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“Fellas, is gay to make money?? I mean you’re jt llectg pictur of other men,” Twter personaly Childish Sadbo recently tweeted, one of many “fellas” mem to recently pop up onle…

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FELLAS, IS IT GAY TO LOVE THE ‘FELLAS, IS IT GAY’ MEME?

* fellas is it gay to *

“Fellas, is gay to make money?? I mean you’re jt llectg pictur of other men, ” Twter personaly Childish Sadbo recently tweeted, one of many “fellas” mem to recently pop up onle, skewerg how obssed a lot of guys are wh not “seemg” gay.

FELLAS, IS REALLY GAY TO EXPRS AFFECTN FOR YOUR HOMI?

Fellas, is gay to acknowledge another man’s existence before 12 p.m.? * fellas is it gay to *

”At least amongst the guys onle, the “gay” part is no longer the bnt of their macho jok — the pulsive sire to assert one’s straightns is. An creasg and alarmg number of cishet men performg purportedly homosexual behavr n be seen on social media.

FELLAS, IS IT GAY TO SAY GOOD MORNG TO ANOTHER MAN?

Books shelved as fellas-is--gay: The Gentleman's Gui to Vice and Virtue by Mackenzi Lee, The Raven Boys by Maggie Stiefvater, The Song of Achill by... * fellas is it gay to *

Current rearch suggts there is also a crease homophobia and homohysteria. Our study aims to explore how chang support of homosexualy have also changed the language of homosocial relatnships. In this ntext, homohysteria is fed as the heterosexual’s fear of beg thought gay when performg genr atypil behavrs.

Homophobia is fed as attus and behavrs that monstrate tolerance of sexual acts, inti, moraly, and the rights of homosexuals. To tt our hypothis that cisgenr heterosexual (cishet) men will e language monly xed and rrelated wh the language of women and homosexual men when teractg homosocial nversatns wh close iends, we analyzed 40 TikTok vios which featured cishet men homosocial environments, and rerd five 30–40-mute nversatns that took place eher person or onle via Zoom and Disrd.

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why misogynists are so boy crazy (spoiler: 's not cuz they're gay) * fellas is it gay to *

We found that cishet men, when a fortable settg wh other cishet men, seem to e lguistic patterns that are typilly xed wh cishet women and gay men.

FELLAS, EVERYTHG IS GAY

fellas is gay, Southeast Asia\'s leadg anime, ics, and gam (ACG) muny where people n create, watch and share engagg vios. * fellas is it gay to *

The most puzzlg part: the #nohomo and #homiexual tags unrneath. In recent years, ntemporary pop culture seems to have an obssn wh homosexualy — jt whout the part that requir anyone volved to actually intify as non-heterosexual. Like the TikToks mentned above, var other social platforms, such as YouTube and Instagram, seem to be beg home to male fluencers engagg “gay” behavrs wh other men, spe neher party volved actually intifyg as part of the LGBTQ+ muny.

From the inic “Two bros stg a hot tub” Ve (Figure 1, re-upload to YouTube here), to recent onle disurse about men keepg their socks on durg sex acts wh other men to keep “no homo” (Figure 2), performative homosexualy seems to always be played for edic effect.

BRAAD BOOKCLUBSUBSCRIBESIGN {"@NTEXT":","@TYPE":"NEWSARTICLE","URL":","MAENTYOFPAGE":","HEADLE":"FELLAS, IS GAY TO HATE WOMEN?","SCRIPTN":"WHY MISOGYNISTS ARE SO BOY CRAZY (SPOILER: 'S NOT CUZ THEY'RE GAY)","IMAGE":[{"@TYPE":"IMAGEOBJECT","URL":"}],"DATEPUBLISHED":"2022-08-29T15:00:30+00:00","DATEMODIFIED":"2022-08-29T15:00:30+00:00","ISACCSIBLEFORFREE":TE,"THOR":[{"@TYPE":"PERSON","NAME":"MATILDA EKLUND","URL":","SCRIPTN":"HYPOMANIC PIXIE DREAM GIRL","INTIFIER":"ER:14764008","SAMEAS":["],"IMAGE":{"@TYPE":"IMAGEOBJECT","NTENTURL":","THUMBNAILURL":"}}],"PUBLISHER":{"@TYPE":"ORGANIZATN","NAME":"BRAAD BOOKCLUB","URL":","SCRIPTN":"WHATEVER I\U2019M CURRENTLY OVERTHKG","TERACTNSTATISTIC":{"@TYPE":"INTERACTNCOUNTER","NAME":"SUBSCRIBERS","TERACTNTYPE":","ERINTERACTNCOUNT":100},"INTIFIER":"PUB:1048365","SAMEAS":["]}}SHARE THIS POSTFELLAS, IS GAY TO HATE WOMEN?COPY LKFACEBOOKEMAILNOTOTHERFELLAS, IS GAY TO HATE WOMEN?

Fellas, is gay to acknowledge another man’s existence before 12 p.m.? * fellas is it gay to *

However, wh the emergence of the phenomenon of men “playg gay” onle njunctn wh the troductn of words like “homiexual, ” we were cur as to the ways which language played a role homosocial relatnships, or the relatnships between cisgenr heterosexual mal.

'ORRG DSERT IS A RED FLAG': 13 'FELLAS IS IT GAY?' MEM TO HELP THE BROS BE MORE MASCULE

Books shelved as fellas-is--gay: The Gentleman's Gui to Vice and Virtue by Mackenzi Lee, The Song of Achill by Male Miller, Aristotle and Dante... * fellas is it gay to *

A famo Ve where the er zooms on two men, distanced a hot tub, while sgg “Two bros stg a hot tub five feet apart ‘cuz they’re not gay.

