd bIbWCO gnILss byle__preamble">By </span>Mike Hogan</span></span></p></div></div></div></div></div></div></li><li><div class="SummaryItemWrapper-iwvBff doDafW summary-em summary-em--has-borr summary-em--ARTICLE summary-em--no-in summary-em--text-align-left summary-em--layout-placement-si-by-si summary-em--layout-posn-image-left summary-em--layout-proportns-33-66 summary-em--si-by-si-align-center summary-em--si-by-si-image-right-mobile-false summary-em--standard RecircMostPopularSummaryItem-jQxxiw jkeAv" role="button" tabx="0"><div class="SummaryItemAssetContaer-gwhFFH VOyg summary-em__asset-ntaer"><a class="SummaryItemImageLk-dshqxb cPpCwE summary-em__image-lk summary-em-trackg__image-lk" href=" aria-hidn="te" tabx="-1" data-ponent-type="recirc-river" data-recirc-id="em-image-3" data-recirc-pattern="summary-em" target="_self"><span class="SpanWrapper-umhxW kGxnNB rponsive-asset SummaryItemRponsiveAsset-hjGIGg egpoQR summary-em__image"><div data-tt="aspect-rat-ntaer" class="AspectRatContaer-bJHpJz cCcPgL"><div class="aspect-rat--overlay-ntaer"><picture class="RponsiveImagePicture-cWuUZO dUOtEa SummaryItemRponsiveAsset-hjGIGg egpoQR summary-em__image rponsive-image"><noscript><source media="(max-width: 767px)" srcSet="" siz="100vw"/><source media="(m-width: 768px)" srcSet="" siz="100vw"/><img alt="Red, Whe & Royal Blue May Be “the Most Expensive B of Fan Fictn Ever”" class="RponsiveImageContaer-eybHBd fptoWY rponsive-image__image" src="></noscript></picture></div></div></span></a></div><div class="SummaryItemContent-eiDYMl XMZX summary-em__ntent summary-em__ntent--no-bric"><a class="SummaryItemHedLk-civM fPFrPI summary-em-trackg__hed-lk summary-em__hed-lk" data-ponent-type="recirc-river" data-recirc-id="em-hed-3" data-recirc-pattern="summary-em" href=" target="_self"><div data-ttid="ClampWrapper" class="ClampWrapper-kZxfkB hTTNGO clamp SummaryItemHedBase-hiFYpQ hRVxvR summary-em__hed"><div class="ClampContent-hilPkr jVhSBH"><div class="SummaryItemHedTag-TWblf gxaOcP" data-ttid="SummaryItemHed"><em>Red, Whe & Royal Blue</em> May Be “the Most Expensive B of Fan Fictn Ever”</div></div></div></a><div class="SummaryItemByleWrapper-boCfbi cuRXdL summary-em__byle-date-in"><div class="SummaryItemBaseByle-fFbXkY gRtaxp summary-em__byle"><div class="summary-em__byle__ntent"><div data-ttid="BylWrapper" class="BylWrapper-KIudk irTIfE byl"><p class="ByleWrapper-jWHrLH iNSiTG byle byl__byle" data-ttid="ByleWrapper" emProp="thor" emType="><span emProp="name" class="ByleNamWrapper-jbHncj fuDQVo"><span data-ttid="ByleName" class="ByleName-kwmrLn cYaBaU byle__name"><span class="BaseWrap-sc-gjQpdd BaseText-ewhhUZ BylePreamble-iJolpQ iUEiRd bIbWCO gnILss byle__preamble">By </span>Savannah Walsh</span></span></p></div></div></div></div></div></div></li><li><div class="AdWrapper-dQtivb fZrssQ RecircMostPopularSummaryItem-jQxxiw fHLKqj ad ad--asi"><div class="ad__slot ad__slot--asi" data-no-id="ixzjyf"></div></div></li></ul><div class="RecircMostPopularFooter-enPjgs eAuebe"></div></div></div></div><div class="StickyBoxPlaceholr-grPmrg dxAvXx"></div></div></div></div><div class="RowWrapper-UmqTg HEhan full-bleed-ad row-mid-ntent-ad"><div class="StickyMidContentAdWrapper-fSBzwl drzyIa ad-stickymidntent"><div class="AdWrapper-dQtivb fZrssQ ad ad--mid-ntent should-hold-space"><div class="ad__slot ad__slot--mid-ntent" data-no-id="4dsx9c"></div></div></div></div><div class="GridWrapper-cAzTTK kHBDeH grid grid-margs grid-ems-2 ArticlePageChunksGrid-hfxa bjczjj grid-layout--adrail narrow wi-adrail"><div class="GridItem-buujkM stRKV grid--em grid-layout__ntent"><div class="BodyWrapper-kufPGa lnwCqV body body__ntaer article__body" data-journey-hook="client-ntent" data-ttid="BodyWrapper"><div class="body__ner-ntaer"><p class="paywall">He remembers when Kristen was pregnant wh Cameron: “He was happy and proud; his baby was on the way. He had that cky attu, ‘I got a woman.’”</p><p class="paywall">Aaron’s iend Christa Tyser rells, “It wasn’t like a good relatnship or anythg. But after she got pregnant, I thk he felt like he had to stick wh her.” Christa hasn’t “known anybody who’s had an abortn—at my high school half the girls are pregnant.”</p><p class="paywall">“After his mom died, Aaron didn’t really re about anythg; he said he didn’t feel like he had anythg to do or anywhere to go—or any future,” Christa says. Odi says Aaron was “jt kd of floatg. Not everyone has hop and dreams the days—some people jt want to make through and still be able to se. Not everyone wants to be an astront or a movie star.”</p><p class="has-dropp paywall">Long before Cdy Dixon was found the snow, people assumed Rsell Henrson’s parents were ad. He never knew his father, and at age 10 he had been taken om his mother’s hoe, after reportedly havg been abed by var of his mother’s boyiends. He was raised by his strict Mormon grandparents and beme an honor stunt and a member of Future Farmers of Ameri. He pleted the requirements for the rank of Eagle Sut by cleang a lol cemetery, and had his picture taken wh the ernor and prted the *Boomerang.*Then he started hangg around wh guys like Aaron, qu school, and got a seri of menial jobs, the last of which was repairg roofs. He acquired a police rerd for dnken drivg and fightg wh a police officer.</p><p class="paywall">He and his girliend, Chasy Pasley, lived a $340-a-month trailer southwt Laramie. Their landlady, Sherry Aanenson, remembers Rsell as “quiet, pole, jt your average male…. He do what most guys do—hunt, fish, drk beer, there was a r he worked on.” She saw him as “pretty ntral—a follower.” A neighbor, however, plaed about his rowdy behavr. Chasy was a hman studyg art at U.W. at the time of the arrt. Her parents had spl when she was young; her father had moved to Alaska followg a ctody battle which he had unsuccsfully argued that her mother, Lda Larson, should lose ctody bee, he alleged, she was gay. Rsell and Chasy spent a lot of time wh Aaron and Kristen. The four of them nsired each other “bt bt iends.”</p><p class="has-dropp paywall">Tuday, October 6, was the birthday of Matthew’s old iend Walt Bouln, and they had planned to go to a movie. At 6:30, however, Matthew lled and nceled, tellg Walt he had to study for his French class. Then Matthew went to the weekly L.G.B.T.A. meetg, where plans were beg falized for the mp Gay Awarens Week, which would beg the followg Monday.</p><p class="paywall">Jim Osborn, the associatn chair, told the group that he had jt been harassed; he was walkg across mp when a guy me up to him and said, “You’re one of those faggots, aren’t you?” But Jim—a large man—punched his acster the face, and the guy ran away. After the meetg, the group went to the Village Inn, where Matthew ate cherry pie. He then tried to persua each of the members to acpany him to the Firi, but no one wanted to, and Kim Nash, a member of the L.G.B.T.A., drove him home. She watched until he went to his hoe. She thought he was for the night.</p><p class="has-dropp paywall">No one knows why Matthew was termed to go to the Firi that night, or why he left wh Aaron and Rsell. It was karaoke night, which would not ordarily have terted him. There was some speculatn that he was buyg dgs om Aaron and Rsell, but his iends fd that implsible. A close iend thks that prsn may have weakened his judgment, and wonrs if he had taken a heavy dose of Klonop before he went to the bar. “When he was prsed,” she says, “he would jt grab a handful.” Romae Patterson remembers how the ffee shop where she worked Matthew “would jt talk to anyone—people no one else would talk to, like this weird old man…. He had no discrimatn his person.”</p><p class="paywall">Matthew’s iends also fd hard to picture him beg sexually drawn to Aaron or Rsell. Nor do they thk that Matthew was terted a threome.</p><div data-attr-viewport-monor="le-recirc" class="le-recirc-wrapper le-recirc-observer-target-11 viewport-monor-anchor"></div><p class="paywall">But what if he was? The nials the prs seemed to suggt—as the old rape ethos—that Matthew had to have had no sexual tent orr not to be plic his own killg. Judy Shepard thks that night, like the Cody cint, was an example of Matthew’s “unterphobia.” Moreover, gettg ris wh strangers Laramie is not an unual or perilo thg to do.</p><p class="has-dropp paywall">The Firi is a rough bar, but not a menacg one. Big pup beer girls pop out of the walls, and a sign for the Wtern Athletic Conference reads, THE NEW WYOMING COWBOYS—READY TO KICK SOME WAC BUTT! A huge buffalo head ont of the D.J.’s booth blows smoke through s nostrils. The atmosphere is rowdy and iendly.</p><p class="paywall">Matt Galloway, a U.W. junr who was bartendg that Tuday, tells the story wh the perfect ntrasts of a Passn play. He started his shift at 10 P.M.; Matthew Shepard me half an hour later. Matthew—drsed jeans and a sport at—sat at the bar drkg a Heeken and a mixed drk and talkg to Galloway.</p><p class="paywall">Around 11:45, Aaron and Rsell me and orred a pcher of cheap beer, untg out the $5.50 quarters and dim. One of them had noticeably dirty hands; Galloway remembers wantg to unt their change out himself so as not to have handled by them. “It was ‘Gimme this, gimme that’—no ‘Thank you’s, no polens at all. The oppose of Matt.”</p><p class="paywall">Galloway scrib Matthew as “amazgly pole—soft-spoken, but well spoken. A person you n tell is kd—who would love to listen or be listened to.”</p><p class="paywall">Aaron and Rsell disappeared the directn of the pool table, but then returned to the bar. “They were here for [a while], out of beer, hangg out. They were g wh dim,” Galloway says. “Here’s this ltle kid, drsed very nice. Maybe they’ve seen him before and thought he was gay.”</p><p class="paywall">Matthew’s last beer st $2.50. “I went ahead and said, ‘Jt give me two bucks.’ He gave me three,” says Galloway.</p><p class="paywall">Shortly after midnight, the three of them left. As Matthew walked out the door, the D.J., Shadow, hand him what would be his last cigarette.</p><p class="paywall">“You got to smoke while you have ,” Mickelson later ments reflectively, shakg his head.</p><p class="has-dropp paywall">At 1:30 the morng on October 7, Aaron McKney me home disoriented and vered blood, Kristen Price explaed to the media after the murr. “He was cryg and he kept throwg up. He jt me and hugged me and said, ‘I’ve done somethg horrible. I serve to die.’” She asked what he had done and he said he wasn’t sure. “He said he thought maybe he killed somebody.”</p><p class="paywall">After she had cleaned him up, given him a glass of water, and laid him down, Aaron told her that “a guy walked up to him and said that he was gay and wanted to get wh Aaron and Rs,” Kristen said. “He got aggravated wh him and told him that he was straight and didn’t want anythg to do wh him and he walked off. Then later Aaron and Rs said, ‘Let’s pretend like we’re gay and we n—we’ll rob him and take his money.’</p><div data-attr-viewport-monor="le-recirc" class="le-recirc-wrapper le-recirc-observer-target-12 viewport-monor-anchor"></div><p class="paywall">“They jt wanted to beat him up bad enough to teach him a lson,” Kristen explaed, “not to e on to straight people and don’t be aggrsive about anymore.”</p><p class="paywall">Acrdg to the police, his nfsn Aaron said that durg the r ri Matthew had put his hand on his leg and asked, “When are we gog to get to where you live?” and Aaron told him, “Gus what? We’re not gay, and we’re gog to jack you up.” Aaron asked for Matthew’s wallet, which he gave to him, but they began to beat him anyway, wh the butt of a gun.</p><p class="paywall">Headg out of town, they drove about a e east, and then turned jt past the Wal-Mart to Sherman Hills—a hog velopment where Aaron had lived as a child. They ntued down a sandy dirt road, through sagebsh, until the road ad-end at a rough-hewn woon buck fence, at the borr of a property where a new hoe was unr nstctn.</p><p class="paywall">They bound Matthew’s hands together, behd his back, and then tied them to the fence, leavg his head and body cmpled near the ground (not a ccifixn posn). While Rsell tied the rope, Aaron took Matthew’s sho bee he thought his ptive would be able to ee himself and walk back to town. Then, acrdg to the police, Aaron ntued to beat him, while Rsell stood back, lghg.</p><p class="paywall">In his nfsn, Aaron said that Matthew had not ma a pass at them the bar, but did nce that he and Rsell had ma a plan to rob him. The reason they beat him after he was tied up was that they thought Matthew had seen their license-plate number. When they left, Aaron said, they assumed he was ad.</p><p class="paywall">Aaron and Rsell had planned to burglarize Matthew’s hoe, but they got distracted by a fight wh two Hispanic teenagers. Jeremy Herrera and Eiano Moral, both high-school dropouts, were walkg downtown near where Aaron and Rsell parked their tck. Jeremy and Eiano were bored; Jeremy had slashed a r tire “for shs and giggl,” he explaed to me. They bantered wh Aaron and Rsell, who “started talkg trash—‘Fuck you,’ llg bch and stuff,” Jeremy says—and then, acrdg to the teenagers, Aaron h Eiano wh a gun, bashg his skull. Next, Jeremy h Aaron the head wh a big stick he had hidn si his at. When the police showed up, Aaron and Rsell ran away, leavg their tck, which the police disvered Matthew’s cred rd and small patent-leather sho, along wh a .357 magnum vered blood.</p><p class="paywall">The afternoon after Aaron’s return to the apartment he shared wh Kristen, the two men and their girliends allegedly began to ordate the versn of events they would give to police. Then Kristen took Aaron to the hospal, where he was admted wh a hairle acture to the skull. Then, acrdg to police, she and Chasy cid to get rid of the evince. They drove the 50 to Cheyenne to dispose of Rsell’s bloody cloth. For some reason, they hid Rsell’s bloody sho separately, a storage shed at Chasy’s mother’s hoe.</p><p class="paywall">As happened, the nstctn crew that was workg at the new hoe on the property where Matthew clung to life was off that day. Although the police had Matthew’s personal effects, they had not yet put the crime together. Th was not until the followg eveng that Matthew was seen by the cyclist, a U.W. hman, Aaron Kreifels, who stopped bee he had fallen off his bike.</p><p class="has-dropp paywall">At the Poudre Valley Hospal Fort Colls, Colorado, Matthew lay bed down the hall om Aaron McKney. Matthew was atose; his bra stem—which ntrols heartbeat, breathg, temperature, and other voluntary functns—was severely damaged. He also was sufferg om hypothermia and had a red welt on his back, a red mark on his left arm, bised kne, cuts on his head, neck, and face, and bisg his gro.</p><p class="paywall">Ta and Phil arrived at the hospal Thursday morng. Matthew’s nt Roxanne and R. W. Eaton, her boyiend, were there om Denver, along wh some journalists. “There was gog to be a prs nference,” Ta says, and R.W. “was so antic; he said he didn’t want word gettg around that Matthew was gay…. R.W. and Roxy threatened that if we talked about we wouldn’t be allowed to see Matt.”</p><div data-attr-viewport-monor="le-recirc" class="le-recirc-wrapper le-recirc-observer-target-13 viewport-monor-anchor"></div><p class="paywall">When Ta was let to Matthew’s room, “ was btersweet to see what he looked like,” she says. “He had stch, bad cuts, welts, bis on his face. I had never seen anythg that severe. There was a big whe bandage on his head wh tub g out of . Bee of the rpirator his breathg sound very mechanil. His heart on the monor sound very loud—hntg. It remd me of the cint [ the limoe] where he listened to my heart. It was also a fortg sound—metronome-like. I uld feel his sence, his spir the room. It was like I uld feel angels, very posive fortg spirs the room—I thought he was gog to be O.K., he’s beg forted by all the angels. I uld feel that kd of fort reachg out to him.”</p></div></div></div><div class="GridItem-buujkM fVLMby grid--em grid-layout__asi"><div class="StickyBoxWrapper-jfYB jxBcTH sticky-box"><div class="StickyBoxPrimary-dzWDWL cdhYoN sticky-box__primary"><div class="AdWrapper-dQtivb fZrssQ ad ad--rail"><div class="ad__slot ad__slot--rail" data-no-id="r15"></div></div><div class="ConsumerMarketgUnThemedWrapper-iUTMTf jssHut nsumer-marketg-un nsumer-marketg-un--display-rail" role="prentatn" aria-hidn="te"><div class="nsumer-marketg-un__slot nsumer-marketg-un__slot--display-rail"></div><div class="journey-un"></div></div><div data-attr-viewport-monor="" class="RecircMostPopularWrapper-bRuGTi jkTTgR recirc-most-popular-wrapper viewport-monor-anchor"><div class="RecircMostPopularConter-jiViNn ktrplG recirc-most-popular-sparrow-trackg hi-asi-ad" data-most-popular-id="mod-most-popular-1116"><div class="RecircMostPopularHeadg-iVzhzt hBHzvB">Most Popular</div><ul class="RecircMostPopularItems-dCAajf 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data-ponent-type="recirc-river" data-recirc-id="em-image-3" data-recirc-pattern="summary-em" target="_self"><span class="SpanWrapper-umhxW kGxnNB rponsive-asset SummaryItemRponsiveAsset-hjGIGg egpoQR summary-em__image"><div data-tt="aspect-rat-ntaer" class="AspectRatContaer-bJHpJz cCcPgL"><div class="aspect-rat--overlay-ntaer"><picture class="RponsiveImagePicture-cWuUZO dUOtEa SummaryItemRponsiveAsset-hjGIGg egpoQR summary-em__image rponsive-image"><noscript><source media="(max-width: 767px)" srcSet="" siz="100vw"/><source media="(m-width: 768px)" srcSet="" siz="100vw"/><img alt="Red, Whe & Royal Blue May Be “the Most Expensive B of Fan Fictn Ever”" class="RponsiveImageContaer-eybHBd fptoWY rponsive-image__image" src="></noscript></picture></div></div></span></a></div><div class="SummaryItemContent-eiDYMl XMZX summary-em__ntent summary-em__ntent--no-bric"><a class="SummaryItemHedLk-civM fPFrPI summary-em-trackg__hed-lk summary-em__hed-lk" data-ponent-type="recirc-river" data-recirc-id="em-hed-3" data-recirc-pattern="summary-em" href=" target="_self"><div data-ttid="ClampWrapper" class="ClampWrapper-kZxfkB hTTNGO clamp SummaryItemHedBase-hiFYpQ hRVxvR summary-em__hed"><div class="ClampContent-hilPkr jVhSBH"><div class="SummaryItemHedTag-TWblf gxaOcP" data-ttid="SummaryItemHed"><em>Red, Whe & Royal Blue</em> May Be “the Most Expensive B of Fan Fictn Ever”</div></div></div></a><div class="SummaryItemByleWrapper-boCfbi cuRXdL summary-em__byle-date-in"><div class="SummaryItemBaseByle-fFbXkY gRtaxp summary-em__byle"><div class="summary-em__byle__ntent"><div data-ttid="BylWrapper" class="BylWrapper-KIudk irTIfE byl"><p class="ByleWrapper-jWHrLH iNSiTG byle byl__byle" data-ttid="ByleWrapper" emProp="thor" emType="><span emProp="name" class="ByleNamWrapper-jbHncj fuDQVo"><span data-ttid="ByleName" class="ByleName-kwmrLn cYaBaU byle__name"><span class="BaseWrap-sc-gjQpdd BaseText-ewhhUZ BylePreamble-iJolpQ iUEiRd bIbWCO gnILss byle__preamble">By </span>Savannah Walsh</span></span></p></div></div></div></div></div></div></li><li><div class="AdWrapper-dQtivb fZrssQ RecircMostPopularSummaryItem-jQxxiw fHLKqj ad ad--asi"><div class="ad__slot ad__slot--asi" data-no-id="dpmvh"></div></div></li></ul><div class="RecircMostPopularFooter-enPjgs eAuebe"></div></div></div></div><div class="StickyBoxPlaceholr-grPmrg dxAvXx"></div></div></div></div><div class="RowWrapper-UmqTg HEhan full-bleed-ad row-mid-ntent-ad"><div class="StickyMidContentAdWrapper-fSBzwl drzyIa ad-stickymidntent"><div class="AdWrapper-dQtivb fZrssQ ad ad--mid-ntent should-hold-space"><div class="ad__slot ad__slot--mid-ntent" data-no-id="a97y2oj"></div></div></div></div><div class="GridWrapper-cAzTTK kHBDeH grid grid-margs grid-ems-2 ArticlePageChunksGrid-hfxa bjczjj grid-layout--adrail narrow wi-adrail"><div class="GridItem-buujkM stRKV grid--em grid-layout__ntent"><div class="BodyWrapper-kufPGa lnwCqV body body__ntaer article__body" data-journey-hook="client-ntent" data-ttid="BodyWrapper"><div class="body__ner-ntaer"><p class="paywall">Judy and Dennis Shepard arrived om Sdi Arabia on Friday night. The phone ll had e at four the morng; they had waed 20 hours for a flight to Amsterdam, and then flown on to Mneapolis to pick up their son Logan before ntug on to Colorado. The doctors told them that Matthew would never emerge om the a, but, Judy says, “we need to see him and we were aaid he would die before we got there.”</p><p class="paywall">In their son’s room “there was a sense of peace,” she ntu. “He looked so ltle. There were all the cuts on his face. I felt he was wh —but not the shell. Logan said this mt be Matt’s sty. Everythg mt have led to this pot. This mt be part of a larger plan.”</p><p class="paywall">“Perhaps God took him home to heal him,” a iend of Judy’s told her.</p><p class="has-dropp paywall">Matthew was not the first gay victim of an attack that year, or that week. The most recent F.B.I. statistics on hate crim the U.S. showed more than 1,400 attacks on gays 1997. A 1996 study showed that such attacks rulted 21 fatali. Moreover, studi show their aths are often particularly vic; many victims are btalized beyond regnn. In 1996, Dennis Phung was beaten to ath wh the claw end of a hammer his Hollywood apartment by two teenagers who left a mask on his head wh the words “gay bash” scrawled across , and Leeanne Keh of Downey, California, was shot and paralyzed by her father--law bee she was ntemplatg leavg her hband for a close female iend. Although nvictns were obtaed, outsi the gay prs the s disappeared.</p><p class="paywall">Matthew’s torment, however—om the first reports—evoked an extraordary rponse. Across the untry, the story drew ont-page verage for days. <em>Time</em> magaze’s ver, which was headled THE WAR OVER GAYS, was a photograph of the fence. “He wanted to fd love. But as he lay near ath, Matthew Shepard, through no choice of his own, had found martyrdom,” the article said. The fence had bee the crossroads of a civil-rights movement, and Matthew the most signifint symbol of vlence agast gays the history of the untry.</p><p class="paywall">Print Clton spoke about the ath, urgg Congrs to approve the Hate Crim Preventn Act, which would give feral agenci jurisdictn over bias cints. More than 50 ndlelight vigils were held around the untry, huge events where strangers wept and embraced one another. The Poudre Valley Hospal lobby was so crowd wh flowers that employe began puttg them other patients’ rooms.</p><p class="has-dropp paywall">When the Shepards disvered that the beatg was a natnal news story, Judy went to the bathroom and threw up. She uldn’t believe that “somethg so private had bee so public— was jt stolen om .” She “didn’t want to be exploed,” and she was worried about the prs “gog after an ugly way.”</p><p class="paywall">When the hospal received lls, Judy felt, “Why should we leave our son orr to talk to a stranger?” They were reluctant even to take a ll om Print Clton, but they did, and were glad they had. He was warm, and the nversatn seemed to help Logan. They told the print that Matthew had mpaigned for him twice, which seemed to startle him.</p><p class="paywall">The Inter played a ccial role nnectg people to the tragedy. Poudre Valley Hospal received so many lls about Matthew that twice-daily updat on his ndn were posted on a Web se; more than 800,000 hs were logged.</p><div data-attr-viewport-monor="le-recirc" class="le-recirc-wrapper le-recirc-observer-target-14 viewport-monor-anchor"></div><p class="paywall">Matthew lay atose for five days. Shortly after midnight on October 12, the first day of Natnal Gay Awarens Week, his heart stopped. Throughout Wyomg, flags were lowered to half-mast. “The fay exprsed gratu that they did not have to make a cisn about removg life support,” Rulon Stacey, the hospal C.E.O., told the prs, his voice choked wh emotn. “They said that like the good, rg son he was he removed om them the guilt and strs of makg that cisn.”</p><p class="paywall">Parents throughout the untry felt that Matthew uld have been their son, an ia many had never ntemplated before about a gay person. In part, this may have been a rult of the fact that while he was scribed as gay, the prs— unwtg lln wh homophobia—did not portray Matthew as a sexual adult. He was picted as havg parents, rather than partners—lovg, affluent, married Amerin parents. He had an allowance; he wore brac. He was a member of the U.W. Epispal Canterbury Club. He had a agile, childlike look—a look of pale pury, the translucent bety favored relig art.</p><p class="has-dropp paywall">In the midst of the natnal grief, there were a few who appld Aaron’s and Rsell’s actns, and was the voic that created the ntroversy which ma the ath a polil e. On Saturday afternoon, a few blocks om the hospal bed where Matthew’s parents were keepg vigil, a Colorado State Universy homeg para passed by. On a <em>Wizard of Oz</em> float sponsored by the Pi Kappa Alpha aterny and Alpha Chi Omega sorory, the srecrow character had been faced. Scrawled black spray pat was I’M GAY, as well as anti-homosexual obsceni. The tail that the cyclist who disvered Matthew had first mistaken him for a srecrow had been particularly chillg. Even dyg was not enough to make Matthew human to some of his peers.</p><p class="paywall">Hours after his ath, two gay anizatns received the msage “I hope happens more often.” At Matthew’s funeral Casper, protters om Reverend Fred Phelps’s Wtboro Baptist Church Topeka, Kansas, stood the snow and ra, rryg signs and chantg, “Fags die, God lghs.” Mourners blocked them and sang “Amazg Grace.” Insi St. Mark’s Epispal Church, where Matthew had been baptized as a teenager and beme an alyte, his godfather, Steve Gherg, a pilot for Northwt Airl, spoke. “There is an image seared upon my md when I reflect upon Matt on that woon crossrail fence,” he said. “However, I have found a different image to replace that wh and that is the image of another man, almost 2,000 years ago…. When I ncentrate on the Son of God beg ccified, only then n I be released om the bterns and anger I feel.”