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A gay man falls love wh his bt female iend and wonrs what means for his inty." emprop="scriptn

Contents:

I WAS SURE I WAS GAY – UNTIL I FELL LOVE WH MY BT FEMALE IEND

Sam Wilkson me out as gay at 18 years old, then realised he was pansexual after fallg love wh his female bt iend. * i am gay but in love with a girl *

Adam* said was dangero to e out as gay his home untry and feared beg forced to an arranged marriage wh a said he was "so lucky" to wed his soulmate, Ray, Manchter and wish everyone uld marry who they love. There are more than 60 untri wh laws that crimalise same-sex sexual acts acrdg to the Internatnal Lbian, Gay, Bisexual, Trans and Intersex Associatn, cludg Sdi Arabia. 'Authentilly myself'Ray said he had also stggled growg up gay the 1970s and 80s England, which was "tough" said his relig school "dmmed to you, 'you are gog to hell'" Adam returned home to Sdi Arabia, spe beg more than 3, 000 apart and later rtricted by the Covid-19 panmic, they kept touch daily and the romance years ago, Ray proposed on a vio ll and after succsfully applyg for a UK fiancé visa, Adam moved to Manchter December 2022.

Adam said he had been aaid to even wear lours his home untry so the first thg he did when he moved was start to "grow my mullet, got my ears pierced and booked appotments for tattoos" relled how, ntrast, one of his gay iends Sdi had been forced to marry a woman, addg: "It has ed not only his life but the life of his wife. The uple, who live London, said a "really betiful memory" was on the way home when one of their sons shouted out of the black b wdow to Trafalgar Square, "My dads jt got married" and cheered "Yay, gay marriage".

Those lov are like fallg love wh a teacher, or a straight fallg love wh a gay, or fallg love wh a married person, or fallg love wh a sger or an actor. But you need to know that if the person dont want to do somethg wh you, you need to pass no matter have to rpect that the person you like is straight jt like how he rpect and accept you beg Gay.

I AM GAY AND I'M LOVE WH A STRAIGHT, WHAT N I DO?

The show "My Hband’s Not Gay” has ed an uproar. * i am gay but in love with a girl *

Fally, the relatnships suggt to some people “reparative therapy, ” the uhil and impossible claim that a person n be changed om gay to straight. You might be able to claim your inty by meetg ocsnally wh gay men, stayg touch on Facebook, and lettg your gay iends know that you want to rema sexually fahful to your wife. I warn mixed-orientatn upl that he may feel differently later life and his gayns may surface more strongly and bee more of an inty for him and th bee an issue their marriage.

STRAIGHT WOMEN AND THEIR GAY HBANDS

Straight women get om gay men what they don't get om straight men. * i am gay but in love with a girl *

Both straight and gay muni put enormo prsure on the man and woman a mixed-orientatn marriage, and few marriag n stand up unr this social, fay, and relig prsure. A gay man n tly love a woman, have satisfyg and regular sex wh her, and want to stay married to her while beg unterted other women sexually. Matag a mixed-orientatn marriage requir endurg the strs of keepg the secrets that one of them is gay and beg discreet how they live their liv.

Even if the girl is a proud and open lbian, that don't mean that she'd want to kiss any girl who her path jt bee she's gay, and that's cludg you.

MY HBAND IS GAY BUT WE’RE MARRIED WH TWO KIDS AND HAVE GREAT SEX

* i am gay but in love with a girl *

Wily regnized as South Korea’s first openly gay K-pop artist, the sger and actor Go Tae-seob, who the stage name Holland, starred a BL drama last year and believ that the growg visibily of BL books, TV seri and movi is a posive step. “Whether you are a heterosexual woman tryg to ject your sexual tonomy to the world, or you are a gay man who wants to see posive reprentatns of male-male romance, BL n be ed, ” he said.

ARE YOU GAY? (FOR GIRLS)

Have you ever wonred,"am i gay, am i straight, am i bi?" Well now is your chance to fd out! this tt will tell you if you are gay, straight or bi. Well what are you wag for, TAKE THE TEST!!! * i am gay but in love with a girl *

The mom-of-two scrib herself as straight while her hband Matthew intifi as gay or pansexual, admtg he is “more attracted to men than women”. Matthew had known he was attracted to men sce he was a teenager, but he belonged to the Church which do not enurage homosexual relatnships. The mom-of-two scrib herself as straight while her hband Matthew intifi as gay or pansexual, admtg he is “more attracted to men than women.

WHY STRAIGHT WOMEN ARE ATTRACTED TO GAY MEN

Are you qutng your sexualy? Fd out if you’re gay, straight, bisexual, or asexual. Learn what the terms mean and if they apply to you. * i am gay but in love with a girl *

Sure, an ocsnal teenage girl falls for a boy who's gay, but don't take most girls very long to figure out that, this se, where there's smoke, there's most fely not fire. In general, the attractn women feel for gay men tends to be emotnal nature, clearg the way for a highly satisfyg relatnship that outlasts most other relatnships gay men and straight women have. To beg, I'll addrs how and why straight women are emotnally attracted to gay men—an attractn, by the way, that is returned by gay men spas.

Send, straight women love gay men bee closens wh gay men provis a wdow to how the mds of men work, somethg that women want to know as they navigate datg waters wh their straight male peers. Though there are, of urse, differenc between straight and gay men, gay men are neverthels men who share many characteristics and motivatns wh straight men.

When to the sexualy of young straight and gay men—meang, how equently they thk about sex, want , or feel impatient to get to the actual sex part—there are undoubtedly siari. When a straight woman hangs out wh a gay man, she begs to put the puzzle together that men, general, treat sex differently than women do.

AM I GAY/STRAIGHT? ?️‍? (FEMALE EDN)

Are you gay? Fd out now by takg what might be the longt 'Am I gay?' tt EVER ma! Answer all 45 qutns hontly and you will get to the tth! * i am gay but in love with a girl *

In general, gay men, and gay women, too, tend to be more fearls than their straight unterparts—particularly straight men—bee they’ve ually experienced bullyg and prejudice bee of their sexual orientatn. Meanwhile, gay men have the social license to be as outrageo or emotnal as they want to be bee gay men don't have to f to such a tightly prcribed role.

Instead, they feel more fortable removg the sexual factor that exists at straight bars and prefer the harmlsns that wh socializg wh gay men gay surroundgs. This type of relatnship is often unhealthy, wh women choosg gay men as iends for superficial reasons: bee they're more fun and love to shop.

If straight women and gay men foc on fdg iendships where there's te emotnal patibily and rpect, they n velop one of the most rewardg relatnships a person uld have. But to actually be lockg ey wh Ellen and hold her, shakg hands as she said, "I'm gay, " on natnal televisn and for the first time, as she has shared outloud that way publicly, was such a profoundly extraordary and timate gift to that moment that I will forever be grateful for.

