For a now, Christian parents have been askg my wife and me for help parentg their gay kids. As a Christian dad of a gay son, I wish there had been someone to talk me through the issu raised by my son’s disclosure of his sexualy. But the evangelil church has until very recently said very ltle about homosexualy, except that is a s and that those who
Contents:
- 10 REASONS GOD LOV GAY CHRISTIANS
- “HELP! I’M A GAY CHRISTIAN”
- SHOULD CHRISTIANS “DISOWN” GAY SONS AND DGHTERS?
- WHAT WOULD YOU DO IF YOUR CHILD SAID, 'I'M GAY'?
- I AM A GAY CHRISTIAN
- JACKSONVILLE JAGUARS ASSISTANT KEV MAXEN BE FIRST MALE ACH MAJOR U.S. PRO LEAGUE TO E OUT AS GAY
- ‘I AM A GAY CHRISTIAN’: DEBAT ABOUT LGBTQ ACCEPTANCE ROIL SEATTLE-AREA NONPROFS, CHURCH
- RAISG A GAY TEEN: WHEN FAH, FAY AND SEXUALY LLI
- SHOULD A CHRISTIAN HAVE GAY IENDS?
- "I AM GAY, AND I AM A CHRISTIAN." ON MY HONOR SGER OUT, POSTS BLOG
- IS POSSIBLE TO BE A GAY CHRISTIAN?
- AM I GAY?
- HOW DO YOU RELATE TO A GAY FAY MEMBER?
- HOW TO BE AN OPENLY GAY CHRISTIAN
- CAN SOMEONE BE GAY AND CHRISTIAN? IS POSSIBLE TO BE A GAY CHRISTIAN?
- DO GOD LOVE ME EVEN IF I AM A GAY CHRISTIAN?
- FDG THE ‘ANTIDOTE’ TO MY UNSTABLE SENSE OF SELF AS A GAY, CHRISTIAN ‘BORRLE’
- HOW SHOULD CHRISTIANS RPOND TO GAY FRIENDS OR FAY MEMBERS?
- A CHRISTIAN RESPONSE AFTER A MONTH OF GAY PRIDE
- VICTOR CBOTA: “THE MORE I PRAYED, THE MORE I BEME AWARE THAT I AM GAY AND I WILL NEVER CHANGE”
- HUNTER BIN PROBE IRS WHISTLEBLOWER IS GAY DEMOCRAT: ‘I AM RISKG MY CAREER…’
- MY SON IS GAY
- A CHRISTIAN PERSPECTIVE ON PARENTG A GAY CHILD
10 REASONS GOD LOV GAY CHRISTIANS
When I started wrg my new book, God and the Gay Christian, I was well aware that Christians who oppose same-sex marriage the church have long ed the Bible to fend their pot of view. As a gay Christian om an evangelil church Kansas, that stat quo has had a damagg impact on my life, which is one reason I'm settg out to change the flty perspective. Here are 10 reasons why God accepts gay Christians. * i am a christian and i am gay *
Some morn Bible translatns say that “homosexuals” will not her the kgdom of God, but neher the ncept nor the word for people wh exclive same-sex attractn existed before the late 19th century. Requirg that all gay people rema celibate is at odds wh the Bible’s teachgs on celibacy, which are ground Scripture’s re affirmatn that God’s physil creatn is good. Matthew V is the thor of God and the Gay Christian and is the founr of The Reformatn Project, a Bible-based non-prof anizatn that seeks to reform church teachg on sexual orientatn and genr inty.
The world tells you that you have two choic: Accept that you’re gay and fd a way to be a gay Christian even though the Bible says not to, or be alone and lonely forever.
“HELP! I’M A GAY CHRISTIAN”
Gay and a Christian? * i am a christian and i am gay *
I thk that the reason gay people are so much pa isn’t bee the world hat gays and is homophobic, which is the polilly rrect explanatn you get the days, but ’s bee somethg went wrong and ’s paful not to be able to relate rrectly and healthily to people of the oppose sex. She is a equent speaker for MOPS (Mothers of Pre-Schoolers) and Stonecroft Mistri (Christian Women's Connectns), and serv on the board of Livg Hope Mistri, a Christ-centered outreach to those alg wh unwanted homosexualy.
