Move Past Gay Shame & Embrace Your LGBTQ Inty | myTherapyNYC

Contents:

• GAY SHAME
• TOM ALLEN: THE IA OF GAY SHAME STILL PERVAS
• GAY SHAME PILLORI LONDON BREED, GAY SF SUPERVISORS PRI MONTH INSTALLATN AT ATA
• DUCKIE: STRAIGHT PRI/GAY SHAME
• DO LONDON HAVE A HOMOPHOBIA PROBLEM WH THE GAY MUNY?
• LIVG AUTHENTILLY THE LGBTQ COMMUNY: HOW TO MOVE PAST “GAY SHAME” [VIO]
• TEN PK POUNDS FOR A GAY-BASHG
• 3 REASONS WHY GAY SHAME IS SO DAMAGG
• GAY MEN LONDON, OM PERSECUTN TO PRI
• THE BT GAY BARS LONDON
• GAY SHAME

GAY SHAME

Image source, Aemen SkarImage ptn, Allen says edy is a place where people n explore and celebrate their quirksAt the turn of the lennium, when edian Tom Allen was a teenager, a celebry g out as gay regularly ma headle late Boyzone sger Stephen Gately was splashed across the ont page of the Sun when he revealed he was gay 1999. When Brian Dowlg won the send seri of Big Brother 2001, the fact he was gay was notable and groundbreakg. "Those were such seismic events 15 or 20 years ago, " says Allen, whose new memoir studi the shame he felt growg up gay.

TOM ALLEN: THE IA OF GAY SHAME STILL PERVAS

"Image ptn, Allen recently appeared on a Covid-safe edn of Mock The Week, alongsi Rhys Jam and Athena KugblenuOcsnally, a story volvg homosexualy still has the power to make the news headl today, but only when 's somethg really out of the ordary. Equal marriage was troduced the UK 2014, and earlier this year Prime Mister Boris Johnson announced plans to outlaw gay nversn therapy were beg brought Allen not is "still tricky" for gay people to e out.

And not jt about beg gay - several of his personaly tras were the subject of ridicule, such as his drs sense, mic taste and posh accent.

GAY SHAME PILLORI LONDON BREED, GAY SF SUPERVISORS PRI MONTH INSTALLATN AT ATA

"That programme went out on Rad 4 on Sunday afternoons the 1960s, and wasn't legal to be gay at that pot, and yet here they were talkg gay slang.

The queer activist llective Gay Shame is at aga, this time wh a Pri Month stallatn at Valencia Street’s ATA that livers satiril mockeri of Mayor Breed, and Supervisors Rafael Manlman and Matt Dorsey. It’s Pri Month, so should not be surprisg that we’re hearg aga om the lol chapter of Gay Shame, the radil queer activist llective whose whole purpose is to be the anthis of Pri ftivi that are creasgly rporate, palized, and homogeno. While Gay Shame started New York Cy the late 1990s, the Gay Shame movement soon got self a San Francis chapter, which gaed promence ten or so years back for their vrlic anti-tech, anti-gentrifitn flyers and “Queers Hate Techi” stencil mpaign.

DUCKIE: STRAIGHT PRI/GAY SHAME

That was seen the wdows of the Valencia Street’s Artists’ Televisn Accs (ATA), and a Monday social media post tipped off that the Gay Shame gang was up to their old tricks wh a new stallatn the same via InstagramGay Shame’s Instagram acunt do seem to take cred for the act, and the stallatn has apparently been there for weeks.

“This June GAY SHAME is celebratg the grand openg of the LGBT-PIC Cop Cultural District, ” says the post dated June 8. “London Breed was joed at tonight’s ceremony by two of her Gay Bt Fascist (GBF) to celebrate Stonewall, the first pro-police rt.

DO LONDON HAVE A HOMOPHOBIA PROBLEM WH THE GAY MUNY?

” There were not paper artist’s statements as there were for the fnnch stallatn, though the words “Gay Shame” and “Queers Hate Cops”do appear stencil work at the bottom of the Joe Kura, SFistLet’s unpack what we see gog on here. A rdboard cutout of Mayor Breed is cuttg a rabow ribbon, while next to her, a cutout of openly gay SF Supervisor Rafael Manlman dons a police hat and holds an SFPD Joe Kura, SFistA cutout of gay District 6 Supervisor Matt Dorsey holds a “Party N Police” sign, a likely reference to his time as a police partment public relatns guy.

It’s tly the end of an a gay teenage Londoner the mid-90s, the first club I went to was Heaven, which felt somehow pulsory. And, like many other misfs, weirdos and queers, I felt right at this went agast the gra of the 90s gay scene. Rather than gym culture, dance mic, strippers and pills, Duckie meld the boozy bonhomie of gay die-pop night Popstarz wh the live-art vibe of the ICA, creatg what lled “homosexual honky-tonk”.

Ls nsumerist-aspiratnal gay, more sarky art-school queer, the crowd was thoughtful, bolshie and (mostly) kd. And 2014, after the pub’s sale to ternatnal velopers, helped secure legal protectns safeguardg s future, cludg makg a Gra II listed ’s Summer Tea Party, hosted by Amy Lamé Hull, part of the LGBT 50 celebratns markg the 50th anniversary of the crimalisatn of homosexualy England and Wal.