</p><p class="paywall"><em>Imat Christi</em>—the parallelg of Matthew’s life wh J’s—was a domant motif the memorial servic of many fahs. For many Laramie churchgoers, renceivg the homosexual (the outsir to the church) as the te Christian, and the Reverend Mr. Phelps and his ilk as the Pharise, was a radil ia. At the memorial service the Laramie Epispal church, the Reverend Dr. Chuck Denison told mourners that gay Christians had nothg to ask fivens for. Meha Fenimore, Matthew’s iend, rells that was the first time that she had ever heard that msage church: “It was so amazg—I realized I uld walk to the church holdg Hva’s [her girliend’s] hand.”</p><p class="has-dropp paywall">As soon as news of the beatg broke, Tiffany Edwards ma her way to Kristen and Aaron’s addrs North Laramie. Unsure which apartment the dgy buildg was theirs, she went to a dark hallway and knocked on the first door she me to; a girl emerged a cloud of stale smoke. “It was a dump,” the reporter says. “The smell was so disgtg— was like gog to a bar on Sunday morng.” She uld hear a baby whimperg. Tiffany told the girl she was lookg for Kristen Price, and the young woman said she didn’t know her. “She looked like a cute ltle high-school girl, but harned—wh a bad attu.”</p><p class="paywall">The morng of Kristen’s arraignment, Tiffany saw the young woman aga and realized who she was. Kristen was drsed a short pistach-green skirt and high heels—“lookg like a cheap floozy, all dolled up to go to jail. I was like: Girliend, get a clue.” A short time later Tiffany saw her the urthoe, the regulatn orange jumpsu. Kristen’s mother stood next to her, holdg her grandson. When Kristen was led off handcuffs, Tiffany noticed that she didn’t kiss her baby good-bye—or even look at him. She fears that baby “will be part of the vic cycle.”</p><p class="paywall">Kristen and Chasy were charged as accsori to murr after the fact (a crime that rri a penalty of up to three years jail), and Aaron and Rsell were charged wh kidnappg, aggravated robbery, and first-gree murr, punishable by ath. “The news has already taken this up and blew totally out of proportn, bee volved a homosexual,” Aaron’s father, Bill McKney, told <em>The Denver Post.</em> “Had this been a heterosexual the two boys cid to take out and rob, this never would have ma the natnal news.”</p><p class="paywall">Tiffany had been shocked by the different exprsns on the fac of Aaron and Rsell. At a recent urt appearance she noted how Aaron’s grandmother waved to him, and he turned, grned, and wked.</p><p class="has-dropp paywall">Shortly after Aaron and Rsell were taken to ctody, Eiano Moral and Jeremy Herrera were put on the dg AZT. After his fight wh Aaron McKney, Eiano had gone to the hospal, where he required 21 stapl to repair his cut skull. The doctor explaed to him that Matthew Shepard had been H.I.V.-posive and that bee Eiano had had blood ntact wh the gun, which had been vered Matthew’s blood, there was a small chance that Eiano uld have been fected. The doctor said that he—as well as Jeremy, who had some abrasns on his hands—need to start an immediate urse of meditn.</p><p class="paywall">For some of those close to Aaron and Rsell the news about the risk of fectn helped them persua themselv that Matthew was actually the dangero one. Matthew had sced Aaron and Rsell to mtg a crime, and now his ghost was tryg to poison them. Deanna Johnson, who is a close iend of Rsell’s grandmother’s, says that she has “very mixed feelgs” about the crime. “You know that murr is wrong, but you feel basilly that [the homosexual] liftyle is not right…. Matthew was not a sat—Matthew and his liftyle. I heard he was havg tts done que equently…. I am not faiar wh people like that. Sometim I’ve heard when people have [AIDS] they want to take as many people wh them as possible.” She says that she didn’t thk “there were many gay people” Laramie. But after the murr “a lot of them me out of the woodwork.”</p><div data-attr-viewport-monor="le-recirc" class="le-recirc-wrapper le-recirc-observer-target-15 viewport-monor-anchor"></div><p class="paywall">Everywhere Wyomg, homosexualy is so near and so far away—visible and visible. As wh many prejudic, homophobia allows for dividual exceptns. Tyler Kern, who dated Matthew for a short time the fall, was also a iend of Chasy’s and ocsnally hung out wh her, Rsell, Aaron, and Kristen (although he never me out to them). Acrdg to sourc close to the fense, the fense plans to argue that neher Kristen nor Chasy grew up a homophobic atmosphere, and fact both had close fay members who were lbians. Chasy’s job at U.W. volved dog some cleril work for the L.G.B.T.A., and she was iendly wh Jim Osborn, who at the time chaired the group. There was speculatn about reprsed homoerotic sire between Aaron and Rsell; acrdg to this theory, they were bondg over mutilatg a betiful man.</p><p class="paywall">Aaron’s iend Odi don’t fd the fact that Aaron’s and Rsell’s girliends have close fay members who are lbians paradoxil. Like many people Laramie he thks lbianism is “much ls repulsive” than male homosexualy. At other tim, however, he thks “’s all wrong altogether … bee of God and what the Bible says.” He says that “Aaron believed God like most people.”</p><p class="paywall">“A kid on the street, they feel someone oppos them—’s him or them,” he says. “Anger is all men’s hearts; some are aaid to do what’s their hearts…. Ne tim out of 10 you’re aaid to do what you say you’re gog to do, and this time he wasn’t. Jt the right suatn, the right time.</p><p class="paywall">“What would I thk if I heard all the voic your head?” he asks me. “What would you thk if you heard me? Haven’t you ever wanted to h someone?”</p><p class="has-dropp paywall">It remas to be seen whether Matthew’s ath will endure as a symbol of the vlence of homophobia, but awarens of prejudice is part of the legacy of Matthew Shepard. Obvly, the killg was about homosexualy, perhaps sharpened by class envy and by dgs as well. But uld Aaron and Rsell have murred someone else for some other reason? They cracked open Eiano’s skull the same night while shoutg slurs. At the ept level, murr is simply about murr, about havg the pacy, rage, and will to do , and about fdg a victim who n be humanized by the shallowt of spells—“gay,” “faggot,” “fairy.” The spell seems to have been already wearg off by the time Aaron got home that night. “I serve to die,” he told Kristen, his victim growg ld, his feelgs returng to himself.</p><p class="has-dropp paywall">On December 28, District Attorney Cal Recha elected to seek the ath penalty agast both Aaron and Rsell. Some of Matthew’s iends wonr if was what he would want. Brian Goon rells how “when people would make ments, like ‘Hey, faggot,’ he wouldn’t react…. If anyone lived the Christian ial of turn the other cheek, was Matt. I scerely believe that Matt would have fiven those people.” But Judy says that Matthew believed the ath penalty for heo crim. “I believe my heart that if this had happened to a iend of Matt’s he would thk the ath penalty was jt.”</p><p class="paywall">She rells the way Aaron appeared at the hearg. “It looks like his ey are ad—ad si,” she says. “I believe evil. I believe there are people who have no souls. I believe there are people out there who have no feelg for what’s right or wrong—who enjoy hurtg others.”</p><p class="paywall">“Did [Matthew] ask you to stop?” the police had asked Aaron.</p><p class="paywall">“Well, yeah,” he replied, “he was gettg the sh kicked out of him.” Judy feels that if Aaron had any remorse he would not have ed that phrase to scribe what he did to her son. She also thks about how Aaron and Rsell took Matthew’s sho that night, as the rapists had done Moroc. “It was one of the tangible thgs he uld pot to that had been taken om him Moroc. He plaed about endlsly—‘my favore pair of sho.’ I had this visual image of Matt pleadg wh Aaron and Rsell not to take his sho.”</p><p class="has-dropp paywall">For Tiffany Edwards, the ia that Aaron and Rsell may have been exposed to H.I.V. om Matthew would be “Karmic, stant, ultimate jtice.”</p><p class="paywall">No one close to Matthew knew that he was H.I.V.-posive—or thks that he himself knew. The fectn, tected the hospal, is thought to have been a very recent one. Judy Shepard rells that sce the rape her son had been tted perdilly and the rults had been negative. Ta, Romae, and Brian all feel that Matthew—who supported Romae through her brother’s ath om AIDS—would have nfid them. “He wasn’t a secret-keeper,” his mother says. But there is a great al of ncern that, as Brian puts , the revelatn of his illns “uld be ed agast him somehow—make people thk his ath was ls tragic bee he was gog to die anyway.” H.I.V.-posive people often have to fight agast the stereotype of certa doom; Brian and others emphasize that a healthy young person like Matthew might live wh H.I.V. for s, by which time there may be a cure.</p><div data-attr-viewport-monor="le-recirc" class="le-recirc-wrapper le-recirc-observer-target-16 viewport-monor-anchor"></div><p class="paywall">Matthew’s iends agree that the stigmatizatn of people wh H.I.V. would not be somethg Matthew (who worked for AIDS ) would want to llaborate by censorg the fact of his fectn as if were shameful. His iends exprs the same hatn when speakg about some of his other troubl—his prsn and rape—fearg that the thgs uld also be obliquely blamed on the victim. But the people clost to Matthew are mted to rememberg him as he was. They have fah that, for most people, troubl make a portra more, not ls, human and epen the poignancy of a ath.</p><p class="paywall">“He wasn’t a sat,” Judy says. “He was jt a young man search of himself.” She is disturbed by parisons between Matthew and J. “You mt unrstand, ’s like puttg him on a pestal that jt won’t work,” she says. “I’m ncerned that if people fd out that ’s not te, they’ll be disappoted or angry or hate him.”</p><p class="paywall">Sce Matthew’s ath, his fay has received more than 8,000 letters and rds, all of which Judy plans to reply to. Prents ntue to arrive as well—mementos om the vigils, a quilt of signatur om a llege Ptsburgh, CDs, origal mic, poems, stuffed animals, angels, ornaments, books on grief.</p><p class="paywall">Many of the letters have enclosed checks, for small and large amounts, which has led Dennis and Judy to tablish the Matthew Shepard Foundatn to support thgs that Matthew believed —mental health, gay support groups, AIDS , human rights, homels teenagers. Many polil groups have been lobbyg for their support, but Dennis and Judy want to study issu such as hate-crime legislatn before takg a posn on them. Judy says she has never seen herself as someone who is fortable the public eye. Growg up the small town of Glenrock, Wyomg, Judy wanted to be jt what she beme. “I want to go back to my former reer as a hoewife and mom,” she says, “but I n’t. When Logan said this was Matt’s sty, I said to him, ‘What is our sty? 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article__body" data-journey-hook="client-ntent" data-ttid="BodyWrapper"><div class="body__ner-ntaer"><p class="paywall">Judy rells how, when Matthew would overdraw his bank acunt, “he’d say, ‘Someday when I’m rich, I’ll pay you back for all the overdrafts.’ And then he’d say, ‘Do you thk I’ll be rich? Do you thk I’ll be famo?’ I would say, ‘Absolutely—God would not put you through all this and not let you be famo.’”</p><p class="paywall">She is a strong woman: she cri equently, while talkg about Matthew, but she bsh the tears om her face and keeps talkg. Hers is the grief of one nfint of love given and received—so different om how one imag the grief of another mother: Cdy Dixon, stumblg through the snow knowg that her only son—a prisoner—had reportedly refed her vis. Rsell Henrson was not allowed to attend his mother’s funeral. It was feared the crowd would hurt him.</p><p class="has-dropp paywall">In Laramie, elementary-school kids signed and wore yellow rdboard badg which said that they had pledged never to hurt another person bee they were different om them. A graduate of Laramie High School says that she ed to ll her brother a fag whenever she was mad at him, but that recently her mother had told her not to e that word anymore.</p><p class="paywall">“We were the last group was O.K. to hate,” Kim Nash, a member of the L.G.B.T.A., says. “Bee of Matthew’s ath ’s a ltle ls O.K.”</p><p class="paywall">The Saturday followg the attack, the L.G.B.T.A. marched for Matthew at the homeg para after the football game. Although Matt Galloway was apprehensive, he went and marched, along wh hundreds of others, wearg yellow armbands and rryg NO HATE IN OUR STATE signs. “It was the greatt experience of my life,” he says. “People me up to me and thanked me.” After the killg, he got ught up talkg to the media, “but I had to e to terms wh Matthew’s ath for myself,” and on the first quiet day, “I went and locked myself my hoe and … cried for three hours straight.” He cid he wanted to get to know some of the gay muny, and he went to dner wh three of Matthew’s gay iends, “and they were some of the most betiful people I’ve ever met.” After his televisn appearanc he got some lls om gay men askg if he was available, and he found himself tellg them that he was straight, but that if they were terted beg iends, he was too.</p><div data-attr-viewport-monor="le-recirc" class="le-recirc-wrapper le-recirc-observer-target-17 viewport-monor-anchor"></div><p class="paywall">Ta Labrie stggl not to let herself be nsumed by sadns. “There are days I thk of jog Matt, but I know he’d be very disappoted if I showed up Heaven.” After Matthew’s ath she got permissn om her landlord to adopt Matthew’s t, Clayton. “I fally found the bt iend of a lifetime and then he’s gone. They stole my iend,” she said, her voice paed and puzzled.</p><p class="has-dropp paywall">Romae Patterson feels that the prs and the natnal attentn have “helped lift me out of the p of personal sorrow.” In the ffee shop where she works, she hears people discsg the murr—gay people and straight people. At a vigil Denver the day Matthew died, Romae stood on the steps of the pol ont of a photo of Matthew which was attached to a repli of the woon fence—a agile fense agast loss—and told the crowd: “The person Matthew was sh all your fac. I am sure Matthew feels your love. Thank you all for beg here tonight to help Matthew take one more step towards his goals and dreams.”</p><p class="paywall">Doc O’Connor remembers the phone ll he got om his mother the day Matthew was found. “Her voice is teary. I thk somebody my fay’s died. She says, ‘It’s such a shame about that Matthew Shepard—and you knew him.’ ”</p><p class="paywall">“I’d only known him four days,” he says, “but the thg is we had a good nnectn.” He says he remembers how Kristen didn’t seem upset when she told him that Aaron had beaten some gay guy. He knows that “Krissy might have got six months’ probatn if I didn’t tell the police what I knew…. I like her—she’s a nice girl—but she’s got to get her jt serts.”</p><p class="paywall">“Matthew knew he was gog to die,” Doc says. “He said he was gog to get beaten or strangled—he wasn’t sure which. The last time we talked, he said, ‘When I get done bee I’m gay, if one gay person and one straight person e together and stop to thk that we’re both people, that would be somethg’—he would have acplished somethg. And then, four days later, the whole untry together. He’s bigger than kgs and queens. One person told me he wanted to look up the Book of Revelatn. Matthew Shepard—that’s a pretty spirual name. Who do you know who is as big today—who reached out and touched as many people as Matthew Shepard of Laramie, Wyomg, populatn 27K?”</p></div></div></div><div class="GridItem-buujkM fVLMby grid--em grid-layout__asi"><div class="StickyBoxWrapper-jfYB jxBcTH sticky-box"><div class="StickyBoxPrimary-dzWDWL cdhYoN sticky-box__primary"><div class="AdWrapper-dQtivb fZrssQ ad ad--rail"><div class="ad__slot ad__slot--rail" data-no-id="z7xi7r"></div></div><div class="ConsumerMarketgUnThemedWrapper-iUTMTf jssHut nsumer-marketg-un nsumer-marketg-un--display-rail" role="prentatn" aria-hidn="te"><div class="nsumer-marketg-un__slot nsumer-marketg-un__slot--display-rail"></div><div class="journey-un"></div></div></div><div class="StickyBoxPlaceholr-grPmrg dxAvXx"></div></div></div></div></div><div class="GridWrapper-cAzTTK kHBDeH grid grid-margs grid-ems-2 PaywallInleBarrierWhWrapperGrid-fyrGfS kLQIUk grid-layout--adrail narrow wi-adrail"><div class="GridItem-buujkM stRKV grid--em 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class="RponsiveImagePicture-cWuUZO dUOtEa SummaryItemRponsiveAsset-hjGIGg bDvSkO summary-em__image rponsive-image"><noscript><source media="(max-width: 767px)" srcSet="" siz="100vw"/><source media="(m-width: 768px)" srcSet="" siz="100vw"/><img alt="Ezra Miller’s “Msiah” Delns: Insi The Flash Star’s Dark Spiral" class="RponsiveImageContaer-eybHBd fptoWY rponsive-image__image" src="></noscript></picture></div></div></span></a></div><div class="SummaryItemContent-eiDYMl XMZX summary-em__ntent"><div class="RubricWrapper-dKmCNX hXRWeY bric bric--disvery SummaryItemRubric-dguGKN lapGFj summary-em__bric"><span class="RubricName-fVtemz cLxcNi">Hollywood</span></div><a class="SummaryItemHedLk-civM cxlTHI summary-em-trackg__hed-lk summary-em__hed-lk" data-ponent-type="recirc-river" data-recirc-id="em-hed-1" data-recirc-pattern="summary-em" href=" target="_self"><div data-ttid="ClampWrapper" class="ClampWrapper-kZxfkB hTTNGO clamp SummaryItemHedBase-hiFYpQ drYWLe summary-em__hed"><div class="ClampContent-hilPkr jVhSBH"><div class="SummaryItemHedTag-TWblf gxaOcP" data-ttid="SummaryItemHed">Ezra Miller’s “Msiah” Delns: Insi <em>The Flash</em> Star’s Dark Spiral</div></div></div></a><div class="BaseWrap-sc-gjQpdd BaseText-ewhhUZ SummaryItemDek-CRfsi iUEiRd ijSOpT jDyfzW summary-em__k">They’re one of Hollywood’s brightt stars—and most troubled actors. Amid safety ncerns, and anxiety over the fate of a $200 ln movie, <em>VF</em> unearths disturbg new tails a saga of grandse sermons, guns, dgs, and alleged asslts and groomg.</div><div class="SummaryItemByleWrapper-boCfbi cuRXdL summary-em__byle-date-in"><div class="SummaryItemBaseByle-fFbXkY gRtaxp summary-em__byle"><div class="summary-em__byle__ntent"><div data-ttid="BylWrapper" class="BylWrapper-KIudk irTIfE byl"><p class="ByleWrapper-jWHrLH iNSiTG byle byl__byle" data-ttid="ByleWrapper" emProp="thor" emType="><span emProp="name" class="ByleNamWrapper-jbHncj fuDQVo"><span data-ttid="ByleName" class="ByleName-kwmrLn cYaBaU byle__name"><span class="BaseWrap-sc-gjQpdd BaseText-ewhhUZ BylePreamble-iJolpQ iUEiRd bIbWCO gnILss byle__preamble">By </span>Julie Miller</span></span></p></div></div></div></div></div></div><div class="SummaryItemWrapper-iwvBff gjCHLu summary-em summary-em--has-le summary-em--ARTICLE summary-em--no-in summary-em--text-align-left summary-em--layout-placement-text-below summary-em--layout-posn-image-left summary-em--layout-proportns-50-50 summary-em--si-by-si-align-center summary-em--si-by-si-image-right-mobile-false summary-em--standard SummaryCollectnGridSummaryItem-WColm ktxezM" role="button" tabx="0"><div class="SummaryItemAssetContaer-gwhFFH VOyg summary-em__asset-ntaer"><a class="SummaryItemImageLk-dshqxb cPpCwE summary-em__image-lk summary-em-trackg__image-lk" href=" aria-hidn="te" tabx="-1" data-ponent-type="recirc-river" data-recirc-id="em-image-2" data-recirc-pattern="summary-em" target="_self"><span class="SpanWrapper-umhxW kGxnNB rponsive-asset SummaryItemRponsiveAsset-hjGIGg bDvSkO summary-em__image"><div data-tt="aspect-rat-ntaer" class="AspectRatContaer-bJHpJz cCcPgL"><div class="aspect-rat--overlay-ntaer"><picture class="RponsiveImagePicture-cWuUZO dUOtEa SummaryItemRponsiveAsset-hjGIGg bDvSkO summary-em__image rponsive-image"><noscript><source media="(max-width: 767px)" srcSet="" siz="100vw"/><source media="(m-width: 768px)" srcSet="" siz="100vw"/><img alt="“Maybe It Wasn’t Vlent, but It Was Rape”: Constance Wu Is Ready to Tell Her Story" class="RponsiveImageContaer-eybHBd fptoWY rponsive-image__image" src="></noscript></picture></div></div></span></a></div><div class="SummaryItemContent-eiDYMl XMZX summary-em__ntent"><div class="RubricWrapper-dKmCNX hXRWeY bric bric--disvery SummaryItemRubric-dguGKN lapGFj summary-em__bric"><span class="RubricName-fVtemz cLxcNi">Movi</span></div><a class="SummaryItemHedLk-civM cxlTHI summary-em-trackg__hed-lk summary-em__hed-lk" data-ponent-type="recirc-river" data-recirc-id="em-hed-2" data-recirc-pattern="summary-em" href=" target="_self"><div data-ttid="ClampWrapper" class="ClampWrapper-kZxfkB hTTNGO clamp SummaryItemHedBase-hiFYpQ drYWLe summary-em__hed"><div class="ClampContent-hilPkr jVhSBH"><div class="SummaryItemHedTag-TWblf gxaOcP" data-ttid="SummaryItemHed">“Maybe It Wasn’t Vlent, but It Was Rape”: Constance Wu Is Ready to Tell Her Story</div></div></div></a><div class="BaseWrap-sc-gjQpdd BaseText-ewhhUZ SummaryItemDek-CRfsi iUEiRd ijSOpT jDyfzW summary-em__k">When she was her 20s, the star of <em>Crazy Rich Asians</em> was raped. In this powerful excerpt om her memoir, <em>Makg a Scene,</em> she wonrs why took her so long to regnize that.</div><div class="SummaryItemByleWrapper-boCfbi cuRXdL summary-em__byle-date-in"><div class="SummaryItemBaseByle-fFbXkY gRtaxp summary-em__byle"><div class="summary-em__byle__ntent"><div data-ttid="BylWrapper" class="BylWrapper-KIudk irTIfE byl"><p class="ByleWrapper-jWHrLH iNSiTG byle byl__byle" data-ttid="ByleWrapper" emProp="thor" emType="><span emProp="name" class="ByleNamWrapper-jbHncj fuDQVo"><span data-ttid="ByleName" class="ByleName-kwmrLn cYaBaU byle__name"><span class="BaseWrap-sc-gjQpdd BaseText-ewhhUZ BylePreamble-iJolpQ iUEiRd bIbWCO gnILss byle__preamble">By </span>Constance Wu</span></span></p></div></div></div></div></div></div><div class="SummaryItemWrapper-iwvBff gjCHLu summary-em summary-em--has-le summary-em--ARTICLE summary-em--no-in summary-em--text-align-left summary-em--layout-placement-text-below summary-em--layout-posn-image-left summary-em--layout-proportns-50-50 summary-em--si-by-si-align-center summary-em--si-by-si-image-right-mobile-false summary-em--standard SummaryCollectnGridSummaryItem-WColm ktxezM" role="button" tabx="0"><div class="SummaryItemAssetContaer-gwhFFH VOyg summary-em__asset-ntaer"><a class="SummaryItemImageLk-dshqxb cPpCwE summary-em__image-lk summary-em-trackg__image-lk" href=" aria-hidn="te" tabx="-1" data-ponent-type="recirc-river" data-recirc-id="em-image-3" data-recirc-pattern="summary-em" target="_self"><span class="SpanWrapper-umhxW kGxnNB rponsive-asset SummaryItemRponsiveAsset-hjGIGg bDvSkO summary-em__image"><div data-tt="aspect-rat-ntaer" class="AspectRatContaer-bJHpJz cCcPgL"><div class="aspect-rat--overlay-ntaer"><picture class="RponsiveImagePicture-cWuUZO dUOtEa SummaryItemRponsiveAsset-hjGIGg bDvSkO summary-em__image rponsive-image"><noscript><source media="(max-width: 767px)" srcSet="" siz="100vw"/><source media="(m-width: 768px)" srcSet="" siz="100vw"/><img alt="“Fuck Bin,” “Don’t Tread on Me,” and a Wisns Death Trip for Our Tim" class="RponsiveImageContaer-eybHBd fptoWY rponsive-image__image" src="></noscript></picture></div></div></span></a></div><div class="SummaryItemContent-eiDYMl XMZX summary-em__ntent"><div class="RubricWrapper-dKmCNX hXRWeY bric bric--disvery SummaryItemRubric-dguGKN lapGFj summary-em__bric"><span class="RubricName-fVtemz cLxcNi">Polics</span></div><a class="SummaryItemHedLk-civM cxlTHI summary-em-trackg__hed-lk summary-em__hed-lk" data-ponent-type="recirc-river" data-recirc-id="em-hed-3" data-recirc-pattern="summary-em" href=" target="_self"><div data-ttid="ClampWrapper" class="ClampWrapper-kZxfkB hTTNGO clamp SummaryItemHedBase-hiFYpQ drYWLe summary-em__hed"><div class="ClampContent-hilPkr jVhSBH"><div class="SummaryItemHedTag-TWblf gxaOcP" data-ttid="SummaryItemHed">“Fuck Bin,” “Don’t Tread on Me,” and a Wisns Death Trip for Our Tim</div></div></div></a><div class="BaseWrap-sc-gjQpdd BaseText-ewhhUZ SummaryItemDek-CRfsi iUEiRd ijSOpT jDyfzW summary-em__k">The thor knocks on the doors bearg the darkt symbols, behd which lie guns, ammo, antisemism, antiabortn dogma—and a belief the g civil war.</div><div class="SummaryItemByleWrapper-boCfbi cuRXdL summary-em__byle-date-in"><div class="SummaryItemBaseByle-fFbXkY gRtaxp summary-em__byle"><div class="summary-em__byle__ntent"><div data-ttid="BylWrapper" class="BylWrapper-KIudk irTIfE byl"><p class="ByleWrapper-jWHrLH iNSiTG byle byl__byle" data-ttid="ByleWrapper" emProp="thor" emType="><span emProp="name" class="ByleNamWrapper-jbHncj fuDQVo"><span data-ttid="ByleName" class="ByleName-kwmrLn cYaBaU byle__name"><span class="BaseWrap-sc-gjQpdd BaseText-ewhhUZ BylePreamble-iJolpQ iUEiRd bIbWCO gnILss byle__preamble">By </span>Jeff Sharlet</span></span></p></div></div></div></div></div></div><div class="AdWrapper-dQtivb fZrssQ SummaryCollectnGridSummaryItem-WColm ktxezM ad ad--read-more"><div class="ad__slot ad__slot--read-more" data-no-id="0q9x1g"></div></div><div class="SummaryItemWrapper-iwvBff gjCHLu summary-em summary-em--has-le summary-em--ARTICLE summary-em--no-in summary-em--text-align-left summary-em--layout-placement-text-below summary-em--layout-posn-image-left summary-em--layout-proportns-50-50 summary-em--si-by-si-align-center summary-em--si-by-si-image-right-mobile-false summary-em--standard SummaryCollectnGridSummaryItem-WColm ktxezM" role="button" tabx="0"><div class="SummaryItemAssetContaer-gwhFFH VOyg summary-em__asset-ntaer"><a class="SummaryItemImageLk-dshqxb cPpCwE summary-em__image-lk summary-em-trackg__image-lk" href=" aria-hidn="te" tabx="-1" data-ponent-type="recirc-river" data-recirc-id="em-image-4" data-recirc-pattern="summary-em" target="_self"><span class="SpanWrapper-umhxW kGxnNB rponsive-asset SummaryItemRponsiveAsset-hjGIGg bDvSkO summary-em__image"><div data-tt="aspect-rat-ntaer" class="AspectRatContaer-bJHpJz cCcPgL"><div class="aspect-rat--overlay-ntaer"><picture class="RponsiveImagePicture-cWuUZO dUOtEa SummaryItemRponsiveAsset-hjGIGg bDvSkO summary-em__image rponsive-image"><noscript><source media="(max-width: 767px)" srcSet="" siz="100vw"/><source media="(m-width: 768px)" srcSet="" siz="100vw"/><img alt="Lizzo Is Here to Talk About All of It&-That Flute, That Lyric, Her Man, and More" class="RponsiveImageContaer-eybHBd fptoWY rponsive-image__image" src="></noscript></picture></div></div></span></a></div><div class="SummaryItemContent-eiDYMl XMZX summary-em__ntent"><div class="RubricWrapper-dKmCNX hXRWeY bric bric--disvery SummaryItemRubric-dguGKN lapGFj summary-em__bric"><span class="RubricName-fVtemz cLxcNi">Celebry</span></div><a class="SummaryItemHedLk-civM cxlTHI summary-em-trackg__hed-lk summary-em__hed-lk" data-ponent-type="recirc-river" data-recirc-id="em-hed-4" data-recirc-pattern="summary-em" href=" target="_self"><div data-ttid="ClampWrapper" class="ClampWrapper-kZxfkB hTTNGO clamp SummaryItemHedBase-hiFYpQ drYWLe summary-em__hed"><div class="ClampContent-hilPkr jVhSBH"><div class="SummaryItemHedTag-TWblf gxaOcP" data-ttid="SummaryItemHed">Lizzo Is Here to Talk About All of It—That Flute, That Lyric, Her Man, and More</div></div></div></a><div class="BaseWrap-sc-gjQpdd BaseText-ewhhUZ SummaryItemDek-CRfsi iUEiRd ijSOpT jDyfzW summary-em__k">The Emmy- and Grammy-wng superstar fltist giv <em>Vany Fair</em> sight to her art, and the nuanc of posivy.