Gay Like Me: A Father Wr to His Son by Richie Jackson | Goodreads

Contents:

• GAY LIKE ME: A FATHER WR TO HIS SON
• GAY LIKE ME: RICHIE JACKSON'S IMPORTANT NEW BOOK WAS WRTEN FOR HIS SON
• GAY LIKE ME
• RICHIE JACKSON ON POLIL SIGNIFINCE OF HIS MEMOIR ‘GAY LIKE ME’
• GAY LIKE ME QUOT
• GAY LIKE ME: A FATHER WR TO HIS SON HARDVER – 1 JANUARY 2065
• DBOOK GAY LIKE ME: A FATHER WR TO HIS SON
• SHOP SUAL WGIRL-SPIRED OUTFS FOR FALLOPEN MENUVIOSHOPCULTUREFAYWELLNSFOODLIVGSTYLETRAVELNEWSBOOK CLUBGMA3: WYNTKNEWSLETTERPRIVACY POLICYYOUR US STATE PRIVACY RIGHTSCHILDREN'S ONLE PRIVACY POLICYINTERT-BASED ADSTERMS OF USEDO NOT SELL MY INFOCONTACT USCOPYRIGHT © 2023 ABC NEWS INTER VENTUR. ALL RIGHTS RERVED.SEARCHLIVGFATHER OPENS UP ABOUT G OUT TO HIS 3 SONS: I'M STILL THE SAME DAD AS BEFORE3:16FATHER OPENS UP ABOUT G OUT TO HIS BYGOOD MORNG AMERIJUNE 15, 2023, 4:18 AM"GOOD MORNG AMERI" IS FEATURG STORI CELEBRATN OF PRI MONTH. STT TAKACS, A 46-YEAR-OLD AND FATHER OF THREE, PENNED A PERSONAL SAY ABOUT HIS EXPERIENCE G OUT AS A GAY MAN TO HIS SONS. READ ABOUT HIS JOURNEY BELOW HIS OWN WORDS.COMG OUT AT 42 I WAS 42 YEARS OLD WHEN I ME OUT TO MY WIFE. IT WAS 15 MONTHS LATER THAT I STARTED THAT SAME NVERSATN WH MY THREE BOYS -- 9-YEAR-OLD TWS AND AN 11-YEAR-OLD.THE WHOLE EXPERIENCE IS SOMEWHAT OF A BLUR, MOSTLY PART TO THE FACT THAT AT THAT POT MY LIFE THERE WAS A LOT OF CHANGE HAPPENG AND SOME SIGNIFINT PENT-UP EMOTNS. THERE WASN'T MUCH OF A PLAN, NO GUIBOOK HAND, ONLY GOALS THAT I HOPED MY BOYS WOULD START THE PROCS OF UNRSTANDG AND ACCEPTG THEIR DAD FOR WHOM I TLY WAS: A GAY MAN.STT TAKACSGMA IT HAD BEEN A LONG 15 MONTHS SCE G OUT TO MY WIFE, AN EXPERIENCE I UNFORTUNATELY WOULDN'T SCRIBE AS POSIVE, FUN OR SOMETHG I EVER WANT TO REPEAT. IT WAS WROUGHT WH THE HAPPS OF FALLY TELLG THE CLOST PERSON MY TE INTY, WHILE SIMULTANEOLY RIPPG HER WORLD OUT OM UNR HER. WH MANY EMOTNS AND STRS, I ACCEPTED HER REQUT TO KEEP THE REASON FOR OUR DIVORCE -- DUE TO ME BEG GAY -- A SECRET FOR AT LEAST ANOTHER YEAR. THIS CLUD KEEPG OM OUR KIDS AND HER SI OF THE FAY.WHEN THE MOMENT TO BREAK THE NEWS TO MY KIDS FALLY ME, I HAD A LOT OF ISSU TO NAVIGATE. OVER 15 MONTHS, I HAD FALIZED THE DIVORCE, MOVED AGA AND TAKEN A NEW JOB BASED CHIGO, 250 AWAY OM MY BOYS. THE DISTANCE WAS TO CREATE SOME SPACE BETWEEN MY NOW EX-WIFE, WHO STGGLED BEG PROXIMY TO ME.I HAD CID I NEED TO BE SAFE, EE OF THE STRS AND EMOTNALLY SANE TO BE A GOOD FATHER TO MY BOYS, EVEN IF THAT MEANT TRANSNG OM EVERY VOLVED DAD DAY-TO-DAY TO A DAY SHUTTLG BETWEEN CHIGO AND THE SUBURBS OF DETRO MULTIPL TIM A MONTH. CHIGO OFFERED THE STABILY I NEED A JOB, IENDSHIP AND AT THIS POT, A NEW RELATNSHIP THAT ALL NTRIBUTED TO MY HEALG THIS NEW GAY WORLD.STT WH HIS IENDS.COURTY JOE KOECHERWE WERE ALL ADJTG TO A NEW, MORN FAY, MORE LIKE A FAY TRANSN. HOMOSEXUALY WASN'T A TOPIC WELL DISCSED OUR FAY. IT WASN'T NECSARILY