Could gay guys be the ultimate wg men for their straight, male iends?
Contents:
- ON MASCULY AND MALE BONDGMEN MAY STGGLE TO FORM EP, EMOTNAL, AND MEANGFUL NNECTNS. BUT HERE ARE SOME NON-TRADNAL WAYS TO BOND WH OTHER MEN.SAM WOOLFE·FOLLOWPUBLISHED CHANGE BE YOU·8 M READ·NOV 25, 2021--LISTENSHAREBEG ABLE TO FORM STRONG BONDS WH OTHER MEN IS OFTEN SENTIAL TO PROTECTG A MAN’S WELL-BEG. THE PROBLEM, HOWEVER, IS THAT A LOT OF MEN STGGLE TO FORM EP, EMOTNAL, AND MEANGFUL NNECTNS WH MEN THEIR LIV, CLUDG THOSE PEOPLE THEY LOVE OR RE ABOUT THE MOST, SUCH AS THEIR FATHER OR GOOD IENDS.IN NTEMPORARY SOCIETY, MEN FD EASY TO BOND AN ACTIVE OR PETIVE WAY, WHETHER THAT’S THE FORM OF SPORTS, MARTIAL ARTS, THE ARY, PETIVE GAM, OR OUTDOOR ACTIVI. MEN WILL ALSO TRADNALLY BOND WAYS THAT NFIRM THEIR MASCULE INTY, SUCH AS PARTYG AND DRKG TOGETHER, AND A BS SETTG.HOWEVER, NOT ALL MEN ARE PASSNATELY TERTED THE KDS OF PURSUS. THEY MAY WANT TO FORM EP, GENUE NNECTNS WH MEN THAT DON’T PEND ON MASCULE NORMS LIKE PETIVENS, WNG, DOMANCE, VLENCE, PRIMACY OF WORK, OR PURSU OF STAT. AND THERE’S NOTHG WRONG WH HAVG THE PREFERENC. THEY DON’T MAKE YOU ANY LS OF A MAN. THEY JT MEAN YOU MIGHT HAVE A CERTA PERSONALY TYPE OR CLATN THAT ATTRACT YOU TO SOME ACTIVI AND NOT OTHERS. FOR EXAMPLE, IF YOU’RE A HIGHLY SENSIVE MAN, YOU MAY PREFER QUIET ONE-ON-ONE NVERSATNS TO PARTYG WH YOUR IENDS A LOUD, BY BAR OR NIGHTCLUB.FORTUNATELY, THERE ARE ALL KDS OF SOCIAL SUATNS AND NTEXTS THAT ALLOW FOR THE KDS OF NVERSATNS. HERE ARE SOME EXAMPL OF NON-TRADNAL WAYS THAT MEN N BOND.GOG OUT TO EATTHE BRO-DATE OR MAN-DATE IS EXTREMELY UNRRATED. THEY ARE CCIAL TO ANY BROMANCE. TWO GUYS MIGHT FEEL UNFORTABLE GOG OUT TOGETHER FOR A MEAL, UNLS (GOD, FORBID) SOMEONE THKS THEY’RE A GAY UPLE. WHICH REALLY GO TO SHOW HOW UNHELPFUL AND RIDICULO MASCULE NORMS ARE. ONE OF THE 11 MASCULE NORMS THAT MEN FEEL EXPECTED TO NFIRM TO IS DISDA FOR HOMOSEXUALS. THE WAY THIS MANIFTS IS THAT MANY MEN WILL AVOID BEHAVUR, TERACTNS, OR RELATNSHIPS THAT — THEIR EY OR ANYONE ELSE’S — MIGHT BE PERCEIVED AS OR MOCKED FOR BEG ‘GAY’.WOMEN DON’T REALLY HAVE TO NTEND WH THIS ISSUE. TWO STRAIGHT FEMALE IENDS DON’T MEET UP FOR DNER AND WORRY ABOUT BEG PERCEIVED AS GAY, NOR ARE THEY LIKELY TO RE IF THEY WERE. THIS IS A GENERALISATN, OF URSE, BUT THE MASCULE NORM OF DISDA FOR HOMOSEXUALS REALLY DO AFFECT THE KDS OF RELATNSHIPS MEN HAVE WH EACH OTHER. WHICH IS A SHAME.THERE’S NOTHG WRONG, EFFEMATE, OR ABNORMAL ABOUT TWO GUYS GOG OUT FOR A MEAL. YET, IF YOU’RE EVER A RTRANT AND SEE TWO PEOPLE EATG TOGETHER WHO ARE CLEARLY IENDS, ’S PLETELY NORMAL TO SEE TWO FEMALE IENDS BUT YOU’RE LS LIKELY TO SEE TWO MALE IENDS TCHG UP WH EACH OTHER OVER SOME FOOD. HOWEVER, THE BENEFS OF HAVG A ONE-ON-ONE MEAL WH A MALE PEER OR IEND N’T BE OVERSTATED. OFTEN, WHEN MEN ARE GROUPS, BE DIFFICULT TO HAVE OPEN, HONT, AND HEARTFELT CHATS BEE THE