In KwaDuza, South Ai. 27-year-old Tshepo Modisane and Thoba Shole claim to have ma history beg the first gay men to be married a tradnal way, ral ceremony KwaZulu-Natal. MANDY DE WAAL speaks to the happy uple. In the town where one of Ai’s greatt warrrs and ary strategists was laid to rt, two urageo men are refg what tradnal masculy is all about. In KwaDuza (Stanger), where a memorial of Shaka kaSenzangakhona stands proud, Tshepo Modisane and Thoba Shole beme the first gay men the provce to celebrate their nuptials wh a tradnal, ral marriage on Saturday 6 April 2013, and ved the town to e and celebrate wh them. “This is the 21st century - society has changed and evolved. It is about time that gay rights are upheld and gay people are accepted, particularly by black people livg ral muni,” Tshepo told Daily Maverick on the phone om Durban. “We jt want to lead happy and productive liv. We are gay but we are still Ain, and we want to live our liv an Ain way followg our tradns and beliefs,” he their weddg, the pair was joed by fay and iends a tradnal ceremony that saw the doors of the Stanger Siva Sungam muny hall flung wi open to the lol muny, who turned up drov to celebrate the uple's unn. The ceremony clud the slghterg of a bull to ensure that the nuptials would be blsed terms of anctral tradns, and wnsed the exchange of ctomary gifts. “We cid on a tradnal weddg not only to keep le wh our ctoms and tradns, but we also wanted to show the people of this untry that, y - is possible to have a tradnal Ain gay weddg,” explas Modisane. “There is this ia that beg gay is an ‘unAin’ phenomenon, that homosegxwaly is somethg to be ashamed of - that is a Wtern thg. Thabo and I wanted to go agast this notn by showg South Ains that beg gay is ed Ain and is very much a part of the Ain culture. We wanted people to know that a gay unn n be accepted and celebrated by iends, fay and the broar muny,” he says. Modisane’s hband, Shole, says that ially the muny of KwaDuza expected to e to the weddg and to see two men draped weddg drs. “People n have strange notns about what means to be gay bee for the most part prejudice is based on ignorance. But when the people om KwaDuza arrived at our weddg they wnsed two very ordary men love, and they celebrated wh .” The weddg was aired on eNews and there’s a heart-warmg moment that shows the pair walkg to the ceremony drsed their rpective tradnal garb – Modisane his Tswana regalia and Shole drsed Zulu garb. As the two arrive and the crowd gets sight of them, the open ski fill wh the sound of ululatg and cheerg. Modisane picks up the story: “We had over 300 people who wnsed our weddg. The rponse was amazg bee people were so exced and lookg forward to the weddg. On the day people me out their numbers, which was so unbelievable,” he says excedly. The pair say that they were overwhelmed by the affectn and the joy displayed by the crowd. “It was a remarkable experience to be surround by so many people who were so acceptg and warm and lovg towards ,” says Shole. “For was important to normalise gay marriag the muny - for people to e and wns, and see that there’s nothg strange or sry about what we’re dog. That we’re jt two guys love.”Modisane and Shole first met Durban when they were both at universy. “We were jt iends then, but I had to e back to Johannburg and we lost ntact,” says Modisane. “Some time afterwards Thoba got a job Johannburg and started to work here on a full time basis 2011. We started out as gym partners and the relatnship grew – soon we were lovers and then knew we wanted to be each other’s partners. We got engaged June last year - that’s when we cid we wanted to get married.” Today the uple live together Johannburg where Modisane is an IT specialist and Shole an d manager at PwC. “Y, we uld have got married Johannburg, but was important for to be brave enough to have our weddg a ral area,” says Modisane, addg: “Bis, that’s where my partner was born, grew up and went to school. It is where he om.” The wedd uple will henceforth be known as Mr and Mr Shole-Modisane. source
Contents:
- VIO OF THE DAY: ZULU GAY WEDDG
- A GAY ZULU WEDDG AND THE DANGER OF A SGLE LGBTI AIN STORY
- EXCLIVE FROM “GAY ZULU WEDDG” WORLD FIRST GAY TRADNAL WEDDG
VIO OF THE DAY: ZULU GAY WEDDG
Marryg ancient tradn wh brave morny, a gay uple tied the knot a tradnal Zulu and Tswana weddg ceremony KwaDuza, South Ai. * gay zulu wedding *
While homosexual acts are illegal most Ain untri, South Ai, gay rights are protected and same-sex marriage is allowed unr the untry's progrsive post-apartheid, acrdg to GlobalPost Senr South Ai Corrponnt, Er Conway-Smh, gay marriage still isn't broadly accepted South Ai's largely nservative society.
