Gay Marriage: Same, but Different - The New York Tim

Contents:

• STRAIGHT UPL GET MARRIED EARLIER THAN GAY UPL. HERE'S A LOOK AT WHY.
• HETEROSEXUAL AND HOMOSEXUAL MARRIAG – ARE STRAIGHT AND GAY MARRIAG INTIL?
• GAY MARRIAGE VS STRAIGHT MARRIAGE
• ARE GAY MARRIAG HEALTHIER THAN STRAIGHT MARRIAG?
• DO GAY MARRIAGE AFFECT STRAIGHT MARRIAGE?
• GAY DIVORCE AND STRAIGHT DIVORCE: THE DIFFERENCE
• GAY MARRIAGE: SAME, BUT DIFFERENT
• THE RISE OF GAY MARRIAGE AND THE DECLE OF STRAIGHT MARRIAGE: WHERE'S THE LK?

STRAIGHT UPL GET MARRIED EARLIER THAN GAY UPL. HERE'S A LOOK AT WHY.

And until 2015 – when the Supreme Court legalized gay marriage – that didn't clu data shows that the average age at first marriage for homosexual upl was olr than heterosexual upl. Although Kerby wrote this article before same-sex marriage was legalized, his asssment of homosexual relatnships has not changed bee the trsilly disorred nature of same-sex relatnships has not changed. So before we even nsir the impact of homosexualy, same-sex marriage, and other alternative liftyl, we should nsir the benefs of tradnal marriage to society.

One headle proclaimed, “Married and Gay Coupl Not All that Different, ” and sentially said they were jt like the uple next door. {15} He shows that “mted” homosexual relatnships are radilly different om married upl at least six ways: relatnship duratn, monogamy vs.

Gay activists often pot to high divorce rat among married upl, suggtg that heterosexuals fare no better than homosexuals. For example, the Gay/Lbian Consumer Onle Cens of nearly 8, 000 homosexuals found that only 15% scribed their “current relatnship” lastg twelve years or longer. {17} A study of homosexual men the Netherlands published the journal AIDS found that the “duratn of steady partnerships” was one and a half years.

HETEROSEXUAL AND HOMOSEXUAL MARRIAG – ARE STRAIGHT AND GAY MARRIAG INTIL?

{18} In a study of male homosexualy reported Wtern Sexualy: Practice and Precept Past and Prent Tim, Pollak found that “few homosexual relatnships last longer than two years, wh many men reportg hundreds of lifetime partners. In the classic study by Bell and Weberg, they found that 43% of whe male homosexuals had sex wh 500 or more partners, wh 28% havg 1, 000 or more sex partners. {22} And a Dutch study of partnered homosexuals, published the journal AIDS, found that men wh a steady partner neverthels had an average of eight sexual partners per year.

The thors of The Male Couple reported that their study of 156 mal homosexual relatnships lastg om 1 to 37 years, “Only seven upl have a totally exclive sexual relatnship, and the men all have been together for ls than five years. ”{24} They also found that most homosexual men unrstood sexual relatns outsi the relatnship to be the norm, and ually viewed standards of monogamy as an act of opprsn. ” Timothy Dailey argu: “If homosexuals and lbians tly sired the same kd of mment signified by marriage, then one would expect them to take advantage of the opportuny to enter to civil unns or registered partnerships.

GAY MARRIAGE VS STRAIGHT MARRIAGE

However, is clear that few homosexuals and lbians have chosen to take advantage of the var unns (same-sex marriage, civil unns, domtic partnerships), suggtg a difference mment pared wh married upl. The three differenc (along wh others tailed by Timothy Dailey) monstrate a signifint difference between heterosexual and homosexual relatnships.

Although there is a ncerted effort to ph for homosexual marriage wh our society, we have seen this article that there are fundamental differenc between heterosexual marriage and homosexual marriage. Robert Gebeloff and Mary Jo Patterson, “Married and gay upl are not all that different, ” Tim-Piyune, 22 November 2003. Al., “The ntributn of steady and sual partnership to the cince of HIV fectn among homosexual men Amsterdam, ” AIDS, 17 (2003): 1031.

His new seri wh Harvt Hoe Publishers clus: A Biblil Pot of View on Islam, A Biblil Pot of View on Homosexualy, A Biblil Pot of View on Intelligent Dign and A Biblil Pot of View on Spirual Warfare. The followg paper par and ntrasts some of the siari and differenc between gay marriage and homosexual marriage.

ARE GAY MARRIAG HEALTHIER THAN STRAIGHT MARRIAG?

This issue has bee creasg proment over the last five years ternatnally as many untri have for the first time allowed gay marriage.