DYNAMICS CHANGE. MEN ARE MORE LIKELY TO BE PETIVE AND JOKEY WHEN THEY’RE AMONGST A GROUP OF GUYS. IF THERE’S SOMETHG YOU WANT TO GET OFF YOUR CHT, MAY SEEM APPROPRIATE TO DO THIS KD OF NTEXT.WHEN ’S JT TWO GUYS HANGG OUT, ON THE OTHER HAND, MEN MAY FD EASIER TO TALK NDIDLY ABOUT THEIR EMOTNAL LIFE. THIS IS PECIALLY TE FOR TROVERTED MEN, WHO MAY PREFER ONE-ON-ONE NVERSATNS TO LARGER GROUP TERACTNS SCE THE FORMER MORE EASILY ALLOW FOR EP, MEANGFUL NVERSATNS. INTROVERTED MEN THRIVE THE TYP OF NVERSATNS AND MAY FEEL MORE DRAED BY AND LS TERTED SURFACE-LEVEL OR IVOLO TOPICS (WHICH IS NOT TO SAY THAT TROVERTS ARE A BORG LOT WHO SHY AWAY OM BANTER, OF URSE).SO, IF THERE’S A IEND OR MALE PEER YOU’D LIKE TO HAVE A MORE HONT DIALOGUE WH, MAKE PLANS TO EAT SOMEWHERE TOGETHER. TURN THAT TO A REGULAR THG AND YOU N BUILD A MALE BOND THAT MAY ACT AS AN EXTREMELY CCIAL AND UNIQUE PART OF YOUR SUPPORT WORK.ROAD TRIPS OR LONG CAR JOURNEYS
- TOP 10 GAY CAMPGROUNDS AMERI
- MDG THERAPYMENTAL HEALTH AND POP CULTURE MEETMA MENUSKIP TO PRIMARY NTENTSKIP TO SENDARY NTENTHOMECONTACTABOUT (SORT OF)NOVEL “MDG THERAPY”SCREENPLAYDISCLAIMER/PRIVACY/COMMENTS POLICY SEARCH POST NAVIGATN ← PREV NEXT →MALE BONDG: THE IMPORTANCE OF MEN’S FRIENDSHIPS
ON MASCULY AND MALE BONDGMEN MAY STGGLE TO FORM EP, EMOTNAL, AND MEANGFUL NNECTNS. BUT HERE ARE SOME NON-TRADNAL WAYS TO BOND WH OTHER MEN.SAM WOOLFE·FOLLOWPUBLISHED CHANGE BE YOU·8 M READ·NOV 25, 2021--LISTENSHAREBEG ABLE TO FORM STRONG BONDS WH OTHER MEN IS OFTEN SENTIAL TO PROTECTG A MAN’S WELL-BEG. THE PROBLEM, HOWEVER, IS THAT A LOT OF MEN STGGLE TO FORM EP, EMOTNAL, AND MEANGFUL NNECTNS WH MEN THEIR LIV, CLUDG THOSE PEOPLE THEY LOVE OR RE ABOUT THE MOST, SUCH AS THEIR FATHER OR GOOD IENDS.IN NTEMPORARY SOCIETY, MEN FD EASY TO BOND AN ACTIVE OR PETIVE WAY, WHETHER THAT’S THE FORM OF SPORTS, MARTIAL ARTS, THE ARY, PETIVE GAM, OR OUTDOOR ACTIVI. MEN WILL ALSO TRADNALLY BOND WAYS THAT NFIRM THEIR MASCULE INTY, SUCH AS PARTYG AND DRKG TOGETHER, AND A BS SETTG.HOWEVER, NOT ALL MEN ARE PASSNATELY TERTED THE KDS OF PURSUS. THEY MAY WANT TO FORM EP, GENUE NNECTNS WH MEN THAT DON’T PEND ON MASCULE NORMS LIKE PETIVENS, WNG, DOMANCE, VLENCE, PRIMACY OF WORK, OR PURSU OF STAT. AND THERE’S NOTHG WRONG WH HAVG THE PREFERENC. THEY DON’T MAKE YOU ANY LS OF A MAN. THEY JT MEAN YOU MIGHT HAVE A CERTA PERSONALY TYPE OR CLATN THAT ATTRACT YOU TO SOME ACTIVI AND NOT OTHERS. FOR EXAMPLE, IF YOU’RE A HIGHLY SENSIVE MAN, YOU MAY PREFER QUIET ONE-ON-ONE NVERSATNS TO PARTYG WH YOUR IENDS A LOUD, BY BAR OR NIGHTCLUB.FORTUNATELY, THERE ARE ALL KDS OF SOCIAL SUATNS AND NTEXTS THAT ALLOW FOR THE KDS OF NVERSATNS. HERE ARE SOME EXAMPL OF NON-TRADNAL WAYS THAT MEN N BOND.GOG OUT TO EATTHE BRO-DATE OR MAN-DATE IS EXTREMELY UNRRATED. THEY ARE CCIAL TO ANY BROMANCE. TWO GUYS MIGHT FEEL UNFORTABLE GOG OUT TOGETHER FOR A MEAL, UNLS (GOD, FORBID) SOMEONE