What to Do When Your Child Says: "I'm Gay" | Psychology Today

Contents:

• ‘I AM GAY – BUT I WASN’T BORN THIS WAY’
• HOW TO RPOND WHEN SOMEONE SAYS, 'I'M GAY'
• AM I GAY?
• WHAT TO DO WHEN YOUR CHILD SAYS: "I'M GAY"
• WHO SAYS I’M GAY? 0.01   1.3K      0 THE WHO SAYS I’M GAY? SOUND BOARD IS GOG VIRAL ON SOCIAL MEDIA AND THE TER. HERE IS THE SOUND BUTTON FOR WHO SAYS I’M GAY? THAT YOU N E FOR MAKG HILAR MEM AND EDG YOUTUBE VIOS AS WELL AS INSTAGRAM REELS, FUNNY MEM, V, AND MORE. DISVER CREDIBLE EE SOUND EFFECTS, MEME SOUNDS, AND FUNNY SOUNDS OM OUR GROWG D LIBRARY TO E YOUR NEXT VIO EDG PROJECT. WHO SAYS I’M GAY? SOUND BOARD MEME IS A LLECTN OF THE FUNNIT AND MOST POPULAR SOUNDS OM THE APP. YOU N E THE SOUNDS YOUR VIOS OR PROJECTS TO MAKE THEM EVEN FUNNIER! WHO SAYS I'M GAY? EFFECT BUTTONWHO SAYS I'M GAY? EFFECT DOWNLOADWHO SAYS I'M GAY? EFFECT SOUND DOWNLOAD DOWNLOAD FOR IPHONE HELLO THERE OBI WAN 0.02   412     1 HELLO THERE- OBI WAN EFFECT BUTTONHELLO THERE- OBI WAN EFFECT DOWNLOADHELLO THERE- OBI WAN EFFECT SOUND DOWNLOAD RAGE SCREAM 0.04   1.3K     9 RAGE SCREAM EFFECT BUTTONRAGE SCREAM EFFECT DOWNLOADRAGE SCREAM EFFECT SOUND DOWNLOAD MISTER V – KOBA LA D 0.08   3.2K     2 MISTER V - KOBA LA D EFFECT BUTTONMISTER V - KOBA LA D EFFECT DOWNLOADMISTER V - KOBA LA D EFFECT SOUND DOWNLOAD THAT GAY SON! 0.01   1.5K     2 THAT GAY SON! EFFECT BUTTONTHAT GAY SON! EFFECT DOWNLOADTHAT GAY SON! EFFECT SOUND DOWNLOAD SUPER MAR JUMPG 0.00   1.5K     11 SUPER MAR JUMPG EFFECT BUTTONSUPER MAR JUMPG EFFECT DOWNLOADSUPER MAR JUMPG EFFECT SOUND DOWNLOAD TIP TO 0.01   2.3K     12 TIP TO EFFECT BUTTONTIP TO EFFECT DOWNLOADTIP TO EFFECT SOUND DOWNLOAD   DISCLAIMER THIS IS A PROMOTNAL WEBSE ONLY, ALL FIL PLACED HERE ARE FOR TRODUCTN PURPOS ONLY. ALL FIL FOUND ON THIS SE HAVE BEEN LLECTED OM VAR SOURC ACROSS THE WEB AND ARE BELIEVED TO BE THE “PUBLIC DOMA”. IF HAVE ANY OTHER ISSU THEN FEEL FREE TO CONTACT US JO
• HOW TO KNOW IF YOU ARE GAY
• WHAT WORDS CAN I SAY TO DECLARE THAT I’M GAY?
• HOW DO I KNOW IF I AM GAY? SIGNS YOU ARE GAY
• WHO SAYS I’M GAY?
• I'M GAY QUOT & SAYGS
• "WHY ARE YOU GAY?" "WHO SAYS I'M GAY?" "YOU ARE GAY", 2022

‘I AM GAY – BUT I WASN’T BORN THIS WAY’

You so obvly nnot be gay, was her implitn, bee this is good was 2006, a full five years before Lady Gaga would set the Born This Way argument atop s unassailable cultural perch, but even then the popular unrstandg of orientatn was that was somethg you were born wh, somethg you uldn’t change.

I me out at a nservative Christian llege the US and was a gay relatnship for around two years wh a basketball player who end up marryg a woman.

