Over the last three days I’ve read Eve Th’s remarkable book, Gay and Catholic. Th, who is now her mid-30s, realized that she was “gay” middle school, admted to herself at age thirteen, and told her parents shortly thereafter. But while llege she began a different sort of love affair, a strong attractn to the Catholic Church. Whout graspg pletely at first, she accepted the moral requirement to be chaste. Ever sce
Contents:
- WHAT’S LIKE TO BE GAY AND CATHOLIC? AN TERVIEW WH EVE TH
- THE GAY CATHOLIC WRER WHO CHANGED MY LIFE
- GAY AND CATHOLIC
- A REVIEW OF GAY AND CATHOLIC BY EVE TH
- THE KG OF LOVE MY SHEPHERD IS: SOME THOUGHTS THAT ARE GAY AND ALSO HAPPY
- OPN IT’S HARD TO BE GAY AND CATHOLIC. IT DON’T HAVE TO BE.
- WHY BE GRATEFUL TO BE GAY?
- REPLACG PROBLEMS WH PERSONS: EVE TH’S NEW BOOK, GAY AND CATHOLIC
WHAT’S LIKE TO BE GAY AND CATHOLIC? AN TERVIEW WH EVE TH
"There is a future for dividual gay people the Catholic Church that don’t require reprsn, or self-hatred, or beg totally alone." * gay and catholic eve tushnet *
I wanted to wre a book which would clu some memoir ( orr to build tst, so people knew where I was g om), but which foced on the paths of love which are open to gay people the Church—pecially those paths which might be overlooked. I wrote Tenrns: A Gay Christian’s Gui to Unlearng Rejectn and Experiencg God’s Extravagant Love (forthg November om Ave Maria Prs) for gay Christians who found that their relatnship wh God had been damaged by paful experienc or misguid teachg they’d received their church.
You n thk of Gay and Catholic as a book about “horizontal love, ” the ways we love other people around , and Tenrns as a book about “vertil love, ” the love between the soul and God.
THE GAY CATHOLIC WRER WHO CHANGED MY LIFE
Eve Th is the thor of Gay and Catholic: Acceptg My Sexualy, Fdg Communy, Livg My Fah and Amends: A Novel. * gay and catholic eve tushnet *
I’ve known many people who were terrified of beg gay, believed they uld not possibly be gay, and, on the basis of that trmatized fear, entered heterosexual relatnships, cludg marriag. But the narrative that homosexualy mt be ed by abe, and n therefore be “fixed” by healg the wounds of trma, has self ed immense harm to people who had this narrative imposed on them when didn’t f their story.
GAY AND CATHOLIC
Reflectns on sex and beyond om a gay, nservative Catholic. * gay and catholic eve tushnet *
So many people who grew up gay our church spent their formative years terrified and hidg, fearg that their attractns meant they uld never love God, that they disappoted Him, and that there was no future for them the Church, or only a future of isolatn and reprsn. Gay people are redisverg the Scriptural and historil mols wh a special urgency, bee we had never been told that there were Christian mols for the same-sex love we longed for. Not every gay person is lled to the paths (jt as not every straight person is lled to marriage), but, my experience, knowg that there is orred same-sex love n change people’s relatnship to Scripture and Church teachg.
A REVIEW OF GAY AND CATHOLIC BY EVE TH
One of the thgs I've been sayg a lot over the past year or so is that if you're gay and Catholic (or another Christian church wh a * gay and catholic eve tushnet *
I thk I’ve really stated above—I believe that same-sex love n be betiful and holy; that sex is not the right exprsn of this love (sce sex is rerved for the unn of a man and a woman marriage), but n be exprsed many good ways; and that gay people need, as the techism says, “rpect, passn, and sensivy, ” which too many of have not received om our fellow Catholics.
THE KG OF LOVE MY SHEPHERD IS: SOME THOUGHTS THAT ARE GAY AND ALSO HAPPY
The Patheos Book Club featur Gay and Catholic: Acceptg My Sexualy, Fdg Communy, Livg My Fah by Eve Th, the first book om an openly lbian and celibate Catholic about her spirual and tellectual journey om liberal atheism to fahful Catholicism. * gay and catholic eve tushnet *
When church teach that beg gay is a choice, that’s harmful self and also may lead parents to throw their gay children out of the hoe for “disobedience, ” ntributg to the horrific number of homels LGBT teenagers. I thk the fn of “nversn therapy” that mak the most sense is that ’s therapy where one of the primary purpos is to rce homosexualy and crease heterosexualy: a therapy which “succs” n be measured by gree of heterosexualy.
