Love, Simon: at last Hollywood is sayg ‘I’m gay’ | Love, Simon | The Guardian

*BEAR-MAGAZINE.COM* WAS SIMONE GAY IN THE BOOK

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viewBox="0 0 24 24" fill="none" xmlns="><tle>Save this story</tle><path class="in-bookmark-fill" d="M20 23.9508L12.5 19.7312L5 23.9508V2.95081H14V3.93211H6V22.1845L12.5 18.5536L19 22.1845V8.83866H20V23.9508Z"></path><path class="in-bookmark-fill" d="M23 3H20V0H19V3H16V4H19V7H20V4H23V3Z"></path></svg></span><span class="BaseWrap-sc-gjQpdd BaseText-ewhhUZ ActnBarButtonText-bYXYuh iUEiRd bkefvo gkccfO">Save this story</span></button></div></div></div><div class="LightboxWrapper-dxsWBV hhylRt"><div class="ArticlePageChunksContent-etcMtP bwyLBj"><div data-ttid="ArticlePageChunks" class="ArticlePageChunks-fLyCVG Uozmo"><div class="GridWrapper-cAzTTK kHBDeH grid grid-margs grid-ems-2 ArticlePageChunksGrid-hfxa bjczjj grid-layout--adrail narrow wi-adrail"><div class="GridItem-buujkM stRKV grid--em grid-layout__ntent"><div class="BodyWrapper-kufPGa EOneK body body__ntaer article__body" data-journey-hook="client-ntent" data-ttid="BodyWrapper"><div class="body__ner-ntaer"><p class="has-dropp has-dropp__lead-standard-headg">The legend of <a href=">Simone Bevoir</a>—of how an obedient Catholic schoolgirl st off her rigid, patriarchal upbrgg to bee the high prits of existential femism—is often narrated as a love story. Her bgraphers trace her pe om the bourgeois Parisian i to which she was born, 1908, first to the Sorbonne and then to the Éle Normale Supérire. There, among the “gracels fac” of the <em>agrégatn</em> ndidat of 1929, she spied Jean-Pl Sartre, twenty-four years old and—as she rhapsodized “<a data-offer-url=" class="external-lk" data-event-click="{"element":"ExternalLk","outgogURL":"" href=" rel="nofollow noopener" target="_blank">Memoirs of a Dutiful Dghter</a>” (1958), the first of four tobgraphil volum—“still young enough to feel emotnal about his future whenever he heard a saxophone playg after his third marti.” Together, she and her “Playboy,” her “Leprechn,” as she lled him, chased life’s pleasur up the steps of Boulevard du Montparnasse, down the Avenue d’Orléans, and all around the woodland parks of Paris, where her parents had forbidn her and her sister to speak wh children outsi their social class. Bevoir’s mother was voted to the Church and s rigid moralism; her father tted tellectuals and wanted his olst dghter to “marry a untry .” By the time she met Sartre, Bevoir had different aspiratns. “Never have I so loved to read and thk, never have I been so alive and happy or envisned a future so rich. Oh! Jean-Pl, ar Jean-Pl, thank you,” she wrote her diary.</p><p class="paywall">For all the romance of the cy bloomg before her ey, Bevoir always played the love story self—her dawng attractn to this garlo, cross-eyed, funny ltle man—remarkably ol. She liked Sartre’s face and pany but disliked his “false eye.” She was more pafully and earntly attracted to her iend the philosopher René Mah, and even to her rakish Jacqu. But she exulted Sartre’s attentn to her; was an opportuny to fe herself and the force she longed to be the world. “We ed to talk about all kds of thgs, but pecially about a subject which terted me above all others: myself,” she wrote. “Whenever other people ma attempts to analyse me, they did so om the standpot of their own ltle worlds, and this ed to exasperate me. But Sartre always tried to see me as part of my own scheme of thgs, to unrstand me light of my own set of valu and attus.” Wh him, she was not “the Other,” the subordate female posn that she scribed her 1949 femist classic, “<a data-offer-url=" class="external-lk" data-event-click="{"element":"ExternalLk","outgogURL":"" href=" rel="nofollow noopener" target="_blank">The Send Sex</a>”: a timid and imagatively impoverished creature for whom love was simply somethg provid to a hband as a matter of urse. Bevoir’s relatnship wh Sartre, as she reunts her tobgraphil wrgs, led her om a state of alienatn, which she was only a b player other people’s “ltle worlds,” to the assurance that she was a sgular and irrcible “Self.” She uld fe and terpret the meang of her life through the energetic exercise of her “sovereign nscns.”</p><p class="paywall">Bevoir’s tobgraphy, a sense, acrd perfectly wh the prcipl of French existentialism—s sistence on the eedom of every person’s nscns and s Sartrean slogan that “existence preces sence.” Perhaps the rrponnce is a ltle too neat. Te, tellectuals often pri themselv on livg and lovg by their theori—“There is no divorce between philosophy and life,” Bevoir famoly avowed—but is hard to believe the story of their early days que as she tells . Not a hair is out of place, not a moment of shock or doubt rippl the surface of her triumphant self-termatn. “Every woman love regniz herself Hans Anrsen’s ltle mermaid who exchanged her fishtail for a woman’s legs for love, and then found herself walkg on needl and burng als,” she claims “The Send Sex.” How to rencile such self-abnegatg masochism wh her joyo rellectn of disverg herself wh Sartre?