Miatas are gay, I have proof! | Page 2 | Mazdas247

Contents:

• IS THE MAZDA MIATA A GAY R?
• I'M NOT GAY, I JT LOVE MIATAS.I'M NOT GAY, I JT LOVE MIATAS.
• I’M NOT GAY I JT LOVE MIATAS SHIRT
• I’M NOT GAY I JT LOVE MIATAS APPAREL SHIRT
• IM NOT GAY I JT LOVE MIATA
• IM NOT GAY I JT LOVE MIATA STICKERS
• IM NOT GAY I JT LOVE MY MIATA PS
• I’M NOT GAY I JT LOVE MIATAS LGBT RABOW LBIAN PRI PULLOVER HOODIE
• GALAXY S9 I’M NOT GAY I JT LOVE MIATAS SPORTS CAR APPAREL CASE
• I’M NOT GAY I JT LOVE MIATAS APPAREL SHIRT
• I’M NOT GAY I JT LOVE MIATA SHIRT
• IM NOT GAY I JT LOVE MIATA SWEATSHIRTS & HOODI
• MIATAS ARE GAY, I HAVE PROOF!
• I’M NOT GAY I JT LOVE MIATAS SPORTS CAR APPAREL PULLOVER HOODIE
• I M NOT GAY I JT LOVE MY MIATA
• I’M NOT GAY I JT LOVE MIATAS SHIRT
• FIVE GAY CARS FOR THE ENOMIC APOLYPSEBY BRETT BERKOCTOBER 2, 2008SAVE THIS STORYSAVESAVE THIS STORYSAVEWH THE ARRIVAL OF THE FULL-ON ENOMIC MELTDOWN, EVERYONE NEEDS TO SLE BACK, EVEN THE GAYS. BUT CUTTG RNERS DON'T MEAN YOU N'T REMA CHIC. HERE ARE FIVE EXTREMELY ED—BUT STILL PELLG—RS YOU N EFULLY UTILIZE THE HARD TIM TO E, ONE FOR EACH OF THE RE HOMOSEXUAL (VEHICULAR) BODY-TYP.1) WAGON: 1979-1985 MERCES 300TDTHOUGH THE BENZ BOYS HAVE MA OTHER TOURG VEHICL THE HUNDRED OR SO YEARS SCE THEY VENTED THE TOMOBILE, THIS ONE IS THE CLASSIC. IT'S GAY AN UNRSTATED, BUT SOLIDLY TASTEFUL KD OF WAY: SUAL, SLOW, LILTG, BUT OH SO ELEGANT, LIKE YOUR RATOR, OR BILL BLASS. ON THE FISL DOOM SI, THE 300TD IS POWERED BY THE VENERABLE MERCES 5 CYLR DIEL, OFTEN REFERRED TO AS THE MOST DURABLE ENGE EVER CREATED—REGULARLY NNG FOR OVER A HALF-LN —SO THERE'LL BE NONE OF THOSE TROUBLG REPAIR BILLS (AT LEAST ON THIS PONENT). IN ADDN, YOU N EASILY GET THIS POWERPLANT NVERTED TO N ON ED RTRANT GREASE, AND YOU KNOW THAT A DOWN-TURNED AMERIN ENOMY, THERE'S GOG TO BE PLENTY OF CHEAP IED FOOD BEG NSUMED, SO YOU'RE GUARANTEED A STEADY SUPPLY OF FUEL. FALLY, THE REAR SEAT FOLDS DOWN, CREATG A RELATIVELY LARGE SPACE WHERE YOU (AND YOUR DOG, AND MAYBE ONE SMALL IEND) N LIVE.2) CONVERTIBLE: 1989-1997 MAZDA MIATATHE PUNCH LE TO EVERY STRAIGHT A-HOLE'S JOKE ABOUT WHAT A GAY R LOOKS LIKE, MAZDA'S MORN TAKE ON THE BRISH ROADSTERS OF THE 60'S AND 70'S IS, TTH, GAY AS HELL. I PERSONALLY WOULDN'T BE UGHT AD DRIVG