How to Overe Power Stggl Gay Relatnships • Tom Bett Therapy

Contents:

• HOW TO OVERE POWER STGGL GAY RELATNSHIPS
• GAY RIGHTS
• GAY, LBIAN UPL N TEACH HETEROSEXUALS HOW TO IMPROVE RELATNSHIPS
• GAY RELATNSHIP BREAKUP CAN BE PROBLEMATIC. HERE’S HOW TO AVOID THE RISKS
• HOW TO TACKLE GAY RELATNSHIP PROBLEMS

HOW TO OVERE POWER STGGL GAY RELATNSHIPS

Keywords: timate partner vlence, gay and bisexual men, genr, masculy, same-sex male upl, USAIntroductnIntimate partner vlence is generally fed as terpersonal vlence occurrg between timate partners and may clu multiple domas of vlent behavur (e. Consirable attentn has been paid to timate partner vlence wh heterosexual relatnships and the soc-cultural, dividual, and dyadic forc that predict vlence perpetratn and victimisatn (Jewk 2002) is growg evince that timate partner vlence is a public health problem among gay and bisexual men, wh recent studi suggtg that gay and bisexual men experience timate partner vlence at siar or even higher rat than have been documented among heterosexual women (Fneran and Stephenson 2013). In their review of 28 epimlogil studi, Fneran and Stephenson report that the prevalence of perpetratn or receipt of any timate partner vlence among gay and bisexual men vari om 30% to 78%, wh timat of experiencg vlence vastly outweighg timat of perpetratn (Fneran and Stephenson 2013).

The ercive behavurs may lead to “women’s entrapment” bee they physilly and psychologilly harm women and prive them of “rights and rourc that are cril to personhood and cizenship” (Stark 2007) remas unknown how the ncept of ercive ntrol appli to same-sex male relatnships; however, there has been some rearch to expla the factors that ntribute to timate partner vlence among gay and bisexual men (Craft and Serovich 2005, Fneran and Stephenson 2014, Relf 2001, Well et al. In a study by Fneran et al., gay and bisexual men intified 24 proximal antecents of timate partner vlence, which were characterised to four factors: power and negotiatn characteristics, relatnship characteristics, life strsors, and threats to masculy (Fneran and Stephenson 2014). Some of the antecents may be siar to those typilly examed heterosexual relatnships (Holt, Buckley, and Whelan 2008, Mason and Blankenship 1987); however, further rearch is need to unrstand the ntext of how the antecents are experienced among gay and bisexual men.

In this study, we e data om foc group discsns to explore gay and bisexual men’s perceptns of the sourc of tensn that exist same-sex male relatnships and exame the ways which they may ntribute to timate partner vlence among gay and bisexual men. The rults prented do not tend to pture the personal experienc of those perpetratg or experiencg timate partner vlence, but rather foc on the general perceptns that gay and bisexual men have about timate partner vlence their muni. Unrstandg gay and bisexual men’s perceptns of how sourc of tensn fluence timate partner vlence among gay and bisexual men n help to rm terventns to addrs timate partner vlence this populatn and has the potential to refe measurements ed to unrstand timate partner vlence same-sex male relatnships.

GAY RIGHTS

The venue samplg ame nsisted of a variety of over 160 gay-themed or gay-iendly venu, cludg Gay Pri events, gay sports teams events, gay fundraisg events, downtown areas, gay bars, bathho, an AIDS service anisatn, and urban parks.

GAY, LBIAN UPL N TEACH HETEROSEXUALS HOW TO IMPROVE RELATNSHIPS

Although we scribe the as etandg them, many s, the them also teract wh each 1MeanRangeAge3221–47Race%n Ain Amerin/Black5334 Csian/Whe4730Sexual Orientatn Gay9561 Bisexual53Employment Employed6441 Unemployed3623Edutn College tn or higher3824 Ls than llege tn6240Relatnship stat Sgle4529 In a relatnship5535Genr rol and genr role nflictParticipants scribed normalised genr rol as ntributg to timate partner vlence same-sex male relatnships. And, I mean, I looked gay, or whatever, but [my partner] was, on the DL and he saw somebody that he knew om school, and so he tried to speed up or whatever, and then, I lled him out, basilly, and then he wanted to fight me” (FGD 4) addn, participants also stated that a fear of beg outed uld ntribute to the partner ntrollg the out partner.

