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Jacksonville Jaguars ach Kev Maxen, who joed the team last year, me out publicly as gay an terview wh Outsports published on Thursday, beg the first ach a U.S. men’s profsnal league to do so" emprop="scriptn

Contents:

‘I AM GAY – BUT I WASN’T BORN THIS WAY’

Inial teractns between lbian, gay, bisexual, or transgenr (LGBT) clients and psychotherapists n reveal existg bias om both parti. LGBT * interview with a gay person *

You so obvly nnot be gay, was her implitn, bee this is good was 2006, a full five years before Lady Gaga would set the Born This Way argument atop s unassailable cultural perch, but even then the popular unrstandg of orientatn was that was somethg you were born wh, somethg you uldn’t change. But what feels most accurate to say is that I’m gay – but I wasn’t born this people may fd their sir changg directn - and n't jt be explaed as experimentatn (Cred: Ignac Lehmann)In 1977, jt over 10% of Amerins thought gayns was somethg you were born wh, acrdg to Gallup.

THE HIDN GAY LIV FALLY BEG UNVERED

* interview with a gay person *

Throughout the same perd, the number of Amerins who believe homosexualy is “due to someone’s upbrgg/environment” fell om jt unr 60% to ias reached cril mass pop culture, first wh Lady Gaga’s 2011 Born This Way and one year later wh Macklemore’s Same Love, the chos of which has a gay person sgg “I n’t change even if I tried, even if I wanted to. ” Around the same time, the Human Rights Campaign clared unequivolly that “Beg gay is not a choice, ” and to claim that is “giv unwarranted crence to roundly disproven practic such as nversn or reparative therapy. ”People who challenge the Born This Way narrative are often st as homophobic, and their thkg is nsired backwardAs Jane Ward not Not Gay: Sex Between Straight Whe Men, what’s tertg about many of the claims is how transparent their speakers are wh their polil motivatns.

“Such statements, ” she wr, “fe blogil acunts wh an obligatory and nearly ercive force, suggtg that anyone who scrib homosexual sire as a choice or social nstctn is playg to the hands of the enemy. ” People who challenge the Born This Way narrative are often st as homophobic, and their thkg is nsired backward – even if they are themselv, for example, Cynthia Nixon of Sex and The Cy fame.