I’M THE GIRL WHO FELL IN LOVE WH A GAY GUY

Men beg attracted to another man emotnally, physilly, and mentally are known as gays. Fd out if you're gay wh our quiz. * i am gay but in love with a girl *

And guys, if you’re gay and feel like a girl starts fallg for you, tell her as soon as possible and keep her close, she will be an amazg iend to you!

‘HE BROKE MY HEART TO A BILLN PIEC’: WHEN A STRAIGHT WOMAN FALLS LOVE WH A GAY MAN

You so obvly nnot be gay, was her implitn, bee this is good was 2006, a full five years before Lady Gaga would set the Born This Way argument atop s unassailable cultural perch, but even then the popular unrstandg of orientatn was that was somethg you were born wh, somethg you uldn’t change.

I me out at a nservative Christian llege the US and was a gay relatnship for around two years wh a basketball player who end up marryg a woman. Well, you mt have been gay the whole time, some might thk, and bee of some relig shame, you cid to lie to yourself and experiment wh a girl.

But what feels most accurate to say is that I’m gay – but I wasn’t born this people may fd their sir changg directn - and n't jt be explaed as experimentatn (Cred: Ignac Lehmann)In 1977, jt over 10% of Amerins thought gayns was somethg you were born wh, acrdg to Gallup.

I INTIFIED AS A GAY MAN, THEN I FELL IN LOVE WH MY FEMALE HOEMATE IN LOCKDOWN

Throughout the same perd, the number of Amerins who believe homosexualy is “due to someone’s upbrgg/environment” fell om jt unr 60% to ias reached cril mass pop culture, first wh Lady Gaga’s 2011 Born This Way and one year later wh Macklemore’s Same Love, the chos of which has a gay person sgg “I n’t change even if I tried, even if I wanted to. ” Around the same time, the Human Rights Campaign clared unequivolly that “Beg gay is not a choice, ” and to claim that is “giv unwarranted crence to roundly disproven practic such as nversn or reparative therapy. ”People who challenge the Born This Way narrative are often st as homophobic, and their thkg is nsired backwardAs Jane Ward not Not Gay: Sex Between Straight Whe Men, what’s tertg about many of the claims is how transparent their speakers are wh their polil motivatns.

“Such statements, ” she wr, “fe blogil acunts wh an obligatory and nearly ercive force, suggtg that anyone who scrib homosexual sire as a choice or social nstctn is playg to the hands of the enemy.

” People who challenge the Born This Way narrative are often st as homophobic, and their thkg is nsired backward – even if they are themselv, for example, Cynthia Nixon of Sex and The Cy fame. ”Gay rights do not have to hge on a geic explanatn for sexualy (Cred: Ignac Lehmann)For Aravosis, and many gay activists like him, the public will only accept and affirm gay people if they thk they were born gay.

THE AM I GAY TT (MEN ONLY!)

Patrick Grzanka, Assistant Profsor of Psychology at Universy of Tennsee, for stance, has shown that some people who believe that homosexualy is nate still hold negative views of gays.

In fact, the homophobic and non-homophobic rponnts he studied shared siar levels of belief a Born This Way Samantha Allen not at The Daily Beast, the growg public support for gays and lbians has grown out of proportn wh the rise the number of people who believe homosexualy is fixed at birth; would be unlikely that this small change opn uld expla the spike support for gay marriage, for stance. “It don’t seem to matter as much whether or not people believe that gay people are born that way as do that they simply know someone who is currently gay, ” Allen spe of the studi, those who ph agast Born This Way narrativ have been heavily cricised by gay activists. Siarly, Ward has received her own hatemail for phg agast the lg LGB narrativ, wh some gays tellg her she’s “worse than Ann Coulter, ” the ntroversial US thor of books like If Democrats Had Any Bras, They’d Be Republins.

And when I published my say on choosg to be gay, an irate Amerin lbian activist wrote me that had “jt been nfirmed” to her that my wrg was “directly rponsible for four gay aths Rsia. There is a unanimo opn that gay “nversn therapy” should be rejectedLet’s first be clear that whatever the origs of our sexual orientatn, there is a unanimo opn that gay “nversn therapy” should be rejected. The efforts are potentially harmful, acrdg to the APA, “bee they prent the view that the sexual orientatn of lbian, gay and bisexual youth is a mental illns of disorr, and they often ame the abily to change one’s sexual orientatn as a personal and moral failure.

AM I GAY?

The APA, for example, while notg that most people experience ltle to no choice over their orientatns, says this of homosexualy’s origs:“Although much rearch has examed the possible geic, hormonal, velopmental, social and cultural fluenc on sexual orientatn, no fdgs have emerged that perm scientists to nclu that sexual orientatn is termed by any particular factor or factors. ”Siarly, the Amerin Psychiatric Associatn wr a 2013 statement that while the of heterosexualy and homosexualy are currently unknown, they are likely “multifactorial cludg blogil and behavral roots which may vary between different dividuals and may even vary over time. ” Acrdg to LeVay’s rearch, a specific part of the bra, the third terstial nucls of the anterr hypothalam (INAH-3), is smaller homosexual men than is heterosexual as they might, scientists have stggled to inty any particular gen that nsistently predict the directns of our love and sire (Cred: Ignac Lehmann)Read moreYou n spot the problem wh this study a e away: were the gay bras LeVay studied born that way, or did they bee that way?

Another landmark paper on the origs of homosexualy was published 1993 by a geicist named Dean Hamer, who was terted to learn whether homosexualy uld be hered. Begng om his observatn that there are more gay relativ on a mother’s si than a father’s, Hamer turned his attentn to the X chromosome (which is passed on by the mother). Bis the dividual criqu leveled agast each new study announcg some gay gene disvery, there are major methodologil cricisms to make about the entire enterprise general, as Grzanka pots out: “If we look at the raveno pursu, particularly among Amerin scientists, to fd a gay gene, what we see is that the ncln has already been arrived at.

LONGEST GAY TEST!

”The other problem wh Born This Way science is summed up nicely by Simon Copland: “Scientists are askg whether homosexualy is natural when we n’t even agree exactly what homosexualy is. ” Our sir may exprs themselv many different ways that do not all nform to existg notns of ‘gay’, ‘straight’ or ‘bisexual’ is one of the bt takeaways of Ward’s Not Gay, a peratg analysis of sex between straight whe men.

Gay men make up only a actn of the US populatn — yet Ward says that there are many men not clud that number who engage homosexual behavr. Ccially, she argu, “whether or not this baggage is appealg is a separate matter altogether om the appeal of homosexual or heterosexual sex. ”Gay or not, our sir are oriented and re-oriented throughout our liv (Cred: Ignac Lehmann)In fact, the straight-intified men Ward studied for her book sometim found themselv suatns that sparked the sire for homosexual sex: aterni, ployments, public rtrooms, etc.

