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Ever sce middle school, people have asked Thomas Lloyd the same qutn repeatedly. "If I had a dime for every time I was asked, 'Why am I so gay?' I uld probably pay for one cred at Geetown." In this humoro talk, Lloyd explor the trici of social "verg" as a gay man, fdg muny and the importance of inty ownership.

Contents:

HOW DO YOU KNOW IF YOU’RE GAY, STRAIGHT, OR SOMETHG BETWEEN?

In a society where most are expected to be straight, n be difficult to take a step back and tly ask if you’re gay, straight, or somethg else. There's no "right" way to e to terms wh your orientatn. But there are a few thgs you n do to explore your feelgs and help figure thgs out. Here's how. * so what am gay *

In a society where most of are expected to be straight, n be difficult to take a step back and ask whether you’re gay, straight, or somethg ’re the only person who n figure out what your orientatn tly is. You don’t have to fulfill certa “creria” to qualify as gay, straight, bisexual, or anythg is an aspect of your inty, not a job applitn — and you n intify wh whatever term fs you! ” Plenty of people thought they were one thg for the first half of their life, only to fd that wasn’t ’s also possible to thk you’re gay when you’re actually bi, or thk you’re bi when you’re actually gay, for example.

Your orientatn may change, but that don’t make any ls valid over time, nor do mean you’re wrong or are some people gay? This uld help you segue to the may fd helpful to start wh somethg like:“After thkg about a lot, I’ve realized that I’m gay. Gay - While this adjective has historilly scribed men who are attracted to other men, the term now is ed to refer to anyone who experienc romantic, emotnal, or physil attractn to people of the same genr.

Sce genr inty and sexual orientatn are separate, transgenr people n intify as straight, gay, lbian, bisexual, etc. Keep md that even if you have a sexual experience wh someone of the same genr or another genr, that don’t necsarily mean that you’re gay. That means, for example, that you n be transgenr but also straight (for stance, you might intify as a woman and feel attracted to men) or gay (e.

AM I GAY?

Are you qutng your sexualy? Fd out if you’re gay, straight, bisexual, or asexual. Learn what the terms mean and if they apply to you. * so what am gay *

Article SummaryXIf you’re not sure how to know if you are gay, thk about any past romantic experienc you have had.

If you have had romantic experienc or fantasi volvg people who are the same genr as you, then there is a good chance you are gay or bisexual, but 's okay if you're a ltle nfed.

Jt for funI'm spic that I may be gayI've never had a csh on anyone, and am unsure where I lie on the spectm of sexualyWhat would your ial partner be if you two are gog to spend a week on an island? Havg sex wh the person I love mostCuddlg wh the person I love mostJt beg next to the person I love mostHangg out wh iends / beg aloneHow would you feel if your bt iend me out as gay? When down to , there is no reliable "Am I Gay tt", so the only way to know that you are gay (fn of gay) is to look wh yourself to terme your own thoughts and feelgs towards others of the same sex.

HOW TO KNOW IF YOU ARE GAY

How do I know if I am gay? Are there fe signs you are gay? We have answers. Consir the signs you might be gay. * so what am gay *

And if do turn out that you are gay, remember that there is nothg wrong wh beg gay – is jt part of who you are.

You so obvly nnot be gay, was her implitn, bee this is good was 2006, a full five years before Lady Gaga would set the Born This Way argument atop s unassailable cultural perch, but even then the popular unrstandg of orientatn was that was somethg you were born wh, somethg you uldn’t change. I me out at a nservative Christian llege the US and was a gay relatnship for around two years wh a basketball player who end up marryg a woman. Well, you mt have been gay the whole time, some might thk, and bee of some relig shame, you cid to lie to yourself and experiment wh a girl.

HOW DO I KNOW IF I AM GAY? SIGNS YOU ARE GAY

Men beg attracted to another man emotnally, physilly, and mentally are known as gays. Fd out if you're gay wh our quiz. * so what am gay *

But what feels most accurate to say is that I’m gay – but I wasn’t born this people may fd their sir changg directn - and n't jt be explaed as experimentatn (Cred: Ignac Lehmann)In 1977, jt over 10% of Amerins thought gayns was somethg you were born wh, acrdg to Gallup. Throughout the same perd, the number of Amerins who believe homosexualy is “due to someone’s upbrgg/environment” fell om jt unr 60% to ias reached cril mass pop culture, first wh Lady Gaga’s 2011 Born This Way and one year later wh Macklemore’s Same Love, the chos of which has a gay person sgg “I n’t change even if I tried, even if I wanted to. ” Around the same time, the Human Rights Campaign clared unequivolly that “Beg gay is not a choice, ” and to claim that is “giv unwarranted crence to roundly disproven practic such as nversn or reparative therapy.

”People who challenge the Born This Way narrative are often st as homophobic, and their thkg is nsired backwardAs Jane Ward not Not Gay: Sex Between Straight Whe Men, what’s tertg about many of the claims is how transparent their speakers are wh their polil motivatns.

