"I Realized I Was Gay": Men Who Came Out Later In Life Are Sharg What It Was Like For Them To Reveal That Tth And Live Authentilly

Contents:

• GAY MEN AND AGG
• GLA40
• GAY LIFE AFTER 40
• GAY RETIREMENT & THE BABY BOOMER GENERATN
• "I REALIZED I WAS GAY": MEN WHO CAME OUT LATER IN LIFE ARE SHARG WHAT IT WAS LIKE FOR THEM TO REVEAL THAT TTH AND LIVE AUTHENTILLY
• GAY PEOPLE WHO E OUT LATER LIFE FACE UNIQUE OBSTACL
• THE GAY MAN'S GUI TO DATG AFTER 50
• TOM HOLLAND’S GAY SEX SCENE SETS SOCIAL MEDIA ALIGHT AFTER THE ACTOR SAID PLAYG THE ROLE ‘BROKE HIM’

GAY MEN AND AGG

My stat the gay guy world had changed, and that was jt how was gog to be. Where was the show that I uld intify wh, the one about gay men their 40s still tryg to figure out life and s twists and turns, ups and downs, surpris and disappotments? I uldn't fd anythg alg wh issu to which I uld then I thought about all of my 40-somethg gay iends and how they all led very different liv om me and each other's as well.

So, along wh my wrg partner John Sobrack (a fellow gay filmmaker, married and his 40s), I created The New 30 -- a digal seri about a group of diverse gay iends navigatg their 40s and disverg that life isn't nearly what they imaged would be at that age.

GLA40

It explor some of the real issu of beg gay and your 40s, such as erectile dysfunctn, tergeneratnal and terracial datg, baby adoptn, open marriag, adaptg to technology, physil challeng of agg, alg wh the past, planng for the future, and havg to start over, to name a few -- all handled serly and dramatilly but wh a touch of humor. I've learned 's OK to be gay and your 40s and not have your life all figured out.

GAY LIFE AFTER 40

The gay culture is unfivg of agg. Many gay men will have endured homophobic bullyg at school whilst teachers turned a bld eye; havg parents not unrstandg or acceptg their sexual orientatn; or a difficult and paful g out procs.

In the here and now, there is still much homophobia our society: beg looked at an timidatg or shamg way when holdg their same-sex partner’s hand the streets; hearg homophobic people makg plats when gay characters appear on televisn; beg asked appropriate sexual qutns at a party that would never be asked to a heterosexual person; havg to refully select a holiday statn that is gay-iendly. This is what we ll "mory strs, " the chronic strs that occurs every day for beg gay a heterosexual world. As a rult, gay men (and others the LGBTQ muni) have to velop a shield to protect themselv.

GAY RETIREMENT & THE BABY BOOMER GENERATN

One way that gay men n create a sense of safety and protect themselv agast more woundg is by feelg wanted and sexually sired, which wh lookg perfect, showg no signs of vulnerabili and beg young. For gay men, for some reason, 40 years of age seems to be the thrhold when gay men flip om beg sirable and sexy to beg visible and even sometim an object of disgt. Watchg the Channel 4 seri It’s A S remd me that we didn’t get the chance to see gay men agg when we were growg up bee many of them died their 20s durg the AIDS epimic.

"I REALIZED I WAS GAY": MEN WHO CAME OUT LATER IN LIFE ARE SHARG WHAT IT WAS LIKE FOR THEM TO REVEAL THAT TTH AND LIVE AUTHENTILLY

The gay male populatn is missg a generatn of olr men who uld have been mentors and teachers offerg guidance this homophobic world. Wh the absence of the olr wisdom the gay muny, youth beme the only safety: As long as one is young and betiful, they will be sired and therefore they won’t be alone.

The gay scene rpond to that by sexualisg youth and perfect bodi, whilst nigratg agg. The dilemma is that most gay men want to nnect and love each other, but they’re also havg trouble nnectg bee genue timacy requir the willgns to be vulnerable.

GAY PEOPLE WHO E OUT LATER LIFE FACE UNIQUE OBSTACL

The dark si of this is that we are leavg behd the agg gay men who survived homophobic trma, the AIDS epimic, and those who fought for the equal rights that we are enjoyg today. Gay men simply don’t have a mol of what the path of agg looks like.

THE GAY MAN'S GUI TO DATG AFTER 50

We only see young gay men partyg, havg sex, or sual relatnships. Many gay men still rry ternalised homo-negativy wh the subnsc re belief that is impossible for gay men to love one another, feelg unservg of love.

TOM HOLLAND’S GAY SEX SCENE SETS SOCIAL MEDIA ALIGHT AFTER THE ACTOR SAID PLAYG THE ROLE ‘BROKE HIM’

Yet, there are many gay men strong and lovg relatnships, monogamo on and polyamoro on, livg their liv like everybody else.

They are many agg gay men who have much wisdom to give to their younger peers. It is time to work together to shift the gay culture om the one beg cril of agg to more human nnectns, where we n embrace each other, bee, after all, we all belong to the same fay, the LGBTQ fay — the Rabow Fay.