'Return the key': the parents who reject their gay children | Society | The Guardian

Contents:

• 'RETURN THE KEY': THE PARENTS WHO REJECT THEIR GAY CHILDREN
• GENR NONNFORMY, CHILDHOOD REJECTN, AND ADULT ATTACHMENT: A STUDY OF GAY MEN
• GENR NONNFORMY, CHILDHOOD REJECTN, AND ADULT ATTACHMENT: A STUDY OF GAY MEN
• REARCH PAPERCHILDHOOD EMOTNAL ABE, REJECTN SENSIVY, AND PRSN SYMPTOMS YOUNG CHE GAY AND BISEXUAL MEN: TTG A MORATED MEDIATN MOL
• WHAT IT’S LIKE WHEN YOU’RE GAY AND DEALG WH REJECTN
• FAY REJECTN OF LBIAN, GAY AND BISEXUAL CHILDREN LKED TO POOR HEALTH IN CHILDHOOD
• EXPLORG THE RELATNSHIP BETWEEN GENR NONNFORMY AND MENTAL HEALTH AMONG BLACK SOUTH AIN GAY AND BISEXUAL MEN

'RETURN THE KEY': THE PARENTS WHO REJECT THEIR GAY CHILDREN

’”Chris, sadly, isn’t alone his story of parental fa of equalyAt the time I terviewed him, a Brazilian mother who killed her teenage son for beg gay is sentenced to 25 years prison. Celebry stori of heartbreakg parental rejectn are also November, the Amerin thor and producer Robyn Crawford released a book nfirmg she had had a romantic relatnship wh Whney Hoton – but had to abandon out of fear of the repercsns om Hoton’s by Oprah Wey if would have bothered her if her dghter was gay, Cissy Hoton said “Absolutely.

Specifilly, many aspects of the velopment of homosexualy (both the male and female varieti) are not as well unrstood as they should be to make some of the claims that many people felt nfint exprsg. There's a lot to discs regardg the rults of the paper (Skorska et al, 2016): The rearchers were examg the possibily that a maternal immune rponse might play a key role the velopment of a homosexual orientatn mal.

GENR NONNFORMY, CHILDHOOD REJECTN, AND ADULT ATTACHMENT: A STUDY OF GAY MEN

Effectively, then, the mother's immune system would (sometim) treat certa male protes produced by the fet as a foreign pathogen and attempt to attack , rultg out that uld clu a homosexual orientatn, but also fetal loss if the reactn was strong enough (i.

Already there is a lot to like about this hypothis on a theoretil level, as don't pos any hidn adaptive benefs for a homosexual orientatn (as such proposed benefs have not received sound empiril support historilly). The rearchers reced approximately 130 mothers and classified them on the basis of what kd of children they had: those who had at least 1 gay son (n = 54), and those who only had heterosexual sons (n = 72). The mothers were then classified further to one of five groups: those wh gay male only-children (n = 8), those wh gay male offsprg that had no olr brothers (n = 23), those wh gay male offsprg wh olr brothers (n = 23), those wh heterosexual male only-children (n = 11), and those wh heterosexual male offsprg wh siblgs (n = 61).

GENR NONNFORMY, CHILDHOOD REJECTN, AND ADULT ATTACHMENT: A STUDY OF GAY MEN

When nsired terms of the rat of misrriag to live to births, a siar picture emerged: mothers of gay male only-children reported more misrriag to live births (M = 1. As birth weight tends to crease over succsive pregnanci, the parisons were limed to first live-born sons only (n = 63); this left 4 gay male only-children, 7 gay mal wh no olr brothers, 14 heterosexual mal wh gay younger brothers, 10 heterosexual male only-children, and 28 heterosexual mal wh siblgs.

The rults mirrored those of the fetal-loss data: mothers of gay male only-children tend to give birth to fants that weighed signifintly ls (M = 2970 grams), than all other groups (d = 1.

In sum, then, mothers of gay male only-children tend to have a greater number of misrriag and give birth to signifintly lighter offsprg than mothers of other kds.

REARCH PAPERCHILDHOOD EMOTNAL ABE, REJECTN SENSIVY, AND PRSN SYMPTOMS YOUNG CHE GAY AND BISEXUAL MEN: TTG A MORATED MEDIATN MOL

While 's important to not get rried away wh this fdg given the relatively small sample size (I wouldn't put too much stock an N of 8), there is some suggtive evince here worth pursug further that somethg is atypil fetal velopment the se of gay male offsprg. Skorska et al (2016) pos that this might have somethg to do wh some mothers showg a greater immune rponse agast male offsprg, rultg more fetal loss, the rult beg that such mothers are both ls likely to have any children at all and more likely to have gay male children particular. If mothers of gay men do not tend to have a greater rat of female-to-male offsprg, this would st some doubt on the explanatn (and, sce the only data I've heard reports that gay men tend to have more olr brothers, seems they would have noticed the sister pot by now if existed).

On the other hand, if this is a more general immune reactn agast fetal bodi, regardls of their sex, we would not expect such a pattern ( might also predict that mothers takg immunosupprsants would be ls likely to have gay offsprg/misrry, but thgs are unlikely to be that simple owg to the fact that other effects would rult too). As far as I'm aware, homosexual preferenc (not the ocsnal behavr) do not appear to be well documented nonhuman speci; the only exceptn I'm aware of is Rams.

If is tly the se that maternal immune rpons are the drivers of homosexual velopment humans, would be very cur that siar out don't appear to obta across at least other mammalian speci. As a byproduct of that fectn, if acquired durg a particular cril velopmental wdow, the child to velop a homosexual orientatn (or is misrried by the mother).

