Is Flirtg Between Gay and Straight Men Okay? | Psychology Today

Contents:

• IS FLIRTG BETWEEN GAY AND STRAIGHT MEN OKAY?
• CAN GAY AND STRAIGHT MEN REALLY BE FRIENDS?
• CAN A STRAIGHT GUY ETHILLY ACCEPT ORAL SEX OM HIS GAY BUDDY?
• GAY MEN AND STRAIGHT MEN AS FRIENDS
• IS YOUR MAN GAY, STRAIGHT, OR BISEXUAL?
• STEP-BY-STEP INSTCTNS FOR SHOOTG YOUR SHOT WH GAY GUYS

IS FLIRTG BETWEEN GAY AND STRAIGHT MEN OKAY?

Of urse, some intify as straight but are realy closeted bisexuals or gays by sexual orientatn—perhaps likely to e out at a later age (if ever). The differenc between gay and straight men are much harr to discern the days, cludg the ways that affectn is shown. It simply don’t matter so much who is gay and who isn’t ( most quarters), and hangg out wh gay men when you are straight is no big al.

CAN GAY AND STRAIGHT MEN REALLY BE FRIENDS?

Asi om the grooms and me, I didn’t know, nor uld I tell after many enunters, who was gay and who was straight. ” It mak sense, a shrewd nice-lookg younger man his charm and don’t happen to re if the teractn is wh a gay man.

Several gay male iends and I somehow started talkg about how gay and straight men teract so differently than they once did (not so long ago). The lson is that everyone n loosen up, pecially gay men who, for so long, have had to be reful about lettg others really know them.

Somehow, the origal “Queer Eye for the Straight Guy” premiered on Bravo two s ago this month, prentg five gay men – each specializg a specific liftyle area – as they scend upon a (ually) heterosexual male subject need of some support, whether was wh clothg choic, groomg, anizatn or perhaps an unrlyg issue around self nfince. It was a novel take on the makeover ncept, not only terms of beg one of the first monstroly succsful programs the then-nascent realm of realy TV, but also one of the first tl to feature not one – but five – gay people as the leads. (For ntext, had only been five years sce the s “Ellen” got nceled, shortly after the ma character played by Ellen DeGener me out as gay.

CAN A STRAIGHT GUY ETHILLY ACCEPT ORAL SEX OM HIS GAY BUDDY?

Krsley agreed, sayg, “We meet people all the time who are probably their thirti now, who say, ‘I me om a very nservative fay, we were very relig, “Gay” was not somethg that was ever spoken about our home, and your show allowed to at least have that nversatn, if not make easier for me to e out. He add that of urse, isn’t only gay people who approach them wh spiratnal msag, and that at the time the origal show aired, the st saw how their visibily as gay people wh a larger straight world was beg received firsthand. “For many people, we were the first real, live, real life gay people that they actually enuntered, ” Krsley observed.

“And we were a very nocuo group of five gay men helpg a straight guy try to get the job, or the look, or the girl. And for those who cricized the origal seri for rercg stereotyp by havg a gay fashnista or bety expert swoop to tidy thgs up, Colls creds his rint foodie Allen for a memorable moment at the show’s first NBC upont Los Angel back 2003, when he faced a slew of reporters and had the perfect retort. “Ted fally grabbed , really grabbed a hold of the answer, which was like, ‘Yeah, we are, as a matter of fact, owng the clich around the fact that gays have a different perspective, have a unique visn and perspective of a lot of different thgs.

GAY MEN AND STRAIGHT MEN AS FRIENDS

McKellan is a gay man who me out 1988, and although 33 years have passed sce he me out, n still be shockg to the world to see such a close same-sex iendship that cross sexual inti. Along wh his supervisor, Robb Travers, he lnched a study that surveyed 350 straight men and 275 gay or bisexual men om across North Ameri. Siar to qutns that loom about whether straight men and women n ever tly be platonic iends, the same qutn lgers over the iendships between gay and straight men.

A bromosexual iendship is a nonsexual iendship between two men, where typilly one iend is gay (or bisexual), and the other is straight. In days past, this may have seemed as unlikely as a iendship between a ln and a moe, given the tradnally high levels of homophobia among straight men. McKie’s rearch reported that straight participants felt that a gay iend ma for the ultimate wgman bee the gay iend uld help to attract prospective partners for the straight iend.

IS YOUR MAN GAY, STRAIGHT, OR BISEXUAL?

Other rearch has shown that women prefer iendships wh gay vers straight men, partly bee the threat or loomg qutn of sexual attractn is renred moot. However, straight men bromosexual iendships have perhaps learned how to harns this ease of iendship between straight women and gay men for their own advantage. McKie noted that the straight men felt their gay iend was able to make succsful troductns to straight women bee the women tsted their gay male iends to troduce them to a good person.

Gay men McKie’s rearch reported that their straight male iends often play the role of ‘matchmaker’ and troduce them to another of their gay iends. The lack of petn for the same prospective partners allows the iendship to flourish a way that may be hred to some gree for gay or straight men iendships wh men who share the same sexual orientatn.

STEP-BY-STEP INSTCTNS FOR SHOOTG YOUR SHOT WH GAY GUYS

For gay men, iendship qualy wh a straight male iend was particularly high when the iendship pre-dated the gay man g out. Straight men also reported havg more emotnally vulnerable nversatns wh their gay iends bee they felt safer to do so, relative to attemptg to discs siar topics wh other straight men. McKie’s rearch found that straight men livg the more central parts of Canada and the Uned Stat were ls likely to report a willgns or tert havg a gay man as a iend.