</div><div class="SummaryItemByleWrapper-boCfbi cuRXdL summary-em__byle-date-in"><div class="SummaryItemBaseByle-fFbXkY gRtaxp summary-em__byle"><div class="summary-em__byle__ntent"><div data-ttid="BylWrapper" class="BylWrapper-KIudk irTIfE byl"><p class="ByleWrapper-jWHrLH iNSiTG byle byl__byle" data-ttid="ByleWrapper" emProp="thor" emType="><span emProp="name" class="ByleNamWrapper-jbHncj fuDQVo"><span data-ttid="ByleName" class="ByleName-kwmrLn cYaBaU byle__name"><span class="BaseWrap-sc-gjQpdd BaseText-ewhhUZ BylePreamble-iJolpQ iUEiRd bIbWCO gnILss byle__preamble">By </span>Lisa 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class="nsumer-marketg-un__slot nsumer-marketg-un__slot--paywall-bar-ll-to-actn"></div><div class="journey-un"></div></div></asi></div><div class="SpaceHolr-oayp fXtswJ ad-height-hold"></div><div class="StickyHeroAdWrapper-eNLJUc gStsdY ad-stickyhero ad-stickyhero--standard ad-stickyhero-enable-mobile should-hold-space"><div class="AdWrapper-dQtivb fZrssQ ad ad--hero"><div class="ad__slot ad__slot--hero" data-no-id="bcqxc8"></div></div><div class="ConsumerMarketgUnThemedWrapper-iUTMTf jssHut nsumer-marketg-un nsumer-marketg-un--display-hero" role="prentatn" aria-hidn="te"><div class="nsumer-marketg-un__slot nsumer-marketg-un__slot--display-hero"></div><div class="journey-un"></div></div></div><div class="SpaceHolr-oayp fXtswJ ad-height-hold"></div><ma id="ma-ntent" tabx="-1" class="BasePageMaContent-kFvAuh ewPCZH page__ma-ntent"><article class="article ma-ntent" lang="en-US"><div class="ArticlePageLeBackground-EufvU tFsh"><hear class="ContentHearWrapper-clujbs cHjRrO ntent-hear article__ntent-hear"><div data-ttid="ContentHearContaer" class="ContentHearContaer-cGKRbE knDxNq"><div class="ContentHearHedAccredatnWrapper-GFiQf cDNVlV"><div data-ttid="ContentHearTleBlockWrapper" class="ContentHearTleBlockWrapper-cjmSKp ikebRK"><div data-ttid="ContentHearRubric" class="ContentHearRubricBlock-LmpbT hjnEYM"><div data-ttid="ContentHearRubricDateBlock" class="ContentHearRubricDateBlock-kAQcZP fTFWxD"><div class="RubricWrapper-dKmCNX iJOI bric ContentHearRubricContaer-eTudtt edKnIL"><a class="RubricLk-gRWSOU kImecF bric__lk" href="/news"><span class="RubricName-fVtemz cLxcNi">News</span></a></div></div><div class="RubricWrapper-dKmCNX iJOI bric ContentHearRubricIssueDate-CuIT fFtVss"><span class="RubricName-fVtemz cLxcNi">March 1999 Issue</span></div></div><h1 data-ttid="ContentHearHed" class="BaseWrap-sc-gjQpdd BaseText-ewhhUZ ContentHearHed-NCyCC iUEiRd khNpd gydgrM">The Ccifixn of Matthew Shepard</h1><span class="ContentHearContentDivir-liIxwf eicslv"></span></div><div class="ContentHearAccredatn-lfctVB etVsnJ ntent-hear__accredatn" data-ttid="ContentHearAccredatn"><div class="ContentHearDek-bIqFFZ fYeNbg">Tied to a woon fence, tortured, and left to die, 21-year-old Matthew Shepard—a bright, sensive hman at the Universy of Wyomg—has bee a natnal symbol of vlence agast gays. His killers, Aaron McKney and Rsell Henrson, products of a grim world of dgs, alhol, broken hom, and twisted dreams, have been charged wh first-gree murr. And the town of Laramie, home to all three, stands revealed as an Amerin paradox: a God-fearg, iendly place that harbors ep and lgerg prejudice. Melanie Thernstrom explor the hidn topography of a killg.</div><div class="ContentHearByle-kmPyCa emiglw"><div class="ContentHearByleContent-dpPmNn DRFq"><div data-ttid="BylWrapper" class="BylWrapper-KIudk irTIfE byl ContentHearByl-cZqgyJ bHLeKI"></div><time data-ttid="ContentHearPublishDate" dateTime="2014-01-08T13:42:36-05:00" class="BaseWrap-sc-gjQpdd BaseText-ewhhUZ ContentHearPublishDate-eIBicG iUEiRd bSlZUC cmPkTr">January 8, 2014</time></div></div></div></div></div></hear></div><div data-attribute-verso-pattern="article-body" class="ArticlePageContentBackGround-cNiFNN gVjmSM article-body__ntent"><div class="ActnBarWrapperContent-lasBkU cAHp"><div class="ActnBarWrapperComponent-cjwxLS bEeSLb"><div data-attr-viewport-monor="" class="ActnBarWrapper-dhxmQh izlawS viewport-monor-anchor"><button id="bookmark" aria-label="Save" class="ActnBarButton-dyFOZU foKBbl bookmark large-screen"><span class="ActnBarSendaryButtonPrimaryIn-isbvyN cAwccV bookmark-button-in"><svg class="in in-bookmark" width="24" height="24" viewBox="0 0 24 24" fill="none" xmlns="><tle>Save this story</tle><path class="in-bookmark-stroke" d="M11.7661 16.3228L4.5 20.1695V3.5H19.5V20.1695L12.2339 16.3228L12 16.199L11.7661 16.3228Z" stroke-lep="square"/></svg></span><span class="BaseWrap-sc-gjQpdd BaseText-ewhhUZ ActnBarButtonText-bYXYuh iUEiRd kdAzed gkccfO">Save</span></button></div><div data-attr-viewport-monor="" class="ActnBarWrapper-dhxmQh ledqMp viewport-monor-anchor"><button id="bookmark" aria-label="Save" class="ActnBarButton-dyFOZU ePWKOF bookmark mobile"><span class="ActnBarSendaryButtonPrimaryIn-isbvyN cAwccV bookmark-button-in"><svg class="in in-bookmark" width="24" height="24" viewBox="0 0 24 24" fill="none" xmlns="><tle>Save this story</tle><path class="in-bookmark-stroke" d="M11.7661 16.3228L4.5 20.1695V3.5H19.5V20.1695L12.2339 16.3228L12 16.199L11.7661 16.3228Z" stroke-lep="square"/></svg></span><span class="BaseWrap-sc-gjQpdd BaseText-ewhhUZ ActnBarButtonText-bYXYuh iUEiRd kdAzed gkccfO">Save</span></button></div></div></div><div class="ArticlePageChunksContent-etcMtP bwyLBj"><div data-ttid="ArticlePageChunks" class="ArticlePageChunks-fLyCVG hdASCv"><div class="GridWrapper-cAzTTK kHBDeH grid grid-margs grid-ems-2 ArticlePageChunksGrid-hfxa bjczjj grid-layout--adrail narrow wi-adrail"><div class="GridItem-buujkM stRKV grid--em grid-layout__ntent"><div class="BodyWrapper-kufPGa lnwCqV body body__ntaer article__body" data-journey-hook="client-ntent" data-ttid="BodyWrapper"><div class="body__ner-ntaer"><p class="has-dropp">The first time Doc O’Connor met Matthew Shepard, the 21-year-old Universy of Wyomg hman approached Doc’s silver limoe outsi a fé downtown Laramie. “Hi,” he said. “My name’s Matt. I’m gay and I want to go to a gay bar Fort Colls. Do you have a problem wh that?”</p><p>“No, I don’t have a problem wh that,” Doc told him. “I have a problem wh people who don’t pay!” The limo driver lghs, rememberg—a ep belly lgh. Doc, a stout 50-year-old man wh a beard, gray-black hair slicked back, and wboy boots, is the owner of Doc’s Class Act Limoe Service, as well as Doc’s Wtern Village, and most of the town of Bosler—a blk of a place 18 north of Laramie nsistg of board-up storeonts and yg woon ho.</p><p class="paywall">On Friday, October 2, Doc drove Matthew, who was ut about drkg and drivg, and the young man’s iend Ta Labrie the 70 to Fort Colls, Colorado, and back. (There are no openly gay bars Wyomg.) Matthew told Doc to ll him Matt, rather than Sir or Mr. Shepard, and asked him not to open the door for him. The followg Monday, Matthew lled om downtown and asked the olr man to pick him up. He sat up ont the limoe wh Doc, who said he had been on his way to Subway to get a sandwich. Matthew asked if he uld go wh him.</p><div class="Contaer-bkChBi byNLHx"></div><p class="paywall">They stayed at the rtrant for two hours, talkg. Doc had recently set up a Web se for his bs: “Matt was really to puters, and I’m jt a 10th-gra dropout,” Doc says. “He told me all about Sdi Arabia,” where his parents live, and what kd of guy he liked. “He said, ‘Doc, don’t take offense, but I wouldn’t go wh you. You’re not my type and you’re too old!’” Doc rells, sg. “He told me about Cody and gettg his jaw bted.” (Last summer Cody, Wyomg, he had been beaten by a bartenr who said Matthew had ma a pass at him.) Doc asked, “‘What did you do to the people who beat the sh out of you?’ He said, ‘I fave them and went on wh my life.’ Then he paid for my dner. He was a real nice guy, Matt.”</p><div class="AdWrapper-dQtivb fZrssQ ad ad---ntent"><div class="ad__slot ad__slot---ntent" data-no-id="20kpri"></div></div><p class="paywall">On Tuday, Matthew lled Doc om the Library, a lol bar; he wanted the limoe that night to go someplace wh some iends. Doc was supposed to attend an Eagl Club tste meetg, but said he’d try. They spoke aga early the eveng, and Doc told Matthew to ll back later that night, but he didn’t hear om him. Wednday morng, Doc lled him, but Matthew’s cell phone rang and rang.</p><div><div class="ConsumerMarketgUnThemedWrapper-iUTMTf jssHut nsumer-marketg-un nsumer-marketg-un--article-mid-ntent" role="prentatn" aria-hidn="te"><div class="nsumer-marketg-un__slot nsumer-marketg-un__slot--article-mid-ntent nsumer-marketg-un__slot---ntent"></div><div class="journey-un"></div></div></div><p class="paywall">At 4:25 P.M. outsi a nvenience store, Doc bumped to Kristen Price, a blon 18-year-old who was rryg her fant son her arms. Kristen and her boyiend, Aaron McKney—who was awag sentencg on a burglary nvictn—had recently moved out of an apartment attached to one of Doc’s buildgs Bosler.</p><div data-attr-viewport-monor="le-recirc" class="le-recirc-wrapper le-recirc-observer-target-1 viewport-monor-anchor"></div><p class="paywall">“I’m askg how did Aaron size up to this al [the sentencg],” he rells, “and she told me he’s gettg probatn, he’s gog to pay off. Then she says there’s somethg else, a new problem. ‘They’re gog to get him for attempted murr—for beatg some gay guy up.’”</p><p class="paywall">“Honey,” Doc told her, “ the state of Wyomg you don’t go to jail for beatg on a gay guy.”</p><p class="paywall">Although Doc had been tryg to reach Matthew all that day, didn’t occur to him that Kristen would have been talkg about Matthew.</p><p class="paywall">Two hours after Doc’s nversatn wh Kristen, a passg cyclist saw what he thought was a srecrow lashed to a woon buck fence on a remote plot of land. The srecrow turned out to be Matthew, unnsc, a huge gash his head, his face drenched wh blood except where his tear trails had washed clean. 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byl"><p class="ByleWrapper-jWHrLH iNSiTG byle byl__byle" data-ttid="ByleWrapper" emProp="thor" emType="><span emProp="name" class="ByleNamWrapper-jbHncj fuDQVo"><span data-ttid="ByleName" class="ByleName-kwmrLn cYaBaU byle__name"><span class="BaseWrap-sc-gjQpdd BaseText-ewhhUZ BylePreamble-iJolpQ iUEiRd bIbWCO gnILss byle__preamble">By </span>Mike Hogan</span></span></p></div></div></div></div></div></div></li><li><div class="SummaryItemWrapper-iwvBff doDafW summary-em summary-em--has-borr summary-em--ARTICLE summary-em--no-in summary-em--text-align-left summary-em--layout-placement-si-by-si summary-em--layout-posn-image-left summary-em--layout-proportns-33-66 summary-em--si-by-si-align-center summary-em--si-by-si-image-right-mobile-false summary-em--standard RecircMostPopularSummaryItem-jQxxiw jkeAv" role="button" tabx="0"><div class="SummaryItemAssetContaer-gwhFFH VOyg summary-em__asset-ntaer"><a class="SummaryItemImageLk-dshqxb cPpCwE summary-em__image-lk summary-em-trackg__image-lk" href=" aria-hidn="te" tabx="-1" data-ponent-type="recirc-river" data-recirc-id="em-image-3" data-recirc-pattern="summary-em" target="_self"><span class="SpanWrapper-umhxW kGxnNB rponsive-asset SummaryItemRponsiveAsset-hjGIGg egpoQR summary-em__image"><div data-tt="aspect-rat-ntaer" class="AspectRatContaer-bJHpJz cCcPgL"><div class="aspect-rat--overlay-ntaer"><picture class="RponsiveImagePicture-cWuUZO dUOtEa SummaryItemRponsiveAsset-hjGIGg egpoQR summary-em__image rponsive-image"><noscript><source media="(max-width: 767px)" srcSet="" siz="100vw"/><source media="(m-width: 768px)" srcSet="" siz="100vw"/><img alt="Red, Whe & Royal Blue May Be “the Most Expensive B of Fan Fictn Ever”" class="RponsiveImageContaer-eybHBd fptoWY rponsive-image__image" src="></noscript></picture></div></div></span></a></div><div class="SummaryItemContent-eiDYMl XMZX summary-em__ntent summary-em__ntent--no-bric"><a class="SummaryItemHedLk-civM fPFrPI summary-em-trackg__hed-lk summary-em__hed-lk" data-ponent-type="recirc-river" data-recirc-id="em-hed-3" data-recirc-pattern="summary-em" href=" target="_self"><div data-ttid="ClampWrapper" class="ClampWrapper-kZxfkB hTTNGO clamp SummaryItemHedBase-hiFYpQ hRVxvR summary-em__hed"><div class="ClampContent-hilPkr jVhSBH"><div class="SummaryItemHedTag-TWblf gxaOcP" data-ttid="SummaryItemHed"><em>Red, Whe & Royal Blue</em> May Be “the Most Expensive B of Fan Fictn Ever”</div></div></div></a><div class="SummaryItemByleWrapper-boCfbi cuRXdL summary-em__byle-date-in"><div class="SummaryItemBaseByle-fFbXkY gRtaxp summary-em__byle"><div class="summary-em__byle__ntent"><div data-ttid="BylWrapper" class="BylWrapper-KIudk irTIfE byl"><p class="ByleWrapper-jWHrLH iNSiTG byle byl__byle" data-ttid="ByleWrapper" emProp="thor" emType="><span emProp="name" class="ByleNamWrapper-jbHncj fuDQVo"><span data-ttid="ByleName" class="ByleName-kwmrLn cYaBaU byle__name"><span class="BaseWrap-sc-gjQpdd BaseText-ewhhUZ BylePreamble-iJolpQ iUEiRd bIbWCO gnILss byle__preamble">By </span>Savannah Walsh</span></span></p></div></div></div></div></div></div></li><li><div class="AdWrapper-dQtivb fZrssQ RecircMostPopularSummaryItem-jQxxiw fHLKqj ad ad--asi"><div class="ad__slot ad__slot--asi" data-no-id="lyq9ew"></div></div></li></ul><div class="RecircMostPopularFooter-enPjgs eAuebe"></div></div></div></div><div class="StickyBoxPlaceholr-grPmrg dxAvXx"></div></div></div></div><div class="RowWrapper-UmqTg HEhan full-bleed-ad row-mid-ntent-ad"><div class="StickyMidContentAdWrapper-fSBzwl drzyIa ad-stickymidntent"><div class="AdWrapper-dQtivb fZrssQ ad ad--mid-ntent should-hold-space"><div class="ad__slot ad__slot--mid-ntent" data-no-id="cvmuye"></div></div></div></div><div class="GridWrapper-cAzTTK kHBDeH grid grid-margs grid-ems-2 ArticlePageChunksGrid-hfxa bjczjj grid-layout--adrail narrow wi-adrail"><div class="GridItem-buujkM stRKV grid--em grid-layout__ntent"><div class="BodyWrapper-kufPGa lnwCqV body body__ntaer article__body" data-journey-hook="client-ntent" data-ttid="BodyWrapper"><div class="body__ner-ntaer"><p class="paywall">After police qutng, Aaron McKney nfsed that he and his iend Rsell Henrson had met Matthew at the Firi Bar & Lounge on Tuday night and posed as gay to lure him to their tck. Then they drove him to an out-of-the-way lotn, bound him to a fence, pistol-whipped him, and tnted him while he begged for his life. Then they abandoned the gentle five-foot-two, 105-pound hman to hang alone for 18 hours, losg blood as the temperature dropped.</p><p class="paywall">On Friday, Doc picked up the paper and was faced wh a horrible realizatn: the gay guy Kristen had been talkg about was Matthew. Moreover, as the story broke on the ont pag of newspapers across the untry, a chillg chronology beme clear: “They found him at 6:30 on Wednday,” Doc says. “So Krissy told me this while Matt was still stng up.”</p><p class="has-dropp paywall">Although the memorial servic have passed by the time I arrive Laramie, 10 days after his ath, and the natnal prs has moved on, the tragedy reverberat everywhere, HAS MATTHEW SHEPARD’S DEATH LEFT YOU FEELING CONFUSED, ANGRY, FRIGHTENED … ? posters ask. An enormo banner at the Democratic headquarters proclaims, THOUGHTS AND PRAYERS WITH MATTHEW, bi re-electn signs for Cal Recha, the district attorney charge of prosecutg the se. Other bs announce, VIOLENCE IS NOT OUR VALUE.</p><p class="paywall">“This is a great muny: welg, open, fay-oriented—good people,” Laramie chief of police Bill Ware tells me. “People are tstg—that’s that wtern attu…. We are what Ameri ed to be. And we want to stay that way.</p><p class="paywall">“I’m not gog to get to the diversy issue,” he says, bshg asi qutns about Matthew. “That’s gog to take me a place I don’t want to be.” The chief hands me a rd wh a picture that shows him standg his uniform, one hand rtg on his clean whe police r. The back of the rd says that Chief Ware is “a proud hband, father and grandfather” who “sgs Christian gospel.”</p><div data-attr-viewport-monor="le-recirc" class="le-recirc-wrapper le-recirc-observer-target-2 viewport-monor-anchor"></div><p class="paywall">“Are you married?” he asks me. “You should move out here, fd a wboy, and have kids!”</p><p class="has-dropp paywall">While the killg has been terpreted as a sick attempt to prerve the Old Wt—to rid the town of the tr whose prence threatens tradnal life—the crime’s most strikg element is the enormy of the change this sgle act of vlence has wrought.</p><p class="paywall">“This is the nict place I’ve ever lived. There’s somethg magil here,” says Tiffany Edwards, a pretty, part-Cherokee 22-year-old who has wrten most of the Shepard verage for <em>The Laramie Daily Boomerang</em>, the town paper. “That’s part of what’s so upsettg about all this—for me personally and our town.”</p><p class="paywall">The magic is not the scenery. Unlike most of the state, Laramie is not blsed s landspe. Fifty wt of Wyomg’s pal cy, Cheyenne, ss a flat, treels sweep of high plas bised by bad weather, s mountas mostly hidn. Found 1868 as a railway town, the impoverished cy is still divid to east and wt by a eight le. Wh the ranchg dtry cle, employment here is domated by the Universy of Wyomg. About 90 percent of the populatn is whe; the median annual hoehold e is $24,080; reportedly, 20 percent of the rints live below the poverty le.</p><p class="paywall">Laramie is, however, the iendlit place I have ever been Ameri. When I arrived at the miature airport, other passengers me up and offered me a ri. Although I’m on an expense acunt durg my stay, people ok me meat loaf.</p><p class="paywall">There is a llective sorrow here: the week followg the ath, 1,000 people me to a sgle vigil on the ont lawn of the St. Pl’s Newman Catholic Universy Center. The cy uncil passed a rolutn llg “for the muny to exprs sympathy, to reflect on our loss and to beg a healg procs.”</p><p class="paywall">Mary Elizabeth Galvan, the fense lawyer for Rsell Henrson’s girliend, Chasy Pasley (who plead guilty as an accsory to murr), don’t want to ment on her client, but tears form her ey as she speaks about Matthew and his parents. “As a mother, breaks my heart. The thought of his parents on that long plane ri back om Sdi Arabia, whout even privacy, while their son was dyg the hospal.”</p><p class="paywall">Amidst the grief, there is an unrcurrent of rentment. Some townspeople feel angry that the slayg is beg “blamed” on them: they feel has been “blown out of proportn” and “ed by the gay-rights movement for polil purpos.” U.W. stunt Shelley Barton puts this way: “Everyone tak note of bee happened Wyomg, and then sudnly ’s ma to be typil of Wyomg: ‘Oh, ’s a redneck place—we expected .’”</p><p class="paywall">“It’s like spillg the pat on the clean rpet is a bigger al than spillg pat on a dirty rpet,” a lol worker is quoted as sayg the <em>Boomerang.</em> “Like this don’t happen anywhere else.”</p><p class="has-dropp paywall">Hate-crime legislatn has failed to pass Wyomg three years a row. The media’s lkage of the state’s polics and Matthew’s ath furiat many townspeople. Yet disavowals are suffed wh a sense of pable moral rponsibily and the necsy for atonement.</p><p class="paywall">Many Laramie rints scribe themselv as not homophobic. One rint explas: “We don’t have phobias—we have valu.” But people mock gay reporters sent to ver the crime. “I’m om the <em>San Francis Chronicle</em>,” they imate unselfnscly, assumg fey voic. Many people sist that homosexualy is “not for me to judge.” But when they are asked, “What’s to judge?” their answers bee nvoluted.</p><div data-attr-viewport-monor="le-recirc" class="le-recirc-wrapper le-recirc-observer-target-3 viewport-monor-anchor"></div><p class="paywall">Some people sist on makg a distctn between nmng the s and nmng the sner, separatg “the homosexual liftyle” om “the gay person.” Most people feel that Matthew Shepard did not reprent that ntemptible liftyle. A number of rints told me that they nsir Matthew Shepard the first gay person they ever “met.” And the fact that the “meetgs” took place after his ath seems to have ma them all the more signifint.</p></div></div></div><div class="GridItem-buujkM fVLMby grid--em grid-layout__asi"><div class="StickyBoxWrapper-jfYB jxBcTH sticky-box"><div class="StickyBoxPrimary-dzWDWL cdhYoN sticky-box__primary"><div class="AdWrapper-dQtivb fZrssQ ad ad--rail"><div class="ad__slot ad__slot--rail" data-no-id="1y0396"></div></div><div class="ConsumerMarketgUnThemedWrapper-iUTMTf jssHut nsumer-marketg-un nsumer-marketg-un--display-rail" role="prentatn" aria-hidn="te"><div class="nsumer-marketg-un__slot nsumer-marketg-un__slot--display-rail"></div><div class="journey-un"></div></div><div data-attr-viewport-monor="" class="RecircMostPopularWrapper-bRuGTi jkTTgR recirc-most-popular-wrapper viewport-monor-anchor"><div class="RecircMostPopularConter-jiViNn ktrplG recirc-most-popular-sparrow-trackg hi-asi-ad" 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summary-em__ntent--no-bric"><a class="SummaryItemHedLk-civM fPFrPI summary-em-trackg__hed-lk summary-em__hed-lk" data-ponent-type="recirc-river" data-recirc-id="em-hed-3" data-recirc-pattern="summary-em" href=" target="_self"><div data-ttid="ClampWrapper" class="ClampWrapper-kZxfkB hTTNGO clamp SummaryItemHedBase-hiFYpQ hRVxvR summary-em__hed"><div class="ClampContent-hilPkr jVhSBH"><div class="SummaryItemHedTag-TWblf gxaOcP" data-ttid="SummaryItemHed"><em>Red, Whe & Royal Blue</em> May Be “the Most Expensive B of Fan Fictn Ever”</div></div></div></a><div class="SummaryItemByleWrapper-boCfbi cuRXdL summary-em__byle-date-in"><div class="SummaryItemBaseByle-fFbXkY gRtaxp summary-em__byle"><div class="summary-em__byle__ntent"><div data-ttid="BylWrapper" class="BylWrapper-KIudk irTIfE byl"><p class="ByleWrapper-jWHrLH iNSiTG byle byl__byle" data-ttid="ByleWrapper" emProp="thor" emType="><span emProp="name" class="ByleNamWrapper-jbHncj fuDQVo"><span data-ttid="ByleName" class="ByleName-kwmrLn cYaBaU byle__name"><span class="BaseWrap-sc-gjQpdd BaseText-ewhhUZ BylePreamble-iJolpQ iUEiRd bIbWCO gnILss byle__preamble">By </span>Savannah Walsh</span></span></p></div></div></div></div></div></div></li><li><div class="AdWrapper-dQtivb fZrssQ RecircMostPopularSummaryItem-jQxxiw fHLKqj ad ad--asi"><div class="ad__slot ad__slot--asi" data-no-id="r4v2rp"></div></div></li></ul><div class="RecircMostPopularFooter-enPjgs eAuebe"></div></div></div></div><div class="StickyBoxPlaceholr-grPmrg dxAvXx"></div></div></div></div><div class="RowWrapper-UmqTg HEhan full-bleed-ad row-mid-ntent-ad"><div class="StickyMidContentAdWrapper-fSBzwl drzyIa ad-stickymidntent"><div class="AdWrapper-dQtivb fZrssQ ad ad--mid-ntent should-hold-space"><div class="ad__slot ad__slot--mid-ntent" data-no-id="90svek"></div></div></div></div><div class="GridWrapper-cAzTTK kHBDeH grid grid-margs grid-ems-2 ArticlePageChunksGrid-hfxa bjczjj grid-layout--adrail narrow wi-adrail"><div class="GridItem-buujkM stRKV grid--em grid-layout__ntent"><div class="BodyWrapper-kufPGa lnwCqV body body__ntaer article__body" data-journey-hook="client-ntent" data-ttid="BodyWrapper"><div class="body__ner-ntaer"><p class="paywall">Milt Green, a 46-year-old U.W. extensn-service teacher who works wh Native Amerin stunts, says that he “would hope people take the time to fd out who Wyomg people really are.” He thks Matthew’s murr was “a els, stupid crime agast another human beg—I n’t support .”</p><p class="paywall">Neverthels, he adds, “bee of my value system, my background—my fay valu—I have a hard time relatg to [homosexualy]. I don’t unrstand .” He se tolerance as “a rpect issue: I have to rpect [gays] for tellg me, and they have to rpect me that I don’t unrstand where they’re g om.”</p><p class="paywall">Karla Brown, the 26-year-old manager of the Firi Bar & Lounge, says that she don’t know why “thkg about homosexualy evok such a viscerally negative rponse people … ’s almost like watchg someone eat rotten food. People are revolted by the ia.” Her own view is that “ an ial world we’d all be able to love each other, right?” But she don’t thk that’s realistic. Jt as the 1955 murr of Emmett Till (a 14-year-old black who was stripped and shot for sayg “hi” to a whe girl a ndy store) upset even racist Mississippians, the disputable barbary of the Shepard attack is makg people thk. “I’ve heard people talkg about who’ve never talked about homosexualy before,” Karla says, and surprisgly, she adds, she hasn’t “heard too many ignorant ments, which I thk shows that people are basilly cent.”