Really Gay Christmas Songs

Contents:

• 25 CHRISTMAS SONGS ONLY GAY PEOPLE AND (INTELLIGENT) STRAIGHT PEOPLE KNOW ARE TLY GAY BOPS
• THE 21 GAYT CHRISTMAS SONGS
• THE MOST CONFG CHRISTMAS MIC LYRICS EXPLAED (VIDEO)WHO IS PARSON BROWN?WHO IS PARSON BROWN? A GLOSSARY OF WHAT ALL THOSE STRANGE PHRAS CLASSIC CHRISTMAS SONGS MEAN.KEV FALLONSENR EDOR, OBSSEDUPDATED APR. 21, 2017 2:15PM EDT / PUBLISHED DEC. 24, 2014 5:45AM EST CLASSICSTOCK/ALAMYWE HAPPILY HOIST OUR EGG NOG THE AIR, EMBRACE EACH OTHER, AND RAISE OUR OUT-OF-TUNE VOIC SONG. AND WE HAVE NO IA WHAT SANTA’S NAME WE’RE SGG.EACH HOLIDAY SEASON, THE MASS ROL ABOUT “FIGGY PUDDG” AND “GAY APPAREL” AND SOMEONE NAMED PARSON BROWN, MOSTLY IGNORANT TO THE MEANG OF THE ANTIQUATED PHRAS AND REFERENC TO THGS LONG PAST. IN THE SPIR OF FDG THE TE MEANG OF CHRISTMAS, WE THOUGHT BT TO FD THE TE MEANG OF THE BEFUDDLG CHRISTMAS SONG LYRICS. HERE, A GLOSSARY TO THE MOST NFG.‘WE WISH YOU A MERRY CHRISTMAS’‘OH, BRG A FIGGY PUDDG’ WHETHER ROLERS WOULD TLY LIKE FOR SOMEONE TO BRG THEM SOME FIGGY PUDDG, AS THEY MAND “WE WISH YOU A MERRY CHRISTMAS,” PENDS ON THEIR FONDNS FOR ANOTHER CLASSIC HOLIDAY SSERT. IT’S “A LTLE B LIKE UKE,” BAKG EXPERT DORIE GREENSPAN TOLD NPR’S MICHELE NORRIS ON ALL THGS CONSIRED. “I WAS AAID TO SAY BEE UKE HAS SUCH A BAD REPUTATN, BUT [FIGGY PUDDG] IS STEAMED; ’S CHOCKABLOCK WH DRIED US; ’S SO BOOZY…’S LIC.” IT WAS POPULARIZED AS A HOLIDAY SSERT 16TH-CENTURY ENGLAND AND ALSO IS KNOWN AS CHRISTMAS PUDDG OR PLUM PUDDG. OVER THE YEARS, S POPULARY HAS WANED SIGNIFINTLY. ‘A HOLLY JOLLY CHRISTMAS’‘I DON’T KNOW IF THERE’LL BE SNOW BUT HAVE A CUP OF CHEER’ THERE’S A CUTE PLAY ON WORDS GOG ON HERE. IT’S CHRISTMAS, BUCKO, SO LOOK HAPPY! BUT AS SOME OF KNOW ALL TOO WELL, “CUP OF CHEER” REFERS MORE SPECIFILLY TO A BRIMMG CUP OF HOLIDAY HAPPY JUICE. BOOZE. WHETHER ’S SPIKED EGG NOG, MULLED CIR, OR SOME OTHER LIBATN, THE NARRATOR HERE IS VG LISTENERS TO RAISE A GLASS, DRK, AND BE MERRY. ‘SLEIGH RI’‘IT’LL NEARLY BE LIKE A PICTURE PRT BY CURRIER AND IV’CURRIER AND IV WAS A PRTMAKG FIRM BASED OUT OF NEW YORK CY OM 1834 TO 1907. FOUND BY NATHANIEL CURRIER, WHO LATER PARTNERED WH JAM MERRT IV, THE FIRM SCRIBED SELF AS “PUBLISHERS OF CHEAP AND POPULAR PRTS,” MOST OF WHICH WERE LHOGRAPHS PICTG THE SPECTM OF AMERIN LIFE. EXTREMELY POPULAR WERE THE WTER LANDSP, WHICH FEATURED UTOPIAN WTER SCEN OF UPL RIDG HORSE-DRAWN RRIAG THROUGH THE SNOW OR FAI ICE SKATG ON PICTURQUE PONDS. IN “SLEIGH RI,” THE NARRATOR IS PATG A SCENE SO PERFECT THAT ULD BE FEATURED ON AN INIC CURRIER AND IV PRT. ‘WTER WONRLAND’‘IN THE MEADOW WE N BUILD A SNOWMAN THEN PRETEND THAT HE IS PARSON BROWN’ ONE LE “WTER WONRLAND” HAS STOPPED UNTLS PEOPLE AD THEIR TRACKS. WHO IS PARSON BROWN, AND WHY ARE THE PEOPLE MAKG A SNOWMAN THAT LOOKS LIKE HIM? GIVEN THAT 1934, WHEN THE SONG WAS WRTEN, THE MOST FAMO PARSON BROWN WAS A FLORIDA ORANGE GROWER, LYRICIST RICHARD B. SMH WAS LIKELY REFERRG TO A FICTNAL PASTOR. DURG THAT PERD, PROTTANT MISTERS WERE LLED “PARSONS” AND WOULD TRAVEL OM TOWN TO TOWN TO PERFORMG WEDDGS FOR UPL WHO DIDN’T HAVE A LOL MISTER OF THEIR FAH WHERE THEY LIVED. SO THOSE LYRICS ARE ACTUALLY A B FLIRTAT. THE NARRATOR IS SUGGTG THAT THEY BUILD A SNOWMAN THAT LOOKS LIKE A MISTER. THE NEXT L, “HE’LL SAY ‘ARE YOU MARRIED?’ WE’LL SAY ‘NO, MAN, BUT YOU N DO THE JOB WHILE YOU’RE TOWN!’” ULD BE NSIRED A MOCK PROPOSAL. ‘DECK THE HALLS’‘DON WE NOW OUR GAY APPAREL FA LA LA, LA LA LA, LA LA LA’“DECK THE HALLS” WAS WRTEN BACK THE 16TH CENTURY, WHEN THE ENGLISH LANGUAGE WAS VERY DIFFERENT. MORN TRANSLATN: “PUT ON YOUR PARTY CLOTH!” ‘HAVE YOURSELF A MERRY LTLE CHRISTMAS’‘MAKE THE YULETI GAY FROM NOW ON YOUR TROUBL WILL BE AWAY, OH’AS WE JT REVIEWED, “GAY” MEANS HAPPY—JUDY GARLAND WAS NOT SGG ABOUT A YULETI WH HOMOSEXUAL LEANGS. “YULETI,” ETYMOLOGILLY, ROOTS THE OLD ENGLISH WORD “ġéOL,” WHICH HAS SCE BEEN TRANSLATED TO “YULE,” REFERRG TO THE 12-DAY RELIG FTIVAL CELEBRATED BY NORTHERN EUROPEANS HUNDREDS OF YEARS AGO. OVER THE YEARS, THE MEANG HAS EVOLVED, SENTIALLY, TO “CHRISTMASTIME,” AND SCRIB THE PERD BETWEEN DEC. 24 AND JAN. 6. JUDY, AS PRSG AS SHE SOUNDS THIS SONG, JT WANTS YOUR HOLIDAY SEASON TO BE HAPPY. ‘IT’S BEGNG TO LOOK A LOT LIKE CHRISTMAS’ ‘A PAIR OF HOPALONG BOOTS AND A PISTOL THAT SHOOTS IS THE WISH OF BARNEY AND BEN’ A PAIR OF HOPALONG BOOTS” KICKS OFF THE LIST OF CHRISTMAS PRENTS FOR PAIRS OF CHILDREN THAT ARE RATTLED OFF “IT’S BEGNG TO LOOK A LOT LIKE CHRISTMAS.” THE BOOTS QUTN HAVE NO PARTICULAR SPRG OR BOUNCE—THE SONG REFERS TO POPULAR STUME BOOTS OM THE ’40S AND ’50S MOLED AFTER THE ON WORN BY THE WBOY HOPALONG CASSIDY A SERI OF BOOKS AND FILMS. ORIGALLY NCEIVED BY THOR CLARENCE E. MULFORD 1904, HOPALONG WAS C, ROUGH-TALKG, AND DANGERO. FOR THE 66 (!) FILMS STARRG WILLIAM BOYD THAT ME OUT THE ’30S AND ’40S BEFORE RE-NNG ON TV AND FDG AN EVEN WIR DIENCE THE ’50S, HOPALONG WAS REBRAND A CLEAN-CUT, VALIANT HERO—AND HIS BOOTS WERE THE PRIZE OF LTLE BOYS EVERYWHERE. ‘SANTA CLS IS COMG TO TOWN’‘ROOTY TOOT TOOT AND MMY TUM TUM SANTA CLS IS G TO TOWN’AMAZGLY, THERE ARE THEORI FLOATG AROUND THAT “ROOTY TOOT TOOT” REFERS A ROOT BEER-FLAVORED NDY WHISTLE, AND “MMY TUM TUM” REFERS TO M BALLS MEANT TO SOOTHE UPSET STOMACHS, WH THE IA THAT “SANTA CLS IS G TO TOWN” AND HE’S BRGG WH HIM NDI TO HELP YOU FEEL BETTER AFTER TOO MUCH PARTYG ON CHRISTMAS EVE. THE REAL ANSWER, HOWEVER, IS MUCH SIMPLER. THE LE RIGHT BEFORE THIS IS “WH LTLE T HORNS AND LTLE TOY DMS.” THE “ROOTY TOOT TOOT” IS SIMPLY THE NOISE THE HORNS MAKE, WHILE “MMY TUM TUM” IS THE DMS. ‘AULD LANG SYNE’‘SHOULD LD ACQUATANCE BE FOTAND LD LANG SYNE’ IMPRS ALL YOUR IENDS ON NEW YEAR’S EVE, EVERYONE. “AULD LANG SYNE” IS STTISH-GAELIC FOR “OLD LONG SCE,” OR, MORE IDMATILLY, “DAYS GONE BY” OR “TIME LONG PAST.” KEV FALLON