A BAD TOPIC, JT WASN'T DISCSED. GAY IENDS WERE JT IENDS -- RPECTED BUT THEIR RELATNSHIPS NOT NECSARILY DISCSED. GAY MARRIAGE WAS THE NEWS, BUT NOT DISCSED OUR HOE OTHER THAN THE OCSNAL NEGATIVE MENT OM A CLOSE RELATIVE.A 'NEW MORN-FAY'STT'S MOTHER WH HIS THREE SONS.COURTY STT TACKACS MY KIDS ATTEND A VERY NSERVATIVE, PRIVATE CHRISTIAN SCHOOL. WE CHOSE THE SCHOOL BEE WE WANTED TO GIVE OUR KIDS ACCS TO THE BT TN AND A STRONG FOUNDATN TO TAKE ON THE WORLD. IN MANY WAYS, A LOVG PLACE FOR THEM, BUT I ME TO REALIZE THAT TEACHERS SPOKE OPENLY AGAST GAY CULTURE AND TEXTBOOKS LABELED HOMOSEXUALY AS SFUL AND EVIL. MY KIDS LISTENED AND FOLLOWED THEIR LEAD.EVEN PRR TO G OUT, WAS HARD FOR ME TO HEAR MY KIDS E HOME WH STORI OF TEACHERS GRADG GAY MARRIAGE OR GAY PEOPLE, TO SEE THEIR WORKBOOKS, RERCG THE BIAS AGAST BEG GAY. I DID MY BT TO ENURAGE MY KIDS TO UNRSTAND THAT GOD MA EVERYONE JT THE WAY THEY WERE SUPPOSED TO BE, AND THAT GOD LOV EVERYONE.I HAD TO TEMPER MY WORDS WHEN SUATNS ME UP WH MY KIDS' TN, OUT OF FEAR WOULD DISPT THEIR EXPERIENCE SCHOOL. THE LAST THG I WANTED WAS FOR MY KIDS TO BE TREATED DIFFERENTLY BEE THEY HAD A GAY DAD, WHICH I FELT WAS A POSSIBILY.IN THE YEAR FOLLOWG MY DIVORCE, I AGREED NOT TO TELL THE KIDS I WAS GAY, SO I HAD TO BE REFUL. WHEN I BROUGHT THE KIDS TO CHIGO, WE STAYED A HOTEL AND NOT AT THE HOME I SHARED WH MY BOYIEND. THE MAN I WAS DATG WAS JT A IEND. WE WERE REFUL TO AVOID REFERENC TO "GAY" DISCSNS AND PLAC, ALTHOUGH I LIVED THE GAYBORHOOD OF CHIGO, AN UPSLE, PREDOMANTLY GAY AREA ON CHIGO'S NORTH SI.'SRY'TELLG MY KIDS WAS SRY. I WASN'T SURE WHAT TO EXPECT. THEY HAD ALREADY MET MY BOYIEND MULTIPLE TIM BY THAT POT AND HAD BEE IENDS WH HIM.I STARTED WH MY OLST SON AND THEN EVENTUALLY HIS YOUNGER BROTHERS.THE OLST TOOK THE NEWS THE HARST, AS I EXPECTED. HE WAS A FEW YEARS AHEAD OF HIS BROTHERS BEG DOCTRATED BY HIS SCHOOL AGAST HOMOSEXUALY. ANGRY ABOUT THE DIVORCE, HE ACTED OUT AGAST HIS MOM AND ME. HE WAS FIANT AT TIM AND GENERALLY EMBARRASSED ABOUT HIS GAY DAD. HE DIDN'T WANT HIS IENDS TO KNOW AND WAS SRED I MIGHT DO SOMETHG TO CLUE THEM . HE WAS AAID HE WOULD BE TEASED.THE TWS' REACTN WAS MORE MUTED. THEY WERE TOO YOUNG TO UNRSTAND THE NCEPT AND DIDN'T SEEM TO RE AS MUCH. IT WAS MORE OF -- "OK, DAD, LET'S TALK ABOUT SOMETHG ELSE."STT AND HIS TWO 9-YEAR-OLD TW SONS.COURTY STT TACKACS 'HE LOV ME, BUT HE DON'T SUPPORT MY LIFTYLE'I TRIED TO ASSURE MY SONS THAT DAD WAS THE SAME DAD TO THEM I WAS BEFORE. I TRIED TO RERCED THE G-OUT NCEPT TERMS I FELT THEY WOULD UNRSTAND FOR THEIR AGE SCE RELATNSHIP AND SEXUAL LOVE WASN'T SOMETHG THEY UNRSTOOD YET. EVENTUALLY, THOUGH, THAT STARTED TO PASS.AFTER FOUR YEARS, MY OLST SON'S IENDS KNEW HE HAD A GAY DAD, AND, TO PUT TEENAGE TERMS, WASN'T SO BAD. HE IS STILL EMBARRASSED BY THE WHOLE THG ON SOME LEVEL. HE LOV ME, BUT HE DON'T SUPPORT MY LIFTYLE. I THK HE UNRSTANDS