</p><p class="paywall">Karla’s boyiend, Matt Mickelson, the 28-year-old owner of the Firi, plas, “Now we’re the pal of gay-bashg.” But he also says, “If you don’t feel sympathy for that kid, then you are one heartls son of a bch. This will make people more tolerant for sure. Normally you might flip someone some sh—make some off-lor ment. Now you’re gog to be more rerved about .”</p><p class="paywall">Mickelson remembers havg seen Matthew e to the bar a few tim, and n’t image he would have done anythg to provoke his ath. “As nice and pole and quiet as he was, I don’t see this kid makg random advanc,” he says. “The gay muny is rerved and rpectable here.” Mickelson adds that, like so many others, he don’t re for “some guy flamg around and half g on to you—I don’t even like when girls do that.” But Matthew “wasn’t a big parar,” and bothers Mickelson that “the media has ma him to this gay-rights msiah.”</p><p class="paywall">The bar owner nfs sheepishly that, to his surprise, he once “end up havg a gay iend. I didn’t know at the time we beme iends, but then, what are you gog to say—‘You’re not my iend anymore’?” In Mickelson’s Catholic fay he was told that “homosexualy is a meral ficiency—one step om retardatn.” He asks if I thk this is te.</p><p class="has-dropp paywall">Most of the church Laramie participated the vigils and memorial servic for Matthew; even tradnally anti-homosexualy sects, like Mormons, clud prayers for Matthew’s fay their servic. There was universal disgt at the Reverend Fred Phelps and his followers, who me om Topeka, Kansas, to prott durg Matthew’s funeral.</p><p class="paywall">Many Laramie churchgoers feel the media has taken their Christian valu—good, ordary valu—and twisted them to somethg obscene, lkg them to vlence. Jse Fisher is a 22-year-old Seventh-Day Adventist who works as a night lobby maid at the Holiday Inn. “Christiany,” she says, “is about tolerance and fivens. It hurts that [the protters] are llg themselv Christians. Church is the place that is supposed to take sners —church is the place you n go. Everyone has ss. I have ss, like I had a son out of marriage.” She thks that after his ath Matthew may have thgs to reckon for, but “maybe Matthew already ma his peace wh God—how n we know?”</p><div data-attr-viewport-monor="le-recirc" class="le-recirc-wrapper le-recirc-observer-target-4 viewport-monor-anchor"></div><p class="paywall">For members of the gay muny Laramie, however, the killg has a different meang. Gayle Woodsum says that gay people the Wt get the msage: “You n be who you want to, but don’t tell what is.” For her, “Matthew’s ath is a wake-up ll that if you tell—if you slip up—we might not let you live.”</p></div></div></div><div class="GridItem-buujkM fVLMby grid--em grid-layout__asi"><div class="StickyBoxWrapper-jfYB jxBcTH sticky-box"><div class="StickyBoxPrimary-dzWDWL cdhYoN sticky-box__primary"><div class="AdWrapper-dQtivb fZrssQ ad ad--rail"><div class="ad__slot ad__slot--rail" data-no-id="411hnd"></div></div><div class="ConsumerMarketgUnThemedWrapper-iUTMTf jssHut nsumer-marketg-un nsumer-marketg-un--display-rail" role="prentatn" aria-hidn="te"><div class="nsumer-marketg-un__slot nsumer-marketg-un__slot--display-rail"></div><div class="journey-un"></div></div><div data-attr-viewport-monor="" class="RecircMostPopularWrapper-bRuGTi jkTTgR recirc-most-popular-wrapper viewport-monor-anchor"><div class="RecircMostPopularConter-jiViNn ktrplG recirc-most-popular-sparrow-trackg 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summary-em__ntent--no-bric"><a class="SummaryItemHedLk-civM fPFrPI summary-em-trackg__hed-lk summary-em__hed-lk" data-ponent-type="recirc-river" data-recirc-id="em-hed-3" data-recirc-pattern="summary-em" href=" target="_self"><div data-ttid="ClampWrapper" class="ClampWrapper-kZxfkB hTTNGO clamp SummaryItemHedBase-hiFYpQ hRVxvR summary-em__hed"><div class="ClampContent-hilPkr jVhSBH"><div class="SummaryItemHedTag-TWblf gxaOcP" data-ttid="SummaryItemHed"><em>Red, Whe & Royal Blue</em> May Be “the Most Expensive B of Fan Fictn Ever”</div></div></div></a><div class="SummaryItemByleWrapper-boCfbi cuRXdL summary-em__byle-date-in"><div class="SummaryItemBaseByle-fFbXkY gRtaxp summary-em__byle"><div class="summary-em__byle__ntent"><div data-ttid="BylWrapper" class="BylWrapper-KIudk irTIfE byl"><p class="ByleWrapper-jWHrLH iNSiTG byle byl__byle" data-ttid="ByleWrapper" emProp="thor" emType="><span emProp="name" class="ByleNamWrapper-jbHncj fuDQVo"><span data-ttid="ByleName" class="ByleName-kwmrLn cYaBaU byle__name"><span class="BaseWrap-sc-gjQpdd BaseText-ewhhUZ BylePreamble-iJolpQ iUEiRd bIbWCO gnILss byle__preamble">By </span>Savannah Walsh</span></span></p></div></div></div></div></div></div></li><li><div class="AdWrapper-dQtivb fZrssQ RecircMostPopularSummaryItem-jQxxiw fHLKqj ad ad--asi"><div class="ad__slot ad__slot--asi" data-no-id="epvo"></div></div></li></ul><div class="RecircMostPopularFooter-enPjgs eAuebe"></div></div></div></div><div class="StickyBoxPlaceholr-grPmrg dxAvXx"></div></div></div></div><div class="RowWrapper-UmqTg HEhan full-bleed-ad row-mid-ntent-ad"><div class="StickyMidContentAdWrapper-fSBzwl drzyIa ad-stickymidntent"><div class="AdWrapper-dQtivb fZrssQ ad ad--mid-ntent should-hold-space"><div class="ad__slot ad__slot--mid-ntent" data-no-id="8i668k"></div></div></div></div><div class="GridWrapper-cAzTTK kHBDeH grid grid-margs grid-ems-2 ArticlePageChunksGrid-hfxa bjczjj grid-layout--adrail narrow wi-adrail"><div class="GridItem-buujkM stRKV grid--em grid-layout__ntent"><div class="BodyWrapper-kufPGa lnwCqV body body__ntaer article__body" data-journey-hook="client-ntent" data-ttid="BodyWrapper"><div class="body__ner-ntaer"><p class="paywall">At precisely this time, when she and other gay people feel the most unsafe, they are faced wh an obligatn to speak out about Matthew’s ath—some publicly g forward as gay for the first time. “When I heard, I jt wanted to go back to the closet,” Meha Fenimore, a iend of Matthew’s and a fellow member of U.W.’s Lbian, Gay, Bisexual and Trans-genred Associatn (L.G.B.T.A.), says.</p><p class="paywall">Gayle Woodsum was stck by what she regard as a revealg typo that appeared a ont-page article the <em>Boomerang</em> about Matthew’s ath: “A homoci is a homoci.” At Matthew’s memorial service at the Unarian church, Gayle stood up and told people that they had to “keep an eye on the law-enforcement people. This is a very homophobic system.”</p><p class="paywall">“Speakg about the murr brought up this tense fear,” she tells me, “but ’s fear of what they’ve already done to me.” When Gayle head the Albany County Crime Victim Wns Program for two years, she heard gay-bashg jok and, she alleg, read memos stctg law-enforcement officials on how to file domtic-abe charg so that allegedly abive men uld keep their guns.</p><p class="paywall">When someone outed Gayle to the district attorney’s office, she was shunned, she says, and then fired whout explanatn—by the same men who have now been entsted wh prosecutg Matthew’s alleged murrers. (In the <em>Boomerang</em>, the D.A. nied that Woodsum was fired bee of her sexual orientatn.)</p><p class="paywall">The roner, Julie Heggie, says, “I fely know that people Laramie are very homophobic—I know that. I’ve lived Laramie most of my life. It’s very sry. It was horrible to see his body—and I al wh ath on a daily basis. This is gog to affect even the roner’s office.” She adds, as if tryg to talk herself to , “But if chang 10 people’s attus, ’s a good thg.”</p><p class="has-dropp paywall">Although the sectn where Matthew was bound has been taken as evince by the police, the fence has bee a place of pilgrimage. Barren and betiful beneath the snow-dted Rocki, the se njur thoughts of Golgotha. Small yellow ston have been arranged to form a cross; every crevice of the fence are bouquets, not, stray tokens. Tiffany Edwards brought a tigereye stone; the day she and I vis she is disturbed to fd gone, along wh other offergs she rells, such as a pair of bber medil glov that were said to have touched Matthew’s body.</p><p class="paywall">“I brought the tigereye,” says Tiffany, “to brg sight and clary, to see the whole picture, to unrstand Matthew—his pa and terror and what his life was—to envisn him there and be O.K. about .”</p><p class="has-dropp paywall">Matthew “me to this world prematurely and he left prematurely,” a prs release om his parents, Dennis and Judy Shepard, reads. An earlier statement said that his “life has often been a stggle one way or another,” cludg many childhood ailments. “We know that he thks if he n make one person’s life better this world, then he has succeed. That is a measure of succs Matthew has always pursued.”</p><p class="paywall">The mythologizg of Matthew—his overnight transformatn to a natnal and ternatnal symbol—has left him oddly facels. No one has seemed terted publishg the tails of his life—as if they would tract om his martyrdom. But py is not unrstandg, and Matthew’s sorrow did not beg at the fence.</p><div data-attr-viewport-monor="le-recirc" class="le-recirc-wrapper le-recirc-observer-target-5 viewport-monor-anchor"></div><p class="paywall">“He had emotnal srs—he had faced this kd of attack throughout his life,” his iend Romae Patterson says. “He was a perpetual victim. That’s how he beme the person that he was.” The prs was reful to portray Matthew as a special person who “happened” to be gay. In fact the two quali were eply ternnected. “In some way he was special <em>bee</em> he was gay,” Judy Shepard tells me, “bee he had always been different and that difference ma him bee more thoughtful, sensive, and empathetic.” But “Matthew wasn’t openly gay,” his mother says. “He was hontly gay. He didn’t go around wh a sign on—for one thg, he was aaid.”</p><p class="paywall">As well as sufferg through a seri of mor cints throughout his life, durg his senr year high school Matthew had been the target of a vic attack Moroc. “He had the posture of a victim,” Judy says. “He was the kd of person whom you jt look at and know if you hurt him that he’s gog to take —that there’s nothg he n do about , verbally or physilly. When he walked down the street he had that victim walk,” she says. “But if he was an arena he knew about, like polics, he uld she wh self-nfince.”</p><p class="paywall">As a child growg up the small town of Casper, Wyomg, Matthew had always preferred the pany of adults. He was iendly wh all his classmat, “but he never had a bt iend,” his mother rells, and she believ he need that. “I thk he always felt out of place.” He was teased for beg small and unathletic. He was fascated by polics: Gloria Ngen, the fay hairdrser, rells how, when Matthew was the send gra, “he me to our shop and told all how to vote [ the lol electn]—and he knew. He knew the issu. We all thought he was gog to grow up to be print.”</p><p class="paywall">After Matthew’s sophomore year high school, the fay moved to Dhahran, Sdi Arabia, where his father was employed as an oil safety engeer. Bee there was no Amerin high school there, Matthew was sent to the Amerin School Swzerland—a progrsive school where he studied German and Italian and was volved theater. “He was a snappy drser,” his mother rells. “He liked untry, techno mic, and neo-swg bands like the Squirrel Nut Zippers. He was a good dancer and often went to clubs.”</p><p class="paywall">After graduatn, he attempted to figure out where to go. “He had a real rtls, searchg qualy,” Judy says. He briefly attend Catawba College Salisbury, North Carola, and then Casper College, where a teacher troduced him to Romae Patterson, an outgog lbian at the center of a social circle. “He was lookg for a gay muny and we took him ,” Romae says. When she moved to Denver a few months later, he followed. He worked for a ltle while a telemarketg job, sellg vams, and then qu. Romae was a wars at a ffee shop, where he went and hung out for a uple of hours most days.</p></div></div></div><div class="GridItem-buujkM fVLMby grid--em grid-layout__asi"><div class="StickyBoxWrapper-jfYB jxBcTH sticky-box"><div class="StickyBoxPrimary-dzWDWL cdhYoN sticky-box__primary"><div class="AdWrapper-dQtivb fZrssQ ad ad--rail"><div class="ad__slot ad__slot--rail" data-no-id="qam2yb"></div></div><div class="ConsumerMarketgUnThemedWrapper-iUTMTf jssHut nsumer-marketg-un nsumer-marketg-un--display-rail" role="prentatn" aria-hidn="te"><div class="nsumer-marketg-un__slot nsumer-marketg-un__slot--display-rail"></div><div class="journey-un"></div></div><div data-attr-viewport-monor="" class="RecircMostPopularWrapper-bRuGTi jkTTgR recirc-most-popular-wrapper viewport-monor-anchor"><div class="RecircMostPopularConter-jiViNn ktrplG recirc-most-popular-sparrow-trackg hi-asi-ad" data-most-popular-id="mod-most-popular-1111"><div class="RecircMostPopularHeadg-iVzhzt hBHzvB">Most 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class="aspect-rat--overlay-ntaer"><picture class="RponsiveImagePicture-cWuUZO dUOtEa SummaryItemRponsiveAsset-hjGIGg egpoQR summary-em__image rponsive-image"><noscript><source media="(max-width: 767px)" srcSet="" siz="100vw"/><source media="(m-width: 768px)" srcSet="" siz="100vw"/><img alt="Vany Fair’s “It’s Rag Teens” Cover at 20: Where Are They Now?" class="RponsiveImageContaer-eybHBd fptoWY rponsive-image__image" src="></noscript></picture></div></div></span></a></div><div class="SummaryItemContent-eiDYMl XMZX summary-em__ntent summary-em__ntent--no-bric"><a class="SummaryItemHedLk-civM fPFrPI summary-em-trackg__hed-lk summary-em__hed-lk" data-ponent-type="recirc-river" data-recirc-id="em-hed-1" data-recirc-pattern="summary-em" href=" target="_self"><div data-ttid="ClampWrapper" class="ClampWrapper-kZxfkB hTTNGO clamp SummaryItemHedBase-hiFYpQ hRVxvR summary-em__hed"><div class="ClampContent-hilPkr jVhSBH"><div class="SummaryItemHedTag-TWblf gxaOcP" data-ttid="SummaryItemHed"><em>Vany Fair</em>’s “It’s Rag Teens” Cover at 20: Where Are They Now?</div></div></div></a><div class="SummaryItemByleWrapper-boCfbi cuRXdL summary-em__byle-date-in"><div class="SummaryItemBaseByle-fFbXkY gRtaxp summary-em__byle"><div class="summary-em__byle__ntent"><div data-ttid="BylWrapper" class="BylWrapper-KIudk irTIfE byl"><p class="ByleWrapper-jWHrLH iNSiTG byle byl__byle" data-ttid="ByleWrapper" emProp="thor" emType="><span emProp="name" class="ByleNamWrapper-jbHncj fuDQVo"><span data-ttid="ByleName" class="ByleName-kwmrLn cYaBaU byle__name"><span class="BaseWrap-sc-gjQpdd BaseText-ewhhUZ BylePreamble-iJolpQ iUEiRd bIbWCO gnILss byle__preamble">By </span>Savannah Walsh</span></span></p></div></div></div></div></div></div></li><li><div class="SummaryItemWrapper-iwvBff doDafW summary-em summary-em--has-borr summary-em--ARTICLE summary-em--no-in summary-em--text-align-left summary-em--layout-placement-si-by-si summary-em--layout-posn-image-left summary-em--layout-proportns-33-66 summary-em--si-by-si-align-center summary-em--si-by-si-image-right-mobile-false summary-em--standard RecircMostPopularSummaryItem-jQxxiw jkeAv" role="button" tabx="0"><div class="SummaryItemAssetContaer-gwhFFH VOyg summary-em__asset-ntaer"><a class="SummaryItemImageLk-dshqxb cPpCwE summary-em__image-lk summary-em-trackg__image-lk" href=" aria-hidn="te" tabx="-1" data-ponent-type="recirc-river" data-recirc-id="em-image-2" data-recirc-pattern="summary-em" target="_self"><span class="SpanWrapper-umhxW kGxnNB rponsive-asset SummaryItemRponsiveAsset-hjGIGg egpoQR summary-em__image"><div data-tt="aspect-rat-ntaer" class="AspectRatContaer-bJHpJz cCcPgL"><div class="aspect-rat--overlay-ntaer"><picture class="RponsiveImagePicture-cWuUZO dUOtEa SummaryItemRponsiveAsset-hjGIGg egpoQR summary-em__image rponsive-image"><noscript><source media="(max-width: 767px)" srcSet="" siz="100vw"/><source media="(m-width: 768px)" srcSet="" siz="100vw"/><img alt="Rememberg Séad O’Connor’s Sublime Mic and Righteo Rage" class="RponsiveImageContaer-eybHBd fptoWY rponsive-image__image" src="></noscript></picture></div></div></span></a></div><div class="SummaryItemContent-eiDYMl XMZX summary-em__ntent summary-em__ntent--no-bric"><a class="SummaryItemHedLk-civM fPFrPI summary-em-trackg__hed-lk summary-em__hed-lk" data-ponent-type="recirc-river" data-recirc-id="em-hed-2" data-recirc-pattern="summary-em" href=" target="_self"><div data-ttid="ClampWrapper" class="ClampWrapper-kZxfkB hTTNGO clamp SummaryItemHedBase-hiFYpQ hRVxvR summary-em__hed"><div class="ClampContent-hilPkr jVhSBH"><div class="SummaryItemHedTag-TWblf gxaOcP" data-ttid="SummaryItemHed">Rememberg Séad O’Connor’s Sublime Mic and Righteo Rage</div></div></div></a><div class="SummaryItemByleWrapper-boCfbi cuRXdL summary-em__byle-date-in"><div class="SummaryItemBaseByle-fFbXkY gRtaxp summary-em__byle"><div class="summary-em__byle__ntent"><div data-ttid="BylWrapper" class="BylWrapper-KIudk irTIfE byl"><p class="ByleWrapper-jWHrLH iNSiTG byle byl__byle" data-ttid="ByleWrapper" emProp="thor" emType="><span emProp="name" class="ByleNamWrapper-jbHncj fuDQVo"><span data-ttid="ByleName" class="ByleName-kwmrLn cYaBaU byle__name"><span class="BaseWrap-sc-gjQpdd BaseText-ewhhUZ BylePreamble-iJolpQ iUEiRd bIbWCO gnILss byle__preamble">By </span>Mike Hogan</span></span></p></div></div></div></div></div></div></li><li><div class="SummaryItemWrapper-iwvBff doDafW summary-em summary-em--has-borr summary-em--ARTICLE summary-em--no-in summary-em--text-align-left summary-em--layout-placement-si-by-si summary-em--layout-posn-image-left summary-em--layout-proportns-33-66 summary-em--si-by-si-align-center summary-em--si-by-si-image-right-mobile-false summary-em--standard RecircMostPopularSummaryItem-jQxxiw jkeAv" role="button" tabx="0"><div class="SummaryItemAssetContaer-gwhFFH VOyg summary-em__asset-ntaer"><a class="SummaryItemImageLk-dshqxb cPpCwE summary-em__image-lk summary-em-trackg__image-lk" href=" aria-hidn="te" tabx="-1" data-ponent-type="recirc-river" data-recirc-id="em-image-3" data-recirc-pattern="summary-em" target="_self"><span class="SpanWrapper-umhxW kGxnNB rponsive-asset SummaryItemRponsiveAsset-hjGIGg egpoQR summary-em__image"><div data-tt="aspect-rat-ntaer" class="AspectRatContaer-bJHpJz cCcPgL"><div class="aspect-rat--overlay-ntaer"><picture class="RponsiveImagePicture-cWuUZO dUOtEa SummaryItemRponsiveAsset-hjGIGg egpoQR summary-em__image rponsive-image"><noscript><source media="(max-width: 767px)" srcSet="" siz="100vw"/><source media="(m-width: 768px)" srcSet="" siz="100vw"/><img alt="Red, Whe & Royal Blue May Be “the Most Expensive B of Fan Fictn Ever”" class="RponsiveImageContaer-eybHBd fptoWY rponsive-image__image" src="></noscript></picture></div></div></span></a></div><div class="SummaryItemContent-eiDYMl XMZX summary-em__ntent summary-em__ntent--no-bric"><a class="SummaryItemHedLk-civM fPFrPI summary-em-trackg__hed-lk summary-em__hed-lk" data-ponent-type="recirc-river" data-recirc-id="em-hed-3" data-recirc-pattern="summary-em" href=" target="_self"><div data-ttid="ClampWrapper" class="ClampWrapper-kZxfkB hTTNGO clamp SummaryItemHedBase-hiFYpQ hRVxvR summary-em__hed"><div class="ClampContent-hilPkr jVhSBH"><div class="SummaryItemHedTag-TWblf gxaOcP" data-ttid="SummaryItemHed"><em>Red, Whe & Royal Blue</em> May Be “the Most Expensive B of Fan Fictn Ever”</div></div></div></a><div class="SummaryItemByleWrapper-boCfbi cuRXdL summary-em__byle-date-in"><div class="SummaryItemBaseByle-fFbXkY gRtaxp summary-em__byle"><div class="summary-em__byle__ntent"><div data-ttid="BylWrapper" class="BylWrapper-KIudk irTIfE byl"><p class="ByleWrapper-jWHrLH iNSiTG byle byl__byle" data-ttid="ByleWrapper" emProp="thor" emType="><span emProp="name" class="ByleNamWrapper-jbHncj fuDQVo"><span data-ttid="ByleName" class="ByleName-kwmrLn cYaBaU byle__name"><span class="BaseWrap-sc-gjQpdd BaseText-ewhhUZ BylePreamble-iJolpQ iUEiRd bIbWCO gnILss byle__preamble">By </span>Savannah Walsh</span></span></p></div></div></div></div></div></div></li><li><div class="AdWrapper-dQtivb fZrssQ RecircMostPopularSummaryItem-jQxxiw fHLKqj ad ad--asi"><div class="ad__slot ad__slot--asi" data-no-id="pahntq"></div></div></li></ul><div class="RecircMostPopularFooter-enPjgs eAuebe"></div></div></div></div><div class="StickyBoxPlaceholr-grPmrg dxAvXx"></div></div></div></div><div class="RowWrapper-UmqTg HEhan full-bleed-ad row-mid-ntent-ad"><div class="StickyMidContentAdWrapper-fSBzwl drzyIa ad-stickymidntent"><div class="AdWrapper-dQtivb fZrssQ ad ad--mid-ntent should-hold-space"><div class="ad__slot ad__slot--mid-ntent" data-no-id="pvemm"></div></div></div></div><div class="GridWrapper-cAzTTK kHBDeH grid grid-margs grid-ems-2 ArticlePageChunksGrid-hfxa bjczjj grid-layout--adrail narrow wi-adrail"><div class="GridItem-buujkM stRKV grid--em grid-layout__ntent"><div class="BodyWrapper-kufPGa lnwCqV body body__ntaer article__body" data-journey-hook="client-ntent" data-ttid="BodyWrapper"><div class="body__ner-ntaer"><p class="paywall">“He’d s down and have the great nversatns wh strangers,” Romae rells. “His foc was to help people who are ls fortunate. He ma iends wh a homels man, and he’d take him to lunch once a week.”</p><p class="has-dropp paywall">Matthew suffered om perdic clil prsn and looked to livg Karis Communy, a Denver assisted-livg home n by mental-health profsnals, but he cid stead that he would move to Laramie and attend U.W., his parents’ alma mater. He felt that livg a small town would supply some of the same sense of muny, and that, as his mother says, “he’d feel safer there.”</p><p class="paywall">Although he didn’t e out until after graduatg om high school, Matthew knew he was gay om an early age. He told his iend Ta Labrie how, durg puberty, he had looked at some girlie magaz wh a group of iends. “He said he was cur to see women’s bodi, too, but he uld tell that his iends were feelg somethg different—they were attracted and exced some way he wasn’t. And then he noticed that when he looked at pictur of guys he had that same feelg.”</p><p class="paywall">He stggled wh how to e out to his parents. Romae, who grew up the ty muny of Tongue River, Wyomg, says that “when you e om Wyomg, parents haven’t had that tn.” They need to be “faiarized wh someone who is gay.”</p><div data-attr-viewport-monor="le-recirc" class="le-recirc-wrapper le-recirc-observer-target-6 viewport-monor-anchor"></div><p class="paywall">Matthew’s iend Brian Goon says, “His mom tried to be supportive, but she still had some misunrstandgs, some hop was jt a phase he was gog through. He sperately wanted acceptance and unrstandg om his parents. I thk he believed ep down that his parents would e round, but was takg more time than he wanted to.” Brian rells how Matthew “tried to drop hts to his parents that he was gay for a long time before he told them. Once when he was home he left a gay magaze out on the ffee table, but they put on his bed whout sayg anythg.”</p><p class="paywall">“That’s absurd—I knew he was gay all along,” Judy tells me. She don’t remember the cint, she says, but if she didn’t say anythg was bee she wasn’t surprised. When Matthew fally lled her om North Carola 1995 to tell her he was gay, she reassured him she had known for years. She knew om the way he rpond when girls got csh on him, as they often did, bee he was iendly and kd and treated them better than other boys did. She knew through what Matthew termed “gaydar”—the myster way which sexualy is sometim succsfully munited and unrstood—and she knew bee Matthew, like most people, wanted and need to reveal his te self.</p><p class="paywall">Judy Shepard never believed that Matthew had a choice about his sexual orientatn. “He said he didn’t choose to be gay—nobody would choose to be gay. It’s a very hard life: you’re lonely, you’re sred, you’re discrimated agast. He was searchg for a way to be happy wh . He was worried we’d be embarrassed or ashamed. I told him to qu puttg words my mouth. He would feel guilty, an extra burn, but he knew we would be there for him no matter what. There was never any qutn of that.”</p><p class="paywall">It was more difficult for Matthew to tell his father, whom he had always looked up to. “He and Dennis danced around for a year,” his mother rells. “It was a guy thg. Dennis would say to me, ‘Why don’t he tell me?’ Maybe retrospect this wasn’t the right cisn, but Dennis didn’t want to ask him before Matt was ready to tell him. Matt ma so much worse by buildg up his md and g himself all that anxiety. This was one of his real flaws. He would vent a scenar and would be the worst possible scenar. The thg that hurt Dennis the most about was Matt’s reluctance to nfi him.</p><p class="paywall">“As a parent of a gay child you feel a profound sense of loss that they’re not gog to ntue tradnal fay life—the dghter--law, the big weddg,” Judy says. “But long before he told , we had already gone through that procs. We felt he was our son and we loved him, and you don’t give that up bee your life is not what you thought was gog to be.”</p><p class="has-dropp paywall">At U.W., Matthew cid to ncentrate polil science wh a mor languag. Ta Labrie, a married anthropology major whom he met at a summer piic, quickly beme his clost iend; he f to Ta’s fay—takg to her hband and beg the idol of her small children. She rpond to his warmth and vulnerabily: “Whenever he learned of someone sufferg, affected him personally,” she says. She rells a time when they went to a matee of <em>Savg Private Ryan:</em> “He was so sensive to see the vlence and bloodshed he broke down and cried—afterwards he had to go home and take a nap and take a shower. Then he me back for dner and said he felt a ltle better.”</p><p class="paywall">Ta was touched by the way Matthew would sometim solic her opn on his cloth, askg, “Do this make me look like too much of a fag?” She says, “Makg a posive first imprsn was very important to him.” She remembers how he once gave her a bottle of apple juice to open. When she easily twisted the top off, “he said, ‘Great, there go whatever ltle b of masculy I have.’ The look on his face was so cute, pouty but jokg at the same time.” He was close to his younger brother, Logan, she rells, om whom he got “hand-me-up” clothg. “It was very important to [Matthew] to be a good role mol to [Logan],” Ta says. Matthew was exced that Logan was gog to e to Laramie the next summer, and possibly attend U.W.