‘I AM GAY – BUT I WASN’T BORN THIS WAY’

Why are people gay? Are they gay by choice or is beg gay geic? Are they born gay? Learn about the and reasons for beg gay. * so what am gay *

“Such statements, ” she wr, “fe blogil acunts wh an obligatory and nearly ercive force, suggtg that anyone who scrib homosexual sire as a choice or social nstctn is playg to the hands of the enemy.

HOW TO ACCEPT THAT YOU ARE GAY

* so what am gay *

” People who challenge the Born This Way narrative are often st as homophobic, and their thkg is nsired backward – even if they are themselv, for example, Cynthia Nixon of Sex and The Cy fame.

Callg me “idtic” and “patently absurd”, Aravosis wrote, “The gay haters at the relig right uldn’t have wrten any better.

”Gay rights do not have to hge on a geic explanatn for sexualy (Cred: Ignac Lehmann)For Aravosis, and many gay activists like him, the public will only accept and affirm gay people if they thk they were born gay.

AM I GAY? QUIZ – 100% RELIABLE TT

Here are some thgs to keep md if you're thkg you might be gay... * so what am gay *

Patrick Grzanka, Assistant Profsor of Psychology at Universy of Tennsee, for stance, has shown that some people who believe that homosexualy is nate still hold negative views of gays. In fact, the homophobic and non-homophobic rponnts he studied shared siar levels of belief a Born This Way Samantha Allen not at The Daily Beast, the growg public support for gays and lbians has grown out of proportn wh the rise the number of people who believe homosexualy is fixed at birth; would be unlikely that this small change opn uld expla the spike support for gay marriage, for stance.

HOW GAY ARE YOU?

In 1985, only 24% of Amerin rponnts said they had a gay iend, relative or -worker —  2013, that number was at 75%. “It don’t seem to matter as much whether or not people believe that gay people are born that way as do that they simply know someone who is currently gay, ” Allen spe of the studi, those who ph agast Born This Way narrativ have been heavily cricised by gay activists.

Siarly, Ward has received her own hatemail for phg agast the lg LGB narrativ, wh some gays tellg her she’s “worse than Ann Coulter, ” the ntroversial US thor of books like If Democrats Had Any Bras, They’d Be Republins. And when I published my say on choosg to be gay, an irate Amerin lbian activist wrote me that had “jt been nfirmed” to her that my wrg was “directly rponsible for four gay aths Rsia. There is a unanimo opn that gay “nversn therapy” should be rejectedLet’s first be clear that whatever the origs of our sexual orientatn, there is a unanimo opn that gay “nversn therapy” should be rejected.

The efforts are potentially harmful, acrdg to the APA, “bee they prent the view that the sexual orientatn of lbian, gay and bisexual youth is a mental illns of disorr, and they often ame the abily to change one’s sexual orientatn as a personal and moral failure. The APA, for example, while notg that most people experience ltle to no choice over their orientatns, says this of homosexualy’s origs:“Although much rearch has examed the possible geic, hormonal, velopmental, social and cultural fluenc on sexual orientatn, no fdgs have emerged that perm scientists to nclu that sexual orientatn is termed by any particular factor or factors.

WHY ARE PEOPLE GAY? GAY BY CHOICE OR IS BEG GAY GEIC?

”Siarly, the Amerin Psychiatric Associatn wr a 2013 statement that while the of heterosexualy and homosexualy are currently unknown, they are likely “multifactorial cludg blogil and behavral roots which may vary between different dividuals and may even vary over time.

WHY AM I "SO GAY?"

”Te, var eye-grabbg headl over the years have claimed that some scientists have found somethg like The Gay Gene. ” Acrdg to LeVay’s rearch, a specific part of the bra, the third terstial nucls of the anterr hypothalam (INAH-3), is smaller homosexual men than is heterosexual as they might, scientists have stggled to inty any particular gen that nsistently predict the directns of our love and sire (Cred: Ignac Lehmann)Read moreYou n spot the problem wh this study a e away: were the gay bras LeVay studied born that way, or did they bee that way?

Another landmark paper on the origs of homosexualy was published 1993 by a geicist named Dean Hamer, who was terted to learn whether homosexualy uld be hered. Begng om his observatn that there are more gay relativ on a mother’s si than a father’s, Hamer turned his attentn to the X chromosome (which is passed on by the mother).

Bis the dividual criqu leveled agast each new study announcg some gay gene disvery, there are major methodologil cricisms to make about the entire enterprise general, as Grzanka pots out: “If we look at the raveno pursu, particularly among Amerin scientists, to fd a gay gene, what we see is that the ncln has already been arrived at. ”The other problem wh Born This Way science is summed up nicely by Simon Copland: “Scientists are askg whether homosexualy is natural when we n’t even agree exactly what homosexualy is.

Y, I AM GAY. SO, WHAT?: ALICE WONRLANDY, I AM GAY. SO, WHAT?: ALICE WONRLANDY, I AM GAY. SO, WHAT?: ALICE WONRLANDY, I AM GAY. SO, WHAT?: ALICE WONRLANDY, I AM GAY. SO, WHAT?: ALICE WONRLAND

” Our sir may exprs themselv many different ways that do not all nform to existg notns of ‘gay’, ‘straight’ or ‘bisexual’ is one of the bt takeaways of Ward’s Not Gay, a peratg analysis of sex between straight whe men. Gay men make up only a actn of the US populatn — yet Ward says that there are many men not clud that number who engage homosexual behavr. That’s bee terms like ‘heterosexual’ and ‘straight’ and ‘bisexual’ and ‘gay’ e wh all sorts of cultural baggage attached.