Ward thks this qutn is the next ontier of queer I first said I chose to be gay, a queer Amerin journalist challenged me to name the time and date of my choice.

AM I GAY? QUIZ – 100% RELIABLE TT

I’m claimg that at some pot durg llege, my sexual and romantic sir beme reoriented toward menThkg back to my llege romanc wh women and men, I n beg to unrstand how my own experienc might have helped me to ‘cultivate’ my sire for homosexualy.

I want to be very clear: I’m not claimg I simply began to ‘grow to’ my homosexualy, or that as I beme more fortable wh beg gay, I allowed myself the eedom to exprs what had always been latent wh me. “Limg our unrstandg of any plex human experience is always gog to be worse than allowg to be plited, ” he gay rights activists pared sexualy to relign - a ccial part of our life that we should be ee to practise however we like (Cred: Ignac Lehamann)So what are we to do wh the Born This Way rhetoric? Sendly, the entire search for a gay gene is predited upon the assumptn that homosexualy is not the natural or ‘flt’ state of a velopg human.

A DIFFERENT KD OF "AM I GAY"? QUIZ FOR HIGH SCHOOL TEENS - TT

“That’s a very narrow unrstandg of what jtice looks like, ” says about the ncern that homophob will want to ‘enurage’ gay people to be straight if there’s no blogil basis for sexualy? It don’t take too much creativy to image a scenar which homophobic parents, upon beg rmed their fet has ‘the gay gene’, choose what to them may seem the lser of two evils: abortn.

”Acrdg to surveys, ls than half of Generatn Z intify as "100% heterosexual", suggtg more and more people have embraced their sexual fluidy (Cred: Ignac Lehmann)Perhaps is time to look to the begng of the gay rights movement. “Then there was a shift, and the lears of the movement chose to jump on board wh a ls nuanced argument that people already unrstood: jt like race, people are born wh their homosexualy. More than a third chose a number between one and rponse to the poll, one of my Facebook iends quipped about how natural selectn mt be workg overtime, what wh makg all of gay!

I’m thankful for a new generatn that is pable of imagg sexualy a way that transcends the gay/straight bary, that uldn’t re ls about what happened to their bodi and mds to make them who they are today. When enterg to a ser relatnship wh a bisexual person, be prepared to accept their attractn to a person of another genr—the same way straight or gay folks are attracted to members of one sex. Do not suggt that they are heterosexual if they are a relatnship wh a person of a different genr, or that they are gay if they are a same-genr relatnship.

