The fact no one lik to adm: many gay men uld jt have easily been straight | The Spectator

Contents:

• HOW DO YOU KNOW IF YOU’RE GAY, STRAIGHT, OR SOMETHG BETWEEN?
• IS IT POSSIBLE TO SYSTEMATILLY TURN GAY PEOPLE STRAIGHT?
• CAN SCTN MAKE STRAIGHT MEN GAY?
• CAN SOME GAY MEN AND LBIANS CHANGE THEIR SEXUAL ORIENTATN? 200 PARTICIPANTS REPORTG A CHANGE OM HOMOSEXUAL TO HETEROSEXUAL ORIENTATN
• THE GAY-O-METER! ?️‍? LGBTQ QUIZ
• HOW DO I KNOW I’M NOT REALLY GAY/STRAIGHT?
• I TRIED TO NVERT MYSELF OM GAY TO STRAIGHT. IT DON’T WORK
• MEET THE STRAIGHT MEN WHO ARE TERRIFIED THEY ARE GAY
• KEV SPACEY: I N’T TELL WHETHER MEN ARE GAY JT BY LOOKG AT THEM
• SOME GAYS CAN GO STRAIGHT, STUDY SAYS
• HOW TO KNOW IF YOU ARE GAY
• ‘I AM GAY – BUT I WASN’T BORN THIS WAY’
• THE FACT NO ONE LIK TO ADM: MANY GAY MEN ULD JT HAVE EASILY BEEN STRAIGHT
• IS MY HBAND GAY? SIGNS OF A GAY HBAND

HOW DO YOU KNOW IF YOU’RE GAY, STRAIGHT, OR SOMETHG BETWEEN?

” Plenty of people thought they were one thg for the first half of their life, only to fd that wasn’t ’s also possible to thk you’re gay when you’re actually bi, or thk you’re bi when you’re actually gay, for example.

IS IT POSSIBLE TO SYSTEMATILLY TURN GAY PEOPLE STRAIGHT?

"If [a patient] n accept his bodily homoerotic experience while stayg nnected to the therapist, " he wrote The Paradox of Self-Acceptance, "the sexual feelg soon transforms to somethg else: the regnn of eper, pa-generated emotnal needs which have nothg to do wh sexualy. The few that did have "high-qualy" evince "show that endurg change to an dividual's sexual orientatn is unmon, " and that treatments tend to change sexual orientatn may e harm, cludg prsn and mental Dark AgHomosexualy was officially labeled a mental illns the U.

CAN SCTN MAKE STRAIGHT MEN GAY?

Another method was satiatn therapy, which a subject was told to masturbate over and over while verbally scribg his homosexual fantasi, until they disappeared — or, at least, "therapi" were generally effective — the person remaed attracted to the same sex — or over-effective — the person was trmatized and lost all sexual aroal entirely.

CAN SOME GAY MEN AND LBIANS CHANGE THEIR SEXUAL ORIENTATN? 200 PARTICIPANTS REPORTG A CHANGE OM HOMOSEXUAL TO HETEROSEXUAL ORIENTATN

They "were ed whout people thkg about whether they were humane, " Glassgold all treatments were so gome: Lnel Ovey, a Columbia Universy psychoanalyst and thor of Homosexualy and Psdohomosexualy, created a behavral method the 1960s. " His view mirrored the belief of many clicians at the time: that homosexualy was based on a phobia of the oppose non-aversive treatments followg this theory foced on buildg "tnal skills" like datg techniqu, assertivens trag, and affectn achg to crease teractns wh women. The evince that the men experienced a genue change sexual preference, shows that life-long, exclive homosexualy, as articulated by gay rhetoric, is more a statement about the culture which occurs than the "sence" of homosexualy.

