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fu9x2 nX0Bq pP831"><iame tle="Advert" scrollg="no" class="Fk9zi JsaQ6"></iame></div></div><ma class="ceZ1j cp_grid" id="ma-ntent"><article data-ttid="article-body" class="_074l4 cp_grid__em cp_width--ctard--two-thirds"><h1 class="cp_headg rvITo">Matthew Todd: How to be gay and happy </h1><time class="iCsJz -L4qJ" dateTime="2016-06-15T14:50:36.000Z" data-ttid="date-time">Wednday 15 June at 3:50pm</time><div class="_8xmX9 ymMsu vr8OE" data-ttid="embed-brightve"><div data-ttid="player-overlay"><button class="_5ZKtN"><i class="cp_in cp_in__play-news-short-form EhtER lXUL6 cp_in--ctom-size" aria-hidn="false"><svg width="15" height="20" viewBox="0 0 15 20" fill="none" xmlns=" aria-label="Play Brightve vio" role="img"><tle>Play Brightve vio</tle><path fill-le="evenodd" clip-le="evenodd" d="M0.542124 0.110987C0.875033 -0.0604726 1.27584 -0.031568 1.5807 0.185886L14.5807 9.45861C14.8479 9.6492 15.0046 9.95875 14.9999 10.2869C14.9952 10.6151 14.8299 10.9201 14.5574 11.103L1.55738 19.8303C1.2507 20.0361 0.85551 20.0562 0.529562 19.8824C0.203615 19.7087 0 19.3694 0 19V1C0 0.625535 0.209216 0.282447 0.542124 0.110987Z" fill="whe"/></svg></i></button></div><vio-js data-acunt="2635130839001" data-player="wReX5gGy" data-embed="flt" ntrols="" data-vio-id="4942483385001" data-playlist-id="" data-applitn-id="" class="_4h-ua"></vio-js></div><blockquote class="lLs7Z vr8OE" data-ttid="quote"><p class="ka64y">We live a very cel and unkd society at the moment, I thk we all need to be nicer to each other</p><footer class="_2pxnR"><ce class="WTLsF">Matthew Todd, edor of gay liftyle magaze Attu, wants to put a stop to homophobic bullyg</ce></footer></blockquote><p class="BVYCX">Matthew Todd, edor of gay liftyle magaze Attu, joed Lorrae to discs his new book, a part-memoir, part-revolutnary gui for the LGBT muny on how to build happy secure liv and relatnships, pl he reveals why Prce William is takg a historic stand agast homophobic bullyg. </p><p class="BVYCX">In the book, Straight Jacket - How To Be Gay, Matthew talks about those who have been bullied for their sexualy and suffered om mental health problems such as anxiety, prsn, addictn, suicidal thoughts and behavur.</p><p class="BVYCX">He also scrib his own experienc and personal stggl of g out. </p><div class="_8xmX9 vr8OE" data-ttid="embed-twter"><blockquote class="twter-tweet"><a href="></a></blockquote></div><p class="BVYCX">The book's release the same week that Prce William is due to appear on the ont ver of Attu magaze. </p><p class="BVYCX">It is the first time a Brish royal has been photographed for the ver of an LGBT magaze. </p><p class="BVYCX">Straight Jacket - How To Be Gay is out tomorrow.</p><p class="BVYCX"><a class="qNUzV" href=">Catch up wh Lorrae on The ITV Hub</a></p></article><asi data-ttid="sibar" class="BkAIC cp_grid cp_grid__em cp_width--ctard--one-third"><h2 class="cp_headg cp_headg--subtle eVU28">Latt Articl</h2><div class="qk6wr cp_grid"><a class="cp_grid__em" data-ttid="next-lk-anchor" href="/lorrae/articl/zenas-raspberry-tiramisu"><article class="_9ngZG y6L7V" data-ttid="tile"><div class="_0qIxo" data-ttid="tile-image-wrapper"><div class="cp_placeholr" data-ttid="tile-picture"></div></div><div class="O7IOg" data-ttid="tile-text-wrapper"><hear><h3 class="r5Yoc"><span>Zena's Raspberry Tiramisu</span></h3><time class="iCsJz iJXFo" dateTime="2023-07-18T08:39:23.351Z" data-ttid="date-time">Tue 18 Jul 9:39am</time><p class="_-6cOu">Try Zena's h and uy take on the Italian classic! </p></hear></div></article></a><a class="cp_grid__em" data-ttid="next-lk-anchor" href="/lorrae/articl/what-type-of-saver-are-you"><article class="_9ngZG y6L7V" data-ttid="tile"><div class="_0qIxo" data-ttid="tile-image-wrapper"><div class="cp_placeholr" data-ttid="tile-picture"></div></div><div class="O7IOg" data-ttid="tile-text-wrapper"><hear><h3 class="r5Yoc"><span>What type of saver are you?</span></h3><time class="iCsJz iJXFo" dateTime="2023-07-12T10:22:11.957Z" data-ttid="date-time">Wed 12 Jul 11:22am</time><p class="_-6cOu">Your saver style uld dictate where the bt place to keep you money is, Claer Barrett explas. </p></hear></div></article></a><a class="cp_grid__em" data-ttid="next-lk-anchor" href="/lorrae/articl/zenas-smoky-butter-salmon"><article class="_9ngZG y6L7V" data-ttid="tile"><div class="_0qIxo" data-ttid="tile-image-wrapper"><div class="cp_placeholr" data-ttid="tile-picture"></div></div><div class="O7IOg" data-ttid="tile-text-wrapper"><hear><h3 class="r5Yoc"><span>Zena's Smoky Butter Salmon</span></h3><time class="iCsJz iJXFo" dateTime="2023-07-12T08:29:43.199Z" data-ttid="date-time">Wed 12 Jul 9:29am</time><p class="_-6cOu">Zena's Smoky Butter Salmon looks imprsive but tak jt 15ms to make. </p></hear></div></article></a></div></asi></ma><div data-ttid="ad-hear-footer"></div></div><div class="rmSd4 _6AExG" data-ttid="bero"><div class="t6G8p" data-ttid="bero-background"><div class="cp_placeholr" data-ttid="bero-background-img"></div><div class="pFzZl" 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to be happy and gay