EIGHT QUEER PODSTS TO LISTEN TO DURG PRI MONTH AND BEYONDFROM THE RADIL ROOTS OF PRI TO STORI OF TRANS PEOPLE THE WILD WT, THE SHOWS N EXPAND LISTENERS’ KNOWLEDGE OF QUEER HISTORY THE UNED STAT.BY JTE GOOJUNE 24, 2020ILLTRATN BY ALICIA TATONE.SAVE THIS STORYSAVESAVE THIS STORYSAVEPRI LOOKS DIFFERENT THIS YEAR. WH BLACK LIV MATTER PROTTS PROLIFERATG ACROSS THE NATN THE MONTH OF JUNE, THE UAL CELEBRATORY ATMOSPHERE OF PRI MONTH—WHICH RECENT YEARS, HAS FEATURED CREASGLY RPORATE EVENTS—HAS SHIFTED TO SHOW SOLIDARY WH THE CURRENT CIVIL RIGHTS MOVEMENT AGAST SYSTEMIC RACISM.BUT PRI AND AND BLACK LIV MATTER ARE FAR OM MUTUALLY EXCLIVE; FACT, GAY LIBERATN AND BLACK LIBERATN ARE HISTORILLY TERWED, WH BLACK TRANS ACTIVISTS RTG AT THE CENTER OF BOTH MOVEMENTS. AND AS MANY AMERINS ARE SEEKG TO EPEN THEIR KNOWLEDGE OF BLACK HISTORY, SO TOO SHOULD THEY SEEK TO UNRSTAND THE HISTORY OF QUEER PEOPLE AMERI AND BEYOND, WHICH HAS BEEN SIARLY ELID OM OUR TEXTBOOKS.THE PODSTS ARTFULLY LK THE PAST TO THE PRENT, REVEAL HIDN HISTORI, OFFER A SENSE OF REPRENTATN AND MUNY, AND HONOR THE ORIGS OF PRI SELF—WHICH WAS, AFTER ALL, A RT.NANCYHOSTED BY KATHY TU AND TOB LOW, NANCY HAS BEEN HIGHLY ACCLAIMED SCE S LNCH 2017, NOT LEAST BEE S HOSTS’ INTI AND PERSONAL JOURNEYS HAVE BEEN WOVEN TO THE SHOW’S DNA OM THE JUMP. IN NANCY’S FIRST EPISO, TU AND LOW BOTH TERVIEWED THEIR MOTHERS—WHO GREW UP TAIWAN AND CHA, RPECTIVELY—ABOUT THEIR EXPERIENC G OUT, TO VERY DIFFERENT RULTS. SCE THAT SEMAL EPISO, NANCY HAS PROVID A PLATFORM WHERE VAR LGBTQIA+ EXPERIENC N BE UNPACKED, SHARED, AND CELEBRATED. FEATURG A MIX OF CELEBRY TERVIEWS, QUEER HISTORY, POP-CULTURE ANALYIS, AND ANK NVERSATNS ABOUT THE STGGL QUEER PEOPLE AMERI NTUE TO FACE, ’S AN IMPRSIVELY WELL-ROUND SHOW, AND ONE OF WNYC’S CROWN JEWELS.LISTEN: “BLACK TRANS LIV MATTER,” A NVERSATN WH AWARD-WNG JOURNALIST IMARA JON ABOUT THE IMPORTANCE OF CLUDG BLACK TRANS PEOPLE THE BLACK LIV MATTER MOVEMENT, AND THE RADIL ROOTS OF PRI.SUPPORT NANCYGENR REVEALRELEASED EVERY MONDAY, GENR REVEAL AMPLIFI THE STORI OF TRANS AND NONBARY FOLKS. STILL NOT QUE SURE WHAT “NONBARY” MEANS? THAT’S OKAY—GENR REVEAL ALSO PRIS SELF BEG A EE ROURCE FOR THOSE SEEKG TO TE THEMSELV ABOUT GENR. ITS PILOT EPISO, “GENR 101,” EXPLAS TERMOLOGY LIKE “CISGENR,” “TERF,” “GENRQUEER,” AND MORE (LISTENERS N THEN GRADUATE TO “GENR 102,” “GENR 103,” “GENR 201,” “GENR 202,” “GENR 301,” “GENR 401,” “GENR 402,” “GENR 501,” AND “GENR 502”). HOST TUCK WOODSTOCK, WHOSE FECT LGH PUNCTUAT EACH TERVIEW, HAS FEATURED MORE THAN 60 GUTS OVER THE URSE OF FIVE SEASONS, MAKG THIS THE PERFECT PLACE TO GET ACQUATED WH QUEER AND NONBARY PEOPLE WHO ARE TRANSFORMG THEIR MUNI AND THE WORLD.LISTEN: “DOMIQUE, RIAH, LAYLEEN, AND ALYSSA PARIAH,” A NVERSATN WH ACTIVIST ALYSSA PARIAH ABOUT BLM, BLACK TRANS LIBERATN, AND HOW BAIL FUNDS N SAVE BLACK TRANS LIV.SUPPORT GENR REVEALMAKG GAY HISTORYOVER THE URSE OF SEVEN SEASONS, MAKG GAY HISTORY HAS REVEALED THE HIDN HISTORY OF THE LGBTQIA+ CIVIL RIGHTS MOVEMENT THROUGH THE VOIC OF S MOST PROMENT LEARS. FEATURG ARCHIVAL TERVIEWS WH GAY-RIGHTS ACTIVISTS CLUDG SYLVIA RIVERA, MARSHA P. JOHNSON, BARBARA GTGS AND KAY LAHEN, AND BAYARD RT, MAKG GAY HISTORY’S UNPARALLELED ACCS TO PRIMARY SOURC MAKE THIS SHOW A PARTICULARLY POWERFUL LISTEN. HOST ERIC MARC NDUCTED THE TERVIEWS HIMSELF OVER S, AND THE RULT IS A WI-RANGG ORAL HISTORY PROJECT THAT FEELS BOTH TIMATE AND IMMEDIATE.LISTEN: “STONEWALL 50: EPISO 2: EVERYTHG CLICKED… AND THE RT WAS ON,” A FIRST-PERSON ACUNT OF THE 1969 STONEWALL UPRISG AS TOLD BY MARSHA P. JOHNSON AND OTHER QUEER ACTIVISTS WHO WERE AT THE RT.MOST POPULARDONALD TMP’S LAWYER CAN’T STOP GOG ON TV AND MAKG DONALD TMP LOOK RIDICULOLY GUILTY OF THE CRIM HE’S BEEN ACCED OFBY BS LEVRILEY KEOUGH ON GROWG UP PRLEY, LOSG LISA MARIE, AND INHERG GRACELANDBY BRT HENNEMUTH“DOPEY AND CONSTUTNALLY DUB”: LEGAL EXPERTS BLAST JUDGE AILEEN CANNON’S LATT PRO-TMP RULGSBY BS LEVSUPPORT MAKG GAY HISTORYAOQUEER PODSTHOSTED BY SELLY THIAM, A JOURNALIST, ORAL HISTORIAN, AND PRODUCER, AOQUEER CELEBRAT THE LOVE STORI OF QUEER AINS, FEATURG THE EXPERIENC OF PEOPLE OM BOTH THE AIN NTENT AND THE DIASPORA. THE BETIFULLY PRODUCED EPISOS EXPLORE TOPICS CLUDG AIN G-OUT STORI, THE DISAPPEARANCE OF A QUEER SOMALI WOMAN MNEAPOLIS, THE STORY OF A UGANDAN MAN WHO PLANNED TO HOST FIRST GAY PRI EVENT AT A REFUGEE MP, AND THE PLITED DYNAMICS OF G GRDR AI, WHERE SOME UNTRI STILL CRIMALIZE HOMOSEXUALY. THROUGH A MIX OF LIVE STORYTELLG, TERVIEWS, AND VTIGATIVE REPORTG, THE PERSONAL NARRATIV THAT THIAM UNVERS ARE PROFOUNDLY MOVG, AND WILL UNDOUBTEDLY EXPAND LISTENERS’ UNRSTANDG OF THE LIVED EXPERIENC OF QUEER BLACK PEOPLE ACROSS THE GLOBE.LISTEN: “HOW ARE YOU DOG?,” WHICH EXAM HOW THE PANMIC HAS BEEN AFFECTG QUEER AIN MUNI ALL OVER THE WORLD, OM UGANDA TO SWEN TO WT AI TO BOSTON.SUPPORT AOQUEER (NONE ON RERD)QUEER AMERIQUEER AMERI SEEKS TO TE LISTENERS ON THE LGBTQIA+ HISTORY THAT WAS NOT TGHT CLASSROOMS, WH EPISOS THAT ARE SPECIFILLY SIGNED FOR STUNTS AND TEACHERS WHO WANT TO TEGRATE QUEER HISTORY TO THEIR STANDARD CURRICULUM. THIS MEANS THAT EPISOS ALTERNATE BETWEEN THOUGHTFUL HISTORIL ANALYSIS (CLUDG DISCSNS OF THE LAVENR SRE, “ROMANTIC IENDSHIPS” BETWEEN LBIANS THROUGHOUT HISTORY, HOW WW II IMPACTED GAY AND LBIAN MUNI, AND THE AIDS EPIMIC), AND PRACTIL GUIS TO RPORATG QUEER HISTORY TO CLASSROOMS. A SPECIAL SERI OM TEACHG TOLERANCE, A PROJECT OF THE SOUTHERN POVERTY LAW CENTER, EACH EPISO PAGE OF QUEER HISTORY CLUS A THOROUGH ROURCE AND READG LIST TO HELP LISTENERS FURTHER TE THEMSELV. HOSTED BY LEILA RUPP AND JOHN D’E, QUEER AMERI IS AS PELLG AS IS PREHENSIVE.LISTEN: “THE EXPERIENCE OF TRANS PEOPLE,” A NVERSATN WH HISTORIAN AND WRER GENNY BEEMYN ABOUT THE HISTORY OF TRANS AND GENR NONNFORMG FIGUR, OM THE WILD WT TO THE MORN DAY.SUPPORT QUEER HISTORY (SOUTHERN POVERTY LAW CENTER)QUEERWOC: THE PODSTQUEERWOC IS AN ONLE MUNY CREATED SPECIFILLY FOR “PEOPLE WH FEME ENERGI, MARGALIZED GENRS, SEXUALTI, AND RAC” TO MEET AND SOCIALIZE. ITS ACPANYG PODST (“AN SURGENT PODST FOR QUEER WOMEN OF LOR”) IS HOSTED BY FOUNRS NIKEETA, AN ANIZER AND ACTIVIST, AND MONEY, A MENTAL HEALTH UNSELOR AND DOCTORAL NDIDATE, WHOSE NATURAL BANTER F EVEN THE MOST DIFFICULT TOPICS WH A SENSE OF LEVY AND MARARIE. TOGETHER, NIKEETA AND MONEY HOLD SPACE FOR NVERSATNS AROUND FATPHOBIA THE LBIAN MUNY, WHY PEOPLE GET TRIGGERED, COVID-19 AND THE REVOLUTN, AND HOW AUDRE LOR’S WRG N HELP FACILATE HEALG. THEY ALSO FEATURE SEGMENTS CLUDG “MENTAL MOMENT,” WHICH ENURAG TROSPECTN AND OFFERS TOOLS FOR SELF-PRERVATN, AND “LEFTIST LBIAN LUMARY LABOR LECTURE,” WHICH T LISTENERS ON THE LGO OF THE SOCIAL-JTICE MOVEMENT.MOST POPULARDONALD TMP’S LAWYER CAN’T STOP GOG ON TV AND MAKG DONALD TMP LOOK RIDICULOLY GUILTY OF THE CRIM HE’S BEEN ACCED OFBY BS LEVRILEY KEOUGH ON GROWG UP PRLEY, LOSG LISA MARIE, AND INHERG GRACELANDBY BRT HENNEMUTH“DOPEY AND CONSTUTNALLY DUB”: LEGAL EXPERTS BLAST JUDGE AILEEN CANNON’S LATT PRO-TMP RULGSBY BS LEVLISTEN: “YA GAY AUNTI ‘DIGG’ FOR GEMS’ FT. QUEERWOC,” A WI-RANGG NVERSATN WH HANIFAH WALIDAH AND RED SUMMER OF THE PODST YA GAY AUNTI ABOUT RECENT PROTTS, THE “BLACK YEEHAW AGENDA,” BLACK ROLLER-SKATG CULTURE, AND MORE. AND AS NIKEETA NOT AT THE TOP OF THIS EPISO, QUEERWOC DON’T NEED A FEATURE PUBLITNS LIKE THE NEW YORK TIM OR, SAY, VANY FAIR, TO VALIDATE THE WORK THEY’RE DOG—BUT THEY WELE ALL NEWFOUND LISTENERS WILLG TO EMBRACE THEIR MSAGE.SUPPORT QUEERWOC: THE PODSTOUTWARDA MONTHLY “SALON” HOSTED BY RUMAAN ALAM, J. BRYAN LOWR, AND CHRISTA CTECCI, OUTWARD DIV EP TO QUEER CULTURE, CURRENT EVENTS, AND LGBTQIA+ HISTORY. THROUGH TERVIEWS WH ACTIVISTS, JOURNALISTS, AND THORS, THE HOSTS LVE TO THE PLEXI OF TOPICS CLUDG RADIL MOVEMENTS, CHOSEN FAY, TRAVELG AS A GAY PERSON, AND QUEER SEX. LISTENG TO OUTWARD EPISOS OFTEN FEELS LIKE STG AT A DNER PARTY WH A BUNCH OF FASCATG, OPNATED PEOPLE—LISTENERS WILL BE PELLED TO LEAN FORWARD AND SOAK UP EVERY WORD OF THE THOUGHT-PROVOKG, ROUNDTABLE-STYLE NVERSATNS.LISTEN: “COVID-19, AIDS, AND COMMUNY,” WHICH THE HOSTS DRAW PARISONS BETWEEN THE COVID-19 PANMIC AND THE AIDS EPIMIC WH ALPHONSO DAVID, PRINT OF THE HUMAN RIGHTS CAMPAIGN.MORE GREAT STORI FROM VANY FAIR— AUTHOR UZODMA IWEALA ON WHE SIGNS AT BLACK PROTTS— “GEE FLOYD WAS KILLED MY NEIGHBORHOOD”— 15 YEARS AFTER KATRA, A SEND STORM—CORONAVIS—HS NEW ORLEANS— HOW MEGHAN MARKLE DECID TO FALLY SPEAK OUT ABOUT GEE FLOYD— NIKKA OLIVER ON SEATTLE’S EXTRAORDARY PROTTS AND WHAT COM NEXT— WHERE J.K. ROWLG’S TRANSPHOBIA COM FROM— FROM THE ARCHIVE: THE ORIG OF “STRANGE F,” BILLIE HOLIDAY’S BALLAD AGAST RACISMLOOKG FOR MORE? SIGN UP FOR OUR DAILY NEWSLETTER AND NEVER MISS A STORY.JTE GOO

”Gay rights do not have to hge on a geic explanatn for sexualy (Cred: Ignac Lehmann)For Aravosis, and many gay activists like him, the public will only accept and affirm gay people if they thk they were born gay. Patrick Grzanka, Assistant Profsor of Psychology at Universy of Tennsee, for stance, has shown that some people who believe that homosexualy is nate still hold negative views of gays. In fact, the homophobic and non-homophobic rponnts he studied shared siar levels of belief a Born This Way Samantha Allen not at The Daily Beast, the growg public support for gays and lbians has grown out of proportn wh the rise the number of people who believe homosexualy is fixed at birth; would be unlikely that this small change opn uld expla the spike support for gay marriage, for stance.

“It don’t seem to matter as much whether or not people believe that gay people are born that way as do that they simply know someone who is currently gay, ” Allen spe of the studi, those who ph agast Born This Way narrativ have been heavily cricised by gay activists.

INTAKE INTERVIEWG WH LBIAN, GAY, BISEXUAL, AND TRANSGENR CLIENTS: STARTG OM A PLACE OF AFFIRMATN

Siarly, Ward has received her own hatemail for phg agast the lg LGB narrativ, wh some gays tellg her she’s “worse than Ann Coulter, ” the ntroversial US thor of books like If Democrats Had Any Bras, They’d Be Republins.