ONE PUBLIC FOR FEAR OF HAVG EGGS THROWN AT MY FACE, BUT THE NUMERO PRIVATE TIM I'VE DRIVEN MY IENDS' MIATAS I'VE FOUND THEM FIENDISHLY FUN (AND SO CUTE, I JT WANT TO GAY MARRY THEM). THE FIRST-GENERATN RS ARE TNIER THE CURRENT MOL, SOMEWHAT UNRPOWERED, AND OFTEN A B BEAT UP, BUT TH GREAT DEPRSN-STYLE CHEAP. AND THEY'RE JAPANE-LEVEL RELIABLE, AS LONG AS YOU TAKE RE OF THEM (AND DON'T GET THEM STOLEN BY JOYRIDG TEENS AND FLIPPED TO A OZEN LAKE, WHICH ACTUALLY HAPPENED TO ONE OF MY PALS). OKAY, THEY HAVE ONLY TWO SEATS, MAKG THEM NOT EXACTLY FAY-IENDLY, BUT NOW THAT OUR ENOMY'S SPIRALG DOWN THE SHTER, YOU'RE GOG TO NEED TO CUT THAT SURROGATE LOOSE ANYWAY, THIRD TRIMTER OR NOT.MOST POPULARAND JT LIKE THAT: MICHAEL PATRICK KG KNOWS WHEN THE AUDIENCE TURNED ON CHE DIAZBY CHRIS MURPHYMARJORIE TAYLOR GREENE: IMPEACH BIN NOW OR I'LL SHUT DOWN THE GOVERNMENTBY ERIC LUTZKYLE DCHANEL, THE ROTHSCHILD WHO WASN’TBY NATE FREEMAN3) SUV: 1981-1991 ISUZU TROOPEREVERYONE KNOWS A FAG WHO'S BOUGHT (OR LTED AFTER) A VTAGE LAND ROVER. THEY REPRENT A GAY FANTASY OF SOME MID-CENTURY, GRAHAM GREENE, CLOSET-SE, AMBASSADORIAL LIFTYLE, WH LOTS OF SLIM SUS, AFTERNOON CKTAIL PARTI, AND CUTE NATIVE POOL BOYS. BUT WHILE THE LAND ROVERS ARE DURABLE ENOUGH TO TREK ACROSS AIN SERTS, OR BE ED AS THE LEAD VEHICLE A TRIBAL WARLORD PARA, THEY'RE BY NECSY HEAVY AND OVERBUILT, RENRG THEM EFFICIENT FOR OUR UGAL TIM. FORTUNATELY, I'VE FOUND A VIABLE SUBSTUTE. BUILT BIG AND UPRIGHT LIKE A CLASSIC BRISH SAFARI VEHICLE, BUT WH A TY UNRPOWERED FOUR-CYLR ENGE AND A WHG MANUAL TRANSMISSN, THIS IS THE FIRST GENERATN ISUZU TROOPER. MORE A POOR-MAN'S TOYOTA LAND CISER THAN A BUDGET LAND ROVER, THE TROOPER LIV UP TO S NAME,(AS LONG AS YOU DON'T LET TOUCH ROAD SALT; IF YOU DO, START UNTG BACKWARDS OM ONE AND WATCH DISSOLVE). ON THE BIG-TIME PL SI, WAS ONE OF THE FEW VEHICL EVER TO E EQUIPPED WH AN ALTIMETER—THAT'S A VICE THAT TELLS YOU HOW HIGH YOU ARE ABOVE SEA LEVEL—A FEATURE WHICH WILL E PECIALLY HANDY DURG THE NEXT IMPENDG GLOBAL TASTROPHIC EVENT: RISG TIS.MOST POPULARAND JT LIKE THAT: MICHAEL PATRICK KG KNOWS WHEN THE AUDIENCE TURNED ON CHE DIAZBY CHRIS MURPHYMARJORIE TAYLOR GREENE: IMPEACH BIN NOW OR I'LL SHUT DOWN THE GOVERNMENTBY ERIC LUTZKYLE DCHANEL, THE ROTHSCHILD WHO