BEG GAY ISN'T A CHOICE ANYMORE, AND I BELIEVE THAT WILL NTUE.MY EX-WIFE CERTALY BORE THE BNT OF THE DAY-TO-DAY WH THE KIDS. SHE STILL DO, AND I KNOW 'S STILL NOT EASY. I DO MY BT TO TRY TO REMA ENGAGED OM A DISTANCE, OFFERG AS MUCH HELP WH THGS LIKE DOCTOR APPOTMENTS, HAIRCUTS, BUYG SHO AND CLOTH, RERCG THEM CLEANG THEIR ROOM AS MUCH AS I ULD.MY WEEKEND VISS WH THE KIDS ULD BE SCRIBED, STILL, AS DRIVG 100 AROUND THE SUBURBS NNG ERRANDS WH THE BOYS, HAVG FUN AND TRYG TO MAKE MEMORABLE EXPERIENC WH THEM.STT WH HIS SISTER AND CHILDRENCOURTY STT TAKACSI HAVE WORKED VERY HARD TO STAY NNECTED TO THE BOYS, AND 'S NOT EASY. CALLG EVERY DAY BEFORE SCHOOL TO WISH THEM OFF, LLG TWO TO THREE TIM AFTER SCHOOL, AND FACETIMG THEM OFTEN. I STILL DRIVE BACK AND FORTH TO MICHIGAN MULTIPLE TIM A MONTH, RACKG UP 1,500 TO 2,000 A MONTH.DON'T HI THE TTHWHAT I'VE LEARNED IS THAT THIS PROCS TAK TIME. I HAD MORE THAN 25 YEARS TO E TO TERMS WH MY INTY, AND THK I EXPECTED THOSE CLOST TO ME WOULD ADJT QUICKLY. THAT'S SIMPLY NOT REALISTIC.FOR THOSE GOG THROUGH THE SAME PROCS: GIVE YOUR WIFE (EX) THE SPACE AND TIME SHE NEEDS TO PROCS THE CHANG, LOVE YOUR KIDS WH ALL YOUR HEART AND BE HONT WH THEM ABOUT THE CHANG.DON'T HI THE TTH ONCE 'S OUT. ONE OF MY BIGGT REGRETS IS NOT TELLG EVERYONE MY FAY AT THE SAME TIME, LYG ABOUT THE REASON WE DIVORCED. I WISH I HAD NOT AGREED TO THAT, BUT ALSO UNRSTAND AT THE TIME SEEMED LIKE MA SENSE.I DON'T REGRET THE PATH I WENT DOWN. I STILL BELIEVE WAS GOD'S PLAN THE WAY THGS HAVE GONE; HAD THEY NOT, I WOULDN'T HAVE HAD 20 GOOD YEARS WH MY NOW EX-WIFE, AND I WOULDN'T HAVE THREE AWOME BOYS. I WOULDN'T TRA THAT FOR ANYTHG.MY WISH IS THAT THGS WILL NTUE TO REANIZE AND ONE DAY WE'LL ALL LOOK BACK AT 2014 AND 'LL JT BE ANOTHER FLECTN POTS OUR LIFE.I HELPED START A GROUP FOR GAY FATHERS CHIGO AND HAS SHOWN ME THAT THERE ARE OTHER GAY FATHERS AHEAD OF ME THEIR G-OUT JOURNEY WH POSIVE EXPERIENC TO SHARE. AFTER YEARS OF HARD WORK, THEY HAVE MARRIED MEN, THEIR EX HAVE MARRIED AS WELL, AND THEY ALL ENJOY VATNS, BIRTHDAYS, AND SHARE THE JOY OF THEIR CHILDREN LIKE ONE, BIG, MORN FAY.STT, HIS PARTNER, JOE, AND HIS THREE SONS.COURTY STT TAKACSTHIS STORY WAS ORIGALLY PUBLISHED JUNE 19, 2018.RELATED TOPICSLGBTQUP NEXT LIVG—BRI SHAR MOM'S HILAR WEDDG PHOTO BOOK FAILAUGT 29, 2023LOOK UP! AUGT'S 'BLUE SUPERMOON' WON'T BE SEEN AGA UNTIL 2037AUGT 29, 2023DISNEY AND MAKE-A-WISH REACH 150,000 WISH GRANTED AT ONCE UPON A WISH PARTYAUGT 28, 2023HOW WBOYS, NSTCTN CREWS AND A NOE CLUB KEPT OTHER MI FIR OM BEG 'ANOTHER LAHAA'AUGT 25, 2023UP NEXT LIVG—BRI SHAR MOM'S HILAR WEDDG PHOTO BOOK FAILAUGT 29, 2023LOOK UP! AUGT'S 'BLUE SUPERMOON' WON'T BE SEEN AGA UNTIL 2037AUGT 29, 2023DISNEY AND MAKE-A-WISH REACH 150,000 WISH GRANTED AT ONCE UPON A WISH PARTYAUGT 28, 2023HOW WBOYS, NSTCTN CREWS AND A NOE CLUB KEPT OTHER MI FIR OM BEG 'ANOTHER LAHAA'AUGT 25, 2023