</p><p class="paywall">As reful rears of Bevoir’s memoirs and diari have noted, the strategilly plotted romance between postwar France’s greatt male and female philosophers is hnted by the prence of a shadowy third—a iend. The most extreme feelgs of agatn and rapture are rerved not for Sartre but for Elisabeth La, a brilliant and mercurial classmate whom Bevoir lled Zaza, and whose name Bevoir unrled black or brown k throughout her diari, stg a pall over all that surround .</p><p class="paywall">They met when they were around ten, unr the uncharable ey of the nuns at the Cours Désirs school and the ntemptuo gaze of Zaza’s “od mother,” as Bevoir scribed her. Whereas the Bevoirs lived genteel poverty, Zaza was a member of the hte bourgeoisie, the third of ne children, and “very high-stng, like a sleek and elegant racehorse ready to bolt out of ntrol,” as Bevoir’s sister sniffed to the bgrapher Deirdre Bair. Zaza had been bred to marry, and to marry well. Nothg uld nvce Madame La otherwise: not Zaza’s nimble, mischievo md, which won her a place at the Sorbonne; not her enthiasm for lerature or her talent for mic; not her love for Bevoir’s classmate the philosopher Mrice Merle-Ponty, lled Jean Pralle Bevoir’s memoirs. Zaza, torn between her fealty to her mother and her thirst for eedom, grew wretched, antic, and ightengly th, until one day, the tumn of 1929, while Bevoir and Sartre were embarkg on their affair, she me down wh a fever and an agonizg headache—a se of viral encephalis, the doctors spected. She died a clic at Sat-Cloud, where she kept llg out for her “vl, Pralle, Simone, champagne.”</p><p class="paywall">“I loved Zaza wh an tensy which uld not be acunted for by any tablished set of l and nventns,” Bevoir relled her memoirs, almost thirty years after her iend’s ath. “The least praise om Zaza overwhelmed me wh joy; the sarstic s she so equently gave me were a terrible torment.” She scrib her “subjugatn” to her beloved as plungg her “to the black pths of huy.” It was the pths that Bevoir’s abject “ltle mermaid” swam: her ia of love as a state of sacrifice and sufferg was provoked not by a man but by what the lerary cric Lisa Appignani scrib, wh licy, as one of Bevoir’s “amoro iendships” wh a woman. Others have been bolr about llg a spa a spa. “Simone was the thro of her first great love affair,” her adopted dghter and lerary executor, Sylvie Le Bon Bevoir, wr an afterword to “L Inséparabl,” a novel about Zaza’s radiant life and swift ath, which Bevoir wrote the wter of 1954 and then abandoned. It fally appeared France last year, and now, as if to make up for lost time, appears not one but two English translatns— the U.K. as “<a data-offer-url=" class="external-lk" data-event-click="{"element":"ExternalLk","outgogURL":"" href=" rel="nofollow noopener" target="_blank">The Inseparabl</a>” (Vtage), translated by Lren Elk, and the Uned Stat as “<a data-offer-url=" class="external-lk" data-event-click="{"element":"ExternalLk","outgogURL":"" href=" rel="nofollow noopener" target="_blank">Inseparable</a>” (Ec), translated by Sandra Smh. The story, scribed France as “a tragic lbian love story,” has been billed as “too timate” to be published durg Bevoir’s lifetime.</p><p class="has-dropp has-dropp__lead-standard-headg paywall">“The Inseparabl” begs as most love stori do, wh the meetg of two young people, each alien to the other. One day, at the Collège Alaï, a ne-year-old girl wh startlgly dark, fervent ey and a hollow ltle face ss next to Sylvie Lepage. The girl’s name is Andrée Gallard, and is her first time at school. Immediately, she offers Sylvie a glimpse of the pa and the pleasure of the flh flamed. When she was younger, she reveals, her skirt ught fire as she stood too close to some potato roastg on a mpfire. She burned her thigh right down to the bone, and the wound still bulged unr her skirt. This cint tablish the asymmetry that f their relatnship. “Nothg so tertg had ever happened to me,” Sylvie thks. “It sudnly seemed as if nothg had ever happened to me at all.”</p><p class="paywall">About Sylvie, our first-person narrator, we learn very ltle; on the surface, she is a nventnal child of the Parisian middle class. Unrneath, her tremendo powers of observatn are fixed on Andrée, who appears to her a splendid and unnny creature. Andrée addrs their teachers as equals, a voice that is pole but souciant. She plays the piano and the vl wh easy mastery, speaks of “Don Quixote and Cyrano Bergerac as if they had existed flh and blood,” and turns somerslts and rtwheels wh unexpected vigor. Her every word is e for Sylvie’s turmoil; the ia of her absence is, que simply, unbearable. “Life whout her would be ath,” Sylvie reflects when they are rned after a summer apart. “It was those moments that I was most troublgly aware of the gift she had received om heaven, which I found so enthrallg: her personaly.”