And when I published my say on choosg to be gay, an irate Amerin lbian activist wrote me that had “jt been nfirmed” to her that my wrg was “directly rponsible for four gay aths Rsia. There is a unanimo opn that gay “nversn therapy” should be rejectedLet’s first be clear that whatever the origs of our sexual orientatn, there is a unanimo opn that gay “nversn therapy” should be rejected. The efforts are potentially harmful, acrdg to the APA, “bee they prent the view that the sexual orientatn of lbian, gay and bisexual youth is a mental illns of disorr, and they often ame the abily to change one’s sexual orientatn as a personal and moral failure.

The APA, for example, while notg that most people experience ltle to no choice over their orientatns, says this of homosexualy’s origs:“Although much rearch has examed the possible geic, hormonal, velopmental, social and cultural fluenc on sexual orientatn, no fdgs have emerged that perm scientists to nclu that sexual orientatn is termed by any particular factor or factors. ”Siarly, the Amerin Psychiatric Associatn wr a 2013 statement that while the of heterosexualy and homosexualy are currently unknown, they are likely “multifactorial cludg blogil and behavral roots which may vary between different dividuals and may even vary over time. ” Acrdg to LeVay’s rearch, a specific part of the bra, the third terstial nucls of the anterr hypothalam (INAH-3), is smaller homosexual men than is heterosexual as they might, scientists have stggled to inty any particular gen that nsistently predict the directns of our love and sire (Cred: Ignac Lehmann)Read moreYou n spot the problem wh this study a e away: were the gay bras LeVay studied born that way, or did they bee that way?

JACKSONVILLE JAGUARS' KEV MAXEN BE FIRST MALE COACH TO COME OUT AS GAY MAJOR U.S. SPORTS

Begng om his observatn that there are more gay relativ on a mother’s si than a father’s, Hamer turned his attentn to the X chromosome (which is passed on by the mother). Bis the dividual criqu leveled agast each new study announcg some gay gene disvery, there are major methodologil cricisms to make about the entire enterprise general, as Grzanka pots out: “If we look at the raveno pursu, particularly among Amerin scientists, to fd a gay gene, what we see is that the ncln has already been arrived at.

”The other problem wh Born This Way science is summed up nicely by Simon Copland: “Scientists are askg whether homosexualy is natural when we n’t even agree exactly what homosexualy is. ” Our sir may exprs themselv many different ways that do not all nform to existg notns of ‘gay’, ‘straight’ or ‘bisexual’ is one of the bt takeaways of Ward’s Not Gay, a peratg analysis of sex between straight whe men. ”Gay or not, our sir are oriented and re-oriented throughout our liv (Cred: Ignac Lehmann)In fact, the straight-intified men Ward studied for her book sometim found themselv suatns that sparked the sire for homosexual sex: aterni, ployments, public rtrooms, etc.