Ccially, she argu, “whether or not this baggage is appealg is a separate matter altogether om the appeal of homosexual or heterosexual sex. ”Gay or not, our sir are oriented and re-oriented throughout our liv (Cred: Ignac Lehmann)In fact, the straight-intified men Ward studied for her book sometim found themselv suatns that sparked the sire for homosexual sex: aterni, ployments, public rtrooms, etc.

AM I GAY? HOW DO YOU KNOW IF YOU ARE GAY?

Ward thks this qutn is the next ontier of queer I first said I chose to be gay, a queer Amerin journalist challenged me to name the time and date of my choice. I’m claimg that at some pot durg llege, my sexual and romantic sir beme reoriented toward menThkg back to my llege romanc wh women and men, I n beg to unrstand how my own experienc might have helped me to ‘cultivate’ my sire for homosexualy. I want to be very clear: I’m not claimg I simply began to ‘grow to’ my homosexualy, or that as I beme more fortable wh beg gay, I allowed myself the eedom to exprs what had always been latent wh me.

“Limg our unrstandg of any plex human experience is always gog to be worse than allowg to be plited, ” he gay rights activists pared sexualy to relign - a ccial part of our life that we should be ee to practise however we like (Cred: Ignac Lehamann)So what are we to do wh the Born This Way rhetoric? Sendly, the entire search for a gay gene is predited upon the assumptn that homosexualy is not the natural or ‘flt’ state of a velopg human.

“That’s a very narrow unrstandg of what jtice looks like, ” says about the ncern that homophob will want to ‘enurage’ gay people to be straight if there’s no blogil basis for sexualy? It don’t take too much creativy to image a scenar which homophobic parents, upon beg rmed their fet has ‘the gay gene’, choose what to them may seem the lser of two evils: abortn.

HOW TO COPE WHEN YOU'RE GAY AND LONELY

”Acrdg to surveys, ls than half of Generatn Z intify as "100% heterosexual", suggtg more and more people have embraced their sexual fluidy (Cred: Ignac Lehmann)Perhaps is time to look to the begng of the gay rights movement.

“Then there was a shift, and the lears of the movement chose to jump on board wh a ls nuanced argument that people already unrstood: jt like race, people are born wh their homosexualy. Some experts have even started g tegori like ‘mostly straight’ and ‘mostly gay’ to try and expand our limed ways of viewg human sexualy.

THAT'S SO GAY

” Rponnts were asked to rate themselv on a sle om zero (which signified “pletely straight”) to six (“pletely homosexual”). More than a third chose a number between one and rponse to the poll, one of my Facebook iends quipped about how natural selectn mt be workg overtime, what wh makg all of gay! I’m thankful for a new generatn that is pable of imagg sexualy a way that transcends the gay/straight bary, that uldn’t re ls about what happened to their bodi and mds to make them who they are today.