GAY LIKE ME: A FATHER WR TO HIS SON

DuBois quote about the black experience, orr to scribe the [whe] gay experience, while failg to talk even once about whe privilege the LGBT muny is upsettg. In fact, Richie Jackson's "Gay Like Me" left me wonrg: if a gay father is wrg a letter about "beg gay" to his gay son 2020, is irrponsible to rema silent on the ways which whe gays have gaed numero privileg while their trans and PoC siblgs have not?

Wrten as a long form letter to his llege-aged gay son, "Gay Like Me" is a memoir-meets-epistle that reunts the numero stggl members of the LGBT muny have faced om the AIDS crisis through the current Tmp princy. Much of this is admirable, and I, for one, am thankful for the activism and work Jackson did his own time ACT UP and wh other anizatns anizg for our issue, though, is that his book fails to analyze the ways which he, himself, as a whe, wealthy, gay man, also experienc a vast amount privilege that buffers him om the experienc of members of the LGBT muny who aren't as lucky. That's not a crique; 's a historil fact), and nversatns that jt don't seem to want to acknowledge that anizatns like the HRC and people like Pete Buttigieg, while certaly beg nomally gay, actually stand for polil posns that negatively impact a lot of non-whe, non-cis, and non-male queer people.

GAY LIKE ME: RICHIE JACKSON'S IMPORTANT NEW BOOK WAS WRTEN FOR HIS SON

" In this book, wrten by a gay father to his gay son, he says, "It's a cel world out there and you have to be reful. He thks gay people should always be gay, bee we have our enemi and any sort of progrs n easily be taken away. Multiple tim he rhetoric and quot directly om black liberatn movements, and jt appli the exact same thg to gayns??

GAY LIKE ME

All-lgbtq tob-memoir528 reviewsFebary 1, 2020If I had to pare this book to another, I would say ’s siar to “Between the World and Me” by Ta-Nehisi Coat but a gay man wrg to his gay son, stctg him how to survive a straight world.

◾︎380 reviews31 followersJune 19, 2021An important book markg the generatns between father and son om a gay male perspective. Hont, btal, tenr, lovg, polil - this book clearly scrib the world younger gay men face never sugar atg. This book lovgly and telligently lays out one man's journey, fg his generatn for his teenage gay son.

I'm glad this gay dad is wrg to his gay son about his life, and his work to make the world more clive.

RICHIE JACKSON ON POLIL SIGNIFINCE OF HIS MEMOIR ‘GAY LIKE ME’

His inty is pletely vted his beg gay, which I unrstand, but he is very obliv other 's so irrponsible to nflate the experienc of cis gays and trans people, pecially sce trans people are statistilly more at-risk when to hate crim and siar suatns.