Current lerature intifi three phenomena — homophobia, homohysteria, and queerbag — as re to the emergence of the inty of the homiexual, which, acrdg to the NYT volv “straight men who go beyond bromance and display nonsexual signs of physil affectn.

Homophobia is an umbrella term for all attus and behavrs that monstrate tolerance of sexual acts, inti, moraly, and the rights of homosexuals (McCormack & Anrson, 2014). Homohysteria volv the heterosexual male fear of beg thought gay when performg genr atypil behavrs (McCormack, 2011). Queerbag and gayba are the liberate sertn of homoerotic subtext orr to urt a queer followg whout actualizg the subtext (Brennan, 2018).

FELLAS IS GAY

Primarily, rearch on the subject centers on how creas the acceptance of homosexualy and creas homophobia and homohysteria have led to new terpretatns of what means to be a cishet male (McCormack & Anrson, 2010; McCormack, 2011). Our rearch aims to fill the gap between the intifitn of the cultural phenomena and the analysis of specific lguistic forms and explore how chang support of homosexualy have also changed homosocial relatnships. There has also been some study of the ncept of “soundg gay” and the ia that non-heterosexual men, specifilly homosexual men, often x the speech of heterosexual men orr to seem “straight passg” (Gd, 1994).

¡HOLA PAPI!SUBSCRIBESIGN {"@NTEXT":","@TYPE":"NEWSARTICLE","URL":","MAENTYOFPAGE":","HEADLE":"IS SPACE GAY?","SCRIPTN":"FELLAS...","IMAGE":[{"@TYPE":"IMAGEOBJECT","URL":"}],"DATEPUBLISHED":"2020-05-28T15:16:51+00:00","DATEMODIFIED":"2020-05-28T15:16:51+00:00","ISACCSIBLEFORFREE":TE,"THOR":[{"@TYPE":"PERSON","NAME":"JOHN PL BRAMMER","URL":","SCRIPTN":"AUTHOR, ILLTRATOR, AND ADVICE LUMNIST ENGAGG GENERAL JOTER\U00EDA.","INTIFIER":"ER:5497387","IMAGE":{"@TYPE":"IMAGEOBJECT","NTENTURL":","THUMBNAILURL":"}}],"PUBLISHER":{"@TYPE":"ORGANIZATN","NAME":"\U00A1HOLA PAPI!","URL":","SCRIPTN":"WRG, ART, AND MORE OM JOHN PL BRAMMER.","TERACTNSTATISTIC":{"@TYPE":"INTERACTNCOUNTER","NAME":"SUBSCRIBERS","TERACTNTYPE":","ERINTERACTNCOUNT":10000},"INTIFIER":"PUB:23683","LOGO":{"@TYPE":"IMAGEOBJECT","URL":","NTENTURL":","THUMBNAILURL":"},"IMAGE":{"@TYPE":"IMAGEOBJECT","URL":","NTENTURL":","THUMBNAILURL":"},"SAMEAS":["]}}SHARE THIS POSTIS SPACE GAY?COPY LKFACEBOOKEMAILNOTOTHERIS SPACE GAY?

We hypothize that cisgenr, heterosexual (cishet) men will e language monly xed and rrelated wh the language of women and homosexual men when teractg homosocial nversatns wh close iends. We analyzed 40 TikTok vios om pilatn vios on YouTube wh tl such as “straight guys beg gay guys” or om the TikTok tags “#nohomo” or #homiexual”. G., “gay chicken”).

signals of disfort after iatg gay behavr. edic effect created through homohysteria.

droppg the gay act the prence of a third party. e of a third party (girliend or other dience) to signal that gayns is not ser. hypersexualizatn of gayns (e.

FELLAS, IS IT GAY TO SAY GOOD MORNG TO ANOTHER MAN?

G., horns or makg sexual advanc beg the foremost marker of gayns). gayns beg graed heterosexual male iendships.

FELLAS, IS IT GAY? YENTL (THE YHIVA BOY)

e of the phrase “no homo” to ward off homosexualy. Fdgs om the TikToks n be grouped to three tegori: homohysteria and heteronormativy, genr rol and misnceptns about homosexualy, and the spectm, or lack thereof, of male timacy. Homohysteria and heteronormativy.

FELLAS, IS IT GAY?SUBSCRIBESIGN {"@NTEXT":","@TYPE":"NEWSARTICLE","URL":","MAENTYOFPAGE":","HEADLE":"FELLAS, IS IT GAY? VENMO","SCRIPTN":"\U201CCAN YOU CHANGE YOUR VENMO PICTURE TO SOMETHG OF YOU NOT LICKG SOMEONE ELSE\U2019S NECK?\U201D","IMAGE":[{"@TYPE":"IMAGEOBJECT","URL":"}],"DATEPUBLISHED":"2021-12-06T21:07:39+00:00","DATEMODIFIED":"2021-12-06T21:07:39+00:00","ISACCSIBLEFORFREE":TE,"THOR":[{"@TYPE":"PERSON","NAME":"ALYSE BURNSI","URL":","SCRIPTN":" GAY? \NTHE VTIGATIVE JOURNALISM OF @EYMTER & @ICSANSTORM","INTIFIER":"ER:5686546","SAMEAS":["],"IMAGE":{"@TYPE":"IMAGEOBJECT","NTENTURL":","THUMBNAILURL":"}}],"PUBLISHER":{"@TYPE":"ORGANIZATN","NAME":"FELLAS, IS IT GAY?","URL":","SCRIPTN":"\U2727\UFF65\UFF9F: *\U2727\UFF65\UFF9F:* A NEWSLETTER WHICH WE TELL YOU WHAT'S GAY \U2727\UFF65\UFF9F: *\U2727\UFF65\UFF9F:*","TERACTNSTATISTIC":{"@TYPE":"INTERACTNCOUNTER","NAME":"SUBSCRIBERS","TERACTNTYPE":","ERINTERACTNCOUNT":10},"INTIFIER":"PUB:390967","LOGO":{"@TYPE":"IMAGEOBJECT","URL":","NTENTURL":","THUMBNAILURL":"},"IMAGE":{"@TYPE":"IMAGEOBJECT","URL":","NTENTURL":","THUMBNAILURL":"},"SAMEAS":["]}}SHARE THIS POSTFELLAS, IS IT GAY? COPY LKFACEBOOKEMAILNOTOTHERFELLAS, IS IT GAY? VENMO

