How to say gay Malay

Contents:

• KUALA LUMPUR GAY TRAVEL
• GAY LANGKAWI, MALAYSIA | THE ESSENTIAL LGBT TRAVEL GUI!
• THE BEST KUALA LUMPUR GAY CLUBS & BARSGAY CLUBS & BARS KUALA LUMPUR
• MALAYSIA’S HIGHT COURT STRIK DOWN STATE GAY SEX BAN
• THE LIFE OF GAY PEOPLE MLIM MALAYSIA
• THE MALAYSIAN GAY MAN FIGHTG FOR HIS LIFE, AND MANY OTHER LGBT ASYLUM SEEKERSBRAVEIN MALAYSIA HE EXPERIENCED EXTREME HOMOPHOBIA AND WAS A VICTIM OF GANG VLENCE. NOW THIS ANONYMO ACTIVIST IS SEEKG ASYLUM THE U.S., WHILE HELPG OTHER LGBT ASYLUM SEEKERS.TIM TEEMANSENR EDOR AND WRERUPDATED NOV. 12, 2020 4:54PM EST / PUBLISHED AUG. 01, 2018 5:12AM EDT EXCLIVEPHOTO ILLTRATN BY THE DAILY BEAST/GETTYEDOR'S NOTE: IN 2019, WE REMOVED RMATN OM THIS TERVIEW AT THE REQUT OF THE SUBJECT DUE TO SAFETY NCERNS FOR HIS FAY.MOMENTS AFTER HE WAS QUEERBASHED BY A GANG, TWO WATCHG POLICEMAN TNTED THE MAN I AM SPEAKG TO WH THE POSSIBILY OF BEG ARRTED AND IMPRISONED, AND MURRED JAIL. ONE OF THOSE POLICEMEN THEN PHED HIM TO THE GROUND AND SPAT ON HIM. AT THE TIME HE WAS 15 YEARS OLD, WALKG OM HIS ALL-BOYS’ SCHOOL TO THE TRA STATN KUALA LUMPUR AT AROUND 3 O’CLOCK THE AFTERNOON ON HIS WAY HOME. THE GANG OF FOUR YOUNG MEN, ONE OM HIS CLASS AT SCHOOL, SURROUND HIM, LLG HIM “PONDAN,” MALAYSIAN SLANG FOR “FAGGOT.” TWO OF THE GANG PHYSILLY RTRAED HIM, WHILE THE OTHER TWO, ONE OF WHOM WAS A CLASSMATE OF HIS, BEAT HIM UP. “OBVLY, I WAS VERY SRED,” THE MAN RELLED A RECENT TERVIEW. “I SORT OF EXPECTED WAS GOG TO HAPPEN ONE DAY. I WAS ATTACKED AND TARGETED AT A MUCH YOUNGER AGE, PECIALLY STARTG OM THE AGE OF 13, BUT THE MOST TENSE ATTACK THAT I REMEMBER VIVIDLY WAS THE ATTACK BY GANG MEMBERS WHEN I WAS 15.” THERE IS SNT SUPPORT FOR LGBT YOUTH, OR LGBT EQUALY AND PEOPLE GENERALLY, MALAYSIA. PARENTS ARE ENURAGED TO SEND CHILDREN THEY SPECT OF BEG LGBT TO “NVERSN MPS,” AS THIS MAN LLS THEM. (HIS OWN PARENTS WERE ADVISED TO DO THE SAME.) BULLYG IS RIFE. SAME-SEX SEX IS ILLEGAL, AND LGBT PEOPLE WILY NMNED AND STIGMATIZED. THE MAN’S PARENTS BEAT HIM. TODAY, THE MAN I AM SPEAKG TO IS A UNIQUE SUATN: NOW 24 YEARS OLD AND BASED SAN FRANCIS, HE IS THE EARLY STAG OF APPLYG FOR ASYLUM THE UNED STAT AT THE SAME TIME AS HELPG LEAD ASYLUM CONNECT, A NONPROF THAT ADVOT FOR LGBT ASYLUM SEEKERS AND WHICH HAS BUILT AN ONLE