Gay Men and Straight Men as Friends | Psychology Today

Contents:

• WHY ARE ALL MY FRIENDS GAY?
• CLOSE-READG THE RENS WH PHOEBE MALTZ BOVY SUBSCRIBESIGN {"@NTEXT":","@TYPE":"NEWSARTICLE","URL":","MAENTYOFPAGE":","HEADLE":"\"ALL MY IENDS ARE GAY ALL MY FRIENDS ARE GAY\" - EDA MONSOON","SCRIPTN":"OF D CHARACTERS AND CUCUMBERS","IMAGE":[],"DATEPUBLISHED":"2021-07-08T00:01:28+00:00","DATEMODIFIED":"2021-07-08T00:01:28+00:00","ISACCSIBLEFORFREE":TE,"THOR":[{"@TYPE":"PERSON","NAME":"PHOEBE MALTZ BOVY","URL":","SCRIPTN":"ANOTHER 2004-ERA BLOGGER GIVG A GO","INTIFIER":"ER:6230636","SAMEAS":["],"IMAGE":{"@TYPE":"IMAGEOBJECT","NTENTURL":","THUMBNAILURL":"}}],"PUBLISHER":{"@TYPE":"ORGANIZATN","NAME":"CLOSE-READG THE RENS WH PHOEBE MALTZ BOVY ","URL":","SCRIPTN":"ALL THE CLOTH, TERRS, AND CULTURAL POLICS OF TV SHOWS VERY MUCH NOT OF THE MOMENT.","TERACTNSTATISTIC":{"@TYPE":"INTERACTNCOUNTER","NAME":"SUBSCRIBERS","TERACTNTYPE":","ERINTERACTNCOUNT":1000},"INTIFIER":"PUB:223471","SAMEAS":["]}}SHARE THIS POST"ALL MY IENDS ARE GAY ALL MY FRIENDS ARE GAY" - EDA COPY LKFACEBOOKEMAILNOTOTHER"ALL MY IENDS ARE GAY ALL MY FRIENDS ARE GAY" - EDA MONSOON
• HOW TO DEAL WHEN YOUR BT FRIEND IS GAY
• HOW TO TELL IF YOUR GUY FRIEND IS GAY
• WHY ALL MY IENDS ARE GAY?
• SCIENTISTS MAY HAVE FALLY UNLOCKED PUZZLE OF WHY PEOPLE ARE GAY
• GAY MEN AND STRAIGHT MEN AS FRIENDS
• CAN GAY AND STRAIGHT MEN REALLY BE FRIENDS?
• ALL MY FRIENDS ARE GAY WALL ART
• I THOUGHT I DIDN'T NEED GAY FRIENDS; I WAS WRONG
• I’M 35 AND MY BT IEND IS 64. HERE’S WHY OUR AGE DIFFERENCE AS GAY MEN IS A GIFT
• HOW TO HAVE A GAY FRIEND
• WHEN YOUR CHILD HAS A GAY IEND
• ALL MY FRIENDS ARE GAY MASK
• HOW TO MAKE GAY FRIENDS
• ALL MY FRIENDS ARE GAY GREETG CARDS
• AM I GAY?
• IS MY HBAND GAY? SIGNS OF A GAY HBAND
• I’M THAT GAY GUY WH ALL FEMALE IENDS

WHY ARE ALL MY FRIENDS GAY?

›There the pot where everyone has to take a hard look at their iends, take a ep breath, and ask the words as rhetorilly as possible; Why are all my iends gay? It's the people who are aaid of beg associated wh a gay or are still tryg to figure out their sexualy, that react don't mean that there is anythg wrong wh not knowg what tegory you fall to, jt means you uld be a ltle unfortable while hangg out wh my hontly, don't we all have the iend that would kiss for a joke?

Whenever female heterosexualy is picted wh any gree of realism-of-spir, and om a female perspective, the theory has to be raised: did a gay man wre this? The show’s creator, Darren Star, is a gay man, a fact om which was extrapolated at the time meant the entire show was not really about women, bee women are not like that.