The name-checkg of Pete Buttigieg, while not acknowledgg all the harm Buttigieg has done as a fellow gay whe man, really mak this clear. If you're lookg for a super-basic oversharg om a whe gay father to a biracial gay son, this is that, but hs all the not lgbtq memoirs 533 reviews15 followersFebary 26, 2020Richie Jackson is the award-wng talent manager and producer of the h televisn show, Nurse Jackie, as well as other Broadway plays, films, and televisn shows. When the baby need a blood transfn a uple months later, Jackson wr his son that “bee BD and I are gay, we were prohibed by US Food and Dg Admistratn regulatns to be your blood donor…bee we were gay we uldn’t take re of you the way you need to be taken re of, the way we had pledged to take re of you.

A smackdown when we were already down—one son ad, one son cril ndn who may not survive…Jt a few months old and you were already nonted wh gay prejudice. ”Gay Like Me is Jackson’s letter to his gay son, a book-length letter which he reflects upon gay inty, history, and culture as he prepar his son to live as a gay man a untry that “don’t want you, don’t accept you, is systematilly attemptg to erase you. Wrg about his own g out experience, Jackson remds his son that even though gay persons are now visible, “our new mastream inty…is a false salve.

GAY LIKE ME QUOT

”Jackson then wr his son that “your nfint attu about beg gay when you say your generatn jt don’t thk is a “big al” greatly ncerns me.

I am aaid that you aren’t aware of what tak to be an out gay man a society that ems you as ls than others, of the fortu, stama, and perseverance need to live a safe, fulfillg, and priful life of gay self-teem a world that is tryg to erase you. ” He go on to say that one way to celebrate that otherns which “breeds empathy, embolns ias, and expands boundari” is to see what gay artists and wrers have unrstood about beg gay a straight tells him to look at the art of Keh Harg and Robert Mapplethorpe, to see plays like Angels Ameri, and to read books by Jam Baldw and Andrew Holleran. ”Though each chapter of this short book v reflectn, when I read this sectn of Gay Like Me, I thought about what happens when I read.

” Thkg about Jackson’s words to his son remds me why I read so much lerature by gay thors and why I vour movi that reprent and acknowledge my humans we all have much mon. It is the arts that nourish as we disver ourselv and how to live to the wrg about fay, iendship, love, sex, AIDS, grief, parentg, polics, anger, and more, the thor has wrten a love letter to rm and empower his gay son.

GAY LIKE ME: A FATHER WR TO HIS SON HARDVER – 1 JANUARY 2065

He has also wrten to bridge two generatns: one which fought to brg gay life out of the shadows and one that seems placent and unprepared for LGBTQ life Jackson wrote Gay Like Me as a letter to his son, he has wrten a letter for all gay men across the generatns. He has also wrten a letter that will help those who are straight better unrstand the people their life who are gay men.

Bgraphy-tobgraphy-memoir historil-fictn rmatnal312 reviews12 followersOctober 3, 2022“Gay Like Me” is treatise on how to be a rich, whe, privileged, gay man. For stance, Jackson picks the term “openly gay” apart and twists s meang until ’s an unregnizable ball of homophobia.

DBOOK GAY LIKE ME: A FATHER WR TO HIS SON

Last, Jackson’s tailg of preparg his son wh “gay geography” wasn’t jt another crgeworthy moment, also highlighted how out of touch Jackson is wh opportuny and abily of the LGBTQ muny to be mobile and explore other parts of the untry outsi his/her/their backyard. Some LGBTQ folks won’t ever need a lson “gay geography” bee they’ll never leave the radi of their home cy.