Matthew Todd, edor of gay liftyle magaze Attu, joed Lorrae to discs his new book, a part-memoir, part-revolutnary gui for the ...

Contents:

GAY (HOMOSEXUAL) AND GAY (HAPPY)

You may be askg, What’s the big al? Well, I thk most people don’t expect a gay person to be happy. Or to be leadg a life that he or she is sufficiently happy or nfint of to talk openly… * to be happy and gay *

Tom Robson a Brish mician and sger, one of the first, if not the very first pop artist who did not disguise or hi his homosexualy om the general public. Until then homosexual actors, micians, athlet or anyone the public eye had two choic life: to keep their homosexualy a secret, pecially om the media, or adopt the mannerisms and a of drs which were very mp but at the same time (ironilly) never admtg their sexual preferenc publicly. Tom Robson released a very succsful song entled (Sg if you're) Glad to be Gay, was the mid-70s, and I was still at a Catholic primary school when I remember que distctly hearg gay beg ed for the first time to unteract the BrEng rogatory terms such as: poofter, poof, queer, not normal, fairy and queen that were rife at the time.

HOW TO BE HAPPY AS A GAY MAN

* to be happy and gay *

Glad to be Gay. The song was origally wrten by Tom Robson for a London gay pri.

An out gay sger, he subsequently formed the. "Glad to Be Gay" is built around four vers cricizg Brish society's attus towards gay people. In the first verse, criciz the Brish police for raidg gay pubs for no reason at all, once homosexualy had been crimalized sce the 1967 Sexual Offenc Act.

HOW TO ACCEPT THAT YOU ARE GAY

gay fn: 1. sexually or romantilly attracted to people of the same genr and not to people of a different…. Learn more. * to be happy and gay *

In the send verse, pots to the hypocrisy of Gay News beg prosecuted for obsceny stead of porn magaz like magaz Playboy or the tabloid The Sun which publish photographs of topls girls on Page 3. It also criciz the way homosexual people are portrayed other parts of the prs, pecially nservative newspapers News of the World and Sunday Exprs. On the third verse, pots out the extreme nsequenc of homophobia, such as vlence agast LGBT people.