WASN’TBY NATE FREEMAN4) TCK: 1981-1985 VOLKSWAGEN RABB DIEL PICKUPYOU OWN A GAY LANDSPG BS, SO YOU CLAIM THAT YOU NEED A BIG TCK. BUT HOW MUCH (AHEM) EQUIPMENT ARE YOU ACTUALLY PACKG? A MOWER, A WEED-WHACKER, SOME CLIPPERS, A FEW HAND TOOLS, A BLOWER, AND TWO OR THREE PAIRS OF NAIL SCISSORS? WELL, 'S CNCH-TIME, SISTER. TIME TO TAKE THE LOSS ON YOUR RAM HEMI. FORTUNATELY, THE ENOMY'S LLAPSE CIS WH THE END OF GRASS-GROWG SEASON, SO THE ONLY THG YOU NEED TO CUT IS YOUR FUEL BILL. THANKFULLY, YOU N PICK UP ONE OF THE FOR ABOUT WHAT ALERS WILL BE OFFERG YOU FOR YOUR GAS-SWILLG, YEAR-OLD QUAD-CAB: A VOLKSWAGEN RABB DIEL PICKUP. THIS LTLE BABY IS ENOMY CLASS ALL THE WAY: HAS ONLY ENOUGH ROOM SI FOR YOU AND YOUR RRY-ONS, IS STRICTLY B.Y.O.E. (BRG YOUR OWN EVERYTHG), AND WILL S THREE ACROSS ONLY IF SOMEONE IS SI THE GUY THE CENTER POSN. BUT GETS ABOUT 45 M.P.G., LOOKS WEIRDLY STYLISH, AND HAS A FULLY FUNCTNAL RGO BED. I KNOW: 'S GERMAN. BUT, FORTUNATELY FOR THOSE OF YOU WHO DON'T LIKE TO GIVE YOUR PK DOLLARS TO THE VENTORS OF THE PK TRIANGLE, THIS PARTICULAR VEE-DUB WAS BUILT A DOMTIC PLANT PENNSYLVANIA. GET SOME BODY LORED PAT AND WHE-OUT THE V-O-L-K AND E-N ON THE TAILGATE, AND YOU HAVE THE GAYT TCK THE WORLD: THE BACK OF WILL READ S-W-A-G5) SEDAN: 1994-1997 HONDA ACRDVOTE FOR YOUR FAVORE DOW-DROPP' GAY CAR(POLLS)YOUR JOB'S BEEN ELIMATED, YOUR NDO'S BEEN FORECLOSED, AND YOUR ACURA HAS BEEN REPO-ED. YOUR BOYIEND LEFT YOU FOR SOMEONE WHO WOULDN'T DARE ASK HIM TO ENOMIZE BY SUBSTUTG SMIRNOFF FOR BELVERE. YOUR CLOST IENDS ARE RIDG THGS OUT AN OFF-THE-GRID MODULAR DOWN BELIZE. LEAVG YOU WH NOTHG BUT A SCHLE OF MOR SMETIC PROCR TO ANIZE YOUR DAYS. AND YOU HAVE TO GET TO THEM SOMEHOW (YOU'RE NOT GOG TO LET KASIA, G, AND D'REE DOWN THIS TIME OF CRISIS). SO, YOU BUY ONE OF THE: A LATE MOL HONDA ACRD. IT'S STILL GOT THE "CHET" OF BEG JAPANE. IT'S EFFICIENT AND PENDABLE. AND AS SOON AS YOU REPLACE THE PURPLE NEON WASHER NOZZL AND BOOM' FFEE N EXHST THAT THE KID YOU BOUGHT OM STALLED, WILL BE A VERY STEALTHY VEHICLE, EFUL FOR SLIPPG UNR THE GAYDAR OF THE WDOW-SMASHG NEO-FASCISTS WHO ARE SURE TO BE ON THE RISE ONCE THIS PRSN REALLY GETS SOME TRACTN, OR THE CHILDREN OF MEN-LIKE CROWDS OF ANGRY URBAN OUT HUNTG FOR SEEMGLY VALUABLE GAY PREY.BRETT BERK