TikTok creators relied on the ncept of heteronormativy, the assumptn that everyone is straight, as well as the normalizatn of homohysteria to create a edic effect. Cishet men also played up homohysteria for humor by actg gay or htg at one another’s gayns, while simultaneoly exprsg disfort. Heteronormativy also manifted self more subtly other ways: men filmed gay TikToks ont of their girliends, rercg the norm of heterosexual hegemony by g the ia of gay upl as a joke (Figure 3).

FELLAS IS IT GAY BOOKS

Genr rol and misnceptns of homosexualy. Other TikToks revealed the genr norms prevalent between male relatnships, as well as a clear misterpretatn of homosexualy by cishet men.

Cishet men, actg gay, often joked that their girliends wouldn’t “fd out” ignorg moraly (of cheatg on a signfint other) favor of producg a humoro effect (Figure 3). They also hypersexualized gayns; many teractns volved words such as “horny, ” “sexy, ” and words relatg to the sexual ans, and behavrs such as moang or eatg a ssage.

FELLAS, IS GAY TO HAVE SEX WH WOMEN?

This hypersexualizatn often blurred the le of fort for those on the receivg end of a straight man’s gay advanc—many men were nfed and/or unfortable, as evinced by their facial exprsns or verbal reactns, even though they did not rist (Figure 5). The behavrs signal misnceptns, often harmful, about male homosexualy—that homosexualy is herently more sexual or ls ethil than heterosexualy. In particular, men equently said “no homo” to immediately elimate any assumptns of legimate homosexualy.

On the other end of the spectm, they often played “gay chicken” ( which they ntued to act more and more gay until one person fally cracked) or tried to one-up each other acts of gayns. Cisgenr and heterosexual men, teractns wh other cisgenr and heterosexual men, tend to e lguistic patterns xed wh gay men or straight women; the patterns clu higher tonatn and hedgg. In addn, cishet men e flirtat speech the homosocial environments, such as pliments, pet nam, and sexually-charged ments, many of which were observed wh higher tonatn.

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An important note to make, however, is that spe siari speech patterns, many of the behavrs cishet men exhib homosocial settgs are not xed wh gay men or straight women. The ma ncln we n draw om our fdgs is that spe creasg levels of homophobia and shiftg views on non-tradnal forms of masculy, sexualy, and genr, heteronormativy and genr norms rema prevalent. As explaed the analysis sectn, cishet men’s “gay act” reli on heteronormativy to create humor the first place.

FELLAS, IS GAY TO MURR SOMEONE — DRACULA AND THE QUEER HISTORY OF VAMPIR

The nventn of male domance also may expla the petive aspect of actg gay. Th, although cishet men know how to x gay or non-cishet male inti, as dited by their shifted speech patterns, they are still heavily fluenced by larger outsi forc that suggt our views have yet to fully break away om the heterosexual and patriarchal norms. Everyone Is Gay on TikTok (New York Tim).

Soundg gay: Pch properti the speech of gay and straight men.

'ORRG DSERT IS A RED FLAG': 13 'FELLAS IS IT GAY?' MEM TO HELP THE BROS BE MORE MASCULE

(2011) Mappg the Terra of Homosexually-Themed Language, Journal of Homosexualy, 58:5, 664-679, DOI: 10.