*BEAR-MAGAZINE.COM* INTERVIEW WITH A GAY PERSON

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nsumer-marketg-un__slot--paywall-bar-ll-to-actn"></div><div class="journey-un"></div></div></asi></div><div class="SpaceHolr-oayp fXtswJ ad-height-hold"></div><div class="StickyHeroAdWrapper-eNLJUc gStsdY ad-stickyhero ad-stickyhero--standard ad-stickyhero-enable-mobile should-hold-space"><div class="AdWrapper-dQtivb fZrssQ ad ad--hero"><div class="ad__slot ad__slot--hero" data-no-id="0ua4zg"></div></div><div class="ConsumerMarketgUnThemedWrapper-iUTMTf jssHut nsumer-marketg-un nsumer-marketg-un--display-hero" role="prentatn" aria-hidn="te"><div class="nsumer-marketg-un__slot nsumer-marketg-un__slot--display-hero"></div><div class="journey-un"></div></div></div><div class="SpaceHolr-oayp fXtswJ ad-height-hold"></div><ma id="ma-ntent" tabx="-1" class="BasePageMaContent-kFvAuh ewPCZH page__ma-ntent"><article class="article ma-ntent" lang="en-US"><div class="ArticlePageLeBackground-EufvU tFsh"><hear class="ContentHearWrapper-clujbs hksevn ntent-hear article__ntent-hear"><div data-ttid="ContentHearContaer" class="ContentHearContaer-cGKRbE knDxNq"><div class="ContentHearHedAccredatnWrapper-GFiQf cDNVlV"><div data-ttid="ContentHearTleBlockWrapper" class="ContentHearTleBlockWrapper-cjmSKp eiGjZk"><div data-ttid="ContentHearRubric" class="ContentHearRubricBlock-LmpbT tPofh"><div data-ttid="ContentHearRubricDateBlock" class="ContentHearRubricDateBlock-kAQcZP fTFWxD"><div class="RubricWrapper-dKmCNX gPBNpL bric ContentHearRubricContaer-eTudtt iRsSlw"><a class="RubricLk-gRWSOU cwyjHY bric__lk" href="/muny"><span class="RubricName-fVtemz cLxcNi">Communy</span></a></div></div></div><h1 data-ttid="ContentHearHed" class="BaseWrap-sc-gjQpdd BaseText-ewhhUZ ContentHearHed-NCyCC iUEiRd jdcWfa isouMH">Reimagg the Closet</h1></div><div class="ContentHearAccredatn-lfctVB etVsnJ ntent-hear__accredatn" data-ttid="ContentHearAccredatn"><div class="ContentHearDek-bIqFFZ eijTxK">Beg out, loud, and proud don’t mean the same thg to everyone, pecially for LGBTQ+ people of tersectnal inti. We asked five to expla how the closet works (and often don’t) for them.</div><div class="ContentHearByle-kmPyCa emiglw"><div class="ContentHearByleContent-dpPmNn DRFq"><div data-ttid="BylWrapper" class="BylWrapper-KIudk irTIfE byl ContentHearByl-cZqgyJ bHLeKI"><p class="ByleWrapper-jWHrLH hdWCIC byle byl__byle" data-ttid="ByleWrapper" emProp="thor" emType="><span emProp="name" class="ByleNamWrapper-jbHncj fuDQVo"><span data-ttid="ByleName" class="ByleName-kwmrLn cYaBaU byle__name"><span class="BaseWrap-sc-gjQpdd BaseText-ewhhUZ BylePreamble-iJolpQ iUEiRd bCbgyH gnILss byle__preamble">By </span><a class="BaseWrap-sc-gjQpdd BaseText-ewhhUZ BaseLk-eNWuiM ByleLk-gEnFiw iUEiRd hSmufO skIR eErqIx byle__name-lk button" href="/ntributor/nancy-udd">Nancy Udd</a></span></span></p></div><time data-ttid="ContentHearPublishDate" dateTime="2020-11-23T17:43:35-05:00" class="BaseWrap-sc-gjQpdd BaseText-ewhhUZ ContentHearPublishDate-eIBicG iUEiRd dCoEhu bDGyxQ">November 23, 2020</time></div></div><div 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ContentHearLeadAssetCaptn-hPWmSN hfnsqH"><span class="BaseWrap-sc-gjQpdd BaseText-ewhhUZ CaptnCred-ejegDm iUEiRd eNhSMp fNaHcW ptn__cred">Creds, clockwise om top left: Fabliha Anbar, <a href=" target="_blank">Jucci Frh</a>, <a href=" target="_blank">Moréna Espirual</a>, <a href=" target="_blank">Nova Aftab</a> by <a href=" target="_blank">Malik</a>, <a href=" target="_blank">Omar Zayed</a> by <a href=" target="_blank">Ma Nowzari</a></span></div></div></figure></div></div><asi class="PersistentAsiWrapper-VGrR oEIBz persistent-asi persistent-asi--align-left" style="posn:absolute;top:to;height:to" data-ttid="PersistentAsiWrapper"><div class="StickyBoxWrapper-jfYB jNgrSF sticky-box ContentHearPersistentAsi-fsnAmQ dFzKzm"><div class="StickyBoxPrimary-dzWDWL cdhYoN sticky-box__primary"><div class="SocialInsWrapper-hKMEXV ffgPVr social-ins social-ins--has-background ContentHearSocialIns-jzJiyg fLarGt social-ins--share"><ul data-ttid="socialInslist" class="SocialInsList-cHVTIA ivmblD 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10.2695 16.0836 10.9289C15.7858 11.5884 15.7142 12.3277 15.88 13.032C14.5746 12.9664 13.2976 12.6269 12.132 12.0356C10.9663 11.4444 9.93808 10.6145 9.114 9.60003C8.69297 10.3223 8.56366 11.1782 8.7525 11.9926C8.94134 12.8071 9.43407 13.5187 10.13 13.982C9.60866 13.9664 9.0987 13.8258 8.643 13.572V13.614C8.64319 14.3718 8.90547 15.1063 9.38536 15.6928C9.86525 16.2793 10.5332 16.6818 11.276 16.832C10.7924 16.9633 10.2852 16.9825 9.793 16.888C10.0027 17.5404 10.411 18.1109 10.961 18.5197C11.5109 18.9286 12.1749 19.1552 12.86 19.168C11.6971 20.0805 10.2611 20.5754 8.783 20.573C8.518 20.573 8.257 20.558 8 20.528C9.5011 21.4921 11.248 22.0038 13.032 22.002" fill="black"></path></svg></div></a></li><li class="SocialInsListItem-mbhR gQILrJ social-ins__list-em social-ins__list-em--email social-ins__list-em--has-background"><a aria-label="Share via Email" class="external-lk SocialInExternalLk-huuzOU etOOvH social-ins__lk social-ins__lk--email" data-event-click="{"element":"ExternalLk","outgogURL":"mailto:?subject=5%20Queer%20People%20on%20Why%20Comg%20Out%20and%20%E2%80%9CThe%20Closet%E2%80%9D%20Are%20More%20Complited%20Than%20You%20Thk&" href="mailto:?subject=5%20Queer%20People%20on%20Why%20Comg%20Out%20and%20%E2%80%9CThe%20Closet%E2%80%9D%20Are%20More%20Complited%20Than%20You%20Thk& rel="nofollow noopener" target="_blank"><div class="SocialInContaer-huXzUC pMzVC social-ins__in-ntaer"><svg class="SocialInNetworkInComponent-cZaKGz dlOAhZ in in-email" focable="false" viewBox="0 0 32 32" width="32" height="32" xmlns="><tle>Email</tle><path d="M6 23h20V9H6v14zm3.631-12H22.37l-6.368 5.661L9.631 11zM24 12.227V21H8v-8.773l8.002 7.109L24 12.227z" fill-le="evenodd"></path></svg></div></a></li></ul></div></div><div class="StickyBoxPlaceholr-grPmrg dxAvXx"></div></div></asi></hear></div><div data-attribute-verso-pattern="article-body" class="ArticlePageContentBackGround-cNiFNN kJkLmH article-body__ntent"><div class="ArticlePageChunksContent-etcMtP bwyLBj"><div data-ttid="ArticlePageChunks" class="ArticlePageChunks-fLyCVG eOdfIs"><div class="GridWrapper-cAzTTK kHBDeH grid grid-margs grid-ems-2 ArticlePageChunksGrid-hfxa bjczjj grid-layout--adrail narrow wi-adrail"><div class="GridItem-buujkM stRKV grid--em grid-layout__ntent"><div class="BodyWrapper-kufPGa bectqB body body__ntaer article__body" data-journey-hook="client-ntent" data-ttid="BodyWrapper"><div class="body__ner-ntaer"><p> </p><p>Sce the dawn of the LGBTQ+ liberatn movement the Uned Stat, the closet — and g out of — have been central to the mastream queer polil agenda. Comg out, the thkg go, will help more people realize that their sisters, mothers, clost iends, and workers are not, fact, straight — and if you're close wh someone who is queer, how uld you discrimate agast them? That's part of the this behd gay liberatn slogans like "We're Here, We're Queer, Get Used to It" and "Gay is Good," and many of the mastream LGBTQ+ rights movement's greatt polil gas, cludg same-sex marriage or the cultural acceptance driven by Pri celebratns natnwi, have been propelled by the ia that all queer people want to be out, loud, and proud.</p><div><div class="ConsumerMarketgUnThemedWrapper-iUTMTf jssHut nsumer-marketg-un nsumer-marketg-un--article-mid-ntent" role="prentatn" aria-hidn="te"><div class="nsumer-marketg-un__slot nsumer-marketg-un__slot--article-mid-ntent nsumer-marketg-un__slot---ntent"></div><div class="journey-un"></div></div></div><p>Yet the past has shown that many people n (and do) discrimate agast queer people, even when queer people are among their clost panns. And as our society ntu to move beyond a European and whe-centered notn of what beg queer means and how functns, 's bee creasgly evint that many for queer people wh multilayered inti, the closet is not a bary, and "beg out" do not secure one’s safety, self-prervatn, or self-termism.</p><div class="AdWrapper-dQtivb fZrssQ ad ad---ntent"><div class="ad__slot ad__slot---ntent" data-no-id="s9hlc"></div></div><p>Visibily, fact, n be que dangero: 2020 has already seen <a href=">26</a> murrs of transgenr or genr-nonnformg people, acrdg to the Human Rights Campaign. For wrer <a data-offer-url=" class="external-lk" data-event-click="{"element":"ExternalLk","outgogURL":"" href=" rel="nofollow noopener" target="_blank">Jg Jg Wang</a>, beg Che-Amerin and queer means facg the stigma and exhstn of havg to expla one’s inty to his tradnal Che muny who associate queerns wh shame. Nazim Mahmood, a gay Mlim man, jumped to his ath om a balny 2015 after <a href=">g out</a> to his homophobic parents. Countls stori like the prove that the closet isn’t a monolh, and n sometim be perilo to navigate.