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Article on changg scene Hamptons, where young, gay party crowd has given way to more staid socializg as area's gay populatn grows olr, richer and more upled-up; photos (M)

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A CHANGE OF LIFE THE GAY HAMPTONS

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The party was a $90-a-person fund-raiser for New York Cy's Lbian, Gay, Bisexual and Transgenr Communy Center, held at the home of Bce Anrson and Ken Kuch, which was draped a rabow-striped Gay Pri fund-raiser, s third year, attracted 750 guts, far more than the past, no small part bee was jt steps om Two Mile Hollow Beach, where on the eveng of June 13 two men were arrted for havg oral sex. It was a highly publicized cint at a longtime gay beach.

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Many gay Hampton, while acknowledgg the illegaly, viewed the arrts as a form of harassment, prompted by prsure om a lol homeowner's associatn. Ined, the anizers of the fund-raiser said they nsired the large, joyo turnout a symbolic many ways the mostly male party -- and the beach cint and pickup scene themselv -- are anachronisms, remiscent of an earlier era when the Hamptons were a statn for many gay sgl their 20's, who easily met at bars like the Swamp. Today there is no gay bar anywhere between Southampton and Montk, and the gay Hamptons have bee a staid place where people socialize over dner and talk of kchen renovatns and children's play dat.

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The area's gay populatn has grown olr, richer and more upled-up. Marto, 59, a eelance art director, live full time , another uple, Mark Field, 42, and Greg Ventra, 40, his partner of 15 years, said they have grown bored by the lack of a scene the Hamptons and now prefer to vatn plac like Ibiza and South Beach where there is a public gay scene.

-Tropez, for example, there are gay beach clubs known for their theme parti that provi a sense of excement and where people spend the whole day. ''It's lost s appeal now that there aren't really many younger gay people.

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