</p><p class="paywall">She was pleased when he told her that her hband, Phil, “was the first straight guy he ever felt wasn’t aaid of him. He asked me, ‘Have you ever had a fake hug? Straight guys hug as if they’re aaid beg gay is ntag and they’d tch .’ He said he’d never h on a straight man, even if he was attracted—he jt wanted to be iends wh them.” Matthew told her that before the bar cint Cody he had been asslted and raped Moroc. He asked her, however, not to tell Phil, bee he was aaid Phil would disapprove of him.</p><p class="has-dropp paywall">Durg his senr year high school, Matthew and three classmat had gone to Moroc. Unable to sleep one night, Matthew had gotten up and walked to a nearby ffeehoe, where he chatted wh a group of German exchange stunts. On the way home, a gang of lols acsted him, raped him six tim, and took his sho.</p><p class="paywall">He worked wh the Morocn police to tch the perpetrators, to no avail. But as he often did, Matthew spired passn his troubl. “The police uld have been awful, but they weren’t,” Judy says. One of them gave him a gift of a picture of a Morocn on horseback, a gture which touched Matthew. After the rape, Matthew stayed wh his parents Sdi Arabia for a while and unrwent therapy, but he ntued to suffer anxiety, flashbacks, and nightmar, om which he was unable to ee himself.</p></div></div></div><div class="GridItem-buujkM fVLMby grid--em grid-layout__asi"><div class="StickyBoxWrapper-jfYB jxBcTH sticky-box"><div class="StickyBoxPrimary-dzWDWL cdhYoN sticky-box__primary"><div class="AdWrapper-dQtivb fZrssQ ad ad--rail"><div class="ad__slot ad__slot--rail" data-no-id="26zlbp"></div></div><div class="ConsumerMarketgUnThemedWrapper-iUTMTf jssHut nsumer-marketg-un nsumer-marketg-un--display-rail" role="prentatn" aria-hidn="te"><div class="nsumer-marketg-un__slot nsumer-marketg-un__slot--display-rail"></div><div class="journey-un"></div></div><div data-attr-viewport-monor="" class="RecircMostPopularWrapper-bRuGTi jkTTgR recirc-most-popular-wrapper viewport-monor-anchor"><div class="RecircMostPopularConter-jiViNn ktrplG recirc-most-popular-sparrow-trackg hi-asi-ad" 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class="ClampContent-hilPkr jVhSBH"><div class="SummaryItemHedTag-TWblf gxaOcP" data-ttid="SummaryItemHed"><em>Vany Fair</em>’s “It’s Rag Teens” Cover at 20: Where Are They Now?</div></div></div></a><div class="SummaryItemByleWrapper-boCfbi cuRXdL summary-em__byle-date-in"><div class="SummaryItemBaseByle-fFbXkY gRtaxp summary-em__byle"><div class="summary-em__byle__ntent"><div data-ttid="BylWrapper" class="BylWrapper-KIudk irTIfE byl"><p class="ByleWrapper-jWHrLH iNSiTG byle byl__byle" data-ttid="ByleWrapper" emProp="thor" emType="><span emProp="name" class="ByleNamWrapper-jbHncj fuDQVo"><span data-ttid="ByleName" class="ByleName-kwmrLn cYaBaU byle__name"><span class="BaseWrap-sc-gjQpdd BaseText-ewhhUZ BylePreamble-iJolpQ iUEiRd bIbWCO gnILss byle__preamble">By </span>Savannah Walsh</span></span></p></div></div></div></div></div></div></li><li><div class="SummaryItemWrapper-iwvBff doDafW summary-em summary-em--has-borr summary-em--ARTICLE summary-em--no-in summary-em--text-align-left summary-em--layout-placement-si-by-si summary-em--layout-posn-image-left summary-em--layout-proportns-33-66 summary-em--si-by-si-align-center summary-em--si-by-si-image-right-mobile-false summary-em--standard RecircMostPopularSummaryItem-jQxxiw jkeAv" role="button" tabx="0"><div class="SummaryItemAssetContaer-gwhFFH VOyg summary-em__asset-ntaer"><a class="SummaryItemImageLk-dshqxb cPpCwE summary-em__image-lk summary-em-trackg__image-lk" href=" aria-hidn="te" tabx="-1" data-ponent-type="recirc-river" data-recirc-id="em-image-2" data-recirc-pattern="summary-em" target="_self"><span class="SpanWrapper-umhxW kGxnNB rponsive-asset SummaryItemRponsiveAsset-hjGIGg egpoQR summary-em__image"><div data-tt="aspect-rat-ntaer" class="AspectRatContaer-bJHpJz cCcPgL"><div class="aspect-rat--overlay-ntaer"><picture class="RponsiveImagePicture-cWuUZO dUOtEa SummaryItemRponsiveAsset-hjGIGg egpoQR summary-em__image rponsive-image"><noscript><source media="(max-width: 767px)" srcSet="" siz="100vw"/><source media="(m-width: 768px)" srcSet="" siz="100vw"/><img alt="Rememberg Séad O’Connor’s Sublime Mic and Righteo Rage" class="RponsiveImageContaer-eybHBd fptoWY rponsive-image__image" src="></noscript></picture></div></div></span></a></div><div class="SummaryItemContent-eiDYMl XMZX summary-em__ntent summary-em__ntent--no-bric"><a class="SummaryItemHedLk-civM fPFrPI summary-em-trackg__hed-lk summary-em__hed-lk" data-ponent-type="recirc-river" data-recirc-id="em-hed-2" data-recirc-pattern="summary-em" href=" target="_self"><div data-ttid="ClampWrapper" class="ClampWrapper-kZxfkB hTTNGO clamp SummaryItemHedBase-hiFYpQ hRVxvR summary-em__hed"><div class="ClampContent-hilPkr jVhSBH"><div class="SummaryItemHedTag-TWblf gxaOcP" data-ttid="SummaryItemHed">Rememberg Séad O’Connor’s Sublime Mic and Righteo Rage</div></div></div></a><div class="SummaryItemByleWrapper-boCfbi cuRXdL summary-em__byle-date-in"><div class="SummaryItemBaseByle-fFbXkY gRtaxp summary-em__byle"><div class="summary-em__byle__ntent"><div data-ttid="BylWrapper" class="BylWrapper-KIudk irTIfE byl"><p class="ByleWrapper-jWHrLH iNSiTG byle byl__byle" data-ttid="ByleWrapper" emProp="thor" emType="><span emProp="name" class="ByleNamWrapper-jbHncj fuDQVo"><span data-ttid="ByleName" class="ByleName-kwmrLn cYaBaU byle__name"><span class="BaseWrap-sc-gjQpdd BaseText-ewhhUZ BylePreamble-iJolpQ iUEiRd bIbWCO gnILss byle__preamble">By </span>Mike Hogan</span></span></p></div></div></div></div></div></div></li><li><div class="SummaryItemWrapper-iwvBff doDafW summary-em summary-em--has-borr summary-em--ARTICLE summary-em--no-in summary-em--text-align-left summary-em--layout-placement-si-by-si summary-em--layout-posn-image-left summary-em--layout-proportns-33-66 summary-em--si-by-si-align-center summary-em--si-by-si-image-right-mobile-false summary-em--standard RecircMostPopularSummaryItem-jQxxiw jkeAv" role="button" tabx="0"><div class="SummaryItemAssetContaer-gwhFFH VOyg summary-em__asset-ntaer"><a class="SummaryItemImageLk-dshqxb cPpCwE summary-em__image-lk summary-em-trackg__image-lk" href=" aria-hidn="te" tabx="-1" data-ponent-type="recirc-river" data-recirc-id="em-image-3" data-recirc-pattern="summary-em" target="_self"><span class="SpanWrapper-umhxW kGxnNB rponsive-asset SummaryItemRponsiveAsset-hjGIGg egpoQR summary-em__image"><div data-tt="aspect-rat-ntaer" class="AspectRatContaer-bJHpJz cCcPgL"><div class="aspect-rat--overlay-ntaer"><picture class="RponsiveImagePicture-cWuUZO dUOtEa SummaryItemRponsiveAsset-hjGIGg egpoQR summary-em__image rponsive-image"><noscript><source media="(max-width: 767px)" srcSet="" siz="100vw"/><source media="(m-width: 768px)" srcSet="" siz="100vw"/><img alt="Red, Whe & Royal Blue May Be “the Most Expensive B of Fan Fictn Ever”" class="RponsiveImageContaer-eybHBd fptoWY rponsive-image__image" src="></noscript></picture></div></div></span></a></div><div class="SummaryItemContent-eiDYMl XMZX summary-em__ntent summary-em__ntent--no-bric"><a class="SummaryItemHedLk-civM fPFrPI summary-em-trackg__hed-lk summary-em__hed-lk" data-ponent-type="recirc-river" data-recirc-id="em-hed-3" data-recirc-pattern="summary-em" href=" target="_self"><div data-ttid="ClampWrapper" class="ClampWrapper-kZxfkB hTTNGO clamp SummaryItemHedBase-hiFYpQ hRVxvR summary-em__hed"><div class="ClampContent-hilPkr jVhSBH"><div class="SummaryItemHedTag-TWblf gxaOcP" data-ttid="SummaryItemHed"><em>Red, Whe & Royal Blue</em> May Be “the Most Expensive B of Fan Fictn Ever”</div></div></div></a><div class="SummaryItemByleWrapper-boCfbi cuRXdL summary-em__byle-date-in"><div class="SummaryItemBaseByle-fFbXkY gRtaxp summary-em__byle"><div class="summary-em__byle__ntent"><div data-ttid="BylWrapper" class="BylWrapper-KIudk irTIfE byl"><p class="ByleWrapper-jWHrLH iNSiTG byle byl__byle" data-ttid="ByleWrapper" emProp="thor" emType="><span emProp="name" class="ByleNamWrapper-jbHncj fuDQVo"><span data-ttid="ByleName" class="ByleName-kwmrLn cYaBaU byle__name"><span class="BaseWrap-sc-gjQpdd BaseText-ewhhUZ BylePreamble-iJolpQ iUEiRd bIbWCO gnILss byle__preamble">By </span>Savannah Walsh</span></span></p></div></div></div></div></div></div></li><li><div class="AdWrapper-dQtivb fZrssQ RecircMostPopularSummaryItem-jQxxiw fHLKqj ad ad--asi"><div class="ad__slot ad__slot--asi" data-no-id="l4wl5"></div></div></li></ul><div class="RecircMostPopularFooter-enPjgs eAuebe"></div></div></div></div><div class="StickyBoxPlaceholr-grPmrg dxAvXx"></div></div></div></div><div class="RowWrapper-UmqTg HEhan full-bleed-ad row-mid-ntent-ad"><div class="StickyMidContentAdWrapper-fSBzwl drzyIa ad-stickymidntent"><div class="AdWrapper-dQtivb fZrssQ ad ad--mid-ntent should-hold-space"><div class="ad__slot ad__slot--mid-ntent" data-no-id="lpsxjb"></div></div></div></div><div class="GridWrapper-cAzTTK kHBDeH grid grid-margs grid-ems-2 ArticlePageChunksGrid-hfxa bjczjj grid-layout--adrail narrow wi-adrail"><div class="GridItem-buujkM stRKV grid--em grid-layout__ntent"><div class="BodyWrapper-kufPGa lnwCqV body body__ntaer article__body" data-journey-hook="client-ntent" data-ttid="BodyWrapper"><div class="body__ner-ntaer"><p class="paywall">“He was never the same after Moroc,” Judy says, “and neher were we. We were always worried about his physil safety and his mental state—that he would spair and hurt himself. It seemed to him was takg forever to feel safe.”</p><div data-attr-viewport-monor="le-recirc" class="le-recirc-wrapper le-recirc-observer-target-7 viewport-monor-anchor"></div><p class="paywall">Matthew told Ta he was hnted by the qutn of whether the perpetrators had ever been ught and what had happened to them. “He was imprsed wh the apartheid heargs South Ai—how Nelson Manla offered fivens as a step towards endg the vlence. He thought that was a ol revolutnary ia,” Ta says.</p><p class="paywall">After the rape, Judy says, Matthew suffered om perds of paranoia. “He would say, ‘My fear is irratnal, I shouldn’t be aaid of people.’ And then he would over-pensate for his fear by makg himself do somethg he shouldn’t”—a kd of unterphobia, which he’d recklsly put himself to the hands of strangers. Romae rells how he’d sometim take risks wh his safety, such as walkg alone at night Denver, explag that he didn’t want to be circumscribed by fear. On the fay vatn to Yellowstone last summer, he went to a bar Cody by himself late one night. He drank heavily, left wh some strangers, and eventually passed out, wh flashbacks of Moroc. He awoke, uncerta of what had happened, wh a spl lip and bised jaw. Later the bartenr told the police that Matthew had ma a pass at him and that he had therefore been pelled to h him.</p><p class="paywall">Matthew was “ut when to datg,” Romae says. He had only had one ser relatnship, while he was at school North Carola, wh a man who ma him unhappy. Judy worried that he uld be vulnerable to an emotnally abive relatnship. “Matt allowed [his first boyiend] to hurt him aga and aga.”</p><p class="paywall">It was through Ameri Onle last summer that Matthew met Brian Goon, a 36-year-old optician om Denver. Brian says that ually such munitns take a sexual turn immediately: “It’s ‘What’s your stats, when n I e over?’” He and Matthew trad qutns for an hour, and then Matthew told him he thought he was really gog to like him bee Brian hadn’t h on him. They rrpond and talked regularly for several months. “Matt was hant to meet,” Brian says. “I asked him why, and I uld hear his voice tremblg. He told me he was aaid somethg a lot more ser would happen.” Matthew was worried that he’d bee too attached, too pennt, as he had the tenncy to do some relatnships. “Fally, he ved me to Laramie for three days,” Brian says, “om October 9 to 12.”</p><p class="paywall">As September closed, Matthew was prsed. “Midterms were g up,” Ta says. “He was aaid of failure—he felt all this prsure not to fuck up.”</p><p class="paywall">“We were really hopeful at the begng of the semter,” his mother says. Matthew suffered om attentn fic disorr, and had always stggled as a stunt. “A ‘B’ for him was a real achievement,” Judy says. “He’d have a panic attack and would miss class and then get so far behd there was no way of tchg up. He had a hab of movg, stead of stayg one place and makg thgs work…. He was gog to try as hard as he uld Laramie, and if didn’t work, at the end of the semter we were gog to try somethg different—perhaps more tensive therapy. He was only a month to the semter when he died, but he was beg more sad and whdrawn.”</p></div></div></div><div class="GridItem-buujkM fVLMby grid--em grid-layout__asi"><div class="StickyBoxWrapper-jfYB jxBcTH sticky-box"><div class="StickyBoxPrimary-dzWDWL cdhYoN sticky-box__primary"><div class="AdWrapper-dQtivb fZrssQ ad ad--rail"><div class="ad__slot ad__slot--rail" data-no-id="wl2u6"></div></div><div class="ConsumerMarketgUnThemedWrapper-iUTMTf jssHut nsumer-marketg-un nsumer-marketg-un--display-rail" role="prentatn" aria-hidn="te"><div class="nsumer-marketg-un__slot nsumer-marketg-un__slot--display-rail"></div><div class="journey-un"></div></div><div data-attr-viewport-monor="" class="RecircMostPopularWrapper-bRuGTi jkTTgR recirc-most-popular-wrapper viewport-monor-anchor"><div class="RecircMostPopularConter-jiViNn ktrplG recirc-most-popular-sparrow-trackg hi-asi-ad" data-most-popular-id="mod-most-popular-1113"><div class="RecircMostPopularHeadg-iVzhzt hBHzvB">Most 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article__body" data-journey-hook="client-ntent" data-ttid="BodyWrapper"><div class="body__ner-ntaer"><p class="paywall">Although he had a psychiatrist who prcribed meditn for him, he was lookg for a therapist he uld really talk to. “He had seen somebody at the stunt health center, but she jt wanted to talk about his amic goals—she didn’t seem to really unrstand his prsn,” Ta rells. He had been hospalized several tim for prsn and suicidal iatn; the prev summer he had checked himself to a hospal Laramie. He was takg Effexor, an antiprsant, and Klonop, an anti-anxiety dg. Judy was ncerned that the meditns weren’t workg and that Matthew would drk, “and the batn of the dgs and the alhol would epen his sadns.”</p><p class="has-dropp paywall">On Friday, October 2, Matthew asked Ta to acpany him to the Tornado, a gay bar Fort Colls, Colorado, Doc’s limoe. Matthew owned a 1978 Bron, but he disliked drivg . “He said he felt lost ,” Ta says, “a ltle guy a such a big tck.” But he was also “worried that rentg the limoe he was beg selfish. I’d never ridn a limoe before. I said, ‘If you n’t pamper yourself, thk that you’re pamperg me.’”</p><p class="paywall">At the Tornado, Ta and Matthew sat the garn talkg for an hour about life goals and dreams and ath. He told her how guilty he felt about havg been born to a well-off fay, and she said that he uld e his rourc to help people. Matthew told her that if anythg ever happened to her and Phil, he’d like to be the guardian of their children. Then he asked her if she would take his t, Clayton, if somethg ever happened to him.</p><div data-attr-viewport-monor="le-recirc" class="le-recirc-wrapper le-recirc-observer-target-8 viewport-monor-anchor"></div><p class="paywall">“I knew how much he loved his t. I said, ‘O.K., om now on, when we move to an apartment we’ll make sure we get on that allow pets,’ thkg he’d outlive Clayton and we were talkg about some later t.”</p><p class="paywall">Insi the Tornado, several men approached Matthew. The first, someone warned, was H.I.V.-posive and didn’t always tell people, so Matthew shied away om him. Matthew had told Ta that he was worried about H.I.V. and always ed protectn. “Then this other guy me and stuck to him like glue,” Ta says. “Matt didn’t like him, but he uldn’t figure out how to get rid of him and still be pole.”</p><p class="paywall">Ridg home the early hours of Saturday morng, Matthew told Ta he felt that “if he died no one would even notice until his bills weren’t paid, and then his parents would ll up to bch and then realize he was ad. He felt nobody red what he was gog through. He told me about his ltle suici plan—he would take all his Klonop at once wh alhol. I asked how often he had been thkg of this, and he said que a b. It seemed like he was pretty close—closer than the way he scribed other prsns.” Then he leaned his head on Ta’s cht and fell asleep listeng to her heart beat. “I’m like, Wow, I have a iend who’s not aaid to touch me,” she rells. “Most iends seem to thk affectn go on only on special ocsns.”</p><p class="has-dropp paywall">When they got back to Laramie, Ta asked if she uld sleep on Matthew’s uch so as not to leave him alone. Saturday morng she awoke to hear Matthew an argument on the phone wh his mother, who was upset bee he had overdrawn his bank acunt—a pattern of his.</p><p class="paywall">“Afterwards he felt really bad bee he lost his ol and started csg at her, which he had never done before,” she says. “That afternoon I had to go home bee Phil had a ld. I asked Matthew if I should ll somebody for him, and he told me that he knew ep down, he’d be O.K.—that he uld get through this.” She asked him to promise he wouldn’t do anythg to hurt himself until she got back, and he promised.</p><p class="paywall">On Sunday, he lled his mother and apologized, tellg her, “You’re right, I’ve got to be more reful wh my money. I promise I’ll do better.” Then he said, “I love you, Mom—I’ll talk to you later.”</p><p class="paywall">Judy weeps now, rellg her last words to her son. “I love you, too. Be safe,” she said. “That was my mantra to Matt—be smart, be safe.”</p><p class="paywall">That afternoon, Ta tried llg Matthew. When she got no answer, she went to his apartment and then searched downtown, where she was relieved to fd him a rtrant.</p><p class="paywall">On Tuday, Ta had ught a ld and stayed home all day. She tried to reach Matthew that eveng, but she wasn’t feelg well enough to go look for him. Wednday morng she started llg him right away, and beme anx when she got no answer.</p><div data-attr-viewport-monor="le-recirc" class="le-recirc-wrapper le-recirc-observer-target-9 viewport-monor-anchor"></div><p class="paywall">After batg wh herself, at seven that eveng she cid to go ahead and ll the police. She told the officer that she had a iend she wanted them to check on. The officer asked for his name, and when she told him, a long silence ensued. Then the officer started askg a lot of qutns, like whether there were any people town who didn’t like Matthew. “I’m thkg the aren’t normal qutns, but I try and answer. And then they say they’re gog to send an officer over to talk to me. And then I’m really sred. I don’t want them to send an officer to me, I want them to send an officer to look for Matt. When the officer gets here she don’t tell me anythg, but she starts askg more qutns, nng all the nam by me, askg whether I knew Aaron McKney and Rsell Henrson. But I had never heard of them.”</p></div></div></div><div class="GridItem-buujkM fVLMby grid--em grid-layout__asi"><div class="StickyBoxWrapper-jfYB jxBcTH sticky-box"><div class="StickyBoxPrimary-dzWDWL cdhYoN sticky-box__primary"><div class="AdWrapper-dQtivb fZrssQ ad ad--rail"><div class="ad__slot ad__slot--rail" data-no-id="qfxz7f"></div></div><div class="ConsumerMarketgUnThemedWrapper-iUTMTf jssHut nsumer-marketg-un nsumer-marketg-un--display-rail" role="prentatn" aria-hidn="te"><div class="nsumer-marketg-un__slot nsumer-marketg-un__slot--display-rail"></div><div class="journey-un"></div></div><div data-attr-viewport-monor="" class="RecircMostPopularWrapper-bRuGTi jkTTgR recirc-most-popular-wrapper viewport-monor-anchor"><div class="RecircMostPopularConter-jiViNn ktrplG recirc-most-popular-sparrow-trackg hi-asi-ad" data-most-popular-id="mod-most-popular-1114"><div class="RecircMostPopularHeadg-iVzhzt hBHzvB">Most Popular</div><ul class="RecircMostPopularItems-dCAajf gqcRrp"><li><div class="SummaryItemWrapper-iwvBff doDafW summary-em summary-em--has-borr summary-em--GALLERY summary-em--no-in summary-em--text-align-left summary-em--layout-placement-si-by-si summary-em--layout-posn-image-left summary-em--layout-proportns-33-66 summary-em--si-by-si-align-center summary-em--si-by-si-image-right-mobile-false summary-em--standard RecircMostPopularSummaryItem-jQxxiw jkeAv" role="button" tabx="0"><div class="SummaryItemAssetContaer-gwhFFH VOyg summary-em__asset-ntaer"><a class="SummaryItemImageLk-dshqxb cPpCwE summary-em__image-lk summary-em-trackg__image-lk" href=" aria-hidn="te" tabx="-1" data-ponent-type="recirc-river" data-recirc-id="em-image-1" data-recirc-pattern="summary-em" target="_self"><span class="SpanWrapper-umhxW kGxnNB rponsive-asset SummaryItemRponsiveAsset-hjGIGg egpoQR summary-em__image"><div data-tt="aspect-rat-ntaer" class="AspectRatContaer-bJHpJz cCcPgL"><div class="aspect-rat--overlay-ntaer"><picture class="RponsiveImagePicture-cWuUZO dUOtEa SummaryItemRponsiveAsset-hjGIGg egpoQR summary-em__image rponsive-image"><noscript><source media="(max-width: 767px)" srcSet="" siz="100vw"/><source media="(m-width: 768px)" srcSet="" siz="100vw"/><img alt="Vany Fair’s “It’s Rag Teens” Cover at 20: Where Are They Now?" class="RponsiveImageContaer-eybHBd fptoWY rponsive-image__image" src="></noscript></picture></div></div></span></a></div><div class="SummaryItemContent-eiDYMl XMZX summary-em__ntent summary-em__ntent--no-bric"><a class="SummaryItemHedLk-civM fPFrPI summary-em-trackg__hed-lk summary-em__hed-lk" data-ponent-type="recirc-river" data-recirc-id="em-hed-1" data-recirc-pattern="summary-em" href=" target="_self"><div data-ttid="ClampWrapper" class="ClampWrapper-kZxfkB hTTNGO clamp SummaryItemHedBase-hiFYpQ hRVxvR summary-em__hed"><div class="ClampContent-hilPkr jVhSBH"><div class="SummaryItemHedTag-TWblf gxaOcP" data-ttid="SummaryItemHed"><em>Vany Fair</em>’s “It’s Rag Teens” Cover at 20: Where Are They Now?</div></div></div></a><div class="SummaryItemByleWrapper-boCfbi cuRXdL summary-em__byle-date-in"><div class="SummaryItemBaseByle-fFbXkY gRtaxp summary-em__byle"><div class="summary-em__byle__ntent"><div data-ttid="BylWrapper" class="BylWrapper-KIudk irTIfE byl"><p class="ByleWrapper-jWHrLH iNSiTG byle byl__byle" data-ttid="ByleWrapper" emProp="thor" emType="><span emProp="name" class="ByleNamWrapper-jbHncj fuDQVo"><span data-ttid="ByleName" class="ByleName-kwmrLn cYaBaU byle__name"><span class="BaseWrap-sc-gjQpdd BaseText-ewhhUZ BylePreamble-iJolpQ iUEiRd bIbWCO gnILss byle__preamble">By </span>Savannah Walsh</span></span></p></div></div></div></div></div></div></li><li><div class="SummaryItemWrapper-iwvBff doDafW summary-em summary-em--has-borr summary-em--ARTICLE summary-em--no-in summary-em--text-align-left summary-em--layout-placement-si-by-si summary-em--layout-posn-image-left summary-em--layout-proportns-33-66 summary-em--si-by-si-align-center summary-em--si-by-si-image-right-mobile-false summary-em--standard RecircMostPopularSummaryItem-jQxxiw jkeAv" role="button" tabx="0"><div class="SummaryItemAssetContaer-gwhFFH VOyg summary-em__asset-ntaer"><a class="SummaryItemImageLk-dshqxb cPpCwE summary-em__image-lk summary-em-trackg__image-lk" href=" aria-hidn="te" tabx="-1" data-ponent-type="recirc-river" data-recirc-id="em-image-2" data-recirc-pattern="summary-em" target="_self"><span class="SpanWrapper-umhxW kGxnNB rponsive-asset SummaryItemRponsiveAsset-hjGIGg egpoQR summary-em__image"><div data-tt="aspect-rat-ntaer" class="AspectRatContaer-bJHpJz cCcPgL"><div class="aspect-rat--overlay-ntaer"><picture class="RponsiveImagePicture-cWuUZO dUOtEa SummaryItemRponsiveAsset-hjGIGg egpoQR summary-em__image rponsive-image"><noscript><source media="(max-width: 767px)" srcSet="" siz="100vw"/><source media="(m-width: 768px)" srcSet="" siz="100vw"/><img alt="Rememberg Séad O’Connor’s Sublime Mic and Righteo Rage" class="RponsiveImageContaer-eybHBd fptoWY rponsive-image__image" src="></noscript></picture></div></div></span></a></div><div class="SummaryItemContent-eiDYMl XMZX summary-em__ntent summary-em__ntent--no-bric"><a class="SummaryItemHedLk-civM fPFrPI summary-em-trackg__hed-lk summary-em__hed-lk" data-ponent-type="recirc-river" data-recirc-id="em-hed-2" data-recirc-pattern="summary-em" href=" target="_self"><div data-ttid="ClampWrapper" class="ClampWrapper-kZxfkB hTTNGO clamp SummaryItemHedBase-hiFYpQ hRVxvR summary-em__hed"><div class="ClampContent-hilPkr jVhSBH"><div class="SummaryItemHedTag-TWblf gxaOcP" data-ttid="SummaryItemHed">Rememberg Séad O’Connor’s Sublime Mic and Righteo Rage</div></div></div></a><div class="SummaryItemByleWrapper-boCfbi cuRXdL summary-em__byle-date-in"><div class="SummaryItemBaseByle-fFbXkY gRtaxp summary-em__byle"><div class="summary-em__byle__ntent"><div data-ttid="BylWrapper" class="BylWrapper-KIudk irTIfE byl"><p class="ByleWrapper-jWHrLH iNSiTG byle byl__byle" data-ttid="ByleWrapper" emProp="thor" emType="><span emProp="name" class="ByleNamWrapper-jbHncj fuDQVo"><span data-ttid="ByleName" class="ByleName-kwmrLn cYaBaU byle__name"><span class="BaseWrap-sc-gjQpdd BaseText-ewhhUZ BylePreamble-iJolpQ iUEiRd bIbWCO gnILss byle__preamble">By </span>Mike Hogan</span></span></p></div></div></div></div></div></div></li><li><div class="SummaryItemWrapper-iwvBff doDafW summary-em summary-em--has-borr summary-em--ARTICLE summary-em--no-in summary-em--text-align-left summary-em--layout-placement-si-by-si summary-em--layout-posn-image-left summary-em--layout-proportns-33-66 summary-em--si-by-si-align-center summary-em--si-by-si-image-right-mobile-false summary-em--standard RecircMostPopularSummaryItem-jQxxiw jkeAv" role="button" tabx="0"><div class="SummaryItemAssetContaer-gwhFFH VOyg summary-em__asset-ntaer"><a class="SummaryItemImageLk-dshqxb cPpCwE summary-em__image-lk summary-em-trackg__image-lk" href=" aria-hidn="te" tabx="-1" data-ponent-type="recirc-river" data-recirc-id="em-image-3" data-recirc-pattern="summary-em" target="_self"><span class="SpanWrapper-umhxW kGxnNB rponsive-asset SummaryItemRponsiveAsset-hjGIGg egpoQR summary-em__image"><div data-tt="aspect-rat-ntaer" class="AspectRatContaer-bJHpJz cCcPgL"><div class="aspect-rat--overlay-ntaer"><picture class="RponsiveImagePicture-cWuUZO dUOtEa SummaryItemRponsiveAsset-hjGIGg egpoQR summary-em__image rponsive-image"><noscript><source media="(max-width: 767px)" srcSet="" siz="100vw"/><source media="(m-width: 768px)" srcSet="" siz="100vw"/><img alt="Red, Whe & Royal Blue May Be “the Most Expensive B of Fan Fictn Ever”" class="RponsiveImageContaer-eybHBd fptoWY rponsive-image__image" src="></noscript></picture></div></div></span></a></div><div class="SummaryItemContent-eiDYMl XMZX summary-em__ntent summary-em__ntent--no-bric"><a class="SummaryItemHedLk-civM fPFrPI summary-em-trackg__hed-lk summary-em__hed-lk" data-ponent-type="recirc-river" data-recirc-id="em-hed-3" data-recirc-pattern="summary-em" href=" target="_self"><div data-ttid="ClampWrapper" class="ClampWrapper-kZxfkB hTTNGO clamp SummaryItemHedBase-hiFYpQ hRVxvR summary-em__hed"><div class="ClampContent-hilPkr jVhSBH"><div class="SummaryItemHedTag-TWblf gxaOcP" data-ttid="SummaryItemHed"><em>Red, Whe & Royal Blue</em> May Be “the Most Expensive B of Fan Fictn Ever”</div></div></div></a><div class="SummaryItemByleWrapper-boCfbi cuRXdL summary-em__byle-date-in"><div class="SummaryItemBaseByle-fFbXkY gRtaxp summary-em__byle"><div class="summary-em__byle__ntent"><div data-ttid="BylWrapper" class="BylWrapper-KIudk irTIfE byl"><p class="ByleWrapper-jWHrLH iNSiTG byle byl__byle" data-ttid="ByleWrapper" emProp="thor" emType="><span emProp="name" class="ByleNamWrapper-jbHncj fuDQVo"><span data-ttid="ByleName" class="ByleName-kwmrLn cYaBaU byle__name"><span class="BaseWrap-sc-gjQpdd BaseText-ewhhUZ BylePreamble-iJolpQ iUEiRd bIbWCO gnILss byle__preamble">By </span>Savannah Walsh</span></span></p></div></div></div></div></div></div></li><li><div class="AdWrapper-dQtivb fZrssQ RecircMostPopularSummaryItem-jQxxiw fHLKqj ad ad--asi"><div class="ad__slot ad__slot--asi" data-no-id="8smvpn"></div></div></li></ul><div class="RecircMostPopularFooter-enPjgs eAuebe"></div></div></div></div><div class="StickyBoxPlaceholr-grPmrg dxAvXx"></div></div></div></div><div class="RowWrapper-UmqTg HEhan full-bleed-ad row-mid-ntent-ad"><div class="StickyMidContentAdWrapper-fSBzwl drzyIa ad-stickymidntent"><div class="AdWrapper-dQtivb fZrssQ ad ad--mid-ntent should-hold-space"><div class="ad__slot ad__slot--mid-ntent" data-no-id="19xc"></div></div></div></div><div class="GridWrapper-cAzTTK kHBDeH grid grid-margs grid-ems-2 ArticlePageChunksGrid-hfxa bjczjj grid-layout--adrail narrow wi-adrail"><div class="GridItem-buujkM stRKV grid--em grid-layout__ntent"><div class="BodyWrapper-kufPGa lnwCqV body body__ntaer article__body" data-journey-hook="client-ntent" data-ttid="BodyWrapper"><div class="body__ner-ntaer"><p class="paywall">When Matt Mickelson, the owner of the Firi, heard of the arrts of McKney and Henrson, his first reactn “was like: Where did those bastards e om? Where are they om? Then I found out they were om here.” He thks “Rsell’s a trailer-trash kid. His mom’s a dnk broad” who has “had some random dus.”