David Aksanya is gay- but now he wants to reverse his sexualy. Why? Natasha Courtenay-Smh meets a man on a qut for fulfilment
Contents:
- HOW DO YOU KNOW IF YOU’RE GAY, STRAIGHT, OR SOMETHG BETWEEN?
- LONGEST GAY TEST!
- HOW TO LEAD A HETEROSEXUAL LIFTYLE IF YOU ARE GAY
- THE FACT NO ONE LIK TO ADM: MANY GAY MEN ULD JT HAVE EASILY BEEN STRAIGHT
- NORTH JERSEY STUNTS NEED GAY-STRAIGHT ALLIANC THEIR HIGH SCHOOLS. THIS IS WHY
- LETTERS TO THE EDOR: I’M GAY AND DON’T WANT TO PATRONIZE BIGOTS. THANKS, SUPREME COURT
- JACKSONVILLE JAGUARS ASSISTANT KEV MAXEN BE FIRST MALE ACH MAJOR U.S. PRO LEAGUE TO E OUT AS GAY
- HOW TO KNOW IF YOU ARE GAY
- HOW TO ACCEPT THAT YOU ARE GAY
- ARE YOU BI, STRAIGHT OR GAY?
- OPN I’M GAY. AND I WANT MY KID TO BE GAY, TOO.
- ‘I AM GAY – BUT I WASN’T BORN THIS WAY’
- SOME GAYS CAN GO STRAIGHT, STUDY SAYS
- I THK I AM GAY AND I NEED HELP TO CONVERT TO HETEROSEXUAL?
- HOW DO I KNOW I’M NOT REALLY GAY/STRAIGHT?
- THE GAY MAN WHO WANTS TO GO STRAIGHT
HOW DO YOU KNOW IF YOU’RE GAY, STRAIGHT, OR SOMETHG BETWEEN?
In a society where most are expected to be straight, n be difficult to take a step back and tly ask if you’re gay, straight, or somethg else. There's no "right" way to e to terms wh your orientatn. But there are a few thgs you n do to explore your feelgs and help figure thgs out. Here's how. * i am gay and want to be straight *
When I was young, I was told the whole world was divid to heterosexual men and heterosexual women, bar a small number of unfortunate ‘homosexuals’ of both genrs and possibly an even smaller number a third tegory, ‘bisexuals’, who ‘swung both ways’; pl, fally, a ty band of wretched creatur who were physilly not que one thg or the other.
LONGEST GAY TEST!
Are you gay? Fd out now by takg what might be the longt 'Am I gay?' tt EVER ma! Answer all 45 qutns hontly and you will get to the tth! * i am gay and want to be straight *
I’ve appreciated those who said I helped them love readg, of urse, and those who shared how important was to have a safe person and space to be themselv:“In this town, havg a iendly ally around school is super important, and you have helped more gay kids than you realize.
”My heart and memori are full of other ways our GSA spired safety at school:The pta of the football team, outsi my classroom, explag to his teammat that the Day of Silence was not about gay pri but stead protectg those who have been bullied and harassed, sometim to GSA member who got up ont of the staff and explaed the importance of honorg stunts’ stunt who me to me tears bee their parents threatened to throw them out if they tried to intify as stunt who ran to my classroom wh a iend, neher of them GSA members, bee a teacher was g his ad name and he didn’t know what to do, but my stunt, his iend, knew whom to ask for existence of this club, the fact that stunts know there is someone who will always hold safe space for them — every other Monday om 2:15 to 3:15 p. We need everyone to regnize the needs of vulnerable young people to be seen and accepted so they n grow, learn and safety and succs of everyone our school and throughout the muny pends on accs to the rourc and supportg every stunt who needs Signorelli is a teacher Wt Milford Township Public article origally appeared on NJ stunts need accs to gay-straight stunt allianc.
But to actually be lockg ey wh Ellen and hold her, shakg hands as she said, "I'm gay, " on natnal televisn and for the first time, as she has shared outloud that way publicly, was such a profoundly extraordary and timate gift to that moment that I will forever be grateful for.