THKS THEY’RE A GAY UPLE. WHICH REALLY GO TO SHOW HOW UNHELPFUL AND RIDICULO MASCULE NORMS ARE. ONE OF THE 11 MASCULE NORMS THAT MEN FEEL EXPECTED TO NFIRM TO IS DISDA FOR HOMOSEXUALS. THE WAY THIS MANIFTS IS THAT MANY MEN WILL AVOID BEHAVUR, TERACTNS, OR RELATNSHIPS THAT — THEIR EY OR ANYONE ELSE’S — MIGHT BE PERCEIVED AS OR MOCKED FOR BEG ‘GAY’.WOMEN DON’T REALLY HAVE TO NTEND WH THIS ISSUE. TWO STRAIGHT FEMALE IENDS DON’T MEET UP FOR DNER AND WORRY ABOUT BEG PERCEIVED AS GAY, NOR ARE THEY LIKELY TO RE IF THEY WERE. THIS IS A GENERALISATN, OF URSE, BUT THE MASCULE NORM OF DISDA FOR HOMOSEXUALS REALLY DO AFFECT THE KDS OF RELATNSHIPS MEN HAVE WH EACH OTHER. WHICH IS A SHAME.THERE’S NOTHG WRONG, EFFEMATE, OR ABNORMAL ABOUT TWO GUYS GOG OUT FOR A MEAL. YET, IF YOU’RE EVER A RTRANT AND SEE TWO PEOPLE EATG TOGETHER WHO ARE CLEARLY IENDS, ’S PLETELY NORMAL TO SEE TWO FEMALE IENDS BUT YOU’RE LS LIKELY TO SEE TWO MALE IENDS TCHG UP WH EACH OTHER OVER SOME FOOD. HOWEVER, THE BENEFS OF HAVG A ONE-ON-ONE MEAL WH A MALE PEER OR IEND N’T BE OVERSTATED. OFTEN, WHEN MEN ARE GROUPS, BE DIFFICULT TO HAVE OPEN, HONT, AND HEARTFELT CHATS BEE THE DYNAMICS CHANGE. MEN ARE MORE LIKELY TO BE PETIVE AND JOKEY WHEN THEY’RE AMONGST A GROUP OF GUYS. IF THERE’S SOMETHG YOU WANT TO GET OFF YOUR CHT, MAY SEEM APPROPRIATE TO DO THIS KD OF NTEXT.WHEN ’S JT TWO GUYS HANGG OUT, ON THE OTHER HAND, MEN MAY FD EASIER TO TALK NDIDLY ABOUT THEIR EMOTNAL LIFE. THIS IS PECIALLY TE FOR TROVERTED MEN, WHO MAY PREFER ONE-ON-ONE NVERSATNS TO LARGER GROUP TERACTNS SCE THE FORMER MORE EASILY ALLOW FOR EP, MEANGFUL NVERSATNS. INTROVERTED MEN THRIVE THE TYP OF NVERSATNS AND MAY FEEL MORE DRAED BY AND LS TERTED SURFACE-LEVEL OR IVOLO TOPICS (WHICH IS NOT TO SAY THAT TROVERTS ARE A BORG LOT WHO SHY AWAY OM BANTER, OF URSE).SO, IF THERE’S A IEND OR MALE PEER YOU’D LIKE TO HAVE A MORE HONT DIALOGUE WH, MAKE PLANS TO EAT SOMEWHERE TOGETHER. TURN THAT TO A REGULAR THG AND YOU N BUILD A MALE BOND THAT MAY ACT AS AN EXTREMELY CCIAL AND UNIQUE PART OF YOUR SUPPORT WORK.ROAD TRIPS OR LONG CAR JOURNEYS
* gay bonding *
It's worth notg that their paper isn't foced on explag kissg per se, but rather homosexual/homoerotic behavr: the argument is that homoerotic behavr functns to build social bonds between same-sex others. Siarly, one might expect that the gnive system signed for erng sexual aroal should be relatively tonomo om systems signed to bond socially wh same-sex others, as homosexual behavr is a b of a reproductive ad-end. Most k and social bondg appears to be succsfully navigated whout any erotic behavr takg place (Kirkpatrick, 2000), so we n safely say that homoerotic behavr is no way a requirement of bondg for humans.
TOP 10 GAY CAMPGROUNDS AMERI