“I had a iend who did this, he moved here, he was out wh his fay and everythg…and his boyiend, who was the closet and who was gay, dated and said, ‘I’ll only date if you pretend you’re straight, ’… And his whole self-teem went down, he was like what am I, but he did that for 2 years, and even now he’s like I don’t know what I did, so, that way was ntrollg, and, I don’t know if was vlent, but was abive a way psychologilly, bee he played the rd and ‘to stay wh me you have to stay the closet’” (FGD 6) all foc group discsns, participants also discsed how a difference outns creat a tensn the relatnship where the out partner nnot fully be a part of the partner’s life. “It seems like the Ain-Amerin muny ’s…not as acceptable to be out, ’s not as acceptable to be gay, I thk, there’s a looot higher percentage of people that are the closet I thk, aga, that troduc an ner turmoil, they force outward.

Still, is eful to unrstand the ways that gay and bisexual men perceive timate partner vlence among same-sex male upl bee the perceptns (whether accurate or based on assumptns) n fluence the experienc of those who are vlent relatnships and the rpons by the unrstandg gay and bisexual men’s perceptns of timate partner vlence, is eful to nsir a lens that appli the ncept of ercive ntrol, which has typilly been ed to scribe timate partner vlence heterosexual relatnships (Stark 2007).

GAY RELATNSHIP BREAKUP CAN BE PROBLEMATIC. HERE’S HOW TO AVOID THE RISKS

Not all men are men are “domant” and not all gay and bisexual men seek stereotypil genred rol same-sex male relatnships), they still highlight that power dynamics some same-sex male relatnships n be fluenced (or at least are perceived to be fluenced) by a stereotypil versn of hegemonic masculy and genr issue of power imbalanc a relatnship was even more plex when men discsed dyadic differenc outns. Dyadic differenc outns as a possible source of tensn is one that is unique to same-sex relatnships and is eful to to regnise when tryg to fe and measure timate partner vlence among gay and bisexual men (Stephenson and Fneran 2013). Sourc of tensn rultg om asymmetri outns illtrate how homophobic stigma and the difficulti of disclosg sexual inty n ntribute to other negative health out for gay and bisexual men, such as timate partner vlence.

Prev rearch has intified a lk between timate partner vlence and HIV seronversn among gay and bisexual men (Relf 2001); this may be lked to an crease ndomls anal terurse for men experiencg vlence through a limed abily to negotiate for ndom e (Buller et al. Sce cln creria did not require participants to be perpetratg or experiencg timate partner vlence, rults nnot make claims about actual experienc of vlence, though they do scribe the perceptns of gay and bisexual men Atlanta, GA. 2006), addnal rearch that further exam the lived experienc of timate partner vlence same-sex male relatnships is necsary to unrstand how the strs of genr role nflict and the strs of livg a heteronormative society may ntribute to timate partner vlence among gay and bisexual men.

Interventns that addrs homophobic stigma and aim to refe male genr rol same-sex relatnships as more balanced (rather than relyg on domant and submissive rol) may help to addrs some of the tensn that ntribut to timate partner vlence same-sex male relatnships. Approval of same-sex relatnships has been steadily risg sce 2009 (Pew Rearch Center, 2017), and the 2015 Supreme Court cisn endorsg same-sex marriage was a w for many lbian, gay, and bisexual (LGB) dividuals. Another dramatic example of men’s e of homosexual sults as weapons their power stggle wh each other om a document which provis one of the richt se studi of the polics of male-male relatnships to yet appear: Woodward and Bernste’s The Fal Days.

HOW TO TACKLE GAY RELATNSHIP PROBLEMS

Dpe the persistence of stereotyp that portray lbian, gay, and bisexual people as disturbed, several s of rearch and clil experience have led all mastream medil and mental health anizatns this untry to nclu that the orientatns reprent normal forms of human experience.

Helpful rpons of a therapist treatg an dividual who is troubled about her or his same sex attractns clu helpg that person actively pe wh social prejudic agast homosexualy, succsfully rolve issu associated wh and rultg om ternal nflicts, and actively lead a happy and satisfyg life. The phrase “g out” is ed to refer to several aspects of lbian, gay, and bisexual persons’ experienc: self-awarens of same-sex attractns; the tellg of one or a few people about the attractns; wispread disclosure of same-sex attractns; and intifitn wh the lbian, gay, and bisexual muny.