*BEAR-MAGAZINE.COM* I AM GAY BUT IN LOVE WITH A GIRL

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article-groups leadg-100 mb-8"><li class="le font-polysans-mono text-12 font-medium upperse trackg-12 text-blurple"><a class="hover:shadow-unrle-her" href="/how-to-be-human">How to be human</a><span class="px-6">/</span></li><li class="le font-polysans-mono text-12 font-medium upperse trackg-12 text-blurple"><a class="hover:shadow-unrle-her" href="/advice">Advice</a></li></ul><h1 class="mb-28 hidn max-w-[900px] font-polysans text-45 font-bold leadg-100 selectn:bg-ankl-20 lg:block">How to be human: when you fall love wh the very unavailable</h1><span class="sticky-nav-trigger"></span><div class="flex flex-l lg:flex-row-reverse lg:jtify-end"><div class="flex-l lg:flex lg:ml-40"><div class="mb-24 grow"><h1 class="le font-polysans text-22 font-bold leadg-110 md:text-33 lg:hidn">How to be human: when you fall love wh the very unavailable</h1></div><div><div class="mb-16 w-[200px] borr-t borr-gray-bd lg:hidn"></div><div class="mb-2 text-blurple [&>p>span:first-child]:text-gray-13 [&]:text-gray-13"><p class="duet--article--article-byle max-w-[550px] font-polysans text-12 leadg-120"><span>By</span> <span><span class="duet--article-byle-and"></span> <span class="font-medium"><a class="hover:shadow-unrle-her" href="/thors/leah-reich">Leah Reich</a></span></span></p></div><div class="duet--article--date-and-ments mb-12 font-polysans text-12 text-gray-5a"><time dateTime="2016-12-04T16:59:01.000Z" class="duet--article--timtamp font-polysans text-12"> <!-- -->Dec 4, 2016, 4:59 PM UTC</time><span class="mx-8 hidn md:le">|</span><button tle="Go to ments" class="duet--article--ments-lk block md:le"><svg class="mr-4 le" width="12" height="12" fill="none" viewBox="0 0 12 12" stroke-width="1px" xmlns="><tle>Comments</tle><path d="M2.4 9.1h-.207l-.147.146L.5 10.793V1.2c0-.384.316-.7.7-.7h9.6c.384 0 .7.316.7.7v7.2c0 .384-.316.7-.7.7H2.4Z" stroke="currentColor"></path></svg><span class="font-polysans text-12 unrle"><span class="ral-unt" 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(2490x910:2491x911):format(webp)/ 96w, (2490x910:2491x911):format(webp)/ 128w, (2490x910:2491x911):format(webp)/ 256w, (2490x910:2491x911):format(webp)/ 376w, (2490x910:2491x911):format(webp)/ 384w, (2490x910:2491x911):format(webp)/ 415w, (2490x910:2491x911):format(webp)/ 480w, (2490x910:2491x911):format(webp)/ 540w, (2490x910:2491x911):format(webp)/ 640w, (2490x910:2491x911):format(webp)/ 750w, (2490x910:2491x911):format(webp)/ 828w, (2490x910:2491x911):format(webp)/ 1080w, (2490x910:2491x911):format(webp)/ 1200w, (2490x910:2491x911):format(webp)/ 1440w, (2490x910:2491x911):format(webp)/ 1920w, (2490x910:2491x911):format(webp)/ 2048w, (2490x910:2491x911):format(webp)/ 2400w" src="(2490x910:2491x911):format(webp)/" dg="async" data-nimg="rponsive" style="posn:absolute;top:0;left:0;bottom:0;right:0;box-sizg:borr-box;paddg:0;borr:none;marg:to;display:block;width:0;height:0;m-width:100%;max-width:100%;m-height:100%;max-height:100%;object-f:ver"/></span><div class="duet--media--ptn pt-6 font-polysans-mono text-12 font-light leadg-130 trackg-1"> <ce class="duet--article--dangeroly-set-cms-markup le not-alic text-gray-63 dark:text-gray-bd [&>a:hover]:text-gray-63 [&>a:hover]:shadow-unrle-black dark:[&>a:hover]:text-gray-bd dark:[&>a:hover]:shadow-unrle-gray [&>a]:shadow-unrle-gray-63 dark:[&>a]:text-gray-bd dark:[&>a]:shadow-unrle-gray"><a href="><strong>Iouri Gosev/Flickr</strong></a></ce></div></figure></div></div></div></div><div class="relative md:mx-to md:flex md:max-w-ntaer-md lg:max-w-none"><div class="duet--article--article-body-ponent-ntaer clearfix sm:ml-to md:ml-100 md:max-w-article-body lg:mx-100"><div><div class="duet--article--article-body-ponent"><p class="duet--article--dangeroly-set-cms-markup duet--article--standard-paragraph mb-20 font-fkroman text-18 leadg-160 -trackg-1 selectn:bg-ankl-20 dark:text-whe dark:selectn:bg-blurple [&_a:hover]:shadow-highlight-ankl dark:[&_a:hover]:shadow-highlight-blurple [&_a]:shadow-unrle-black dark:[&_a]:shadow-unrle-whe"><a href="><em>Leah Reich</em></a><em> was one of the first ter advice lumnists. Her lumn "</em><a href="><em>Ask Leah</em></a><em>" ran on IGN, where she gave advice to gamers for two and a half years. Durg the day, Leah is Slack’s er rearcher, but her views here do not reprent her employer. How to be Human ns every other Sunday. You n wre to her at <strong> </strong>and </em><a href="><em>read more How to be Human here</em></a>.</p></div><div class="duet--article--article-body-ponent"><p class="duet--article--dangeroly-set-cms-markup duet--article--standard-paragraph mb-20 font-fkroman text-18 leadg-160 -trackg-1 selectn:bg-ankl-20 dark:text-whe dark:selectn:bg-blurple [&_a:hover]:shadow-highlight-ankl dark:[&_a:hover]:shadow-highlight-blurple [&_a]:shadow-unrle-black dark:[&_a]:shadow-unrle-whe"><strong>Hi Leah,</strong></p></div><div class="duet--article--article-body-ponent"><p class="duet--article--dangeroly-set-cms-markup duet--article--standard-paragraph mb-20 font-fkroman text-18 leadg-160 -trackg-1 selectn:bg-ankl-20 dark:text-whe dark:selectn:bg-blurple [&_a:hover]:shadow-highlight-ankl dark:[&_a:hover]:shadow-highlight-blurple [&_a]:shadow-unrle-black dark:[&_a]:shadow-unrle-whe"><strong>I’m a 21-year-old gay male who liv the Pacific Northwt. I’m out to those close to me, but I’m the closet publicly for now. I feel ’s a personal thg, my sexualy, so I only tell to those I re about. Pl, I live a super-nservative unty, and after the electn, tst me when I say ’s better I stay the closet for the time beg. The kd of hate I’m seeg lately towards mori is sry as hell.</strong></p></div><div class="duet--article--article-body-ponent"><p class="duet--article--dangeroly-set-cms-markup duet--article--standard-paragraph mb-20 font-fkroman text-18 leadg-160 -trackg-1 selectn:bg-ankl-20 dark:text-whe dark:selectn:bg-blurple [&_a:hover]:shadow-highlight-ankl dark:[&_a:hover]:shadow-highlight-blurple [&_a]:shadow-unrle-black dark:[&_a]:shadow-unrle-whe"><strong>Beg gay, and livg where I do, I’ve never… well, had a romantic relatnship and obvly, I’ve never gone the distance wh anyone eher. (I’ll eely adm, that’s a tough thg for me to say, pecially when we live a society where sex is held such high regard, and those who don’t have are eher unattractive or have ‘other’ issu.) I didn’t fake High School and pretend to be straight by havg a girliend or anythg like that. I jt managed to avoid the qutn, and sce I intify strongly on the mascule si of the spectm, most people haven’t a clue.