</p><div><div class="ConsumerMarketgUnThemedWrapper-iUTMTf jssHut nsumer-marketg-un nsumer-marketg-un--article-mid-ntent" role="prentatn" aria-hidn="te"><div class="nsumer-marketg-un__slot nsumer-marketg-un__slot--article-mid-ntent nsumer-marketg-un__slot---ntent"></div><div class="journey-un"></div></div></div><p class="paywall">Sylvie’s feelg for Andrée as they grow up is not jt love; is a transcennt love, the love by which all other lov mt be fed and judged. “I uld only nceive of one kd of love: the love I had for her,” Sylvie thks. “The kd of love where you kiss”—by which she means kiss men—“had no tth for me.” Yet Sylvie’s love is not reciproted, bee Andrée’s “love for her mother ma her other attachments pale by parison.” In turn, Andrée’s filial love is not reciproted, eher, bee Madame Gallard se her dghter not as dazzlgly and imably alive but as a performer of “social duti,” a girl of marriageable age whose piety and obedience to her fay mt be prerved if she is to bee a rpectable woman. “No doubt she loved Andrée her way, but what way was that?” Sylvie wonrs. “That was the qutn. We all loved her, only differently.”</p><div data-attr-viewport-monor="le-recirc" class="le-recirc-wrapper le-recirc-observer-target-1 viewport-monor-anchor"></div><p class="paywall">The drama of “The Inseparabl” li the tensn between the petg and imperfectly requed lov for Andrée: first the lov of Sylvie and Madame Gallard, then the love of Pasl, a joyful Catholic philosopher (the Merle-Ponty figure) who allows Andrée to image that she might rencile duty and happs—at least until he begs to lay proposg marriage to her. The problem that preoccupi the novel is not who lov Andrée bt but what kd of love would grant her the eedom she crav. As the girls grow, Sylvie fds herself repulsed by the religsy of the Gallard fay and Pasl, and her fah God is replaced by her quasi-spirual votn to Andrée. The novel leaps om one glor table to another of Andrée dive solu, prayg or playg her vl a park. Alongsi Sylvie, we, as rears, stop, stay, and bear wns to an outpourg of reverence:</p><blockquote class="BlockquoteEmbedWrapper-sc-SdiGL jPeLne paywall blockquote-embed"><div class="BlockquoteEmbedContent-RbGs gmbtPx blockquote-embed__ntent"><p>When I sometim went to pray the chapel, often I would fd she had arrived there first, on her kne before the altar, her head her hands, or reachg her arms towards a statn of the cross. Was she ntemplatg one day takg her vows? And yet she so loved her eedom, and the joys of this world. Her ey shone when she told me about her holidays, how she spent hours gallopg on horseback through the forts of pe tre, gettg scratched by their branch as she went, how she swam through still waters ponds, or the hwater of the Adour river. Was she dreamg about that paradise when she sat motnls before her notebooks, wh a lost look her eye?</p></div></blockquote><p class="paywall">The unpretendg bety of passag like this, of which there are many, riv om an athetic of distance: the pleasure of g upon Andrée wh her head hidn her hands, reachg away om Sylvie toward an effable dream; the wi-open spac of woods and water. Here is an attentive and untimate love, one that relish the ia of imagg, but never knowg and never limg, the fe expans of another person’s md. This love has nothg to do wh the masterful assertn of selfhood that Bevoir attribut to her relatnship wh Sartre. Rather, rells the theory of love advanced by a classmate at the Sorbonne, the philosopher and mystic Simone Weil. “To love purely is to nsent to distance, is to adore the distance between ourselv and that which we love,” Weil wrote. “To empty ourselv of our false divy, to ny ourselv, to give up beg the centre of the world imagatn. . . . Such nsent is love.” Ironilly, perhaps, “The Inseparabl” poss separatens as love’s athetic and ethil sence.</p><div class="Contaer-bkChBi byNLHx"></div><p class="paywall">Compare Sylvie’s quiet, lumo imagatn wh the loud pilp of posssns that she se crowdg Andrée the Gallards’ pantry, where Andrée’s mother keeps her by to acclimate her to the duti of marriage:</p></div></div></div><div class="GridItem-buujkM fVLMby grid--em grid-layout__asi"><asi class="PersistentAsiWrapper-VGrR daRVRt persistent-asi" style="posn:absolute;top:to;height:to" data-ttid="PersistentAsiWrapper"><div class="StickyBoxWrapper-jfYB jxBcTH sticky-box"><div class="StickyBoxPrimary-dzWDWL cdhYoN sticky-box__primary"><div class="AdWrapper-dQtivb fZrssQ ad ad--rail"><div class="ad__slot ad__slot--rail" data-no-id="cq5fke"></div></div><div class="ConsumerMarketgUnThemedWrapper-iUTMTf jssHut nsumer-marketg-un nsumer-marketg-un--display-rail" role="prentatn" aria-hidn="te"><div class="nsumer-marketg-un__slot nsumer-marketg-un__slot--display-rail"></div><div class="journey-un"></div></div></div><div class="StickyBoxPlaceholr-grPmrg dxAvXx"></div></div></asi></div></div><div class="RowWrapper-UmqTg HEhan full-bleed-ad row-mid-ntent-ad"><div class="StickyMidContentAdWrapper-fSBzwl drzyIa ad-stickymidntent"><div class="AdWrapper-dQtivb fZrssQ ad ad--mid-ntent should-hold-space"><div class="ad__slot ad__slot--mid-ntent" data-no-id="zrxxm"></div></div></div></div><div