SHOULD CHRISTIANS “DISOWN” GAY SONS AND DGHTERS?
"I'm OK - You're OK." That tchy tle is repeated oftentim to this day unselg parents how to handle a son or dghter revealg they are gay or lbian. "Don't be judgmental. Convey unndnal love. Accept them as they are. Realize they're born this way. Reassure them you're okay and they're okay whatever sexual inty they choose." * i am a christian and i am gay *
Whether or not a gay son, dghter, or other fay member lls him or herself a Christian, Christians should love them as fay members, even as we lovgly ny them membership a church, should they want .
Generally speakg, however, a parent faced wh any host of suatnal dilemmas surroundg homosexualy mt work to fulfill the two prcipl at once: affirm that that son or dghter is loved and don’t do anythg to support or affirm the s. It’s particularly immature and manipulative, then, when so many progrsive wrers—both those who do and don’t reprent themselv as Christians—acce Christian parents of beg rponsible for prsn and patterns of self-harm that velop gay children.
It’s not like an eleven-year old who feels pletely nfint mom and dad’s love turns twelve or thirteen, tells mom and dad he’s gay, listens to them object morally but experienc their ntued affirmatn of him otherwise, will then ci that they don’t fact love him and try to hurt himself. His unbiblil thkg is typil of sr our culture addn to fluential policians, advice lumnists, celebri, talk-show hosts, sports figur, famo sgers, tors, unselors and even misters affirm and celebrate dividuals of all ag who are "urageo and hont to e out" as gay, lbian, transgenr or bisexual. Ltle children are featured YouTube vios, DVDs and books like It's Perfectly Normal (more than 1 ln pi prt) that are ed schools across Ameri to te and nvce children om krgarten up that 's okay to be gay.
WHAT WOULD YOU DO IF YOUR CHILD SAID, 'I'M GAY'?
Achgly personal stori – parents losg their gay son, Christians losg their jobs fah-based anizatns after g out – are promptg some groups to reexame their discrimatory posns on... * i am a christian and i am gay *
Workshops and semar ssns were held to lay out plans for ntug to tablish gay clubs every school, promote "Days of Silence" to stifle negative ments, and more effectively dissemate rmatn to te as well as spire youth on the LGBT full urt propaganda prs is unprecented and of epic proportns. It is g at our children om schools, media and polil realms, cludg the proment placement of gay, lbian, bisexual and transgenr people TV, mic and pound the suatn, we have fluential misters who their church, on rad, TV and terviews downplay the entire gay issue and se explag 's not really part of their mistry.
Hoton's lbian mayor jt passed a law makg all public bathrooms, showers and drsg rooms totally accsible to eher sex, any molter, gay, lbian, bisexual or transgenr person unr the guise of "elimatg discrimatn.
I AM A GAY CHRISTIAN
Should a Christian have gay iends? What should be the relatnship between Christians and homosexuals? * i am a christian and i am gay *
"Here's the al: People of fah mt awaken to the monic schem to stroy marriage and fay Ameri while not beg surprised that more and more children and youth are entertag monilly planted thoughts: "I'm gay" or "Am I gay? If the openns is there ('s advisable to go dad wh son/ mom wh dghter) gently go further to quire about origs, fantasi, gay pornography, equentg gay bars and hangg wh gay iends. I am Ronald Moore, and like all of , I am the sum of many parts—a native of Detro, graduate of Michigan State Universy, member of Kappa Alpha Psi Fraterny, Hewlett Packard retiree, vout Christian member of The Riversi Church of New York, proud Ain Amerin, and a proud gay man.
JACKSONVILLE JAGUARS ASSISTANT KEV MAXEN BE FIRST MALE ACH MAJOR U.S. PRO LEAGUE TO E OUT AS GAY
On My Honor sger Drew Jtice has e out a new blog, where he not only matas his fah (“I am gay, and I am a Christian”), but challeng the opn that the two nnot go hand hand (“So, why is that so many assert that people have to be one or the […] * i am a christian and i am gay *
Wright, her cisn now go to the school board, which will discs the book challenge at s Monday meetg agenda and vote on a cisn on Tallahassee mom who submted the challenge, Katie Lyons, said her dghter, then a send grar at a lol elementary school, brought home the children's book about Kg, a tennis legend who is gay — and also brought qutns to her mother about a page regardg Kg's sexual orientatn. “It is important that be ma clear that this book was challenged not bee the book mentns Billie Jean Kg is gay, ” Lyons told the school board at a meetg last week. Beg gay means that if you're a girl, you love and have romantic feelgs for other girls — and if you're a boy, you love and have romantic feelgs for other boys.