*BEAR-MAGAZINE.COM* FELLAS IS IT GAY TO

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15.9303C0.0874636 17.264 0.878901 18.6348 2.21255 18.9922L5.37495 19.8396V7.66664C5.37495 6.40099 6.40096 5.37498 7.66661 5.37498H19.4723C19.3299 5.30548 19.1788 5.24858 19.0201 5.20604L6.785 1.92766Z" stroke="none"></path><path fill-le="evenodd" clip-le="evenodd" d="M8.44161 7.4C7.86632 7.4 7.39995 7.86637 7.39995 8.44167V22.1081C7.39995 22.6834 7.86631 23.1498 8.4416 23.1498L22.1083 23.15C22.6836 23.15 23.1499 22.6836 23.1499 22.1083V8.44167C23.1499 7.86637 22.6836 7.4 22.1083 7.4H8.44161ZM10.3999 9.65C9.84766 9.65 9.39995 10.0977 9.39995 10.65C9.39995 11.2023 9.84766 11.65 10.3999 11.65H18.3999C18.9522 11.65 19.3999 11.2023 19.3999 10.65C19.3999 10.0977 18.9522 9.65 18.3999 9.65H10.3999ZM10.3999 14.15C9.84766 14.15 9.39995 14.5977 9.39995 15.15C9.39995 15.7023 9.84766 16.15 10.3999 16.15H15.3999C15.9522 16.15 16.3999 15.7023 16.3999 15.15C16.3999 14.5977 15.9522 14.15 15.3999 14.15H10.3999Z" stroke="none"></path></g></svg></div><div class="pencraft 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ontend-pencraft-Text-module__weight-normal--s54Wf ontend-pencraft-Text-module__font-text--QmNJR ontend-pencraft-Text-module__lor-sendary--WRADg ontend-pencraft-Text-module__ret--dW0zZ ontend-pencraft-Text-module__body4--Pl3xY">Other</div></button></div></div></div></div></div></div></div><div class="post-hear"><h1 class="post-tle unpublished">Fellas, Is It Gay? Venmo</h1><div class="pencraft ontend-pencraft-Box-module__ret--VfQY8 ontend-pencraft-Box-module__display-flex--ZqeZt ontend-pencraft-Box-module__flex-directn-lumn--Rq7pk ontend-pencraft-Box-module__paddg-bottom-16--KVxKv"><div class="pencraft ontend-pencraft-Box-module__ret--VfQY8 ontend-pencraft-Box-module__display-flex--ZqeZt ontend-pencraft-Box-module__flex-directn-lumn--Rq7pk ontend-pencraft-Box-module__paddg-y-16--ohCEm"><div class="pencraft ontend-pencraft-Box-module__ret--VfQY8 ontend-pencraft-Box-module__display-flex--ZqeZt ontend-pencraft-Box-module__flex-jtify-start--_8fEd ontend-pencraft-Box-module__flex-align-center--rSd6h ontend-pencraft-Box-module__flex-gap-12--rODKq"><div class="pencraft ontend-pencraft-Box-module__ret--VfQY8 ontend-pencraft-Box-module__display-flex--ZqeZt"><div class="pencraft ontend-pencraft-Box-module__flexGrow--mx4xz ontend-pencraft-Box-module__ret--VfQY8 ontend-pencraft-Box-module__display-flex--ZqeZt ontend-pencraft-Box-module__flex-align-center--rSd6h ontend-pencraft-Box-module__flex-gap-8--HFpIK facepile"><div class="pencraft ontend-pencraft-Box-module__ret--VfQY8 ontend-pencraft-Box-module__display-flex--ZqeZt ontend-pencraft-Box-module__flex-align-center--rSd6h"><div class="pencraft ontend-pencraft-Box-module__ret--VfQY8 ontend-pencraft-Box-module__display-flex--ZqeZt ontend-pencraft-Box-module__flex-align-center--rSd6h ontend-ponents-Facepile-module__fac--FVkdk ontend-ponents-Facepile-module__size-40--pH6IT"><div class="profile-hover-rd-target ontend-rear2-ProfileAndPublitnHoverCard-module__profileHoverCardTarget--Od_YL"><a href=" target="_blank" rel="noopener" class="pencraft ontend-pencraft-Box-module__flexAuto--CnX9I ontend-pencraft-Box-module__ret--VfQY8 ontend-pencraft-Box-module__display-flex--ZqeZt"><picture><source type="image/webp" srcset=" /><img src=" siz="100vw" alt style="z-x: 1;" width="80" class="ontend-ponents-rponsive_img-module__img--Pgjj2 facepile-face ontend-ponents-Facepile-module__face--uAQkp ontend-ponents-Facepile-module__size-40--pH6IT ontend-ponents-Facepile-module__first--TZamh ontend-ponents-Facepile-module__last--DT3p3" /></picture></a></div></div></div></div></div><div class="pencraft ontend-pencraft-Box-module__ret--VfQY8 ontend-pencraft-Box-module__display-flex--ZqeZt ontend-pencraft-Box-module__flex-directn-lumn--Rq7pk"><div class="pencraft ontend-pencraft-Box-module__ret--VfQY8 ontend-pencraft-Text-module__size-11--k1e8b ontend-pencraft-Text-module__le-height-20--p0dP8 ontend-pencraft-Text-module__weight-medium--x7khA ontend-pencraft-Text-module__font-meta--U_nxy ontend-pencraft-Text-module__lor-pub-primary-text--RzL7j ontend-pencraft-Text-module__transform-upperse--IDkUL ontend-pencraft-Text-module__ret--dW0zZ ontend-pencraft-Text-module__meta--jzHdd"><div class="profile-hover-rd-target ontend-rear2-ProfileAndPublitnHoverCard-module__profileHoverCardTarget--Od_YL"><a href=" class="pencraft ontend-pencraft-Box-module__ret--VfQY8 ontend-pencraft-Text-module__ratn-hover-unrle--BEYAn ontend-pencraft-Text-module__ret--dW0zZ">Alyse Burnsi</a></div></div><div class="pencraft ontend-pencraft-Box-module__ret--VfQY8 ontend-pencraft-Box-module__display-flex--ZqeZt ontend-pencraft-Box-module__flex-gap-4--zeW5_"><div class="pencraft ontend-pencraft-Box-module__ret--VfQY8 ontend-pencraft-Text-module__size-11--k1e8b ontend-pencraft-Text-module__le-height-20--p0dP8 ontend-pencraft-Text-module__weight-medium--x7khA ontend-pencraft-Text-module__font-meta--U_nxy ontend-pencraft-Text-module__lor-pub-sendary-text--OzRTa ontend-pencraft-Text-module__transform-upperse--IDkUL ontend-pencraft-Text-module__ret--dW0zZ ontend-pencraft-Text-module__meta--jzHdd">Dec 6, 2021</div></div></div></div></div><div