PEACHY KEENAN: Everyone is gay, n you blame them? | Human Events |

Contents:

• GAY CONVERSN: I SLEPT WH OVER 200 MEN, NOW I'M A HAPPILY MARRIED HETEROSEXUAL DAD
• THE FACT NO ONE LIK TO ADM: MANY GAY MEN ULD JT HAVE EASILY BEEN STRAIGHT
• IS IT POSSIBLE TO SYSTEMATILLY TURN GAY PEOPLE STRAIGHT?
• HOW TO LEAD A HETEROSEXUAL LIFTYLE IF YOU ARE GAY
• PEACHY KEENAN: EVERYONE IS GAY, N YOU BLAME THEM?

GAY CONVERSN: I SLEPT WH OVER 200 MEN, NOW I'M A HAPPILY MARRIED HETEROSEXUAL DAD

Disregardg all evince that the ex-gay movement is credibly damagg to more than 90% of those who unrgo "treatment" (bee they clearly jt didn't believe God enough), Settg Captiv Free wants you to know that you were not "born this way. " Homosexualy is a s that you need to purge om your system, and the only way to do is to follow their three-parts-a-day the app is only downloadable om Google Play (iTun and the 69, 822+ people who petned them don't believe nversn therapy for some reason), there is an abridged versn available on the mistry’s webse.

THE FACT NO ONE LIK TO ADM: MANY GAY MEN ULD JT HAVE EASILY BEEN STRAIGHT

But Hont About Your S (But Not TOO Hont): Adm that you have homosexual tennci, but don’t say anythg else about . Stop Callg Your Homosexualy an "Alternative Liftyle": It's "Wicked, " "Evil, " and a "S": The are the only thgs you should ever ll om now on, preferably hhed ton.

Even better, feel ee to refer to your homosexualy wh water-based metaphors: It's a "broken cistern" that will never satisfy your thirst.

IS IT POSSIBLE TO SYSTEMATILLY TURN GAY PEOPLE STRAIGHT?

Change For the Right Reasons (the Glory Of God): After all, homosexualy is nothg but "lt, porn, and sexual immoraly, " ss that are applible only to gay people and never to straight on. Always Read Scripture, But Only the Parts We Tell You to: Who knew curg homosexualy uld be so much like dog high school homework?

Remove Yourself From Anythg Even Remotely Gay: Don't watch porn (aga, 's only a gay thg), don't go on gay webs, and most of all, certaly don't associate wh gay people. Any of those thgs might make you feel like your homosexualy is a natural part of your inty and n be accepted by those around you. Realize That Beg Homosexual Mak You Feel Alone Fet that we told you to shut yourself away om most of the world, and ignore the ia that maybe gay people feel so alone bee of the discrimatory and hateful attus that they face, helped by people like .

HOW TO LEAD A HETEROSEXUAL LIFTYLE IF YOU ARE GAY

Try not beg so gay.

PEACHY KEENAN: EVERYONE IS GAY, N YOU BLAME THEM?

Rencile Wh Those Who Tried to Help You Stop Beg Gay: All those people who lled you "faggot" and told you that you were gog to Hell? If you tly believe God and want to change your sful ways, God will remove all homosexual urg om your md.