</strong></p></div><div class="duet--article--article-body-ponent"><p class="duet--article--dangeroly-set-cms-markup duet--article--standard-paragraph mb-20 font-fkroman text-18 leadg-160 -trackg-1 selectn:bg-ankl-20 dark:text-whe dark:selectn:bg-blurple [&_a:hover]:shadow-highlight-ankl dark:[&_a:hover]:shadow-highlight-blurple [&_a]:shadow-unrle-black dark:[&_a]:shadow-unrle-whe"><strong>So whout any romantic background, I’ve found I velop csh fairly easily on guys I’m around, pecially those who are attractive both personaly and looks. Nothg’s ever e of the though, as I’ve never had the urage to act on them sce I’ve never been able to tell if the guys are actually gay or not. Let’s jt say that when to flirtg, relatnships, and sex, I’m hopelsly lost and experienced.</strong></p></div><div class="duet--article--article-body-ponent"><p class="duet--article--dangeroly-set-cms-markup duet--article--standard-paragraph mb-20 font-fkroman text-18 leadg-160 -trackg-1 selectn:bg-ankl-20 dark:text-whe dark:selectn:bg-blurple [&_a:hover]:shadow-highlight-ankl dark:[&_a:hover]:shadow-highlight-blurple [&_a]:shadow-unrle-black dark:[&_a]:shadow-unrle-whe"><strong>So, about a year ago at work, a new employee was hired. He’s olr than me by about ne years, but he’s still credibly young and extremely, extremely attractive. He’s a jock who’s very f, tall and handsome. But he’s also extremely kd and our personali kda clicked.</strong></p></div><div class="duet--article--article-body-ponent"><p class="duet--article--dangeroly-set-cms-markup duet--article--standard-paragraph mb-20 font-fkroman text-18 leadg-160 -trackg-1 selectn:bg-ankl-20 dark:text-whe dark:selectn:bg-blurple [&_a:hover]:shadow-highlight-ankl dark:[&_a:hover]:shadow-highlight-blurple [&_a]:shadow-unrle-black dark:[&_a]:shadow-unrle-whe"><strong>At first before I really got to know him, I veloped the ual csh on him. And as we beme iends, and as I got to know him more, that csh went away and somethg far more powerful replaced . I began to fall love wh him. I’m nfint ’s love bee well, when I’m around him, talkg to him, I feel good — extremely good, like I’m worth a ln bucks kda good. He mak me se and happy; he mak me lgh. I feel whole around him. And whenever I thk of him, I get such strong emotns that I sometim feel physilly sick. As I said, I’ve had several dozen csh over the years. None have ever e close to the feelgs I have for my worker. In a perfect world, I hontly thk he’s the one. Our chemistry seems almost too perfect. I would do anythg for him. Take a bullet for him, no qutns asked. This gets to the root of my problem. In a perfect world, my worker would be gay and sgle.</strong></p></div><div class="duet--article--article-body-ponent"><p class="duet--article--dangeroly-set-cms-markup duet--article--standard-paragraph mb-20 font-fkroman text-18 leadg-160 -trackg-1 selectn:bg-ankl-20 dark:text-whe dark:selectn:bg-blurple [&_a:hover]:shadow-highlight-ankl dark:[&_a:hover]:shadow-highlight-blurple [&_a]:shadow-unrle-black dark:[&_a]:shadow-unrle-whe"><strong>Sadly, this isn’t a perfect world, and my worker is straight, and very recently married.</strong></p></div><div class="duet--article--article-body-ponent"><p class="duet--article--dangeroly-set-cms-markup duet--article--standard-paragraph mb-20 font-fkroman text-18 leadg-160 -trackg-1 selectn:bg-ankl-20 dark:text-whe dark:selectn:bg-blurple [&_a:hover]:shadow-highlight-ankl dark:[&_a:hover]:shadow-highlight-blurple [&_a]:shadow-unrle-black dark:[&_a]:shadow-unrle-whe"><strong>Yay me. Fallg for someone I uld never, ever hope to ever be wh. I’m certaly not nial about , but here’s the thg, I don’t know how to <em>un-</em>fall love wh him. I’ve tried distancg myself om him at work and ignorg him, but that don’t work. And while I n never be there for him the way I’d like, I do not want to lose him as a iend. He’s lerally the only out-of-clost iend I have and losg him would only make the pa of our suatn unbearable.</strong></p></div><div class="duet--article--article-body-ponent"><p class="duet--article--dangeroly-set-cms-markup duet--article--standard-paragraph mb-20 font-fkroman text-18 leadg-160 -trackg-1 selectn:bg-ankl-20 dark:text-whe dark:selectn:bg-blurple [&_a:hover]:shadow-highlight-ankl dark:[&_a:hover]:shadow-highlight-blurple [&_a]:shadow-unrle-black dark:[&_a]:shadow-unrle-whe"><strong>Some thgs you should know. I have told him I’m gay (he was very supportive and thanked me for my tst him), and I’ve very recently told him about my feelgs towards him. I wasn’t pletely hont to the extent that those feelgs go, but he got the msage.</strong></p></div><div class="duet--article--article-body-ponent"><p class="duet--article--dangeroly-set-cms-markup duet--article--standard-paragraph mb-20 font-fkroman text-18 leadg-160 -trackg-1 selectn:bg-ankl-20 dark:text-whe dark:selectn:bg-blurple [&_a:hover]:shadow-highlight-ankl dark:[&_a:hover]:shadow-highlight-blurple [&_a]:shadow-unrle-black dark:[&_a]:shadow-unrle-whe"><strong>The part that kills me, is his rponse to my admtance was along the l of “I’m really sorry” and “I’ll be there for you if you want, whatever you need,” or “if you need some time or distance to work this out that’s ol…”</strong></p></div><div class="duet--article--article-body-ponent"><p class="duet--article--dangeroly-set-cms-markup duet--article--standard-paragraph mb-20 font-fkroman text-18 leadg-160 -trackg-1 selectn:bg-ankl-20 dark:text-whe dark:selectn:bg-blurple [&_a:hover]:shadow-highlight-ankl dark:[&_a:hover]:shadow-highlight-blurple [&_a]:shadow-unrle-black dark:[&_a]:shadow-unrle-whe"><strong>What I didn’t get and what I was hopg for was downright rejectn. He never told me that he didn’t feel the same. He never said explicly that he wasn’t open to beg somethg more.</strong></p></div><div class="duet--article--article-body-ponent"><p class="duet--article--dangeroly-set-cms-markup duet--article--standard-paragraph mb-20 font-fkroman text-18 leadg-160 -trackg-1 selectn:bg-ankl-20 dark:text-whe dark:selectn:bg-blurple [&_a:hover]:shadow-highlight-ankl dark:[&_a:hover]:shadow-highlight-blurple [&_a]:shadow-unrle-black dark:[&_a]:shadow-unrle-whe"><strong>Maybe he felt was implied, wh his marriage and all but hontly, my md is graspg at whatever hope remas. Sad, I know, but I don’t know how to get past this. All I do know is he’s a great guy, and he serv someone better than me. It’s not fair to him that I’m like this. It’s not right, and I feel pretty ashamed about actually.</strong></p></div><div class="duet--article--article-body-ponent"><p class="duet--article--dangeroly-set-cms-markup duet--article--standard-paragraph mb-20 font-fkroman text-18 leadg-160 -trackg-1 selectn:bg-ankl-20 dark:text-whe dark:selectn:bg-blurple [&_a:hover]:shadow-highlight-ankl dark:[&_a:hover]:shadow-highlight-blurple [&_a]:shadow-unrle-black dark:[&_a]:shadow-unrle-whe"><strong>Lastly, I’m someone who’s stggled wh beg alone for a long time. I would often spend sleepls nights paralyzed by lonels, but my worker and the feelgs I have for him has largely filled this void. I’m terrified of gog back to the way thgs were before he me along. I don’t want to feel that way aga, but I know if I do let him go that I will end up feelg this way aga.