HOW TO LEAD A HETEROSEXUAL LIFTYLE IF YOU ARE GAY
Sexualy is plex and ever-evolvg, so how do you know if you're straight, gay, or somethg between? Answer the qutns about your csh and fantasi to fd out. * i am gay and want to be straight *
Wow you have no ia what's is like to be gay, so homophobic- many people fd that their sexual orientatn isn't a sire and 's always been there sce birth jt people like you tell everyone that heterosexualy is normal so people mentally and emotnally even physilly tell themselv to love the oppose sex until they realise a plited and paful procs if who they really are: heterosexual or not...
THE FACT NO ONE LIK TO ADM: MANY GAY MEN ULD JT HAVE EASILY BEEN STRAIGHT
New Jersey stunts need more accs to gay-straight stunt allianc our high schools. Why? They make a huge, clive impact. * i am gay and want to be straight *
Ok no to your first statement the reason a 'gay' person would like girls more do not disprove the born gay theory, this day of age the straight liftyle is naturally phed apon everyone, so you would assume you like girls at first, until around when you h puberty, you start realizg you don't like the oppose genr, and those social nstcts fa off for the most part. How God new he would be before he created him, which is how they all seem to have the munal agreement (the try of god) that homosexually as well as heterosexualy or any other sexual orientatn is of equal value and qualy and all serve huy, bee tth be told if anythg matters then all thgs matters.
NORTH JERSEY STUNTS NEED GAY-STRAIGHT ALLIANC THEIR HIGH SCHOOLS. THIS IS WHY
Im 16 and I would do anythg to be straight aga.(i didn't really bee gay till about 14 and was attracted to girls before that). This topic is answered by a medil expert. * i am gay and want to be straight *
And you my ed don't hurt yoelf, don't build your happs om s of other people (they are as cluels as you are about the wrongs and rights between the two sexuali) some of are hetero and some of are homo 's natural nform and embrace yours and always rpect the one's your not. If you were born as a man, then you are a man unls the doctor prove the oppose, you are an Atheist، i dont know about Atheist but as a mlim my relign lead me to a straight path Healthily, mentally and spirually،So for s not an optn for people om the same genr to have sex wh each other This is the e of many diseas as disverd, now how we protect our selv as our relign tght ,, we simply dont watch porn, thats your half way to beg straight, i also advice you that you dont not have gay sex anymore, if you havnt tried yet stay that way?
There would be no ternalized self-hatred if no one had ever told you that beg gay is wrong, or that gay sex is disgtg, or that gay men n't feel real love, or that beg transgenr is fake, or that beg nonbary is a mental illns or a ll for attentn. Wright, her remendatn.The cisn now go to the school board, which will discs the book challenge at s Monday meetg agenda and vote on a cisn on Tuday.The Tallahassee mom who submted the challenge, Katie Lyons, said her dghter, then a send grar at a lol elementary school, brought home the children's book about Kg, a tennis legend who is gay — and also brought qutns to her mother about a page regardg Kg's sexual orientatn.“It is important that be ma clear that this book was challenged not bee the book mentns Billie Jean Kg is gay,” Lyons told the school board at a meetg last week.
LETTERS TO THE EDOR: I’M GAY AND DON’T WANT TO PATRONIZE BIGOTS. THANKS, SUPREME COURT
* i am gay and want to be straight *
Regardls of orientatn, homosexual or heterosexual, the topic of sexual orientatn is not age-appropriate or velopmentally-appropriate for elementary stunts.” Yet, her plat, filed on April 25, Lyons was more specific wh her ncerns than jt "sexual orientatn," a term broadly referrg to whom one is attracted to."I object to material that discs beg gay and what means to be gay," wrote Lyons.The page drawg the challenge reads: "Around this time, I realized I was gay.