ROURCE GUI TO HELP LGBT ASYLUM SEEKERS FD SAFE, HIGH-QUALY ROURC DURG THE U.S. ASYLUM PROCS. THE ANIZATN WAS -FOUND 2014 BY KATIE SGARRO AND GAY ASYLUM SEEKER SAYID ABDULLAEV AT THE UNIVERSY OF PENNSYLVANIA.THE SUPPORT THAT ASYLUM CONNECT OFFERS IS VAL. AS THE DAILY BEAST’S SAMANTHA ALLEN REPORTED APRIL, THERE ARE LARGE NUMBERS OF LGBT ASYLUM SEEKERS THE UNED STAT “WHO ARE STUCK A LARGE BACKLOG OF APPLITNS THAT HAS GROWN TO UNMANAGEABLE LEVELS UNR THE TMP ADMISTRATN.”THE STAK FOR THE MAN ARE HIGH. A RECENT EDORIAL HE WROTE, DOCUMENTG AND NMNG THE ANTI-LGBT LAWS AND HOMOPHOBIA OF HIS HOME UNTRY AND PUBLISHED PENNT MALAYSIAN MEDIA OUTLETS, WENT VIRAL, BRGG PRAISE AND NMNATN—AND, HE BELIEV, LEADG THE POLICE TO HIS FAY’S HOME KUALA LUMPUR TO LOOK FOR HIM. THIS MAN IS “TERRIFIED” FOR HIS LIFE IF HE IS PORTED BACK TO MALAYSIA, BUT HE IS TERMED TO KEEP SPEAKG UP OVER JTICE AND EQUALY AND HELPG OTHERS THROUGH HIS WORK AT ASYLUM CONNECT."GAY KIDS HAVE BEEN ROUTELY ATTACKED AND TARGETED," HE SAID. "AS A KID, I WAS GOG THROUGH SOMETHG MANY OTHER PEOPLE MIGHT HAVE EXPERIENCED BUT DID NOT HAVE THE URAGE TO TALK ABOUT. THAT DAY I WAS BEATEN UP I WAS VERY SRED, AND THEN WAS OVER."EXCEPT WASN'T. NEARBY THERE WAS A POLICE R, WH TWO OFFICERS SI. THEY HAD HEARD THE GANG LLG HIM "PONDAN," AND ONE OFFICER ASKED HIM WHAT WAS GOG ON. "OBVLY I WAS CRYG, VERY AAID. ONE OF THEM SAID, 'THAT GANG BEAT YOU UP BEE YOU ARE GAY.'"THE MAN TODAY SAID HE KNEW HE ULD NOT TELL THE OFFICERS HE WAS GAY. THE LONIAL-ERA CRIME OF SODOMY REMAS ILLEGAL MALAYSIA, AS DO "GROSS CENCY" BETWEEN MEN. TRANSGENR PEOPLE ARE SUBJECT TO "ASSLT, EXTORTN, AND VLATNS OF THEIR PRIVACY RIGHTS" BY POLICE, ACRDG TO A 2014 HUMAN RIGHTS WATCH REPORT. ACRDG TO HRW, "NUMERO SHARIA-BASED LAWS AND REGULATNS PROHIBG A 'MAN POSG AS A WOMAN,' SEXUAL RELATNS BETWEEN WOMEN, AND SEXUAL RELATNS BETWEEN MEN EFFECTIVELY CRIMALIZE LGBT PEOPLE."THE SENTENCE FOR THOSE FOUND GUILTY OF SODOMY, UNR 377A OF THE UNTRY'S PENAL , IS UP TO 20 YEARS PRISON AND WHIPPG. MOST LGBT PEOPLE MALAYSIA TRY TO STAY AS "VISIBLE AS POSSIBLE" TO AVOID POLICE TECTN, HOW SAID. "THEY STAY THE CLOSET. IT'S NOT SAFE TO E OUT."THE DAY HE WAS ATTACKED, THE MAN RELLED THAT ONE OF THE OFFICERS TOOK HIM BY THE LLAR AND SAID, "IS TE YOU ARE GAY? AND DO YOU