Support for Parents of Child Who Says He's Gay - Foc on the Fay

Contents:

• A CHRISTIAN PERSPECTIVE ON PARENTG A GAY CHILD
• HOW SHOULD CHRISTIAN PARENTS RPOND IF ONE OF THEIR CHILDREN OUT AS GAY?
• “MOM, DAD… I’M GAY.” A CHRISTIAN PARENT’S RPONSE
• RPONDG LOVE TO AN ADULT GAY CHILD
• I TRIED TO STOP MY SON OM BEG GAY. HERE’S WHAT I WISH I HAD KNOWN
• WHEN MY DGHTER SAID, 'I'M GAY'
• HOW CHRISTIAN PARENTS SHOULD RPOND TO THEIR CHILD'S GAY INTY CRISIS
• HOW CAN CHRISTIAN PARENTS RPOND TO THEIR GAY CHILD?
• MY SON IS GAY
• RPONDG TO A “GAY CHRISTIAN” THE FAY
• SUPPORT FOR PARENTS OF CHILD WHO SAYS HE’S GAY

A CHRISTIAN PERSPECTIVE ON PARENTG A GAY CHILD

For a now, Christian parents have been askg my wife and me for help parentg their gay kids. As a Christian dad of a gay son, I wish there had been someone to talk me through the issu raised by my son’s disclosure of his sexualy. But the evangelil church has until very recently said very ltle about homosexualy, except that is a s and that those who practice are worthy of nmnatn.

As a rult, most gay young people the church stayed silent about their sexualy until they uld no longer ignore .

HOW SHOULD CHRISTIAN PARENTS RPOND IF ONE OF THEIR CHILDREN OUT AS GAY?

Most parents, if they knew their kid was gay, told no one about and had no one to talk to. In orr to love the fai and their gay kids well, the church needs to do a better mol to parents.

(We’ve wrten extensively about this journey our book, Space at the Table: Conversatns Between an Evangelil Theologian and his Gay Son. My rpons here are directed specifilly to parents of gay kids, not to the kids themselv. I should add, too, that I am only speakg om my own experience as a parent of a gay kid, not speakg on behalf of all parents of LGBT+ kids.

“MOM, DAD… I’M GAY.” A CHRISTIAN PARENT’S RPONSE

*To ntue readg, click the lk below to download a ee py of "A Christian Perspective on Parentg a Gay Child" by Dr. If a child reveals his or her homosexualy, the first thg for Christian parents to do is let their child know that, no matter what, love and grace will w the day.

RPONDG LOVE TO AN ADULT GAY CHILD

Parents should also enurage a child who has “e out” not to fe himself as a “homosexual. Parents n e alongsi a stgglg child and help him see that he is not “gay” simply bee he has homosexual thoughts. Rather, he is stgglg wh homosexual sir or same-sex attractn.

The difference between stgglg wh homosexualy and intifyg onelf as gay may seem subtle, but is a huge distctn, and here’s why. God never created to be homosexual.

Christians may stggle wh same-sex attractn, but that do not make them homosexuals. Y, homosexualy is sful, but not to a level above that of heterosexual lt or lyg or pri. And the Bible says that homosexualy is unter to God’s tend purpose for human begs.

I TRIED TO STOP MY SON OM BEG GAY. HERE’S WHAT I WISH I HAD KNOWN

If a child says, “I am homosexual.

WHEN MY DGHTER SAID, 'I'M GAY'

How should Christian parents rpond if one of their children out as gay?

Your child is gay. But for many Christian parents, nothg n prepare them to hear that their beloved child is gay.

If you are a Christian parent, fay member or iend to whom your loved one has e out as gay or lbian, then this is for you. They did not “choose gayns” to rebel agast you, get back at you or make your life miserable. As a younger Christian, tght that homosexualy is a s, I believed that trma somewhere someone’s past ed homosexualy, even if they didn’t remember .

HOW CHRISTIAN PARENTS SHOULD RPOND TO THEIR CHILD'S GAY INTY CRISIS

To my surprise, God pletely shifted my unrstandg and revealed to me the many people who had a great childhood are still gay.

HOW CAN CHRISTIAN PARENTS RPOND TO THEIR GAY CHILD?

Some gay teens have been shamed, banished, threatened, beaten, and shunned. If dog the thgs meant that homosexualy would not vis a Christian home, then we wouldn’t see croppg up so often.

MY SON IS GAY

But please unrstand that even if we disagree, nothg chang regardg our rponsibily, our blsg as a Mom or a Dad to unndnally love, accept and affirm our gay children – as God has done wh .

Rachel Held Evans nclus her blog post If my son or dghter were gay wh this paragraph:. If God bls Dan and me wh a child who is gay, I would want that child to know whout a doubt that he or she is loved unndnally. I believe Rachel’s motivatn is to create a more welg and lovg environment the church for those who intify themselv as homosexuals, or who stggle wh homosexual sire.

I admire and agree wh her motive, and mt say that I’ve learned om her this area of beg much more reful how I speak and wre about homosexualy.

RPONDG TO A “GAY CHRISTIAN” THE FAY

First, she don’t munite any ncern about the sfulns of homosexual sir nor the immoraly of homosexual actns. She seems to nvey that homosexual sir are not part of human brokenns, and that to pursue homosexual practic do not have any bearg on a person’s relatnship wh Christ.

” There is no ditn that she se anythg wrong or unbiblil about homosexualy. Send, Rachel seems to intify everyone who tak the view that homosexual sir are part of broken human sfulns, and that homosexual actns are s, as bulli. However, ’s irrponsible and unfair to group all who say that homosexualy is immoral as bulli of Christ’s ltle on.

What do you mean by “I thk I’m gay”? Are you therefore planng to pursue homosexual relatnships?

SUPPORT FOR PARENTS OF CHILD WHO SAYS HE’S GAY

Sixth, if your son agre that homosexualy is sful, and he wants to have victory over the temptatns, then there are many Gospel promis you n enurage him wh. However, if he says that he believ homosexualy to be okay and he’s cid to pursue , then while assurg him of your ntued love and re, you mt lovgly warn him of the spirual and physil dangers of homosexualy. Seventh, I’d enurage the son not to see himself as a homosexual, not to fe himself by his sexualy.