</p><div class="Contaer-bkChBi byNLHx"></div><p>Reamg the narrative about the closet allows people to plite their experienc on their own terms and strategilly ve others to their spac of fort. Below, we asked five dividuals to reimage their “closets” light of the nuanc of their inty.</p><asi aria-hidn="te" class="PullQuoteEmbedWrapper-sc-EoVjf fQbAzo"><div class="PullQuoteDerativeBorr-sc-iUyOLj fAzNVP"></div><div class="PullQuoteEmbedContent-sc-kTcfhx eoUd"><p>“We don’t wele bari here."</p></div></asi><div role="headg" aria-level="3" class="headg-h3"><strong>Moréna Espirual, Ao-Taíno tor, anizer & performance artist (they/them/elle)</strong></div><p>To pick apart and undo the narrative around g out of the closet, as a Black native person, is to acknowledge my history and the blood nng through my ves. It’s a history that not only honors the fluidy of genr, sexualy, and inty, but mak space for the multiple leag I rry wh me (and extensn, my muny). Before lonizatn, there wouldn’t have been much of a need to e out of “the closet” the first place, sce homophobia, transphobia, and all the other isms (fatphobia, ableism, etc.) have been implemented as ntrol tactics closely tied to racism.</p></div></div></div><div class="GridItem-buujkM fVLMby grid--em grid-layout__asi"><div class="StickyBoxWrapper-jfYB kNleGZ sticky-box"><div class="StickyBoxPrimary-dzWDWL cdhYoN sticky-box__primary"><div class="Contaer-bkChBi byNLHx"></div><div class="AdWrapper-dQtivb fZrssQ ad ad--rail"><div class="ad__slot ad__slot--rail" data-no-id="rx2y3v"></div></div><div class="ConsumerMarketgUnThemedWrapper-iUTMTf jssHut nsumer-marketg-un nsumer-marketg-un--display-rail" role="prentatn" aria-hidn="te"><div class="nsumer-marketg-un__slot nsumer-marketg-un__slot--display-rail"></div><div class="journey-un"></div></div></div><div class="StickyBoxPlaceholr-grPmrg dxAvXx"></div></div></div></div><div class="RowWrapper-UmqTg HEhan full-bleed-ad row-mid-ntent-ad"><div class="StickyMidContentAdWrapper-fSBzwl drzyIa ad-stickymidntent"><div class="AdWrapper-dQtivb fZrssQ ad ad--mid-ntent should-hold-space"><div class="ad__slot ad__slot--mid-ntent" data-no-id="cyrvsp"></div></div></div></div><div class="GridWrapper-cAzTTK kHBDeH grid grid-margs grid-ems-2 ArticlePageChunksGrid-hfxa bjczjj grid-layout--adrail narrow wi-adrail"><div class="GridItem-buujkM stRKV grid--em grid-layout__ntent"><div class="BodyWrapper-kufPGa bectqB body body__ntaer article__body" data-journey-hook="client-ntent" data-ttid="BodyWrapper"><div class="body__ner-ntaer"><p>I am genrqueer, nonbary, genr non-nfirmg, trans, queer, pansexual, asexual, and misexual. How? Bee we don’t wele bari here. Inty is not the end game when all you know how to speak and e are the lonizer’s tools and language. It is simply the vehicle drivg you closer to who you are and what you want to bee. It should volve a certa level of disfort and undog. Like a shaphifter, one day I awake and I feel that I am a man; another day, a woman; another day, both, and so on. I’d probably have to e out every day to acknowledge every part of me.</p><div data-attr-viewport-monor="le-recirc" class="le-recirc-wrapper le-recirc-observer-target-1 viewport-monor-anchor"></div><p>In the streets, -swchg n mean life or ath; beg followed to my doorstep, havg somethg thrown at me, or havg accs to safety. In formal spac, n mean avoidg emotnal and physlogil vlence like gaslightg and my inty beg up for qutn. Culturally, as someone who forms part of the Domin diaspora, and actively aniz and is nversatn wh Black people plac like Colombia and Pe, I mt also reckon wh and honor the nuanc of each culture — how not everyone is at the same place or timele.</p><p>My closet is a dance floor where mbow, funk, reggaeton, trap, bachata, merengue, vogue, rock, R&B, hip hop, and jazz are blastg. Nobody r that this is a wi range of genr and everyone prent allows themselv to move however they feel (or don't feel) lled to. Twerkg is a genrls rual and everyone is a performance artist. This dance floor is versatile and mobile — one day is on the beach, another si a iend’s apartment, and ocsnally a park or club. In every lotn there is flh, there is sweat, and there is air. Together we are trans, queer, digeno, Asian, Black, dark sk, disabled, and fat. We are the sprkl on the ke and the whole ke. We are a damn snack.</p><asi aria-hidn="te" class="PullQuoteEmbedWrapper-sc-EoVjf fQbAzo"><div class="PullQuoteDerativeBorr-sc-iUyOLj fAzNVP"></div><div class="PullQuoteEmbedContent-sc-kTcfhx eoUd"><p>“Comg out is not always an optn."</p></div></asi><div role="headg" aria-level="3" class="headg-h3"><strong>Nova Aftab, Mlim Banglashi-Amerin nonbary actor & mol (they/them)</strong></div><p>Comg out is not always an optn; livg your tth tak a b of bravery and sacrifice. I fd myself “ and out” of the closet. When I’m different environments, I have to adapt “how queer I am” and water down parts of myself pendg on what spac I’m . At the end of the day, I am the same person but wearg different versns of myself to navigate different spac that hab different parts of my inty. It’s like I’m jugglg my queerns, my profsnal inty, my Banglashi si, and my Mlim si. It’s overwhelmg and anxiety as to how I am beg perceived bee I have to thk which me is the most appropriate. When I am lucky I n jt be, which is why <a href=">chosen fay</a> is so important to me. I don’t always like explag myself to others. When you create your own safe space full of people who love you for you, heals you — giv you more urage to grow to yourself more and more each day. At the end of the day, I love who I am.</p></div></div></div><div class="GridItem-buujkM fVLMby grid--em grid-layout__asi"><div class="StickyBoxWrapper-jfYB jxBcTH sticky-box"><div class="StickyBoxPrimary-dzWDWL cdhYoN sticky-box__primary"><div class="AdWrapper-dQtivb fZrssQ ad ad--rail"><div class="ad__slot ad__slot--rail" data-no-id="ptpxc"></div></div><div class="ConsumerMarketgUnThemedWrapper-iUTMTf jssHut nsumer-marketg-un nsumer-marketg-un--display-rail" role="prentatn" aria-hidn="te"><div class="nsumer-marketg-un__slot nsumer-marketg-un__slot--display-rail"></div><div class="journey-un"></div></div><div data-attr-viewport-monor="" class="RecircMostPopularWrapper-bRuGTi jkTTgR recirc-most-popular-wrapper viewport-monor-anchor"><div class="RecircMostPopularConter-jiViNn ktrplG recirc-most-popular-sparrow-trackg hi-asi-ad" data-most-popular-id="mod-most-popular-426"><div class="RecircMostPopularHeadg-iVzhzt jKtkdT">Most Popular</div><ul class="RecircMostPopularItems-dCAajf 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summary-em-trackg__image-lk" href=" aria-hidn="te" tabx="-1" data-ponent-type="recirc-river" data-recirc-id="em-image-4" data-recirc-pattern="summary-em" target="_self"><span class="SpanWrapper-umhxW kGxnNB rponsive-asset SummaryItemRponsiveAsset-hjGIGg egpoQR summary-em__image"><div data-tt="aspect-rat-ntaer" class="AspectRatContaer-bJHpJz hlQxkn"><div class="aspect-rat--overlay-ntaer"><picture class="RponsiveImagePicture-cWuUZO dUOtEa SummaryItemRponsiveAsset-hjGIGg egpoQR summary-em__image rponsive-image"><noscript><source media="(max-width: 767px)" srcSet=" 120w, 240w, 320w, 640w" siz="100vw"/><source media="(m-width: 768px)" srcSet=" 120w, 240w, 320w, 640w" siz="100vw"/><img alt="All the Queer Books Isaac Reads Heartstopper Season Two" class="RponsiveImageContaer-eybHBd fptoWY rponsive-image__image" src="></noscript></picture></div></div></span></a></div><div class="SummaryItemContent-eiDYMl XMZX summary-em__ntent"><div class="RubricWrapper-dKmCNX gPBNpL bric SummaryItemRubric-dguGKN lapGFj summary-em__bric"><span class="RubricName-fVtemz cLxcNi">TV and Movi</span></div><a class="SummaryItemHedLk-civM jRfyII summary-em-trackg__hed-lk summary-em__hed-lk summary-em__hed-lk--unrle-disable" data-ponent-type="recirc-river" data-recirc-id="em-hed-4" data-recirc-pattern="summary-em" href=" target="_self"><div data-ttid="ClampWrapper" class="ClampWrapper-kZxfkB hTTNGO clamp SummaryItemHedBase-hiFYpQ jbVqqA summary-em__hed"><div class="ClampContent-hilPkr jVhSBH"><div class="SummaryItemHedTag-TWblf gxaOcP" data-ttid="SummaryItemHed">All the Queer Books Isaac Reads <em>Heartstopper</em> Season Two</div></div></div></a><div class="SummaryItemByleWrapper-boCfbi cuRXdL summary-em__byle-date-in"><div class="SummaryItemBaseByle-fFbXkY dHMSJg summary-em__byle"><div class="summary-em__byle__ntent"><div data-ttid="BylWrapper" class="BylWrapper-KIudk irTIfE byl"><p class="ByleWrapper-jWHrLH ecFEgL byle byl__byle" data-ttid="ByleWrapper" emProp="thor" emType="><span emProp="name" class="ByleNamWrapper-jbHncj fuDQVo"><span data-ttid="ByleName" class="ByleName-kwmrLn cYaBaU byle__name">Abby Monteil</span></span></p></div></div></div></div></div></div></li><li><div