KNOW WHAT THE NSEQUENC ARE IF YOU ARE?"TERRIFIED OF THE PS, THEIR TNTG, THEIR POWER AND HIS VULNERABILY, HE RPOND THAT HE WAS NOT GAY, THAT THERE HAD BEEN A MISUNRSTANDG AND THAT HE WAS TRYG TO GET HOME AFTER SCHOOL. “THE POLICEMAN WHO TOOK ME BY LLAR PHED ME TO THE GROUND AND SPAT ON ME. I REALIZED THEN WASN’T SAFE TO REMA MALAYSIA.” THE OTHER POLICEMAN LGHED AS THE YOUNG MAN WEPT. THE MAN SAW THE P HAD A GUN A HOLSTER AT HIS WAIST. THE P SAID, "IF WE ARRT YOU AND YOU GO TO JAIL, YOU ULD GET KILLED. IT ISN'T MON FOR THERE TO BE GAY MALAYSIANS PRISONS. THEY ULD BE SEXUALLY ASSLTED AND SOMETIM BEATEN TO ATH."THE YOUNG MAN REPEATED THAT HE WAS NOT GAY. THE PS ASKED FOR HIS ID. THEY TOOK DOWN HIS NAME AND FULL ADDRS. HE WAS LIVG WH HIS FAY AT THE TIME. THE POLICEMEN TOLD HIM THEY NOW HAD HIS TAILS, AND IF HE WAS "UGHT" AGA, HE KNEW WHAT THE NSEQUENC WOULD BE."THE POLICEMAN WHO TOOK ME BY LLAR PHED ME TO THE GROUND AND SPAT ON ME," THE MAN RELLED.THE THEN-TEENAGER WENT HOME. "I REALIZED THEN WASN'T SAFE TO REMA MALAYSIA." IN RELLG MALAYSIA'S MANY LGBT-RELATED FLASHPOTS, THE MAN RELLED THE LONG, PLEX SAGA AROUND FORMER PUTY PRIME MISTER ANWAR IBRAHIM, WHO WAS JAILED TWICE FOR SODOMY (AND WHO HAS NIED THE ALLEGATN). ROSLAND RAHMAN/GETTY "MALAYSIA IS AN ISLAMIC UNTRY, WHERE THE MAJORY POPULATN IS MLIM," SAID THE MAN. "EVEN IF YOU'RE NOT MLIM YOU HAVE TO OBEY THE VERY SAME LAWS. I HAD TO BE UT THAT ENVIRONMENT AND NOT GET TROUBLE WH POLICE." “THE BULLYG CLUD NAME-LLG AND TENSIFIED WHEN SOME OF MY CLASSMAT JOED GANGS THE CY WHICH ARE VERY HOMOPHOBIC AND TARGET YOUNG KIDS THEY THK ARE HOMOSEXUAL.” THAT IS WHY THE CINT AFTER THE BEATG HE TOOK WAS SO IGHTENG. "I KNEW I WAS GAY, I ULDN'T BE OPEN ABOUT . I WENT TO AN ALL-BOYS' HIGH SCHOOL. I KNEW THAT MAYBE THE WAY I BEHAVED SHOWED THAT WAS TE. THE OTHER KIDS THERE TARGETED ME. THE BULLYG CLUD NAME-LLG AND TENSIFIED WHEN SOME OF MY CLASSMAT JOED GANGS THE CY WHICH ARE VERY HOMOPHOBIC AND TARGET YOUNG KIDS THEY THK ARE HOMOSEXUAL."AS WELL AS THE CREASE ANTI-LGBT RHETORIC BY THE THORI MALAYSIA, THE MAN SPOKE ABOUT THE MISTRY OF HEALTH'S VATN TO MALAYSIANS TO PARTICIPATE A NATNAL VIO NTT 2017, ONE SPECIFIC TOPIC BEG "THE BT WAYS TO PREVENT HOMOSEXUALY." THERE ARE PUBLIC WORKSHOPS ON HOW TO DO THE SAME, HE