BEG GAY AND INCREDIBLY HAPPYKEAY NIGEL·FOLLOWPUBLISHED THE MEANG OF LIFE IS TO GIVE LIFE A MEANG.·8 M READ·APR 15, 2015--LISTENSHARE25 AND I’M PERHAPS AT MY HAPPIT. EVER!YOU MAY BE ASKG, WHAT’S THE BIG AL? WELL, I THK MOST PEOPLE DON’T EXPECT A GAY PERSON TO BE HAPPY. OR TO BE LEADG A LIFE THAT HE OR SHE IS SUFFICIENTLY HAPPY OR NFINT OF TO TALK OPENLY ABOUT.TOO MANY A TIME THE NEWS THAT WE HEAR ABOUT THE LBIAN, GAY, BISEXUAL AND TRANSGENR (LGBT) MUNY OR AN LGBT PERSON TEND TO BE SOMETHG BAD OR NEGATIVE. SUICIS, DISCRIMATN, JTICE, BULLYG, JT TO NAME A FEW. WE SELDOM HEAR SOMETHG GOOD OR POSIVE.IT IS IRONIC THAT THE WORD “GAY” ALSO MEANS CHEERFUL AND REEE, BEE MANY GAY PEOPLE ARE LIVG THE DIRECT OPPOSE.WELL, LET ME START MY STORY HERE:I WAS LTLE WHEN I BEGAN LEARNG THAT BEG EFFEMATE IS NO GOOD FOR A BOY.AT FIRST, PEOPLE HTED AT , MY LACK OF OBSSN WH TOY RS AND MY TERT DRSG UP BARBIE DOLLS. I WAS JT A CHILD AT THAT POT, SO I DIDN’T RE MUCH.BUT THEN PEOPLE STARTED DROPPG TERMS LIKE “SISSY,” “GAY” AND OTHER EQUIVALENTS. AT SOME POT, I REALISED THAT THOSE WORDS WERE ED TO SHAME MY BEHAVUR.BUT AS A KID, YOU DON’T REALLY UNRSTAND MUCH, DO YOU? YOU DON’T/N’T PROCS WHAT’S A PERSONAL ATTACK, WHAT’S A CRICISM, AND WHAT’S A HONT, SCERE ADVICE. AS A KID, WHEN SOMEONE SAYS SOMETHG THAT HURTS YOUR FEELGS, YOU JT FEEL BAD. YOU DON’T EVALUATE WHETHER ’S NSTCTIVE CRICISM OR NOT. SIARLY, WHEN SOMEONE THROWS YOU A PLIMENT, YOU FEEL GOOD AND HAPPY. YOU DON’T DOUBLE GUS OR TRY TO READ BETWEEN THE L TO SEE IF ’S SARSM OR NOT.LIFE SEEMED SIMPLER. BEE YOU WERE SIMPLER.GROWG UP, I THK WE ALL HAD OUR EQUAL SHARE OF GOOD THGS AND BAD THGS THAT HAD BEEN SAID TO . AND THE THGS HAD EHER MA FEEL GOOD OR BAD ABOUT OURSELV. THEY ARE WHAT THAT BUILT TO THE PERSON THAT WE ARE TODAY.FOR ME, A LOT OF THE THGS THAT HAD BEEN SAID TO ME THE PAST HURT ME EPLY. I DON’T BLAME WHOEVER THOUGH — I DIDN’T EXACTLY VOICE OUT WHAT WORDS HAD HURT MY FEELGS.HERE’S ANOTHER THG ABOUT KIDS — THEY DON’T OFTEN VOLISE THEIR NER WORLD METICULO TAILS. THAT DON’T MEAN THEY WILL FET ABOUT ALL THOUGH.IN MY SUBNSC, I KNEW THAT SOMETHG WAS AMISS. WHILE I NTUED DOG MY THG, PLAYG WH BARBIE DOLLS, PLAYG HOE, PLAYG PRETEND AS A MERMAID AND ETC., I STARTED TO FEEL GUILTY. I KNEW THAT I WAS BEHAVG A WAY THAT THE ADULTS EMED AS WRONG. AS APPROPRIATE. AS SHAMEFUL. AS GAY.YOU SEE, WHEN YOU’RE TOLD AGA AND AGA THAT WHAT YOU FD TO BE SO NATURAL AND SO STCTIVE TO BE WRONG AND SHAMEFUL, YOU N’T HELP BUT TO FEEL BAD ABOUT YOURSELF. NOT