class="AdWrapper-dQtivb fZrssQ RecircMostPopularSummaryItem-jQxxiw gmWMTZ ad ad--asi"><div class="ad__slot ad__slot--asi" data-no-id="okz2pb"></div></div></li></ul><div class="RecircMostPopularFooter-enPjgs laPXdt"></div></div></div></div><div class="StickyBoxPlaceholr-grPmrg dxAvXx"></div></div></div></div><div class="RowWrapper-UmqTg HEhan full-bleed-ad row-mid-ntent-ad"><div class="StickyMidContentAdWrapper-fSBzwl drzyIa ad-stickymidntent"><div class="AdWrapper-dQtivb fZrssQ ad ad--mid-ntent should-hold-space"><div class="ad__slot ad__slot--mid-ntent" data-no-id="cqwiwq"></div></div></div></div><div class="GridWrapper-cAzTTK kHBDeH grid grid-margs grid-ems-2 ArticlePageChunksGrid-hfxa bjczjj grid-layout--adrail narrow wi-adrail"><div class="GridItem-buujkM stRKV grid--em grid-layout__ntent"><div class="BodyWrapper-kufPGa bectqB body body__ntaer article__body" data-journey-hook="client-ntent" data-ttid="BodyWrapper"><div class="body__ner-ntaer"><p>I thk beg onle is my dream closet. I thk a lot of queers who exist siarly to me fd their safe spac on social media, even if they still have to hi their inti. It’s so much fun beg queer onle, but may not be as much fun outsi of . In the real world, you risk beg ostracized, kicked out, harassed, discrimated agast, attacked, etc. If every day felt as safe and wonrful as the Pri para feels, that would be amazg bee we make each other feel so loved when we <em>fd each other</em>. I tomatilly feel close to another queer person, the faial nnectn is explible.</p><asi aria-hidn="te" class="PullQuoteEmbedWrapper-sc-EoVjf fQbAzo"><div class="PullQuoteDerativeBorr-sc-iUyOLj fAzNVP"></div><div class="PullQuoteEmbedContent-sc-kTcfhx eoUd"><p>“My closet is a nway whout show not or a name.”</p></div></asi><h2><strong>Jerma Frh (also known as Jucci), Black Caribbean queer streetwear signer (he/him)</strong></h2><p>I n't always say the plexy of g out aids whichever muny will accept me, bee that is exactly the problem. I exist as part of and navigate the muni ncurrently, not nsecutively. I'm not Black one day, gay the next, and first generatn the followg day. Sometim the muni we belong to don't know how to make space for someone so radilly different om them. Beg queer Jamai, my mother untry, has long been owned upon, meang many tim I mt choose between my inti to be accepted by eher. Like serly, what is the prospect of g out at the st of the very support you need?</p><p>I've bee acctomed to -swchg my whole life — if was to f wh the Black kids, the whe kids, or non-Black employers, I even tch myself -swchg to f wh the members of the queer muny. When I'm around other Jamains, I keep to myself and say very ltle, often feigng naivety to draw attentn away om my queerns and when I'm around queer folks, I often act more flamboyantly and extroverted.</p><p>My closet is a nway whout show not or a name. A seemgly endls amount of surpris and looks emerge om somewhere out of sight behd a curta somewhere. The them and cu might be lost to the untraed eye, but my queerns is still on display s own unique way.</p><asi aria-hidn="te" class="PullQuoteEmbedWrapper-sc-EoVjf fQbAzo"><div class="PullQuoteDerativeBorr-sc-iUyOLj fAzNVP"></div><div class="PullQuoteEmbedContent-sc-kTcfhx eoUd"><p>“I, unfortunately, nsir myself a pro at -swchg.”</p></div></asi><div role="headg" aria-level="3" class="headg-h3"><strong>Fabliha Anbar, sapphic Banglashi and founr of South Asian Queer + Trans Collective (SAQTC) (she/her)</strong></div><p>I spend at least 90% of my day puttg a ont up a heteronormative society to protect myself, for not only my physil safety but my mental health as well. I, unfortunately, nsir myself a pro at -swchg, as I had to do this throughout middle school, high school, and even my primary job. I work as a Cultural Communy anizer for Arts & Democracy, where I work wh the Banglashi muny Kensgton to cultivate a safe space for folks to creatively exprs themselv. Oftentim, I have to nnect wh the nti and uncl my neighborhood. This means I have to make sure to not only act a certa way but to not tat my fay's reputatn as they know my parents as well.</p></div></div></div><div class="GridItem-buujkM fVLMby grid--em grid-layout__asi"><div class="StickyBoxWrapper-jfYB jxBcTH sticky-box"><div class="StickyBoxPrimary-dzWDWL cdhYoN sticky-box__primary"><div class="AdWrapper-dQtivb fZrssQ ad ad--rail"><div class="ad__slot ad__slot--rail" data-no-id="xqn9mc"></div></div><div class="ConsumerMarketgUnThemedWrapper-iUTMTf jssHut nsumer-marketg-un nsumer-marketg-un--display-rail" role="prentatn" aria-hidn="te"><div class="nsumer-marketg-un__slot nsumer-marketg-un__slot--display-rail"></div><div class="journey-un"></div></div><div data-attr-viewport-monor="" class="RecircMostPopularWrapper-bRuGTi jkTTgR recirc-most-popular-wrapper viewport-monor-anchor"><div class="RecircMostPopularConter-jiViNn ktrplG recirc-most-popular-sparrow-trackg hi-asi-ad" data-most-popular-id="mod-most-popular-427"><div 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class="RubricWrapper-dKmCNX gPBNpL bric SummaryItemRubric-dguGKN lapGFj summary-em__bric"><span class="RubricName-fVtemz cLxcNi">TV and Movi</span></div><a class="SummaryItemHedLk-civM jRfyII summary-em-trackg__hed-lk summary-em__hed-lk summary-em__hed-lk--unrle-disable" data-ponent-type="recirc-river" data-recirc-id="em-hed-4" data-recirc-pattern="summary-em" href=" target="_self"><div data-ttid="ClampWrapper" class="ClampWrapper-kZxfkB hTTNGO clamp SummaryItemHedBase-hiFYpQ jbVqqA summary-em__hed"><div class="ClampContent-hilPkr jVhSBH"><div class="SummaryItemHedTag-TWblf gxaOcP" data-ttid="SummaryItemHed">All the Queer Books Isaac Reads <em>Heartstopper</em> Season Two</div></div></div></a><div class="SummaryItemByleWrapper-boCfbi cuRXdL summary-em__byle-date-in"><div class="SummaryItemBaseByle-fFbXkY dHMSJg summary-em__byle"><div class="summary-em__byle__ntent"><div data-ttid="BylWrapper" class="BylWrapper-KIudk irTIfE byl"><p class="ByleWrapper-jWHrLH ecFEgL byle byl__byle" data-ttid="ByleWrapper" emProp="thor" emType="><span emProp="name" class="ByleNamWrapper-jbHncj fuDQVo"><span data-ttid="ByleName" class="ByleName-kwmrLn cYaBaU byle__name">Abby Monteil</span></span></p></div></div></div></div></div></div></li><li><div class="AdWrapper-dQtivb fZrssQ RecircMostPopularSummaryItem-jQxxiw gmWMTZ ad ad--asi"><div class="ad__slot ad__slot--asi" data-no-id="ybgpgu"></div></div></li></ul><div class="RecircMostPopularFooter-enPjgs laPXdt"></div></div></div></div><div class="StickyBoxPlaceholr-grPmrg dxAvXx"></div></div></div></div><div class="RowWrapper-UmqTg HEhan full-bleed-ad row-mid-ntent-ad"><div class="StickyMidContentAdWrapper-fSBzwl drzyIa ad-stickymidntent"><div class="AdWrapper-dQtivb fZrssQ ad ad--mid-ntent should-hold-space"><div class="ad__slot ad__slot--mid-ntent" data-no-id="b9qyzr"></div></div></div></div><div class="GridWrapper-cAzTTK kHBDeH grid grid-margs grid-ems-2 ArticlePageChunksGrid-hfxa bjczjj grid-layout--adrail narrow wi-adrail"><div class="GridItem-buujkM stRKV grid--em grid-layout__ntent"><div class="BodyWrapper-kufPGa bectqB body body__ntaer article__body" data-journey-hook="client-ntent" data-ttid="BodyWrapper"><div class="body__ner-ntaer"><p>Sce quarante has begun and <a data-offer-url=" class="external-lk" data-event-click="{"element":"ExternalLk","outgogURL":"" href=" rel="nofollow noopener" target="_blank">SAQTC</a> went virtual, I had to start anizg and facilate events and workshops om home while livg wh my parents our small two-bedroom apartment, who have no ia that their dghter is gay. Now that I anize SAQTC om home, I am forced to filter myself nstantly while talkg to participants sce my parents are the other room. Sce we are now all stuck at home due to the panmic, I have to act a certa way whout a release or a break. It feels as though I have been wearg a stume for the past six months. As a brown dghter, I am already nstantly unr surveillance, so I have to be extremely reful wh what I say so that I don't risk my safety. I take the language barrier between my parents and me to my advantage, but is still credibly drag mentally.</p><div data-attr-viewport-monor="le-recirc" class="le-recirc-wrapper le-recirc-observer-target-2 viewport-monor-anchor"></div><p>My closet is a utopia. Inspired by Rokeya Sakhawat Hossa's short story “Sultana's Dream,” which explor a utopia where no cis men exist, my utopia is a land where no cishet people live. Queer dividuals would be ee to look and act however they want whout ever needg to -swch for survival or to please anyone.</p><asi aria-hidn="te" class="PullQuoteEmbedWrapper-sc-EoVjf fQbAzo"><div class="PullQuoteDerativeBorr-sc-iUyOLj fAzNVP"></div><div class="PullQuoteEmbedContent-sc-kTcfhx eoUd"><p>“Beg queer and Mlim means you mt be selective about who you open up to.”