Dad, You're Gay? I Am, Too : NPR

Contents:

• KEN HAS ALWAYS BEEN BARBIE’S GAY BT FRIEND—NOT HER BOYIEND
• ANDY COHEN SAYS BEG THE ONLY SGLE AND GAY PARENT AT HIS SON'S SCHOOL N FEEL 'SURPRISGLY LONELY'
• THE GAY FATHER I NEVER KNEW
• IS YOUR DAD GAY—OR ARE YOU A GAY DAD?
• SGLE GAY DADS GIVE TIPS FOR FIRST-TIME PARENTS: ‘I CREATED THE VILLAGE AROUND MYSELF’
• THREE SGLE, GAY DADS REFLECT ON FATHERHOOD, SURROGACY JOURNEYS
• MOVG PORTRAS OF GAY FATHERS WH THEIR FAI ACROSS AMERI
• THIS AMAZG GAY DAD ADOPTED FIVE FOSTER KIDS TO KEEP THE SIBLGS TOGETHER
• DAD, YOU'RE GAY? I AM, TOO

KEN HAS ALWAYS BEEN BARBIE’S GAY BT FRIEND—NOT HER BOYIEND

He’s Barbie’s gay bt iend. The film won’t say , but a post-creds punchle about Ken’s handwrg, plete wh hearts and stars surroundg his name, tells what we need to heavily implied nature of Ken’s gayns Toy Story 3 harkens back to Hollywood’s tradnal gay bt iend-type characters. In the Hays Co era, explic referenc to homosexualy weren’t allowed, so characters like Van Buren (Frankl Pangborn) 1937’s Easy Livg, Kip (David Wayne) 1949’s Adam’s Rib, or Addison (Gee Sanrs) 1950’s All About Eve stead were imbued wh effemate characteristics, offerg a glimpse outsi of heteronormativy whout explicly beg of the characters were the same—some were tty, others sweet.

But each of the gay bt iends was trsilly fed by their relatnships wh their straight iends. Des later, 2010, the gay bt iend was all the rage; Teen Vogue even went so far as to proclaim the GBF as the summer’s mt-have accsory.

But unlike the first half of the 20th century, today’s cema, the GBF is allowed to be openly gay. In movi like Mean Girls (2004), The Devil Wears Prada (2006), Easy A (2010), No Strgs Attached (2011), and Isn’t It Romantic (2019), gay iends exist entirely the orb of their female iends.

ANDY COHEN SAYS BEG THE ONLY SGLE AND GAY PARENT AT HIS SON'S SCHOOL N FEEL 'SURPRISGLY LONELY'

” But Barbie do, and for Ken, that’s are plenty of reasons why the film wouldn’t outrightly state that Ken is homosexual. ), and of urse, and earrg the “gay ear”.

) Earrg Magic Ken turned Barbie’s boyiend to an out-and-proud homosexual raver. Mattel, of urse, vehemently nied any claims that Ken was gay, let alone that he had somethg as prepostero as a ck rg around his neck. As a rult, gay men bought the doll drov, and spe Mattel ultimately rellg the doll and wipg away any trace of Earrg Magic Ken, was near-impossible to see Ken as anythg but the glor homosexual he was born to be om then on.

THE GAY FATHER I NEVER KNEW

Though Mattel don’t seem to be willg to say Ken is actually gay, the Ken dolls of recent years seem to really lean to Ken’s queerns. While there is no way to “drs gay, ” there are several dolls that seem to suggt otherwise, such as:Fashnista Ken #193, who looks very exced to tell you about his new obssn, Troye Sivan;Travel Ken Doll, who has a satchel perfect for bathho and a purple overnight bag that lerally proclaims he’s “extra;”Ken Looks Doll, servg “I’m gonna give you a makeover”-type realns while sportg black pleather pants;This Ken, who wears the least heterosexual double nim I have a feelg the new Barbie movie will put the work to nvce that Ken is a hetero du who lov nothg life more than Barbie herself, the wrg’s already on the wall: Ken is, and always will be, Barbie’s gay bt obssg!

IS YOUR DAD GAY—OR ARE YOU A GAY DAD?