</p><p class="paywall">On January 3, Rsell’s mother, Cdy Dixon—a 40-year-old alholic and battered wife who was last seen staggerg out of a bar—was disvered ozen to ath on a snowy, ral road eight north of town.</p><p class="paywall">Mickelson rells Rsell’s mother g to the bar a few weeks after the slayg wh Rsell’s stepfather, Charl Dixon. They bought a uple of dollar beers, and then Charl Dixon approached Mickelson to apologize for any trouble the attack may have ed to his bs. “He says Rs and Aaron were g off a four-day benr, dog crank [methamphetame]. I was like: What n I say? Sorry your kid tied someone to a fence and beat him to ath?” He throws up his hands. “It’s over my head, man.”</p><p class="paywall">The natnal prs typed Aaron and Rsell as rednecks—a characterizatn which angers many Laramie rints. Mickelson, whose fay me to the area 1862 and has clud generatns of wboys, says that “rednecks aren’t ignorant or narrowmd—you get a red neck om workg the sun. The kids aren’t rednecks; they’re lazy ltle crankheads—rather than gettg a job, they’re out tryg to rob someone. They’re not wboys—they’re wardly. To have to tie someone up to beat them … ” he adds, a tail for which he has particular ntempt.</p><p class="has-dropp paywall">There is a grim narrative siary among the stori of Aaron McKney, Rsell Henrson, Kristen Price, and Chasy Pasley—liv both chaotic and dull, the tails numbgly terchangeable. Aaron’s parents, Bill and Denise McKney, divorced when Aaron was young. Aaron spent much of his childhood alone; acrdg to the Associated Prs, his mother left him wh his grandparents or locked him the basement to keep him out of trouble. He often got to fights school and did poorly, flunkg seventh gra. At 14 he stole a sh register and was placed a youth-tentn center. When he was 16 his mother died unexpectedly followg surgery. He qu school and began workg.</p><p class="paywall">A uple of years ago, he met Kristen Price, who moved to the trailer Aaron shared wh a bunch of other guys. When Aaron hered some money after his mother’s ath, he reportedly went on a bge, buyg dgs, jewelry, and a Camaro wh a vany plate scribed DOPEY.</p><p class="paywall">Aaron soon ran through the money, and last December, along wh two acplic, broke to the lol KFC, stealg $2,500 and some sserts. After the robbery, Aaron and Kristen moved to Pensala, Florida, where Kristen’s mother, Kim Kelly, liv. Aaron got a job as an apprentice pipe fter, but the police ught up wh them and they returned to Laramie so that he uld face the robbery charge. Last summer their son, Cameron, was born.</p><p class="paywall">Doc rells that Kristen and Aaron were “always lovey-dovey when I saw them. I never saw Aaron h her or get her face.” He saw Kristen as “a happy-go-lucky gal.” They’d ocsnally hire his limoe and for $60 an hour ri around, drkg and watchg TV. Doc liked them: they “always tipped well, were well mannered—once a while McKney got shfaced, but he wasn’t that hard to handle.” McKney liked rap mic. “Weird stuff,” Doc says, “like: ‘Nancy, give me head, head, ad, ad’—I never heard that type of stuff before.” Sometim they’d pick up Rsell, whom Doc rells as “a d-mannered fellow.” He says that sometim “Aaron would ri around the limoe wh other girls.” Doc thought Kristen knew and didn’t re.</p><div data-attr-viewport-monor="le-recirc" class="le-recirc-wrapper le-recirc-observer-target-10 viewport-monor-anchor"></div><p class="paywall">Aaron’s iend Odi, a 22-year-old Ain-Amerin manual laborer who go by a sgle name (“Like Prce,” he says) saw Aaron as havg “a lot of anger—more than most kids. I uld image him beatg someone, but not like that.” Aaron ed dgs, but, Odi says, “so do 93 percent of kids this town.” People remember Aaron once “flippg out” at a Laramie bar upon seeg the doctor he believed rponsible for his mother’s ath. Bill McKney tried to expla Matthew’s ath as his son’s reactn to Matthew’s alleged sexual overture. Aaron, he said, don’t like to be embarrassed ont of other people.</p><p class="paywall">Odi first met Aaron a crisis center Laramie when they were teenagers. Aaron’s mother had to leave him there for perds of time when she found him too difficult to manage; Aaron hated beg trapped there, subject to strict regulatns. Odi has trouble formulatg what he liked about Aaron: “He played practil jok on me. Once he put honey my shampoo.” Qutned about Aaron’s life, he rponds, “We didn’t talk about his favore movie, favore thgs. It seems like you e om a nice place—a world where people have favore thgs. If you’re askg me if we ever got ep-ep, we never did.” When asked if Aaron had any close iends—people who really knew him—he wrkl his nose: “Who do?”</p></div></div></div><div class="GridItem-buujkM fVLMby grid--em grid-layout__asi"><div class="StickyBoxWrapper-jfYB jxBcTH sticky-box"><div class="StickyBoxPrimary-dzWDWL cdhYoN sticky-box__primary"><div class="AdWrapper-dQtivb fZrssQ ad ad--rail"><div class="ad__slot ad__slot--rail" data-no-id="3f8woh"></div></div><div class="ConsumerMarketgUnThemedWrapper-iUTMTf jssHut nsumer-marketg-un nsumer-marketg-un--display-rail" role="prentatn" aria-hidn="te"><div class="nsumer-marketg-un__slot nsumer-marketg-un__slot--display-rail"></div><div class="journey-un"></div></div><div data-attr-viewport-monor="" class="RecircMostPopularWrapper-bRuGTi jkTTgR recirc-most-popular-wrapper viewport-monor-anchor"><div class="RecircMostPopularConter-jiViNn ktrplG recirc-most-popular-sparrow-trackg hi-asi-ad" data-most-popular-id="mod-most-popular-1115"><div 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class="AspectRatContaer-bJHpJz cCcPgL"><div class="aspect-rat--overlay-ntaer"><picture class="RponsiveImagePicture-cWuUZO dUOtEa SummaryItemRponsiveAsset-hjGIGg egpoQR summary-em__image rponsive-image"><noscript><source media="(max-width: 767px)" srcSet="" siz="100vw"/><source media="(m-width: 768px)" srcSet="" siz="100vw"/><img alt="Vany Fair’s “It’s Rag Teens” Cover at 20: Where Are They Now?" class="RponsiveImageContaer-eybHBd fptoWY rponsive-image__image" src="></noscript></picture></div></div></span></a></div><div class="SummaryItemContent-eiDYMl XMZX summary-em__ntent summary-em__ntent--no-bric"><a class="SummaryItemHedLk-civM fPFrPI summary-em-trackg__hed-lk summary-em__hed-lk" data-ponent-type="recirc-river" data-recirc-id="em-hed-1" data-recirc-pattern="summary-em" href=" target="_self"><div data-ttid="ClampWrapper" class="ClampWrapper-kZxfkB hTTNGO clamp SummaryItemHedBase-hiFYpQ hRVxvR summary-em__hed"><div class="ClampContent-hilPkr jVhSBH"><div class="SummaryItemHedTag-TWblf gxaOcP" data-ttid="SummaryItemHed"><em>Vany Fair</em>’s “It’s Rag Teens” Cover at 20: Where Are They Now?</div></div></div></a><div class="SummaryItemByleWrapper-boCfbi cuRXdL summary-em__byle-date-in"><div class="SummaryItemBaseByle-fFbXkY gRtaxp summary-em__byle"><div class="summary-em__byle__ntent"><div data-ttid="BylWrapper" class="BylWrapper-KIudk irTIfE byl"><p class="ByleWrapper-jWHrLH iNSiTG byle byl__byle" data-ttid="ByleWrapper" emProp="thor" emType="><span emProp="name" class="ByleNamWrapper-jbHncj fuDQVo"><span data-ttid="ByleName" class="ByleName-kwmrLn cYaBaU byle__name"><span class="BaseWrap-sc-gjQpdd BaseText-ewhhUZ BylePreamble-iJolpQ iUEiRd bIbWCO gnILss byle__preamble">By </span>Savannah Walsh</span></span></p></div></div></div></div></div></div></li><li><div class="SummaryItemWrapper-iwvBff doDafW summary-em summary-em--has-borr summary-em--ARTICLE summary-em--no-in summary-em--text-align-left summary-em--layout-placement-si-by-si summary-em--layout-posn-image-left summary-em--layout-proportns-33-66 summary-em--si-by-si-align-center summary-em--si-by-si-image-right-mobile-false summary-em--standard RecircMostPopularSummaryItem-jQxxiw jkeAv" role="button" tabx="0"><div class="SummaryItemAssetContaer-gwhFFH VOyg summary-em__asset-ntaer"><a class="SummaryItemImageLk-dshqxb cPpCwE summary-em__image-lk summary-em-trackg__image-lk" href=" aria-hidn="te" tabx="-1" data-ponent-type="recirc-river" data-recirc-id="em-image-2" data-recirc-pattern="summary-em" target="_self"><span class="SpanWrapper-umhxW kGxnNB rponsive-asset SummaryItemRponsiveAsset-hjGIGg egpoQR summary-em__image"><div data-tt="aspect-rat-ntaer" class="AspectRatContaer-bJHpJz cCcPgL"><div class="aspect-rat--overlay-ntaer"><picture class="RponsiveImagePicture-cWuUZO dUOtEa SummaryItemRponsiveAsset-hjGIGg egpoQR summary-em__image rponsive-image"><noscript><source media="(max-width: 767px)" srcSet="" siz="100vw"/><source media="(m-width: 768px)" srcSet="" siz="100vw"/><img alt="Rememberg Séad O’Connor’s Sublime Mic and Righteo Rage" class="RponsiveImageContaer-eybHBd fptoWY rponsive-image__image" src="></noscript></picture></div></div></span></a></div><div class="SummaryItemContent-eiDYMl XMZX summary-em__ntent summary-em__ntent--no-bric"><a class="SummaryItemHedLk-civM fPFrPI summary-em-trackg__hed-lk summary-em__hed-lk" data-ponent-type="recirc-river" data-recirc-id="em-hed-2" data-recirc-pattern="summary-em" href=" target="_self"><div data-ttid="ClampWrapper" class="ClampWrapper-kZxfkB hTTNGO clamp SummaryItemHedBase-hiFYpQ hRVxvR summary-em__hed"><div class="ClampContent-hilPkr jVhSBH"><div class="SummaryItemHedTag-TWblf gxaOcP" data-ttid="SummaryItemHed">Rememberg Séad O’Connor’s Sublime Mic and Righteo Rage</div></div></div></a><div class="SummaryItemByleWrapper-boCfbi cuRXdL summary-em__byle-date-in"><div class="SummaryItemBaseByle-fFbXkY gRtaxp summary-em__byle"><div class="summary-em__byle__ntent"><div data-ttid="BylWrapper" class="BylWrapper-KIudk irTIfE byl"><p class="ByleWrapper-jWHrLH iNSiTG byle byl__byle" data-ttid="ByleWrapper" emProp="thor" emType="><span emProp="name" class="ByleNamWrapper-jbHncj fuDQVo"><span data-ttid="ByleName" class="ByleName-kwmrLn cYaBaU byle__name"><span class="BaseWrap-sc-gjQpdd BaseText-ewhhUZ BylePreamble-iJolpQ iUEiRd bIbWCO gnILss byle__preamble">By </span>Mike Hogan</span></span></p></div></div></div></div></div></div></li><li><div class="SummaryItemWrapper-iwvBff doDafW summary-em summary-em--has-borr summary-em--ARTICLE summary-em--no-in summary-em--text-align-left summary-em--layout-placement-si-by-si summary-em--layout-posn-image-left summary-em--layout-proportns-33-66 summary-em--si-by-si-align-center summary-em--si-by-si-image-right-mobile-false summary-em--standard RecircMostPopularSummaryItem-jQxxiw jkeAv" role="button" tabx="0"><div class="SummaryItemAssetContaer-gwhFFH VOyg summary-em__asset-ntaer"><a class="SummaryItemImageLk-dshqxb cPpCwE summary-em__image-lk summary-em-trackg__image-lk" href=" aria-hidn="te" tabx="-1" data-ponent-type="recirc-river" data-recirc-id="em-image-3" data-recirc-pattern="summary-em" target="_self"><span class="SpanWrapper-umhxW kGxnNB rponsive-asset SummaryItemRponsiveAsset-hjGIGg egpoQR summary-em__image"><div data-tt="aspect-rat-ntaer" class="AspectRatContaer-bJHpJz cCcPgL"><div class="aspect-rat--overlay-ntaer"><picture class="RponsiveImagePicture-cWuUZO dUOtEa SummaryItemRponsiveAsset-hjGIGg egpoQR summary-em__image rponsive-image"><noscript><source media="(max-width: 767px)" srcSet="" siz="100vw"/><source media="(m-width: 768px)" srcSet="" siz="100vw"/><img alt="Red, Whe & Royal Blue May Be “the Most Expensive B of Fan Fictn Ever”" class="RponsiveImageContaer-eybHBd fptoWY rponsive-image__image" src="></noscript></picture></div></div></span></a></div><div class="SummaryItemContent-eiDYMl XMZX summary-em__ntent summary-em__ntent--no-bric"><a class="SummaryItemHedLk-civM fPFrPI summary-em-trackg__hed-lk summary-em__hed-lk" data-ponent-type="recirc-river" data-recirc-id="em-hed-3" data-recirc-pattern="summary-em" href=" target="_self"><div data-ttid="ClampWrapper" class="ClampWrapper-kZxfkB hTTNGO clamp SummaryItemHedBase-hiFYpQ hRVxvR summary-em__hed"><div class="ClampContent-hilPkr jVhSBH"><div class="SummaryItemHedTag-TWblf gxaOcP" data-ttid="SummaryItemHed"><em>Red, Whe & Royal Blue</em> May Be “the Most Expensive B of Fan Fictn Ever”</div></div></div></a><div class="SummaryItemByleWrapper-boCfbi cuRXdL summary-em__byle-date-in"><div class="SummaryItemBaseByle-fFbXkY gRtaxp summary-em__byle"><div class="summary-em__byle__ntent"><div data-ttid="BylWrapper" class="BylWrapper-KIudk irTIfE byl"><p class="ByleWrapper-jWHrLH iNSiTG byle byl__byle" data-ttid="ByleWrapper" emProp="thor" emType="><span emProp="name" class="ByleNamWrapper-jbHncj fuDQVo"><span data-ttid="ByleName" class="ByleName-kwmrLn cYaBaU byle__name"><span class="BaseWrap-sc-gjQpdd BaseText-ewhhUZ BylePreamble-iJolpQ iUEiRd bIbWCO gnILss byle__preamble">By </span>Savannah Walsh</span></span></p></div></div></div></div></div></div></li><li><div class="AdWrapper-dQtivb fZrssQ RecircMostPopularSummaryItem-jQxxiw fHLKqj ad ad--asi"><div class="ad__slot ad__slot--asi" data-no-id="ixzjyf"></div></div></li></ul><div class="RecircMostPopularFooter-enPjgs eAuebe"></div></div></div></div><div class="StickyBoxPlaceholr-grPmrg dxAvXx"></div></div></div></div><div class="RowWrapper-UmqTg HEhan full-bleed-ad row-mid-ntent-ad"><div class="StickyMidContentAdWrapper-fSBzwl drzyIa ad-stickymidntent"><div class="AdWrapper-dQtivb fZrssQ ad ad--mid-ntent should-hold-space"><div class="ad__slot ad__slot--mid-ntent" data-no-id="4dsx9c"></div></div></div></div><div class="GridWrapper-cAzTTK kHBDeH grid grid-margs grid-ems-2 ArticlePageChunksGrid-hfxa bjczjj grid-layout--adrail narrow wi-adrail"><div class="GridItem-buujkM stRKV grid--em grid-layout__ntent"><div class="BodyWrapper-kufPGa lnwCqV body body__ntaer article__body" data-journey-hook="client-ntent" data-ttid="BodyWrapper"><div class="body__ner-ntaer"><p class="paywall">He remembers when Kristen was pregnant wh Cameron: “He was happy and proud; his baby was on the way. He had that cky attu, ‘I got a woman.’”</p><p class="paywall">Aaron’s iend Christa Tyser rells, “It wasn’t like a good relatnship or anythg. But after she got pregnant, I thk he felt like he had to stick wh her.” Christa hasn’t “known anybody who’s had an abortn—at my high school half the girls are pregnant.”</p><p class="paywall">“After his mom died, Aaron didn’t really re about anythg; he said he didn’t feel like he had anythg to do or anywhere to go—or any future,” Christa says. Odi says Aaron was “jt kd of floatg. Not everyone has hop and dreams the days—some people jt want to make through and still be able to se. Not everyone wants to be an astront or a movie star.”</p><p class="has-dropp paywall">Long before Cdy Dixon was found the snow, people assumed Rsell Henrson’s parents were ad. He never knew his father, and at age 10 he had been taken om his mother’s hoe, after reportedly havg been abed by var of his mother’s boyiends. He was raised by his strict Mormon grandparents and beme an honor stunt and a member of Future Farmers of Ameri. He pleted the requirements for the rank of Eagle Sut by cleang a lol cemetery, and had his picture taken wh the ernor and prted the *Boomerang.*Then he started hangg around wh guys like Aaron, qu school, and got a seri of menial jobs, the last of which was repairg roofs. He acquired a police rerd for dnken drivg and fightg wh a police officer.</p><p class="paywall">He and his girliend, Chasy Pasley, lived a $340-a-month trailer southwt Laramie. Their landlady, Sherry Aanenson, remembers Rsell as “quiet, pole, jt your average male…. He do what most guys do—hunt, fish, drk beer, there was a r he worked on.” She saw him as “pretty ntral—a follower.” A neighbor, however, plaed about his rowdy behavr. Chasy was a hman studyg art at U.W. at the time of the arrt. Her parents had spl when she was young; her father had moved to Alaska followg a ctody battle which he had unsuccsfully argued that her mother, Lda Larson, should lose ctody bee, he alleged, she was gay. Rsell and Chasy spent a lot of time wh Aaron and Kristen. The four of them nsired each other “bt bt iends.”</p><p class="has-dropp paywall">Tuday, October 6, was the birthday of Matthew’s old iend Walt Bouln, and they had planned to go to a movie. At 6:30, however, Matthew lled and nceled, tellg Walt he had to study for his French class. Then Matthew went to the weekly L.G.B.T.A. meetg, where plans were beg falized for the mp Gay Awarens Week, which would beg the followg Monday.</p><p class="paywall">Jim Osborn, the associatn chair, told the group that he had jt been harassed; he was walkg across mp when a guy me up to him and said, “You’re one of those faggots, aren’t you?” But Jim—a large man—punched his acster the face, and the guy ran away. After the meetg, the group went to the Village Inn, where Matthew ate cherry pie. He then tried to persua each of the members to acpany him to the Firi, but no one wanted to, and Kim Nash, a member of the L.G.B.T.A., drove him home. She watched until he went to his hoe. She thought he was for the night.</p><p class="has-dropp paywall">No one knows why Matthew was termed to go to the Firi that night, or why he left wh Aaron and Rsell. It was karaoke night, which would not ordarily have terted him. There was some speculatn that he was buyg dgs om Aaron and Rsell, but his iends fd that implsible. A close iend thks that prsn may have weakened his judgment, and wonrs if he had taken a heavy dose of Klonop before he went to the bar. “When he was prsed,” she says, “he would jt grab a handful.” Romae Patterson remembers how the ffee shop where she worked Matthew “would jt talk to anyone—people no one else would talk to, like this weird old man…. He had no discrimatn his person.”</p><p class="paywall">Matthew’s iends also fd hard to picture him beg sexually drawn to Aaron or Rsell. Nor do they thk that Matthew was terted a threome.</p><div data-attr-viewport-monor="le-recirc" class="le-recirc-wrapper le-recirc-observer-target-11 viewport-monor-anchor"></div><p class="paywall">But what if he was? The nials the prs seemed to suggt—as the old rape ethos—that Matthew had to have had no sexual tent orr not to be plic his own killg. Judy Shepard thks that night, like the Cody cint, was an example of Matthew’s “unterphobia.” Moreover, gettg ris wh strangers Laramie is not an unual or perilo thg to do.</p><p class="has-dropp paywall">The Firi is a rough bar, but not a menacg one. Big pup beer girls pop out of the walls, and a sign for the Wtern Athletic Conference reads, THE NEW WYOMING COWBOYS—READY TO KICK SOME WAC BUTT! A huge buffalo head ont of the D.J.’s booth blows smoke through s nostrils. The atmosphere is rowdy and iendly.</p><p class="paywall">Matt Galloway, a U.W. junr who was bartendg that Tuday, tells the story wh the perfect ntrasts of a Passn play. He started his shift at 10 P.M.; Matthew Shepard me half an hour later. Matthew—drsed jeans and a sport at—sat at the bar drkg a Heeken and a mixed drk and talkg to Galloway.</p><p class="paywall">Around 11:45, Aaron and Rsell me and orred a pcher of cheap beer, untg out the $5.50 quarters and dim. One of them had noticeably dirty hands; Galloway remembers wantg to unt their change out himself so as not to have handled by them. “It was ‘Gimme this, gimme that’—no ‘Thank you’s, no polens at all. The oppose of Matt.”</p><p class="paywall">Galloway scrib Matthew as “amazgly pole—soft-spoken, but well spoken. A person you n tell is kd—who would love to listen or be listened to.”</p><p class="paywall">Aaron and Rsell disappeared the directn of the pool table, but then returned to the bar. “They were here for [a while], out of beer, hangg out. They were g wh dim,” Galloway says. “Here’s this ltle kid, drsed very nice. Maybe they’ve seen him before and thought he was gay.”</p><p class="paywall">Matthew’s last beer st $2.50. “I went ahead and said, ‘Jt give me two bucks.’ He gave me three,” says Galloway.</p><p class="paywall">Shortly after midnight, the three of them left. As Matthew walked out the door, the D.J., Shadow, hand him what would be his last cigarette.</p><p class="paywall">“You got to smoke while you have ,” Mickelson later ments reflectively, shakg his head.</p><p class="has-dropp paywall">At 1:30 the morng on October 7, Aaron McKney me home disoriented and vered blood, Kristen Price explaed to the media after the murr. “He was cryg and he kept throwg up. He jt me and hugged me and said, ‘I’ve done somethg horrible. I serve to die.’” She asked what he had done and he said he wasn’t sure. “He said he thought maybe he killed somebody.”</p><p class="paywall">After she had cleaned him up, given him a glass of water, and laid him down, Aaron told her that “a guy walked up to him and said that he was gay and wanted to get wh Aaron and Rs,” Kristen said. “He got aggravated wh him and told him that he was straight and didn’t want anythg to do wh him and he walked off. Then later Aaron and Rs said, ‘Let’s pretend like we’re gay and we n—we’ll rob him and take his money.’</p><div data-attr-viewport-monor="le-recirc" class="le-recirc-wrapper le-recirc-observer-target-12 viewport-monor-anchor"></div><p class="paywall">“They jt wanted to beat him up bad enough to teach him a lson,” Kristen explaed, “not to e on to straight people and don’t be aggrsive about anymore.”</p><p class="paywall">Acrdg to the police, his nfsn Aaron said that durg the r ri Matthew had put his hand on his leg and asked, “When are we gog to get to where you live?” and Aaron told him, “Gus what? We’re not gay, and we’re gog to jack you up.” Aaron asked for Matthew’s wallet, which he gave to him, but they began to beat him anyway, wh the butt of a gun.</p><p class="paywall">Headg out of town, they drove about a e east, and then turned jt past the Wal-Mart to Sherman Hills—a hog velopment where Aaron had lived as a child. They ntued down a sandy dirt road, through sagebsh, until the road ad-end at a rough-hewn woon buck fence, at the borr of a property where a new hoe was unr nstctn.</p><p class="paywall">They bound Matthew’s hands together, behd his back, and then tied them to the fence, leavg his head and body cmpled near the ground (not a ccifixn posn). While Rsell tied the rope, Aaron took Matthew’s sho bee he thought his ptive would be able to ee himself and walk back to town. Then, acrdg to the police, Aaron ntued to beat him, while Rsell stood back, lghg.</p><p class="paywall">In his nfsn, Aaron said that Matthew had not ma a pass at them the bar, but did nce that he and Rsell had ma a plan to rob him. The reason they beat him after he was tied up was that they thought Matthew had seen their license-plate number. When they left, Aaron said, they assumed he was ad.