To the ends the followg paper will be divid to two sectns, first outlg the ma pots ncerng straight marriage before turng to gay marriage. Prr to turng to pare gay marriag, the fal characteristic of straight marriag is the fact that this unn reprents to society the ep mment between two people which ensur certa legal safeguards relatn to property, benefs, social cln and fay disput.

While straight marriag are often based around (to var gre) genr rol and differenc, gay marriag have to refe rol wh a marriage. At the same time, by removg the genr difference wh a gay marriage, there is a certa amount of eedom the distributn of tasks as this evably be based on agreement and operatn rather than by virtue of a pre-tablished genr difference and norm. Ined, one of the ma arguments ed by some dividuals who oppose gay marriage is the fact that marriage is an stutn which is veloped around children.

DO GAY MARRIAGE AFFECT STRAIGHT MARRIAGE?

In ncln, seems while there are unrstandable differenc between gay and straight marriage the sential quali of marriage still rema the same. Furthermore, there are few logil and ncise arguments that gay upl should be treated any differently to straight upl. Gay relatnships benef for beg the very thg straight relatnships are not: a unn of two people of the same sex.

Now that the Supreme Court has cid that gay marriag serve the same rights as straight on, ’s worth keepg md the fdgs of psychologists John and Julie Gottman, arguably the world’s leadg experts on what mak relatnships work.

They are fdg that gay and heterosexual marriag share a lot mon terms of why they thrive or fail, but on one of the biggt termants of maral succs—how upl fight—gay upl have an edge. For one peer-reviewed study published the Journal of Homosexualy, Gottman and his lleague Robert Levenson at the Universy of Washgton brought straight and gay upl to Gottman’s lab and terviewed each uple separately about an issue they fought about. In this study, the gay and straight upl brought up the same sort of problems, but gay upl were, by a statistilly signifint marg, ls fensive durg fights and more likely to e shared humor to soften the tensn of the nversatn.

GAY DIVORCE AND STRAIGHT DIVORCE: THE DIFFERENCE

“The gay and lbian upl, ” Gottman told me, “were much more open and much more direct, particularly when talkg about sex. He then refully watched how upl—both homosexual and heterosexual—teracted wh each other when discsg pots of nflict, tellg the story of how they met and reflectg on posive and negative memori of their relatnship. When monorg upl as they have a nversatn about relatnship nflicts, Gottman has found that straight upl feel more and more negative moods and emotns, like strs and anger, as a nversatn went on, whereas gay upl did not.

Beyond beg better at fightg, gay relatnships benef unexpected ways for beg the very thg that straight relatnships are not: a unn of two people of the same sex. As Liza Mundy poted out her Atlantic article, “The Gay Gui to Wedd Bliss, ” gay upl tend to be more egalarian than straight upl—which mak sense. What they do see, though, is that gay men are far more polyamoro than lbian women or men heterosexual relatnships.

GAY MARRIAGE: SAME, BUT DIFFERENT

About 60 percent of gay men, one study found, have had sex outsi of their marriage and 44 percent of them said that they had done so wh the blsg of their partner. Dan Savage, the gay sex lumnist, famoly ed the term “monogamish” to scribe the gay approach to extra-maral sex.

“They want to be physilly attached, ” Gottman says of gay men who have si-trysts, “but not emotnally attached. Hodg, the historic Supreme Court se that guarante marriage rights for gay upl all 50 stat, both liberal and nservative jtic poted out that gay marriage is a radilly new stutn.

The jtic are right: gay marriage is very new and seems to be, at least based on the social science rearch, different certa ways om straight marriage. Approval of same-sex relatnships has been steadily risg sce 2009 (Pew Rearch Center, 2017), and the 2015 Supreme Court cisn endorsg same-sex marriage was a w for many lbian, gay, and bisexual (LGB) dividuals. This is nsistent wh prev fdgs: Gay and bisexual men are exposed to mory strsors that n -stabilize relatnships (Meyer, 2003; L, 2012).

THE RISE OF GAY MARRIAGE AND THE DECLE OF STRAIGHT MARRIAGE: WHERE'S THE LK?

Prejudice, social strs, and mental health lbian, gay, and bisexual populatns: Conceptual issu and rearch evince. For stance, 45% of adults the Silent Generatn (those born between 1928 and 1945) favor allowg gays and lbians to wed, pared wh 74% of Millennials (born between 1981 and 1996). 4As wh the general public, Amerins who intify as lbian, gay, bisexual or transgenr (LGBT) are most likely to ce love as a very important reason for gettg married.

Sce then, several other European untri – cludg England and Wal, France, Ireland, all of Sndavia, Spa and, most recently, Atria, Germany and Malta – have legalized gay marriage. Like heterosexuals, many lbian, gay, and bisexual people want to form stable, long-lastg relatnships and many of them do.

In fact, rearchers have found that the majory of lbian, and gay, adults are mted relatnships and many upl have been together 10 or more years.