I owe my happs to the queer iends I ma. And to my younger self who hated beg gay: all is fiven, says i newspaper lumnist Eleanor Margolis
Contents:
- ‘I FELL LOVE WH A GAY MAN AND NEARLY BROKE ME’
- ‘HE BROKE MY HEART TO A BILLN PIEC’: WHEN A STRAIGHT WOMAN FALLS LOVE WH A GAY MAN
- WHAT I LEARNED ABOUT MYSELF AFTER YEARS OF FALLG FOR GAY MEN
- IT TOOK ME A LONG TIME, BUT I’VE FALLY FALLEN LOVE WH BEG GAY
‘I FELL LOVE WH A GAY MAN AND NEARLY BROKE ME’
Fallg love wh a straight guy n be a paful experience, pecially for gay men who yearn for a romantic nnectn wh someone who is not terted them romantilly. And as a Gay Datg & Relatnship Coach, I’ve worked wh many clients who have experienced the pa of fallg for straight guys. The pa of unrequed love n be overwhelmg, and ’s a feelg that many gay men n relate to.
Is bee you’re not ready to e out, or bee you’re aaid of beg rejected by someone who is gay?
‘HE BROKE MY HEART TO A BILLN PIEC’: WHEN A STRAIGHT WOMAN FALLS LOVE WH A GAY MAN
Once you’ve intified your patterns, start askg yourself why you’re not allowg yourself to fall for gay guys. Is a fear of rejectn, or a fear of beg seen as too gay? While fallg for straight guys n be a paful experience, some gay men might feel like there are benefs to as well.
For example, if you’re fallg love wh a straight guy, means you don’t have to put yourself out there and risk rejectn om someone who is gay. As a Gay Datg & Relatnship Coach, I’ve worked wh many clients who have experienced the pa of fallg for straight guys.
Many gay men who have fallen for straight guys might wonr if ’s possible for a straight guy to fall love wh a guy.
WHAT I LEARNED ABOUT MYSELF AFTER YEARS OF FALLG FOR GAY MEN
While some people might intify as gay, straight, or bisexual, there are also people who fall somewhere between or who don’t intify wh any particular label. Homophobia, transphobia, and other forms of bigotry are still prevalent many parts of the world, and n make difficult for people to be their thentic selv. I uldn’t say was bee he was gay, ” said the 46-year-old.
Davidson, om Sydney, Atralia, says she’s not the first straight woman to fall for a gay man. People ask, uldn’t we tell we were fallg love wh a gay man? ” But both refer to the same thg — straight women who have strong, often highly tense and mutually supportive relatnships wh gay men.
The days, straight women and gay men who get along would probably jt be lled iends, but “handbags” were often vol and visual supporters of the LGBTQ muny when discrimatn — legal and otherwise — was still rampant. “So many women have acted as protectors, cheerlears, and supporters of their gay iends, but always the background, ” Davidson says. “Straight alli, and particularly women, are a val part of the fight for gay rights.
IT TOOK ME A LONG TIME, BUT I’VE FALLY FALLEN LOVE WH BEG GAY
” Her grandmother was a “beard, ” or fake girliend, to gay men she was close to, while her mother helped when the muny was beg vastated by AIDS. “I’d been raised a fay wh lots of gay men , so I should have known better than anyone (not to fall love wh one), ” Davidson says.
“A gay man wasn’t a shy unirn I’d never seen before. “I know a woman who was a relatnship for 17 years before he me out as gay.
Most of the time, a gay bt iend might be obliv if his female iend has fallen for him. But some gay men actually enurage , she says. “The wonrful thg about gay men is they talk to me like I’m a person bee they don’t want to get your pants.