Foregog those issu, though, the affiliatn hypothis for homoerotic behavr would not necsarily tell much about the existence of homosexual orientatns. Ined, Fleischman, Fsler, & Cholakians (2014) reported that men primed wh sexual words saw no crease their homoerotic motivatn, though there was a slight crease the affiliatn primed group.
It seems, by their own logic, we should not predict homoerotic motivatns to stop heterosexual on (they predict the oppose, fact).
The distributn problem is even worse when nsirg male sexual orientatn, which fds most men reportg a heterosexual orientatn, homosexual beg send most mon, and very few ditg beg bisexual. On the topic of social stigma, though, if the functn of homoerotic behavr is to bond wh others socially, seems peculiar that so many moral junctns agast homosexual behavr exist many cultur worldwi.
MDG THERAPYMENTAL HEALTH AND POP CULTURE MEETMA MENUSKIP TO PRIMARY NTENTSKIP TO SENDARY NTENTHOMECONTACTABOUT (SORT OF)NOVEL “MDG THERAPY”SCREENPLAYDISCLAIMER/PRIVACY/COMMENTS POLICY SEARCH POST NAVIGATN ← PREV NEXT →MALE BONDG: THE IMPORTANCE OF MEN’S FRIENDSHIPS
Even if 's the se that homoerotic behavrs might have only bee nmned relatively recent tim (I don't know if that's te or not), that would still leave wh the matter of why there was an uptick homoerotic nmnatn. By that I don't mean that many people haven't engaged somethg remblg homoerotic behavr (like a man kissg a man on the lips) at any pot their life, but rather that I feel we should see otherwise-straight male iends (pecially good iends) kissg each other goodbye (erotilly) every day, or male bsmen engagg some light genal pettg after a meetg to keep up the imprsn of beg a iendly, valuable asset to one another. Kirkpatrick (2000) c a number of studi fdg that around 20% of men (and women, but let's stick to the men for now) report havg homosexual terurse at some pot their liv (though most of this behavr - about two thirds of - seems to take place before the age of 19).
Assumg the numbers are reprentative, that people found all of those enunters erotic even when they were younger children, and that the behavr wasn't erced by others, we would still be lookg at around 4 out of 5 mal who have never engaged homosexual terurse at any pot their life. We uld, as Fleischman, Fsler, & Cholakians (2014) do, expand the fn away om jt homoerotic terurse to behavr that don't clu the genals, but this (a) ns back to the problem that most men don't seem to be kissg their good iends good-bye erotilly and (b) that we should expect behavr that rulted asm to be more rewardg - and th bondg - than non-asmic rults, if I follow the logic here rrectly.
No matter how I try to slice , I keep endg up at the ia that, if homoerotic behavr functns to cement social bonds - that we should be seeg a lot more of terms of prevalence, equency, and tensy. The only way I see to si-step that issue is to suggt homoerotic bondg is a facultative adaptatn: one which rponds to specific environment ntexts.