THE GAY-O-METER! ?️‍? LGBTQ QUIZ

Posn statements of the major mental health anizatns the Uned Stat state that there is no scientific evince that a homosexual sexual orientatn n be changed by psychotherapy, often referred to as "reparative therapy. Eher some gay men and lbians, followg reparative therapy, actually change their predomantly homosexual orientatn to a predomantly heterosexual orientatn or some gay men and women nstct elaborate self-ceptive narrativ (or even lie) which they claim to have changed their sexual orientatn, or both. When I was young, I was told the whole world was divid to heterosexual men and heterosexual women, bar a small number of unfortunate ‘homosexuals’ of both genrs and possibly an even smaller number a third tegory, ‘bisexuals’, who ‘swung both ways’; pl, fally, a ty band of wretched creatur who were physilly not que one thg or the other.

He found that almost half his male terviewe had reacted sexually to both genrs; more than a third had had a homosexual enunter; and more than one ten reported roughly equally strong sexual rpons to both men and women.

HOW DO I KNOW I’M NOT REALLY GAY/STRAIGHT?

I'd like to believe jt happens, if you don’t re about belongg to any kd of muny-based stereotyp (“gay turned straight” stereotyp clud) or if you don’t feel the need to jtify or fend who you happen to be at this moment. I believe that people only bee one of the gays om their society for stance if you are a boy who study a boy school you meet only boys and you start learng thgs you like about boy mak you have a sire to want boys e that's what you only see, but if you are other society and you see both girls and boys you might like girls better than boy pends on the suatn whether you are om a fay wh like only raise om a mother that mak you take your mother's personaly and mak you have a angle of a women to like men.

Another thg about turng straight to gay is also possible I have been dog rearch and the rult is that there are a gay webse which tak a vio of straight people dog stuff together by payg them a expensive price to do the job.

I do believe that if a gay person do sudnly turn to the oppose sex, that they really were jt nfed to their sexual orientatn om the start, and that their te nature fally took over, and they uld not ny once they disvered who they tly were.

I TRIED TO NVERT MYSELF OM GAY TO STRAIGHT. IT DON’T WORK

” Some people’s doubts are further plited by havg such experienc as hearg other people talkg or lookg their directn and thkg that the people mt be analyzg their behavr or appearance and talkg about them – discsg how they mt be gay (or straight). I have sometim wonred if those who experience the most distrs om such thoughts as the do so bee they were raised wh more strongly homophobic or anti-gay attus to beg wh, or if is simply bee one’s sexualy n be such a basic doubt.

The basels claim that chemils – particularly tap water – uld turn people gay has gaed populary wh nspiracy theorists over the years, most memorably wh nservative rad host Alex Jon, who said chemils the water were “turng the igg’ ogs gay.

MEET THE STRAIGHT MEN WHO ARE TERRIFIED THEY ARE GAY

This was regular, sual and normal: every lson I’d ever imbibed about homosexualy was that was I’d grown up watchg a fundamentalist Christian show, The Donut Club, which preached, a creepy kids’ song, how “life whout God’s love is like a donut, ’e there’s a hole the middle of your heart”. Wow you have no ia what's is like to be gay, so homophobic- many people fd that their sexual orientatn isn't a sire and 's always been there sce birth jt people like you tell everyone that heterosexualy is normal so people mentally and emotnally even physilly tell themselv to love the oppose sex until they realise a plited and paful procs if who they really are: heterosexual or not...

Ok no to your first statement the reason a 'gay' person would like girls more do not disprove the born gay theory, this day of age the straight liftyle is naturally phed apon everyone, so you would assume you like girls at first, until around when you h puberty, you start realizg you don't like the oppose genr, and those social nstcts fa off for the most part. How God new he would be before he created him, which is how they all seem to have the munal agreement (the try of god) that homosexually as well as heterosexualy or any other sexual orientatn is of equal value and qualy and all serve huy, bee tth be told if anythg matters then all thgs matters.