‘I AM A GAY CHRISTIAN’: DEBAT ABOUT LGBTQ ACCEPTANCE ROIL SEATTLE-AREA NONPROFS, CHURCH
Is possible to be a gay Christian? Can a te Christian to be a practicg and unrepentant homosexual? * i am a christian and i am gay *
"Lyons matas the book is ntrary to state law, largely cg the Parental Rights Edutn Act, dubbed "Don't Say Gay" by crics, which prohibs stctn on sexual orientatn or genr inty book challenge law:Florida schools stggle to apply new book law which even Shakpeare is 'spect'Why 's beg challenged:Tallahassee mom mak se that 'I am Billie Jean Kg' book 'g' on parents' rightsWright, her July 10 remendatn, unters that the book isn’t ed as “stctn” and poted to a clarifitn the Florida Department of Edutn issued statg that "cintal referenc" books to LGBTQ people are not also said a new law, HB 1069, directed each school district to adopt procs allowg parents to lim their child’s accs to library material. "The excln of one of the profil jt bee of the intifitn of the ma subject as homosexual is not the tentn of any law or statute passed by the Florida Legislature, " Syett Lyons said the parental book review procs is not enough to screen qutnable materials accsible to their stunts.
Achgly personal stori – parents losg their gay son, Christians losg their jobs fah-based anizatns after g out – are promptg some groups to reexame their discrimatory posns on sexualy and genr. Often, said Matthias Roberts, the Belltown host of a podst lled “Queerology” aimed at gay Christians, relig lears who announce they support LGBTQ rights “all of a sudn lose everythg.
RAISG A GAY TEEN: WHEN FAH, FAY AND SEXUALY LLI
Are you qutng your sexualy? Fd out if you’re gay, straight, bisexual, or asexual. Learn what the terms mean and if they apply to you. * i am a christian and i am gay *
“We didn’t have any words around the theology, ” Lda Robertson said as she reunted how she and her hband stopped tryg to change their gay son as the teenager scend to spair and dg addictn. Though he said CRISTA will give aid to anyone regardls of sexual orientatn, he would not answer directly when asked whether gays uld serve as board members or employe.
SHOULD A CHRISTIAN HAVE GAY IENDS?
Beg open about your sexual orientatn should be as easy as breathg, but realy, tak nsc effort and a ltle practice. First, nsir what the Bible says about gay love, and tly ci if that is the path you wish to... * i am a christian and i am gay *
After World Visn’s almost immediate about-face, Stearns acknowledged an unspecified number of nceled donatn pledg and the “lovg” unsel some had offered that acceptg gay marriage “was simply not nsistent … wh the thory of Scripture. “LGBTQ Christians are asked to leave their jobs at Christian anizatns every week, ” said Matthew V, a 28-year-old Kansan whose 2014 book, “God and the Gay Christian, ” helped reigne the ll for a more acceptg theology.
But that realizatn me years later, after they had taken him to Christian unselors and a meetg of Exod Internatnal, a group voted to enuragg gay Christians to overe their sir. Raisg a gay child has tght her the six years sce 19-year-old Eri Duclos looked to her mother's ey and spoke openly about her sexualy, Bent has fought fear, endured qutns about God and grace, and stggled toward lov her dghter, and she lov her God. "You jt wa, " Bent dated boys bee that's what she thought she was supposed to, one day middle school, she learned what "gay" don't remember the tails of the disvery — she thks the rmatn me om the "terrible kids" who ro the b wh her — but sudnly she reached an unrstandg of liked girls, and that attractn had a was gay.
"I AM GAY, AND I AM A CHRISTIAN." ON MY HONOR SGER OUT, POSTS BLOG
Can someone be gay and Christian? Is possible to be a gay Christian? Can you be a Christian and stggle wh homosexualy? * i am a christian and i am gay *
"She said she uld set up class for me and put me through a Bible study to teach me how to be un-gay, " Duclos was such a parture om the embrace she formerly felt om her fah played bass as part of her church's youth group band.
