I Know a Lot of Gay Asian Men who Are Actually Tops: Managg and Negotiatg Gay Racial Stigma | SprgerLk

Contents:

• GAY MAN SHOCKED OVER THE RACISM ASIAN MEN THE LGBT COMMUNY DEAL WH ON GRDR
• I KNOW A LOT OF GAY ASIAN MEN WHO ARE ACTUALLY TOPS: MANAGG AND NEGOTIATG GAY RACIAL STIGMA
• GAY ASIAN DATG SE
• WHE GAY MEN REJECT ME BEE I’M ASIAN
• SAVAGE LOVE: WHY ARE WHE GAY GUYS SO RACIST TOWARD ASIAN MEN?
• THE URGENT QUTN GAY ASIAN-AMERIN MEN ARE ASKG THEMSELV
• VERY FEW PEOPLE SAY “NO WH”: GAY MEN OF COLOR AND THE RACIAL POLICS OF DIRE

GAY MAN SHOCKED OVER THE RACISM ASIAN MEN THE LGBT COMMUNY DEAL WH ON GRDR

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I KNOW A LOT OF GAY ASIAN MEN WHO ARE ACTUALLY TOPS: MANAGG AND NEGOTIATG GAY RACIAL STIGMA

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GAY ASIAN DATG SE

But while preferenc are allowed (and gay men of lor have them, too), there’s no exce for lterg Grdr or Tr or Ren—or your nversatns bars—wh humanizg garbage like “no Asians, ” “no Blacks, ” “no femm, ” “no fatti, ” etc. And while racism is a problem the gay muny (sometim thoughtls, sometim malic, always unacceptable), acrdg to 2010 US Cens data, as cnched by the Williams Instute at UCLA, same-sex upl are far likelier to be terracial (20. Now, I would never suggt that bi guys n’t honor monogamo mments—even though I routely say jt that about straight guys, gay guys, straight women, and lbians—but would be foolish for you to make a monogamo mment.

And while preferenc are allowed (and gay men of lor have them, too), there’s no exce for lterg Grdr or Tr or Ren—or your nversatns bars—wh humanizg garbage like “no Asians, ” “no Blacks, ” “no femm, ” “no fatti, ” etc. Wh this urgency to fe their own experienc and the begng of the mise of -swchg, gay Asian-Amerin men are askg qutns spe such mixed signals—or perhaps bee of them: What do beg more Amerin really mean? ”A Pri celebratn on June 27, 2021 New York Tompks//Getty ImagRoss’s experience speaks to a realy mon among more than a dozen gay Asian Amerins Esquire terviewed, all of whom flagged that though they have found joy and succs, blossomed om toxic soil.

WHE GAY MEN REJECT ME BEE I’M ASIAN

” A mory upon a mory, gay Asian-Amerin men scribe a lot of overlap their inti: Both sis of that tersectnal inty are affected by enclave livg ( eher ethnic neighborhoods or gayborhoods), prumptn of crazy rich liftyl spe extreme wealth dispary for both Asian and gay Amerins, and a sheen of emasculatn that was famoly ritured a racist natnal magaze spread om 2004 that asked of s rears, “Gay or Asian? Highlights—like poet and novelist Ocean Vuong’s poignantly msy sex scen On Earth We’re Briefly Geo, or the tenr shower scene last year’s Taiwane gay romance Your Name Engraved Here—are few and fleetg. ” He add that he intifi more as a daddy the days than as Asian seems some gay Asian-Amerin men across generatns are leang to a sense of belongg by birthright and all the brash nfince giv them, at a time when what means to be Amerin and what means to be gay are pg the grip of whe hegemony.

Specifilly for gay men, a slim hairls body may provi men who posss those tras wh sexual currency at a “Twk bar, ” but those same tras would have ls currency at a “Leather bar, ” where burlier bodi are nsired more sirable.

While a number of different typ of sexual fields that n be found the gay muny have been discsed the amic lerature as well as the popular prs, there has been ls attentn paid to the ways that erotic words are socially anized (Mart and Gee 2006).

SAVAGE LOVE: WHY ARE WHE GAY GUYS SO RACIST TOWARD ASIAN MEN?

To do so, we brgg together the sexual fields perspective wh the growg lerature on sexual racism, an act of eher sexually excludg non-wh as potential partners or cludg racial mori as sexual partners based only on racial several scholars have noted, ntemporary gay life is marked by high levels of racism directed towards gay men of lor by gay whe men, wh much of the racism maniftg self as negative sexual attus towards, and sexual excln or fetishizatn of, non-whe men (Armstrong 2002; Bébé 2001; Epste 1996; McBri 2005; Tenunis, 2007). After examg onle personal ads and terviewg gay men, Robson (2015) found that gay whe men often exclu gay men of lor as potential sexual partners while nyg that their racial preferenc are racist nature. In fact, several studi have shown that gay whe men were much more likely to prefer their own race and actively exclu non-wh as potential sexual than gay men of lor (Lundquist and L 2015; Ph and Kfman 2003; Rafalow, Feliciano, and Robt 2017; Smh 2014).