IS THE MAZDA MIATA A GAY R?

Come out of your closet and get to Djtac' argued wh me when I told him Miatas were dubbed as gay rs. I'm not gay i jt love miatas ♪Now you swear and kick and beg That you're not a gambl' man Then you fd you're back Vegas Wh a handle your hand♪♪ Your black rds n make you money So you hi them when you're able In the land of sos and money You mt put them on the table♪♪ You go back Jack do aga roulette wheels tur' 'round and 'round♪♪ You go back Jack do aga♪♪. None of them were gay, to the bt of my knowledge, and neher am I.

I'M NOT GAY, I JT LOVE MIATAS.I'M NOT GAY, I JT LOVE MIATAS.

I later gave the '93 Miata to my son, who is not gay and is now married to a very cute girl. I suppose the F-150 may also be nsired a "gay" r some plac.

I’M NOT GAY I JT LOVE MIATAS SHIRT

It's not a gay r until the gays say is. Serly, I've never heard lled a gay r but I have heard lled a girl's r. Miata's aren't necsarily a homosexual 're actually que popular among the Autocross crowd.

I don't thk anyone here believ that if you own a Miata you are gay.

I’M NOT GAY I JT LOVE MIATAS APPAREL SHIRT

I thk at one pot the 1990's the gay muny found "fabulo" so got labeled.

IM NOT GAY I JT LOVE MIATA

I uld see the Miata beg a gay r, but 's not on the same level as cher or appletis.

IM NOT GAY I JT LOVE MIATA STICKERS

What's up wh all Miata owners beg gay? Hey, I liked Miatas for long time, but never really been the muny, so what's up wh wh the joke of Miata owners beg gay?

If you want to be on-trend, choose a nice I’m not gay I jt love miatas t-shirt and mix wh your accsori. Purchase onle I’m not gay I jt love miatas t-shirt, hoodie, ladi tee, sweater, …available. / 145 gsm fabric, solid lor t-shirts are 100% tton, heather grey t-shirts are 90% tton/10% polyter charal heather t-shirts are 52% tton/48% polyterThe third party prter of this product is evaluated acrdg to Internatnal Labor Organizatn standardsThe prter of this product sourc blanks om manufacturers mted to improvg tton farmg practic wh the Better Cotton IniativeI'm not gay I jt love MiatasI'm not gay I jt love my MiataAlso available onSiar DignsExplore siar signs om over 750, 000 pennt artists.

IM NOT GAY I JT LOVE MY MIATA PS

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StickerBy MagtigMiata is always the Answer StickerBy reanraMiata Is Always The Answer StickerBy VonarpMiata, Is, Always, The, Answer, Classic, T StickerBy VBFRTDMiata Is Always The Answer StickerBy kduck1026I'm not gay I jt love my Miata StickerBy omachi111Miata Is Always The Answer, Classic T, Trendg StickerBy JuSTORE1The Answer is Always MX5 StickerBy Daniel KozakewyczMiata is always the answer RETRO 8 B StickerBy reanraMiata is ALWAYS the answer StickerBy Cir1968Miata Is Always The Answer, Classic T, Trendg StickerBy JUSHDXKKMiata MX5 ND IV RED StickerBy CharlieCreatorMiata Is Always The Answer StickerBy pegricksMiata is ALWAYS the answer StickerBy Motocrossx23Miata Is Always The Answer - Miata Fan Dign T-Shirt StickerBy CalackxiOtaMiata Is Always The Answer, Classic, Nbsppremiumnbspteenbspshirtnbsphoodie, Good Ia StickerBy FreddieSTORE1Miata MX5 StickerBy aostman01Miata MX5 ND IV Black StickerBy CharlieCreatorMiata, Is, Always, The, Answer, Classic, Nbsppremiumnbsp, Nbsp, Nbsp, 2 StickerBy VBFRTDI'm not gay I jt love Miatas StickerBy Jem StudMiata Is Always The Answer! A StickerBy Lezzuall01Mazda MX-5 ND Roadster 30th Anniversary StickerBy JI-AutoDignMiata StickerBy BunnywoopThe Answer is Always MX5 (Dark) StickerBy Daniel KozakewyczMazda MX-5 30th anniversary - Miata is always the answer StickerBy JI-AutoDignI'm not gay I jt love my Mia_ta StickerBy Hekra88Miata is always the answer?