IS POSSIBLE TO BE A GAY CHRISTIAN?
A man livg wh borrle personaly disorr (BPD) discs his stggle wh his unstable inty, or sense of self, between havg BPD, and beg both Christian and gay. * i am a christian and i am gay *
Jt like John Piper is a new creature Christ, even though he still stggl wh the ss of impatience, lt, and pri, Christians who stggle wh homosexual sir are not homosexuals. It don't mean that those feelgs go away entirely, but many time are able to enjoy heterosexual liv or liv of ntented, chaste sglens spe a history of homosexual s. On My Honor sger Drew Jtice has e out a new blog, where he not only matas his fah (“I am gay, and I am a Christian”), but challeng the opn that the two nnot go hand hand (“So, why is that so many assert that people have to be one or the other—gay OR Christian?
” The ontman did ment that he uld not “support the homosexual agenda our natn, ” sayg he has “never heard a homosexual uple tell (him) that the reason they are together is bee, out of a place of votn to the Lord prayer and scripture study, (The Lord) mand them to be together.
AM I GAY?
The month of June marked a month-long celebratn of Gay Pri. The qutn we should be askg ourselv as Christians is “How do I rpond?” We live * i am a christian and i am gay *
Do not be ceived; neher fornitors, nor idolaters, nor adulterers, nor effemate, nor homosexuals, nor thiev, nor the veto, nor dnkards, nor revilers, nor swdlers, will her the kgdom of God” (1 Corthians 6:9-10).
While is unniable, biblilly speakg, that homosexualy is immoral and unnatural (Romans 1:26-27), no sense do the Bible scribe homosexualy as an unfivable s. If the phrase “gay Christian” refers to a person who actively, perpetually, and unrepentantly liv a homosexual liftyle – no, is not possible for such a person to tly be a Christian. Gay - While this adjective has historilly scribed men who are attracted to other men, the term now is ed to refer to anyone who experienc romantic, emotnal, or physil attractn to people of the same genr.
HOW DO YOU RELATE TO A GAY FAY MEMBER?
Bee Christ drank the full cup of God’s wrath on your behalf (Romans 5:8–9; 1 Peter 3:18), you will never experience even a moment of judgment om God over your homosexual sir, or over anythg else. We believe that homosexual unns are nsistent wh God’s sign for human sexualy as set forth the openg pag of the Bible and the words of J Himself: “From the begng of creatn, God ma them male and female.
HOW TO BE AN OPENLY GAY CHRISTIAN
If they brg up I Corthians 6:9 or I Timothy 1:10, tell them the translatn of the Greek words "malakos" and "arsenoko" as "gay" is ntroversial, as that meang was rare when the words were most mon.
In fact, Pl's list clus, "the sexually immoral, nor idolaters, nor adulterers, nor men who practice homosexualy, nor thiev, nor the greedy, nor dnkards, nor revilers, nor swdlers" (1 Corthians 6:9-10). For every verse that anti-LGBTQ Christians say nmns homosexualy, there are a dozen that clearly nmn somethg we support or support somethg we nmn (which isn’t to say that those passag even do nmn queer people). I have a nfsn to make to you: sometim, when I lay bed on particularly rtls nights (ually when I’ve stayed up way too late and had way too many Pepsis) I stare at the ceilg and ntemplate eher (a) the vastns and meangls of the Universe or (b) “what if they are right and is a s to be gay???
CAN SOMEONE BE GAY AND CHRISTIAN? IS POSSIBLE TO BE A GAY CHRISTIAN?
But somehow, I had a belief beyond what I uld see and when I was trouble or urgently wanted somethg, I plea-prayed to I was sent away to boardg school aged 13 and immediately bullied on spicn of beg gay, I need somethg greater than jt my own strength and flh to survive.
I accepted this teachg uncrilly and tried my very harst to reorient myself through diligent prayer and scriptural study, and later through attempts at gay reparative would be a mistake to see my Christian inty only pejoratively. I took a step away om the evangelil Anglin church I grew up and sought out affirmg gay church wh their more acceptg theology while keepg ti wh my clost Christian iends.