class="GridWrapper-cAzTTK kHBDeH grid grid-margs grid-ems-2 ArticlePageChunksGrid-hfxa bjczjj grid-layout--adrail narrow wi-adrail"><div class="GridItem-buujkM stRKV grid--em grid-layout__ntent"><div class="BodyWrapper-kufPGa EOneK body body__ntaer article__body" data-journey-hook="client-ntent" data-ttid="BodyWrapper"><div class="body__ner-ntaer"><blockquote class="BlockquoteEmbedWrapper-sc-SdiGL jPeLne paywall blockquote-embed"><div class="BlockquoteEmbedContent-RbGs gmbtPx blockquote-embed__ntent"><p>Everythg was ma of st iron, earthenware, stoneware, porcela, t, alumium; there were okg pots, yg pans, scepans, skillets, uldrons, sserol, soup bowls, servg platters, tureens, tumblers, lanrs, mcers, ls, moulds, and mortars. An endls variety of bowls, cups, glass, champagne flut and up, plat, scers, sce boats, jars, jugs, pchers, raf. Do each kd of spoon, ladle, fork and knife really have s own particular purpose? Do we really have so many different needs to satisfy? This clanste subterranean world mt turn up on the surface of the earth for enormo and discerng dner parti that I knew nothg about.</p></div></blockquote><figure class="AssetEmbedWrapper-eVDQiB byBkf asset-embed"><div class="AssetEmbedAssetContaer-eJxoAx dBHGoQ asset-embed__asset-ntaer"><span class="SpanWrapper-umhxW kKwZhx rponsive-asset AssetEmbedRponsiveAsset-cXBNxi eCxVQK asset-embed__rponsive-asset"><div data-attr-viewport-monor="" class="RponsiveCartoonWrapper-iTMMjI eXTYsS rponsive-rtoon AssetEmbedRponsiveAsset-cXBNxi eCxVQK asset-embed__rponsive-asset viewport-monor-anchor"><a class="external-lk rponsive-rtoon__image-lk" data-event-click="{"element":"ExternalLk","outgogURL":"" href=" rel="nofollow noopener" target="_blank"><picture class="RponsiveImagePicture-cWuUZO dUOtEa RponsiveCartoonImage-hzNqyc ikeCcH rponsive-rtoon__image rponsive-image"><noscript><img alt="“Howards stuck trans—hell be FaceTimg .”" class="RponsiveImageContaer-eybHBd fptoWY rponsive-image__image" src=" srcSet=" 120w, 240w, 320w, 640w, 960w, 1280w, 1600w" siz="100vw"/></noscript></picture></a><div class="CaptnWrapper-jSZdqE gdZTpI ptn RponsiveCartoonCaptn-dokfdF hJgaLQ rponsive-rtoon__ptn"><span class="BaseWrap-sc-gjQpdd BaseText-ewhhUZ CaptnText-bHjzlu iUEiRd hWyo bsWloa ptn__text">“Howard’s stuck trans—he’ll be FaceTimg .”</span></div><div class="CaptnWrapper-jSZdqE iTuhkZ ptn RponsiveCartoonCred-bKlQqO faLAFb rponsive-rtoon__cred"><span class="BaseWrap-sc-gjQpdd BaseText-ewhhUZ CaptnCred-ejegDm iUEiRd iicloT bmQtfn ptn__cred">Cartoon by Joe Dator</span></div><div class="RponsiveCartoonCTA-eiqqMB iDCQRs"><div class="RponsiveCartoonCTAWrapper-CYIqa iTbFtf"><div class="RponsiveCartoonLkButtonWrapper-hqDAJK eSEhbj"><button aria-label="Copy lk to rtoon" class="BaseButton-bLlsy ButtonWrapper-xCepQ bqVKKv YsOBB button button--primary-pair RponsiveCartoonInButton-hBCBMq lpsjql" data-event-click="{"element":"Button"}" data-ttid="Button" type="button"><span class="ButtonLabel-cjAuJN bBWXSg 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19C8.03652 18.4477 8.48424 18 9.03652 18C9.58881 18 10.0365 18.4477 10.0365 19ZM11.0365 19C11.0365 20.1046 10.1411 21 9.03652 21C7.93195 21 7.03652 20.1046 7.03652 19C7.03652 17.8954 7.93195 17 9.03652 17C10.1411 17 11.0365 17.8954 11.0365 19ZM18.0365 19C18.0365 19.5523 17.5888 20 17.0365 20C16.4842 20 16.0365 19.5523 16.0365 19C16.0365 18.4477 16.4842 18 17.0365 18C17.5888 18 18.0365 18.4477 18.0365 19ZM19.0365 19C19.0365 20.1046 18.1411 21 17.0365 21C15.932 21 15.0365 20.1046 15.0365 19C15.0365 17.8954 15.932 17 17.0365 17C18.1411 17 19.0365 17.8954 19.0365 19Z" fill="black"></path></g><fs><clipPath id="clip0_3732_178638"><rect width="24" height="24" fill="whe"></rect></clipPath><clipPath id="clip1_3732_178638"><rect width="24" height="24" fill="whe"></rect></clipPath></fs></svg></div></button></div></div></div></span></div></figure><p class="paywall">There is somethg mmerizg about the absurdly specialized utensils; one n almost hear them clatterg their way to the girls’ hands. Yet the pleasure of abundance quickly yields to the clstrophobic hell of domticy, the spirual ath of the girl the procs of beg the good wife. For all Madame Gallard’s talk of God, there is no room for divy amid such clutter. When, at the novel’s end, Pasl ref to propose to Andrée, and she falls to a feated, feverish oblivn and di, her grave is piled wh whe flowers, symbols of her untrammelled virtue. Their excs rells the excs of kchenware heaped upon the woman-to-be, who has, dyg, simply exchanged one tomb for another. “A dark sight occurred to me: Andrée had suffoted all this whens,” Sylvie thks. “Atop that immaculate abundance, I lay down three red ros.”