SAID. EARLIER THIS YEAR, MALAYSIAN THORI BANNED OUT-LBIAN HONG KONG POP STAR DENISE HO OM PERFORMG THE UNTRY. IN AN EXTRAORDARY MOVE, FOREIGNERS WHO ARE LGBT, OR WHO N BE INTIFIED AS SUCH, HAVE ALSO BEEN FORBIDN OM ENTERG MALAYSIA. "THEY'RE NOT ONLY ATTACKG LOL CIZENS, NOW THEY WANT TO ARRT PEOPLE OM ALL OVER WORLD," SAID THE MAN. "THGS ARE ACTUALLY GETTG WORSE. I DON'T THK THGS ARE LIKELY TO IMPROVE MY LIFETIME UNFORTUNATELY."THE MAN SAID HE WAS BROUGHT UP A LOWER-MIDDLE-CLASS HOME; HIS FATHER WAS A BSMAN, HIS MOTHER A HOTEL BOOKG AGENT TURNED FULL-TIME HOEWIFE. HE WAS A MIDDLE CHILD WH OLR BROTHER AND YOUNGER SISTER. HIS FAY WAS NOT SUPPORTIVE OF HIM, ED QUE THE OPPOSE. AS A YOUNG BOY, THE MAN DIDN'T THK ABOUT HOW TO NFORM TO SOCIAL EXPECTATNS, AND WOULD RECEIVE ABE, "JT FOR ACTG MORE FEME." "WHEN I WAS YOUNGER THE ABE WAS MORE OM MY PARENTS," HE SAID. "MY DAD LIKED TO E A BELT AND THE GARN HOSE, MY MOM ED A REALLY LONG NE."WHY WERE THEY BEATG YOU, I ASKED."TO RRECT MY BEHAVR," SAID THE MAN.THE BEATGS HAD BEGUN, AGED 6, WH A HARD SLAP THE FACE OM HIS MOTHER. SHE HAD UGHT HIM DRSG UP HER CLOTH ("IT WAS JT DRSG UP, I WAS A LTLE KID"). HOW REALIZED HE WAS GAY EARLY, AROUND THE SAME AGE, OM WATCHG TV AND READG MAGAZ AND BOOKS. "I HAD A LOT OF CURSY AS A CHILD. WHEN MY BROTHER AND I WATCHED RTOONS HIS HERO WERE THE LEAD GUY. I ALWAYS LIKED THE FEMALE CHARACTERS." “MY FATHER TOLD ME, ‘I WILL NOT HAVE A “PONDAN” THE FAY. I WOULD RATHER NOT HAVE A SON THAN HAVE A “PONDAN” THE FAY.’ THEY MA VERY CLEAR WHERE THEY STOOD.” JT LIKE THE BULLI WHO BEAT HIM, THE MAN'S FATHER ALSO ED THE WORD "PONDAN," MEANG FAGGOT, ABOUT HIS OWN CHILD. "HE TOLD ME, 'I WILL NOT HAVE A 'PONDAN' THE FAY. I WOULD RATHER NOT HAVE A SON THAN HAVE A 'PONDAN' THE FAY,' DAD SAID. THEY MA VERY CLEAR WHERE THEY STOOD.""THEY WOULD SAY, 'START ACTG LIKE OTHER BOYS. WHY ARE YOU DOG THIS TO ? YOUR TEACHERS LLED AND SAID YOU MIGHT BE SENT TO THIS MP.'"HIS SCHOOL TEACHERS HAD NOTICED THE BULLYG THE MAN RECEIVED AT SCHOOL, AND—LIKE THE POLICE OFFICERS WHO WATCHED HIM GET BEATEN UP, THEN ADD TO HIS MISERY BY LLG HIS PARENTS, AND SUGGTG THAT THE EXTREMELY YOUNG KID, THEN AGED 7 TO 9, WOULD BENEF OM GOG TO A SEXUALY "NVERSN MP TO 'RRECT' MY BEHAVR."HIS PARENTS DIDN'T DO THIS; THEY SENT HIM TO ANOTHER