class="pencraft ontend-pencraft-Box-module__flexGrow--mx4xz ontend-pencraft-Box-module__ret--VfQY8 ontend-pencraft-Box-module__display-flex--ZqeZt ontend-pencraft-Box-module__flex-jtify-space-between--NvIcg ontend-pencraft-Box-module__flex-align-center--rSd6h ontend-pencraft-Box-module__flex-gap-16--TpblU ontend-pencraft-Box-module__paddg-y-16--ohCEm ontend-pencraft-Box-module__borr-top-tail-themed--e17yZ ontend-pencraft-Box-module__borr-bottom-tail-themed--eVwFY post-ufi"><div class="pencraft ontend-pencraft-Box-module__ret--VfQY8 ontend-pencraft-Box-module__display-flex--ZqeZt ontend-pencraft-Box-module__flex-gap-8--HFpIK"><div class="like-button-ntaer post-ufi-button style-button"><a role="button" class="post-ufi-button style-button has-label wh-borr"><svg role="img" style="height: 20px; 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5.11625C6.67234 5.07142 6.0443 5.16173 5.45654 5.38103C4.86882 5.60031 4.33502 5.94355 3.89153 6.38727L1.70423 8.57506L1.69534 8.5841C0.898438 9.40939 0.457483 10.5147 0.467451 11.662C0.477418 12.8094 0.937512 13.9069 1.74864 14.7182C2.55976 15.5295 3.65701 15.9897 4.80407 15.9996C5.95113 16.0096 7.05622 15.5685 7.88132 14.7715L7.89035 14.7626L9.13717 13.5155C9.42192 13.2307 9.42192 12.7689 9.13717 12.4841C8.85243 12.1993 8.39077 12.1993 8.10602 12.4841L6.86392 13.7265C6.31432 14.2552 5.57945 14.5477 4.81675 14.5411C4.05204 14.5344 3.32054 14.2276 2.77979 13.6868C2.23904 13.1459 1.93231 12.4142 1.92566 11.6494C1.91904 10.8865 2.21146 10.1514 2.74011 9.60172L4.92287 7.41846C5.21854 7.12262 5.57437 6.89384 5.96621 6.74763C6.35805 6.60143 6.77674 6.54123 7.19389 6.57111C7.61104 6.601 8.01688 6.72026 8.38389 6.92082C8.75091 7.12138 9.0705 7.39855 9.32101 7.73352C9.56221 8.05605 10.0191 8.12194 10.3416 7.88068C10.6641 7.63942 10.7299 7.18238 10.4887 6.85985C10.113 6.3574 9.63359 5.94165 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class="label">Share</div></a></div></div></div></div><div class="visibily-check"></div><div class class><div class="available-ntent"><div dir="to" class="body markup"><div class="ptned-image-ntaer"><figure><a class="image-lk is-viewable-img image2" target="_blank" href=" data-ponent-name="Image2ToDOM" rel="nofollow ugc noopener"><div class="image2-set"><picture><source type="image/webp" srcset=" 424w, 848w, 1272w, 1456w" siz="100vw" /><img src=" width="374" height="479.91979949874684" data-attrs="{"src":" of Christ Drivg the Money Lenrs om the Temple","tle":null,"type":"image/eg","href":null,"belowTheFold":false,"topImage":te,"ternalRedirect":null}" class="sizg-normal" alt="Patg of Christ Drivg the Money Lenrs om the Temple" tle="Patg of Christ Drivg the Money Lenrs om the Temple" srcset=" 424w, 848w, 1272w, 1456w" siz="100vw" fetchprry="high" /></picture><div class="image-lk-expand"><svg xmlns=" width="16" height="16" viewBox="0 0 24 24" fill="none" stroke="#FFFFFF" stroke-width="2" stroke-lep="round" stroke-lejo="round" class="luci luci-maximize2"><polyle pots="15 3 21 3 21 9"></polyle><polyle pots="9 21 3 21 3 15"></polyle><le x1="21" x2="14" y1="3" y2="10"></le><le x1="3" x2="10" y1="21" y2="14"></le></svg></div></div></a><figptn class="image-ptn"><em>Christ Drivg the Money Lenrs om the Temple. Slay!</em></figptn></figure></div><div><hr /></div><p><em>We’re very exced to brg you this funny, hont vtigatn of Venmo by our iend Melanie Dieg, a maker of pots, maps, and credible wisdoms. Once, at Gger’s—where you n often fd Mel now that ’s BACK BABY—iends were havg a heated discsn, and Mel, whom I’d barely spoken to at this early juncture our iendship, proclaimed a monotone, “All drama is urted.” I’ve been chewg on for years.</em></p><p><em>-Ey and Alyse</em></p><p><em>P.S. We had some thoughts about Venmo too. See the end of this piece for our mgs and a playlist Mel ma for the ocsn.</em></p><div><hr /></div><div class="ptned-image-ntaer"><figure><a class="image-lk image2" target="_blank" href=" data-ponent-name="Image2ToDOM" rel="nofollow ugc noopener"><div class="image2-set"><picture><source type="image/webp" srcset=" 424w, 848w, 1272w, 1456w" siz="100vw" /><img src=" width="408" height="229.5" data-attrs="{"src":" of a Venmo transactn between two random people wh the note \"*rabow emoji* Love is love, proud of you\"","tle":null,"type":"image/eg","href":null,"belowTheFold":false,"topImage":false,"ternalRedirect":null}" class="sizg-normal" alt="Screenshot of a Venmo transactn between two random people wh the note "*rabow emoji* Love is love, proud of you"" tle="Screenshot of a Venmo transactn between two random people wh the note "*rabow emoji* Love is love, proud of you"" srcset=" 424w, 848w, 1272w, 1456w" siz="100vw" /></picture><div></div></div></a><figptn class="image-ptn">Reprentatn is so important</figptn></figure></div><p><span>One of my favore li to tell is that I don’t have a Venmo. I like the ia of not havg a Venmo, but I dislike the ia of owg someone money more, and sometim you need one to make sure that don’t happen </span><strong>(Butch +1)</strong><span>.