</p><p class="has-dropp has-dropp__lead-standard-headg paywall">One wonrs if Bevoir would have approved of the novel’s publitn nearly seventy years after she drafted . “When I showed to Sartre after two or three months, he held his nose,” she relled “Force of Circumstance,” the third volume of her memoirs. “I uldn’t have agreed more: the story seemed to have no ner necsy and failed to hold the rear’s tert.” Whether her ncurrence wh Sartre is feigned is impossible to terme; certaly seems overeager. I spect that Bevoir, pickg up her pen, was pricked by two nflictg pulsns—the sire to summon her ghost and the sire to exorcise her forever. And perhaps, too, Sartre found nvenient that another had preëmpted him as Bevoir’s first love. Much of her fictn up to that pot, such as “She Came to Stay” and “The Mandars,” had ncerned him and her, and had done much to enshre the myth of their “sential love” wh all s “ntgent love affairs.”</p><p class="paywall">Notwhstandg the salacns surroundg the novel’s release today, reveals nothg new about the facts of Bevoir’s life. Nearly all the events related “The Inseparabl”—Sylvie’s thwarted love, Pasl’s refal to propose, Andrée’s ath—were repurposed, four years later, “Memoirs of a Dutiful Dghter,” often nearly word for word. And neher book marked La’s first appearance Bevoir’s wrg. In “<a data-offer-url=" class="external-lk" data-event-click="{"element":"ExternalLk","outgogURL":"" href=" rel="nofollow noopener" target="_blank">When Thgs of the Spir Come First</a>,” a llectn of stori she began 1935, La was disguised as Anne, a young woman who di after her Catholic mother manipulat her to givg up the man she lov. When me to tellg the story of Zaza, the distctn between fictn and nonfictn was, for Bevoir, largely ornamental, a matter of swappg nam and plac.</p><p class="paywall">The te “separabl” are not Andrée and Sylvie, or Zaza and Simone, but the disrd novel and the wildly succsful memoir. The novel rtor Zaza to her rightful place as a subject, prentg her as a sgular beg, parable and ultimately unknowable to the narrator herself. It is propelled by the jealo, cur, melancholy, and blissful ntractns of eros whout any expectatn of reciprocy. The Andrée / Zaza figure is permted to live and die on her own terms, her story untethered om the future fame or philosophil ratnalizatns of the narrator, who is, the pag, nobody of note at all.</p><p class="paywall">“Memoirs of a Dutiful Dghter,” by ntrast, treats the story of Zaza as a sgle thread the large, plited, and by taptry of Bevoir’s early life. As if to agate agast the asymmetry of feelg between her and Zaza life, Bevoir amed her journey to selfhood her memoir through Zaza’s loss of . The wrer, by survivg the iend who had outshone her, beme “both md and memory, the sential Subject.” The ia that their fat were entangled a zero-sum stggle between female eedom and bondage, Self and Other, repeats the memoir’s fal sentenc: “She has often appeared to me at night, her face all yellow unr a pk sun-bon, and seemg to gaze reproachfully at me. We had fought together agast the revoltg fate that had la ahead of , and for a long time, I believed that I had paid for my own eedom wh her ath.”</p><p class="paywall">Why the reproachful gaze? If there is somethg touchg about Bevoir’s persistent elegiac impulse, then there is also a stra of celty her nsignment of Zaza to the role of the Other the memoirs. Her submissn to Simone is nsistent wh Bevoir’s unrstandg of youthful lbianism “The Send Sex.” In the chapter tled “The Girl,” Bevoir explaed wh ol nvictn that “nearly all girls have lbian tennci; the tennci are barely distguishable om narcissistic lights.” Lbianism among girls was the handmaid to heterosexual self-termatn, and no one was a more dutiful handmaid than a bt girliend. The argument stigmatiz lbianism while also mimizg s erotic and social power, s centraly to both pleasure and polics. But the book unrcuts s own posn, through the sheer scriptive light wh which Bevoir wr of the sweetns of a woman’s sk and the curv of her body—not to mentn the repeated disgt wh which she tails heterosexual terurse. “It is as if the very subject of lbianism mak Bevoir pable of anisg her thought,” the cric Toril Moi has observed. Dire, when improperly acknowledged, giv birth to a theory that tells on s thor.</p><div data-attr-viewport-monor="le-recirc" class="le-recirc-wrapper le-recirc-observer-target-2 viewport-monor-anchor"></div><p class="paywall">To read “The Inseparabl” is to learn what uld have been, and to judge what was a ltle more harshly. It is to see the memoirs a lgerg refal to give Zaza the tonomy that everyone life seems to have nied her at the greatt possible st. And is to see “The Send Sex” an abily, or perhaps an unwillgns, to make as affirmative a se as possible for lbian inty. Was “bee she did not tst her own agmentary experience or her unrstandg of ?” the lerary cric Meryl Altman has asked. “Bee she did not feel she uld, or should, speak for others?” Or, we might wonr, was bee she wanted to enfold lmly and quietly to a general theory of love?