Gay Kids Comg Out Younger, But Parents Ask "How Do You Know?"

Contents:

• GAY KIDS COMG OUT YOUNGER, BUT PARENTS ASK "HOW DO YOU KNOW?"
• THE CHILDREN OF GAY PARENTS SPEAK FOR THEMSELV
• IS YOUR CHILD GAY?
• GAY BOYS

GAY KIDS COMG OUT YOUNGER, BUT PARENTS ASK "HOW DO YOU KNOW?"

My son is gay, but he is also 9, so he is not the "ltful ckmonster" (thank you for that turn of phrase, Chris Kluwe) that so many homophob try to pat all gay people as. And another word on your ternal monologue: My unfortablens has nothg to do wh him beg gay.

But as much as I thought was adorable, I also dread moments like the, bee as the father of a gay child, the only thg that really worri me is other people's potential reactns to him: Will he say or do the wrong thg to the wrong person? He will be enterg the highly macho world of high school soon enough, and that is not always a safe place for gay kids to be. But luckily, I didn't have to worry what this high-school boy might thk, sce I know that my -laws and niec have a "no homophob allowed" policy when to their iends.

For my son, unlike how 's been for so many who have e before him, beg gay is not somethg to al wh but somethg that is, like his beg tall or havg giant feet. He don't thk of his "gay issu"; he jt knows what he lik, and now he is actg on . Too many gay kids n't act on their feelgs until they move away om home and to real life, or at least to llege.

THE CHILDREN OF GAY PARENTS SPEAK FOR THEMSELV

We already knew She-Ra was queer AF, but seeg two lovg, openly gay parents on a popular animated show ma our hearts swell! "As a gay man who grew up wh no visible role mols of gay relatnships my muny or entertament ntent, I am grateful that this reprentatn is happeng on Nickeloon, moved by the difference that is surely makg the mds and hearts of children, and grateful to have been a part of this slow but important change, " Dickie told PRIDE.

Gay kids are g out earlier — sometim middle school — and many are fdg acceptance. Enuraggly, beg young and openly gay seems to be gettg easier. Denizet-Lewis wr that when he started workg for the gay men's magaze XY 1998, "we received dozens of letters each week om teenagers the pths of spair.

" Three years later, he says, "a new kd of gay adolcent was appearg on the page - proud, rilient, sometim even happy. " He explas, That's not to say that gay teenagers didn't still suffer harassment at school or rejectn at home, but many seemed ls burned wh shame and self-loathg than their olr gay peers.

IS YOUR CHILD GAY?

Not only were there creasgly accurate and posive portrayals of gays and lbians popular culture, but most teenagers were by then regular Inter ers. Gog onle broke through the isolatn that had been a hallmark of beg young and gay, and allowed gay teenagers to fd rmatn to refute what their fai or church sometim still told them - namely, that they would never fd happs and to the Inter and to creasg cultural acceptance of homosexualy (an crease marred, we should note, by measur like Proposn 8), kids who might once have waed until high school or even llege to e out are now dog so earlier. At least 120 middle schools the untry have gay-straight alliance groups, and others let stunts observe the natnal Day of Silence prott agast anti-gay harassment.

" They were not, however, silent: "Good luck gettg middle-schoolers not to talk, " the school unselor youth of the Webster kids and other gay middle-schoolers is a sign of how far gay rights have e — but 's also the kids' biggt obstacle to acceptance. A tellg anecdote om Nadia, the mom of a gay 15-year-old named At. " But she had actually asked At if he was gay when she found out he had lled a gay chat le.

The irony of a parent spectg her kid is gay and then refg to believe he uld know his own orientatn highlights how much more difficulty some parents have wh burgeong gay sexualy than they would wh a straight kid's of this may have to do wh the misnceptn that you have to have gay terurse to be gay, or that homosexualy is somehow a more "sexual" orientatn than heterosexualy.

GAY BOYS

'Eileen Ross, director of a Mounta View, CA program for gay youth, says that when a 12-year-old boy says he lik girls, "No one says to them: 'Are you sure? A lawyer Florida argued that gay-straight allianc promote the "premature sexualizatn of the stunts, " and when At started a gay-straight alliance, his Michigan school ma him ll somethg "ls ntroversial" (he chose "Peace Alliance"). Denizet-Lewis reports the hopeful words of velopmental psychologist Rch Sav-Williams: "This is the first generatn of gay kids who have the great joy of beg able to argue wh their parents about datg, jt like their straight peers do.

And maybe today's gay kids are slowly startg to receive via New York Tim Out In Middle School [NYT Magaze]. “My mom is gay, ” she explaed.