WHAT IT’S LIKE WHEN YOU’RE GAY AND DEALG WH REJECTN

The purpose of this study was to explore the associatns between the childhood factors and attachment anxiety (the tenncy to experience anxiety regardg potential loss and rejectn close relatnships) and attachment avoidance (the tenncy to avoid vers seek out closens relatnships) gay and bisexual men. Childhood Genr Nonnformy and Relled Perceived Parental and Peer Acceptance Thereof, Internalized Homophobia, and Psychologil Well-Beg Out Heterosexual and Gay Men om Poland. Many studi fd a higher rate of health and mental health problems among lbian, gay and bisexual and transgenr (LGBT) teens than heterosexual youth, often fgerg social rejectn as the culpr.

FAY REJECTN OF LBIAN, GAY AND BISEXUAL CHILDREN LKED TO POOR HEALTH IN CHILDHOOD

The parental anti-LGBTQ bias are at least part rponsible for higher rat of poverty and homelsns as well as worse mental and physil health out among LGBTQ people relative to their cisgenr heterosexual unterparts (Rsell & Fish, 2016; D’ami et al., 2015; Kle & Golub 2016) 1:Key TermsTermsDefnsLGBTQLbian, Gay, Bisexual, Transgenr, Queer/Qutng, Asexual, Intersex, and other sexual and genr morized intiCisgenrA person whose assigned sex at birth aligns wh their current genr inty and exprsnTransgenrA person whose genr inty is other than their sex assigned at birth, and/or someone who tak a trans inty that n clu transwoman, transman, or transgenr personGenr QueerA person who chews the bary sex and genr system; a person whose genr inty and exprsn li outsi of the system of ntemporary normative genr tegori of man and womanGenr Non-nformgA person whose genr exprsn and inty differs om or li outsi of the tradnal genr tegori and inti of man or womanAsexualA person who do not have sexual attractn to or sexual tert other people; a person who intifi as an asexualHeterosexualA person who is primarily attracted to people of a different sex; a person who intifi as a heterosexual or straight personBisexualA person who is attracted to men and women; a person who is attracted to people of any genrPansexualA person who is attracted to people of any genrYet, while parents’ disapproval of an LGBTQ inty is a unique and potentially vastatg form of nflict that n rult trangement, recent rearch suggts that the majory of LGBTQ adults rema their parent-child relatnships even the face of ongog rejectn (Fischer & Kalmijn 2020; Hank & Salzburger, 2015; Norwood 2013; Reczek, 2016a, b; Obock, 2013). The risk of poverty and beg unhoed appears particularly pronounced among LGBTQ youth of lor (Murphy & Hardaway, 2017; Jam et al., 2016), although this is not bee parents of lor are more homo/bi/trans phobic than whe parents but bee of the tersectn of stctural and terpersonal racism that shap parents’ abily and rourc to support their children (Murphy & Hardaway, 2017; Robson, 2018; Toomey et al., 2017; Schmz, Robson, & Sanchez, 2020).

EXPLORG THE RELATNSHIP BETWEEN GENR NONNFORMY AND MENTAL HEALTH AMONG BLACK SOUTH AIN GAY AND BISEXUAL MEN

For example, as Stone (2020) shows, gay and lbian adults do “fort work, ” which volv ncerted efforts to crease parents’ fort levels wh their sexualy by facilatg their entrance to LGBTQ spac. The nstctn of the sexualy variable reprented Table 2 followed a siar procs, wh a wi variety of optns prented, and then a mutually exclive tegoril variable was nstcted wh the tegori: gay or lbian, queer, bisexual, multiple tegori selected, and other (such as pansexual, fluid, straight, etc. Bee of the rejectn of a re part of rponnt’s inty, tnal attempts to nflict n be operative and relatively lm or n be direct or more ntent and that pends on how both members of the parent-child tie engage that nflict and are willg (or not willg) to learn and (25 years, whe, gay cisgenr man) and his mom were tranged for about two years bee she uld not accept him beg gay.

After Percy found a signifint other, brgg his partner around is a way to te parents about how “normal” is to be gay; this tn facilated renciliatn between the pair and supports the ntuatn of their relatnship today:. Didn’t unrstand, and my first reactn after hearg that, oh my God, my son is gog to be ma fun of, my son’s gog to have, you know, all of the terrible thgs that the world has agast gays and lbians, was jt total fear at first. When Clarence’s mom, Gayle (72, whe, cisgenr straight woman), was asked about her feelgs about Clarence beg gay she said, “I jt want him to be happy, and live his life like he feels he should, and be accepted for who he was meant to be” and nsirs their relatnship still “very, very close.

” She explas that her hband has “s and brothers [that have been gay] and so ’s always been somethg that has been always, I’ll say, the closet…they didn’t addrs his fay. For example, Darr (30 years, whe, cisgenr gay man) was rejected om his home by his parents, and afterward did not talk to them for a few years, sayg “When I me out at 15, we didn’t talk aga until I was almost 18. LGBTQ adults do signifint work to keep their relatnship functng when a parent rejects them by managg nflict very specific se study of LGBTQ adult children mak nflict work dynamics more apparent as parents’ anti-LGBTQ beliefs and bias are often so damagg that LGBTQ adults have work diligently to navigate parents’ homophobia or transphobia jt to exist their relatnships (Anrsen & Blosnich, 2013; D’Ami et al., 2015; Montano et al., 2018).