CLOSE-READG THE RENS WH PHOEBE MALTZ BOVY SUBSCRIBESIGN {"@NTEXT":","@TYPE":"NEWSARTICLE","URL":","MAENTYOFPAGE":","HEADLE":"\"ALL MY IENDS ARE GAY ALL MY FRIENDS ARE GAY\" - EDA MONSOON","SCRIPTN":"OF D CHARACTERS AND CUCUMBERS","IMAGE":[],"DATEPUBLISHED":"2021-07-08T00:01:28+00:00","DATEMODIFIED":"2021-07-08T00:01:28+00:00","ISACCSIBLEFORFREE":TE,"THOR":[{"@TYPE":"PERSON","NAME":"PHOEBE MALTZ BOVY","URL":","SCRIPTN":"ANOTHER 2004-ERA BLOGGER GIVG A GO","INTIFIER":"ER:6230636","SAMEAS":["],"IMAGE":{"@TYPE":"IMAGEOBJECT","NTENTURL":","THUMBNAILURL":"}}],"PUBLISHER":{"@TYPE":"ORGANIZATN","NAME":"CLOSE-READG THE RENS WH PHOEBE MALTZ BOVY ","URL":","SCRIPTN":"ALL THE CLOTH, TERRS, AND CULTURAL POLICS OF TV SHOWS VERY MUCH NOT OF THE MOMENT.","TERACTNSTATISTIC":{"@TYPE":"INTERACTNCOUNTER","NAME":"SUBSCRIBERS","TERACTNTYPE":","ERINTERACTNCOUNT":1000},"INTIFIER":"PUB:223471","SAMEAS":["]}}SHARE THIS POST"ALL MY IENDS ARE GAY ALL MY FRIENDS ARE GAY" - EDA COPY LKFACEBOOKEMAILNOTOTHER"ALL MY IENDS ARE GAY ALL MY FRIENDS ARE GAY" - EDA MONSOON

) Lten, is a gay man, I had this thought of, yeah, OK, this adds up, this is why somethg about the show’s sensibily, even when seems to be about hetero fay drama, is… yeah. ) Gay men, for obv reasons, do not appear to have the same ght relatnship wh betiful women, as a le, so betiful women n simply be left out of the equatn.

HOW TO DEAL WHEN YOUR BT FRIEND IS GAY

" If you want to talk about your iend to a parent or guardian, try askg "Would you be okay wh me mentng that you're gay to my parents if me up, or would you prefer that I keep quiet? Article SummaryXIt might e as a b of a shock to fd out your bt iend is gay, but by supportg them and givg yourself time to get ed to , your iendship n be jt like was. For example, his fay may be vlently homophobic and by cidg that he's gay, you may out him by accint by treatg him different or implyg somethg whout meang to.

If you're tryg to figure out if your iend is gay bee you want to date him (as a woman), 's important to remember that jt bee he might be terted men don't mean he's not terted women. Although some people the gay culture may put on a certa voice or a way of speakg, your iend talkg a siar or "effemate" way is still not a very good way to judge.

HOW TO TELL IF YOUR GUY FRIEND IS GAY

Everyone n enjoy different thgs; jt like a woman might enjoy watchg football, guys n also enjoy thgs that are more monly associated wh women or the gay muny. Say somethg like, "You know you're stuck wh me as a iend no matter what, but I jt have to ask bee I don't want to make assumptns and e to the wrong nclns: are you gay? A group of scientists suggted Tuday that homosexuals get that tra om their oppose-sex parents: A lbian will almost always get the tra om her father, while a gay man will get the tra om his heredary lk of homosexualy has long been tablished, but scientists knew was not a strictly geic lk, bee there are many pairs of intil tws who have differg sexuali.

Scientists om the Natnal Instute for Mathematil and Blogil Synthis say homosexualy seems to have an epigeic, not a geic thought to have some sort of heredary lk, a group of scientists suggted Tuday that homosexualy is lked to epi-marks — extra layers of rmatn that ntrol how certa gen are exprsed. In homosexuals, the epi-marks aren't erased — they're passed om father-to-dghter or mother-to-son, explas William Rice, an evolutnary blogist at the Universy of California Santa Barbara and lead thor of the study.