</p><p class="paywall">Aaron and Rsell had planned to burglarize Matthew’s hoe, but they got distracted by a fight wh two Hispanic teenagers. Jeremy Herrera and Eiano Moral, both high-school dropouts, were walkg downtown near where Aaron and Rsell parked their tck. Jeremy and Eiano were bored; Jeremy had slashed a r tire “for shs and giggl,” he explaed to me. They bantered wh Aaron and Rsell, who “started talkg trash—‘Fuck you,’ llg bch and stuff,” Jeremy says—and then, acrdg to the teenagers, Aaron h Eiano wh a gun, bashg his skull. Next, Jeremy h Aaron the head wh a big stick he had hidn si his at. When the police showed up, Aaron and Rsell ran away, leavg their tck, which the police disvered Matthew’s cred rd and small patent-leather sho, along wh a .357 magnum vered blood.</p><p class="paywall">The afternoon after Aaron’s return to the apartment he shared wh Kristen, the two men and their girliends allegedly began to ordate the versn of events they would give to police. Then Kristen took Aaron to the hospal, where he was admted wh a hairle acture to the skull. Then, acrdg to police, she and Chasy cid to get rid of the evince. They drove the 50 to Cheyenne to dispose of Rsell’s bloody cloth. For some reason, they hid Rsell’s bloody sho separately, a storage shed at Chasy’s mother’s hoe.</p><p class="paywall">As happened, the nstctn crew that was workg at the new hoe on the property where Matthew clung to life was off that day. Although the police had Matthew’s personal effects, they had not yet put the crime together. Th was not until the followg eveng that Matthew was seen by the cyclist, a U.W. hman, Aaron Kreifels, who stopped bee he had fallen off his bike.</p><p class="has-dropp paywall">At the Poudre Valley Hospal Fort Colls, Colorado, Matthew lay bed down the hall om Aaron McKney. Matthew was atose; his bra stem—which ntrols heartbeat, breathg, temperature, and other voluntary functns—was severely damaged. He also was sufferg om hypothermia and had a red welt on his back, a red mark on his left arm, bised kne, cuts on his head, neck, and face, and bisg his gro.</p><p class="paywall">Ta and Phil arrived at the hospal Thursday morng. Matthew’s nt Roxanne and R. W. Eaton, her boyiend, were there om Denver, along wh some journalists. “There was gog to be a prs nference,” Ta says, and R.W. “was so antic; he said he didn’t want word gettg around that Matthew was gay…. R.W. and Roxy threatened that if we talked about we wouldn’t be allowed to see Matt.”</p><div data-attr-viewport-monor="le-recirc" class="le-recirc-wrapper le-recirc-observer-target-13 viewport-monor-anchor"></div><p class="paywall">When Ta was let to Matthew’s room, “ was btersweet to see what he looked like,” she says. “He had stch, bad cuts, welts, bis on his face. I had never seen anythg that severe. There was a big whe bandage on his head wh tub g out of . Bee of the rpirator his breathg sound very mechanil. His heart on the monor sound very loud—hntg. It remd me of the cint [ the limoe] where he listened to my heart. It was also a fortg sound—metronome-like. I uld feel his sence, his spir the room. It was like I uld feel angels, very posive fortg spirs the room—I thought he was gog to be O.K., he’s beg forted by all the angels. I uld feel that kd of fort reachg out to him.”</p></div></div></div><div class="GridItem-buujkM fVLMby grid--em grid-layout__asi"><div class="StickyBoxWrapper-jfYB jxBcTH sticky-box"><div class="StickyBoxPrimary-dzWDWL cdhYoN sticky-box__primary"><div class="AdWrapper-dQtivb fZrssQ ad ad--rail"><div class="ad__slot ad__slot--rail" data-no-id="r15"></div></div><div class="ConsumerMarketgUnThemedWrapper-iUTMTf jssHut nsumer-marketg-un nsumer-marketg-un--display-rail" role="prentatn" aria-hidn="te"><div class="nsumer-marketg-un__slot nsumer-marketg-un__slot--display-rail"></div><div class="journey-un"></div></div><div data-attr-viewport-monor="" class="RecircMostPopularWrapper-bRuGTi jkTTgR recirc-most-popular-wrapper viewport-monor-anchor"><div class="RecircMostPopularConter-jiViNn ktrplG recirc-most-popular-sparrow-trackg hi-asi-ad" data-most-popular-id="mod-most-popular-1116"><div class="RecircMostPopularHeadg-iVzhzt hBHzvB">Most Popular</div><ul class="RecircMostPopularItems-dCAajf gqcRrp"><li><div class="SummaryItemWrapper-iwvBff doDafW summary-em summary-em--has-borr summary-em--GALLERY summary-em--no-in summary-em--text-align-left summary-em--layout-placement-si-by-si summary-em--layout-posn-image-left summary-em--layout-proportns-33-66 summary-em--si-by-si-align-center summary-em--si-by-si-image-right-mobile-false summary-em--standard RecircMostPopularSummaryItem-jQxxiw jkeAv" role="button" tabx="0"><div class="SummaryItemAssetContaer-gwhFFH VOyg summary-em__asset-ntaer"><a class="SummaryItemImageLk-dshqxb cPpCwE summary-em__image-lk summary-em-trackg__image-lk" href=" aria-hidn="te" tabx="-1" data-ponent-type="recirc-river" data-recirc-id="em-image-1" data-recirc-pattern="summary-em" target="_self"><span class="SpanWrapper-umhxW kGxnNB rponsive-asset SummaryItemRponsiveAsset-hjGIGg egpoQR summary-em__image"><div data-tt="aspect-rat-ntaer" class="AspectRatContaer-bJHpJz cCcPgL"><div class="aspect-rat--overlay-ntaer"><picture class="RponsiveImagePicture-cWuUZO dUOtEa SummaryItemRponsiveAsset-hjGIGg egpoQR summary-em__image rponsive-image"><noscript><source media="(max-width: 767px)" srcSet="" siz="100vw"/><source media="(m-width: 768px)" srcSet="" siz="100vw"/><img alt="Vany Fair’s “It’s Rag Teens” Cover at 20: Where Are They Now?" class="RponsiveImageContaer-eybHBd fptoWY rponsive-image__image" src="></noscript></picture></div></div></span></a></div><div class="SummaryItemContent-eiDYMl XMZX summary-em__ntent summary-em__ntent--no-bric"><a class="SummaryItemHedLk-civM fPFrPI summary-em-trackg__hed-lk summary-em__hed-lk" data-ponent-type="recirc-river" data-recirc-id="em-hed-1" data-recirc-pattern="summary-em" href=" target="_self"><div data-ttid="ClampWrapper" class="ClampWrapper-kZxfkB hTTNGO clamp SummaryItemHedBase-hiFYpQ hRVxvR summary-em__hed"><div class="ClampContent-hilPkr jVhSBH"><div class="SummaryItemHedTag-TWblf gxaOcP" data-ttid="SummaryItemHed"><em>Vany Fair</em>’s “It’s Rag Teens” Cover at 20: Where Are They Now?</div></div></div></a><div class="SummaryItemByleWrapper-boCfbi cuRXdL summary-em__byle-date-in"><div class="SummaryItemBaseByle-fFbXkY gRtaxp summary-em__byle"><div class="summary-em__byle__ntent"><div data-ttid="BylWrapper" class="BylWrapper-KIudk irTIfE byl"><p class="ByleWrapper-jWHrLH iNSiTG byle byl__byle" data-ttid="ByleWrapper" emProp="thor" emType="><span emProp="name" class="ByleNamWrapper-jbHncj fuDQVo"><span data-ttid="ByleName" class="ByleName-kwmrLn cYaBaU byle__name"><span class="BaseWrap-sc-gjQpdd BaseText-ewhhUZ BylePreamble-iJolpQ iUEiRd bIbWCO gnILss byle__preamble">By </span>Savannah Walsh</span></span></p></div></div></div></div></div></div></li><li><div class="SummaryItemWrapper-iwvBff doDafW summary-em summary-em--has-borr summary-em--ARTICLE summary-em--no-in summary-em--text-align-left summary-em--layout-placement-si-by-si summary-em--layout-posn-image-left summary-em--layout-proportns-33-66 summary-em--si-by-si-align-center summary-em--si-by-si-image-right-mobile-false summary-em--standard RecircMostPopularSummaryItem-jQxxiw jkeAv" role="button" tabx="0"><div class="SummaryItemAssetContaer-gwhFFH VOyg summary-em__asset-ntaer"><a class="SummaryItemImageLk-dshqxb cPpCwE summary-em__image-lk summary-em-trackg__image-lk" href=" aria-hidn="te" tabx="-1" data-ponent-type="recirc-river" data-recirc-id="em-image-2" data-recirc-pattern="summary-em" target="_self"><span class="SpanWrapper-umhxW kGxnNB rponsive-asset SummaryItemRponsiveAsset-hjGIGg egpoQR summary-em__image"><div data-tt="aspect-rat-ntaer" class="AspectRatContaer-bJHpJz cCcPgL"><div class="aspect-rat--overlay-ntaer"><picture class="RponsiveImagePicture-cWuUZO dUOtEa SummaryItemRponsiveAsset-hjGIGg egpoQR summary-em__image rponsive-image"><noscript><source media="(max-width: 767px)" srcSet="" siz="100vw"/><source media="(m-width: 768px)" srcSet="" siz="100vw"/><img alt="Rememberg Séad O’Connor’s Sublime Mic and Righteo Rage" class="RponsiveImageContaer-eybHBd fptoWY rponsive-image__image" src="></noscript></picture></div></div></span></a></div><div class="SummaryItemContent-eiDYMl XMZX summary-em__ntent summary-em__ntent--no-bric"><a class="SummaryItemHedLk-civM fPFrPI summary-em-trackg__hed-lk summary-em__hed-lk" data-ponent-type="recirc-river" data-recirc-id="em-hed-2" data-recirc-pattern="summary-em" href=" target="_self"><div data-ttid="ClampWrapper" class="ClampWrapper-kZxfkB hTTNGO clamp SummaryItemHedBase-hiFYpQ hRVxvR summary-em__hed"><div class="ClampContent-hilPkr jVhSBH"><div class="SummaryItemHedTag-TWblf gxaOcP" data-ttid="SummaryItemHed">Rememberg Séad O’Connor’s Sublime Mic and Righteo Rage</div></div></div></a><div class="SummaryItemByleWrapper-boCfbi cuRXdL summary-em__byle-date-in"><div class="SummaryItemBaseByle-fFbXkY gRtaxp summary-em__byle"><div class="summary-em__byle__ntent"><div data-ttid="BylWrapper" class="BylWrapper-KIudk irTIfE byl"><p class="ByleWrapper-jWHrLH iNSiTG byle byl__byle" data-ttid="ByleWrapper" emProp="thor" emType="><span emProp="name" class="ByleNamWrapper-jbHncj fuDQVo"><span data-ttid="ByleName" class="ByleName-kwmrLn cYaBaU byle__name"><span class="BaseWrap-sc-gjQpdd BaseText-ewhhUZ BylePreamble-iJolpQ iUEiRd bIbWCO gnILss byle__preamble">By </span>Mike Hogan</span></span></p></div></div></div></div></div></div></li><li><div class="SummaryItemWrapper-iwvBff doDafW summary-em summary-em--has-borr summary-em--ARTICLE summary-em--no-in summary-em--text-align-left summary-em--layout-placement-si-by-si summary-em--layout-posn-image-left summary-em--layout-proportns-33-66 summary-em--si-by-si-align-center summary-em--si-by-si-image-right-mobile-false summary-em--standard RecircMostPopularSummaryItem-jQxxiw jkeAv" role="button" tabx="0"><div class="SummaryItemAssetContaer-gwhFFH VOyg summary-em__asset-ntaer"><a class="SummaryItemImageLk-dshqxb cPpCwE summary-em__image-lk summary-em-trackg__image-lk" href=" aria-hidn="te" tabx="-1" data-ponent-type="recirc-river" data-recirc-id="em-image-3" data-recirc-pattern="summary-em" target="_self"><span class="SpanWrapper-umhxW kGxnNB rponsive-asset SummaryItemRponsiveAsset-hjGIGg egpoQR summary-em__image"><div data-tt="aspect-rat-ntaer" class="AspectRatContaer-bJHpJz cCcPgL"><div class="aspect-rat--overlay-ntaer"><picture class="RponsiveImagePicture-cWuUZO dUOtEa SummaryItemRponsiveAsset-hjGIGg egpoQR summary-em__image rponsive-image"><noscript><source media="(max-width: 767px)" srcSet="" siz="100vw"/><source media="(m-width: 768px)" srcSet="" siz="100vw"/><img alt="Red, Whe & Royal Blue May Be “the Most Expensive B of Fan Fictn Ever”" class="RponsiveImageContaer-eybHBd fptoWY rponsive-image__image" src="></noscript></picture></div></div></span></a></div><div class="SummaryItemContent-eiDYMl XMZX summary-em__ntent summary-em__ntent--no-bric"><a class="SummaryItemHedLk-civM fPFrPI summary-em-trackg__hed-lk summary-em__hed-lk" data-ponent-type="recirc-river" data-recirc-id="em-hed-3" data-recirc-pattern="summary-em" href=" target="_self"><div data-ttid="ClampWrapper" class="ClampWrapper-kZxfkB hTTNGO clamp SummaryItemHedBase-hiFYpQ hRVxvR summary-em__hed"><div class="ClampContent-hilPkr jVhSBH"><div class="SummaryItemHedTag-TWblf gxaOcP" data-ttid="SummaryItemHed"><em>Red, Whe & Royal Blue</em> May Be “the Most Expensive B of Fan Fictn Ever”</div></div></div></a><div class="SummaryItemByleWrapper-boCfbi cuRXdL summary-em__byle-date-in"><div class="SummaryItemBaseByle-fFbXkY gRtaxp summary-em__byle"><div class="summary-em__byle__ntent"><div data-ttid="BylWrapper" class="BylWrapper-KIudk irTIfE byl"><p class="ByleWrapper-jWHrLH iNSiTG byle byl__byle" data-ttid="ByleWrapper" emProp="thor" emType="><span emProp="name" class="ByleNamWrapper-jbHncj fuDQVo"><span data-ttid="ByleName" class="ByleName-kwmrLn cYaBaU byle__name"><span class="BaseWrap-sc-gjQpdd BaseText-ewhhUZ BylePreamble-iJolpQ iUEiRd bIbWCO gnILss byle__preamble">By </span>Savannah Walsh</span></span></p></div></div></div></div></div></div></li><li><div class="AdWrapper-dQtivb fZrssQ RecircMostPopularSummaryItem-jQxxiw fHLKqj ad ad--asi"><div class="ad__slot ad__slot--asi" data-no-id="dpmvh"></div></div></li></ul><div class="RecircMostPopularFooter-enPjgs eAuebe"></div></div></div></div><div class="StickyBoxPlaceholr-grPmrg dxAvXx"></div></div></div></div><div class="RowWrapper-UmqTg HEhan full-bleed-ad row-mid-ntent-ad"><div class="StickyMidContentAdWrapper-fSBzwl drzyIa ad-stickymidntent"><div class="AdWrapper-dQtivb fZrssQ ad ad--mid-ntent should-hold-space"><div class="ad__slot ad__slot--mid-ntent" data-no-id="a97y2oj"></div></div></div></div><div class="GridWrapper-cAzTTK kHBDeH grid grid-margs grid-ems-2 ArticlePageChunksGrid-hfxa bjczjj grid-layout--adrail narrow wi-adrail"><div class="GridItem-buujkM stRKV grid--em grid-layout__ntent"><div class="BodyWrapper-kufPGa lnwCqV body body__ntaer article__body" data-journey-hook="client-ntent" data-ttid="BodyWrapper"><div class="body__ner-ntaer"><p class="paywall">Judy and Dennis Shepard arrived om Sdi Arabia on Friday night. The phone ll had e at four the morng; they had waed 20 hours for a flight to Amsterdam, and then flown on to Mneapolis to pick up their son Logan before ntug on to Colorado. The doctors told them that Matthew would never emerge om the a, but, Judy says, “we need to see him and we were aaid he would die before we got there.”</p><p class="paywall">In their son’s room “there was a sense of peace,” she ntu. “He looked so ltle. There were all the cuts on his face. I felt he was wh —but not the shell. Logan said this mt be Matt’s sty. Everythg mt have led to this pot. This mt be part of a larger plan.”</p><p class="paywall">“Perhaps God took him home to heal him,” a iend of Judy’s told her.</p><p class="has-dropp paywall">Matthew was not the first gay victim of an attack that year, or that week. The most recent F.B.I. statistics on hate crim the U.S. showed more than 1,400 attacks on gays 1997. A 1996 study showed that such attacks rulted 21 fatali. Moreover, studi show their aths are often particularly vic; many victims are btalized beyond regnn. In 1996, Dennis Phung was beaten to ath wh the claw end of a hammer his Hollywood apartment by two teenagers who left a mask on his head wh the words “gay bash” scrawled across , and Leeanne Keh of Downey, California, was shot and paralyzed by her father--law bee she was ntemplatg leavg her hband for a close female iend. Although nvictns were obtaed, outsi the gay prs the s disappeared.</p><p class="paywall">Matthew’s torment, however—om the first reports—evoked an extraordary rponse. Across the untry, the story drew ont-page verage for days. <em>Time</em> magaze’s ver, which was headled THE WAR OVER GAYS, was a photograph of the fence. “He wanted to fd love. But as he lay near ath, Matthew Shepard, through no choice of his own, had found martyrdom,” the article said. The fence had bee the crossroads of a civil-rights movement, and Matthew the most signifint symbol of vlence agast gays the history of the untry.</p><p class="paywall">Print Clton spoke about the ath, urgg Congrs to approve the Hate Crim Preventn Act, which would give feral agenci jurisdictn over bias cints. More than 50 ndlelight vigils were held around the untry, huge events where strangers wept and embraced one another. The Poudre Valley Hospal lobby was so crowd wh flowers that employe began puttg them other patients’ rooms.</p><p class="has-dropp paywall">When the Shepards disvered that the beatg was a natnal news story, Judy went to the bathroom and threw up. She uldn’t believe that “somethg so private had bee so public— was jt stolen om .” She “didn’t want to be exploed,” and she was worried about the prs “gog after an ugly way.”</p><p class="paywall">When the hospal received lls, Judy felt, “Why should we leave our son orr to talk to a stranger?” They were reluctant even to take a ll om Print Clton, but they did, and were glad they had. He was warm, and the nversatn seemed to help Logan. They told the print that Matthew had mpaigned for him twice, which seemed to startle him.</p><p class="paywall">The Inter played a ccial role nnectg people to the tragedy. Poudre Valley Hospal received so many lls about Matthew that twice-daily updat on his ndn were posted on a Web se; more than 800,000 hs were logged.</p><div data-attr-viewport-monor="le-recirc" class="le-recirc-wrapper le-recirc-observer-target-14 viewport-monor-anchor"></div><p class="paywall">Matthew lay atose for five days. Shortly after midnight on October 12, the first day of Natnal Gay Awarens Week, his heart stopped. Throughout Wyomg, flags were lowered to half-mast. “The fay exprsed gratu that they did not have to make a cisn about removg life support,” Rulon Stacey, the hospal C.E.O., told the prs, his voice choked wh emotn. “They said that like the good, rg son he was he removed om them the guilt and strs of makg that cisn.”</p><p class="paywall">Parents throughout the untry felt that Matthew uld have been their son, an ia many had never ntemplated before about a gay person. In part, this may have been a rult of the fact that while he was scribed as gay, the prs— unwtg lln wh homophobia—did not portray Matthew as a sexual adult. He was picted as havg parents, rather than partners—lovg, affluent, married Amerin parents. He had an allowance; he wore brac. He was a member of the U.W. Epispal Canterbury Club. He had a agile, childlike look—a look of pale pury, the translucent bety favored relig art.</p><p class="has-dropp paywall">In the midst of the natnal grief, there were a few who appld Aaron’s and Rsell’s actns, and was the voic that created the ntroversy which ma the ath a polil e. On Saturday afternoon, a few blocks om the hospal bed where Matthew’s parents were keepg vigil, a Colorado State Universy homeg para passed by. On a <em>Wizard of Oz</em> float sponsored by the Pi Kappa Alpha aterny and Alpha Chi Omega sorory, the srecrow character had been faced. Scrawled black spray pat was I’M GAY, as well as anti-homosexual obsceni. The tail that the cyclist who disvered Matthew had first mistaken him for a srecrow had been particularly chillg. Even dyg was not enough to make Matthew human to some of his peers.</p><p class="paywall">Hours after his ath, two gay anizatns received the msage “I hope happens more often.” At Matthew’s funeral Casper, protters om Reverend Fred Phelps’s Wtboro Baptist Church Topeka, Kansas, stood the snow and ra, rryg signs and chantg, “Fags die, God lghs.” Mourners blocked them and sang “Amazg Grace.” Insi St. Mark’s Epispal Church, where Matthew had been baptized as a teenager and beme an alyte, his godfather, Steve Gherg, a pilot for Northwt Airl, spoke. “There is an image seared upon my md when I reflect upon Matt on that woon crossrail fence,” he said. “However, I have found a different image to replace that wh and that is the image of another man, almost 2,000 years ago…. When I ncentrate on the Son of God beg ccified, only then n I be released om the bterns and anger I feel.”</p><p class="paywall"><em>Imat Christi</em>—the parallelg of Matthew’s life wh J’s—was a domant motif the memorial servic of many fahs. For many Laramie churchgoers, renceivg the homosexual (the outsir to the church) as the te Christian, and the Reverend Mr. Phelps and his ilk as the Pharise, was a radil ia. At the memorial service the Laramie Epispal church, the Reverend Dr. Chuck Denison told mourners that gay Christians had nothg to ask fivens for. Meha Fenimore, Matthew’s iend, rells that was the first time that she had ever heard that msage church: “It was so amazg—I realized I uld walk to the church holdg Hva’s [her girliend’s] hand.”</p><p class="has-dropp paywall">As soon as news of the beatg broke, Tiffany Edwards ma her way to Kristen and Aaron’s addrs North Laramie. Unsure which apartment the dgy buildg was theirs, she went to a dark hallway and knocked on the first door she me to; a girl emerged a cloud of stale smoke. “It was a dump,” the reporter says. “The smell was so disgtg— was like gog to a bar on Sunday morng.” She uld hear a baby whimperg. Tiffany told the girl she was lookg for Kristen Price, and the young woman said she didn’t know her. “She looked like a cute ltle high-school girl, but harned—wh a bad attu.”</p><p class="paywall">The morng of Kristen’s arraignment, Tiffany saw the young woman aga and realized who she was. Kristen was drsed a short pistach-green skirt and high heels—“lookg like a cheap floozy, all dolled up to go to jail. I was like: Girliend, get a clue.” A short time later Tiffany saw her the urthoe, the regulatn orange jumpsu. Kristen’s mother stood next to her, holdg her grandson. When Kristen was led off handcuffs, Tiffany noticed that she didn’t kiss her baby good-bye—or even look at him. She fears that baby “will be part of the vic cycle.”</p><p class="paywall">Kristen and Chasy were charged as accsori to murr after the fact (a crime that rri a penalty of up to three years jail), and Aaron and Rsell were charged wh kidnappg, aggravated robbery, and first-gree murr, punishable by ath. “The news has already taken this up and blew totally out of proportn, bee volved a homosexual,” Aaron’s father, Bill McKney, told <em>The Denver Post.</em> “Had this been a heterosexual the two boys cid to take out and rob, this never would have ma the natnal news.”</p><p class="paywall">Tiffany had been shocked by the different exprsns on the fac of Aaron and Rsell. At a recent urt appearance she noted how Aaron’s grandmother waved to him, and he turned, grned, and wked.</p><p class="has-dropp paywall">Shortly after Aaron and Rsell were taken to ctody, Eiano Moral and Jeremy Herrera were put on the dg AZT. After his fight wh Aaron McKney, Eiano had gone to the hospal, where he required 21 stapl to repair his cut skull. The doctor explaed to him that Matthew Shepard had been H.I.V.-posive and that bee Eiano had had blood ntact wh the gun, which had been vered Matthew’s blood, there was a small chance that Eiano uld have been fected. The doctor said that he—as well as Jeremy, who had some abrasns on his hands—need to start an immediate urse of meditn.</p><p class="paywall">For some of those close to Aaron and Rsell the news about the risk of fectn helped them persua themselv that Matthew was actually the dangero one. Matthew had sced Aaron and Rsell to mtg a crime, and now his ghost was tryg to poison them. Deanna Johnson, who is a close iend of Rsell’s grandmother’s, says that she has “very mixed feelgs” about the crime. “You know that murr is wrong, but you feel basilly that [the homosexual] liftyle is not right…. Matthew was not a sat—Matthew and his liftyle. I heard he was havg tts done que equently…. I am not faiar wh people like that. Sometim I’ve heard when people have [AIDS] they want to take as many people wh them as possible.” She says that she didn’t thk “there were many gay people” Laramie. But after the murr “a lot of them me out of the woodwork.”</p><div data-attr-viewport-monor="le-recirc" class="le-recirc-wrapper le-recirc-observer-target-15 viewport-monor-anchor"></div><p class="paywall">Everywhere Wyomg, homosexualy is so near and so far away—visible and visible. As wh many prejudic, homophobia allows for dividual exceptns. Tyler Kern, who dated Matthew for a short time the fall, was also a iend of Chasy’s and ocsnally hung out wh her, Rsell, Aaron, and Kristen (although he never me out to them). Acrdg to sourc close to the fense, the fense plans to argue that neher Kristen nor Chasy grew up a homophobic atmosphere, and fact both had close fay members who were lbians. Chasy’s job at U.W. volved dog some cleril work for the L.G.B.T.A., and she was iendly wh Jim Osborn, who at the time chaired the group. There was speculatn about reprsed homoerotic sire between Aaron and Rsell; acrdg to this theory, they were bondg over mutilatg a betiful man.</p><p class="paywall">Aaron’s iend Odi don’t fd the fact that Aaron’s and Rsell’s girliends have close fay members who are lbians paradoxil. Like many people Laramie he thks lbianism is “much ls repulsive” than male homosexualy. At other tim, however, he thks “’s all wrong altogether … bee of God and what the Bible says.” He says that “Aaron believed God like most people.”</p><p class="paywall">“A kid on the street, they feel someone oppos them—’s him or them,” he says. “Anger is all men’s hearts; some are aaid to do what’s their hearts…. Ne tim out of 10 you’re aaid to do what you say you’re gog to do, and this time he wasn’t. Jt the right suatn, the right time.</p><p class="paywall">“What would I thk if I heard all the voic your head?” he asks me. “What would you thk if you heard me? Haven’t you ever wanted to h someone?”</p><p class="has-dropp paywall">It remas to be seen whether Matthew’s ath will endure as a symbol of the vlence of homophobia, but awarens of prejudice is part of the legacy of Matthew Shepard. Obvly, the killg was about homosexualy, perhaps sharpened by class envy and by dgs as well. But uld Aaron and Rsell have murred someone else for some other reason? They cracked open Eiano’s skull the same night while shoutg slurs. At the ept level, murr is simply about murr, about havg the pacy, rage, and will to do , and about fdg a victim who n be humanized by the shallowt of spells—“gay,” “faggot,” “fairy.” The spell seems to have been already wearg off by the time Aaron got home that night. “I serve to die,” he told Kristen, his victim growg ld, his feelgs returng to himself.</p><p class="has-dropp paywall">On December 28, District Attorney Cal Recha elected to seek the ath penalty agast both Aaron and Rsell. Some of Matthew’s iends wonr if was what he would want. Brian Goon rells how “when people would make ments, like ‘Hey, faggot,’ he wouldn’t react…. If anyone lived the Christian ial of turn the other cheek, was Matt. I scerely believe that Matt would have fiven those people.” But Judy says that Matthew believed the ath penalty for heo crim. “I believe my heart that if this had happened to a iend of Matt’s he would thk the ath penalty was jt.”