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Article on changg scene Hamptons, where young, gay party crowd has given way to more staid socializg as area's gay populatn grows olr, richer and more upled-up; photos (M)

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A CHANGE OF LIFE THE GAY HAMPTONS

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The party was a $90-a-person fund-raiser for New York Cy's Lbian, Gay, Bisexual and Transgenr Communy Center, held at the home of Bce Anrson and Ken Kuch, which was draped a rabow-striped Gay Pri fund-raiser, s third year, attracted 750 guts, far more than the past, no small part bee was jt steps om Two Mile Hollow Beach, where on the eveng of June 13 two men were arrted for havg oral sex. It was a highly publicized cint at a longtime gay beach. Many gay Hampton, while acknowledgg the illegaly, viewed the arrts as a form of harassment, prompted by prsure om a lol homeowner's associatn.

Ined, the anizers of the fund-raiser said they nsired the large, joyo turnout a symbolic many ways the mostly male party -- and the beach cint and pickup scene themselv -- are anachronisms, remiscent of an earlier era when the Hamptons were a statn for many gay sgl their 20's, who easily met at bars like the Swamp. Today there is no gay bar anywhere between Southampton and Montk, and the gay Hamptons have bee a staid place where people socialize over dner and talk of kchen renovatns and children's play dat. The area's gay populatn has grown olr, richer and more upled-up.

Marto, 59, a eelance art director, live full time , another uple, Mark Field, 42, and Greg Ventra, 40, his partner of 15 years, said they have grown bored by the lack of a scene the Hamptons and now prefer to vatn plac like Ibiza and South Beach where there is a public gay scene. -Tropez, for example, there are gay beach clubs known for their theme parti that provi a sense of excement and where people spend the whole day.

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''It's lost s appeal now that there aren't really many younger gay people. ''The cle the young sgle gay populatn trac most obvly to soarg real tate pric, which have phed a summer share a group hoe om $2, 000 the mid-80's to around $10, 000 today. ''I don't need a gay bar anymore, '' said Mr.

''Two proment real tate brokers nfirmed the trend of home ownership by gay upl. ''This is a fairly affluent area, and for a long time two men wh high salari and wh no pennts were better able to afford hom than anyone else, '' said Diane Saatchi, print of Epste, owner of Devl McNiff Real Estate East Hampton, said about 25 percent of his clients are gay men and women, and the proportn has creased the last five years. ''While some lament the absence of the kd of gay bars that would ter to a young clientele, most regnize that the scene has changed so much there is ltle mand for one.

''What the Hamptons needs is an -your-face, gay-style gay nightclub, but people are too old for , '' said Steven Ga, a longtime gay Hamptone and thor of ''Philist at the Hedgerow, '' a social history of the Hamptons. ''''That's how is for New York gay men: You sow your wild oats out on Fire Island, and you grow up and graduate to the Hamptons, '' he add. ''Tom Kirdahy, -chairman of the East End Gay Organizatn, said: ''The lbian and gay muny the Hamptons, which is a huge muny, is largely 40 and above, double-e and well ted.

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''''Sure, some people are hungerg for a gay club, '' he add, ''but for many people 's not about beg on the dance floor till 4 the morng anymore.

''Though women make up a large part of the Hamptons gay populatn, much of the gay beach and bar bate has been among men, bee they are the on more likely to patronize those settgs, Mr. In the late 70's, longtime rints rell, there were at least three gay bars on Montk Highway: Out of this World, the Attic, and the Swamp.

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