</p></div></asi><div role="headg" aria-level="3" class="headg-h3"><strong>Omar Zayed, Mlim Egyptian-Canadian textile sign stunt on the asexualy spectm (he/him)</strong></div><p>Complitg the closet means unrstandg that g out is gog to be different for everybody. I was talkg to my iend the other day and we said that g out is so five years ago. Comg out is you puttg yourself a social box. If you are okay wh that, that is totally fair, but I personally do not want to put myself that box.</p><p>Beg queer and Mlim means you mt be selective about who you open up to. I am not tryg to promote the ia that queerns is necsarily shut out of all Mlim muni, but many tradnal Mlim muni, is. In the sphere of home life, I feel like there is still the expectatn to get married and have kids, but wh my immediate fay, I don’t act ls queer than I do wh my iends. It's different wh my extend fay. They hold a limed place my life and the tim I share wh them I am fe wh puttg parts of myself away. You n exist your own way and be reful about how you take up that space to protect yourself. I’m dog for my own fort level.</p><p>People sometim tomatilly assume I am gay and I don’t even rrect them anymore bee I don’t feel like havg that -pth nversatn. I’ve e to a pot where I rrect people if I feel like is worth and I want to be close to this person. A lot of people don’t know what <a href=">asexualy</a> is and I’m not tryg to be someone’s teacher.</p><p>My reimaged closet is the club, clothg, where I n be my bt queer self, and shoppg wh my girliends at the mall. I am realizg I n exist multiple spher of myself. My asexualy is a spectm and is ntgent on a lot of factors. You n’t jt tell yourself you are what you are and not work on or thk about . You mt reexame that and nstantly be tune wh how fluid you are.</p><p><em>Interviews have been nnsed and eded for clary.</em></p><p><em><strong>Get the bt of what’s queer.</strong></em> <a href=">Sign up for <em>them</em>.'s weekly newsletter here.</a></p></div></div></div><div class="GridItem-buujkM fVLMby grid--em grid-layout__asi"><div class="StickyBoxWrapper-jfYB jxBcTH sticky-box"><div class="StickyBoxPrimary-dzWDWL cdhYoN sticky-box__primary"><div class="AdWrapper-dQtivb fZrssQ ad ad--rail"><div class="ad__slot ad__slot--rail" data-no-id="tpoim"></div></div><div class="ConsumerMarketgUnThemedWrapper-iUTMTf jssHut nsumer-marketg-un nsumer-marketg-un--display-rail" role="prentatn" aria-hidn="te"><div class="nsumer-marketg-un__slot nsumer-marketg-un__slot--display-rail"></div><div class="journey-un"></div></div></div><div class="StickyBoxPlaceholr-grPmrg dxAvXx"></div></div></div></div></div><div class="GridWrapper-cAzTTK kHBDeH grid grid-margs grid-ems-2 PaywallInleBarrierWhWrapperGrid-fyrGfS kLQIUk grid-layout--adrail narrow wi-adrail"><div class="GridItem-buujkM stRKV grid--em grid-layout__ntent"><div class="body body__le-barrier article__body"><div class="ntaer ntaer--body"><div class="ntaer--body-ner"><asi class="PaywallInleBarrierWrapper-iBnuqk lfXXa-D" data-ttid="PaywallInleBarrierWrapper"><div class="ConsumerMarketgUnThemedWrapper-iUTMTf jssHut nsumer-marketg-un nsumer-marketg-un--paywall-le-barrier" role="prentatn" aria-live="pole" aria-hidn="te"><div class="nsumer-marketg-un__slot nsumer-marketg-un__slot--paywall-le-barrier"></div><div class="journey-un"></div></div></asi></div></div></div></div></div></div><div class="GridWrapper-cAzTTK kHBDeH grid grid-margs grid-ems-2 ContentWrapperGrid-fvkmBv brYtrA grid-layout--adrail narrow wi-adrail"><div class="GridItem-buujkM stRKV grid--em grid-layout__ntent"><div class="body body__ntaer"><div class="ntaer ntaer--body"><div class="ntaer--body-ner"></div></div></div></div></div></div></article><div class="ContentFooterWrapper-jVNdRG dTJkpP ArticlePageContentFooterGrid-ccsXYy eMZRHU article-body__footer"><div class="RowWrapper-UmqTg HEhan"><div class="GridWrapper-cAzTTK kHBDeH grid grid-margs grid-ems-2 grid-layout--adrail narrow wi-adrail"><div class="GridItem-buujkM stRKV grid--em grid-layout__ntent"></div></div></div><div class="RowWrapper-UmqTg HEhan"><div class="GridWrapper-cAzTTK kHBDeH grid grid-margs grid-ems-2 grid-layout--adrail narrow wi-adrail"><div class="GridItem-buujkM stRKV grid--em grid-layout__ntent"><div data-ttid="TagCloudWrapper" class="TagCloudWrapper-gGgndx jkqdij ContentFooterTagCloud-krQmRG ZLGh"><span class="BaseWrap-sc-gjQpdd BaseText-ewhhUZ TagCloudSectnHear-cOforY iUEiRd chxZaG kQQRmu">Tags</span><a href="/tags/g-out" class="BaseWrap-sc-gjQpdd BaseText-ewhhUZ BaseLk-eNWuiM TagCloudLk-kvjZFu iUEiRd hSmufO fWJQiy hIhJOI"><span class="BaseWrap-sc-gjQpdd BaseText-ewhhUZ TagCloudName-eAUnLd iUEiRd gSGCJB bUkXwu">g out</span></a><a href="/tags/lgbtq-muny" class="BaseWrap-sc-gjQpdd BaseText-ewhhUZ BaseLk-eNWuiM TagCloudLk-kvjZFu iUEiRd hSmufO fWJQiy hIhJOI"><span class="BaseWrap-sc-gjQpdd BaseText-ewhhUZ TagCloudName-eAUnLd iUEiRd gSGCJB bUkXwu">LGBTQ+ muny</span></a><a href="/tags/inty" class="BaseWrap-sc-gjQpdd BaseText-ewhhUZ BaseLk-eNWuiM TagCloudLk-kvjZFu iUEiRd hSmufO fWJQiy hIhJOI"><span class="BaseWrap-sc-gjQpdd BaseText-ewhhUZ TagCloudName-eAUnLd iUEiRd gSGCJB bUkXwu">inty</span></a></div></div></div></div><div data-ttid="ContentFooterBottom" class="ContentFooterBottom-jwWZfC kcbyiW"><div class="ntent-bottom-anchor"></div><div class="ConsumerMarketgUnThemedWrapper-iUTMTf jssHut nsumer-marketg-un nsumer-marketg-un--article-footer" role="prentatn" aria-hidn="te"><div class="nsumer-marketg-un__slot nsumer-marketg-un__slot--article-footer"></div><div class="journey-un"></div></div><div data-attr-viewport-monor="" class="recirc-list-wrapper 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siz="100vw"/><source media="(m-width: 768px)" srcSet=" 120w, 240w, 320w, 640w" siz="100vw"/><img alt="Why Artists Are Still Choosg to Come Out Their Mic" class="RponsiveImageContaer-eybHBd fptoWY rponsive-image__image" src="></noscript></picture></div></div></span></a></div><div class="SummaryItemContent-eiDYMl XMZX summary-em__ntent"><div class="RubricWrapper-dKmCNX gPBNpL bric SummaryItemRubric-dguGKN lapGFj summary-em__bric"><span class="RubricName-fVtemz cLxcNi">Culture</span></div><a class="SummaryItemHedLk-civM dVrbhU summary-em-trackg__hed-lk summary-em__hed-lk summary-em__hed-lk--unrle-disable" data-ponent-type="recirc-river" data-recirc-id="em-hed-1" data-recirc-pattern="summary-em" href="/story/lil-nas-x-janelle-monae-sophie-g-out-mic" target="_self"><div data-ttid="ClampWrapper" class="ClampWrapper-kZxfkB hTTNGO clamp SummaryItemHedBase-hiFYpQ kBFaWv summary-em__hed"><div class="ClampContent-hilPkr jVhSBH"><div class="SummaryItemHedTag-TWblf gxaOcP" data-ttid="SummaryItemHed">Why Artists Are Still Choosg to Come Out Their Mic</div></div></div></a><div class="SummaryItemByleWrapper-boCfbi cuRXdL summary-em__byle-date-in"><div class="SummaryItemBaseByle-fFbXkY dHMSJg summary-em__byle"><div class="summary-em__byle__ntent"><div data-ttid="BylWrapper" class="BylWrapper-KIudk irTIfE byl"><p class="ByleWrapper-jWHrLH ecFEgL byle byl__byle" data-ttid="ByleWrapper" emProp="thor" emType="><span emProp="name" class="ByleNamWrapper-jbHncj fuDQVo"><span data-ttid="ByleName" class="ByleName-kwmrLn cYaBaU byle__name"><span class="BaseWrap-sc-gjQpdd BaseText-ewhhUZ BylePreamble-iJolpQ iUEiRd bCbgyH gnILss byle__preamble">By </span>Michelle Hyun Kim</span></span></p></div></div></div></div></div></div><div class="SummaryItemWrapper-iwvBff gjCHLu summary-em summary-em--has-le summary-em--article summary-em--no-in summary-em--text-align-left summary-em--layout-placement-text-below summary-em--layout-posn-image-left summary-em--layout-proportns-50-50 summary-em--si-by-si-align-center summary-em--si-by-si-image-right-mobile-false summary-em--standard SummaryCollectnGridSummaryItem-WColm hCwuiO" role="button" tabx="0"><div class="SummaryItemAssetContaer-gwhFFH VOyg summary-em__asset-ntaer"><a class="SummaryItemImageLk-dshqxb cPpCwE summary-em__image-lk summary-em-trackg__image-lk" href="/story/high-school-ten-years-later" aria-hidn="te" tabx="-1" data-ponent-type="recirc-river" data-recirc-id="em-image-2" data-recirc-pattern="summary-em" target="_self"><span class="SpanWrapper-umhxW kGxnNB rponsive-asset SummaryItemRponsiveAsset-hjGIGg bDvSkO summary-em__image"><div data-tt="aspect-rat-ntaer" class="AspectRatContaer-bJHpJz hlQxkn"><div class="aspect-rat--overlay-ntaer"><picture class="RponsiveImagePicture-cWuUZO dUOtEa SummaryItemRponsiveAsset-hjGIGg bDvSkO summary-em__image rponsive-image"><noscript><source media="(max-width: 767px)" srcSet=" 120w, 240w, 320w, 640w" siz="100vw"/><source media="(m-width: 768px)" srcSet=" 120w, 240w, 320w, 640w" siz="100vw"/><img alt="How Beg Out Has Gotten Better (or Not) 10 Years Sce I Left High