*BEAR-MAGAZINE.COM* SO WHAT AM GAY

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class="css-zxq36b e9l0kn01"><a emProp="em" href="/lgbtq-teen-life/" data-vars-ga-ux-element="Breadcmbs" data-vars-ga-ll-to-actn="Beg an LGBTQ Teen" data-vars-ga-outbound-lk=" class="e9l0kn00 css-10asp0m e1c1bym14"><span emProp="name">Beg an LGBTQ Teen</span></a><meta emProp="posn" ntent="2" /></li><style data-emotn="css huh8md">{display:none;}{paddg:0.25rem;ntent:">";}</style><li emProp="emListElement" emSpe emType=" class="css-huh8md e9l0kn01"><a emProp="em" href="/life/a14848752/am-i-gay/" data-vars-ga-ux-element="Breadcmbs" data-vars-ga-ll-to-actn="Am I Gay?" data-vars-ga-outbound-lk=" class="e9l0kn00 css-10asp0m e1c1bym14"><span emProp="name">Am I Gay?</span></a><meta emProp="posn" ntent="3" /></li></ol></nav><style data-emotn="css 1rvucsk">{font-fay:GTWalsheim,Helveti,sans-serif;font-weight:normal;grid-lumn:1/-1;marg-bottom:0.9375rem;marg-top:0.9375rem;}@media(max-width: 48rem){{font-size:2.5rem;le-height:1.1;}}@media(m-width: 48rem){{font-size:2.625rem;le-height:1.1;}}@media(m-width: 64rem){{font-size:3rem;le-height:1.1;}}@media(m-width: 73.75rem){{font-size:3.25rem;le-height:1.1;}}</style><h1 class="css-1rvucsk exadjwu10"><span aria-hidn="te" class="css-0 eagam8p0"></span>Am I Gay?<span aria-hidn="te" class="css-0 eagam8p1"></span></h1><style data-emotn="css 1fyfv5q">{font-fay:GTWalsheim,Helveti,sans-serif;font-weight:normal;marg-bottom:0.625rem;}@media(max-width: 48rem){{font-size:1.375rem;le-height:1.2;}}@media(m-width: 48rem){{font-size:1.5rem;le-height:1.2;}} a{-webk-text-ratn:unrle;text-ratn:unrle;text-ratn-thickns:0.0625rem;text-ratn-lor:her;text-unrle-offset:0.25rem;lor:her;-webk-transn:all 0.3s ease--out;transn:all 0.3s ease--out;} a:hover{lor:#595959;text-ratn-lor:borr-lk-body-hover;}</style><div class="css-1fyfv5q exadjwu8"><p>Let's get real about sexualy.</p></div><style data-emotn="css 7lmlrx">{marg-bottom:0.625rem;paddg-right:0.3125rem;font-fay:GTWalsheim,Helveti,sans-serif;font-size:0.75rem;le-height:1.3;letter-spacg:0.05em;text-transform:upperse;} span{le-height:1.6;}</style><div class="css-7lmlrx exadjwu7"><style data-emotn="css rkt8">{font-style:normal;paddg-right:0.3125rem;font-fay:GTWalsheim,Helveti,sans-serif;font-size:0.75rem;le-height:1.3;letter-spacg:0.05em;text-transform:upperse;}</style><addrs class="css-rkt8 ehvvd9m2"><style data-emotn="css q8brce">{paddg-right:0.3125rem;font-fay:GTWalsheim,Helveti,sans-serif;font-size:0.75rem;le-height:1.3;letter-spacg:0.05em;text-transform:upperse;}</style><span class="css-q8brce ehvvd9m1"><style data-emotn="css 1sa04t">{borr-radi:50%;vertil-align:middle;marg-right:0.3125rem;object-f:ver;}</style><img src="" alt="Headshot of Alison Caporimo" tle="Headshot of Alison Caporimo" width="40" height="40" dg="async" fetchPrry="high" class=" css-1sa04t ehvvd9m0" />By <style data-emotn="css 7l5upj">{-webk-text-ratn:unrle;text-ratn:unrle;text-ratn-thickns:0.0625rem;text-ratn-lor:her;text-unrle-offset:0.25rem;lor:her;-webk-transn:all 0.3s ease--out;transn:all 0.3s ease--out;}{lor:#595959;text-ratn-lor:borr-lk-body-hover;}</style><a href="/thor/17433/alison-porimo/" class="css-7l5upj e1c1bym14">Alison Caporimo</a></span><style data-emotn="css w0ebia">{display:le-block;text-transform:upperse;marg-left:0.625rem;}</style><time class="css-w0ebia exadjwu6">Updated: Jun 2, 2021</time></addrs></div></div></div></hear><style data-emotn="css k008qs">{display:-webk-box;display:-webk-flex;display:-ms-flexbox;display:flex;}</style><div class="css-k008qs ewisyje0"><style data-emotn="css 7ce51e">{marg-bottom:0.9375rem;posn:relative;}@media(max-width: 64rem){{max-width:lc(100vw - (1rem * 2));marg-left:1rem;marg-right:1rem;} .e152u5os0{width:100vw;marg-left:lc(-1 * 1rem);}}@media(m-width: 48rem) and (max-width: 61.25rem){{marg-left:to;marg-right:to;} 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48rem){{marg-left:-50vw;marg-right:-50vw;width:100vw;left:50%;right:50%;}}</style><div class="ntent-lead css-trzem2 ewisyje6"><style data-emotn="css 1ui7hop">{marg-bottom:0.9375rem;--aspect-rat:56.25%;}</style><div class="__rp-ntaer css-1ui7hop e6l0f0"><style data-emotn="css 1jlky5r">{height:100%;marg-bottom:0.9375rem;paddg-left:1rem;paddg-right:1rem;width:100vw;}@media(max-width: 48rem){{marg-left:0rem;}}@media(m-width: 40.625rem){{width:100%;}}@media(m-width: 40.625rem) and (max-width: 61.25rem){{marg-left:0rem;}}@media(m-width: 61.25rem){{marg-left:0rem;paddg-left:lc(-1 * 1rem);paddg-right:lc(-1 * 1rem);}} .