"There is pellg evince that epi-marks ntribute to both the siary and dissiary of fay members, and n therefore feasibly ntribute to the observed faial herance of homosexualy and s low nrdance between [intil] tws, " Rice and his team created a mathematil mol that explas why homosexualy is passed through epi-marks, not geics. Evolutnarily speakg, if homosexualy was solely a geic tra, scientists would expect the tra to eventually disappear bee homosexuals wouldn't be expected to reproduce. But bee the epi-marks provi an evolutnary advantage for the parents of homosexuals: They protect fathers of homosexuals om unrexposure to ttosterone and mothers of homosexuals om overexposure to ttosterone while they are gtatn.

WHY ALL MY IENDS ARE GAY?

"The epi-marks protect fathers and mothers om excs or unrexposure to ttosterone — when they rry over to oppose-sex offsprg, n e the masculizatn of femal or the femizatn of mal, " Rice says, which n lead to a child beg gay.

SCIENTISTS MAY HAVE FALLY UNLOCKED PUZZLE OF WHY PEOPLE ARE GAY

Rice not that the markers are "highly variable" and that only strong epi-marks will rult a homosexual scientists have long spected some sort of geic lk, Rice says studi attemptg to expla why people are gay have been few and far between. " Homosexual behavr has been observed black swans, pengus, sheep, and other animals, he 's mol still needs to be tted on real-life parent-offsprg pairs, but he says this epigeic lk mak more sense than any other explanatn, and that his team has mapped out a way for other scientists to tt their work. Sex the Cy, Will and Grace), though a lot ls has been said about how gay and straight men regnize and negotiate the distct challeng, plitns, and rewards of their iendships.

S., before there was such a thg as a gay inty, some straight men would, wh ltle shame, engage sexual ntact wh other men (ually allowg themselv to be fellated) when female partners were otherwise unavailable (see Gee Chncey’s semal book, Gay New York: Genr, Urban Culture, and the Makg of the Gay Male World 1890-1940) and there is good reason to believe this still occurs other untri and cultur. Gay men have suffered physil, social, and psychologil abe at the hands of heterosexually intified mal who, thanks to homophobia and heterosexism, felt fully jtified flictg the terrors. This legacy of vlence, both physil and psychologil, flicted by straight men toward those of who are gay naturally fuels our utn and distst at the thought of beiendg them.

GAY MEN AND STRAIGHT MEN AS FRIENDS

McKellan is a gay man who me out 1988, and although 33 years have passed sce he me out, n still be shockg to the world to see such a close same-sex iendship that cross sexual inti. Siar to qutns that loom about whether straight men and women n ever tly be platonic iends, the same qutn lgers over the iendships between gay and straight men.

McKie’s rearch reported that straight participants felt that a gay iend ma for the ultimate wgman bee the gay iend uld help to attract prospective partners for the straight iend.

CAN GAY AND STRAIGHT MEN REALLY BE FRIENDS?

However, straight men bromosexual iendships have perhaps learned how to harns this ease of iendship between straight women and gay men for their own advantage. McKie noted that the straight men felt their gay iend was able to make succsful troductns to straight women bee the women tsted their gay male iends to troduce them to a good person.

The lack of petn for the same prospective partners allows the iendship to flourish a way that may be hred to some gree for gay or straight men iendships wh men who share the same sexual orientatn.

ALL MY FRIENDS ARE GAY WALL ART

Straight men also reported havg more emotnally vulnerable nversatns wh their gay iends bee they felt safer to do so, relative to attemptg to discs siar topics wh other straight men. McKie’s rearch found that straight men livg the more central parts of Canada and the Uned Stat were ls likely to report a willgns or tert havg a gay man as a iend.