</p><p class="has-dropp has-dropp__lead-standard-headg paywall">Love is often fed through opposn and negatn: love vers iendship, love vers hate, love vers difference, love vers money. Yet the most movg part of “The Inseparabl” is a ditn addrsed directly to Zaza, which suggts a different axis along which love to foc: ath. “If there are tears my ey tonight, is bee you are no longer alive, or bee I am?” Bevoir wonrs. “I should dite this story to you, but I know that you no longer exist anywhere, and my wrg to you like this is pure lerary artifice. In any se, this isn’t really your story, only one spired by . You were not Andrée; nor was I Sylvie, who speaks my name.” What is the purpose of an utterance sted to rema unread by s signated addrsee? Why speak when the one you speak to will never answer?</p><p class="paywall">In “The Inseparabl,” the distctn between iends and lovers, straight love and queer love, pal before the difference between lovg a iend who is alive and one who is ad. As Jacqu Derrida shows “<a data-offer-url=" class="external-lk" data-event-click="{"element":"ExternalLk","outgogURL":"" href=" rel="nofollow noopener" target="_blank">Polics of Friendship</a>,” many great medatns on iendship—by Cicero, by Montaigne, by Bataille, by Blanchot—are also medatns on mourng. The mourners “entst and refe” the ath of the iend by mtg his sence to words, his spir to memory. The figure of the ad iend is not a tt of love’s endurance but, rather, an act of rual purifitn. The thor’s addrs to “the unique one” is nverted to a universal language, an utterance directed not to one but to many. The project of grievg a iend is one of flgg pleas and promis and impretns to the abyss, hopg agast all hope to hear somethg other than the echo of your own voice.</p><p class="paywall">For Derrida, ath lays bare the sential separatens of the iend not only ath but also life—the belief altery that has stctured all theori of morn iendship sce Montaigne scribed a iend as one who “surpassed me by an fe distance.” In ath’s shadow, this separatens reach s unbearable lim. It was this lim that Bevoir spent much of her life phg agast, not jt by stirrg the memory of Zaza aga and aga her wrg but also by attemptg to fd another such relatnship—that is, to rernate Zaza. Bevoir’s long relatnship wh Sylvie Le Bon, whom she adopted and ma her executor before she died, was the last of the enavors. “You n expla my feelg for Sylvie by parg to my iendship for Zaza. I have kept my nostalgia for that my whole life. Sce she died, I have often sired to have an tense, daily, and total relatnship wh a woman,” she claimed. Yet a surrogate is ually a poor imatn of the origal. Only now that Zaza and Bevoir are both ad n a kd of reciprocy be rtored. Neher n speak; neher n listen. Neher n be known to anyone anymore, let alone to each other.</p><p class="paywall">“Doubtls was my iendship wh Zaza which ma me attach so much weight to the perfect unn of two human begs; disverg the world together and as were makg a gift of their disveri to one another, they would, I felt, take posssn of a specially privileged way,” Bevoir wrote her memoirs. The scriptn evok other ialized relatnships that hnt her wrg. The first is the love between adult women scribed the chapter of “The Send Sex” tled “The Lbian.” This love transcends the narcissistic closens of love between girls, a betiful balancg of selv. “Between women, love is ntemplatn,” Bevoir wrote. “Separatn is elimated, there is neher fight nor victory nor feat; each one is both subject and object, sovereign and slave exact reciprocy.” She knew, of urse, that there was no actual human relatnship that this scribed. It was a utopia on par wh the ia of the livg mung wh the ad. But was a utopia she claimed for women, the women that she and Zaza had never been together.</p></div></div></div><div class="GridItem-buujkM fVLMby grid--em grid-layout__asi"><div class="StickyBoxWrapper-jfYB jxBcTH sticky-box"><div class="StickyBoxPrimary-dzWDWL cdhYoN sticky-box__primary"></div><div class="StickyBoxPlaceholr-grPmrg dxAvXx"></div></div></div></div><div class="RowWrapper-UmqTg HEhan full-bleed-ad row-mid-ntent-ad"><div class="StickyMidContentAdWrapper-fSBzwl drzyIa ad-stickymidntent"><div class="AdWrapper-dQtivb fZrssQ ad ad--mid-ntent should-hold-space"><div class="ad__slot ad__slot--mid-ntent" data-no-id="jec"></div></div></div></div><div class="GridWrapper-cAzTTK kHBDeH grid grid-margs grid-ems-2 ArticlePageChunksGrid-hfxa bjczjj grid-layout--adrail narrow wi-adrail"><div class="GridItem-buujkM stRKV grid--em grid-layout__ntent"><div class="BodyWrapper-kufPGa EOneK body body__ntaer article__body" data-journey-hook="client-ntent" data-ttid="BodyWrapper"><div class="body__ner-ntaer"><p class="paywall">The other ialized relatnship is the impersonal timacy between rear and wrer. As Bevoir mt have known om her great love of Prot, readg and wrg were, for him, the tt forms of “scere” iendship, for they were the purt attempts to nverse wh a person who was absent or ad. Friendship wh the livg offered merely the ol veneer of “iendls,” Prot wrote, for immediately trapped nventns of “ference, gratu, and votn” that led nowhere but back to the hollows of our own anx mds. What Bevoir “The Inseparabl” lls the “pure lerary artifice” of speakg to a mute, glor rear pots to the scere iendship and queer love tangled ep the heart of her wrg. It is a iendship that we are now ved to partake of as her rear, the two separabl’ shadowy third. ♦</p><le-embed name="" attrs="[object Object]" childTyp="" ntentType="llout:"><hr class="paywall"/><h2 class="paywall">New Yorker Favor</h2><ul class="paywall"><li>Snoozers are, fact, <a href=">losers</a>.