__rp-ntaer{height:to;}</style><div data-embed="embed-vio" class="vio-player css-1jlky5r e1ou1fny0"><style data-emotn="css 1uds6oo">{height:100%;width:100%;posn:relative;}</style><div class="css-1uds6oo e1f7ylgd6"><style data-emotn="css 1iiivv4">{background-lor:rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.4);borr:.1875rem solid whe;borr-radi:50%;lor:#fff;cursor:poter;height:3.75rem;left:50%;posn:absolute;top:50%;-webk-transform:translate(-50%,-50%);-moz-transform:translate(-50%,-50%);-ms-transform:translate(-50%,-50%);transform:translate(-50%,-50%);-webk-transn:all 0.4s;transn:all 0.4s;width:3.75rem;z-x:1;}.e1f7ylgd6:hover {background-lor:rgba(33, 150, 245, 0.8);lor:#ffffff;}@media(m-width: 48rem){{height:5.625rem;width:5.625rem;borr:.28125rem solid whe;}}</style><button aria-label="Play Vio" class="css-1iiivv4 e1f7ylgd1"><style data-emotn="css 1lhf7lq">{fill:#ffffff;height:1.4rem;vertil-align:middle;width:1.45rem;}@media(m-width: 48rem){{width:2.3125rem;height:3rem;}}</style><svg xmlns=" width="24" height="24" viewBox="0 0 24 24" style="fill: var(--primary, #000);" role="img" tle="Play" class="css-1lhf7lq e1f7ylgd2"><tle>play in</tle><sc>The triangle in that dit to play</sc><path d="M22 12 7 20.66V3.34L22 12Z"></path></svg></button><style data-emotn="css 157wciq">{width:100%;height:100%;object-f:ver;cursor:poter;}</style><style data-emotn="css g939jb">{width:100%;height:100%;object-f:ver;cursor:poter;}</style><img fetchPrry="high" alt="preview for Is Virgy Even a Real Thg? | Seggs Ed wh Hayl | Seventeen" tle="Vio player poster image" width="2000" height="1000" dg="async" data-nimg="1" style="lor: transparent; width: 100%; height: to;" siz="100vw" srcSet=" 640w, 980w, 1120w, 1200w, 1920w" src="" class="e1f7ylgd5 css-g939jb exi4f7p0" /></div></div></div></div><style data-emotn="css woto36">{font-fay:Charter,Geia,Tim,Serif;font-size:1.1875rem;le-height:1.6;paddg-left:0rem;paddg-right:0rem;posn:relative;}@media(m-width: 48rem){{paddg-left:3.5rem;paddg-right:3.5rem;}}@media(m-width: 48rem) and (max-width: 61.25rem){{max-width:45.25rem;marg-left:to;marg-right:to;}}@media(m-width: 61.25rem){{paddg-left:0rem;paddg-right:0rem;}}@media(m-width: 73.75rem) and (max-width: 100rem){{paddg-left:0rem;paddg-right:0rem;}}@media(m-width: 90rem){{paddg-left:0rem;paddg-right:0rem;}} em{font-style:alic;font-fay:Charter,Geia,Tim,Serif;} strong{font-fay:Charter,Geia,Tim,Serif;font-weight:bold;}{clear:both;ntent:" ";display:block;font-size:0.7rem;le-height:1.5rem;height:0rem;visibily:hidn;}</style><div class="article-body-ntent article-body standard-body-ntent css-woto36 ewisyje7"><style data-emotn="css aeyldl">{font-fay:Charter,Geia,Tim,Serif;font-size:1.1875rem;le-height:1.6;} strong{font-fay:Charter,Geia,Tim,Serif;font-weight:bold;} em{font-style:alic;font-fay:Charter,Geia,Tim,Serif;}</style><p data-no-id="0" class="css-aeyldl et3p2gv0">"Am I gay?" It sounds like such a simple qutn, but fdg the answer n be so much trickier than you might thk. Why? Bee 's a qutn only you n answer. You n't ask a teacher or a parent or your bt iend or Google or even Seventeen and get a "y" or a "no." And while would be so nice to shake a magic 8 ball and get some clary here, 's actually ccial for you to e to the answer all on your own.</p><p data-no-id="1" class="css-aeyldl et3p2gv0">Here are some thgs to keep md if you're thkg you might be gay:</p><style data-emotn="css 10bmbge">{font-fay:GTWalsheim,Helveti,sans-serif;font-weight:normal;marg-bottom:0.625rem;marg-top:0.625rem;}@media(max-width: 48rem){{font-size:1.625rem;le-height:1.1;}}@media(m-width: 48rem){{font-size:1.75rem;le-height:1.1;}}@media(m-width: 64rem){{font-size:1.875rem;le-height:1.1;}} b, strong{font-fay:her;font-weight:bold;} em, i{font-fay:her;font-style:alic;}</style><h2 data-no-id="2" class="body-h4 css-10bmbge et3p2gv0">You're not alone.</h2><p data-no-id="3" class="css-aeyldl et3p2gv0">If you're thkg that you might be gay, then know that you have a whole built- support group of wonrful and diverse people who are jt wag to meet you. What's tly betiful about beg the LGBTQ muny is that is so expansive. It clus people of every race and relign. Your body n be any size and you n be gay. You n be disabled and be gay. Everyone is wele to the table, and you're bound to meet some pretty credible humans once you take a seat.