SHOP SUAL WGIRL-SPIRED OUTFS FOR FALLOPEN MENUVIOSHOPCULTUREFAYWELLNSFOODLIVGSTYLETRAVELNEWSBOOK CLUBGMA3: WYNTKNEWSLETTERPRIVACY POLICYYOUR US STATE PRIVACY RIGHTSCHILDREN'S ONLE PRIVACY POLICYINTERT-BASED ADSTERMS OF USEDO NOT SELL MY INFOCONTACT USCOPYRIGHT © 2023 ABC NEWS INTER VENTUR. ALL RIGHTS RERVED.SEARCHLIVGFATHER OPENS UP ABOUT G OUT TO HIS 3 SONS: I'M STILL THE SAME DAD AS BEFORE3:16FATHER OPENS UP ABOUT G OUT TO HIS BYGOOD MORNG AMERIJUNE 15, 2023, 4:18 AM"GOOD MORNG AMERI" IS FEATURG STORI CELEBRATN OF PRI MONTH. STT TAKACS, A 46-YEAR-OLD AND FATHER OF THREE, PENNED A PERSONAL SAY ABOUT HIS EXPERIENCE G OUT AS A GAY MAN TO HIS SONS. READ ABOUT HIS JOURNEY BELOW HIS OWN WORDS.COMG OUT AT 42 I WAS 42 YEARS OLD WHEN I ME OUT TO MY WIFE. IT WAS 15 MONTHS LATER THAT I STARTED THAT SAME NVERSATN WH MY THREE BOYS -- 9-YEAR-OLD TWS AND AN 11-YEAR-OLD.THE WHOLE EXPERIENCE IS SOMEWHAT OF A BLUR, MOSTLY PART TO THE FACT THAT AT THAT POT MY LIFE THERE WAS A LOT OF CHANGE HAPPENG AND SOME SIGNIFINT PENT-UP EMOTNS. THERE WASN'T MUCH OF A PLAN, NO GUIBOOK HAND, ONLY GOALS THAT I HOPED MY BOYS WOULD START THE PROCS OF UNRSTANDG AND ACCEPTG THEIR DAD FOR WHOM I TLY WAS: A GAY MAN.STT TAKACSGMA IT HAD BEEN A LONG 15 MONTHS SCE G OUT TO MY WIFE, AN EXPERIENCE I UNFORTUNATELY WOULDN'T SCRIBE AS POSIVE, FUN OR SOMETHG I EVER WANT TO REPEAT. IT WAS WROUGHT WH THE HAPPS OF FALLY TELLG THE CLOST PERSON MY TE INTY, WHILE SIMULTANEOLY RIPPG HER WORLD OUT OM UNR HER. WH MANY EMOTNS AND STRS, I ACCEPTED HER REQUT TO KEEP THE REASON FOR OUR DIVORCE -- DUE TO ME BEG GAY -- A SECRET FOR AT LEAST ANOTHER YEAR. THIS CLUD KEEPG OM OUR KIDS AND HER SI OF THE FAY.WHEN THE MOMENT TO BREAK THE NEWS TO MY KIDS FALLY ME, I HAD A LOT OF ISSU TO NAVIGATE. OVER 15 MONTHS, I HAD FALIZED THE DIVORCE, MOVED AGA AND TAKEN A NEW JOB BASED CHIGO, 250 AWAY OM MY BOYS. THE DISTANCE WAS TO CREATE SOME SPACE BETWEEN MY NOW EX-WIFE, WHO STGGLED BEG PROXIMY TO ME.I HAD CID I NEED TO BE SAFE, EE OF THE STRS AND EMOTNALLY SANE TO BE A GOOD FATHER TO MY BOYS, EVEN IF THAT MEANT TRANSNG OM EVERY VOLVED DAD DAY-TO-DAY TO A DAY SHUTTLG BETWEEN CHIGO AND THE SUBURBS OF DETRO MULTIPL TIM A MONTH. CHIGO OFFERED THE STABILY I NEED A JOB, IENDSHIP AND AT THIS POT, A NEW RELATNSHIP THAT ALL NTRIBUTED TO MY HEALG THIS NEW GAY WORLD.STT WH HIS IENDS.COURTY JOE KOECHERWE WERE ALL ADJTG TO A NEW, MORN FAY, MORE LIKE A FAY TRANSN. HOMOSEXUALY WASN'T A TOPIC WELL DISCSED OUR FAY. IT WASN'T NECSARILY A BAD TOPIC, JT WASN'T DISCSED. GAY IENDS WERE JT IENDS -- RPECTED BUT THEIR RELATNSHIPS NOT NECSARILY DISCSED. GAY MARRIAGE WAS THE NEWS, BUT NOT DISCSED OUR HOE OTHER THAN THE OCSNAL NEGATIVE MENT OM A CLOSE RELATIVE.A 'NEW MORN-FAY'STT'S MOTHER WH HIS THREE SONS.COURTY STT