HOW TO RPOND WHEN SOMEONE SAYS, 'I'M GAY'

Well, you mt have been gay the whole time, some might thk, and bee of some relig shame, you cid to lie to yourself and experiment wh a girl. But what feels most accurate to say is that I’m gay – but I wasn’t born this people may fd their sir changg directn - and n't jt be explaed as experimentatn (Cred: Ignac Lehmann)In 1977, jt over 10% of Amerins thought gayns was somethg you were born wh, acrdg to Gallup.

Throughout the same perd, the number of Amerins who believe homosexualy is “due to someone’s upbrgg/environment” fell om jt unr 60% to ias reached cril mass pop culture, first wh Lady Gaga’s 2011 Born This Way and one year later wh Macklemore’s Same Love, the chos of which has a gay person sgg “I n’t change even if I tried, even if I wanted to. ” Vios started circulatg on the ter featurg gay people askg straight people “when they chose to be straight. ” Around the same time, the Human Rights Campaign clared unequivolly that “Beg gay is not a choice, ” and to claim that is “giv unwarranted crence to roundly disproven practic such as nversn or reparative therapy.

AM I GAY?

”People who challenge the Born This Way narrative are often st as homophobic, and their thkg is nsired backwardAs Jane Ward not Not Gay: Sex Between Straight Whe Men, what’s tertg about many of the claims is how transparent their speakers are wh their polil motivatns.

“Such statements, ” she wr, “fe blogil acunts wh an obligatory and nearly ercive force, suggtg that anyone who scrib homosexual sire as a choice or social nstctn is playg to the hands of the enemy. ” People who challenge the Born This Way narrative are often st as homophobic, and their thkg is nsired backward – even if they are themselv, for example, Cynthia Nixon of Sex and The Cy fame.

WHAT TO DO WHEN YOUR CHILD SAYS: "I'M GAY"

In a 2012 terview wh New York Tim Magaze, the actrs sually mentned that homosexualy was, for her, a choice.

“I unrstand that for many people ’s not, but for me ’s a choice, and you don’t get to fe my gayns for me.

WHO SAYS I’M GAY? 0.01   1.3K      0 THE WHO SAYS I’M GAY? SOUND BOARD IS GOG VIRAL ON SOCIAL MEDIA AND THE TER. HERE IS THE SOUND BUTTON FOR WHO SAYS I’M GAY? THAT YOU N E FOR MAKG HILAR MEM AND EDG YOUTUBE VIOS AS WELL AS INSTAGRAM REELS, FUNNY MEM, V, AND MORE. DISVER CREDIBLE EE SOUND EFFECTS, MEME SOUNDS, AND FUNNY SOUNDS OM OUR GROWG D LIBRARY TO E YOUR NEXT VIO EDG PROJECT. WHO SAYS I’M GAY? SOUND BOARD MEME IS A LLECTN OF THE FUNNIT AND MOST POPULAR SOUNDS OM THE APP. YOU N E THE SOUNDS YOUR VIOS OR PROJECTS TO MAKE THEM EVEN FUNNIER! WHO SAYS I'M GAY? EFFECT BUTTONWHO SAYS I'M GAY? EFFECT DOWNLOADWHO SAYS I'M GAY? EFFECT SOUND DOWNLOAD DOWNLOAD FOR IPHONE HELLO THERE OBI WAN 0.02   412     1 HELLO THERE- OBI WAN EFFECT BUTTONHELLO THERE- OBI WAN EFFECT DOWNLOADHELLO THERE- OBI WAN EFFECT SOUND DOWNLOAD RAGE SCREAM 0.04   1.3K     9 RAGE SCREAM EFFECT BUTTONRAGE SCREAM EFFECT DOWNLOADRAGE SCREAM EFFECT SOUND DOWNLOAD MISTER V – KOBA LA D 0.08   3.2K     2 MISTER V - KOBA LA D EFFECT BUTTONMISTER V - KOBA LA D EFFECT DOWNLOADMISTER V - KOBA LA D EFFECT SOUND DOWNLOAD THAT GAY SON! 0.01   1.5K     2 THAT GAY SON! EFFECT BUTTONTHAT GAY SON! EFFECT DOWNLOADTHAT GAY SON! EFFECT SOUND DOWNLOAD SUPER MAR JUMPG 0.00   1.5K     11 SUPER MAR JUMPG EFFECT BUTTONSUPER MAR JUMPG EFFECT DOWNLOADSUPER MAR JUMPG EFFECT SOUND DOWNLOAD TIP TO 0.01   2.3K     12 TIP TO EFFECT BUTTONTIP TO EFFECT DOWNLOADTIP TO EFFECT SOUND DOWNLOAD   DISCLAIMER THIS IS A PROMOTNAL WEBSE ONLY, ALL FIL PLACED HERE ARE FOR TRODUCTN PURPOS ONLY. ALL FIL FOUND ON THIS SE HAVE BEEN LLECTED OM VAR SOURC ACROSS THE WEB AND ARE BELIEVED TO BE THE “PUBLIC DOMA”. IF HAVE ANY OTHER ISSU THEN FEEL FREE TO CONTACT US JO