JACKSONVILLE JAGUARS ASSISTANT KEV MAXEN BE FIRST MALE ACH MAJOR U.S. PRO LEAGUE TO E OUT AS GAY
Many young men intify as mostly straight — a sexual orientatn that is not que straight but also, they say, ls gay than bisexualy * i am gay and want to be straight *
Beg gay means that if you're a girl, you love and have romantic feelgs for other girls — and if you're a boy, you love and have romantic feelgs for other boys."Lyons matas the book is ntrary to state law, largely cg the Parental Rights Edutn Act, dubbed "Don't Say Gay" by crics, which prohibs stctn on sexual orientatn or genr inty schools.New book challenge law:Florida schools stggle to apply new book law which even Shakpeare is 'spect'Why 's beg challenged:Tallahassee mom mak se that 'I am Billie Jean Kg' book 'g' on parents' rightsWright, her July 10 remendatn, unters that the book isn’t ed as “stctn” and poted to a clarifitn the Florida Department of Edutn issued statg that "cintal referenc" books to LGBTQ people are not prohibed.Wright also said a new law, HB 1069, directed each school district to adopt procs allowg parents to lim their child’s accs to library material.“This seems to be a reasonable approach bee grants parents the means to rtrict accs to material they fd objectnable while grantg accs to children of parents who fd the material acceptable,” she said.In a June hearg about the challenge, Shane Syett, assistant supertennt of amic servic for Leon County Schools, said the school system would be implementg the new procs for the upg 2023-2024 school year to allow parents to approve readg material before their children check them out."The excln of one of the profil jt bee of the intifitn of the ma subject as homosexual is not the tentn of any law or statute passed by the Florida Legislature," Syett said.But Lyons said the parental book review procs is not enough to screen qutnable materials accsible to their stunts."Havg accs to the book tl and readg reviews do not allow parents to fully screen the ntent of the book; would be easy to miss cril and potentially harmful material," Lyons said last week.This is the first time Florida's pal cy school district has gone through the book challenge procs after Gov.
Some people thk of themselv as straight even if they ocsnally feel attracted to (or have even had relatnships wh) people of the same genr, and some people nsir themselv gay even if they have felt some attractn to/had relatnships wh people of another genr. Disregardg all evince that the ex-gay movement is credibly damagg to more than 90% of those who unrgo "treatment" (bee they clearly jt didn't believe God enough), Settg Captiv Free wants you to know that you were not "born this way.
" Homosexualy is a s that you need to purge om your system, and the only way to do is to follow their three-parts-a-day the app is only downloadable om Google Play (iTun and the 69, 822+ people who petned them don't believe nversn therapy for some reason), there is an abridged versn available on the mistry’s webse. Realize That Beg Homosexual Mak You Feel Alone Fet that we told you to shut yourself away om most of the world, and ignore the ia that maybe gay people feel so alone bee of the discrimatory and hateful attus that they face, helped by people like .
HOW TO KNOW IF YOU ARE GAY
Most people the LGBTQ+ muny know om experience that acceptg your sexualy will lead to your beg a happier, more open this gui, the term gay has been ed to clu all forms of non-heterosexual attractn, whether that be people who are lbian, gay, bisexual, queer, pansexual, or otherwise not straight. I am a girl and i want to stay a girl so i n date boys i am a girl/boy but i don't md which genr bee i like both girls and boys i am a girl and i want to be a boy so i n date girls i am a boy and i want to stay a boy so i n date girls i am a boy but i want to be a girl so i n date boysdo you want to be gay bi or straight? But if my dghter wants to be an artist, I’ll enurage her all the way — and work to stroy any barriers along her path, not put them up, I’ve never for a sgle send regretted beg gay, nor saw as anythg other than an asset and a gift.
We’ve bought every picture book featurg gay fai, even the not-very-good on, and we have most of the nontradnal-genr-role books as well — about the prcs who lik to fight dragons and the boy who lik to wear my dghter plays hoe wh her stuffed koala bears as the mom and dad, we gently remd her that they uld be a dad and dad. You so obvly nnot be gay, was her implitn, bee this is good was 2006, a full five years before Lady Gaga would set the Born This Way argument atop s unassailable cultural perch, but even then the popular unrstandg of orientatn was that was somethg you were born wh, somethg you uldn’t change.