</p><h2 data-no-id="5" class="body-h4 css-10bmbge et3p2gv0">It's ok if you don't have answers.</h2><p data-no-id="6" class="css-aeyldl et3p2gv0">There's a huge leap om "I feel a ltle different" to "I'm a mascule-of-center genrqueer gay woman." I remember kissg girls high school, and then llege, but havg boyiends along the way. I kept wag to be h by some bolt of lighteng that would show me that I was unniably, 100%, totally, purely gay. But, tbh, the procs was a lot quieter than that. I kissed girls and I liked , but I still liked guys. And then I actually dated a girl, and I realized that felt the same as datg a guy but better. And then I thought, 'Huh. I mt be gay.' Jt like that. </p><div supprsHydratnWarng data-no-id="7" data-embed="edorial-lk" class="embed css-0 e9hzx6g0"><style data-emotn="css qsosw3">{borr:th solid #CDCDCD;marg-top:1.875rem;marg-bottom:1.875rem;paddg:1.25rem;}</style><asi class="css-qsosw3 e6pr2lz5"><style data-emotn="css 1q3cish">{display:block;font-weight:bold;marg:0rem;font-fay:GTWalsheim,Helveti,sans-serif;font-size:0.875rem;le-height:1.2;letter-spacg:0.05rem;text-transform:upperse;}</style><h6 class="css-1q3cish e6pr2lz3"><span aria-hidn="te" class="css-0 eagam8p0"></span><style data-emotn="css 8lle59">{max-width:lc(100% - 120px - .625rem);}</style><span class="css-8lle59 e6pr2lz1">Related Story</span><span aria-hidn="te" class="css-0 eagam8p1"></span></h6><style data-emotn="css c4s2gi">{paddg:0rem;marg:0rem;list-style:none;}</style><ul class="css-c4s2gi e6pr2lz4"><style data-emotn="css 1uquqpo">{borr-bottom:none;lor:#000000;font-fay:GTWalsheim,Helveti,sans-serif;font-weight:bold;marg-bottom:0.3125rem;paddg-top:0.9375rem;}@media(max-width: 48rem){{font-size:1.125rem;le-height:1.3;}}@media(m-width: 40.625rem){{font-size:1rem;le-height:1.3;}}@media(m-width: 64rem){{font-size:1.125rem;le-height:1.3;}} a{-webk-text-ratn:none;text-ratn:none;lor:her;-webk-transn:all 0.3s ease--out;transn:all 0.3s ease--out;} a:hover{lor:#595959;}</style><li class="css-1uquqpo e6pr2lz2"><style data-emotn="css 1bn7a5e">{-webk-text-ratn:none;text-ratn:none;display:-webk-box;display:-webk-flex;display:-ms-flexbox;display:flex;-webk-box-flex-wrap:wrap;-webk-flex-wrap:wrap;-ms-flex-wrap:wrap;flex-wrap:wrap;-webk-flex-directn:row;-ms-flex-directn:row;flex-directn:row;-webk-box-pack:start;-ms-flex-pack:start;-webk-jtify-ntent:flex-start;jtify-ntent:flex-start;-webk-align-ems:center;-webk-box-align:center;-ms-flex-align:center;align-ems:center;}</style><a href="/celebry/g27228640/bisexual-celebri/" data-vars-ga-ll-to-actn="29 Celebri Who Have Come Out as Bisexual" data-vars-ga-ux-element="Edorial Lks" data-vars-ga-outbound-lk=" class="css-1bn7a5e e1c1bym14"><span aria-hidn="te" class="css-0 eagam8p0"></span><style data-emotn="css 1l0u1">{marg-right:0.625rem;height:to;}</style><img src="" alt="bisexual celebri" tle="29 Celebri Who Have Come Out as Bisexual" width="120" height="100%" dg="async" loadg="lazy" image-align="left" class="css-1l0u1 e6pr2lz0" /><span class="css-8lle59 e6pr2lz1">29 Celebri Who Have Come Out as Bisexual</span><span aria-hidn="te" class="css-0 eagam8p1"></span></a></li></ul></asi></div><p data-no-id="8" class="css-aeyldl et3p2gv0">And you know what? The world didn't end and I didn't feel like a totally different person — I jt felt like I had taken a small step towards who I tly am si. And that feels good. And ever sce that day, there have been a ln more steps as I've acquired more language to scribe myself and my inty. As long as you're listeng to yourself, you n't go wrong.</p><h2 data-no-id="9" class="body-h4 css-10bmbge et3p2gv0">Your feelgs might change, and they might not.</h2><p data-no-id="10" class="css-aeyldl et3p2gv0">Comg out for the first time n feel so fal, but 's actually not the end ('s jt the begng!). You're gog to e out so much the urse of your life ( llege, on dat, when you meet new people, etc.), and each time you do, you get to fe where you are wh your inty that moment.