Callg me “idtic” and “patently absurd”, Aravosis wrote, “The gay haters at the relig right uldn’t have wrten any better. ”Gay rights do not have to hge on a geic explanatn for sexualy (Cred: Ignac Lehmann)For Aravosis, and many gay activists like him, the public will only accept and affirm gay people if they thk they were born gay.

Patrick Grzanka, Assistant Profsor of Psychology at Universy of Tennsee, for stance, has shown that some people who believe that homosexualy is nate still hold negative views of gays. In fact, the homophobic and non-homophobic rponnts he studied shared siar levels of belief a Born This Way Samantha Allen not at The Daily Beast, the growg public support for gays and lbians has grown out of proportn wh the rise the number of people who believe homosexualy is fixed at birth; would be unlikely that this small change opn uld expla the spike support for gay marriage, for stance. Instead, she suggts hg on the fact that far more people are now personally acquated wh someone who is gay.

In 1985, only 24% of Amerin rponnts said they had a gay iend, relative or -worker —  2013, that number was at 75%. “It don’t seem to matter as much whether or not people believe that gay people are born that way as do that they simply know someone who is currently gay, ” Allen spe of the studi, those who ph agast Born This Way narrativ have been heavily cricised by gay activists. Siarly, Ward has received her own hatemail for phg agast the lg LGB narrativ, wh some gays tellg her she’s “worse than Ann Coulter, ” the ntroversial US thor of books like If Democrats Had Any Bras, They’d Be Republins.

HOW TO KNOW IF YOU ARE GAY

And when I published my say on choosg to be gay, an irate Amerin lbian activist wrote me that had “jt been nfirmed” to her that my wrg was “directly rponsible for four gay aths Rsia. There is a unanimo opn that gay “nversn therapy” should be rejectedLet’s first be clear that whatever the origs of our sexual orientatn, there is a unanimo opn that gay “nversn therapy” should be rejected. The efforts are potentially harmful, acrdg to the APA, “bee they prent the view that the sexual orientatn of lbian, gay and bisexual youth is a mental illns of disorr, and they often ame the abily to change one’s sexual orientatn as a personal and moral failure.

— but bee they’re qutn of what leads to homosexualy the first place, however, is obscure, even to the experts. The APA, for example, while notg that most people experience ltle to no choice over their orientatns, says this of homosexualy’s origs:“Although much rearch has examed the possible geic, hormonal, velopmental, social and cultural fluenc on sexual orientatn, no fdgs have emerged that perm scientists to nclu that sexual orientatn is termed by any particular factor or factors.

”Siarly, the Amerin Psychiatric Associatn wr a 2013 statement that while the of heterosexualy and homosexualy are currently unknown, they are likely “multifactorial cludg blogil and behavral roots which may vary between different dividuals and may even vary over time. ”Te, var eye-grabbg headl over the years have claimed that some scientists have found somethg like The Gay Gene. ” Acrdg to LeVay’s rearch, a specific part of the bra, the third terstial nucls of the anterr hypothalam (INAH-3), is smaller homosexual men than is heterosexual as they might, scientists have stggled to inty any particular gen that nsistently predict the directns of our love and sire (Cred: Ignac Lehmann)Read moreYou n spot the problem wh this study a e away: were the gay bras LeVay studied born that way, or did they bee that way?

WHAT WORDS CAN I SAY TO DECLARE THAT I’M GAY?

Another landmark paper on the origs of homosexualy was published 1993 by a geicist named Dean Hamer, who was terted to learn whether homosexualy uld be hered. Begng om his observatn that there are more gay relativ on a mother’s si than a father’s, Hamer turned his attentn to the X chromosome (which is passed on by the mother).