25 CHRISTMAS SONGS ONLY GAY PEOPLE AND (INTELLIGENT) STRAIGHT PEOPLE KNOW ARE TLY GAY BOPS

They say Christmas is jt 'Straight Halloween, ' but the gays also do our fair share of celebratg! From classics to brand new songs, om tradnal vers to the gayt lyrics you n thk of, here are 23 of our favore Christmas songs by LGBTQ+ artists to get you the spir this holiday season!

The ultimate gay Christmas classic.

Last week an elementary school teacher Michigan me unr fire when she cid to remove the word "gay" om the classic Christmas rol "Deck The Halls. After parents and others the muny got wd of the change -- and outrage ensued -- the teacher re-serted the supposedly troublome word back to the here at HuffPost Gay Voic believe that when people are aaid of or unfortable wh LGBT people or issu or even words (whether or not the word qutn is actually beg ed relatn to the LGBT muny), sometim the bt tactic is ph for an even greater prence hop of showg we won't be timidated, terred, or, we dug through our rerd llectns (and YouTube) -- to fd the gayt Christmas songs we uld get our hands (and ears) on a lighthearted effort to make thgs a ltle merrier -- and gayer -- this mpy offergs om The Weather Girls and Lady Gaga to songs by gay artists and ins like Gee Michael and Dolly Parton, this is our ltle gift to you this holiday season -- and the perfect playlist for a ftive gay out our selectns the followg slishow, rank them om rnit to most classic, and tell if we missed one of your favor the ments sectn below. Time to make the yuleti (and your playlist) gay.

THE 21 GAYT CHRISTMAS SONGS

We’ve lost track of how many tim we’ve heard this song the GAY TIMES office. Big Freedia – Santa Is A Gay Man. This recent entry onto our ftive playlists om sex-posive bisexual hyperpop star Slayyyter, who’s bee a favoure of the gays over the past year.