The measure put gay and lbian marriag on hold the state, but a feral appeals urt 2010 emed Proposn 8 unnstutnal. The se ma s way to the US Supreme Court, which dismissed an appeal 2013 over same-sex marriage on jurisdictnal grounds, lg private parti did not have standg to fend California’s voter-approved ballot measure barrg gay and lbian upl om state-sanctned wedlock.

But to actually be lockg ey wh Ellen and hold her, shakg hands as she said, "I'm gay, " on natnal televisn and for the first time, as she has shared outloud that way publicly, was such a profoundly extraordary and timate gift to that moment that I will forever be grateful for. In late 1980, at a support group for gay fathers, my dad met Lnel –– the man wh whom he would spend the next 23 years. He had seemed kd of lost his new life – phg 60, recently divorced om my mother, recently out of the closet as gay man.

He asked that I march wh him, alongsi the other gay fathers and their kids, the Los Angel Pri Para. What I do remember was that someone had ma T-shirts that said "I LOVE MY GAY DAD" and I refed to wear one. I told my dad, “I love you, but not bee you’re gay.

SGLE GAY DADS GIVE TIPS FOR FIRST-TIME PARENTS: ‘I CREATED THE VILLAGE AROUND MYSELF’

” The tth, though, is that I lacked the urage to stand all the way up for my father and his ras agast a homophobic and different world. I probably left my "I LOVE MY GAY DAD" T-shirt next to the box had e out of, though I might have taken home wh me and buried a drawer. Pete Wilson’s office, or at the Natnal March on Washgton for Lbian and Gay dad and his hband lost a lot of iends to AIDS.

Even when I was an obnox 22-year-old and wouldn’t put on a T-shirt to clare, unashamed, unembarrassed and unapologetic, that I love my gay dad.

THREE SGLE, GAY DADS REFLECT ON FATHERHOOD, SURROGACY JOURNEYS

But a new terview wh the New Yorker, the Watch What Happens Live host adms that beg both the only gay dad and sgle parent at his son's school n feel isolatg. "So far, the two schools that Ben has been , I’ve been the only sgle parent and I’m the only gay parent, " Cohen, 54, tells the magaze. "Ben se that Wyatt [Cooper's olr son] has two gay dads, and there are two gay dads down the hall om , " Cohen not.

I also knew that my dad mt be gay—bee, well, of urse. While I’d never met an out gay man, I kd of knew what they were supposed to be like om movi and TV, and Dad f the mold: He loved to ok; he cleaned obssively; he kept the Internatnal Male talog around, bee, he said, “I like the cloth. “You know, ” I said to Dad, “I asked Mom once if you were gay.

MOVG PORTRAS OF GAY FATHERS WH THEIR FAI ACROSS AMERI

“Gay? “I’m not gay. ” she’d said our kchen—after a long nversatn she’d had wh an openly gay iend om llege, Pat, who had, apparently, been a nfidant of Dad’s.

Years later Mom told me that, acrdg to Pat, Dad had been active Lexgton and Louisville’s gay club scene. ) But to actually let me —to s on that blue blanket, look me the eye and tell me he was gay—was somethg he uldn’t do.

THIS AMAZG GAY DAD ADOPTED FIVE FOSTER KIDS TO KEEP THE SIBLGS TOGETHER

“I asked Mom once if you were gay, ” I would have said. Are you a dghter whose dad is gay?

Or are you a gay dad?

gay: 1. Most children whose dads are gay were born while their blogil mom and blogil dad were married and livg together. If you have a gay dad or a lbian mom, after they separate, which of them is most likely to remarry or to remarry and then divorce?

DAD, YOU'RE GAY? I AM, TOO

Lbian moms are more likely than gay dads to marry their same-sex partner. But gay dads are ls likely to get divorced om their hbands than lbian moms are to get divorced om their wiv. Gay men may experience more discrimatn than lbians, pecially if they are parents.

Our society is still ls acceptg of gay men beg fathers than of lbians beg mothers.

But perhaps the most important rearch fdg is that gay dads and their dghters have closer relatnships when dads tell the tth—and the dads are ls clilly prsed than dads who hi this important rmatn om their children (Tornello, 2018). Sadly, gay fathers are more aaid than lbian mothers to tell their children the tth, regardls of their age. So if you as a dghter or as a gay dad are still tiptoeg around the topic, ’s time to give yourselv a gift by gettg this skeleton out of the closet.