School" class="RponsiveImageContaer-eybHBd fptoWY rponsive-image__image" src="></noscript></picture></div></div></span></a></div><div class="SummaryItemContent-eiDYMl XMZX summary-em__ntent"><div class="RubricWrapper-dKmCNX gPBNpL bric SummaryItemRubric-dguGKN lapGFj summary-em__bric"><span class="RubricName-fVtemz cLxcNi">Culture</span></div><a class="SummaryItemHedLk-civM dVrbhU summary-em-trackg__hed-lk summary-em__hed-lk summary-em__hed-lk--unrle-disable" data-ponent-type="recirc-river" data-recirc-id="em-hed-2" data-recirc-pattern="summary-em" href="/story/high-school-ten-years-later" target="_self"><div data-ttid="ClampWrapper" class="ClampWrapper-kZxfkB hTTNGO clamp SummaryItemHedBase-hiFYpQ kBFaWv summary-em__hed"><div class="ClampContent-hilPkr jVhSBH"><div class="SummaryItemHedTag-TWblf gxaOcP" data-ttid="SummaryItemHed">How Beg Out Has Gotten Better (or Not) 10 Years Sce I Left High School</div></div></div></a><div class="SummaryItemByleWrapper-boCfbi cuRXdL summary-em__byle-date-in"><div class="SummaryItemBaseByle-fFbXkY dHMSJg summary-em__byle"><div class="summary-em__byle__ntent"><div data-ttid="BylWrapper" class="BylWrapper-KIudk irTIfE byl"><p class="ByleWrapper-jWHrLH ecFEgL byle byl__byle" data-ttid="ByleWrapper" emProp="thor" emType="><span emProp="name" class="ByleNamWrapper-jbHncj fuDQVo"><span data-ttid="ByleName" class="ByleName-kwmrLn cYaBaU byle__name"><span class="BaseWrap-sc-gjQpdd BaseText-ewhhUZ BylePreamble-iJolpQ iUEiRd bCbgyH gnILss byle__preamble">By </span>Jill Gutowz</span></span></p></div></div></div></div></div></div><div class="SummaryItemWrapper-iwvBff gjCHLu summary-em summary-em--has-le summary-em--article summary-em--no-in summary-em--text-align-left summary-em--layout-placement-text-below summary-em--layout-posn-image-left summary-em--layout-proportns-50-50 summary-em--si-by-si-align-center summary-em--si-by-si-image-right-mobile-false summary-em--standard SummaryCollectnGridSummaryItem-WColm hCwuiO" role="button" tabx="0"><div class="SummaryItemAssetContaer-gwhFFH VOyg summary-em__asset-ntaer"><a class="SummaryItemImageLk-dshqxb cPpCwE summary-em__image-lk summary-em-trackg__image-lk" href="/story/g-out-day-2020-sam-brton-nversn-therapy" aria-hidn="te" tabx="-1" data-ponent-type="recirc-river" data-recirc-id="em-image-3" data-recirc-pattern="summary-em" target="_self"><span class="SpanWrapper-umhxW kGxnNB rponsive-asset SummaryItemRponsiveAsset-hjGIGg bDvSkO summary-em__image"><div data-tt="aspect-rat-ntaer" class="AspectRatContaer-bJHpJz hlQxkn"><div class="aspect-rat--overlay-ntaer"><picture class="RponsiveImagePicture-cWuUZO dUOtEa SummaryItemRponsiveAsset-hjGIGg bDvSkO summary-em__image rponsive-image"><noscript><source media="(max-width: 767px)" srcSet=" 120w, 240w, 320w, 640w" siz="100vw"/><source media="(m-width: 768px)" srcSet=" 120w, 240w, 320w, 640w" siz="100vw"/><img alt="As a Conversn Therapy Survivor, I Come Out So That Others Won’t Ever Feel Alone" class="RponsiveImageContaer-eybHBd fptoWY rponsive-image__image" src="></noscript></picture></div></div></span></a></div><div class="SummaryItemContent-eiDYMl XMZX summary-em__ntent"><div class="RubricWrapper-dKmCNX gPBNpL bric SummaryItemRubric-dguGKN lapGFj summary-em__bric"><span class="RubricName-fVtemz cLxcNi">Communy</span></div><a class="SummaryItemHedLk-civM dVrbhU summary-em-trackg__hed-lk summary-em__hed-lk summary-em__hed-lk--unrle-disable" data-ponent-type="recirc-river" data-recirc-id="em-hed-3" data-recirc-pattern="summary-em" href="/story/g-out-day-2020-sam-brton-nversn-therapy" target="_self"><div data-ttid="ClampWrapper" class="ClampWrapper-kZxfkB hTTNGO clamp SummaryItemHedBase-hiFYpQ kBFaWv summary-em__hed"><div class="ClampContent-hilPkr jVhSBH"><div class="SummaryItemHedTag-TWblf gxaOcP" data-ttid="SummaryItemHed">As a Conversn Therapy Survivor, I Come Out So That Others Won’t Ever Feel Alone</div></div></div></a><div class="SummaryItemByleWrapper-boCfbi cuRXdL summary-em__byle-date-in"><div class="SummaryItemBaseByle-fFbXkY dHMSJg summary-em__byle"><div class="summary-em__byle__ntent"><div data-ttid="BylWrapper" class="BylWrapper-KIudk irTIfE byl"><p class="ByleWrapper-jWHrLH ecFEgL byle byl__byle" data-ttid="ByleWrapper" emProp="thor" emType="><span emProp="name" class="ByleNamWrapper-jbHncj fuDQVo"><span data-ttid="ByleName" class="ByleName-kwmrLn cYaBaU byle__name"><span class="BaseWrap-sc-gjQpdd BaseText-ewhhUZ BylePreamble-iJolpQ iUEiRd bCbgyH gnILss byle__preamble">By </span>Sam Brton</span></span></p></div></div></div></div></div></div><div class="AdWrapper-dQtivb fZrssQ SummaryCollectnGridSummaryItem-WColm hCwuiO ad ad--read-more"><div class="ad__slot ad__slot--read-more" data-no-id="4s9nyd"></div></div><div class="SummaryItemWrapper-iwvBff gjCHLu summary-em summary-em--has-le summary-em--article summary-em--no-in summary-em--text-align-left summary-em--layout-placement-text-below summary-em--layout-posn-image-left summary-em--layout-proportns-50-50 summary-em--si-by-si-align-center summary-em--si-by-si-image-right-mobile-false summary-em--standard SummaryCollectnGridSummaryItem-WColm hCwuiO" role="button" tabx="0"><div class="SummaryItemAssetContaer-gwhFFH VOyg summary-em__asset-ntaer"><a class="SummaryItemImageLk-dshqxb cPpCwE summary-em__image-lk summary-em-trackg__image-lk" href="/story/g-out-on-tiktok" aria-hidn="te" tabx="-1" data-ponent-type="recirc-river" data-recirc-id="em-image-4" data-recirc-pattern="summary-em" target="_self"><span class="SpanWrapper-umhxW kGxnNB rponsive-asset SummaryItemRponsiveAsset-hjGIGg bDvSkO summary-em__image"><div data-tt="aspect-rat-ntaer" class="AspectRatContaer-bJHpJz hlQxkn"><div class="aspect-rat--overlay-ntaer"><picture class="RponsiveImagePicture-cWuUZO dUOtEa SummaryItemRponsiveAsset-hjGIGg bDvSkO summary-em__image rponsive-image"><noscript><source media="(max-width: 767px)" srcSet=" 120w, 240w, 320w, 640w" siz="100vw"/><source media="(m-width: 768px)" srcSet=" 120w, 240w, 320w, 640w" siz="100vw"/><img alt="Comg Out on TikTok Is Chaotic, Weird, Hilar, and Heartwarmg" class="RponsiveImageContaer-eybHBd fptoWY rponsive-image__image" src="></noscript></picture></div></div></span></a></div><div class="SummaryItemContent-eiDYMl XMZX summary-em__ntent"><div class="RubricWrapper-dKmCNX gPBNpL bric SummaryItemRubric-dguGKN lapGFj summary-em__bric"><span class="RubricName-fVtemz cLxcNi">Culture</span></div><a class="SummaryItemHedLk-civM dVrbhU summary-em-trackg__hed-lk summary-em__hed-lk summary-em__hed-lk--unrle-disable" data-ponent-type="recirc-river" data-recirc-id="em-hed-4" data-recirc-pattern="summary-em" href="/story/g-out-on-tiktok" target="_self"><div data-ttid="ClampWrapper" class="ClampWrapper-kZxfkB hTTNGO clamp SummaryItemHedBase-hiFYpQ kBFaWv summary-em__hed"><div class="ClampContent-hilPkr jVhSBH"><div class="SummaryItemHedTag-TWblf gxaOcP" data-ttid="SummaryItemHed">Comg Out on TikTok Is Chaotic, Weird, Hilar, and Heartwarmg</div></div></div></a><div class="SummaryItemByleWrapper-boCfbi cuRXdL summary-em__byle-date-in"><div class="SummaryItemBaseByle-fFbXkY dHMSJg summary-em__byle"><div class="summary-em__byle__ntent"><div data-ttid="BylWrapper" class="BylWrapper-KIudk irTIfE byl"><p class="ByleWrapper-jWHrLH ecFEgL byle byl__byle" data-ttid="ByleWrapper" emProp="thor" emType="><span emProp="name" class="ByleNamWrapper-jbHncj fuDQVo"><span data-ttid="ByleName" class="ByleName-kwmrLn cYaBaU byle__name"><span class="BaseWrap-sc-gjQpdd BaseText-ewhhUZ BylePreamble-iJolpQ iUEiRd bCbgyH gnILss byle__preamble">By </span>Samantha Allen</span></span></p></div></div></div></div></div></div></div><div class="SummaryCollectnGridToActnWrapper-gnReGN eGayfk"></div></div></div></div></div></div><div class="RowWrapper-UmqTg HEhan"><div class="TaboolaWrapper-hMVdpE iYfBhy"><div class="TaboolaWidgetWrapper-egPIjc hkSrgt TaboolaWidget-eUSdED hQCCRa" data-ttid="TaboolaWidgetWrapper"><div class="TaboolaWidgetContent-iBEQTO eXroXG TABOOLA" id="taboola-below-article-thumbnails---f" data-ttid="TaboolaWidgetContent"></div></div></div></div><div class="RowWrapper-UmqTg HEhan"><div class="AdWrapper-dQtivb fZrssQ ad ad--footer should-hold-space"><div class="ad__slot ad__slot--footer" data-no-id="ne95t"></div></div></div></div></div></ma><div class="BasePageMaFooterFiller-hTlZph jSriYf page__ma-footer-filler"></div><div class="RowWrapper-UmqTg HEhan"><div class="ConsumerMarketgUnThemedWrapper-iUTMTf jssHut nsumer-marketg-un nsumer-marketg-un--cm-footer" role="prentatn" aria-hidn="te"><div class="nsumer-marketg-un__slot nsumer-marketg-un__slot--cm-footer"></div><div class="journey-un"></div></div></div><div class="RowWrapper-UmqTg HEhan BasePageSeFooterRow-kpEBGH jqlJed"><div class="GridWrapper-cAzTTK eRggVV grid grid-margs grid-ems-0 BasePageSeFooterRowGrid-iBGjXL 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