LGBTQ adoptn: Gay dads on 'magic' moment they met son

Contents:

• UK'S FIRST GAY DADS' TRIPLETS TO MAKE HISTORY WH 3 PARENTS ON BIRTH CERTIFIT
• GAY DADS SHARE ‘MAGIC’ MOMENT THEY MET THEIR SON: ‘YOU KNOW WHEN SOMETHG’S RIGHT’
• THE RISE OF THE GAY DAD
• GAY ADOPTN
• PAIR OF GAY DADS ADOPT SIX SIBLGS AFTER FOUR YEARS OF NEGLECT AND ABE THE FOSTER RE SYSTEM
• Q&A: ADOPTN FOR THE SGLE GAY MAN
• ADOPTED BOY SEXUALLY ABED BY GAY FATHERS

UK'S FIRST GAY DADS' TRIPLETS TO MAKE HISTORY WH 3 PARENTS ON BIRTH CERTIFIT

Father of six Barrie Drewt-Barlow is havg triplets wh his new fiancé Stt Hutchson and his ex hband Tony wh the pair spendg £1ln on their IVF fayThe fay uld soon make history wh three parents listed on the birth certifitBra's first gay dads are set to wele triplets after a £1ln journey to plete their IVF fay. Barrie and Tony were Bra's first gay dads after havg tws Safon and Aspen. ” A legal precent has been set the US by a gay “throuple”.

In-pth rearch to the experienc of adoptive fai head by same-sex upl suggts that children adopted by gay or lbian upl are jt as likely to thrive as those adopted by heterosexual upl. The study pared three kds of adoptive fai: those head by gay fathers (41 fai), those head by lbian mothers (40 fai), and those head by heterosexual parents (49 fai). The differenc that did emerge relate to levels of prsive symptoms parents, which are pecially low for gay fathers, and the ntrastg pathways to adoptn which was send choice for many of the heterosexual and some lbian parents – but first choice for all but one of the gay parents.

Natnal statistics show that annually around 60 children are adopted by gay upl and a further 60 by lbian upl.

GAY DADS SHARE ‘MAGIC’ MOMENT THEY MET THEIR SON: ‘YOU KNOW WHEN SOMETHG’S RIGHT’

Gay fathers were signifintly ls likely to report havg prsive symptoms than lbian mothers and heterosexual upl, most probably reflectg the lower levels of prsn shown by men than women generally. Gay fathers appeared to have more teractn wh their children and the children of gay fathers had particularly by social liv. This was particularly te of gay fathers many of whom had viewed their sexual inty as patible wh parenthood.

THE RISE OF THE GAY DAD

In ntrast, only one of the gay upl had tried (but failed) to nceive wh the help of a surrogate. For the remag gay upl, adoptn was the first choice. A number of same sex upl, however, reported that agenci lacked experience workg wh gay and lbian parents and that this showed self awkwardns.

GAY ADOPTN

One gay parent scribed havg the phone put down on him when he said that his partner was a man. "It was dntg, " says the 42-year-old former opera sger om Edgemere, Maryland, who, as a sgle gay man, did not match the agency's ual clientele. "One gay uple told me they didn't know was legal.

As the months turned to over a year wa for his son, Marshall grew ncerned that a baby would not be placed wh him bee he was gay. Sce then, the number of children adopted by lbian, gay, bi or trans parents has grown year on year. Last year, more than one five children adopted through Coram were placed wh lovg lbian, gay, bi or trans adopters.

Dpe the law, some people still thk beg gay means you n’t be a parent. This was particularly te of gay dads, many of whom thought their sexual inty was patible wh parenthood – spe havg always felt paternal. Rearch published by CoramBAAF actually suggts that gay fathers show greater levels of teractn wh their child than other typ of parents.

PAIR OF GAY DADS ADOPT SIX SIBLGS AFTER FOUR YEARS OF NEGLECT AND ABE THE FOSTER RE SYSTEM

The CoramBAAF Bookshop has a range of books for parents and children themed around adoptn and fosterg, wh a specific topic area for lbian and gay fai. Gay, Lbian and Heterosexual Adoptive Fai: Fay Relatnships, Child Adjtment and Adopters’ Experienc (BAAF) (2013).

The study, which was rried out by Cambridge Universy, suggts that adoptive fai wh gay fathers might be farg particularly well.

Q&A: ADOPTN FOR THE SGLE GAY MAN

This rearch volved the terview of children and young people wh lbian, gay and bisexual parents and found that very young children didn’t see their fay as beg any different to others. Ccially, the children and young people wh lbian, gay and bisexual parents didn’t want their fay to change.

In the past two years the number of gay men approved to adopt has doubled. Even at the recment stage, you might hear agenci sayg they've already got a gay or lbian uple on their books and they're not lookg for any more, or bee you're whe you n't go on their books, or bee you're gay you'll not get children unr five.

ADOPTED BOY SEXUALLY ABED BY GAY FATHERS

But maybe that will change when social workers have more experience of kids dog jt as well gay- or lbian-head statistics om the Natnal Adoptn Register suggt gay and lbian adopters are more open to olr kids and siblg groups, and also we're more ethnilly mixed as upl than heterosexuals.

And beg gay or lbian should help you relate to the experienc of the children, bee they've experienced difficult starts life, they feel different and exclud and aware that other children haven't had siar are a lot of very supportive, well-meang social workers. But sometim they n impose a hierarchy of adopters which married heterosexual adopters wh money are at the top and a sgle, gay, whe man would be at the bottom – a sgle, gay, black man would be higher, sce they are keen to match ethnilly (most gay and lbian adopters thk they were never gog to have children who were gog to look like them anyway, so what do matter? The law is jt about givg gay and lbian adopters an equal opportuny to apply.