Here, all the gay feelgs I had been reprsg all my life, all the abandonment I was antilly avoidg, uld no longer be held would take two more years, two hospal stays and three treatg psychiatrists before I fally found the therapist who unrstood me, thereby succsfully diagnosg me wh BPD.
DO GOD LOVE ME EVEN IF I AM A GAY CHRISTIAN?
Most new people I meet now are aghast that I was my late 30s when I fally stated the, right om my childhood, I was tght to hate beg gay through rogatory labels leadg me to reject .
When me too much I ran away, even nng away for a year to the end, I uldn’t n om beg gay forever sce I have, for most of my life, been an hont person but wh one piece of the honty jigsaw missg.
I thk whout my mental illns, perhaps I would be still nng om beg gay bee when the acceptance me, was soon after my BPD first acceptance me at the premiere of my iend’s 2015 film, “Holdg the Man, ” a great and endurg Atralian gay love story. ” The day that I would not allow myself to ever experience had fally would take a year or two to be able to fortably scribe myself as gay to others, but by the time I started DBT at the end of 2016, I was tellg my group members that beg gay was an important part of who I am.
FDG THE ‘ANTIDOTE’ TO MY UNSTABLE SENSE OF SELF AS A GAY, CHRISTIAN ‘BORRLE’
The ma problem between my gay and Christian inti was believg they were an all-or-nothg, black and whe mutual exclivy; eher 100% Christian and 0% gay or 0% Christian and 100% many years, I believed the scriptural nmnatns of homosexualy end the discsn or possibily of havg a gay, Christian inty, but I no longer accept this. As my iend Matthew V pots out his book God and the Gay Christian, mandg celibacy is at odds wh the biblil perspective that celibacy is a gift, not a mandate. For me, mandg that the only way you n be gay and be Christian is to be celibate is the equivalent of qutng God’s wisdom, and that seems like a ls-than-wise thg to do.
HOW SHOULD CHRISTIANS RPOND TO GAY FRIENDS OR FAY MEMBERS?
Kaltenbach’s unique story is tailed his new book Msy Grace: How a Pastor wh Gay Parents Learned to Love Others Whout Sacrificg Convictn and land him on the ont page of the New York Tim June. ’07) is the lead pastor at Disvery Church Simi Valley, Calif., and the thor of Msy Grace: How a Pastor wh Gay Parents Learned to Love Others Whout Sacrificg Convictn. One of the keynote speakers at the piic, Stephen Black, lived an active homosexual liftyle for eight years before givg his heart to Christ and turng om that liftyle.
When Christians buy to the lie that to speak out agast the homosexual liftyle is “tolerant” “hateful” or “judgmental, ” realy they have been silenced agast speakg up for pury, righteons and godls.
A CHRISTIAN RESPONSE AFTER A MONTH OF GAY PRIDE
When I nfsed to my prit about my sexual orientatn, he was perplexed and told me this is unual for a Romanian bee homosexualy is rather specific to foreigners.
”Sce I me out as a gay person of fah a very homophobic ntext, durg the antigay referendum mpaign Romania 2018, people wh different relig backgrounds have started to approach me privately through social media.
Durg one of the regular weekly class at the Seventh Day Adventist Theologil Instute somebody asked our teacher, who happened to be also a pastor, about his opn on homosexualy.
VICTOR CBOTA: “THE MORE I PRAYED, THE MORE I BEME AWARE THAT I AM GAY AND I WILL NEVER CHANGE”
More than that, the prevly mentned homophobic referendum meant to ban gay marriag our Constutn, me as a rult of a cizenship iative massively driven and supported by Orthodox, Catholic and Evangelil church who found a mon fertile ground of llaboratn homophobia.
HUNTER BIN PROBE IRS WHISTLEBLOWER IS GAY DEMOCRAT: ‘I AM RISKG MY CAREER…’
Wright, her remendatn.The cisn now go to the school board, which will discs the book challenge at s Monday meetg agenda and vote on a cisn on Tuday.The Tallahassee mom who submted the challenge, Katie Lyons, said her dghter, then a send grar at a lol elementary school, brought home the children's book about Kg, a tennis legend who is gay — and also brought qutns to her mother about a page regardg Kg's sexual orientatn.“It is important that be ma clear that this book was challenged not bee the book mentns Billie Jean Kg is gay,” Lyons told the school board at a meetg last week.