THE MOST CONFG CHRISTMAS MIC LYRICS EXPLAED (VIDEO)WHO IS PARSON BROWN?WHO IS PARSON BROWN? A GLOSSARY OF WHAT ALL THOSE STRANGE PHRAS CLASSIC CHRISTMAS SONGS MEAN.KEV FALLONSENR EDOR, OBSSEDUPDATED APR. 21, 2017 2:15PM EDT / PUBLISHED DEC. 24, 2014 5:45AM EST CLASSICSTOCK/ALAMYWE HAPPILY HOIST OUR EGG NOG THE AIR, EMBRACE EACH OTHER, AND RAISE OUR OUT-OF-TUNE VOIC SONG. AND WE HAVE NO IA WHAT SANTA’S NAME WE’RE SGG.EACH HOLIDAY SEASON, THE MASS ROL ABOUT “FIGGY PUDDG” AND “GAY APPAREL” AND SOMEONE NAMED PARSON BROWN, MOSTLY IGNORANT TO THE MEANG OF THE ANTIQUATED PHRAS AND REFERENC TO THGS LONG PAST. IN THE SPIR OF FDG THE TE MEANG OF CHRISTMAS, WE THOUGHT BT TO FD THE TE MEANG OF THE BEFUDDLG CHRISTMAS SONG LYRICS. HERE, A GLOSSARY TO THE MOST NFG.‘WE WISH YOU A MERRY CHRISTMAS’‘OH, BRG A FIGGY PUDDG’ WHETHER ROLERS WOULD TLY LIKE FOR SOMEONE TO BRG THEM SOME FIGGY PUDDG, AS THEY MAND “WE WISH YOU A MERRY CHRISTMAS,” PENDS ON THEIR FONDNS FOR ANOTHER CLASSIC HOLIDAY SSERT. IT’S “A LTLE B LIKE UKE,” BAKG EXPERT DORIE GREENSPAN TOLD NPR’S MICHELE NORRIS ON ALL THGS CONSIRED. “I WAS AAID TO SAY BEE UKE HAS SUCH A BAD REPUTATN, BUT [FIGGY PUDDG] IS STEAMED; ’S CHOCKABLOCK WH DRIED US; ’S SO BOOZY…’S LIC.” IT WAS POPULARIZED AS A HOLIDAY SSERT 16TH-CENTURY ENGLAND AND ALSO IS KNOWN AS CHRISTMAS PUDDG OR PLUM PUDDG. OVER THE YEARS, S POPULARY HAS WANED SIGNIFINTLY. ‘A HOLLY JOLLY CHRISTMAS’‘I DON’T KNOW IF THERE’LL BE SNOW BUT HAVE A CUP OF CHEER’ THERE’S A CUTE PLAY ON WORDS GOG ON HERE. IT’S CHRISTMAS, BUCKO, SO LOOK HAPPY! BUT AS SOME OF KNOW ALL TOO WELL, “CUP OF CHEER” REFERS MORE SPECIFILLY TO A BRIMMG CUP OF HOLIDAY HAPPY JUICE. BOOZE. WHETHER ’S SPIKED EGG NOG, MULLED CIR, OR SOME OTHER LIBATN, THE NARRATOR HERE IS VG LISTENERS TO RAISE A GLASS, DRK, AND BE MERRY. ‘SLEIGH RI’‘IT’LL NEARLY BE LIKE A PICTURE PRT BY CURRIER AND IV’CURRIER AND IV WAS A PRTMAKG FIRM BASED OUT OF NEW YORK CY OM 1834 TO 1907. FOUND BY NATHANIEL CURRIER, WHO LATER PARTNERED WH JAM MERRT IV, THE FIRM SCRIBED SELF AS “PUBLISHERS OF CHEAP AND POPULAR PRTS,” MOST OF WHICH WERE LHOGRAPHS PICTG THE SPECTM OF AMERIN LIFE. EXTREMELY POPULAR WERE THE WTER LANDSP, WHICH FEATURED UTOPIAN WTER SCEN OF UPL RIDG HORSE-DRAWN RRIAG THROUGH THE SNOW OR FAI ICE SKATG ON PICTURQUE PONDS. IN “SLEIGH RI,” THE NARRATOR IS PATG A SCENE SO PERFECT THAT ULD BE FEATURED ON AN INIC CURRIER AND IV PRT. ‘WTER WONRLAND’‘IN THE MEADOW WE N BUILD A SNOWMAN THEN PRETEND THAT HE IS PARSON BROWN’ ONE LE “WTER WONRLAND” HAS STOPPED UNTLS PEOPLE AD THEIR TRACKS. WHO IS PARSON BROWN, AND WHY ARE THE PEOPLE MAKG A SNOWMAN THAT LOOKS LIKE HIM? GIVEN THAT 1934, WHEN THE SONG WAS WRTEN, THE MOST FAMO PARSON BROWN WAS A FLORIDA ORANGE GROWER, LYRICIST RICHARD B. SMH WAS LIKELY REFERRG TO A FICTNAL PASTOR. DURG THAT PERD, PROTTANT MISTERS WERE LLED “PARSONS” AND WOULD TRAVEL OM TOWN TO TOWN TO PERFORMG WEDDGS FOR UPL WHO DIDN’T HAVE A LOL MISTER OF THEIR FAH WHERE THEY LIVED. SO THOSE LYRICS ARE ACTUALLY A B FLIRTAT. THE NARRATOR IS SUGGTG THAT THEY BUILD A SNOWMAN THAT LOOKS LIKE A MISTER. THE NEXT L, “HE’LL SAY ‘ARE YOU MARRIED?’ WE’LL SAY ‘NO, MAN, BUT YOU N DO THE JOB WHILE YOU’RE TOWN!’” ULD BE NSIRED A MOCK PROPOSAL. ‘DECK THE HALLS’‘DON WE NOW OUR GAY APPAREL FA LA LA, LA LA LA, LA LA LA’“DECK THE HALLS” WAS WRTEN BACK THE 16TH CENTURY, WHEN THE ENGLISH LANGUAGE WAS VERY DIFFERENT. MORN TRANSLATN: “PUT ON YOUR PARTY CLOTH!” ‘HAVE YOURSELF A MERRY LTLE CHRISTMAS’‘MAKE THE YULETI GAY FROM NOW ON YOUR TROUBL WILL BE AWAY, OH’AS WE JT REVIEWED, “GAY” MEANS HAPPY—JUDY GARLAND WAS NOT SGG ABOUT A YULETI WH HOMOSEXUAL LEANGS. “YULETI,” ETYMOLOGILLY, ROOTS THE OLD ENGLISH WORD “ġéOL,” WHICH HAS SCE BEEN TRANSLATED TO “YULE,” REFERRG TO THE 12-DAY RELIG FTIVAL CELEBRATED BY NORTHERN EUROPEANS HUNDREDS OF YEARS AGO. OVER THE YEARS, THE MEANG HAS EVOLVED, SENTIALLY, TO “CHRISTMASTIME,” AND SCRIB THE PERD BETWEEN DEC. 24 AND JAN. 6. JUDY, AS PRSG AS SHE SOUNDS THIS SONG, JT WANTS YOUR HOLIDAY SEASON TO BE HAPPY. ‘IT’S BEGNG TO LOOK A LOT LIKE CHRISTMAS’ ‘A PAIR OF HOPALONG BOOTS AND A PISTOL THAT SHOOTS IS THE WISH OF BARNEY AND BEN’ A PAIR OF HOPALONG BOOTS” KICKS OFF THE LIST OF CHRISTMAS PRENTS FOR PAIRS OF CHILDREN THAT ARE RATTLED OFF “IT’S BEGNG TO LOOK A LOT LIKE CHRISTMAS.” THE BOOTS QUTN HAVE NO PARTICULAR SPRG OR BOUNCE—THE SONG REFERS TO POPULAR STUME BOOTS OM THE ’40S AND ’50S MOLED AFTER THE ON WORN BY THE WBOY HOPALONG CASSIDY A SERI OF BOOKS AND FILMS. ORIGALLY NCEIVED BY THOR CLARENCE E. MULFORD 1904, HOPALONG WAS C, ROUGH-TALKG, AND DANGERO. FOR THE 66 (!) FILMS STARRG WILLIAM BOYD THAT ME OUT THE ’30S AND ’40S BEFORE RE-NNG ON TV AND FDG AN EVEN WIR DIENCE THE ’50S, HOPALONG WAS REBRAND A CLEAN-CUT, VALIANT HERO—AND HIS BOOTS WERE THE PRIZE OF LTLE BOYS EVERYWHERE. ‘SANTA CLS IS COMG TO TOWN’‘ROOTY TOOT TOOT AND MMY TUM TUM SANTA CLS IS G TO TOWN’AMAZGLY, THERE ARE THEORI FLOATG AROUND THAT “ROOTY TOOT TOOT” REFERS A ROOT BEER-FLAVORED NDY WHISTLE, AND “MMY TUM TUM” REFERS TO M BALLS MEANT TO SOOTHE UPSET STOMACHS, WH THE IA THAT “SANTA CLS IS G TO TOWN” AND HE’S BRGG WH HIM NDI TO HELP YOU FEEL BETTER AFTER TOO MUCH PARTYG ON CHRISTMAS EVE. THE REAL ANSWER, HOWEVER, IS MUCH SIMPLER. THE LE RIGHT BEFORE THIS IS “WH LTLE T HORNS AND LTLE TOY DMS.” THE “ROOTY TOOT TOOT” IS SIMPLY THE NOISE THE HORNS MAKE, WHILE “MMY TUM TUM” IS THE DMS. ‘AULD LANG SYNE’‘SHOULD LD ACQUATANCE BE FOTAND LD LANG SYNE’ IMPRS ALL YOUR IENDS ON NEW YEAR’S EVE, EVERYONE. “AULD LANG SYNE” IS STTISH-GAELIC FOR “OLD LONG SCE,” OR, MORE IDMATILLY, “DAYS GONE BY” OR “TIME LONG PAST.” KEV FALLON

And we have no ia what Santa’s name we’re holiday season, the mass rol about “figgy puddg” and “gay apparel” and someone named Parson Brown, mostly ignorant to the meang of the antiquated phras and referenc to thgs long past. ‘Deck the Halls’‘Don we now our gay apparelfa la la, la la la, la la la’“Deck the Halls” was wrten back the 16th century, when the English language was very different. ” ‘Have Yourself a Merry Ltle Christmas’‘Make the Yuleti gayFrom now on your troubl will be away, oh’As we jt reviewed, “gay” means happy—Judy Garland was not sgg about a Yuleti wh homosexual leangs.