TACKACS MY KIDS ATTEND A VERY NSERVATIVE, PRIVATE CHRISTIAN SCHOOL. WE CHOSE THE SCHOOL BEE WE WANTED TO GIVE OUR KIDS ACCS TO THE BT TN AND A STRONG FOUNDATN TO TAKE ON THE WORLD. IN MANY WAYS, A LOVG PLACE FOR THEM, BUT I ME TO REALIZE THAT TEACHERS SPOKE OPENLY AGAST GAY CULTURE AND TEXTBOOKS LABELED HOMOSEXUALY AS SFUL AND EVIL. MY KIDS LISTENED AND FOLLOWED THEIR LEAD.EVEN PRR TO G OUT, WAS HARD FOR ME TO HEAR MY KIDS E HOME WH STORI OF TEACHERS GRADG GAY MARRIAGE OR GAY PEOPLE, TO SEE THEIR WORKBOOKS, RERCG THE BIAS AGAST BEG GAY. I DID MY BT TO ENURAGE MY KIDS TO UNRSTAND THAT GOD MA EVERYONE JT THE WAY THEY WERE SUPPOSED TO BE, AND THAT GOD LOV EVERYONE.I HAD TO TEMPER MY WORDS WHEN SUATNS ME UP WH MY KIDS' TN, OUT OF FEAR WOULD DISPT THEIR EXPERIENCE SCHOOL. THE LAST THG I WANTED WAS FOR MY KIDS TO BE TREATED DIFFERENTLY BEE THEY HAD A GAY DAD, WHICH I FELT WAS A POSSIBILY.IN THE YEAR FOLLOWG MY DIVORCE, I AGREED NOT TO TELL THE KIDS I WAS GAY, SO I HAD TO BE REFUL. WHEN I BROUGHT THE KIDS TO CHIGO, WE STAYED A HOTEL AND NOT AT THE HOME I SHARED WH MY BOYIEND. THE MAN I WAS DATG WAS JT A IEND. WE WERE REFUL TO AVOID REFERENC TO "GAY" DISCSNS AND PLAC, ALTHOUGH I LIVED THE GAYBORHOOD OF CHIGO, AN UPSLE, PREDOMANTLY GAY AREA ON CHIGO'S NORTH SI.'SRY'TELLG MY KIDS WAS SRY. I WASN'T SURE WHAT TO EXPECT. THEY HAD ALREADY MET MY BOYIEND MULTIPLE TIM BY THAT POT AND HAD BEE IENDS WH HIM.I STARTED WH MY OLST SON AND THEN EVENTUALLY HIS YOUNGER BROTHERS.THE OLST TOOK THE NEWS THE HARST, AS I EXPECTED. HE WAS A FEW YEARS AHEAD OF HIS BROTHERS BEG DOCTRATED BY HIS SCHOOL AGAST HOMOSEXUALY. ANGRY ABOUT THE DIVORCE, HE ACTED OUT AGAST HIS MOM AND ME. HE WAS FIANT AT TIM AND GENERALLY EMBARRASSED ABOUT HIS GAY DAD. HE DIDN'T WANT HIS IENDS TO KNOW AND WAS SRED I MIGHT DO SOMETHG TO CLUE THEM . HE WAS AAID HE WOULD BE TEASED.THE TWS' REACTN WAS MORE MUTED. THEY WERE TOO YOUNG TO UNRSTAND THE NCEPT AND DIDN'T SEEM TO RE AS MUCH. IT WAS MORE OF -- "OK, DAD, LET'S TALK ABOUT SOMETHG ELSE."STT AND HIS TWO 9-YEAR-OLD TW SONS.COURTY STT TACKACS 'HE LOV ME, BUT HE DON'T SUPPORT MY LIFTYLE'I TRIED TO ASSURE MY SONS THAT DAD WAS THE SAME DAD TO THEM I WAS BEFORE. I TRIED TO RERCED THE G-OUT NCEPT TERMS I FELT THEY WOULD UNRSTAND FOR THEIR AGE SCE RELATNSHIP AND SEXUAL LOVE WASN'T SOMETHG THEY UNRSTOOD YET. EVENTUALLY, THOUGH, THAT STARTED TO PASS.AFTER FOUR YEARS, MY OLST SON'S IENDS KNEW HE HAD A GAY DAD, AND, TO PUT TEENAGE TERMS, WASN'T SO BAD. HE IS STILL EMBARRASSED BY THE WHOLE THG ON SOME LEVEL. HE LOV ME, BUT HE DON'T SUPPORT MY LIFTYLE. I THK HE UNRSTANDS BEG GAY ISN'T A CHOICE ANYMORE, AND I BELIEVE THAT WILL NTUE.MY EX-WIFE CERTALY BORE THE BNT OF THE DAY-TO-DAY WH THE KIDS. SHE STILL DO, AND I KNOW 'S STILL NOT EASY. I