Will soy make my son gay?

Contents:

• HOW GAY IS YOUR FOOD?
• DO JUNK FOOD TURN YOU GAY? 12 OF THE CRAZIT STUDI ABOUT LGBT PEOPLE
• CAN SOY PRODUCTS TURN YOU GAY?
• THE 'GAY DIET'
• STUDY CLAIMS THAT EATG TOO MANY CHICKEN NUGGETS CAN TURN YOU GAY
• WILL SOY MAKE MY SON GAY?
• BIZARRE ‘STUDY’ CLAIMS EATG TOO MANY CHICKEN NUGGETS N TURN YOU GAY

HOW GAY IS YOUR FOOD?

The New York Tim wh the help of Barney's creative ambassador Simon Doonan has cid this week that your food n be gay or article is om the archive of our partner New York Tim wh the help of Barney's creative ambassador Simon Doonan has cid this week that your food n be gay or straight. Apparently, a "gay" food isn't jt a potato that seeks marriage equaly, remds you was born this way, or owns a summer share on Fire Island. Acrdg to Doonan, his new (satiril) book Gay Men Don't Get Fat and his terview wh The Tim today, gay food is lighter, brighter, more artistic, art-directed--food that you'd fd where health and athetics tersect (and that's very different than what Doonan labels "lbian food"--"Organic olive oil, thick porridge, heapg helpgs of wheat germ, " and s ilk).

DO JUNK FOOD TURN YOU GAY? 12 OF THE CRAZIT STUDI ABOUT LGBT PEOPLE

" We enjoyed Doonan's sweepg gay food generalizatns so we put them to the unscientific, anecdotal tt, assigned them a rpective Ksey ratg and me up wh your (pletely unscientific) gui to the sexualy of food, om gayt to straightt:What is: Shi; Sashimi; Cdo; Seafood Tartare; Ceviche What Doonan Says: "Japane food — that is some serly gay food... Basilly, you’re takg sloppy bs of fish and makg them to the exquise ltle bonbons, and that seems ordately gay to me.

CAN SOY PRODUCTS TURN YOU GAY?

" What Ksey Says: The Ksey 6 is "exclively homosexual" What We Say: That sort of mak sense. You'd only eat this food a rtrant servg an assortment Doonan's other gay foods, whether 's an appetizer at an Italian rtrant or a ma at a Japane rtrant--the place probably serv lighter, stylized fare on stunng, perhaps over-worked plat.

THE 'GAY DIET'

The Outlier: Spicy Mayo Anythg Rolls; Supermarket Shi; Any roll wh more than three gredients or one ied object What is: Marons What Doonan Says: "The maron craze is the ne pl ultra of gay foorie. " What Ksey Says: The Ksey 5 is "predomantly homosexual, only cintally heterosexual" What We Say: Though they look like lorful cheeburgers, y, all tak is an "cintal" n- wh Cool Whip to that gay credibily.

" What Ksey Says: The Ksey 4 is "predomantly homosexual, but more than cintally heterosexual" What We Say: Clearly this isn't the first pairg between the black bean soup and the sour-cream pairg.

STUDY CLAIMS THAT EATG TOO MANY CHICKEN NUGGETS CAN TURN YOU GAY

" What Ksey Says: The Ksey 3 is "equally heterosexual and homosexual" or more simply, bisexual. What We Say: Dpe s fat ntent, Doonan mentns that Caar salad and certa pi may tilt more gay than you'd thk.

There are novelty mach ma pecially for pani-makg and grillg and certaly has more flair than a ham and chee on wheat bread--Doonan refers to wheat bread as "ferocly lbian and wildly heterosexual"--but all the hidn meats and chee certaly make this food an equal straddler of gay-straight le. " What Ksey Says: The Ksey 2 is "predomantly heterosexual, but more than cintally homosexual" What We Say: The Tim wrer nces that although the meatloaf is unrelentgly heterosexual, non-potato-based sis like a salad substute n go a long way temperg the Burt Reynolds-ns of this dish. ’" What Ksey Says: The Ksey 1 is "predomantly heterosexual, only cintally homosexual" What We Say: Doonan explas that baked chips are herently gay...

WILL SOY MAKE MY SON GAY?

" What We Say: Burros are the clearly the hate crime of the gay food world and brg together Doonan's unholy try of meat, chee, and avodo (along wh that dodge-worthy sour cream).

Eatg too much fatty food n turn you gay.

Yep, a self-published “study” genuely do claim that eatg too many fatty foods n e homosexualyor make you transgenr. In the document, Strakosha claims: “Homosexuals… [often eat] large amounts of high glycemic x foods and fat, or eatg an imbalanced diet, leang toward rbohydrat. Some studi show an creased rate of oby among homosexuals.

BIZARRE ‘STUDY’ CLAIMS EATG TOO MANY CHICKEN NUGGETS N TURN YOU GAY

“Gay men, lbian and bisexual women report a higher odds of sugar-sweetened beverage nsumptn than straight men and women. The paper ti homosexualy to fats, sugars and alhol, proceedg to claim that cuttg them out of your diet n “prevent the return of homosexual attractns”.

Well, we put to the tt, and after several months of healthy eatg, we’re still gay AF.

Do gay people live near tobac shops? Bad smells make people more opposed to gay marriage.