JT YOUR BEHAVUR, THE THGS YOU DO, BUT ALSO, THE PERSON THAT YOU ARE.HAVE YOU EVER FAILED A TT OR AN EXAM AND FELT REALLY BAD ABOUT ? AND WHEN YOU WENT BACK HOME AND TOLD YOUR PARENTS ABOUT , THEY THEN MA WORSE BY LECTURG YOU?THERE WAS A TIME WHEN MY LIFE WAS A NEVER-ENDG, ALL DAY, 24 HOURS TT OF WHETHER I F TO GENR STEREOTYP.SOME PARENTS MAY ARGUE THAT THEM RMG OR TG THEIR CHILD ABOUT EXISTG GENR STEREOTYP IS ACTUALLY DONE GOOD FAH. IT’S TO HELP THEIR CHILD TO AVOID BULLYG. LIKE TELLG THEIR SON NOT TO TAKE ON THE ROLE OF A PRCS OR A FAIRY WHEN PLAYG PRETEND WOULD TURN HELP HIM AVOID BEG BULLIED OR DISCRIMATED AGAST.“BUT HOW LONG DO YOU TEND TO GO ON WH THIS PROTECTIVE ACT?FOREVER?”SO YOU ARE GOG TO TEACH YOUR SON OR DGHTER THAT ORR TO AVOID BEG HATED OR DISLIKED, HE OR SHE SHOULD PURSUE THE ABSOLUTE NFORMATN TO SOCIAL AND GENR STEREOTYP?AND FOR WHAT? TO BE HAPPY? TO BE ACCEPTABLE TO OTHER PEOPLE AND TURN FEEL A SENSE OF JOY ABOUT ?THAT I TELL YOU N BE ONE OF THE SADST WAYS TO LIVE: TO BASE YOUR HAPPS ON OTHERS’ OPN OF YOU, AND NOT YOUR OWN OPN OF YOURSELF.I N STILL REMEMBER A PARTICULAR CINT OM MY CHILDHOOD WHERE I WAS TOLD BY MY MOM TO STOP “WALKG LIKE A GIRL.” SHE ADD THAT ’S SHAMEFUL FOR ME TO ACT THAT WAY AND I WOULD BE LGHED AT BY OTHER PEOPLE IF I NTUED SO. I WAS OF URSE GREATLY UPSET BY THE MENT. AND GREATLY EMBARRASSED.THAT WAS ALSO ONE OF THOSE FEW MOMENTS WHERE I LEARNED SOMETHG ABOUT SOCIAL RELATNS, THAT I NEED TO ACT A CERTA WAY SO THAT I WOULD BE ACCEPTED BY OTHER PEOPLE. THAT I SHOULDN’T ACT WAYS THAT MIGHT MAKE PEOPLE REJECT ME…BUT WH THAT, I HAD ALSO STARTED TO REJECT MYSELF, SLOWLY, B BY B.I WOULD TRY TO “RRECT” MYSELF. I LEARNED TO BE HYPERCRIL OF MYSELF, TO NICK-PICK. I WOULD TRY TO INTIFY PARTS OF MYSELF THAT PEOPLE MIGHT POSSIBLY DISLIKE, EVEN BEFORE I WAS EVER TOLD THAT THEY WERE DISLIKED.THROUGH THIS PROCS, I LEARNED MUCH ABOUT TROSPECTN ED. BUT I HAD ALSO E TO BELIEVE THAT MY NATURAL SELF ULDN’T BE TSTED. IT’S GOG TO BETRAY ME ONE DAY.SO I GOT TO FIGHT . I HAD GOT TO… NOT BE MYSELF.I SPECT AT SOME POT OF MY TEENAGE-HOOD, I HAD LOST TRACK OF WHETHER SUPPRSG MY TE SELF WAS ALL DONE FOR MY OWN BENEF, OR FOR THE BENEFS OF OTHERS.I HAD STOPPED LIVG TO MAKE MYSELF HAPPY, BUT TO MAKE OTHERS HAPPY.I WAS NEVER TGHT TO STAND UP TO BULLI. WELL, I NEVER TOLD MY PARENTS OR PLAED TO ANYONE THAT I WAS BULLIED SCHOOL. SO I ME UP WH MY OWN SOLUTN: I STAYED SILENT.IN FACT, I WAS ALWAYS FEAR OF SOMEONE DROPPG A HURTFUL MENT. JT SO YOU KNOW, ’S