I like guys but I don’t want to be gay. How do I stop beg gay? – The Answer Wall

Contents:

• ANDREW WHE (BUT NOT IN A GAY WAY)
• I LIKE GUYS BUT I DON’T WANT TO BE GAY. HOW DO I STOP BEG GAY?
• CAN SOMEONE BE HOMOSEXUAL AND NOT GAY?
• I LOVE YOU, MAN. BUT, DU, SO NOT A GAY WAY
• HOW DO I KNOW I’M NOT REALLY GAY/STRAIGHT?
• 'S NOT GAY IF YOU'RE UNRWAY

ANDREW WHE (BUT NOT IN A GAY WAY)

In his show, Andrew Whe talks about how he was que late to e out as gay, pared to others of his generatn. So he is performg his first LGBT-based edy route wh several goals md, but the ma one, is to bee a gay in.

I LIKE GUYS BUT I DON’T WANT TO BE GAY. HOW DO I STOP BEG GAY?

Growg up Salisbury, he did not have many opportuni to experience gay culture, or to see accurate portrayals of same-sex relatnships. As is apparent some of his datg horror stori, ’s hard to meet gay men when you live sleepy, ral areas. The ntent of the show touch on some ser issu, which he talks about how he has tried to volve himself more the gay muny by takg part activism.

Jo the flamboyantly reprsed young stand-up as he tells stori of accintal i, BLM protts, chary shops and how they all kickstarted his ambn to bee a gay in (but not a gay way). Andrew Whe terviewBut Not a Gay Way is a llectn of some of my strongt rout om the last three years all shaped around the narrative of tryg to rever my stolen welli. It is very homogeneo/ hetero-normative and beg a tholic stutn is not the easit environment for queer stunts.

So when we therapists are nonted wh male clients, often married on, who e to wh ep nflicts about their sexual attractn to other men, we often fd that they are willg to e the word “homosexual, ” but chew the “gay” label.

CAN SOMEONE BE HOMOSEXUAL AND NOT GAY?

Bee “gay” impli an embracg of the gay liftyle — gay bars, gay pri paras, perhaps multiple sex partners, or even anonymo sex.

Unfortunately, much of our natn’s polics have long exacerbated the problem as well, shamg and vilifyg homosexualy, leadg legns of men stgglg wh sexual inty to ternalize their homophobia.

I warned them of the pfalls of keepg their sexual orientatn secret: a life of creased prsn, pursug a secret life the gay unrground wh the danger of beg ught, how attemptg to supprs urg n often e them to bee even more obssed wh them. I have treated many men who are of Mormon, Orthodox Jewish, Catholic, and other religns who thk of homosexualy as a pathology.

I LOVE YOU, MAN. BUT, DU, SO NOT A GAY WAY

Their pa is excciatg, but I honor their bravery riskg losg everythg to ensure they have a qualy life as a gay man.

HOW DO I KNOW I’M NOT REALLY GAY/STRAIGHT?

They may need, om time to time, to seek further therapy, but wh the right therapist, one who has thoroughly unrstood the dangers of such practic of “reparative therapy” which the therapist seeks to change the client’s sexual inty om gay to straight. Bee the labels “homosexual” or “gay” rry such a stigma, some of the men seek help for their “sex addictn” and see their homosexualy as an actg out of same-sex urg.

Beg homosexual, gay, or havg same-sex attractn is not sex addictn, and should never be treated as such. Perry is a make-out band and the characters Humpday feel the need to assure each other, "You're pretty solidly not gay.

"We sort of set up that the fn of masculy is to not be gay, " says Lisa Diamond, an associate profsor of psychology and genr studi at the Universy of Utah.

'S NOT GAY IF YOU'RE UNRWAY

"Livg a homophobic society may prevent boys om experimentg or, at the very least, talkg publicly about experimentg. It's a notn they n barely wrap their heads around, one they have to tegorize orr to e to grips one character says of the project, "It's beyond gay. Often ed to refer to asexual people  a siar manner as “gay” or “straight” are ed to refer to homosexual or heterosexual people.