DO MY BT TO TRY TO REMA ENGAGED OM A DISTANCE, OFFERG AS MUCH HELP WH THGS LIKE DOCTOR APPOTMENTS, HAIRCUTS, BUYG SHO AND CLOTH, RERCG THEM CLEANG THEIR ROOM AS MUCH AS I ULD.MY WEEKEND VISS WH THE KIDS ULD BE SCRIBED, STILL, AS DRIVG 100 AROUND THE SUBURBS NNG ERRANDS WH THE BOYS, HAVG FUN AND TRYG TO MAKE MEMORABLE EXPERIENC WH THEM.STT WH HIS SISTER AND CHILDRENCOURTY STT TAKACSI HAVE WORKED VERY HARD TO STAY NNECTED TO THE BOYS, AND 'S NOT EASY. CALLG EVERY DAY BEFORE SCHOOL TO WISH THEM OFF, LLG TWO TO THREE TIM AFTER SCHOOL, AND FACETIMG THEM OFTEN. I STILL DRIVE BACK AND FORTH TO MICHIGAN MULTIPLE TIM A MONTH, RACKG UP 1,500 TO 2,000 A MONTH.DON'T HI THE TTHWHAT I'VE LEARNED IS THAT THIS PROCS TAK TIME. I HAD MORE THAN 25 YEARS TO E TO TERMS WH MY INTY, AND THK I EXPECTED THOSE CLOST TO ME WOULD ADJT QUICKLY. THAT'S SIMPLY NOT REALISTIC.FOR THOSE GOG THROUGH THE SAME PROCS: GIVE YOUR WIFE (EX) THE SPACE AND TIME SHE NEEDS TO PROCS THE CHANG, LOVE YOUR KIDS WH ALL YOUR HEART AND BE HONT WH THEM ABOUT THE CHANG.DON'T HI THE TTH ONCE 'S OUT. ONE OF MY BIGGT REGRETS IS NOT TELLG EVERYONE MY FAY AT THE SAME TIME, LYG ABOUT THE REASON WE DIVORCED. I WISH I HAD NOT AGREED TO THAT, BUT ALSO UNRSTAND AT THE TIME SEEMED LIKE MA SENSE.I DON'T REGRET THE PATH I WENT DOWN. I STILL BELIEVE WAS GOD'S PLAN THE WAY THGS HAVE GONE; HAD THEY NOT, I WOULDN'T HAVE HAD 20 GOOD YEARS WH MY NOW EX-WIFE, AND I WOULDN'T HAVE THREE AWOME BOYS. I WOULDN'T TRA THAT FOR ANYTHG.MY WISH IS THAT THGS WILL NTUE TO REANIZE AND ONE DAY WE'LL ALL LOOK BACK AT 2014 AND 'LL JT BE ANOTHER FLECTN POTS OUR LIFE.I HELPED START A GROUP FOR GAY FATHERS CHIGO AND HAS SHOWN ME THAT THERE ARE OTHER GAY FATHERS AHEAD OF ME THEIR G-OUT JOURNEY WH POSIVE EXPERIENC TO SHARE. AFTER YEARS OF HARD WORK, THEY HAVE MARRIED MEN, THEIR EX HAVE MARRIED AS WELL, AND THEY ALL ENJOY VATNS, BIRTHDAYS, AND SHARE THE JOY OF THEIR CHILDREN LIKE ONE, BIG, MORN FAY.STT, HIS PARTNER, JOE, AND HIS THREE SONS.COURTY STT TAKACSTHIS STORY WAS ORIGALLY PUBLISHED JUNE 19, 2018.RELATED TOPICSLGBTQUP NEXT LIVG—BRI SHAR MOM'S HILAR WEDDG PHOTO BOOK FAILAUGT 29, 2023LOOK UP! AUGT'S 'BLUE SUPERMOON' WON'T BE SEEN AGA UNTIL 2037AUGT 29, 2023DISNEY AND MAKE-A-WISH REACH 150,000 WISH GRANTED AT ONCE UPON A WISH PARTYAUGT 28, 2023HOW WBOYS, NSTCTN CREWS AND A NOE CLUB KEPT OTHER MI FIR OM BEG 'ANOTHER LAHAA'AUGT 25, 2023UP NEXT LIVG—BRI SHAR MOM'S HILAR WEDDG PHOTO BOOK FAILAUGT 29, 2023LOOK UP! AUGT'S 'BLUE SUPERMOON' WON'T BE SEEN AGA UNTIL 2037AUGT 29, 2023DISNEY AND MAKE-A-WISH REACH 150,000 WISH GRANTED AT ONCE UPON A WISH PARTYAUGT 28, 2023HOW WBOYS, NSTCTN CREWS AND A NOE CLUB KEPT OTHER MI FIR OM BEG 'ANOTHER LAHAA'AUGT 25, 2023

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