Is It Possible to Pray the Gay Away? | Psychology Today

Contents:

• IS IT POSSIBLE TO PRAY THE GAY AWAY?
• NETFLIX'S 'PRAY AWAY' LOOKS BEHD THE CURTA OF THE 'EX-GAY' MOVEMENT
• 5 THGS I LEARNED AT A 'PRAY AWAY THE GAY' CAMP
• ‘PRAY AWAY THE GAY’ HAS GONE AWAY. WHY ARE GOVERNMENTS TRYG TO STOP IT?
• CAN WE PRAY THE GAY AWAY?
• PRAYG THE GAY AWAY, ONE AWAY MSAGE AT A TIME
• FORMER 'EX-GAY' LEARS DENOUNCE 'CONVERSN THERAPY' IN A NEW DOCUMENTARY
• ‘PRAY AWAY’ REVIEW: ATONG FOR AN ANTI-GAY STANCE

IS IT POSSIBLE TO PRAY THE GAY AWAY?

The revelatns surroundg Marc Bachmann's psychotherapy practice along wh his statements equatg gay people to barbarians reflect the eply held view among too many people that homosexualy is a psychologil or moral choice that n be altered and ed should be. As someone who profs to help gays and lbians bee "straight, " Dr.

There are several nservative relig anizatns, like Exod Internatnal and Homosexuals Anonymo, that claim to have helped people change their sexual orientatn through prayer, unselg, or a batn of both. Moreover, there are licensed mental health profsnals who practice what are lled reparative or nversn therapi signed to make gay people heterosexual. The bt-known group of such clicians is the Natnal Associatn for Rearch and Therapy of Homosexualy (NARTH), led by psychologist Joseph Nilosi.

He and his followers claim that gays and lbians suffer om a damagg blend of childhood trma, shamg their fai of orig, and chronic unmet needs for love and affectn om their same-sex parents. Reparative therapy supposedly helps gay clients bee heterosexual by workg wh them to amelrate toxic feelgs stemmg om their damaged childhoods. Robert Spzer, a proment psychiatrist who, oddly enough, led the charge to remove homosexualy as a disease om the Diagnostic and Statistil Manual, had unrtaken rearch wh 200 women and men who unrwent reparative therapy and believed themselv to be "cured" of homosexualy, as evinced by their abily to engage sexual relatns wh the oppose sex, marry heterosexually, and nceive children.

NETFLIX'S 'PRAY AWAY' LOOKS BEHD THE CURTA OF THE 'EX-GAY' MOVEMENT

In fact, there are many reports of people unrgog treatments offered by ex-gay mistri who not only return to homosexualy but have also been trmatized by this so-lled therapy. The real diseas are homophobia and heterosexism, not homosexualy.

5 THGS I LEARNED AT A 'PRAY AWAY THE GAY' CAMP

It is important to regnize that the great majory of psychotherapy profsnals argue vociferoly that such "treatment" is uhil bee homosexualy is not an illns — rather the "illns" is our tolerance of sexual and genr behavrs fallg outsi rtrictive societal norms. I also tell clients that reparative and nversn therapi, bis beg effective, are psychologilly harmful to gays and lbians, which is another reason I do not remend them and will not assist clients procurg such treatment.

People like Marc and Michele Bachmann believe that acceptg and even celebratg gay and lbian people will evably lead to the moral cle of our society. When Amerin documentarian Kriste Stolakis set out to make her but feature film, she knew she wanted to she a light on the “ex-gay” movement, which nsists of those that believe a person’s genr inty or sexual orientatn n be changed.

Really is a movement of hurt people hurtg other people, of what ternalized homophobia and transphobia looks like when is wield outward. Shot before the Covid-19 panmic, the film chronicl the rise — and subsequent fall — of Exod Internatnal, a nversn therapy anizatn that, acrdg to the team behd the the film, began as a Bible study group the 1970s nsistg of five evangelil men who were lookg to help one another leave the “homosexual liftyle.