Outsi of the big ci, gays and lbians ntue to face discrimatn and sometim btal Zuma, a 2006 speech KwaDuza - the same town where the Zulu gay marriage took place on Saturday - said that same-sex marriag were a "disgrace to the natn and to God.
""When I was growg up an ungqgili [a gay person] would not have stood ont of me.
A GAY ZULU WEDDG AND THE DANGER OF A SGLE LGBTI AIN STORY
Before the media clare the gay Zulu weddg as progrs for the LGBTI Ain movement, they mt ask themselv, "What do progrs for LGBTI people other Ain untri (or even for different groups of Ains wh South Ai) look like?" * gay zulu wedding *
"We cid to have a tradnal weddg bee we firstly wanted to show people that beg homosexual n be part of an Ain culture, " Thoba Shole, one of the men, told Durban's Daily om GlobalPost: The Rabow Stggle. In se you missed , a few weeks ago, two gay black South Ain men tied the knot at their 200-gut tradnal weddg, the first of s kd the old Zulu pal, Modisane and Thoba Shole, both proudly Zulu and Tswana, rpectively, cid to go public wh their gay Ain tradnal weddg ceremony by vg reporters to ver the ocsn. The vio report spread quickly across the Interwebs, cg a seri of media headl that scribe the unn as progrs for lbian, gay, bisexual, transgenr and tersex (LGBTI) Ains.
Lsons From Chimamanda Adichie: The Danger of a Sgle (Gay Ain Male) StoryChimamanda Adichie, a celebrated Nigerian wrer, said her famo TEDTalk, "The sgle story creat stereotyp, and the problem wh stereotyp is not that they are unte but that they are plete.
Neverthels, the untry's stggle to shift cultural attus toward acceptance of this margalized group of people, pecially ral areas and townships, this reason, as the media ntue to hail this sgle occurrence as a tone, be cril that supporters of the LGBTI Ain movement for equaly nsir that this sgle narrative exists wh the ntext of many stance, the vio report stat that the two gay black men are based the metropolan cy of Johannburg and are workg profsnals the fields of fancial servic and IT.
EXCLIVE FROM “GAY ZULU WEDDG” WORLD FIRST GAY TRADNAL WEDDG
m4m-ethnic-culture: “A Gay Zulu Weddg and the Danger of a Sgle LGBT Ain Story Male and Married: The Gay Zulu Weddg and the Danger of a Sgle LGBT Ain Story In se you missed , a few... * gay zulu wedding *
That's not to imply that they've been any way exempt om experiencg the bilatg impact of societal discrimatn -- far om ; the effects of homophobia (pound wh racism, as the uple is black) on the livelihoods of people prumed to be LGBTI n rult workplace discrimatn and prejudice health re, not to mentn prsn, anxiety and even, there's a huge difference between, on the one hand, the experience of beg a "regular-lookg" cisgenr male employee at a "Big Four" fancial nsultg firm a fairly liberal cy that boasts the largt gay pri para the untry and, on the other, the harsh realy of tryg to make ends meet a poor township while also fearg rape for beg a lbian, or murr for beg an effemate gay a piece wrten for a South Ain LGBTI publitn last year, wrers T. Tallie and Maria Hengeveld shared ments by Junr, a young, black, gay-intified male who disagreed wh South Ai's reputatn as a progrsive state (emphasis alics add by me):"When you have money, 's que easy to set yourself ee om discrimatn and danger, " Junr says. "Many of the whe gay and lbian people here n afford to ri a safe and progrsive area, but the majory of live townships.
" Junr's statement emphasiz that gay and lbian equaly South Ai is strongly mediated by race and class, and that sexual eedom is often available to those who have the racial and leral pal to afford light of the stggl of LGBTI Ains, the sire to celebrate any kd of progrs, pecially when the form of a gleeful Zulu weddg, is unrstandable; the vibrant ceremony prented a sharp ntrast to the media's grim (and at tim gome) pictn of vlent homophobia on the Ain ntent. However, is dangero to assign wi-sweepg gas to all LGBTI Ains based on the perceived victory of a of gay Ains who view marriage as the least of their problems: young people, for stance, who have been disowned by their fai and, above all, seek a stable alternative to homelsns?
What about transgenr women who experience rejectn (and vlence) om both gay and straight muni alike? G., gay men, or members of the middle class), while the groups most at risk (e.
South Ain rapper Big Zulu is trendg on social media after pictur of his alleged gay weddg went viral. * gay zulu wedding *
Funrs are maly terted gay men bee of that. And there is no rearch on Nigerian gay women to suggt otherwise, so we are at a disadvantage.