</strong></p></div><div class="duet--article--article-body-ponent"><p class="duet--article--dangeroly-set-cms-markup duet--article--standard-paragraph mb-20 font-fkroman text-18 leadg-160 -trackg-1 selectn:bg-ankl-20 dark:text-whe dark:selectn:bg-blurple [&_a:hover]:shadow-highlight-ankl dark:[&_a:hover]:shadow-highlight-blurple [&_a]:shadow-unrle-black dark:[&_a]:shadow-unrle-whe"><strong>Anyways, unrequed love. It kda sucks. So if you have any advice, or need more tails, I’m all ears. It’s not that I don’t know how to be human. I’m aaid that I’m feelg too much as a human. Please help.</strong></p></div><div class="duet--article--article-body-ponent"><p class="duet--article--dangeroly-set-cms-markup duet--article--standard-paragraph mb-20 font-fkroman text-18 leadg-160 -trackg-1 selectn:bg-ankl-20 dark:text-whe dark:selectn:bg-blurple [&_a:hover]:shadow-highlight-ankl dark:[&_a:hover]:shadow-highlight-blurple [&_a]:shadow-unrle-black dark:[&_a]:shadow-unrle-whe"><strong>Thank you,</strong></p></div><div class="duet--article--article-body-ponent"><p class="duet--article--dangeroly-set-cms-markup duet--article--standard-paragraph mb-20 font-fkroman text-18 leadg-160 -trackg-1 selectn:bg-ankl-20 dark:text-whe dark:selectn:bg-blurple [&_a:hover]:shadow-highlight-ankl dark:[&_a:hover]:shadow-highlight-blurple [&_a]:shadow-unrle-black dark:[&_a]:shadow-unrle-whe"><strong>-Sigma Tell  </strong></p></div><div class="duet--article--article-body-ponent"><p class="duet--article--dangeroly-set-cms-markup duet--article--standard-paragraph mb-20 font-fkroman text-18 leadg-160 -trackg-1 selectn:bg-ankl-20 dark:text-whe dark:selectn:bg-blurple [&_a:hover]:shadow-highlight-ankl dark:[&_a:hover]:shadow-highlight-blurple [&_a]:shadow-unrle-black dark:[&_a]:shadow-unrle-whe">Hey ST,</p></div><div class="duet--article--article-body-ponent"><p class="duet--article--dangeroly-set-cms-markup duet--article--standard-paragraph mb-20 font-fkroman text-18 leadg-160 -trackg-1 selectn:bg-ankl-20 dark:text-whe dark:selectn:bg-blurple [&_a:hover]:shadow-highlight-ankl dark:[&_a:hover]:shadow-highlight-blurple [&_a]:shadow-unrle-black dark:[&_a]:shadow-unrle-whe">Oh my iend, have you e to the right place. You know, the reason I lled this lumn How To Be Human is bee beg human is hard. It’s a challenge for most of — whether we feel too much, not much at all, or simply don’t know how to handle whatever feelgs we have. Hontly, most of a batn of the three at var pots our liv. </p></div><div class="duet--article--article-body-ponent"><p class="duet--article--dangeroly-set-cms-markup duet--article--standard-paragraph mb-20 font-fkroman text-18 leadg-160 -trackg-1 selectn:bg-ankl-20 dark:text-whe dark:selectn:bg-blurple [&_a:hover]:shadow-highlight-ankl dark:[&_a:hover]:shadow-highlight-blurple [&_a]:shadow-unrle-black dark:[&_a]:shadow-unrle-whe">Here’s another reason this is the right place. Your humble advice lumnist spent much of her life pursu of people who were unavailable for one reason or other. I’ve had to e to some hont and paful realizatns about why I did that, and I want to share those tths wh you. They might be hard to hear, and you might dismiss them. That’s okay. Would you believe took me until I was 40 to fally listen to this advice myself, and to unrstand my behavr a way that’s allowed me to start changg ? This is my way of sayg that you should save this letter and read ocsnally. You’ll know when you’re ready to <em>hear </em> and to change. (It’s also my wkg way of sayg that ’s not surprisg a 30-year-old man still seems so youthful. He is!)</p></div><div class="duet--article--article-body-ponent"><p class="duet--article--dangeroly-set-cms-markup duet--article--standard-paragraph mb-20 font-fkroman text-18 leadg-160 -trackg-1 selectn:bg-ankl-20 dark:text-whe dark:selectn:bg-blurple [&_a:hover]:shadow-highlight-ankl dark:[&_a:hover]:shadow-highlight-blurple [&_a]:shadow-unrle-black dark:[&_a]:shadow-unrle-whe">The first thg I want to acknowledge is that I n never know what ’s like to grow up as a young gay man. That don’t mean I n’t empathize wh you, though. I also want to addrs ia that beg a virg or beg sexually experienced means somethg is wrong wh you. Our society has a much more plited relatnship wh sex than simply “high regard” — although tradnal heterosexual society and gay muni are neher the same nor monolhic. Regardls, please know that while I unrstand ’s tough for you to adm your lack of experience, I want to enurage you to not see as a failure, as somethg wrong wh you, or even as somethg weird or bad. There are far more people like you out there than you realize. It’s jt that, like you, they don’t talk about , bee we don’t make fortable for people to talk about a lack of experience.</p></div><div class="duet--article--article-body-ponent"><p class="duet--article--dangeroly-set-cms-markup duet--article--standard-paragraph mb-20 font-fkroman text-18 leadg-160 -trackg-1 selectn:bg-ankl-20 dark:text-whe dark:selectn:bg-blurple [&_a:hover]:shadow-highlight-ankl dark:[&_a:hover]:shadow-highlight-blurple [&_a]:shadow-unrle-black dark:[&_a]:shadow-unrle-whe">But your letter isn’t about sex. It’s about unrequed love, specifilly for your worker. Even though I’ve <a href=">wrten about</a> <a href=">unrequed love before</a>, I haven’t had the chance to wre what I want to say to you. Which is this:</p></div><div class="duet--article--article-body-ponent"><p class="duet--article--dangeroly-set-cms-markup duet--article--standard-paragraph mb-20 font-fkroman text-18 leadg-160 -trackg-1 selectn:bg-ankl-20 dark:text-whe dark:selectn:bg-blurple [&_a:hover]:shadow-highlight-ankl dark:[&_a:hover]:shadow-highlight-blurple [&_a]:shadow-unrle-black dark:[&_a]:shadow-unrle-whe">Fallg for unavailable people is a very easy thg to do. Many of do , sometim for most of our liv. The person may be emotnally or geographilly unavailable, married or otherwise a long-term monogamo relatnship, gay or straight or simply not attracted to , and so on. Emotns are not always very logil thgs. Attractn is often a mystery nctn of physil and mental chemistry, timg, mood, and more. Humans are still animals at some level, right? I get that your attractn to your worker is a very real thg that you n’t totally ntrol, and I don’t want to dismiss that part of .