</span></p><p><span>Usually people jt accept my lie, which is funny bee my Venmo is jt my ernment name and you uld probably fd pretty easily if you tried. My picture is an illtratn of the New York Public Library ln, which don’t exactly intify as me, but certaly don’t le out that </span><em>uld</em><span> be me, so who knows. I changed to that bee I once got a text sayg “Can you change your Venmo picture to somethg of you not lickg someone else’s neck?” Which at the time was a fair requt </span><strong>(Drama +1)</strong><span>.</span></p><p>I thk Venmo is about the furtht thg om anythg hot, so stctively I want to ll straight. I won’t get to a bate if gay or straight people are cheaper, but I will say that sometim there is this eakish transactnal energy a group of straight people where you n tell that every sgle thg is beg acunted for, and personally, I’d much rather be around gay people creatg new and excg and false fns of mutual aid than that. Recently I went to a straight dner party where I texted the host “What should I brg?” and then at the same time as I sent “Don’t say nothg” she actually sent a list of thgs to brg, which, I’m not sure why, felt really straight to me.</p><p>Before we get to , let’s discs some thgs that are hotter than any nversatn volvg the word Venmo:</p><ol><li><p><span>“I got ” </span><strong>(hot)</strong></p></li><li><p><span>“I already got ” </span><strong>(sneaky)</strong></p></li><li><p><span>“Your money’s no good here” </span><strong>(funny)</strong></p></li><li><p><span>“Stop” </span><strong>(not a sry way)</strong></p></li><li><p><span>*Prsg a bill to someone’s hand* </span><strong>(maybe a sry way but also hot)</strong></p><p></p></li></ol><p>Even liars are hont sometim, so I’ll adm that I do thk a lot of straight thgs are hot, and so will also give Venmo s due diligence as a gay and Not Hot enty. When I look at my very existent Venmo—’s actually the clost thg I have to a ltle black book asi om my Tupperware llectn (Sorry, really jt never feels like the right time to return)—some hol form my theory. </p><div class="ptned-image-ntaer"><figure><a class="image-lk image2" target="_blank" href=" data-ponent-name="Image2ToDOM" rel="nofollow ugc noopener"><div class="image2-set"><picture><source type="image/webp" srcset=" 424w, 848w, 1272w, 1456w" siz="100vw" /><img src=" width="472" height="179.53374233128835" data-attrs="{"src":" om @OGYoungFella that says \"I hate venmo this sh gay\"","tle":null,"type":"image/png","href":null,"belowTheFold":te,"topImage":false,"ternalRedirect":null}" class="sizg-normal" alt="Tweet om @OGYoungFella that says "I hate venmo this sh gay"" tle="Tweet om @OGYoungFella that says "I hate venmo this sh gay"" srcset=" 424w, 848w, 1272w, 1456w" siz="100vw" loadg="lazy" /></picture><div></div></div></a></figure></div><p><span>I fd a lot of treats scrollg down this memory lane: two transactns wh “Venmo User” which I know are both separate people who have blocked me </span><strong>(+2 Drama)</strong><span>, an early flirtg style which I jt sent immediately back anythg I received </span><strong>(+1 Stupid)</strong><span>, and some really nice evince om what appears to be a fight about money which $750 was angrily passed back and forth gused kept </span><strong>(+3 Dramatic and Stupid)</strong><span>. </span></p><p><span>It’s not terribly surprisg that my Venmo scrollg got me thkg about all of my failur of the heart </span><strong>(+2 Yearn)</strong><span>. I always have this silly ltle ia that if I had lived the 1980s or somethg, heartbreak like this jt wouldn’t exist. It’s silly, but nice, to image not havg to see that you’ve been rced to a “Venmo User,” or not havg to be absolutely sure you are on private to avoid a fight </span><strong>(+1 Secrecy)</strong><span>, or really to jt be able to avoid any of the var other phone-based mefields that n hurt your feelgs. It’s silly, but don’t help my fantasy to read somethg om that era about dyk about town New York, only wantg to do good work, have good sex, and make meangful iends. It’s silly, but do really make me feel like I uld stop snifflg over my Venmo, be a dyke about town, and jt go treat someone to a drk.</span></p><div><hr /></div><p>To really ci if somethg is gay or straight I need to ask Sarah, who is the bt at beg straight and the bt at immediately offerg unwaverg opns. She clar Venmo as straight and provis our most pellg evince:</p><ul><li><p><span>Nothg more straight than feelg someone ow you somethg </span><strong>(+1)</strong></p></li><li><p><span>Nothg more straight than exact change </span><strong>(+1)</strong></p></li><li><p><span>Nothg more straight than beg lked to a bank </span><strong>(+2)</strong></p></li><li><p><span>Venmo would have said no homo 2010 </span><strong>(+5)</strong></p></li></ul><p><span>As always, I fd her put geni and te, but that don’t mean I’ll listen to . It looks like the numbers are backg me up—Venmo might actually be gay. The sire to acunt for, or owe, or break even is fely annoyg </span><strong>(straight)</strong><span>, but maybe Venmo is jt our sad ltle necsy for slidg slimy pk dollars back and forth.