</p><p class="paywall">She rells the way Aaron appeared at the hearg. “It looks like his ey are ad—ad si,” she says. “I believe evil. I believe there are people who have no souls. I believe there are people out there who have no feelg for what’s right or wrong—who enjoy hurtg others.”</p><p class="paywall">“Did [Matthew] ask you to stop?” the police had asked Aaron.</p><p class="paywall">“Well, yeah,” he replied, “he was gettg the sh kicked out of him.” Judy feels that if Aaron had any remorse he would not have ed that phrase to scribe what he did to her son. She also thks about how Aaron and Rsell took Matthew’s sho that night, as the rapists had done Moroc. “It was one of the tangible thgs he uld pot to that had been taken om him Moroc. He plaed about endlsly—‘my favore pair of sho.’ I had this visual image of Matt pleadg wh Aaron and Rsell not to take his sho.”</p><p class="has-dropp paywall">For Tiffany Edwards, the ia that Aaron and Rsell may have been exposed to H.I.V. om Matthew would be “Karmic, stant, ultimate jtice.”</p><p class="paywall">No one close to Matthew knew that he was H.I.V.-posive—or thks that he himself knew. The fectn, tected the hospal, is thought to have been a very recent one. Judy Shepard rells that sce the rape her son had been tted perdilly and the rults had been negative. Ta, Romae, and Brian all feel that Matthew—who supported Romae through her brother’s ath om AIDS—would have nfid them. “He wasn’t a secret-keeper,” his mother says. But there is a great al of ncern that, as Brian puts , the revelatn of his illns “uld be ed agast him somehow—make people thk his ath was ls tragic bee he was gog to die anyway.” H.I.V.-posive people often have to fight agast the stereotype of certa doom; Brian and others emphasize that a healthy young person like Matthew might live wh H.I.V. for s, by which time there may be a cure.</p><div data-attr-viewport-monor="le-recirc" class="le-recirc-wrapper le-recirc-observer-target-16 viewport-monor-anchor"></div><p class="paywall">Matthew’s iends agree that the stigmatizatn of people wh H.I.V. would not be somethg Matthew (who worked for AIDS ) would want to llaborate by censorg the fact of his fectn as if were shameful. His iends exprs the same hatn when speakg about some of his other troubl—his prsn and rape—fearg that the thgs uld also be obliquely blamed on the victim. But the people clost to Matthew are mted to rememberg him as he was. They have fah that, for most people, troubl make a portra more, not ls, human and epen the poignancy of a ath.</p><p class="paywall">“He wasn’t a sat,” Judy says. “He was jt a young man search of himself.” She is disturbed by parisons between Matthew and J. “You mt unrstand, ’s like puttg him on a pestal that jt won’t work,” she says. “I’m ncerned that if people fd out that ’s not te, they’ll be disappoted or angry or hate him.”</p><p class="paywall">Sce Matthew’s ath, his fay has received more than 8,000 letters and rds, all of which Judy plans to reply to. Prents ntue to arrive as well—mementos om the vigils, a quilt of signatur om a llege Ptsburgh, CDs, origal mic, poems, stuffed animals, angels, ornaments, books on grief.</p><p class="paywall">Many of the letters have enclosed checks, for small and large amounts, which has led Dennis and Judy to tablish the Matthew Shepard Foundatn to support thgs that Matthew believed —mental health, gay support groups, AIDS , human rights, homels teenagers. Many polil groups have been lobbyg for their support, but Dennis and Judy want to study issu such as hate-crime legislatn before takg a posn on them. Judy says she has never seen herself as someone who is fortable the public eye. Growg up the small town of Glenrock, Wyomg, Judy wanted to be jt what she beme. “I want to go back to my former reer as a hoewife and mom,” she says, “but I n’t. When Logan said this was Matt’s sty, I said to him, ‘What is our sty? What rners are we gog to turn?’ Matt’s jt phg me down this path bee he thks I n do —he’s wh me.”</p></div></div></div><div class="GridItem-buujkM fVLMby grid--em grid-layout__asi"><div class="StickyBoxWrapper-jfYB jxBcTH sticky-box"><div class="StickyBoxPrimary-dzWDWL cdhYoN sticky-box__primary"><div class="AdWrapper-dQtivb fZrssQ ad ad--rail"><div class="ad__slot ad__slot--rail" data-no-id="2l2ubg"></div></div><div class="ConsumerMarketgUnThemedWrapper-iUTMTf jssHut nsumer-marketg-un nsumer-marketg-un--display-rail" role="prentatn" aria-hidn="te"><div class="nsumer-marketg-un__slot nsumer-marketg-un__slot--display-rail"></div><div class="journey-un"></div></div><div data-attr-viewport-monor="" class="RecircMostPopularWrapper-bRuGTi jkTTgR recirc-most-popular-wrapper viewport-monor-anchor"><div class="RecircMostPopularConter-jiViNn ktrplG recirc-most-popular-sparrow-trackg hi-asi-ad" data-most-popular-id="mod-most-popular-1117"><div class="RecircMostPopularHeadg-iVzhzt hBHzvB">Most 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article__body" data-journey-hook="client-ntent" data-ttid="BodyWrapper"><div class="body__ner-ntaer"><p class="paywall">Judy rells how, when Matthew would overdraw his bank acunt, “he’d say, ‘Someday when I’m rich, I’ll pay you back for all the overdrafts.’ And then he’d say, ‘Do you thk I’ll be rich? Do you thk I’ll be famo?’ I would say, ‘Absolutely—God would not put you through all this and not let you be famo.’”</p><p class="paywall">She is a strong woman: she cri equently, while talkg about Matthew, but she bsh the tears om her face and keeps talkg. Hers is the grief of one nfint of love given and received—so different om how one imag the grief of another mother: Cdy Dixon, stumblg through the snow knowg that her only son—a prisoner—had reportedly refed her vis. Rsell Henrson was not allowed to attend his mother’s funeral. It was feared the crowd would hurt him.</p><p class="has-dropp paywall">In Laramie, elementary-school kids signed and wore yellow rdboard badg which said that they had pledged never to hurt another person bee they were different om them. A graduate of Laramie High School says that she ed to ll her brother a fag whenever she was mad at him, but that recently her mother had told her not to e that word anymore.</p><p class="paywall">“We were the last group was O.K. to hate,” Kim Nash, a member of the L.G.B.T.A., says. “Bee of Matthew’s ath ’s a ltle ls O.K.”</p><p class="paywall">The Saturday followg the attack, the L.G.B.T.A. marched for Matthew at the homeg para after the football game. Although Matt Galloway was apprehensive, he went and marched, along wh hundreds of others, wearg yellow armbands and rryg NO HATE IN OUR STATE signs. “It was the greatt experience of my life,” he says. “People me up to me and thanked me.” After the killg, he got ught up talkg to the media, “but I had to e to terms wh Matthew’s ath for myself,” and on the first quiet day, “I went and locked myself my hoe and … cried for three hours straight.” He cid he wanted to get to know some of the gay muny, and he went to dner wh three of Matthew’s gay iends, “and they were some of the most betiful people I’ve ever met.” After his televisn appearanc he got some lls om gay men askg if he was available, and he found himself tellg them that he was straight, but that if they were terted beg iends, he was too.</p><div data-attr-viewport-monor="le-recirc" class="le-recirc-wrapper le-recirc-observer-target-17 viewport-monor-anchor"></div><p class="paywall">Ta Labrie stggl not to let herself be nsumed by sadns. “There are days I thk of jog Matt, but I know he’d be very disappoted if I showed up Heaven.” After Matthew’s ath she got permissn om her landlord to adopt Matthew’s t, Clayton. “I fally found the bt iend of a lifetime and then he’s gone. They stole my iend,” she said, her voice paed and puzzled.</p><p class="has-dropp paywall">Romae Patterson feels that the prs and the natnal attentn have “helped lift me out of the p of personal sorrow.” In the ffee shop where she works, she hears people discsg the murr—gay people and straight people. At a vigil Denver the day Matthew died, Romae stood on the steps of the pol ont of a photo of Matthew which was attached to a repli of the woon fence—a agile fense agast loss—and told the crowd: “The person Matthew was sh all your fac. I am sure Matthew feels your love. Thank you all for beg here tonight to help Matthew take one more step towards his goals and dreams.”</p><p class="paywall">Doc O’Connor remembers the phone ll he got om his mother the day Matthew was found. “Her voice is teary. I thk somebody my fay’s died. She says, ‘It’s such a shame about that Matthew Shepard—and you knew him.’ ”</p><p class="paywall">“I’d only known him four days,” he says, “but the thg is we had a good nnectn.” He says he remembers how Kristen didn’t seem upset when she told him that Aaron had beaten some gay guy. He knows that “Krissy might have got six months’ probatn if I didn’t tell the police what I knew…. I like her—she’s a nice girl—but she’s got to get her jt serts.”</p><p class="paywall">“Matthew knew he was gog to die,” Doc says. “He said he was gog to get beaten or strangled—he wasn’t sure which. The last time we talked, he said, ‘When I get done bee I’m gay, if one gay person and one straight person e together and stop to thk that we’re both people, that would be somethg’—he would have acplished somethg. And then, four days later, the whole untry together. He’s bigger than kgs and queens. One person told me he wanted to look up the Book of Revelatn. Matthew Shepard—that’s a pretty spirual name. Who do you know who is as big today—who reached out and touched as many people as Matthew Shepard of Laramie, Wyomg, populatn 27K?”</p></div></div></div><div class="GridItem-buujkM fVLMby grid--em grid-layout__asi"><div class="StickyBoxWrapper-jfYB jxBcTH sticky-box"><div class="StickyBoxPrimary-dzWDWL cdhYoN sticky-box__primary"><div class="AdWrapper-dQtivb fZrssQ ad ad--rail"><div class="ad__slot ad__slot--rail" data-no-id="z7xi7r"></div></div><div class="ConsumerMarketgUnThemedWrapper-iUTMTf jssHut nsumer-marketg-un nsumer-marketg-un--display-rail" role="prentatn" aria-hidn="te"><div class="nsumer-marketg-un__slot nsumer-marketg-un__slot--display-rail"></div><div class="journey-un"></div></div></div><div class="StickyBoxPlaceholr-grPmrg dxAvXx"></div></div></div></div></div><div class="GridWrapper-cAzTTK kHBDeH grid grid-margs grid-ems-2 PaywallInleBarrierWhWrapperGrid-fyrGfS kLQIUk grid-layout--adrail narrow wi-adrail"><div class="GridItem-buujkM stRKV grid--em grid-layout__ntent"><div class="body body__le-barrier article__body"><div class="ntaer ntaer--body"><div class="ntaer--body-ner"><asi class="PaywallInleBarrierWrapper-iBnuqk lfXXa-D" data-ttid="PaywallInleBarrierWrapper"><div class="ConsumerMarketgUnThemedWrapper-iUTMTf jssHut nsumer-marketg-un nsumer-marketg-un--paywall-le-barrier" role="prentatn" aria-live="pole" aria-hidn="te"><div class="nsumer-marketg-un__slot nsumer-marketg-un__slot--paywall-le-barrier"></div><div class="journey-un"></div></div></asi></div></div></div></div></div></div><div class="GridWrapper-cAzTTK kHBDeH grid grid-margs grid-ems-2 ContentWrapperGrid-fvkmBv brYtrA grid-layout--adrail narrow wi-adrail"><div class="GridItem-buujkM stRKV grid--em grid-layout__ntent"><div class="body body__ntaer"><div class="ntaer ntaer--body"><div class="ntaer--body-ner"></div></div></div></div></div></div></article><div class="ContentFooterWrapper-jVNdRG dTJkpP ArticlePageContentFooterGrid-ccsXYy eMZRHU article-body__footer"><div class="ContentFooterContributorSpotlightWrapper-jglHff edmTAt"><sectn data-ttid="ContributorSpotlightContaer" class="ContributorSpotlightContaer-ccVxgz fwlOPD"><div class="ContributorSpotlightInnerContaer-elBox jSvXVx"><div class="ContributorSpotlightSgleColumn-idLiJU goRdaE"><sectn class="ContributorSpotlightSummaryGrid-jZdHDE hJMn"><div class="GridWrapper-cAzTTK hvFIAc grid grid-ems-2 ContributorSpotlightMaSectnGrid-kYVLYK gpZeIC"><div class="GridItem-buujkM eHLzLy grid--em"></div><div class="GridItem-buujkM kHPPIF grid--em"></div></div></sectn></div></div></sectn></div><div class="RowWrapper-UmqTg HEhan"><div class="GridWrapper-cAzTTK kHBDeH grid grid-margs grid-ems-2 grid-layout--adrail narrow wi-adrail"><div class="GridItem-buujkM stRKV grid--em grid-layout__ntent"></div></div></div><div data-ttid="ContentFooterBottom" class="ContentFooterBottom-jwWZfC kcbyiW"><div class="ntent-bottom-anchor"></div><div class="ConsumerMarketgUnThemedWrapper-iUTMTf jssHut nsumer-marketg-un 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class="RponsiveImagePicture-cWuUZO dUOtEa SummaryItemRponsiveAsset-hjGIGg bDvSkO summary-em__image rponsive-image"><noscript><source media="(max-width: 767px)" srcSet="" siz="100vw"/><source media="(m-width: 768px)" srcSet="" siz="100vw"/><img alt="Ezra Miller’s “Msiah” Delns: Insi The Flash Star’s Dark Spiral" class="RponsiveImageContaer-eybHBd fptoWY rponsive-image__image" src="></noscript></picture></div></div></span></a></div><div class="SummaryItemContent-eiDYMl XMZX summary-em__ntent"><div class="RubricWrapper-dKmCNX hXRWeY bric bric--disvery SummaryItemRubric-dguGKN lapGFj summary-em__bric"><span class="RubricName-fVtemz cLxcNi">Hollywood</span></div><a class="SummaryItemHedLk-civM cxlTHI summary-em-trackg__hed-lk summary-em__hed-lk" data-ponent-type="recirc-river" data-recirc-id="em-hed-1" data-recirc-pattern="summary-em" href=" target="_self"><div data-ttid="ClampWrapper" class="ClampWrapper-kZxfkB hTTNGO clamp SummaryItemHedBase-hiFYpQ drYWLe summary-em__hed"><div class="ClampContent-hilPkr jVhSBH"><div class="SummaryItemHedTag-TWblf gxaOcP" data-ttid="SummaryItemHed">Ezra Miller’s “Msiah” Delns: Insi <em>The Flash</em> Star’s Dark Spiral</div></div></div></a><div class="BaseWrap-sc-gjQpdd BaseText-ewhhUZ SummaryItemDek-CRfsi iUEiRd ijSOpT jDyfzW summary-em__k">They’re one of Hollywood’s brightt stars—and most troubled actors. Amid safety ncerns, and anxiety over the fate of a $200 ln movie, <em>VF</em> unearths disturbg new tails a saga of grandse sermons, guns, dgs, and alleged asslts and groomg.</div><div class="SummaryItemByleWrapper-boCfbi cuRXdL summary-em__byle-date-in"><div class="SummaryItemBaseByle-fFbXkY gRtaxp summary-em__byle"><div class="summary-em__byle__ntent"><div data-ttid="BylWrapper" class="BylWrapper-KIudk irTIfE byl"><p class="ByleWrapper-jWHrLH iNSiTG byle byl__byle" data-ttid="ByleWrapper" emProp="thor" emType="><span emProp="name" class="ByleNamWrapper-jbHncj fuDQVo"><span data-ttid="ByleName" class="ByleName-kwmrLn cYaBaU byle__name"><span class="BaseWrap-sc-gjQpdd BaseText-ewhhUZ BylePreamble-iJolpQ iUEiRd bIbWCO gnILss byle__preamble">By </span>Julie Miller</span></span></p></div></div></div></div></div></div><div class="SummaryItemWrapper-iwvBff gjCHLu summary-em summary-em--has-le summary-em--ARTICLE summary-em--no-in summary-em--text-align-left summary-em--layout-placement-text-below summary-em--layout-posn-image-left summary-em--layout-proportns-50-50 summary-em--si-by-si-align-center summary-em--si-by-si-image-right-mobile-false summary-em--standard SummaryCollectnGridSummaryItem-WColm ktxezM" role="button" tabx="0"><div class="SummaryItemAssetContaer-gwhFFH VOyg summary-em__asset-ntaer"><a class="SummaryItemImageLk-dshqxb cPpCwE summary-em__image-lk summary-em-trackg__image-lk" href=" aria-hidn="te" tabx="-1" data-ponent-type="recirc-river" data-recirc-id="em-image-2" data-recirc-pattern="summary-em" target="_self"><span class="SpanWrapper-umhxW kGxnNB rponsive-asset SummaryItemRponsiveAsset-hjGIGg bDvSkO summary-em__image"><div data-tt="aspect-rat-ntaer" class="AspectRatContaer-bJHpJz cCcPgL"><div class="aspect-rat--overlay-ntaer"><picture class="RponsiveImagePicture-cWuUZO dUOtEa SummaryItemRponsiveAsset-hjGIGg bDvSkO summary-em__image rponsive-image"><noscript><source media="(max-width: 767px)" srcSet="" siz="100vw"/><source media="(m-width: 768px)" srcSet="" siz="100vw"/><img alt="“Maybe It Wasn’t Vlent, but It Was Rape”: Constance Wu Is Ready to Tell Her Story" class="RponsiveImageContaer-eybHBd fptoWY rponsive-image__image" src="></noscript></picture></div></div></span></a></div><div class="SummaryItemContent-eiDYMl XMZX summary-em__ntent"><div class="RubricWrapper-dKmCNX hXRWeY bric bric--disvery SummaryItemRubric-dguGKN lapGFj summary-em__bric"><span class="RubricName-fVtemz cLxcNi">Movi</span></div><a class="SummaryItemHedLk-civM cxlTHI summary-em-trackg__hed-lk summary-em__hed-lk" data-ponent-type="recirc-river" data-recirc-id="em-hed-2" data-recirc-pattern="summary-em" href=" target="_self"><div data-ttid="ClampWrapper" class="ClampWrapper-kZxfkB hTTNGO clamp SummaryItemHedBase-hiFYpQ drYWLe summary-em__hed"><div class="ClampContent-hilPkr jVhSBH"><div class="SummaryItemHedTag-TWblf gxaOcP" data-ttid="SummaryItemHed">“Maybe It Wasn’t Vlent, but It Was Rape”: Constance Wu Is Ready to Tell Her Story</div></div></div></a><div class="BaseWrap-sc-gjQpdd BaseText-ewhhUZ SummaryItemDek-CRfsi iUEiRd ijSOpT jDyfzW summary-em__k">When she was her 20s, the star of <em>Crazy Rich Asians</em> was raped. In this powerful excerpt om her memoir, <em>Makg a Scene,</em> she wonrs why took her so long to regnize that.</div><div class="SummaryItemByleWrapper-boCfbi cuRXdL summary-em__byle-date-in"><div class="SummaryItemBaseByle-fFbXkY gRtaxp summary-em__byle"><div class="summary-em__byle__ntent"><div data-ttid="BylWrapper" class="BylWrapper-KIudk irTIfE byl"><p class="ByleWrapper-jWHrLH iNSiTG byle byl__byle" data-ttid="ByleWrapper" emProp="thor" emType="><span emProp="name" class="ByleNamWrapper-jbHncj fuDQVo"><span data-ttid="ByleName" class="ByleName-kwmrLn cYaBaU byle__name"><span class="BaseWrap-sc-gjQpdd BaseText-ewhhUZ BylePreamble-iJolpQ iUEiRd bIbWCO gnILss byle__preamble">By </span>Constance Wu</span></span></p></div></div></div></div></div></div><div class="SummaryItemWrapper-iwvBff gjCHLu summary-em summary-em--has-le summary-em--ARTICLE summary-em--no-in summary-em--text-align-left summary-em--layout-placement-text-below summary-em--layout-posn-image-left summary-em--layout-proportns-50-50 summary-em--si-by-si-align-center summary-em--si-by-si-image-right-mobile-false summary-em--standard SummaryCollectnGridSummaryItem-WColm ktxezM" role="button" tabx="0"><div class="SummaryItemAssetContaer-gwhFFH VOyg summary-em__asset-ntaer"><a class="SummaryItemImageLk-dshqxb cPpCwE summary-em__image-lk summary-em-trackg__image-lk" href=" aria-hidn="te" tabx="-1" data-ponent-type="recirc-river" data-recirc-id="em-image-3" data-recirc-pattern="summary-em" target="_self"><span class="SpanWrapper-umhxW kGxnNB rponsive-asset SummaryItemRponsiveAsset-hjGIGg bDvSkO summary-em__image"><div data-tt="aspect-rat-ntaer" class="AspectRatContaer-bJHpJz cCcPgL"><div class="aspect-rat--overlay-ntaer"><picture class="RponsiveImagePicture-cWuUZO dUOtEa SummaryItemRponsiveAsset-hjGIGg bDvSkO summary-em__image rponsive-image"><noscript><source media="(max-width: 767px)" srcSet="" siz="100vw"/><source media="(m-width: 768px)" srcSet="" siz="100vw"/><img alt="“Fuck Bin,” “Don’t Tread on Me,” and a Wisns Death Trip for Our Tim" class="RponsiveImageContaer-eybHBd fptoWY rponsive-image__image" src="></noscript></picture></div></div></span></a></div><div class="SummaryItemContent-eiDYMl XMZX summary-em__ntent"><div class="RubricWrapper-dKmCNX hXRWeY bric bric--disvery SummaryItemRubric-dguGKN lapGFj summary-em__bric"><span class="RubricName-fVtemz cLxcNi">Polics</span></div><a class="SummaryItemHedLk-civM cxlTHI summary-em-trackg__hed-lk summary-em__hed-lk" data-ponent-type="recirc-river" data-recirc-id="em-hed-3" data-recirc-pattern="summary-em" href=" target="_self"><div data-ttid="ClampWrapper" class="ClampWrapper-kZxfkB hTTNGO clamp SummaryItemHedBase-hiFYpQ drYWLe summary-em__hed"><div class="ClampContent-hilPkr jVhSBH"><div class="SummaryItemHedTag-TWblf gxaOcP" data-ttid="SummaryItemHed">“Fuck Bin,” “Don’t Tread on Me,” and a Wisns Death Trip for Our Tim</div></div></div></a><div class="BaseWrap-sc-gjQpdd BaseText-ewhhUZ SummaryItemDek-CRfsi iUEiRd ijSOpT jDyfzW summary-em__k">The thor knocks on the doors bearg the darkt symbols, behd which lie guns, ammo, antisemism, antiabortn dogma—and a belief the g civil war.</div><div class="SummaryItemByleWrapper-boCfbi cuRXdL summary-em__byle-date-in"><div class="SummaryItemBaseByle-fFbXkY gRtaxp summary-em__byle"><div class="summary-em__byle__ntent"><div data-ttid="BylWrapper" class="BylWrapper-KIudk irTIfE byl"><p class="ByleWrapper-jWHrLH iNSiTG byle byl__byle" data-ttid="ByleWrapper" emProp="thor" emType="><span emProp="name" class="ByleNamWrapper-jbHncj fuDQVo"><span data-ttid="ByleName" class="ByleName-kwmrLn cYaBaU byle__name"><span class="BaseWrap-sc-gjQpdd BaseText-ewhhUZ BylePreamble-iJolpQ iUEiRd bIbWCO gnILss byle__preamble">By </span>Jeff Sharlet</span></span></p></div></div></div></div></div></div><div class="AdWrapper-dQtivb fZrssQ SummaryCollectnGridSummaryItem-WColm ktxezM ad ad--read-more"><div class="ad__slot ad__slot--read-more" data-no-id="0q9x1g"></div></div><div class="SummaryItemWrapper-iwvBff gjCHLu summary-em summary-em--has-le summary-em--ARTICLE summary-em--no-in summary-em--text-align-left summary-em--layout-placement-text-below summary-em--layout-posn-image-left summary-em--layout-proportns-50-50 summary-em--si-by-si-align-center summary-em--si-by-si-image-right-mobile-false summary-em--standard SummaryCollectnGridSummaryItem-WColm ktxezM" role="button" tabx="0"><div class="SummaryItemAssetContaer-gwhFFH VOyg summary-em__asset-ntaer"><a class="SummaryItemImageLk-dshqxb cPpCwE summary-em__image-lk summary-em-trackg__image-lk" href=" aria-hidn="te" tabx="-1" data-ponent-type="recirc-river" data-recirc-id="em-image-4" data-recirc-pattern="summary-em" target="_self"><span class="SpanWrapper-umhxW kGxnNB rponsive-asset SummaryItemRponsiveAsset-hjGIGg bDvSkO summary-em__image"><div data-tt="aspect-rat-ntaer" class="AspectRatContaer-bJHpJz cCcPgL"><div class="aspect-rat--overlay-ntaer"><picture class="RponsiveImagePicture-cWuUZO dUOtEa SummaryItemRponsiveAsset-hjGIGg bDvSkO summary-em__image rponsive-image"><noscript><source media="(max-width: 767px)" srcSet="" siz="100vw"/><source media="(m-width: 768px)" srcSet="" siz="100vw"/><img alt="Lizzo Is Here to Talk About All of It&-That Flute, That Lyric, Her Man, and More" class="RponsiveImageContaer-eybHBd fptoWY rponsive-image__image" src="></noscript></picture></div></div></span></a></div><div class="SummaryItemContent-eiDYMl XMZX summary-em__ntent"><div class="RubricWrapper-dKmCNX hXRWeY bric bric--disvery SummaryItemRubric-dguGKN lapGFj summary-em__bric"><span class="RubricName-fVtemz cLxcNi">Celebry</span></div><a class="SummaryItemHedLk-civM cxlTHI summary-em-trackg__hed-lk summary-em__hed-lk" data-ponent-type="recirc-river" data-recirc-id="em-hed-4" data-recirc-pattern="summary-em" href=" target="_self"><div data-ttid="ClampWrapper" class="ClampWrapper-kZxfkB hTTNGO clamp SummaryItemHedBase-hiFYpQ drYWLe summary-em__hed"><div class="ClampContent-hilPkr jVhSBH"><div class="SummaryItemHedTag-TWblf gxaOcP" data-ttid="SummaryItemHed">Lizzo Is Here to Talk About All of It—That Flute, That Lyric, Her Man, and More</div></div></div></a><div class="BaseWrap-sc-gjQpdd BaseText-ewhhUZ SummaryItemDek-CRfsi iUEiRd ijSOpT jDyfzW summary-em__k">The Emmy- and Grammy-wng superstar fltist giv <em>Vany Fair</em> sight to her art, and the nuanc of posivy.</div><div class="SummaryItemByleWrapper-boCfbi cuRXdL summary-em__byle-date-in"><div class="SummaryItemBaseByle-fFbXkY gRtaxp summary-em__byle"><div class="summary-em__byle__ntent"><div data-ttid="BylWrapper" class="BylWrapper-KIudk irTIfE byl"><p class="ByleWrapper-jWHrLH iNSiTG byle byl__byle" data-ttid="ByleWrapper" emProp="thor" emType="><span emProp="name" class="ByleNamWrapper-jbHncj fuDQVo"><span data-ttid="ByleName" class="ByleName-kwmrLn cYaBaU byle__name"><span class="BaseWrap-sc-gjQpdd BaseText-ewhhUZ BylePreamble-iJolpQ iUEiRd bIbWCO gnILss byle__preamble">By </span>Lisa Robson</span></span></p></div></div></div></div></div></div></div><div class="SummaryCollectnGridToActnWrapper-gnReGN eGayfk"></div></div></div></div></div></div><div class="RowWrapper-UmqTg HEhan"><div class="TaboolaWrapper-hMVdpE iYfBhy"><div class="TaboolaWidgetWrapper-egPIjc hkSrgt TaboolaWidget-eUSdED hQCCRa" data-ttid="TaboolaWidgetWrapper"><div class="TaboolaWidgetContent-iBEQTO eXroXG TABOOLA" id="taboola-below-article-thumbnails" data-ttid="TaboolaWidgetContent"></div></div></div></div><div class="RowWrapper-UmqTg HEhan"><div class="AdWrapper-dQtivb fZrssQ ad ad--footer should-hold-space"><div class="ad__slot ad__slot--footer" data-no-id="lw45z"></div></div></div></div></div></ma><div class="BasePageMaFooterFiller-hTlZph jSriYf page__ma-footer-filler"></div><div class="RowWrapper-UmqTg HEhan"><div class="ConsumerMarketgUnThemedWrapper-iUTMTf jssHut nsumer-marketg-un nsumer-marketg-un--cm-footer" role="prentatn" aria-hidn="te"><div class="nsumer-marketg-un__slot nsumer-marketg-un__slot--cm-footer"></div><div class="journey-un"></div></div></div><div class="RowWrapper-UmqTg HEhan BasePageSeFooterRow-kpEBGH jqlJed"><div class="GridWrapper-cAzTTK eRggVV grid grid-margs grid-ems-0 BasePageSeFooterRowGrid-iBGjXL zQNeb"><div class="GridItem-buujkM kHPPIF grid--em"><footer class="SeFooterWrapper-bXjkRY bwIeHh se-footer--wh-store"><div class="SeFooterGridNoMargs-jSrXSj kdlxBX" data-ttid="SeFooterGridNoMargs"><div class="SeFooterBrandInfo-cdoqKy cdkwFG"><div class="SeFooterLogo-eYlNHY eigdAF se-footer__logo"><a href="/"><span class="SpanWrapper-umhxW jvZaPI rponsive-asset SeFooterLogoRponsiveAsset-ckjzWk kubVDn se-footer__rponsive-image"><picture class="RponsiveImagePicture-cWuUZO dUOtEa SeFooterLogoRponsiveAsset-ckjzWk kubVDn se-footer__rponsive-image rponsive-image"><img alt="Vany Fair" class="RponsiveImageContaer-eybHBd fptoWY rponsive-image__image" src="/verso/static/vany-fair/assets/" srcSet="" siz="100vw"/></picture></span></a></div><div 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