StickerIm Not Gay I Jt Love MiataQualy kiss-cut, vyl l, Im Not Gay I Jt Love Miata stickers. Galaxy S9 I’m Not Gay I Jt Love Miatas Sports Car Apparel Case: Cell Phon & Accsori. Galaxy S9 I’m Not Gay I Jt Love Miatas Sports Car Apparel Case.

I’M NOT GAY I JT LOVE MIATAS LGBT RABOW LBIAN PRI PULLOVER HOODIE

I’m not gay I jt love Miata shirt, hoodie, long sleeve… I like this shirt I’m not gay I jt love Miata, buy now! Damn guy sound more like a joke to me that an attack CALM DOWN young askg another man to teabag you is well, kd of Gay.

Miatas are gay bee you want to have sex wh them. Thats the gayt thg I've ever Can't have sex them fortably(way too small and tight), an n't have sex wh them(way to small and tight). ya know, I thk the whole sterotype of miatas beg a gay persons r should really end.

The gay populatn has bee so large, and has such fluence on the market (not jt rs, but the nsumer buyg market as a whole), that narrowg them down to jt miatas is ridiculo. We have reached a pot now where gay people are buyg any r they want and belive or not, they will like the same rs as you and I hetero r buyers! Gay people like ho....

GALAXY S9 I’M NOT GAY I JT LOVE MIATAS SPORTS CAR APPAREL CASE

Bee s not really about the r, s the persons hatred for gay people beg placed on the r, and that is a problem.

I’M NOT GAY I JT LOVE MIATAS APPAREL SHIRT

I didnt want to ll them gay, and stupid lookg was the first thg i thought. H2's are gay. People who thk Miatas are gay have never driven one on a twisty road.

"I n kiss guys and not be gay.

Lk Park is gay.

I’M NOT GAY I JT LOVE MIATA SHIRT

Jt bee he lik his fans and appreciat them dont mean that he is or the band is gay. Only ignorant people are gay.

IM NOT GAY I JT LOVE MIATA SWEATSHIRTS & HOODI

I’m Not Gay I Jt Love Miatas Sports Car Apparel Pullover Hoodie: Clothg, Sho & Jewelry.

MIATAS ARE GAY, I HAVE PROOF!

Wh the arrival of the full-on enomic meltdown, everyone needs to sle back, even the gays. Here are five extremely ed—but still pellg—rs you n efully utilize the hard tim to e, one for each of the re homosexual (vehicular) body-typ.

It's gay an unrstated, but solidly tasteful kd of way: sual, slow, liltg, but oh so elegant, like your rator, or Bill Blass. 2) Convertible: 1989-1997 Mazda MiataThe punch le to every straight a-hole's joke about what a gay r looks like, Mazda's morn take on the Brish roadsters of the 60's and 70's is, tth, Gay as Hell.

I’M NOT GAY I JT LOVE MIATAS SPORTS CAR APPAREL PULLOVER HOODIE

I personally wouldn't be ught ad drivg one public for fear of havg eggs thrown at my face, but the numero private tim I've driven my iends' Miatas I've found them fiendishly fun (and so cute, I jt want to Gay Marry them). They reprent a gay fantasy of some mid-century, Graham Greene, closet-se, Ambassadorial liftyle, wh lots of slim sus, afternoon cktail parti, and cute native pool boys.