ALWAYS THE MOST NOCENT MENT DROPPED THAT HURT THE MOST — THE ARROW THAT WAS SHOT BEFORE MY FENSIVE GEAR WAS UP.I WOULD TRY TO PUT UP A BRAVE ONT, BUT ON SI I WAS CMBLG FEAR AND SHAME. AND I WOULD THEN TURN MY BACK AGAST MY OWN SELF. I WOULD PUT ON MY OWN SET OF TATED LENS, WHICH I HAD REFED B BY B THROUGH THE YEARS, AND BEE MY OWN JUDGE.I HAD THOUGHT THAT I NEED TO CHANGE THE WAY THAT I WAS SO AS TO AVOID THE HURT. THERE WAS NOTHG I ULD DO ABOUT THE BULLI; ALL I HAD TO WORK ON WAS MYSELF. AND SO I TRIED TO MAKE MYSELF SMALLER, TO STAND OUT LS. TO BE MORE… VISIBLE.IN THE END, I BEME MY OWN WORST CRIQUE.IT WAS LIKE HAVG ANOTHER VOICE MY HEAD WHICH I WAS SUPPOSED TO FEAR AND ABI TO. IT WAS MY OTHER SELF WHOM I HAD BELIEVED TO BE THE “MORE RIGHT” VERSN OF MYSELF. THE VERSN WHO WOULD BE DOG ALL THE RIGHT THGS, MAKG EVERYONE LIKE HIM. HE WHOM MY PARENTS AND RELATIV WOULD BE EXCEEDGLY PROUD OF.HE WAS THE ONE I TSTED THE MOST. AND I KNEW THAT HE’S NSTANTLY TRYG TO IMPROVE HIMSELF AT THE SAME TIME TO BE EVEN MORE SHREWD DIFFERENT SOCIAL SETTGS, AND MORE SENSIVE AND TELLIGENT PICKG UP SOCIAL CU, SO AS TO HELP ME AVOID SUATNS THAT MIGHT E ME TO EMBARRASS MYSELF.FOR YEARS I HAD LIVED LIKE THAT. AND EVEN NOW, I STILL HAVE HIM MY HEAD — THAT PART OF ME. THE ONE WHOM I THOUGHT WOULD KNOW BETTER.BUT NO.THE TTH IS, HE DON’T KNOW BETTER.HE DO NOT KNOW ANYTHG ABOUT LIVG A HONT, OPEN LIFE.HE KNOWS NOTHG ABOUT FREEDOM, OR ABOUT LIVG A LIFE WHICH IS WHOUT SHAME OR FEAR.HE IS FACT A WARD WHO N’T LIVE WHOUT PEOPLE’S APPROVAL OF HIM. THEIR S, THEIR PRAIS AND THEIR ACCEPTANCE.HE IS A PEOPLE PLEASER WHO THRIV ON OTHERS’ ACKNOWLEDGEMENT OF HIM BEE HE NEVER HAD THE PACY TO LOVE HIMSELF REGARDLS.HE NEVER HAD THE URAGE TO BE WHO HE REALLY IS. BEE HE WAS NOT TGHT TO BE BRAVE. HE WAS TOLD TO FEAR NSTANTLY AND BE WARY ALWAYS.AND HE WAS ME, AND I WAS HIM.I WAS MY WORST ENEMY.I HAVE E A LONG WAY. A LONG, LONG WAY TO WHO I AM TODAY.I WAS LIVG THE FIGHT-OR-FLIGHT MO FOR AS LONG AS I N REMEMBER. IF I WASN’T FIGHTG OTHERS, I WAS FIGHTG MYSELF.BUT NOW, I AM NO LONGER AAID OF BEG LLED OUT FOR BEG GAY. YOU N PASS A JOKE ABOUT ME AND MY “GAYNS,” I DON’T RE. OR RATHER, I AM GLAD THAT YOU BOTHER TALKG ABOUT ME. BEE THAT MOMENT, I WOULD HAVE MEANT SOMETHG TO YOU. AND YOU? YOU WOULD MEAN NOTHG MORE THAN THE OLD VERSN OF ME WHOM I’VE BUT GROWN OUT OF.THE FIGHT IS OVER.TWO S WORTH OF .LIFE SUCKS SOMETIM. AND WILL BE A WHOLE LOT WORSE IF YOU ACTUALLY BELIEVE THE WRONGS THAT OTHER PEOPLE SAY YOU HAVE.