</p></div><div class="duet--article--article-body-ponent"><p class="duet--article--dangeroly-set-cms-markup duet--article--standard-paragraph mb-20 font-fkroman text-18 leadg-160 -trackg-1 selectn:bg-ankl-20 dark:text-whe dark:selectn:bg-blurple [&_a:hover]:shadow-highlight-ankl dark:[&_a:hover]:shadow-highlight-blurple [&_a]:shadow-unrle-black dark:[&_a]:shadow-unrle-whe">The problem is that fallg for unavailable people is a way to avoid realy. This is pecially temptg when our realy is, like yours, ls than ial. You live a place where you have an extremely limed chance of meetg someone available to you. You don’t feel fortable or safe beg out publicly, which means you n’t openly look for a man you’d want to date or sleep wh, and likely means other gay men who live where you do feel siarly. LGBTQ muni have long relied on signs, s, and hidn spac, many of which are still pafully necsary around the world and, unfortunately, here the US. The ter n help wh nnectns as well, for people who don’t live urban areas wh more active gay, lbian, or trans muni. But you still live where you live, and maybe there aren’t many spac like this where you are, or maybe you haven’t found the people who n show them to you, bee no one feels safe talkg publicly and you pass as straight, so your cycle ntu. </p></div><div class="duet--article--article-body-ponent clear-both block md:float-left md:mr-30 md:w-[320px] lg:-ml-100"><div class="duet--article--article-pullquote mb-20"><div class="mb-10 h-[22px] w-[65px] bg-ankl"></div><p class="duet--article--dangeroly-set-cms-markup relative bg-repeatg-l-dark bg-[length:1px_1.2em] pb-8 font-polysans text-28 font-medium leadg-120 trackg-1 selectn:bg-ankl-20 dark:bg-repeatg-l-light dark:text-whe dark:selectn:bg-blurple">Fallg for unavailable people is a very easy thg to do</p></div></div><div class="duet--article--article-body-ponent"><p class="duet--article--dangeroly-set-cms-markup duet--article--standard-paragraph mb-20 font-fkroman text-18 leadg-160 -trackg-1 selectn:bg-ankl-20 dark:text-whe dark:selectn:bg-blurple [&_a:hover]:shadow-highlight-ankl dark:[&_a:hover]:shadow-highlight-blurple [&_a]:shadow-unrle-black dark:[&_a]:shadow-unrle-whe">Your realy is more than jt this, though. You’re secure about a lot of thgs, cludg your lack of sexual experience. There’s a lot you want to hi. You don’t have the nfince to go out and look for men who might be available to you. What if they judge or lgh at you? What if you don’t know what to do? I also n see you have a ep sense that somethg is wrong wh you. Not only do you mentn this relatn to sex, you brg up aga wh rpect to your worker: He serv someone better than you. When you thk of yourself as a flawed, broken, not-good-enough person, you fd yourself attracted to the people you thk you serve. The people tend to also be flawed, broken, not-good-enough — or people who are so totally unavailable you n create an entire fantasy about who they are and what your life wh them would be like. And by you, I also mean me and all of .</p></div><div class="duet--article--article-body-ponent"><p class="duet--article--dangeroly-set-cms-markup duet--article--standard-paragraph mb-20 font-fkroman text-18 leadg-160 -trackg-1 selectn:bg-ankl-20 dark:text-whe dark:selectn:bg-blurple [&_a:hover]:shadow-highlight-ankl dark:[&_a:hover]:shadow-highlight-blurple [&_a]:shadow-unrle-black dark:[&_a]:shadow-unrle-whe">I promise I’m not dismissg your feelgs for this guy. I have felt exactly as you do about people who were so unavailable to me ’s md-bogglg when I thk about after the fact. And much of my unrequed love has e om my own sire to avoid realy. Why? Bee realy is hard and ’s not always fun. It’s easier to go after people who aren’t available so you n pe forever rather than adm you’re sred to be a relatnship or to m to someone, or so the relatnship n fail for reasons that you n blame on someone or somethg else. Longg for an unavailable person means you don’t have to get hont wh yourself about why, ep down si, you don’t thk you serve someone wonrful, or why you believe someone wonrful serv a better partner than you uld ever hope to be. It is much easier to believe someone else is perfect or at least perfect for you than to regnize and act on your own realy.</p></div><div class="duet--article--article-body-ponent"><p class="duet--article--dangeroly-set-cms-markup duet--article--standard-paragraph mb-20 font-fkroman text-18 leadg-160 -trackg-1 selectn:bg-ankl-20 dark:text-whe dark:selectn:bg-blurple [&_a:hover]:shadow-highlight-ankl dark:[&_a:hover]:shadow-highlight-blurple [&_a]:shadow-unrle-black dark:[&_a]:shadow-unrle-whe">ST, I do not want you to go back to your cshg lonels. I would not wish that on almost anyone. You are a tough spot, lerally and figuratively. You have to thk not only about yourself but about where you live and what your optns are. I don’t have an easy answer for you, but I do have a place for you to beg: You have to get real about your suatn, and you have to start workg on feelg good about yourself. You need to fd more people you n feel safe around, cludg other gay men. Maybe also a therapist, one who is very LGBTQ iendly. You need to feel okay wh yourself so you n <em>be</em> yourself. It’s easier to tell this straight guy about your lack of experience but to tell another gay man probably feels impossible, right? But who is more likely to be able to help you learn to flirt, to regnize other gay men, to fd someone who will help you experiment sexually a safe, nsensual way? I don’t know if you n move, or if you want to, but you do need to fd a way to expand your iend circle and support work. Look for rourc near you, or the neart cy. There are fely other gay men near where you live, you jt have to try and fd them a more stctured way. I bet if you searched for volunteer groups or book clubs or gyms or lerally anythg a nearby large cy, you’d fd somethg. It will be terrifyg, but you n do . Carve out the space to start workg toward a better realy.</p></div><div class="duet--article--article-body-ponent"><p class="duet--article--dangeroly-set-cms-markup duet--article--standard-paragraph mb-20 font-fkroman text-18 leadg-160 -trackg-1 selectn:bg-ankl-20 dark:text-whe dark:selectn:bg-blurple [&_a:hover]:shadow-highlight-ankl dark:[&_a:hover]:shadow-highlight-blurple [&_a]:shadow-unrle-black dark:[&_a]:shadow-unrle-whe">Right now, you have vted nearly all your emotns to a sgle person. He’s your only close iend and your heart’s te sire. This is not staable, eher for you or for him. Give this iend of yours a break and be willg to see the realy that suatn too. He has rejected to you, but an credibly kd way. I thk is a ttament to him as a human and to your iendship that he handled your admissn of feelgs wh kdns. Not bee you’re gay and he’s straight, but bee ’s hard to rpond gracefully when anyone lik you a way you n’t reciprote. It’s awkward, and sometim brgs up feelgs you’re not ready to al wh. Maybe he’s qutned his sexualy, or maybe he’s feelg uncerta about havg gotten married, or maybe he’s feelg god knows what. Don’t ph for him to give you an outright rejectn when ’s you who needs to be willg to honor his iendship by hearg what he’s sayg. And don’t ph yourself to be iends wh him if the romantic feelgs are too overwhelmg.