4) Tck: 1981-1985 Volkswagen Rabb Diel PickupYou own a gay landspg bs, so you claim that you need a big tck.

I M NOT GAY I JT LOVE MY MIATA

Get some body lored pat and whe-out the V-O-L-K and E-N on the tailgate, and you have the gayt tck the world: the back of will read S-W-A-G5) Sedan: 1994-1997 Honda AcrdVote For Your Favore Dow-Dropp' Gay Car(polls)Your job's been elimated, your ndo's been foreclosed, and your Acura has been repo-ed. And as soon as you replace the purple neon washer nozzl and boom' ffee n exhst that the kid you bought om stalled, will be a very stealthy vehicle, eful for slippg unr the gaydar of the wdow-smashg neo-fascists who are sure to be on the rise once this prsn really gets some tractn, or the Children of Men-like crowds of angry urban out huntg for seemgly valuable gay prey.

I’M NOT GAY I JT LOVE MIATAS SHIRT

FIVE GAY CARS FOR THE ENOMIC APOLYPSEBY BRETT BERKOCTOBER 2, 2008SAVE THIS STORYSAVESAVE THIS STORYSAVEWH THE ARRIVAL OF THE FULL-ON ENOMIC MELTDOWN, EVERYONE NEEDS TO SLE BACK, EVEN THE GAYS. BUT CUTTG RNERS DON'T MEAN YOU N'T REMA CHIC. HERE ARE FIVE EXTREMELY ED—BUT STILL PELLG—RS YOU N EFULLY UTILIZE THE HARD TIM TO E, ONE FOR EACH OF THE RE HOMOSEXUAL (VEHICULAR) BODY-TYP.1) WAGON: 1979-1985 MERCES 300TDTHOUGH THE BENZ BOYS HAVE MA OTHER TOURG VEHICL THE HUNDRED OR SO YEARS SCE THEY VENTED THE TOMOBILE, THIS ONE IS THE CLASSIC. IT'S GAY AN UNRSTATED, BUT SOLIDLY TASTEFUL KD OF WAY: SUAL, SLOW, LILTG, BUT OH SO ELEGANT, LIKE YOUR RATOR, OR BILL BLASS. ON THE FISL DOOM SI, THE 300TD IS POWERED BY THE VENERABLE MERCES 5 CYLR DIEL, OFTEN REFERRED TO AS THE MOST DURABLE ENGE EVER CREATED—REGULARLY NNG FOR OVER A HALF-LN —SO THERE'LL BE NONE OF THOSE TROUBLG REPAIR BILLS (AT LEAST ON THIS PONENT). IN ADDN, YOU N EASILY GET THIS POWERPLANT NVERTED TO N ON ED RTRANT GREASE, AND YOU KNOW THAT A DOWN-TURNED AMERIN ENOMY, THERE'S GOG TO BE PLENTY OF CHEAP IED FOOD BEG NSUMED, SO YOU'RE GUARANTEED A STEADY SUPPLY OF FUEL. FALLY, THE REAR SEAT FOLDS DOWN, CREATG A RELATIVELY LARGE SPACE WHERE YOU (AND YOUR DOG, AND MAYBE ONE SMALL IEND) N LIVE.2) CONVERTIBLE: 1989-1997 MAZDA MIATATHE PUNCH LE TO EVERY STRAIGHT A-HOLE'S JOKE ABOUT WHAT A GAY R LOOKS LIKE, MAZDA'S MORN TAKE ON THE BRISH ROADSTERS OF THE 60'S AND 70'S IS, TTH, GAY