Gay is a word wh many meangs. A gay person is homosexual, but if we scribe somethg like a scene or a party as gay, that means 's bright, merry, and happy. * to be happy and gay *

For me, a young child livg London at the time, the term gay (meang homosexual and not "happy") was ed much more equently by the media and the general public after the release of "Glad to be Gay".

CAN YOU BE GAY AND HAPPY?

It also helped that Tom Robson looked straight and was not the least mp, he did not f the stereotypil ia of how homosexuals looked and behaved. This is supposed to be gay heaven.

We’ve left the dull, homophobic towns, but we’ve lost somethg the procs. Most people the LGBTQ+ muny know om experience that acceptg your sexualy will lead to your beg a happier, more open this gui, the term gay has been ed to clu all forms of non-heterosexual attractn, whether that be people who are lbian, gay, bisexual, queer, pansexual, or otherwise not straight.

5 REASONS IT’S GOOD TO BE GAY AND SGLE

Know if you are gay.

MATTHEW TODD: HOW TO BE GAY AND HAPPY

Consir takg an onle sexualy quiz, like this one, to see if intifyg as gay feels right for you. There isn't any need to change yourself - beg gay is jt another way of simply existg, and there is nothg wrong wh at all.

WHO ARE THE HAPPIT? STRAIGHTS AND GAYS, BUT NOT BISEXUALS

Neher is there anythg wrong wh you for beg gay. The fact that I am gay is jt another facet of who I am, jt as beg creative, or optimistic, or havg brown ey is. Remember that beg gay do not require you to nform to typil gay stereotyp.

ARE GAY MEN HAPPIER THAN STRAIGHT MEN?

Most people who are gay are distguishable om those that aren't.

Beg gay do not necsarily make you any ls mascule or feme, and there is no need or prsure to nform to stereotyp that don't feel right to you - bee you are who you are. You do not need to f to the gay muny jt as much as you don't need to f to the straight muny.

MEANG OF GAY ENGLISH

In 100 years, "gay" will be an entirely different ncept. There is no evince that "helpg gay people to bee heterosexual" is possible.

KEV MAXEN BE FIRST MALE ACH A US MEN’S PROFSNAL SPORTS LEAGUE TO PUBLICLY E OUT AS GAY

Homosexualy is not viewed as an illns and short, won't be treated as such. There are many, many gay people all sorts of muni, and there are many people there for you when you need support.

Fd a group or a hangout where you feel fortable, and where there will be other gay people to talk wh. If you were raised an environment that owns on homosexualy, you are not worth any ls. The laws the Bible were maly for health purpos - shunng homosexualy is right next to not gettg tattoos, not eatg pork, and not wearg mixed lens, but you n bet your bottom dollar all your neighbors do those thgs.

*BEAR-MAGAZINE.COM* TO BE HAPPY AND GAY

How To Be Gay And Happy .

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