</p><div supprsHydratnWarng data-no-id="11" data-embed="edorial-lk" class="embed css-0 e9hzx6g0"><asi class="css-qsosw3 e6pr2lz5"><h6 class="css-1q3cish e6pr2lz3"><span aria-hidn="te" class="css-0 eagam8p0"></span><span class="css-8lle59 e6pr2lz1">Related Story</span><span aria-hidn="te" class="css-0 eagam8p1"></span></h6><ul class="css-c4s2gi e6pr2lz4"><li class="css-1uquqpo e6pr2lz2"><a href="/life/g32577915/lgbtq-pri-flags/" data-vars-ga-ll-to-actn="Celebrate Pri Month Wh 21 LGBTQ+ Pri Flags" data-vars-ga-ux-element="Edorial Lks" data-vars-ga-outbound-lk=" class="css-1bn7a5e e1c1bym14"><span aria-hidn="te" class="css-0 eagam8p0"></span><img src="" alt="pri flags" tle="Celebrate Pri Month Wh 21 LGBTQ+ Pri Flags" width="120" height="100%" dg="async" loadg="lazy" image-align="left" class="css-1l0u1 e6pr2lz0" /><span class="css-8lle59 e6pr2lz1">Celebrate Pri Month Wh 21 LGBTQ+ Pri Flags</span><span aria-hidn="te" class="css-0 eagam8p1"></span></a></li></ul></asi></div><p data-no-id="12" class="css-aeyldl et3p2gv0">And, while we're on the topic, cut yourself a ltle slack the g out partment, ok? Can you image if every feelg you had at the age of 12 beme somethg that was set stone? If that were te, you'd be a vet wh a purple race r and a bet full of Sour Patch kids wonrg how you got to this pot your life. Thgs change and evolve as you grow, and that's 100% ok. What your sexual orientatn or genr inty feels like today might not be how will feel 1 year or 10 years. Don't punish yourself for dog the legwork to figure out who you are.</p><h2 data-no-id="13" class="body-h4 css-10bmbge et3p2gv0">Your safety first.</h2><p data-no-id="14" class="css-aeyldl et3p2gv0">Your safety means everythg, and sometim beg out might make you feel like a target. If 's ever unsafe for you to be out, take that to nsiratn. You're not beg unte to yourself if you are a suatn where self-prervatn is necsary. There will always be time to e out. If you feel unsafe, 's perfectly fe to wa out.</p><h2 data-no-id="15" class="body-h4 css-10bmbge et3p2gv0">Brg queer voic to your life.</h2><p data-no-id="16" class="css-aeyldl et3p2gv0">Comg out n feel very lonely at first. If you fd that you're not a posn to e out publicly and you feel isolated as a rult of that, try to rporate queer voic to your private life. For example, listen to podsts like <style data-emotn="css lec2h6">{-webk-text-ratn:unrle;text-ratn:unrle;text-ratn-thickns:0.0625rem;text-ratn-lor:her;text-unrle-offset:0.25rem;lor:her;-webk-transn:all 0.3s ease--out;transn:all 0.3s ease--out;background-image:lear-gradient( to bottom, rgba(241, 220, 225, 1), rgba(241, 220, 225, 1));-webk-background-posn:0 100%;background-posn:0 100%;background-repeat:repeat-x;-webk-background-size:0 0;background-size:0 0;paddg-top:0.05rem;paddg-bottom:0.05rem;}{lor:#000000;text-ratn-lor:borr-lk-body-hover;-webk-background-size:.625rem 3.125rem;background-size:.625rem 3.125rem;}</style><a href=" data-href=" target="_blank" data-vars-ga-outbound-lk=" data-vars-ga-ux-element="Hyperlk" data-vars-ga-ll-to-actn="Nancy" class="body-lk css-lec2h6 et3p2gv0">Nancy</a> and fd iendship credible hosts who provi sight to issu and ias that are important to you. Read a book that highlights a dimensnal queer narrative (you n fd a list of them <a href=" data-href=" target="_blank" data-vars-ga-outbound-lk=" data-vars-ga-ux-element="Hyperlk" data-vars-ga-ll-to-actn="here" class="body-lk css-lec2h6 et3p2gv0">here</a>) and bge-watch <a href=" data-href=" target="_blank" data-vars-ga-outbound-lk=" data-vars-ga-ux-element="Hyperlk" data-vars-ga-ll-to-actn="TV shows that feature pellg LGBTQ characters" class="body-lk css-lec2h6 et3p2gv0">TV shows that feature pellg LGBTQ characters</a>. Queer culture is a thg of bety. Dig to !</p><h2 data-no-id="17" class="body-h4 css-10bmbge et3p2gv0">Know where you n go to get support.</h2><p data-no-id="18" class="css-aeyldl et3p2gv0">You might be wonrg if you're gay, but you don't have anyone your life to turn to wh qutns and ncerns. Fret not, iend. There are so many credible rourc where you n fd support. For one, check out <a href=" data-href=" target="_blank" data-vars-ga-outbound-lk=" data-vars-ga-ux-element="Hyperlk" data-vars-ga-ll-to-actn="GLAAD" class="body-lk css-lec2h6 et3p2gv0">GLAAD</a>, the world’s largt LGBTQ media advocy anizatn, to fd out how you n get volved your muny. Also, take a look at their <a href=" data-href=" target="_blank" data-vars-ga-outbound-lk=" data-vars-ga-ux-element="Hyperlk" data-vars-ga-ll-to-actn="glossary of terms" class="body-lk css-lec2h6 et3p2gv0">glossary of terms</a>. As we all know, 's so hard to scribe what you're feelg when you don't have the language to pture . Read up on the difference between thgs like <a href=" data-href=" target="_blank" data-vars-ga-outbound-lk=" data-vars-ga-ux-element="Hyperlk" data-vars-ga-ll-to-actn="genr inty and sexual orientatn" class="body-lk css-lec2h6 et3p2gv0">genr inty and sexual orientatn</a> so you n get a better grasp of what's gog on your head and heart.