AS HELL. I PERSONALLY WOULDN'T BE UGHT AD DRIVG ONE PUBLIC FOR FEAR OF HAVG EGGS THROWN AT MY FACE, BUT THE NUMERO PRIVATE TIM I'VE DRIVEN MY IENDS' MIATAS I'VE FOUND THEM FIENDISHLY FUN (AND SO CUTE, I JT WANT TO GAY MARRY THEM). THE FIRST-GENERATN RS ARE TNIER THE CURRENT MOL, SOMEWHAT UNRPOWERED, AND OFTEN A B BEAT UP, BUT TH GREAT DEPRSN-STYLE CHEAP. AND THEY'RE JAPANE-LEVEL RELIABLE, AS LONG AS YOU TAKE RE OF THEM (AND DON'T GET THEM STOLEN BY JOYRIDG TEENS AND FLIPPED TO A OZEN LAKE, WHICH ACTUALLY HAPPENED TO ONE OF MY PALS). OKAY, THEY HAVE ONLY TWO SEATS, MAKG THEM NOT EXACTLY FAY-IENDLY, BUT NOW THAT OUR ENOMY'S SPIRALG DOWN THE SHTER, YOU'RE GOG TO NEED TO CUT THAT SURROGATE LOOSE ANYWAY, THIRD TRIMTER OR NOT.MOST POPULARAND JT LIKE THAT: MICHAEL PATRICK KG KNOWS WHEN THE AUDIENCE TURNED ON CHE DIAZBY CHRIS MURPHYMARJORIE TAYLOR GREENE: IMPEACH BIN NOW OR I'LL SHUT DOWN THE GOVERNMENTBY ERIC LUTZKYLE DCHANEL, THE ROTHSCHILD WHO WASN’TBY NATE FREEMAN3) SUV: 1981-1991 ISUZU TROOPEREVERYONE KNOWS A FAG WHO'S BOUGHT (OR LTED AFTER) A VTAGE LAND ROVER. THEY REPRENT A GAY FANTASY OF SOME MID-CENTURY, GRAHAM GREENE, CLOSET-SE, AMBASSADORIAL LIFTYLE, WH LOTS OF SLIM SUS, AFTERNOON CKTAIL PARTI, AND CUTE NATIVE POOL BOYS. BUT WHILE THE LAND ROVERS ARE DURABLE ENOUGH TO TREK ACROSS AIN SERTS, OR BE ED AS THE LEAD VEHICLE A TRIBAL WARLORD PARA, THEY'RE BY NECSY HEAVY AND OVERBUILT, RENRG THEM EFFICIENT FOR OUR UGAL TIM. FORTUNATELY, I'VE FOUND A VIABLE SUBSTUTE. BUILT BIG AND UPRIGHT LIKE A CLASSIC BRISH SAFARI VEHICLE, BUT WH A TY UNRPOWERED FOUR-CYLR ENGE AND A WHG MANUAL TRANSMISSN, THIS IS THE FIRST GENERATN ISUZU TROOPER. MORE A POOR-MAN'S TOYOTA LAND CISER THAN A BUDGET LAND ROVER, THE TROOPER LIV UP TO S NAME,(AS LONG AS YOU DON'T LET TOUCH ROAD SALT; IF YOU DO, START UNTG BACKWARDS OM ONE AND WATCH DISSOLVE). ON THE BIG-TIME PL SI, WAS ONE OF THE FEW VEHICL EVER TO E EQUIPPED WH AN ALTIMETER—THAT'S A VICE THAT TELLS YOU HOW HIGH YOU ARE ABOVE SEA LEVEL—A FEATURE WHICH WILL E PECIALLY HANDY DURG THE NEXT IMPENDG GLOBAL TASTROPHIC EVENT: RISG TIS.MOST POPULARAND JT LIKE THAT: MICHAEL PATRICK KG KNOWS WHEN THE AUDIENCE TURNED ON CHE DIAZBY CHRIS MURPHYMARJORIE TAYLOR GREENE: IMPEACH BIN NOW OR I'LL SHUT DOWN THE GOVERNMENTBY ERIC LUTZKYLE