I have iends who are gay and practicg Catholics who found the book spirg and helpful, and several of the prayer exercis the send half are really good—I quote one of them Tenrns. The posn you strike your article seems to agree wh those who hope to ban any type of therapy that helps persons unrstand their homosexual clatn or that attribut any environmental fluence such as trma or abe. Revoice is an ecumenil Christian nference; En Invatn is a Catholic group; and I’m volved wh the gay and lbian mistry at my church, which do a pretty good job at tryg to grow fahfulns, while welg people no matter what they believe.
OPN IT’S HARD TO BE GAY AND CATHOLIC. IT DON’T HAVE TO BE.
Eve Th is the thor of Gay and Catholic: Acceptg My Sexualy, Fdg Communy, Livg My Fah (wner of the 2015 Catholic Prs Award for * gay and catholic eve tushnet *
I have iends who lost jobs or mistry posns bee they me out, or were outed by others—the are people who accepted their church’s teachg on sexual ethics, and sought to live by , but simply beg gay ma them “unf to serve. The homophobia I’ve experienced Catholic settgs has mostly manifted as spicn and unwillgns to listen: assumptns about my fay background (for example, speculatg on how my parents mt have ed my lbianism), sex life, or spirual life; repeated terrogatns about whether I “really” believe what I say I believe; and spicn of anythg I do to love eher another woman, or gay muni. I n’t tell you how many tim I’ve seen someone post a eply personal, heartfelt discsn of the spirual stggl they’ve experienced seekg to be fahful to Christ while growg self-acceptance and unlearng self-hatred… only to have somebody pop up the ments to rm them that beg gay is a s.
In general, if you’re discsg the Catholic sexual ethic wh a gay person (or anybody, probably), ’s good to ask yourself what you have done to make yourself tstworthy this person’s ey. There are a few good books on personal experienc of beg gay and Christian, wrten a way that’s fahful to historil Christian teachg on sexualy, but there wasn’t anythg that was foced on the different paths that one’s life uld take. The primary target dience is actual gay Christians who are tryg to figure out what their liv are gog to look like, and then anyone who wants to make the church more welg for gay and lbian you suggt ways for church to be more welg?
And then the sendary thg would be that the troubl you experience are gog to pend somewhat on your cultural ntext, but they’re not gog to be totally alien for Catholics and is possible to build solidary both wh other gay Christians and wh the straight people who are the majory. “There is no one who wr about the particular gifts and challeng of beg gay and Christian wh more prophetic sight, godly wisdom, humane sensivy, and sheer good humor than Eve Th.
WHY BE GRATEFUL TO BE GAY?
Eve Th is the award-wng thor of Gay & Catholic Eve jt released Tenrns: A Gay Christian's Gui to Unlearng Rejectn and Experiencg God's Extravagant Love, has wrten two novels, is the edor of the anthology Christ’s Body, Christ’s Wounds, and has ntributed to several books, cludg Sex and the Spirual Life.
REPLACG PROBLEMS WH PERSONS: EVE TH’S NEW BOOK, GAY AND CATHOLIC
Th has wrten on the paths of love available to gay Christians for a wi range of publitns, cludg Ameri, Amerin Conservative, Commonweal, and Christiany Today, and onle for Atlantic, New York Tim, and Washgton Post. Eventually I wrote to Th, tellg her I hoped she’d wre a book someday, llectg and distillg her posts to a format I uld easily hand to my fellow gay Christians, not to my mentn my fay members, (straight) iends, pastors, and prits. At s heart this book, Gay and Catholic: Acceptg My Sexualy, Fdg Communy, Livg My Fah, is an extend effort to assure gay and lbian people that enterg the church will not mean the supprsn of their longgs and lov.
Followg several chapters that narrate her upbrgg, cludg her g out at age 13, her days as a stunt activist, and her eventual nversn to Catholicism while an unrgraduate at Yale, Th simply exam several possible ways that gay Catholics may give and receive love while remag fahful to tradnal Christian sexual ethics. Tenrns: A Gay Christian's Gui to Unlearng Rejectn and Experiencg God's Extravagant LoveWhat would happen if gay Christians began to believe the tth about God—that he lov all people unndnally?
The book also offers guidance on livg through or reverg om the paful experienc that are all too mon gay Christian life—om faial rejectn and weaponized Christiany to ambivalence and doubt.