I THOUGHT I DIDN'T NEED GAY FRIENDS; I WAS WRONG

Tags: we are all equal, equaly, same rights, lgbt, gay, lbian, pri, bisexual, lgbtq, rabow, queer, femism, femist, funny, transgenr, tumblr, bi, love, cute, lgbtqia, twter, ace, asexual, blm, lorful, flag, fun, meme, mic, pansexual, pk, quot, sexualy, trans, woman, women, abstract, activist, athetic, betiful, black liv matter, bubble speech, ts, ol, equal, female. ) On top of that, take to acunt the hurdl of gay culture: beg the closet, g out, homophobia, ternalized homophobia, and velopg ep, unrequed csh on straight acquatanc om high school you barely spoke to, cludg that guy who was two years olr than you wh the dirty brown hair and always wore tank tops durg the summer and uld have moled and now is probably married wh three kids and I’m pretty sure his name was Ian. Somewhere along this super gay marathon (and I’m reag om sertg a pole metaphor here, send ngratulatns at your nvenience), you slowly accumulate some like-md iends beyond the people you’re hookg up wh or datg, and beg to realize there are ed others who have wad through the same torrent of emotns and experienc you’ve enuntered.

Prevly feelg like the sole gay the universe, like Sigourney Weaver walkg the halls of Nostromo at the end of Alien soaked sweat, you’ve fally found other telligent queer life. ), your gay iends are there to get dnk wh on a Saturday night, followed by group msagg each other on Sunday morng that GIF of Kim Kardashian slidg unr bedvers.

I’M 35 AND MY BT IEND IS 64. HERE’S WHY OUR AGE DIFFERENCE AS GAY MEN IS A GIFT

A member of your gay iend group will also happily be there to take a picture of you for your Instagram, and will be jt as happy to take the same picture 30 more tim wh only slightly different angl bee turns out ’s you who’s the importance of cultivatg gay iendships went over my head durg my personal evolutn, as I ially unrstood my own sexualy as much as I unrstood 11th gra math. And like tryg to figure out the Pythagorean Theorem g a toaster oven stead of a lculator, navigatg my own queerns early on whout gay iends was a mostly futile effort.

HOW TO HAVE A GAY FRIEND

Asi om beg patient Instagram picture-takers and knowg where the bt parti are, gay iends provid a major key to further unlockg my ner-most tth and the legacy behd . Though me n make more than, please lift those watered-down vodka sodas wh those brown, brown, wiltg lim higher to the air and make a toast to the gay iends your life.

I was ved by some new acquatanc to stay at his beach hoe Fire Island P, a sandbar off the ast of Long Island that sce the 1950s has been a storied enclave for the LGBTQ muny of Gay Gotham. I asked Gil about this and he said there are numero benefs to beg iends wh younger gays like me — for starters, we keep him on top of all the ways the world has changed when to technology and social teractn.

We’ve had parents who’ve obvly had nversatns ont of their kids, sayg thgs like, “Well, he’s gay, he don’t know yet, ” and jt thgs like actually aren’t posive or aren’t helpful. Buy any 3 and get 20% any 10 and get 30% any 50 and get 35% all my iends are gay All My Friends Are Gay Greetg CardBy Guy MohrTags: lgbt, lgbtqia, trans, transiendly, transgenr, gay iends, trans iends, queer All My Friends Are Trans (and they're also gay) Greetg CardBy TheCatboyCoOpTags: lgbt, lgbtqia, trans iends, trans, trans iendly, trans rights, gay rights, trans liberatn, gay iends All My Friends Are Trans (and they're also gay) Greetg CardBy TheAngharadTags: gay, lgbt, lbian, lgbtq, trans, gay pri, gay pri flag, gay pri para, gay dosr, brontoss, beg gay All my iends are gay Greetg CardBy NickiPostTags: gay, iend, banana, vtage, ad, boy, lgbt, queer, blue, humor, retro, nostalgia, drag, queen, hag, size, all, u, 40s, 50s, forti, fifti, grocery, pri, rabow, para, ftival, proud, agenda, top, bottom All my FRIENDS are GAY!