THE URGENT QUTN GAY ASIAN-AMERIN MEN ARE ASKG THEMSELV

Dpe gay whe men’s sistence that sexual excln was not racism but rather personal preference, and that the personal preferenc have nothg to do wh racism, Collanr and his lleagu (2015) found that attus toward sexual excln were related to almost every intified factor associated wh racist attus general. Th, sexual racism should be unrstood not as personal preference, but as “problematic ndns that stcture the very formatn of romantic relatnships” that is neher benign nor trivial (Bedi 2015: 998) the ia of sexual racism has been wily discsed the popular prs, and amic studi have also documented the racial hierarchy of sire the gay muny, there have been fewer attempts to systematilly exame how such racialized hierarchi of sire are unrstood by gay men of lor and, more importantly, the impact the racial hierarchi have on them.

Wh any sexual field, some dividual e to be seen as more sirable than other dividuals pendg on the tras that they posss that are valued by the specific sexual field which they discsg gay sexual fields, Green (2008; 2011) intifi a number of potential tras that fluence the level of sirabily that any given dividual might posss. As evinced by Green’s own acunts of his field work, and the statements ma by participants his study, race plays a pivotal role fg attractivens and sirabily across var sexual fields wh the gay muny. Whether the specific field qutn is a gay leather bar or a gay sports bar where different typ of drs, different amounts of body hair, etc., may be emed more sirable, race remas a nsistent, and nstant, marker of sirabily.

In fact, sire for whens has been noted by a number of scholars examg race and racism the gay muny (Callanr, Holt and Newman 2016; Han 2007; Robson 2015; McBri 2005; Tnis 2007) other characteristics intified by Green, such as clothg or mculary, whens is a central anizg prciple the gay muny (Bébé 2001; Han 2007).

VERY FEW PEOPLE SAY “NO WH”: GAY MEN OF COLOR AND THE RACIAL POLICS OF DIRE

In promotg equaly through the normalizatn of (homo)sexualy at the expense of “non-gay” issu, gay anizatns such as The Human Rights Campaign promote a monolhic image of the “gay muny, ” as beg rich, nservative, and whe (Bébé 2001; Phelan 2001; Seidman 2002; Walters 2014). We would argue that the value of whens transcends diverse sexual fields wh the gay muny that acts as a universal currency that superses all other characteristics emed worthy wh any given sexual field.

As Peter Jackson (2000: 184) not:When sirabily is lked wh race, and when certa rac are ascribed greater erotic tert than others, then to be a member of an “unsexy” ethnic group is to be equated wh an ferr form of importantly, unlike other markers of sirabily among gay men that Green discs, such as amount of body hair, mculary, cloth, etc., race is an entirely ascribed stat, not an achieved one. For example, Han (2015: 141) quot one gay Asian man, who attempted to make himself more sirable the gay muny by changg his body through exercise, as statg:I had mcl where I didn’t thk you had mcl. I ed to have a 10-foot area around me and people would avoid me, I uldn’t believe while mculary may be the sired tra a “mcle bar, ” the lived realy for gay men of lor is that their attempts to velop or acquire the currency of sire wh those specific gay spac, or sexual fields, is negated by their race.

More importantly, when gay men of lor are sexually preferred by gay whe men, they are preferred not as dividuals but bee they fulfill racial stereotyp regardg sexual behavrs (Wilson, valera, Ventuneac, Balan, Rowe and Carballo-Dieguez 2009). While still utilized by a number of ntemporary scholars to exame racialized sexual stereotyp of black men and women (Buggs 2017; Stevenson 1994; Yancey 2002), the ncept of sexual racism has been particularly eful examg sexual excln of gay men of lor as potential sexual partners, as well as for examg the sexual objectifitn of gay men of lor, by gay whe men.

Some mentators and gay media outlets have argued that sexual sir for one race, and/or sexual excln of another race, is not racism but personal preference, while others have argued that excludg an entire race of people as potential sexual partners is, ed, a racist act. For example, several mentators have observed that gay whe men, and to a lser gree gay men of lor, practice sexual racism on gay datg apps such as Grdr and on onle datg s (Callanr, Holt and Newman 2015; McDa 2005; Pl, Ayala and Choi 2010; Robson 2015; Smh 2017).

Th rather than a way of simply listg their preference for whe men, onle s for seekg sexual partners have lved to venu for gay whe men to volize their racist sexual racism is more than simply excludg members of a racial group as potential sexual partners or objectifyg them as sexual others even when they are sired. While this n volve physil segregatn of gay men of lor and gay whe men to different social lotns, stctural sexual racism also clus margally tegrated “mixed bars, ” where gay men of lor and gay whe men occupy different areas of the tablishment.

While some are overt such as statements such as “no fats, no femm, no Asians, ” on onle datg apps, teractnal sexual racism also clus more subtle actns such as bars changg mic or enforcg drs s to lim the number of men of lor or gay whe men “warng” other whe men to avoid certa clubs based on the race of the clientele. ” It isn’t simply that whe men are nsired more sirable the gay muny, but that there is a pattern of preference for whe men, even among gay men of lor, that his the larger stctur of power that plac a premium value on whens. For example, a recent study by Rafalow, Feliciano, and Robt (2017), the thors fd that gay men of lor, as well as lbians of lor, are much more likely to exclu members of their own race as potential sexual partners than gay whe men or whe lbians.