But what feels most accurate to say is that I’m gay – but I wasn’t born this people may fd their sir changg directn - and n't jt be explaed as experimentatn (Cred: Ignac Lehmann)In 1977, jt over 10% of Amerins thought gayns was somethg you were born wh, acrdg to Gallup. Throughout the same perd, the number of Amerins who believe homosexualy is “due to someone’s upbrgg/environment” fell om jt unr 60% to ias reached cril mass pop culture, first wh Lady Gaga’s 2011 Born This Way and one year later wh Macklemore’s Same Love, the chos of which has a gay person sgg “I n’t change even if I tried, even if I wanted to.
HOW TO ACCEPT THAT YOU ARE GAY
”People who challenge the Born This Way narrative are often st as homophobic, and their thkg is nsired backwardAs Jane Ward not Not Gay: Sex Between Straight Whe Men, what’s tertg about many of the claims is how transparent their speakers are wh their polil motivatns. In fact, the homophobic and non-homophobic rponnts he studied shared siar levels of belief a Born This Way Samantha Allen not at The Daily Beast, the growg public support for gays and lbians has grown out of proportn wh the rise the number of people who believe homosexualy is fixed at birth; would be unlikely that this small change opn uld expla the spike support for gay marriage, for stance.
ARE YOU BI, STRAIGHT OR GAY?
“It don’t seem to matter as much whether or not people believe that gay people are born that way as do that they simply know someone who is currently gay, ” Allen spe of the studi, those who ph agast Born This Way narrativ have been heavily cricised by gay activists.
The efforts are potentially harmful, acrdg to the APA, “bee they prent the view that the sexual orientatn of lbian, gay and bisexual youth is a mental illns of disorr, and they often ame the abily to change one’s sexual orientatn as a personal and moral failure. The APA, for example, while notg that most people experience ltle to no choice over their orientatns, says this of homosexualy’s origs:“Although much rearch has examed the possible geic, hormonal, velopmental, social and cultural fluenc on sexual orientatn, no fdgs have emerged that perm scientists to nclu that sexual orientatn is termed by any particular factor or factors. ”Siarly, the Amerin Psychiatric Associatn wr a 2013 statement that while the of heterosexualy and homosexualy are currently unknown, they are likely “multifactorial cludg blogil and behavral roots which may vary between different dividuals and may even vary over time.
OPN I’M GAY. AND I WANT MY KID TO BE GAY, TOO.
” Acrdg to LeVay’s rearch, a specific part of the bra, the third terstial nucls of the anterr hypothalam (INAH-3), is smaller homosexual men than is heterosexual as they might, scientists have stggled to inty any particular gen that nsistently predict the directns of our love and sire (Cred: Ignac Lehmann)Read moreYou n spot the problem wh this study a e away: were the gay bras LeVay studied born that way, or did they bee that way? Bis the dividual criqu leveled agast each new study announcg some gay gene disvery, there are major methodologil cricisms to make about the entire enterprise general, as Grzanka pots out: “If we look at the raveno pursu, particularly among Amerin scientists, to fd a gay gene, what we see is that the ncln has already been arrived at. ” Our sir may exprs themselv many different ways that do not all nform to existg notns of ‘gay’, ‘straight’ or ‘bisexual’ is one of the bt takeaways of Ward’s Not Gay, a peratg analysis of sex between straight whe men.
‘I AM GAY – BUT I WASN’T BORN THIS WAY’
”Gay or not, our sir are oriented and re-oriented throughout our liv (Cred: Ignac Lehmann)In fact, the straight-intified men Ward studied for her book sometim found themselv suatns that sparked the sire for homosexual sex: aterni, ployments, public rtrooms, etc.
SOME GAYS CAN GO STRAIGHT, STUDY SAYS
I’m claimg that at some pot durg llege, my sexual and romantic sir beme reoriented toward menThkg back to my llege romanc wh women and men, I n beg to unrstand how my own experienc might have helped me to ‘cultivate’ my sire for homosexualy. “Limg our unrstandg of any plex human experience is always gog to be worse than allowg to be plited, ” he gay rights activists pared sexualy to relign - a ccial part of our life that we should be ee to practise however we like (Cred: Ignac Lehamann)So what are we to do wh the Born This Way rhetoric? ”Acrdg to surveys, ls than half of Generatn Z intify as "100% heterosexual", suggtg more and more people have embraced their sexual fluidy (Cred: Ignac Lehmann)Perhaps is time to look to the begng of the gay rights movement.