WHEN YOUR CHILD HAS A GAY IEND

Greetg CardBy ChadwikTags: token straight iend, ally, lgbtq ally, lgbt, iend of the gays, queer, allyship, liberal, all my iends are gay, gay adjacent Token Straight Friend Greetg CardBy ElvenGoldTags: t, kten, cute, lgbt, rabow, gay, lbian, bi, pri, muny, kawaii, words, funny, relatable, nroillogic All my iends are GAAAAAAY Greetg CardBy nroillogicTags: token straight iend, ally, lgbtq ally, lgbt, iend of the gays, queer, allyship, liberal, all my iends are gay, gay adjacent Certified Friend of the Gays Greetg CardBy ElvenGoldTags: year and men at grab women fn, humoro farmer n here nephew dad granddghter, play unique bt a that surprise th, f all law our their my parents, are niece by choir father om wear, hband lgbt your old momhband his some, people iend any nt ia new or, of great retirement anytime be on am, toddlers fiance son big ee have, boys brother if thanksgivg holidays pri get, show lovers animals he grandma guncle, jt sweetheart ocsn her an dghter wh, love mommy teens fun yours is unirn, holiday part july other you know happy, farmg rabow girls anyone this youth, to mak sign round me boy iend i, the who graduatn like children him as, want uncle gay for gamer iends fan, fans boyiend christmas perfect mom retro, im celebratn sister bday ol every party, fay fiancee do st patrick will awome humor, funny birth sayg classic vatns mama weddg Guncle Defn Rabow Funny Gift for Gay Uncle Greetg CardBy shoemidubbse1Statnery & OfficeGreetg CardAll My Friends Are GayWhy settle for the same old greetg rds? And somewhere on Redbubble, there’s a All My Friends Are Gay greetg rd that’s unique the perfect way for you both, created and sold by an pennt artist who shar your quirks.

Adam* said was dangero to e out as gay his home untry and feared beg forced to an arranged marriage wh a woman.He said he was "so lucky" to wed his soulmate, Ray, Manchter and wish everyone uld marry who they love.

There are more than 60 untri wh laws that crimalise same-sex sexual acts acrdg to the Internatnal Lbian, Gay, Bisexual, Trans and Intersex Associatn, cludg Sdi Arabia.'Authentilly myself'Ray said he had also stggled growg up gay the 1970s and 80s England, which was "tough".He said his relig school "dmmed to you, 'you are gog to hell'".When Adam returned home to Sdi Arabia, spe beg more than 3,000 apart and later rtricted by the Covid-19 panmic, they kept touch daily and the romance blossomed.Three years ago, Ray proposed on a vio ll and after succsfully applyg for a UK fiancé visa, Adam moved to Manchter December 2022. Adam said he had been aaid to even wear lours his home untry so the first thg he did when he moved was start to "grow my mullet, got my ears pierced and booked appotments for tattoos".He relled how, ntrast, one of his gay iends Sdi had been forced to marry a woman, addg: "It has ed not only his life but the life of his wife."Danny Beard on Same Sex Love and MarriageDanny explor same-sex weddgs, fdg out why upl chose to get married, the challeng unrpng this cisn and what mak the wedd relatnships work.The uple said they now wanted to help people who were not as ee and strive for "equaly for everyone"."Now I'm here a safe place I want to fight for others to be able to marry who they want," Adam said."I'm so lucky but I want everyone else Sdi to marry the one they love whout facg discrimatn and persecutn." Image source, Fay photographImage ptn, Peter McGrah and David Cabreza say they are "very proud" to have been the first same-sex uple married EnglandMore than 40,000 same-sex marriag took place between 2014 and 2020, acrdg to the Office for Natnal StatisticsPeter McGrah and David Cabreza, origally om Stland and the US, ma history when they beme the first same-sex uple to marry England on 29 March 2014.The trailblazers married jt after midnight at Islgton Town Hall. The uple, who live London, said a "really betiful memory" was on the way home when one of their sons shouted out of the black b wdow to Trafalgar Square, "My dads jt got married" and cheered "Yay, gay marriage"."It was so sweet seeg him so happy," Mr Cabreza said.

ALL MY FRIENDS ARE GAY MASK

We currently have a survey vtigatn unrway that explor some of the posive out of “bromosexual” iendships, cludg our theory that gay men and straight men n be optimal wg men for one another. At the same time, many straight men still doubt that they’ll be able to relate to gay men any meangful way and, for this reason, may not try to iate a iendship.