And you my ed don't hurt yoelf, don't build your happs om s of other people (they are as cluels as you are about the wrongs and rights between the two sexuali) some of are hetero and some of are homo 's natural nform and embrace yours and always rpect the one's your not. If you were born as a man, then you are a man unls the doctor prove the oppose, you are an Atheist، i dont know about Atheist but as a mlim my relign lead me to a straight path Healthily, mentally and spirually،So for s not an optn for people om the same genr to have sex wh each other This is the e of many diseas as disverd, now how we protect our selv as our relign tght ,, we simply dont watch porn, thats your half way to beg straight, i also advice you that you dont not have gay sex anymore, if you havnt tried yet stay that way?

KEV SPACEY: I N’T TELL WHETHER MEN ARE GAY JT BY LOOKG AT THEM

He rried out the same tt almost every night for the next three weeks, always wh the same searchg Inter mental health foms for answers to his private impasse, Darren beme nvced that he was sufferg om 'HOCD': a not officially regnised form of Obssive Compulsive Disorr fed by the fear of beg or beg homosexual. While he asserts that 'HOCD', an acronym ed by sufferers sharg their stori onle, isn't officially classified the Diagnostic and Statistil Manual of Mental Disorrs (DSM), he says that the irratnal fear of beg or beg gay falls firmly wh the umbrella of Obssive Compulsive Disorr.

Nowadays, the majory of tablished OCD chari – cludg OCDUK, OCDActn and Md - addrs tsive sexual thoughts as a mon trope of the disorr, but that has done ltle to stem a backlash om some high-profile skeptics wh the psychologil muny, who believe that HOCD is at bt misguid, and at worst homophobia s most pernic guise. "My psychologist jt looked bored and hand me a leaflet"In November 2015, BuzzFeed UK's LGBT edor Patrick Stdwick published an article tled '"World's Leadg Anxiety Expert" Offers Treatment For People Who Worry That They're Gay' that heavily cricised the practice of a Harley Street therapist named Charl Ln who, acrdg to the se, boasted of a "100% succs rate" the treatment of "HOCD" the time the article was wrten, Ln's publishers were dubbg him as "the world's leadg thory on anxiety", and his webse ma hefty promis to sexually-nfed OCD sufferers.

SOME GAYS CAN GO STRAIGHT, STUDY SAYS

"If you are experiencg HOCD … and the thoughts , " the se read, "you are not gay and when you do my Method to elimate this and your other anxieti you'll fd out why you thk you might be and why you certaly are NOT! Elizabeth Peel, chair of the Brish Psychologil Society's 'Psychology of Sexuali' sectn and a profsor of Communitn & Social Interactn at Loughborough Universy, stat wh the piece that: "The term 'Homosexual OCD' is simply nversn therapy unr another guise and somethg we strongly nmn as damagg. And an age where even the Vice Print of the Uned Stat has exprsed tac support for the practice, 's unrstandable that high profile figur the psychologil muny would nmn anythg that uld fuel the rhetoric of homophobic 'therapists', or provi party-le approval of their methods.

"Rose Bretécher believ the accatn HOCD is jt 'ternalised homophobia' is rrect, but don't blame anyone for leapg to such a ncln: "People's unrstandg is only as good as the rmatn available out there – and awarens is still pretty poor.

"Over the years, therapists here […] have treated many homosexuals (male and female) who are plagued by obssive fears of beg "straight", and who suffer equally when OCD attacks their sexual inty, " stat their webse, which also offers an onle HOCD tt. Osr-wng actor Kev Spacey has said he is attracted to mascule men but is not able to tell whether someone is gay jt by lookg at cross-examatn durg his trial on sex abe charg, the Hollywood star nied he was a “sexual bully” and told the jury he did not have a “power wand” to make people want to sleep wh about his sexual preferenc, Mr Spacey said he had prevly had romantic enunters wh men who would not scribe themselv as homosexual.