Regardls of orientatn, homosexual or heterosexual, the topic of sexual orientatn is not age-appropriate or velopmentally-appropriate for elementary stunts.” Yet, her plat, filed on April 25, Lyons was more specific wh her ncerns than jt "sexual orientatn," a term broadly referrg to whom one is attracted to."I object to material that discs beg gay and what means to be gay," wrote Lyons.The page drawg the challenge reads: "Around this time, I realized I was gay.
Beg gay means that if you're a girl, you love and have romantic feelgs for other girls — and if you're a boy, you love and have romantic feelgs for other boys."Lyons matas the book is ntrary to state law, largely cg the Parental Rights Edutn Act, dubbed "Don't Say Gay" by crics, which prohibs stctn on sexual orientatn or genr inty schools.New book challenge law:Florida schools stggle to apply new book law which even Shakpeare is 'spect'Why 's beg challenged:Tallahassee mom mak se that 'I am Billie Jean Kg' book 'g' on parents' rightsWright, her July 10 remendatn, unters that the book isn’t ed as “stctn” and poted to a clarifitn the Florida Department of Edutn issued statg that "cintal referenc" books to LGBTQ people are not prohibed.Wright also said a new law, HB 1069, directed each school district to adopt procs allowg parents to lim their child’s accs to library material.“This seems to be a reasonable approach bee grants parents the means to rtrict accs to material they fd objectnable while grantg accs to children of parents who fd the material acceptable,” she said.In a June hearg about the challenge, Shane Syett, assistant supertennt of amic servic for Leon County Schools, said the school system would be implementg the new procs for the upg 2023-2024 school year to allow parents to approve readg material before their children check them out."The excln of one of the profil jt bee of the intifitn of the ma subject as homosexual is not the tentn of any law or statute passed by the Florida Legislature," Syett said.But Lyons said the parental book review procs is not enough to screen qutnable materials accsible to their stunts."Havg accs to the book tl and readg reviews do not allow parents to fully screen the ntent of the book; would be easy to miss cril and potentially harmful material," Lyons said last week.This is the first time Florida's pal cy school district has gone through the book challenge procs after Gov. Backstory and ntext: I am a 24 year old gay man who has never been raised relig but my parents believed god to an extent (I also had some slightly more relig fay who said thgs like “don’t say gods name va” and such).
MY SON IS GAY
Wh gay marriage makg headl around the world, parents are lookg for helpful ways to intify wh children, iends, and fay members who intify as homosexual or same-sex attracted. Statg that homosexualy is a choice n make perfect sense to those of not alg wh the issue, but for those the church today who are tryg to figure out why they are havg same-sex attractns, I n see how uld be hugely trimental and create far more pa than hope and healg.
If our words are drivg our sons and dghters toward those the gay muny who "better unrstand" their stggl, then I believe we are also beg ceived about the way God would sire we share the gospel.
I feel like many dividuals the church who are stgglg wh homosexualy tend to feel that their only optns are to hi the tense battle they're wagg ternally, move to the gay muny for acceptance, or m suici. From what I'm told, there are many the church, like my son, who say they have homosexual attractns, but are choosg not to act on that s and stead, to live a chaste life servg the Lord. Jordan has shared several horrible stori about stunts he has known om Christian hom—some wh parents mistry—who have been beaten and abed by their parents when they tried to talk wh them about beg gay.
A CHRISTIAN PERSPECTIVE ON PARENTG A GAY CHILD
My hband wisely unseled me to only share Jordan's revelatn wh a tsted and select few, so that if his homosexualy ed others to treat him differently, me om him sayg somethg and not . If they see firsthand how the Lord giv the power and abily to rpond to their homosexualy wh passn and love, rather than anger and abe as they may have expected, then maybe that example will empower them to believe that he n help them change as well. " To read more about Rachel and Jordan's journey, read CT article "Hope for the Gay Unrgrad, " and for the story of one lbian's life-changg transformatn, "My Tra-Wreck Conversn.