Why Straight Women Are Attracted to Gay Men | Psychology Today New Zealand

Contents:

• WHY STRAIGHT WOMEN AND GAY MEN ARE OFTEN SO CLOSE
• STRAIGHT WOMEN AND THEIR GAY HBANDS
• IS MY HBAND GAY? SIGNS OF A GAY HBAND
• WHEN GAY MEN (MIS)MARRY STRAIGHT WOMEN: BONNIE KAYE'S STORY
• WHY STRAIGHT WOMEN ARE ATTRACTED TO GAY MEN
• I’M A STRAIGHT WOMAN WHO MARRIED A GAY MAN

WHY STRAIGHT WOMEN AND GAY MEN ARE OFTEN SO CLOSE

Now a new psychology study has provid evince that gay men and straight women are the perfect iends wh benefs – as long as the benefs have to do wh tstworthy relatnship advice.

“I was terted the evolutnary perspective as to why gay men and straight women form close iendships, ” says Eric Rsell, a visg psychology rearcher at the Universy of Texas At and lead thor of the study, published the latt issue of Evolutnary Psychology. Rsell wonred if had somethg to do wh the exchange of matg advice sce gay men and straight women aren’t romantic partners or matg petn and were “uniquely posned to exchange tstworthy rmatn. ”To tt his hypothis, Rsell enlisted the help of 88 straight women and 58 gay men, all unrgrads om the Texas ChristianUniversy, and nducted two one, straight women were prented wh a scenar volvg a party, a iend who bags out at the last mute and a substute “date” named Jordan.

STRAIGHT WOMEN AND THEIR GAY HBANDS

Rearchers asked the women to look up a Facebook profile for Jordan -- who was prented as eher a straight woman, a straight man or a gay man – and then answer a seri of qutns. In the send study, gay men were prented wh the exact same scenar except the Facebook profile picted Jordan as eher a straight woman, a gay woman or a gay qutns – signed to terme the level of tst tt subjects had for each genr/sexual preference – were ccial to the person’s “game. As turned out, straight women did tst advice given by the gay Jordan more than the advice they got om a straight female or straight male Jordan.

Gay men, turn, tsted straight women’s relatnship advice more than that proffered by gay women or other gay men.

“On average, I would say gay men and straight women probably tst each other around 20 percent more than other dividuals, ” says Rsell. Rsell says he wasn’t surprised by the fdgs, although he did fd tertg that gay men were jt as tstg of straight women as straight women were of gay men. “Both gay men and straight women share a relatnship the absence of matg petn or ulterr or ceptive matg motivatns.

IS MY HBAND GAY? SIGNS OF A GAY HBAND

”It’s a dynamic well-documented movi, lerature and pop culture, says Rsell, potg to famo gay guy-straight gal iendships like Will and Grace and Kurt and Rachel om Glee. There’s even a seri of YouTube vios om the edy group Send Cy showg how a number of famo straight women om lerature – thk Juliet, Lady MacBeth and Charl Dickens’ Miss Havisham – uld have benefed om a “sassy gay iend. Lare was the maid of honor at Fick' weddg, and Fick was Lare's“In general, if you were askg whether I’d tst a straight woman or a gay man an unknown suatn, I’d probably end up tstg the straight woman rather than the gay guy, ” he says.

And as a gay guy, I don’t feel there’s a different agenda happeng, sexual or otherwise. ”Christyne Blount, a 38-year-old fancial analyst om Seattle, says she fely would tst a gay man more than that of a straight man when me to datg advice but feels her straight women iends are every b as reliable.

WHEN GAY MEN (MIS)MARRY STRAIGHT WOMEN: BONNIE KAYE'S STORY

Incintally, the rearcher says he don’t believe the same level of tst uld exist between gay women and straight men. My Hband’s Not Gay, a show on TLC, has ed an uproar. Why do some people bee so outspoken and judgmental about marriag wh one straight and one gay spoe?

WHY STRAIGHT WOMEN ARE ATTRACTED TO GAY MEN

Fally, the relatnships suggt to some people “reparative therapy, ” the uhil and impossible claim that a person n be changed om gay to straight.

The men this televisn program aren’t claimg to be ex-gay nor that they n change their sexual orientatn (at least not on the show). They report they are attracted to men but choose not to live as a gay man and their straight wiv accept this. People seem to get up arms when a man says he is not gay but rather simply attracted to men.

In our culture, we intify ourselv via a sexual-attractn bary: gay or straight. Later, their gay sexual inti surface and here they are—heterosexually married wh children.

I’M A STRAIGHT WOMAN WHO MARRIED A GAY MAN

Many straight women married to gay men nscly choose to do so wh their ey wi open. There are plenty of wiv who choose to stay married even after fdg out later the marriage that their hband is gay and attracted to men. They make this choice wh open discsns, which are very paful and emotnal for both the gay man and the straight wife.