HOW TO KNOW IF YOU ARE GAY

Some people thk of themselv as straight even if they ocsnally feel attracted to (or have even had relatnships wh) people of the same genr, and some people nsir themselv gay even if they have felt some attractn to/had relatnships wh people of another genr. Crics, though, say the study's subjects may be ludg themselv and that the subject group was scientifilly valid bee many of them were referred by anti-gay relig Robert Spzer, a psychiatry profsor at Columbia Universy, said he began his study as a skeptic — believg, as major mental health anizatns do, that sexual orientatn nnot be changed, and attempts to do so n even e Spzer's study, which has not yet been published or reviewed, seems to dite otherwise. Spzer says he spoke to 143 men and 57 women who say they changed their orientatn om gay to straight, and nclud that 66 percent of the men and 44 percent of women reached what he lled good heterosexual functng — a staed, lovg heterosexual relatnship wh the past year and gettg enough emotnal satisfactn to rate at least a seven on a 10-pot said those who changed their orientatn had satisfyg heterosexual sex at least monthly and never or rarely thought of someone of the same sex durg also found that 89 percent of men and 95 percent of women were bothered not at all or only slightly by unwanted homosexual feelgs.

‘I AM GAY – BUT I WASN’T BORN THIS WAY’

Spzer argu that highly motivated gays n fact change that preference — wh a lot of Study, Old DebateBut crics have challenged the study, even before was formally unveiled at today's ssn of the Amerin Psychiatric Associatn's annual meetg New Orleans, which was jammed wh televisn meras reportg on the prentatn. "In fact, he said, many of his subjects had been sponnt and even suicidal themselv, for the oppose reason — "precisely bee they had prevly thought there was no hope for them, and they had been told by many mental health profsnals that there was no hope for them, they had to jt learn to live wh their homosexual feelgs.

"The sample is terrible, totally tated, totally unreprentative of the gay and lbian muny, " said David Ellt, a spokman for the Natnal Gay and Lbian Task Force Spzer says while the people his sample were unual — more relig than the general populatn — don't mean their experienc n be dismissed.

THE FACT NO ONE LIK TO ADM: MANY GAY MEN ULD JT HAVE EASILY BEEN STRAIGHT

"Conservative, anti-gay, anti-diversy folks are gog to embrace and they're gonna e for their own agenda to ph their pot of view that, y, you don't need equaly Amerin society for gay people bee they n change, " he said. "But Spzer — who scribed himself as a "Jewish, atheist, secular humanist" wh no axe to grd — says maybe there are gays who are happy beg gay and ex-gays who are happy beg straight, and that both sis serve more rpect. You so obvly nnot be gay, was her implitn, bee this is good was 2006, a full five years before Lady Gaga would set the Born This Way argument atop s unassailable cultural perch, but even then the popular unrstandg of orientatn was that was somethg you were born wh, somethg you uldn’t change.

But what feels most accurate to say is that I’m gay – but I wasn’t born this people may fd their sir changg directn - and n't jt be explaed as experimentatn (Cred: Ignac Lehmann)In 1977, jt over 10% of Amerins thought gayns was somethg you were born wh, acrdg to Gallup.

Throughout the same perd, the number of Amerins who believe homosexualy is “due to someone’s upbrgg/environment” fell om jt unr 60% to ias reached cril mass pop culture, first wh Lady Gaga’s 2011 Born This Way and one year later wh Macklemore’s Same Love, the chos of which has a gay person sgg “I n’t change even if I tried, even if I wanted to.

IS MY HBAND GAY? SIGNS OF A GAY HBAND

” Around the same time, the Human Rights Campaign clared unequivolly that “Beg gay is not a choice, ” and to claim that is “giv unwarranted crence to roundly disproven practic such as nversn or reparative therapy. ”People who challenge the Born This Way narrative are often st as homophobic, and their thkg is nsired backwardAs Jane Ward not Not Gay: Sex Between Straight Whe Men, what’s tertg about many of the claims is how transparent their speakers are wh their polil motivatns.