</span></p><p><span>I know that I’m a lot of annoyg thgs but I hope beg cheap is never one of them. I thk bee I loved beg butch before I loved beg a dyke, treatg people will always be an important part of my fantasy of myself. Venmog me dispts that, and remds me that I n owe people too, bee of urse we all owe each other a lot </span><strong>(+1 Earnt)</strong><span>. I try to re about dog good work but a lot of the time, I really thk the only reason to make money is to walk to the bar and do a ltle hand wave and say “I got .”</span></p><p>Anyways, I want to end wh this bee I fd pretty damng: </p><div class="ptned-image-ntaer"><figure><a class="image-lk image2" target="_blank" href=" data-ponent-name="Image2ToDOM" rel="nofollow ugc noopener"><div class="image2-set"><picture><source type="image/webp" srcset=" 424w, 848w, 1272w, 1456w" siz="100vw" /><img src=" width="516" height="154.45484949832775" data-attrs="{"src":" om Venmo that says, \"Srps, what is your favore Venmo feature and why is the remd button?\"","tle":null,"type":null,"href":null,"belowTheFold":te,"topImage":false,"ternalRedirect":null}" class="sizg-normal" alt="Tweet om Venmo that says, "Srps, what is your favore Venmo feature and why is the remd button?"" tle="Tweet om Venmo that says, "Srps, what is your favore Venmo feature and why is the remd button?"" srcset=" 424w, 848w, 1272w, 1456w" siz="100vw" loadg="lazy" /></picture><div></div></div></a></figure></div><div><hr /></div><p><strong>Alyse:</strong><span> I spend money like I have money, bee I’ve never had money and sentially I don’t re much about money. One of my favore thgs to do is buy thgs for betiful women. I also love to get tipsy at the bar and tell near strangers to “put on my tab.” Ey is the same way, and this is why we are absolutely monstro together.</span></p><p>When my iend Preterra wants to jtify spendg an exorbant amount of money on somethg, she holds out ont of her, squts her ey and says, “whoa, now this is a lifepiece,” meang of urse that is valuable, that might even be vlent to prive herself of . It’s now my trick too. It’s amazg how an stant you n create an entire ia of a  life around somethg you sire.</p><p>This isn’t my say, but I’d argue that Venmo is neher straight nor gay, ’s jt a fancial app. However, seems extremely gay to spend time thkg about Venmo, the ltle payments you need to send, and all the ltle payments you have sent. Why do this feel gay? Well, ’s Melanie’s job to expla, but I’ll jt say this—I’m always thkg about how my love life is archived. Payments back and forth to lovers prent & past rri wh them entirely too gay a weight. Like most gays, I spend a lot of time feelg nostalgic, feelg weepy at what was or what uld have been. </p><p>I wrote an say once lled “Spltg the Bill,” about my last relatnship and how the fal act of our life together volved wrg out a ledger of who owed whom what & who would get what the divorce. If owg somethg to someone else (potentially for the rt of your life) feels gay (and I’d argue is gay,) then vtg thgs knowg full well you’ll probably lose them feels exponentially gayer. </p><p>I don’t really know if ’s gay or straight to spl a bill. If I had to choose, though, I’d say ’s straight to spl the bill. My arguments are probably a ltle heterophobic, and fely simplistic, but my fn of queerns requir me to give jt a ltle b more than I might be fortable wh, to emote embarrassgly (and often publicly,) to pay out my ass movg fe so I n keep the vtage uch we once watched TV on, to keep the love not om my high school girliend for the rt of my life, to re more about fun than I do about bt, and most importantly to buy thgs for hot women. </p><div class="ptned-image-ntaer"><figure><a class="image-lk is-viewable-img image2" target="_blank" href=" data-ponent-name="Image2ToDOM" rel="nofollow ugc noopener"><div class="image2-set"><picture><source type="image/webp" srcset=" 424w, 848w, 1272w, 1456w" siz="100vw" /><img src=" width="294" height="392.2951807228916" data-attrs="{"src":"" class="sizg-normal" alt srcset=" 424w, 848w, 1272w, 1456w" siz="100vw" loadg="lazy" /></picture><div class="image-lk-expand"><svg xmlns=" width="16" height="16" viewBox="0 0 24 24" fill="none" stroke="#FFFFFF" stroke-width="2" stroke-lep="round" stroke-lejo="round" class="luci luci-maximize2"><polyle pots="15 3 21 3 21 9"></polyle><polyle pots="9 21 3 21 3 15"></polyle><le x1="21" x2="14" y1="3" y2="10"></le><le x1="3" x2="10" y1="21" y2="14"></le></svg></div></div></a><figptn class="image-ptn"></figptn></figure></div><p><strong>Ey:</strong><span> When I first ed Venmo, towards the end of llege, I assumed was a dg aler app bee the only person I knew who ed was the iend who sold me dgs. His bs put a sizable chunk of the mp onto Venmo, until the app ngratulated him wh a special badge for beg one of s top ers, and, unrstandably eaked out, he reentered the sh enomy. Money is always a beady enavor, but we ually keep private, treatg bank balanc like we would a medil rerd or a diary. But at some ccial juncture, Venmo’s velopers cid to do somethg different. They ma everyone’s transactns public by flt. I n log on to Venmo and see wh sends that the fifth cutt guy om my high school has requted money om a stranger wh the note “ayooooooo”.</span></p><p><span>Surely, the Venmo team had endls foc groups about this cisn: </span><em>Why would we make this a feature of our app? What purpose would that possibly serve? Aren’t transactns supposed to be furtive, private, almost sheepish? Isn’t the pot of Venmo to obfte, not magnify, the the awkwardns of bills changg hands over a dner table?