‘PRAY AWAY THE GAY’ HAS GONE AWAY. WHY ARE GOVERNMENTS TRYG TO STOP IT?

But years after risg to stardom the relig right, many of the “ex-gay” lears, whose own same-sex attractns never went away, have sce e out as LGBTQ and disavowed the very movement that they helped to grow.

Stolakis’ list of terviewe “Pray Away” clus Randy Thomas, the fal vice print of Exod Internatnal; Yvette Cantu Schneir, the former head of Exod’ women’s mistri; and John Plk, one of the most bt-known “ex-gay” people the world.

“Somethg my team and I talked about a lot makg this film is, this really is a movement of hurt people hurtg other people, of what ternalized homophobia and transphobia looks like when is wield outward, ” said Stolakis, whose other directorial creds clu “The Typist” and “Where We Stand. ”While many former lears have renounced and spoken out agast the “pray the gay away” movement, Stolakis said “the larger culture of homophobia and transphobia, ” particularly relig muni, has allowed the movement to ntue wh younger lears, even wh the dissolutn of Exod Internatnal 2013 and the legalizatn of same-sex marriage the U. Alone, nearly 700, 000 lbian, gay, bisexual and transgenr adults have been subjected to some form of nversn therapy durg their lifetime, acrdg to a 2019 report om the Williams Instute at the UCLA School of Law.

CAN WE PRAY THE GAY AWAY?

”Wh “Pray Away” set to but more than 190 untri on Netflix this week, Stolakis wants to make one thg clear to every prospective viewer: The “ex-gay” movement was never led by jt “a uple of bad appl. ”“As long as that larger culture of homophobia and transphobia exists — be our church, any relig muny, our polil sphere or our culture — some versn of nversn therapy and the ex-LGBTQ movement will ntue, ” she explaed. "Wh my first weeks therapy, I was told every other gay person on Earth had been executed....

By the end of the so-lled 'treatments, ' I believed the ernment was lookg for me bee the gays had brought AIDS to Ameri and that I now had this disease ragg through me.

" That is, they assumed that bee he was gay, 's bee his ntrollg mother and adbeat dad had nfed and irreparably trmatized his genals. In fact, they uldn't fd any trma to blame Sam's homosexualy on at all.

PRAYG THE GAY AWAY, ONE AWAY MSAGE AT A TIME

4 They Physilly Torture You For Beg Gay.

Later ssns would clu pper heatg ils, needl my fgers, and electric shocks, " all while Sam was shown gay porn. Antos777/iStock/Getty Imag Of urse, no one explaed why they had a stockpile of gay porn on hand.

Obvly, spe the old sayg, you n't "heatg-il the gay away. In fact, he got so ed to reprsg his te self that, even after he me out, he wasn't entirely sure how to be: When he got to llege and first enuntered the gay muny, he immediately "me out a ball of glter. " He embraced a sparkly, Freddy Mercury-stage-show-liftyle bee he saw a bunch of out-and-proud homosexuals and thought that was how was done.

FORMER 'EX-GAY' LEARS DENOUNCE 'CONVERSN THERAPY' IN A NEW DOCUMENTARY

"I'm very flamboyant, and that's partly bee of how I was troduced to the ia of other gay men existg.... I found out what a gay person looked like, and realized that was how I was supposed to act. 2 There's A Reason Some Gays Are So "Flamboyant".

Go to a hardware store on the day of the gay pri para and you might hear an old du wh a beer gut lament, "Why do them gays have to be so flamboyant? The vast majory of homosexuals are -- shocker -- jt people.

‘PRAY AWAY’ REVIEW: ATONG FOR AN ANTI-GAY STANCE

But if you see somebody sportg an outlandish stume, 's not about makg homosexualy look fun to help "turn kids gay" (if Sam's gayns uld survive electroshock torture, then we're pretty sure another kid's straightns n survive a few paras and some sequ boas); 's about showg closeted gay kids that homosexualy isn't tomatilly a lifetime of misery. 1 Both Fah And Homosexualy Can Be Equally Intolerant.