</li><li>The book for children that is an <a href=">amphib celebratn of same-sex love</a>.</li><li>Why the <a href=">last snow on Earth</a> may be red.</li><li>The se for <a href=">not beg born</a>.</li><li>A pill to <a href=">make exercise obsolete</a>.</li><li>The fantastil, earnt world of <a href=">hnted dolls on eBay</a>.</li><li>Sign up for our daily <a href=">newsletter</a> to receive the bt stori om <em>The New Yorker</em>.</li></ul></le-embed></div></div></div><div class="GridItem-buujkM fVLMby grid--em grid-layout__asi"><div class="StickyBoxWrapper-jfYB jxBcTH sticky-box"><div class="StickyBoxPrimary-dzWDWL cdhYoN sticky-box__primary"><div class="AdWrapper-dQtivb fZrssQ ad 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cLxcNi">Annals of Inquiry</span></div><a class="SummaryItemHedLk-civM dVrbhU summary-em-trackg__hed-lk summary-em__hed-lk" data-ponent-type="recirc-river" data-recirc-id="em-hed-1" data-recirc-pattern="summary-em" href=" target="_self"><div class="SummaryItemHedBase-hiFYpQ fzzTdh summary-em__hed" data-ttid="SummaryItemHed">Are You the Same Person You Used to Be?</div></a><div class="BaseWrap-sc-gjQpdd BaseText-ewhhUZ SummaryItemDek-CRfsi iUEiRd kxnNhB jDyfzW summary-em__k">Rearchers have studied how much of our personaly is set om childhood, but what you’re like isn’t who you are.</div><div class="SummaryItemByleWrapper-boCfbi cuRXdL summary-em__byle-date-in"><div class="SummaryItemBaseByle-fFbXkY cgDBtc summary-em__byle"><div class="summary-em__byle__ntent"><div data-ttid="BylWrapper" class="BylWrapper-KIudk irTIfE byl"><p class="ByleWrapper-jWHrLH dSEWiO byle byl__byle" data-ttid="ByleWrapper" emProp="thor" emType="><span emProp="name" class="ByleNamWrapper-jbHncj fuDQVo"><span data-ttid="ByleName" class="ByleName-kwmrLn cYaBaU byle__name"><span class="BaseWrap-sc-gjQpdd BaseText-ewhhUZ BylePreamble-iJolpQ iUEiRd jslZfG gnILss byle__preamble">By </span>Joshua Rothman</span></span></p></div></div></div></div></div></div><div class="SummaryItemWrapper-iwvBff hNpSyX summary-em summary-em--ARTICLE summary-em--no-in summary-em--text-align-left summary-em--layout-placement-text-below summary-em--layout-posn-image-left summary-em--layout-proportns-50-50 summary-em--si-by-si-align-center summary-em--si-by-si-image-right-mobile-false summary-em--standard SummaryCollectnGridSummaryItem-WColm hKqhyj" role="button" tabx="0"><div class="SummaryItemAssetContaer-gwhFFH VOyg summary-em__asset-ntaer"><a class="SummaryItemImageLk-dshqxb cPpCwE summary-em__image-lk summary-em-trackg__image-lk" href=" aria-hidn="te" tabx="-1" data-ponent-type="recirc-river" data-recirc-id="em-image-2" data-recirc-pattern="summary-em" target="_self"><span class="SpanWrapper-umhxW kGxnNB rponsive-asset SummaryItemRponsiveAsset-hjGIGg bDvSkO summary-em__image"><div data-tt="aspect-rat-ntaer" class="AspectRatContaer-bJHpJz jMoLpX"><div class="aspect-rat--overlay-ntaer"><picture class="RponsiveImagePicture-cWuUZO dUOtEa SummaryItemRponsiveAsset-hjGIGg bDvSkO summary-em__image rponsive-image"><noscript><source media="(max-width: 767px)" srcSet=" 120w, 240w, 320w, 640w" siz="100vw"/><source media="(m-width: 768px)" srcSet=" 120w, 240w, 320w" siz="100vw"/><img alt="The Upper Wt Si Cult That Hid Pla Sight" class="RponsiveImageContaer-eybHBd fptoWY rponsive-image__image" src="></noscript></picture></div></div></span></a></div><div class="SummaryItemContent-eiDYMl XMZX summary-em__ntent"><div class="RubricWrapper-dKmCNX kImuKS bric bric--disvery SummaryItemRubric-dguGKN lapGFj summary-em__bric"><span class="RubricName-fVtemz cLxcNi">Unr Review</span></div><a class="SummaryItemHedLk-civM dVrbhU summary-em-trackg__hed-lk summary-em__hed-lk" data-ponent-type="recirc-river" data-recirc-id="em-hed-2" data-recirc-pattern="summary-em" href=" target="_self"><div class="SummaryItemHedBase-hiFYpQ fzzTdh summary-em__hed" data-ttid="SummaryItemHed">The Upper Wt Si Cult That Hid Pla Sight</div></a><div class="BaseWrap-sc-gjQpdd BaseText-ewhhUZ SummaryItemDek-CRfsi iUEiRd kxnNhB jDyfzW summary-em__k">In the sixti and seventi, the Sullivanian Instute had a wng sal pch for young New Yorkers: parti, sex, low rent, and affordable therapy.