</p><div supprsHydratnWarng data-no-id="19" data-embed="edorial-lk" class="embed css-0 e9hzx6g0"><asi class="css-qsosw3 e6pr2lz5"><h6 class="css-1q3cish e6pr2lz3"><span aria-hidn="te" class="css-0 eagam8p0"></span><span class="css-8lle59 e6pr2lz1">Related Story</span><span aria-hidn="te" class="css-0 eagam8p1"></span></h6><ul class="css-c4s2gi e6pr2lz4"><li class="css-1uquqpo e6pr2lz2"><a href="/life/a36557260/trans-nonbary-teens-genrol-kids-book-pri-2021/" data-vars-ga-ll-to-actn="What We Know About A Kids Book About x GenrCool " data-vars-ga-ux-element="Edorial Lks" data-vars-ga-outbound-lk=" class="css-1bn7a5e e1c1bym14"><span aria-hidn="te" class="css-0 eagam8p0"></span><img src="" alt="genrol bundle books a kids book about pri lgbtq clive transgenr nonbary" tle="What We Know About A Kids Book About x GenrCool " width="120" height="100%" dg="async" loadg="lazy" image-align="left" class="css-1l0u1 e6pr2lz0" /><span class="css-8lle59 e6pr2lz1">What We Know About A Kids Book About x GenrCool </span><span aria-hidn="te" class="css-0 eagam8p1"></span></a></li></ul></asi></div><p data-no-id="20" class="css-aeyldl et3p2gv0">Here are a few other anizatns where you n fd supportive muni and so much more:</p><style data-emotn="css 19p7hma">{font-fay:Charter,Geia,Tim,Serif;font-size:1.1875rem;le-height:1.6;marg:0.9375rem 0 0 0.625rem;paddg:0 0 0 1.25rem;}@media(m-width: 48rem){{marg:0.9375rem 0;}} b, strong{font-fay:her;font-weight:bold;} em{font-style:alic;font-fay:Charter,Geia,Tim,Serif;} em, i{font-fay:her;font-style:alic;} li{paddg-bottom:0.625rem;} strong{font-fay:Charter,Geia,Tim,Serif;font-weight:bold;} li::marker{lor:#323232;}</style><ul data-no-id="21" class="css-19p7hma et3p2gv0"><li><a href=" data-href=" target="_blank" data-vars-ga-outbound-lk=" data-vars-ga-ux-element="Hyperlk" data-vars-ga-ll-to-actn="The Trevor Project" class="body-lk css-lec2h6 et3p2gv0">The Trevor Project</a>: A natnal anizatn providg crisis terventn and suici preventn servic to lbian, gay, bisexual, transgenr and qutng (LGBTQ) young people ag 13-24.</li><li> <a href=" data-href=" target="_blank" data-vars-ga-outbound-lk=" data-vars-ga-ux-element="Hyperlk" data-vars-ga-ll-to-actn="It Gets Better Project" class="body-lk css-lec2h6 et3p2gv0">It Gets Better Project</a>: A nonprof anizatn wh a missn to uplift, empower, and nnect lbian, gay, bisexual, transgenr, and queer youth around the globe.</li><li><a href=" data-href=" target="_blank" data-vars-ga-outbound-lk=" data-vars-ga-ux-element="Hyperlk" data-vars-ga-ll-to-actn="Trans Lifele" class="body-lk css-lec2h6 et3p2gv0">Trans Lifele</a>: A non-prof dited to the well beg of transgenr people.</li></ul><p data-no-id="22" class="css-aeyldl et3p2gv0">Want to learn more about g out? Watch this vio below and follow Seventeen's LGBTQ-foced social channel <em>Here</em> on <a href=" data-href=" target="_blank" data-vars-ga-outbound-lk=" data-vars-ga-ux-element="Hyperlk" data-vars-ga-ll-to-actn="Facebook" class="body-lk css-lec2h6 et3p2gv0">Facebook</a> and <a href=" data-href=" target="_blank" data-vars-ga-outbound-lk=" data-vars-ga-ux-element="Hyperlk" data-vars-ga-ll-to-actn="Instagram" class="body-lk css-lec2h6 et3p2gv0">Instagram</a>.</p><style data-emotn="css 1v2eakg">{marg-bottom:0.9375rem;posn:relative;}{marg-left:to;marg-right:to;width:100%;}@media(m-width: 48rem){{width:90%;}}{marg-left:to;marg-right:to;width:95%;}@media(m-width: 30rem){{width:75%;}}@media(m-width: 40.625rem){{width:65%;}}</style><div data-no-id="23" data-teractive="VioPlayer-1" class="embed aspect-rat-16x9 css-1v2eakg e3dq3y0"><div class="__rp-ntaer css-1ui7hop e6l0f0"><style data-emotn="css 1yu8e3d">{marg-bottom:0.9375rem;width:100%;height:100%;} .__rp-ntaer{height:to;}</style><div data-embed="embed-vio" class="vio-player css-1yu8e3d e1ou1fny0"><div class="css-1uds6oo e1f7ylgd6"><button aria-label="Play Vio" class="css-1iiivv4 e1f7ylgd1"><svg xmlns=" width="24" height="24" viewBox="0 0 24 24" style="fill: var(--primary, #000);" role="img" tle="Play" class="css-1lhf7lq e1f7ylgd2"><tle>play in .

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