LIVG AUTHENTILLY THE LGBTQ COMMUNY: HOW TO MOVE PAST “GAY SHAME” [VIO]

Photograph: Keh Larby/AlamyBeyond the RVT, Duckie creat big immersive parti such as the sbroly ironic Gay Shame, held each year on the night of Pri London. I’m performg at Duckie on 18 June and when I was wonrg what to do, I sudnly remembered a character I ed to play – a gay man who talks about sex all the time.

TEN PK POUNDS FOR A GAY-BASHG

So I will be reprisg has been very fluential the sense of puttg forward what I would ll a queer athetic, as opposed to a gay athetic. Photograph: Am Lennon/The ObserverDuckie was such a clear alternative to the sanised, cynil, money-makg London gay clubs of the 1990s. We were playg rerds that you didn’t really hear clubs – X-Ray Spex, Kate Bh – whereas everythg on the gay scene back then was hoe or really chey pop.

We had no experience of playg to gay crowds, even though we’re gay ourselv, so we were like: “What are the gay people gog to do when they hear Jilted John or Sound and Visn, are we gog to get attacked?

3 REASONS WHY GAY SHAME IS SO DAMAGG

I thk the ls rigid mic that you hear on the gay scene now has que a lot to do wh and the fact that people are more open about what you n have on stage, rather than jt a drag queen. Born the Wt Midlands, he worked as an NHS dlogist before beg a wrerWhen I moved to London the mid-90s, I uldn’t fd any plac on the mastream gay scene that felt like they were for me. There were lots and lots of leather boys and had that air of a b exced, pent-up sexualy that gay boys generate.

Sure, at this year’s Pri celebratns there was the ual homophobic picketg, but those voic are growg fater and ls relevant pared wh the wispread acceptance of LGBT people. The troductn of gay marriage Ireland and the US appears further proof that, by and large, the war agast bigotry has been won.

Bee while prejudice om straight people ntu to dwdle, homophobia among gay men means that the muny is danger of eatg self om the si men’s homophobia may sound oxymoronic, but ’s creasgly apparent a culture that priz masculy and ris mpns. You n see when gay men who nform to stereotyp by worshippg Beyoncé, quotg RuPl or drsg flamboyantly are met wh a wce or said to be lettg the si down. Increasgly, appears that the divi is no longer between heteros and homos, but gay men who separate to ‘mp’ and ‘straight-actg’, a term that impli a gree of and proud: Alan CarrTake Grg Armani’s recent ments.

GAY MEN LONDON, OM PERSECUTN TO PRI

The signer, who was a long-term relatnship wh archect Serg Galeotti until the latter’s ath om AIDS 1985, said an terview April that ‘a man has to be a man’ and gay men ‘do not need to drs homo-sexual’.

Two weeks earlier, the gay actor Rsell Tovey had ed a siar furore when he spoke of his relief at attendg a tough school that allowed him to pe his sty as a ‘really effemate, tap-dancg eak’. I have a iend, Daniel, a 34-year-old teacher om Hackney, who says he’s had men approach him bars, only to ‘tell me that I’m too mp as soon as I open my mouth’: ‘It’s prsg to see gay men attackg each other, when we should be alli.

THE BT GAY BARS LONDON

Comments such as ‘If I wanted to go out wh a girl, I’d date women’ abound wh gay circl and feed the notn that to be mp is to be trsilly ’s behd the phenomenon?

Next year, Matthew Todd, edor of Attu, the UK’s bt-sellg gay magaze, will publish Straight Jacket, examg issu surroundg gay shame. He suggts that such prejudic have a siar root when exprsed by gay people as straight: ‘Gay people grow up hearg the same msag that straight people who end up beg homophobic hear, ’ he says. ‘There aren’t magil ear plugs that gay kids are given to stop them absorbg society’s homophobia, so naturally they ternalise .

GAY SHAME

He draws parisons wh how femism benefs men, by eeg them om rtrictive norms, and how a crease homophobia would siarly benef straight men. ‘I’d go as far as to say that most homophobia directed at young men growg up is directed at straight men. ’William, 29, a gay graphic signer, tells me he ‘n’t stand the spectacle of Pri’ bee ‘all those men dancg on floats don’t speak to me about my life.

’ This embarrassment, says sex and relatnship therapist Dr Joe Kort, may be rooted gay men’s often plited relatnships wh their own masculy: ‘Gay men are tght om a young age that they are not manly enough, ferr and wrong. There’s a tenncy to bee hyper-masculised and exprs prejudice toward other gay men who don’t “pass” as straight.

’ This isn’t, he says, a phenomenon unique to gay men: ‘We see this other mori, too — is lled lateral discrimatn. ’ It seems likely that when gay men react to mp — be wh annoyance or enthiasm — they are reactg to somethg that they are eher fortable or unfortable wh themselv. Acrdg to Todd, gay men have been so by fightg for equal rights that relatns wh the muny have been neglected.