HOW TO MAKE GAY FRIENDS

Gay men who disclose their sexual orientatn to their straight male iends earlier life may be able to build more open and hont iendships wh them to adulthood. Send, recent rearch has argued that genr and sexual orientatn might not be as black and whe as prevly thought, which opens up new avenu for explorg how gay and straight men n relate to one another. If a straight guy and his gay male iend are ls rigid about their masculy and sexualy, they’ll probably be more likely to discs tails about their sexual and romantic liv openly wh one another.

In short, women are able to tst the datg advice om gay male iends bee they know their gay iends don’t have any ulterr motiv: They’re not tryg to hook up wh them or pete wh them for guys.

ALL MY FRIENDS ARE GAY GREETG CARDS

Jt as a gay man might be able to pass on advice about women to his straight iend, a straight man uld nnect his gay male iend wh another sirable gay man, sce neher the gay man nor his straight iend are petg for the same person.

AM I GAY?

We believe that havg a tstworthy nfidant to help wh romantic pursus is one of the major reasons straight and gay men are leavg the fort of their same-sex, same-orientatn iend groups to form “bromosexual” iendships. Gay - While this adjective has historilly scribed men who are attracted to other men, the term now is ed to refer to anyone who experienc romantic, emotnal, or physil attractn to people of the same genr. Sometim a woman may have been a heterosexual relatnship for years and yet feel somethg is somehow "off;" and she may fd herself askg, "Is my hband gay?

IS MY HBAND GAY? SIGNS OF A GAY HBAND

" Many women fd this qutn unthkable but acrdg to Bonnie Kaye,, an expert women married to gay men, is timated that 4 ln women have been, or are, married to gay men. There’s some evolutnary explanatn for this: Bee gay men and straight women are not petg for the same mat, and this may be why they excel at dispensg datg advice when I scurry to the bathroom, mid-Tr date, need of a send opn. Unfortunately, though, our teacher scrapped the project last-mute, believg that the ncept was too ak to a romantic realy after our article was nned, my search for a male bt iend — and my ternalized homophobia — prsed on.

This is why sayg you have a iend one particular mographic don't exce racism, homophobia, or other prejudice; you n't have a pre-judgement about someone you already know, but you n still mata your pre-judgement agast people you haven't met.

I’M THAT GAY GUY WH ALL FEMALE IENDS

Adam* said was dangero to e out as gay his home untry and feared beg forced to an arranged marriage wh a said he was "so lucky" to wed his soulmate, Ray, Manchter and wish everyone uld marry who they love. There are more than 60 untri wh laws that crimalise same-sex sexual acts acrdg to the Internatnal Lbian, Gay, Bisexual, Trans and Intersex Associatn, cludg Sdi Arabia. 'Authentilly myself'Ray said he had also stggled growg up gay the 1970s and 80s England, which was "tough" said his relig school "dmmed to you, 'you are gog to hell'" Adam returned home to Sdi Arabia, spe beg more than 3, 000 apart and later rtricted by the Covid-19 panmic, they kept touch daily and the romance years ago, Ray proposed on a vio ll and after succsfully applyg for a UK fiancé visa, Adam moved to Manchter December 2022.

Adam said he had been aaid to even wear lours his home untry so the first thg he did when he moved was start to "grow my mullet, got my ears pierced and booked appotments for tattoos" relled how, ntrast, one of his gay iends Sdi had been forced to marry a woman, addg: "It has ed not only his life but the life of his wife. The uple, who live London, said a "really betiful memory" was on the way home when one of their sons shouted out of the black b wdow to Trafalgar Square, "My dads jt got married" and cheered "Yay, gay marriage".

This week on Gay & Delnal we explore what means to be your most thentic self, and y bab, we get to the nty-grty and I share my g out story wh you all. We are talkg about the ever-elive ncept of iend-makg, what means, how works wh the gays, how I have personally found myself iendships, and even a Grdr horror story, bee you serve . This episo particular I am really proud of, not necsarily for qualy, however, I do believe that this is more the route that I want to take wh Gay & Delnal.