Savage Love: It's harmls for a straight guy to tease gay guys for fun on Grdr | Geia Straight Vanuver’s source for arts, culture, and events

Contents:

• GAY MEN AND STRAIGHT MEN AS FRIENDS
• STEP-BY-STEP INSTCTNS FOR SHOOTG YOUR SHOT WH GAY GUYS
• LIVGTOPICSALL LIVGSAVAGE LOVETRAVELASTROLOGYFROM THE VLTHEALTHSTYLELGBT+SEX & ROMANCEBT OF VANUVERTRANSPORATNCARTOONSHOMELS VANUVER SAVAGE LOVE COLUMNSAVAGE LOVE: IT'S HARMLS FOR A STRAIGHT GUY TO TEASE GAY GUYS FOR FUN ON GRDR
• LIVGTOPICSALL LIVGSAVAGE LOVETRAVELASTROLOGYFROM THE VLTHEALTHSTYLELGBT+SEX & ROMANCEBT OF VANUVERTRANSPORATNCARTOONSHOMELS VANUVER SAVAGE LOVE COLUMNSAVAGE LOVE: IT'S HARMLS FOR A STRAIGHT GUY TO TEASE GAY GUYS FOR FUN ON GRDR
• HOW TO GET A MAN (FOR GAY MEN)
• CAN GAY AND STRAIGHT MEN REALLY BE FRIENDS?

GAY MEN AND STRAIGHT MEN AS FRIENDS

Straight/gay men, for a feature he's, I digrs. "I've ed other gay datg apps like Grdr and, when I ed to say that I was lookg for iendship, people would lgh at me. "Our mographic is primarily 'gay' and I thk most of the ers intify as 'gay' or 'bi', but, really, don’t matter.

I’ve even had people say that ’s homophobic. It jt don’t look like somethg that you would associate wh a tradnal ia of beg 'gay', but that’s jt another ia that someone else has created. After listeng to what Stt had to say and after speakg to some people on the app, I'm que sure this is primarily an app for gay or bi men.

That's not bee I'm a homophobe who don't want to be tarnished wh homosexualy.

STEP-BY-STEP INSTCTNS FOR SHOOTG YOUR SHOT WH GAY GUYS

"My random roommate durg sophomore year happened to be gay.

' His buddi got all homophobic on him, so he asked, 'You guys have never msed around wh another guy?

I'm gay, but I hooked up wh a handful of men and women my 30s. In the end, they're still straight, and I'm still gay and happily married to my hband of 12 years. The guys are different om men who intify as bisexual, gay, mostly gay, and mostly straight.

LIVGTOPICSALL LIVGSAVAGE LOVETRAVELASTROLOGYFROM THE VLTHEALTHSTYLELGBT+SEX & ROMANCEBT OF VANUVERTRANSPORATNCARTOONSHOMELS VANUVER SAVAGE LOVE COLUMNSAVAGE LOVE: IT'S HARMLS FOR A STRAIGHT GUY TO TEASE GAY GUYS FOR FUN ON GRDR

Of urse, some intify as straight but are realy closeted bisexuals or gays by sexual orientatn—perhaps likely to e out at a later age (if ever). My last post scribed a populatn of mal who nsir themselv heterosexual, do not label themselv gay or bisexual, chew volvement wh the LGBT muny, are often married or romantilly volved wh an oppose-sex partner, and who engage sex wh mal or exprs the sire to do so. Due large part to the popularizatn of the topic the btsellg 2005 book On the Down Low: A Journey to the Liv of 'Straight' Black Men Who Sleep wh Men,[i] Lato and Ain-Amerin men are the primary subjects rearch wh non-gay intified MSM.

One of the earlit studi, "The Bisexual and Non-Gay Attached Rearch Project" om the early 1990s, found that participants engagg same-sex sexual behavr but not intifyg as gay or bisexual scribed themselv as “kky,” “normal,” or “jt a guy.”[iii] A much more recent 2010 study nsisted of terviews wh heterosexually intified men who had engaged sexual activy wh another male the prev year; participants did not nsir this activy as discrepant wh their inty. Siar fdgs were found throughout a seri of terviews wh non-gay intified MSM prepared for the Centers for Disease Control and Preventn 2004. In tally, the men terviewed reported that if sexual activy between men was anonymo, experimental, ocsnal, or if substance e was volved, the act was not “gay.”.

LIVGTOPICSALL LIVGSAVAGE LOVETRAVELASTROLOGYFROM THE VLTHEALTHSTYLELGBT+SEX & ROMANCEBT OF VANUVERTRANSPORATNCARTOONSHOMELS VANUVER SAVAGE LOVE COLUMNSAVAGE LOVE: IT'S HARMLS FOR A STRAIGHT GUY TO TEASE GAY GUYS FOR FUN ON GRDR

Fally, while there is nflictg data, appears that non-gay intified MSM engage high levels of dg and alhol e.[vi] Many fact engage sexual activy wh other men as a means of obtag fancial rourc to procure such substanc. Usg this stricture as a gui, a man who has sex wh another male mt be gay (or bisexual at the least).

HOW TO GET A MAN (FOR GAY MEN)

Parsons, “Sexual Behavrs of Non-gay Intified Non-disclosg Men Who Have Sex wh Men and Women,” Archiv of Sexual Behavr 37, no.

[iii] Daryl Hood, Garrett Prtage, June Crawford, Tania Sorrell, and Chris O’Reilly, "Report on the BANGAR Project: Bisexual Activy/non Gay Attachment Rearch Targetg Strategi Intifitn Project." (Sydney: Natnal Centre HIV Epimlogy and Clil Rearch ,1994).

[v] STD Communitns Database: Interviews wh Non-Gay Intified Men who have Sex wh Men (NGI MSM),” (Atlanta, Geia: Orc Macro, 2005). Ramamurthi, Cleo Manago, Serg Ava, and Marv Jon, “Sexual Behavr, Sexual Inty, and Substance Abe Among Low-Ine Bisexual and Non-Gay-Intifyg Ain Amerin Men Who Have Sex wh Men,” Archiv of Sexual Behavr 37, no. More charably, might be a gift or a favor to a bisexual or gay iend.

CAN GAY AND STRAIGHT MEN REALLY BE FRIENDS?

“By unrstandg their same-sex sexual practice as meangls, accintal, or even necsary, straight whe men n perform homosexual ntact heterosexual ways…Ward argu that the real reason ‘straight’ men behave the ways is to ‘reaffirm rather than challenge their genr and racial inty’ and ‘to leverage whens and masculy to thentite their heterosexualy the ntext of sex wh men. ’ In other words: They do to prove they’re not gay. What Ward don’t addrs is whether the straight men are actually straight or some other sexual orientatn — such as mostly straight, bisexual, or gay--nial/hidg.

Not gay: Sex between straight whe men. This all got me thkg about my own iendships and those of my gay male clients. The bonds between gay men and straight women have been wrten about and featured popular media (i.

Sex the Cy, Will and Grace), though a lot ls has been said about how gay and straight men regnize and negotiate the distct challeng, plitns, and rewards of their iendships. Acrdg to Garfield, among the many obstacl to male-male platonic timacy, fear of homosexualy looms large.