Why ‘Masc4Masc’ Isn't Necsarily Self-Hatg And Anti-Gay | HuffPost Voic

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When you’re a closeted gay boy, masculy performance is one of the tools you e to survive. For those who are unwillg or unable to mata a fa, straight boys seize upon your feme… * masc4masc gays *

What’s wh gay men seekg “mascule only” partners? When you’re a closeted gay boy, masculy performance is one of the tools you e to survive.

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Illtratn by Kurt McRobertBut what they don’t tell you is that once you’re out of the closet, you’re out of the yg pan and to the fire, honey—bee many gay men have the same hang-ups about masculy as those speful boys om middle school. The performance of masculy dictat how some gay men munite on gay hookup and datg apps: those who intify as “masc, ” those who specifilly seek out “MASC ONLY (no femme!!

WHY ‘MASC4MASC’ ISN'T NECSARILY SELF-HATG AND ANTI-GAY

Anissue of ternalized homophobia that is affectg gay datg apps: Masc4Masc has ed many to feel like exprsg themselv a feme is wrong. * masc4masc gays *

” — Alex, 32To get to the—ahem—bottom of this, I browsed gay hookup apps lookg for guys who intify as or are lookg for “mascule” men and asked what masculy means to them. If we take tradnal masculy, heavily reliant on the social nventns of straight dus, then they’re lookg for someone “straight actg” — and yet spe some adult films I’ve seen, I’m not sure that fuckg other guys is somethg that hypermascule straight guys do very of the fns of masculy center on what straight guys “should” be like, and therefore how the ial gay guy “should” act: “speakg a ep voice, ” “playg and watchg sports like football and basketball, ” and “beer drkg” were all mentned.

Beg raised an environment where masculy meant survival n certaly ndn a man to value more than others who were raised a way that enuraged all typ of behavrs om a young age, gay men who are more effemate are ndned to nform to masculy as a means of survival.

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Someone who lls masc guys “real men” assum gay men should be mutually mascule partnerships—attracted to the mascule. Hell—the tomatic reactn to, “I didn’t even realize you’re gay!

SEXISM IN THE GAY COMMUNY

Refers to gay and bisexual men who are naturally mascule and are attracted to other mascule mal. They do not f the stereotyp of femy or mp forced on all gay and sometim bisexual men. This preference partners and liftyle a lot of toxic behavur and tolerance towards mascule dividuals om those maly that do f the stereotyp. Those that shout for tolerance are actually the most tolerant the gay muny, as this terference eedom to choose partners shows." name="Dcriptn" property="og:scriptn * masc4masc gays *

Some gay men are fightg back. Scff has taken steps to create a more clive environment for all typ of gay men to fd partners wh whom they click. Gay men are showg their disda for “masc only” rhetoric through humor, puttg l like, “YES fats, YES femm!

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”Most gay men are hyper self-aware of their genred behavr, and have a pretty good ia of how mascule or feme they nsir themselv to be. It was difficult enough g to terms wh the fact that I’m gay to beg wh, and I jt got over the fact that I’ve aged out of my prime twk years—no longer ftg neatly to any of the checkable tegori on Grdr or Scff. LOG IN WITH FACEBOOKHome›Relatnships›Masc4Masc: A Toxic Culture›Open any gay datg app right now, and you are gog to be greeted wh profil of men whose ernam, tagl, and scriptns clu the dread "Masc4Masc" phrase.

For those of you who are not faiar wh Masc4Masc, or mascule for mascule, is an intifier that dit a gay dividual who nforms to a heteronormative ia of masculy and is searchg for the same. This iology has ed men who are feme to feel unwanted bee of who they are, and has ed those who were raised a more mascule environment to feel like explorg femy is not an there is nothg wrong wh beg mascule as a gay man, there is an issue wh beg mascule and viewg those who are not as lser.

Why is actg straight such a sirable thg when you're gay, and why is beg gay thought of as jt beg feme? Sayg you're "straight actg" is no more than a nasty way of sayg I don't want to be associated wh beg gay, even though I am. Jt make sure you're not dog out of a place of ternalized homophobia or ternalized misogyny.

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F's son returns when his fiancé is btally asslted by a street gang which prov to be the latt crime a seri of hate crim agast gay men. While workg a se wh Benson volvg the murr of two gay men at a circ party, F learns that his son Ken is gay and has difficulty acceptg .

Like masc4masc gays are ashamed or they hate fem guys and to the pot now where a gay meme page I follow is like always remember masc gays haven’t done anythg for gay rights. Wh fewer and fewer gay men feelg fortable intifyg as eher “masc” or “fem, ” the general nsens the days seems to be that the whole “masc4masc” thg is an outdated exprsn om the gay hookup culture of yterday.

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