DCHANEL, THE ROTHSCHILD WHO WASN’TBY NATE FREEMAN4) TCK: 1981-1985 VOLKSWAGEN RABB DIEL PICKUPYOU OWN A GAY LANDSPG BS, SO YOU CLAIM THAT YOU NEED A BIG TCK. BUT HOW MUCH (AHEM) EQUIPMENT ARE YOU ACTUALLY PACKG? A MOWER, A WEED-WHACKER, SOME CLIPPERS, A FEW HAND TOOLS, A BLOWER, AND TWO OR THREE PAIRS OF NAIL SCISSORS? WELL, 'S CNCH-TIME, SISTER. TIME TO TAKE THE LOSS ON YOUR RAM HEMI. FORTUNATELY, THE ENOMY'S LLAPSE CIS WH THE END OF GRASS-GROWG SEASON, SO THE ONLY THG YOU NEED TO CUT IS YOUR FUEL BILL. THANKFULLY, YOU N PICK UP ONE OF THE FOR ABOUT WHAT ALERS WILL BE OFFERG YOU FOR YOUR GAS-SWILLG, YEAR-OLD QUAD-CAB: A VOLKSWAGEN RABB DIEL PICKUP. THIS LTLE BABY IS ENOMY CLASS ALL THE WAY: HAS ONLY ENOUGH ROOM SI FOR YOU AND YOUR RRY-ONS, IS STRICTLY B.Y.O.E. (BRG YOUR OWN EVERYTHG), AND WILL S THREE ACROSS ONLY IF SOMEONE IS SI THE GUY THE CENTER POSN. BUT GETS ABOUT 45 M.P.G., LOOKS WEIRDLY STYLISH, AND HAS A FULLY FUNCTNAL RGO BED. I KNOW: 'S GERMAN. BUT, FORTUNATELY FOR THOSE OF YOU WHO DON'T LIKE TO GIVE YOUR PK DOLLARS TO THE VENTORS OF THE PK TRIANGLE, THIS PARTICULAR VEE-DUB WAS BUILT A DOMTIC PLANT PENNSYLVANIA. GET SOME BODY LORED PAT AND WHE-OUT THE V-O-L-K AND E-N ON THE TAILGATE, AND YOU HAVE THE GAYT TCK THE WORLD: THE BACK OF WILL READ S-W-A-G5) SEDAN: 1994-1997 HONDA ACRDVOTE FOR YOUR FAVORE DOW-DROPP' GAY CAR(POLLS)YOUR JOB'S BEEN ELIMATED, YOUR NDO'S BEEN FORECLOSED, AND YOUR ACURA HAS BEEN REPO-ED. YOUR BOYIEND LEFT YOU FOR SOMEONE WHO WOULDN'T DARE ASK HIM TO ENOMIZE BY SUBSTUTG SMIRNOFF FOR BELVERE. YOUR CLOST IENDS ARE RIDG THGS OUT AN OFF-THE-GRID MODULAR DOWN BELIZE. LEAVG YOU WH NOTHG BUT A SCHLE OF MOR SMETIC PROCR TO ANIZE YOUR DAYS. AND YOU HAVE TO GET TO THEM SOMEHOW (YOU'RE NOT GOG TO LET KASIA, G, AND D'REE DOWN THIS TIME OF CRISIS). SO, YOU BUY ONE OF THE: A LATE MOL HONDA ACRD. IT'S STILL GOT THE "CHET" OF BEG JAPANE. IT'S EFFICIENT AND PENDABLE. AND AS SOON AS YOU REPLACE THE PURPLE NEON WASHER NOZZL AND BOOM' FFEE N EXHST THAT THE KID YOU BOUGHT OM STALLED, WILL BE A VERY STEALTHY VEHICLE, EFUL FOR SLIPPG UNR THE GAYDAR OF THE WDOW-SMASHG NEO-FASCISTS WHO ARE SURE TO BE ON THE RISE ONCE THIS PRSN REALLY GETS SOME TRACTN, OR THE CHILDREN OF MEN-LIKE CROWDS OF ANGRY URBAN OUT HUNTG FOR SEEMGLY VALUABLE GAY PREY.BRETT BERK