So, you thk you're straight, but you still feel a lot of weird guilt and anxiety when gay stuff up nversatn for no discernible reason? Or maybe the thought of beg wh someone of the same genr as you sends you to a weird panic? Could you be gay, but nial? Well, here's this handy ltle quiz ma jt for you!
Contents:
CALIFORNIA SCHOOL BOARD ADOPTS SOCIAL STUDI TEXTBOOKS THAT CLU GAY RIGHTS AFTER WARNGS OM ERNOR
* gay denial *
Some of my iends claims that gay nial is when you know that you are attracted to guys but tell yourself that will disappear by self or that is gross you know what you are but you act like you are straight so you manage to have a gf/be but you don't really love her/him or she/he don't really turns you on and you thk of guys/girls while havg sex until you fally e out of the closet. But some of my iends claim that you are not even aware that you are gay, you fantasize on girls and have sex wh them but one day you sudnly realize you are gay. Yeah I agree I never had feelg for guys ever but recently I started to qutn my sexualy the HARD way (prsn Obssive pulsive disorr ect) I tortur myself and got 5 erectn over gay thoughts 2 months but I feel like changed me like I might be bisexual (my fear beg to lose my heterosexualy bee wh all this sh girls don't aroe Le anymore but is another problems) so I asked myself uld I have been ignorg my bisexualy all my life (never felt aroed by guys until this fear me still not aroed by guys irl but I feel aroed by mcular guys maybe bee I'm a ltle b chubby) and we talked about nial for me a nial is somethg you knew but never or secretly engaged but some of my iend told me that I uld have masked my homosexual si after my 14 years old (I qutned my sexualy bee I was admirg a guy really bad (not love or sexually attracted to him but I wanted him to love me bee he was really ol and I was this ugly nerd.
But when I beme self nfint I stopped to chase his tert and stoped my rearched (cludg gay porn) and I lived my happy straight life fallg love wh girls and be aroed by them. But I adm that I lived this perd a horrible way(people lled me gay while I was tryg to unrstand who I was and whil I was love wh a girl "he is hidg his gayns" ahah! Guy nial - he is watchg gay porn, he even have sex wh other guys but - he will tell yourself that he isn't gay and was jt cursy or somethg else.
Married man (i was talkg to him uple days ago) who was always gay, was cheatg on his wife wh some guys but he told himself that he n't be gay - he have wife after all right? It's not nial or reprsn, 's jt that you never thk about that you might be gay, e there was nothg what "pull the trigger" and you go live your straight life e you're jt directed (by your parents and society) to be straight. I jt dated one girl bee when I was 22 I didn't like havg sex wh her and when I was at the beach I was checkg guys and when someone lled me gay I got very angry.
Homosexual inti n be scribed as closeted, homosexually self aware, gay/ lbian and non-gay intified. This classifitn privileg the role of self-fn. In g out, gay people tegrate, as bt as they n, dissociated aspects of the self. As gay people mt ci on a daily basis whether to reveal and to whom they will reveal, g out is a procs that never ends. * gay denial *
Now that I accept my self I don't re about beg lled gay or even have to date or kiss someone jt to ver up. The evince was all there, but took me a long time to say, "Hey, wow, I mt be gay, " particularly bee I was actively tryg to nvce myself I was straight and normal, pecially wh homophobic parents. Takg some time wh the realizatn is normal, to some gree, of urse; realizg you're gay is a b like realizg you need glass, and sce everyone jt assum their visn is normal (sce most people's visn is) n take a while for that thought to really occur to you.
I didn't get offend too much when/if people lled me gay - partly bee they didn't often do so - but when I was younger, I was ocsnally pretty outspoken (read: I was a very child) about potg out gay upl or nouncg gays some pacy nversatn ("they're WEIRD, but hey, as long as one of them don't make out wh me, that's okay... To the gree that I did ll out gays, I thk was to some gree mirrorg my father, who said the same thgs (which of urse didn't make any more jtified for me to pot out gays); however, I was also a lot more sktish on the topic, and quick to make clear that I didn't advote homosexualy, bee, I thk, I subnscly felt I was/might be/uld seem gay, and was guilty about that. In short, beg nial n e across outwardly as someone who's homophobic, but realy they're sayg those thgs part (if not primarily) to quell their own doubts, fears and spicns about their own sexualy.
A person who feels nied attractn will also feel unpleasant and exprs loudly when they see a gay uple of their own sex, or will be unfortable wh people of their own sex, of whom they know are gay/bi.