I THK I AM GAY AND I NEED HELP TO CONVERT TO HETEROSEXUAL?
Crics, though, say the study's subjects may be ludg themselv and that the subject group was scientifilly valid bee many of them were referred by anti-gay relig Robert Spzer, a psychiatry profsor at Columbia Universy, said he began his study as a skeptic — believg, as major mental health anizatns do, that sexual orientatn nnot be changed, and attempts to do so n even e Spzer's study, which has not yet been published or reviewed, seems to dite otherwise. Spzer says he spoke to 143 men and 57 women who say they changed their orientatn om gay to straight, and nclud that 66 percent of the men and 44 percent of women reached what he lled good heterosexual functng — a staed, lovg heterosexual relatnship wh the past year and gettg enough emotnal satisfactn to rate at least a seven on a 10-pot said those who changed their orientatn had satisfyg heterosexual sex at least monthly and never or rarely thought of someone of the same sex durg also found that 89 percent of men and 95 percent of women were bothered not at all or only slightly by unwanted homosexual feelgs.
Spzer argu that highly motivated gays n fact change that preference — wh a lot of Study, Old DebateBut crics have challenged the study, even before was formally unveiled at today's ssn of the Amerin Psychiatric Associatn's annual meetg New Orleans, which was jammed wh televisn meras reportg on the prentatn. "In fact, he said, many of his subjects had been sponnt and even suicidal themselv, for the oppose reason — "precisely bee they had prevly thought there was no hope for them, and they had been told by many mental health profsnals that there was no hope for them, they had to jt learn to live wh their homosexual feelgs. "The sample is terrible, totally tated, totally unreprentative of the gay and lbian muny, " said David Ellt, a spokman for the Natnal Gay and Lbian Task Force Spzer says while the people his sample were unual — more relig than the general populatn — don't mean their experienc n be dismissed.
HOW DO I KNOW I’M NOT REALLY GAY/STRAIGHT?
"Conservative, anti-gay, anti-diversy folks are gog to embrace and they're gonna e for their own agenda to ph their pot of view that, y, you don't need equaly Amerin society for gay people bee they n change, " he said.
THE GAY MAN WHO WANTS TO GO STRAIGHT
” Some people’s doubts are further plited by havg such experienc as hearg other people talkg or lookg their directn and thkg that the people mt be analyzg their behavr or appearance and talkg about them – discsg how they mt be gay (or straight).
I have sometim wonred if those who experience the most distrs om such thoughts as the do so bee they were raised wh more strongly homophobic or anti-gay attus to beg wh, or if is simply bee one’s sexualy n be such a basic doubt. For ee real time breakg news alerts sent straight to your box sign up to our breakg news emailsSign up to our ee breakg news emailsAfter 24 years of livg as a gay man, Aksanya is beg eply perturbed by what he se as the nstrats of his sexualy. The movement was alt a huge blow 2000 when s most famo graduate, a former drag queen lled John Plk, whose succs wh Exod had seen him featured on the ver of Newsweek, was photographed by paparazzi apparently enjoyg the lights of a gay the last few weeks, the ntent issue of reparative therapy was aga the spotlight, wh a bate sparked by a gay Tennsee teenager, Zach Stark.
Yet when the men were forced to choose between straight, bisexual or gay, about three-quarters marked straight bee for them bisexual, even if is unrstood as “bisexual-leang straight, ” is too gay to accurately scribe their inty. This is, unfortunately, only partially te, bee as adults those straight boys bee gay boys, and so, while there might be a b of reciprocy, we’re still left fancyg a iend, -worker, or that cute guy who works at Barn & Noble and whose glance always lgers jt a b too long when you buy a book (and you buy too many bee of said cute guy. It’s bee heteronormative society teach that if you have romantic feelgs for someone, you should act some way upon them, and the suatns gays rarely, I’m not advotg for gay people to keep their romantic clatns to themselv.