</div><div class="SummaryItemByleWrapper-boCfbi cuRXdL summary-em__byle-date-in"><div class="SummaryItemBaseByle-fFbXkY cgDBtc summary-em__byle"><div class="summary-em__byle__ntent"><div data-ttid="BylWrapper" class="BylWrapper-KIudk irTIfE byl"><p class="ByleWrapper-jWHrLH dSEWiO byle byl__byle" data-ttid="ByleWrapper" emProp="thor" emType="><span emProp="name" class="ByleNamWrapper-jbHncj fuDQVo"><span data-ttid="ByleName" class="ByleName-kwmrLn cYaBaU byle__name"><span class="BaseWrap-sc-gjQpdd BaseText-ewhhUZ BylePreamble-iJolpQ iUEiRd jslZfG gnILss byle__preamble">By </span>Jsi Wter</span></span></p></div></div></div></div></div></div><div class="SummaryItemWrapper-iwvBff hNpSyX summary-em summary-em--ARTICLE summary-em--no-in summary-em--text-align-left summary-em--layout-placement-text-below summary-em--layout-posn-image-left summary-em--layout-proportns-50-50 summary-em--si-by-si-align-center summary-em--si-by-si-image-right-mobile-false summary-em--standard SummaryCollectnGridSummaryItem-WColm hKqhyj" role="button" tabx="0"><div class="SummaryItemAssetContaer-gwhFFH VOyg summary-em__asset-ntaer"><a class="SummaryItemImageLk-dshqxb cPpCwE summary-em__image-lk summary-em-trackg__image-lk" href=" aria-hidn="te" tabx="-1" data-ponent-type="recirc-river" data-recirc-id="em-image-3" data-recirc-pattern="summary-em" target="_self"><span class="SpanWrapper-umhxW kGxnNB rponsive-asset SummaryItemRponsiveAsset-hjGIGg bDvSkO summary-em__image"><div data-tt="aspect-rat-ntaer" class="AspectRatContaer-bJHpJz jMoLpX"><div class="aspect-rat--overlay-ntaer"><picture class="RponsiveImagePicture-cWuUZO dUOtEa SummaryItemRponsiveAsset-hjGIGg bDvSkO summary-em__image rponsive-image"><noscript><source media="(max-width: 767px)" srcSet=" 120w, 240w, 320w, 640w" siz="100vw"/><source media="(m-width: 768px)" srcSet=" 120w, 240w, 320w" siz="100vw"/><img alt="The Novelist Whose Inventns Went Too Far" class="RponsiveImageContaer-eybHBd fptoWY rponsive-image__image" src="></noscript></picture></div></div></span></a></div><div class="SummaryItemContent-eiDYMl XMZX summary-em__ntent"><div class="RubricWrapper-dKmCNX kImuKS bric bric--disvery SummaryItemRubric-dguGKN lapGFj summary-em__bric"><span class="RubricName-fVtemz cLxcNi">Life and Letters</span></div><a class="SummaryItemHedLk-civM dVrbhU summary-em-trackg__hed-lk summary-em__hed-lk" data-ponent-type="recirc-river" data-recirc-id="em-hed-3" data-recirc-pattern="summary-em" href=" target="_self"><div class="SummaryItemHedBase-hiFYpQ fzzTdh summary-em__hed" data-ttid="SummaryItemHed">The Novelist Whose Inventns Went Too Far</div></a><div class="BaseWrap-sc-gjQpdd BaseText-ewhhUZ SummaryItemDek-CRfsi iUEiRd kxnNhB jDyfzW summary-em__k">After the Ao-Cuban wrer H. G. Carrillo died, his hband learned that almost everythg the wrer had shared about his life was ma up—cludg his Cuban inty.</div><div class="SummaryItemByleWrapper-boCfbi cuRXdL summary-em__byle-date-in"><div class="SummaryItemBaseByle-fFbXkY cgDBtc summary-em__byle"><div class="summary-em__byle__ntent"><div data-ttid="BylWrapper" class="BylWrapper-KIudk irTIfE byl"><p class="ByleWrapper-jWHrLH dSEWiO byle byl__byle" data-ttid="ByleWrapper" emProp="thor" emType="><span emProp="name" class="ByleNamWrapper-jbHncj fuDQVo"><span data-ttid="ByleName" class="ByleName-kwmrLn cYaBaU byle__name"><span class="BaseWrap-sc-gjQpdd BaseText-ewhhUZ BylePreamble-iJolpQ iUEiRd jslZfG gnILss byle__preamble">By </span>D. T. Max</span></span></p></div></div></div></div></div></div><div class="SummaryItemWrapper-iwvBff hNpSyX summary-em summary-em--ARTICLE summary-em--no-in summary-em--text-align-left summary-em--layout-placement-text-below summary-em--layout-posn-image-left summary-em--layout-proportns-50-50 summary-em--si-by-si-align-center summary-em--si-by-si-image-right-mobile-false summary-em--standard SummaryCollectnGridSummaryItem-WColm hKqhyj" role="button" tabx="0"><div class="SummaryItemAssetContaer-gwhFFH VOyg summary-em__asset-ntaer"><a class="SummaryItemImageLk-dshqxb cPpCwE summary-em__image-lk summary-em-trackg__image-lk" href=" aria-hidn="te" tabx="-1" data-ponent-type="recirc-river" data-recirc-id="em-image-4" data-recirc-pattern="summary-em" target="_self"><span class="SpanWrapper-umhxW kGxnNB rponsive-asset SummaryItemRponsiveAsset-hjGIGg bDvSkO summary-em__image"><div data-tt="aspect-rat-ntaer" class="AspectRatContaer-bJHpJz jMoLpX"><div class="aspect-rat--overlay-ntaer"><picture 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Keeps Playg Carrie Bradshaw</div></a><div class="BaseWrap-sc-gjQpdd BaseText-ewhhUZ SummaryItemDek-CRfsi iUEiRd kxnNhB jDyfzW summary-em__k">In all of her profsnal enavors, cludg the “Sex and the Cy” anchise, Parker nsirs herself a “bter enr.”</div><div class="SummaryItemByleWrapper-boCfbi cuRXdL summary-em__byle-date-in"><div class="SummaryItemBaseByle-fFbXkY cgDBtc summary-em__byle"><div class="summary-em__byle__ntent"><div data-ttid="BylWrapper" class="BylWrapper-KIudk irTIfE byl"><p class="ByleWrapper-jWHrLH dSEWiO byle byl__byle" data-ttid="ByleWrapper" emProp="thor" emType="><span emProp="name" class="ByleNamWrapper-jbHncj fuDQVo"><span data-ttid="ByleName" class="ByleName-kwmrLn cYaBaU byle__name"><span class="BaseWrap-sc-gjQpdd BaseText-ewhhUZ BylePreamble-iJolpQ iUEiRd jslZfG gnILss byle__preamble">By </span>Rachel Syme</span></span></p></div></div></div></div></div></div><div class="AdWrapper-dQtivb fZrssQ SummaryCollectnGridSummaryItem-WColm hKqhyj ad ad--read-more"><div 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