HOW DO I KNOW IF I AM GAY? SIGNS YOU ARE GAY

”A 2015 study sought to nfirm Hamer’s fdgs, this time wh a much larger sample: 409 pairs of gay brothers. ”And as Allen pots out, there have also been studi that found no “X-lked gene unrlyg male homosexualy. Bis the dividual criqu leveled agast each new study announcg some gay gene disvery, there are major methodologil cricisms to make about the entire enterprise general, as Grzanka pots out: “If we look at the raveno pursu, particularly among Amerin scientists, to fd a gay gene, what we see is that the ncln has already been arrived at.

”The other problem wh Born This Way science is summed up nicely by Simon Copland: “Scientists are askg whether homosexualy is natural when we n’t even agree exactly what homosexualy is.

” Our sir may exprs themselv many different ways that do not all nform to existg notns of ‘gay’, ‘straight’ or ‘bisexual’ is one of the bt takeaways of Ward’s Not Gay, a peratg analysis of sex between straight whe men. Gay men make up only a actn of the US populatn — yet Ward says that there are many men not clud that number who engage homosexual behavr. That’s bee terms like ‘heterosexual’ and ‘straight’ and ‘bisexual’ and ‘gay’ e wh all sorts of cultural baggage attached.

WHO SAYS I’M GAY?

Ccially, she argu, “whether or not this baggage is appealg is a separate matter altogether om the appeal of homosexual or heterosexual sex. ”Gay or not, our sir are oriented and re-oriented throughout our liv (Cred: Ignac Lehmann)In fact, the straight-intified men Ward studied for her book sometim found themselv suatns that sparked the sire for homosexual sex: aterni, ployments, public rtrooms, etc. Ward thks this qutn is the next ontier of queer I first said I chose to be gay, a queer Amerin journalist challenged me to name the time and date of my choice.

I’m claimg that at some pot durg llege, my sexual and romantic sir beme reoriented toward menThkg back to my llege romanc wh women and men, I n beg to unrstand how my own experienc might have helped me to ‘cultivate’ my sire for homosexualy. I want to be very clear: I’m not claimg I simply began to ‘grow to’ my homosexualy, or that as I beme more fortable wh beg gay, I allowed myself the eedom to exprs what had always been latent wh me. “Limg our unrstandg of any plex human experience is always gog to be worse than allowg to be plited, ” he gay rights activists pared sexualy to relign - a ccial part of our life that we should be ee to practise however we like (Cred: Ignac Lehamann)So what are we to do wh the Born This Way rhetoric?

I'M GAY QUOT & SAYGS

Sendly, the entire search for a gay gene is predited upon the assumptn that homosexualy is not the natural or ‘flt’ state of a velopg human. “That’s a very narrow unrstandg of what jtice looks like, ” says about the ncern that homophob will want to ‘enurage’ gay people to be straight if there’s no blogil basis for sexualy?

Is not equally te that ‘fdg a gay gene’ might spire the same homophob to ‘fd a cure’ for homosexuals? It don’t take too much creativy to image a scenar which homophobic parents, upon beg rmed their fet has ‘the gay gene’, choose what to them may seem the lser of two evils: abortn. ”Acrdg to surveys, ls than half of Generatn Z intify as "100% heterosexual", suggtg more and more people have embraced their sexual fluidy (Cred: Ignac Lehmann)Perhaps is time to look to the begng of the gay rights movement.

"WHY ARE YOU GAY?" "WHO SAYS I'M GAY?" "YOU ARE GAY", 2022

“Then there was a shift, and the lears of the movement chose to jump on board wh a ls nuanced argument that people already unrstood: jt like race, people are born wh their homosexualy. Some experts have even started g tegori like ‘mostly straight’ and ‘mostly gay’ to try and expand our limed ways of viewg human sexualy. ” Rponnts were asked to rate themselv on a sle om zero (which signified “pletely straight”) to six (“pletely homosexual”).

More than a third chose a number between one and rponse to the poll, one of my Facebook iends quipped about how natural selectn mt be workg overtime, what wh makg all of gay! I’m thankful for a new generatn that is pable of imagg sexualy a way that transcends the gay/straight bary, that uldn’t re ls about what happened to their bodi and mds to make them who they are today.

Bass backs a wi variety of mpaigns and anizatns, cludg the Natnal Space Society, uBid For Hurrine Relief, and the Gay, Lbian and Straight Edutn Network.