</p></div><div class="duet--article--article-body-ponent clear-both block"><div class="duet--article--article-pullquote mb-20"><div class="mb-10 h-[22px] w-[65px] bg-ankl"></div><p class="duet--article--dangeroly-set-cms-markup relative bg-repeatg-l-dark bg-[length:1px_1.2em] pb-8 font-polysans text-28 font-medium leadg-120 trackg-1 selectn:bg-ankl-20 dark:bg-repeatg-l-light dark:text-whe dark:selectn:bg-blurple">It is much easier to believe someone else is perfect for you than to regnize and act on your own realy</p></div></div><div class="duet--article--article-body-ponent"><p class="duet--article--dangeroly-set-cms-markup duet--article--standard-paragraph mb-20 font-fkroman text-18 leadg-160 -trackg-1 selectn:bg-ankl-20 dark:text-whe dark:selectn:bg-blurple [&_a:hover]:shadow-highlight-ankl dark:[&_a:hover]:shadow-highlight-blurple [&_a]:shadow-unrle-black dark:[&_a]:shadow-unrle-whe">You and I are a lot alike. We have big feelgs and romantic sensibili. We thk hearg someone apologize or reject will somehow solve a suatn or make easier. We kd of want to be rcued rather than diggg and fixg our suatns by ourselv. We vt way too much one person, all our hop and expectatns and energi, and then are thst back to lonels and isolatn when that don’t pan out. I’ve spent a long time figurg out why I’m like this, and how I’d like to be different. I want you to do the same.</p></div><div class="duet--article--article-body-ponent"><p class="duet--article--dangeroly-set-cms-markup duet--article--standard-paragraph mb-20 font-fkroman text-18 leadg-160 -trackg-1 selectn:bg-ankl-20 dark:text-whe dark:selectn:bg-blurple [&_a:hover]:shadow-highlight-ankl dark:[&_a:hover]:shadow-highlight-blurple [&_a]:shadow-unrle-black dark:[&_a]:shadow-unrle-whe">The tth is that fdg relatnships of all sorts, iends or romantic and sexual partners is a msy bs. It’s hard even for people who feel nfint or who live plac where there are more optns than you have. That’s why people like lumns like me. Hey, I’m an advice lumnist and I often don’t don’t know what to do when to my own datg life! Jt last night, I was tryg to figure out how to have a drk wh someone I’m attracted to whout makg totally obv I want to have a drk wh them! </p></div><div class="duet--article--article-body-ponent"><p class="duet--article--dangeroly-set-cms-markup duet--article--standard-paragraph mb-20 font-fkroman text-18 leadg-160 -trackg-1 selectn:bg-ankl-20 dark:text-whe dark:selectn:bg-blurple [&_a:hover]:shadow-highlight-ankl dark:[&_a:hover]:shadow-highlight-blurple [&_a]:shadow-unrle-black dark:[&_a]:shadow-unrle-whe">Beg a human is hard. It’s somethg you kd of have to work on every day. I don’t want you to spend the next two s thkg the only optns are “cshg lonels” and “this person is THE ONE and we are sted to be together, if only they would see .” It is a lossal waste of your time and of your love. I want you to be able to love this iend the way you both serve—as a te iend, one who n be there for him the way he is for you. I want you to have other close iends you tst. I want you to be able to love men who are available to love and sire you. I want you to have really great sex. And the only way you n do that is to figure out how to rcue yourself. </p></div><div class="duet--article--article-body-ponent"><p class="duet--article--dangeroly-set-cms-markup duet--article--standard-paragraph mb-20 font-fkroman text-18 leadg-160 -trackg-1 selectn:bg-ankl-20 dark:text-whe dark:selectn:bg-blurple [&_a:hover]:shadow-highlight-ankl dark:[&_a:hover]:shadow-highlight-blurple [&_a]:shadow-unrle-black dark:[&_a]:shadow-unrle-whe">Lx</p></div><div class="duet--article--article-body-ponent"></div></div><div class="mb-40 mt-30"><button class="duet--article--ments-button group le-flex h-40 w-full ems-center jtify-center round-[2px] borr-[1px] borr-solid borr-blurple font-polysans-mono text-11 font-light upperse trackg-12 text-blurple hover:bg-blurple hover:text-whe md:w-to md:px-30"><svg class="mr-10 le pt-2" width="12" height="14" fill="none" viewBox="0 0 12 12" stroke-width="1px" xmlns="><tle>Comments</tle><path d="M2.4 9.1h-.207l-.147.146L.5 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data-ncert="medium_rectangle_gamtop"></div><sectn class="duet--article--more-stori bg-ankl px-20 pb-16 pt-30 lg:pb-36 lg:pt-50"><div class="md:mx-to md:max-w-ntaer-md lg:max-w-ntaer-lg"><h2 class="mb-16 font-polysans-mono text-16 font-light leadg-120 trackg-2 text-gray-13">More om<!-- --> <a class="borr-b font-medium hover:borr-blurple hover:text-blurple" href="/how-to-be-human">How to be human</a></h2><ul class="divi-y"><li class="flex ems-start borr-black/30 py-16 lg:ems-center"><div class="relative ml-10 mr-20 aspect-square h-[60px] w-[60px] [&>span]:round-[2px]"><span style="box-sizg:borr-box;display:block;overflow:hidn;width:ial;height:ial;background:none;opacy:1;borr:0;marg:0;paddg:0;posn:absolute;top:0;left:0;bottom:0;right:0"><img alt="Whe Hoe" src="data:image/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAIAAAAAAAP///yH5BAEAAAAALAAAAAABAAEAAAIBRAA7" dg="async" data-nimg="fill" style="posn:absolute;top:0;left:0;bottom:0;right:0;box-sizg:borr-box;paddg:0;borr:none;marg:to;display:block;width:0;height:0;m-width:100%;max-width:100%;m-height:100%;max-height:100%;object-f:ver"/><noscript><img alt="Whe Hoe" loadg="lazy" dg="async" data-nimg="fill" style="posn:absolute;top:0;left:0;bottom:0;right:0;box-sizg:borr-box;paddg:0;borr:none;marg:to;display:block;width:0;height:0;m-width:100%;max-width:100%;m-height:100%;max-height:100%;object-f:ver" siz="100vw" srcSet="(550x413:551x414):format(webp)/ 376w, (550x413:551x414):format(webp)/ 415w, (550x413:551x414):format(webp)/ 480w, (550x413:551x414):format(webp)/ 540w, (550x413:551x414):format(webp)/ 640w, (550x413:551x414):format(webp)/ 750w, (550x413:551x414):format(webp)/ 828w, (550x413:551x414):format(webp)/ 1080w, (550x413:551x414):format(webp)/ 1200w, (550x413:551x414):format(webp)/ 1440w, (550x413:551x414):format(webp)/ 1920w, (550x413:551x414):format(webp)/ 2048w, (550x413:551x414):format(webp)/ 2400w" 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style="posn:absolute;top:0;left:0;bottom:0;right:0;box-sizg:borr-box;paddg:0;borr:none;marg:to;display:block;width:0;height:0;m-width:100%;max-width:100%;m-height:100%;max-height:100%;object-f:ver"/><noscript><img alt="Ex Macha promotnal still (A24)" loadg="lazy" dg="async" data-nimg="fill" style="posn:absolute;top:0;left:0;bottom:0;right:0;box-sizg:borr-box;paddg:0;borr:none;marg:to;display:block;width:0;height:0;m-width:100%;max-width:100%;m-height:100%;max-height:100%;object-f:ver" siz="100vw" srcSet="(574x551:575x552):format(webp)/ 376w, (574x551:575x552):format(webp)/ 415w, (574x551:575x552):format(webp)/ 480w, (574x551:575x552):format(webp)/ 540w, (574x551:575x552):format(webp)/ 640w, (574x551:575x552):format(webp)/ 750w, (574x551:575x552):format(webp)/ 828w, (574x551:575x552):format(webp)/ 1080w, (574x551:575x552):format(webp)/ 1200w, (574x551:575x552):format(webp)/ 1440w, (574x551:575x552):format(webp)/ 1920w, (574x551:575x552):format(webp)/ 2048w, 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