</em><span> </span></p><p>Clearly, they doggedly wanted Venmo to have a social dimensn, and sce then, has bee one of my favore social media apps. You n swch all your Venmo transactns to be private by flt—I certaly have—but few people seem to know you n do this, or maybe they don’t re, so the feed lays bare who’s cheap, who’s rponsible for the utili, who’s datg and breakg up.</p><p><span>In my last relatnship, we ed Venmo a lot. As a grad stunt, I didn’t make much money, and she ma ls, so we’d Venmo each other nstantly for small amounts: she’d send me money for the McChicken I bought her on a Wednday night </span><strong>(pansexual)</strong><span> and the 2x4s I picked up at the Home Depot on Thursday </span><strong>(gay)</strong><span>, and then I’d Venmo her back for the ter bill and we’d ntue like this, years and the same $25 passg elsly between . Neher of were que yet built for relatnships, their mutual, wobblg bt. As a dog returns to his vom, so a fool repeats his folly. Venmo was the vom.</span></p><div><hr /></div><p>NOW LISTENING:</p><iame class="spotify-wrap playlist" data-attrs="{"image":" Key","subtle":"Tems","scriptn":"fiig by Sodom","url":"" src=" ameborr="0" gture="media" allowfullscreen="te" allow="encrypted-media" loadg="lazy" data-ponent-name="Spotify2ToDOM"></iame></div></div><div class="visibily-check"></div><div class="post-footer"><div class="pencraft ontend-pencraft-Box-module__flexGrow--mx4xz ontend-pencraft-Box-module__ret--VfQY8 ontend-pencraft-Box-module__display-flex--ZqeZt ontend-pencraft-Box-module__flex-jtify-space-between--NvIcg ontend-pencraft-Box-module__flex-align-center--rSd6h ontend-pencraft-Box-module__flex-gap-16--TpblU ontend-pencraft-Box-module__paddg-y-16--ohCEm ontend-pencraft-Box-module__borr-top-tail-themed--e17yZ ontend-pencraft-Box-module__borr-bottom-tail-themed--eVwFY post-ufi"><div class="pencraft ontend-pencraft-Box-module__ret--VfQY8 ontend-pencraft-Box-module__display-flex--ZqeZt ontend-pencraft-Box-module__flex-gap-8--HFpIK"><div class="like-button-ntaer post-ufi-button style-button"><a role="button" class="post-ufi-button style-button has-label wh-borr"><svg role="img" style="height: 20px; width: 20px;" width="20" height="20" viewBox="0 0 24 24" fill="#000000" stroke-width="2" stroke="#000" xmlns=" class="in"><g><tle></tle><svg xmlns=" width="24" height="24" viewBox="0 0 24 24" stroke-width="2" stroke-lep="round" stroke-lejo="round" class="luci luci-heart"><path d="M19 14c1.49-1.46 3-3.21 3-5.5A5.5 5.5 0 0 0 16.5 3c-1.76 0-3 .5-4.5 2-1.5-1.5-2.74-2-4.5-2A5.5 5.5 0 0 0 2 8.5c0 2.3 1.5 4.05 3 5.5l7 7Z"></path></svg></g></svg><div class="label">1</div></a><div ert role="dialog" class="modal typography out gone share-dialog popup"><div class="modal-table"><div class="modal-row"><div class="modal-cell modal-ntent no-fullscreen"><div class="ntaer"><button tabInx="0" type="button" data-ttid="close-modal" class="pencraft modal-btn modal-ex-btn no-marg ontend-pencraft-Button-module__inButton--xpBoH ontend-pencraft-Button-module__buttonBase--T0hXz ontend-pencraft-Button-module__size_40--RASvV ontend-pencraft-Button-module__prry_sendary--UEXV6 ontend-pencraft-Button-module__fill_empty--OPYgN ontend-pencraft-Button-module__round--D6jfD"><svg xmlns=" width="20" height="20" viewBox="0 0 24 24" fill="none" stroke="sendary" stroke-width="2" stroke-lep="round" stroke-lejo="round" class="luci luci-x"><le x1="18" x2="6" y1="6" y2="18"></le><le x1="6" x2="18" y1="6" y2="18"></le></svg></button><div class="share-dialog-tle">Share this post</div><div class="pencraft ontend-pencraft-Box-module__ret--VfQY8 ontend-pencraft-Box-module__display-flex--ZqeZt ontend-pencraft-Box-module__flex-directn-lumn--Rq7pk ontend-pencraft-Box-module__flex-gap-32--uRr14 ontend-pencraft-Box-module__paddg-x-24--ViY5j ontend-pencraft-Box-module__paddg-top-32--hE9Ly ontend-pencraft-Box-module__paddg-bottom-48--OND"><div class="pencraft ontend-pencraft-Box-module__ret--VfQY8 ontend-pencraft-Box-module__display-flex--ZqeZt ontend-pencraft-Box-module__paddg-8--wF5Sz ontend-pencraft-Box-module__borr-tail--MiH57 ontend-pencraft-Box-module__borr-radi-12--AmQy9 social-preview-box post"><div class="social-image-box"><picture><source type="image/webp" srcset=" /><img src=" siz="100vw" alt loadg="lazy" width="120" class="ontend-ponents-rponsive_img-module__img--Pgjj2 social-image" /></picture></div><div class="pencraft ontend-pencraft-Box-module__ret--VfQY8 ontend-pencraft-Box-module__display-flex--ZqeZt ontend-pencraft-Box-module__flex-directn-lumn--Rq7pk ontend-pencraft-Box-module__paddg-y-8--exiCC ontend-pencraft-Box-module__paddg-left-12--eE6bp"><h4 class="pencraft ontend-pencraft-Box-module__ret--VfQY8 ontend-pencraft-Text-module__size-16--fFowu ontend-pencraft-Text-module__le-height-20--p0dP8 ontend-pencraft-Text-module__weight-bold--Ps9DB ontend-pencraft-Text-module__font-text--QmNJR ontend-pencraft-Text-module__lor-primary--ud4Z0 ontend-pencraft-Text-module__ret--dW0zZ">Fellas, Is It Gay? 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