Is Flirtg Between Gay and Straight Men Okay? | Psychology Today

Contents:

• CAN GAY AND STRAIGHT MEN REALLY BE FRIENDS?
• WHAT THE WORLD CAN LEARN FROM GAY-STRAIGHT FRIENDSHIPS
• GAY MEN AND STRAIGHT MEN AS FRIENDS
• GAY MEN AND STRAIGHT MEN AS FRIENDS
• CAN GAY AND STRAIGHT MEN REALLY BE FRIENDS?
• MORE IENDSHIPS BETWEEN GAY AND STRAIGHT MEN ULD MAKE EVERYBODY HAPPIER
• IS FLIRTG BETWEEN GAY AND STRAIGHT MEN OKAY?

CAN GAY AND STRAIGHT MEN REALLY BE FRIENDS?

For a long time, iendships between gay men and straight men – what some now ll “bromosexual” iendships – were unmon.

Homophobia was likely one reason; another was that straight men probably assumed they didn’t have much mon wh gay men. Specifilly, we’re terted lookg at the reasons gay men and straight men bee iends (or rema iends after the gay iend out).

WHAT THE WORLD CAN LEARN FROM GAY-STRAIGHT FRIENDSHIPS

We currently have a survey vtigatn unrway that explor some of the posive out of “bromosexual” iendships, cludg our theory that gay men and straight men n be optimal wg men for one another. Friendships between gay and straight men have always existed.

Many straight men hated to beiend gay men, fearg harassment, rejectn om their straight iends or beg lled gay. The growg acceptance of homosexualy, however, has allayed some of the fears. Gay men – particularly those nservative and ral environments – rema wary about tryg to beiend straight men, fearg prejudice-fueled rejectn.

At the same time, many straight men still doubt that they’ll be able to relate to gay men any meangful way and, for this reason, may not try to iate a iendship. Of urse, the tradnal notn that gay men and straight men nnot be close iends is herently homophobic and unte.

GAY MEN AND STRAIGHT MEN AS FRIENDS

We propose gay-straight male iendships are not only possible, but that they n grow to be extremely rewardg. If they’re open-md about beiendg gay men and make the effort to try to fe iendships based upon mon terts, gay men should feel more fortable reciprotg.

GAY MEN AND STRAIGHT MEN AS FRIENDS

So which straight men are the most likely to beiend gay men, and vice versa?

We know that gay men are now g out at an earlier age. Gay men who disclose their sexual orientatn to their straight male iends earlier life may be able to build more open and hont iendships wh them to adulthood.

Send, recent rearch has argued that genr and sexual orientatn might not be as black and whe as prevly thought, which opens up new avenu for explorg how gay and straight men n relate to one another.

CAN GAY AND STRAIGHT MEN REALLY BE FRIENDS?

If a straight guy and his gay male iend are ls rigid about their masculy and sexualy, they’ll probably be more likely to discs tails about their sexual and romantic liv openly wh one another.

MORE IENDSHIPS BETWEEN GAY AND STRAIGHT MEN ULD MAKE EVERYBODY HAPPIER

Recent rearch has suggted that advice sharg uld be a ccial reason that straight women seek out gay men as iends. In short, women are able to tst the datg advice om gay male iends bee they know their gay iends don’t have any ulterr motiv: They’re not tryg to hook up wh them or pete wh them for guys.

We believe that this same sort of unbiased advice sharg might also foster iendships between gay and straight men.

IS FLIRTG BETWEEN GAY AND STRAIGHT MEN OKAY?

Bee of the tst they engenr om straight women, gay men are uniquely posned to be excellent “wg men” for sgle straight men. However, straight women do tend to tst the datg advice of gay men (pecially more than advice om straight men or women).

Acrdgly, straight men uld get a leg up datg om beg close iends wh gay men. For example, a gay iend uld vouch for his straight iend’s good tentns to women.

Straight men who are fortable wh their sexualy may also act as wg men for gay male iends. Jt as a gay man might be able to pass on advice about women to his straight iend, a straight man uld nnect his gay male iend wh another sirable gay man, sce neher the gay man nor his straight iend are petg for the same person.