SCHOOL. IT WASN'T BEE THEY OBJECTED TO THE IA OF THE MP. "IF YOU SEND YOUR SON TO A MP LIKE THAT BRGS ENORMO SHAME ONTO THE FAY," THE MAN SAID. "THERE WAS A LOT OF EMPHASIS BASED ON THE HONOR OF THE FAY, NOT THE DIVIDUAL. IF I WENT TO THE GAY NVERSN MP, WORD WOULD SPREAD PRETTY QUICKLY, PEOPLE WOULD KNOW, AND I WOULD BE AT RISK OF GETTG THROWN OUT OF THE HOE AND DISOWNED. I KNEW THE RISK, AND I KNEW I HAD TO START NFORMG JT TO SURVIVE."EVENTUALLY, HE HAD TO TRANSFER SCHOOLS TWICE. HIS PARENTS WOULD TELL HIM TO BEHAVE "NORMALLY, LIKE THE OTHER KIDS" AT THE NEW SCHOOL. HE WOULD TRY, BUT AFTER THE BEATG BY THE FOUR OTHER BOYS AND THE POLICE THREATS, "I KNEW I ULDN'T GO TO MY PARENTS AND SAY, 'I'VE EXPERIENCED ALL THIS. PLEASE HELP ME.' THEY THOUGHT THE BLAME WAS ALWAYS ON ME. 'WHY N'T HE JT MAN UP?'"THE MAN NEVER ME OUT TO HIS PARENTS, NEVER HAD A NVERSATN ABOUT ANY OF . "I WOULDN'T SAY ANYTHG. ANYTHG I WOULD SAY WOULD JT PROVOKE THEM. I WOULD JT SILENTLY ENDURE, AND SAY THAT I WOULDN'T DO AGA, EVEN THOUGH I HADN'T DONE ANYTHG ANYWAY."THE BULLYG AND BEATGS AT SCHOOL GOT WORSE AS THE MAN GOT OLR. WHEN HE WAS A TEENAGER, THE MALAYSIAN ERNMENT ENDORSED AN ANTI-LGBT MIL, ABNORMAL DIRE, WHICH SCHOOL PUPILS WERE TAKEN TO SEE. "ALL THE LGBTQ CHARACTERS WERE KILLED BY LIGHTNG AT THE END," THE MAN RELLED. HIS IENDS AT SCHOOL FOUND FUNNY, HE THOUGHT WAS HORRIBLE. "THAT'S HOW SYSTEMIC HOMOPHOBIA IS MALAYSIA," HE SAID. "IT'S NOT ONE-OFF, 'S THE WHOLE ERNMENT, THE WHOLE TN SYSTEM, THE WHOLE SOCIETY."THERE ARE NO POSIVE ROLE MOLS FOR LGBT YOUTH, NO OPTNS. EVEN STRAIGHT ALLI ARE PUT OFF OM VOICG SUPPORT BEE OF THE OPPROBRIUM THAT IS HEAPED UPON THEM SHOULD THEY DO SO, SAID THE MAN. THE MAN HAD CSH AT SCHOOL. HE SPENT A LOT OF TIME WH ANOTHER BOY WHO WAS TWO YEARS OLR THAN HIM. "THE RELATNSHIP WAS MOSTLY PLATONIC, BUT WAS CLEAR WE BOTH LIKED EACH OTHER. WE SPENT A LOT OF TIME TOGETHER. BUT AFTER I GOT BEATEN, THE VERY NEXT DAY I SAW HIM, HE HAD BIS ON HIS FACE. I TRIED TO TALK TO HIM, BUT HE WAS WH HIS IENDS. HE LLED ME A FAGGOT, AND TOLD ME TO STAY AWAY. I NNECTED THE DOTS. HE HAD BEEN ATTACKED AS WELL, AND WAS TRYG TO F . IT WAS THE LAST TIME I EVER TALKED TO HIM."THE FOLLOWG YEAR, HE HAD A IEND, ANOTHER CLASSMATE, WHO PUT LS EFFORT THAN THE MAN TO FTG . "HE WAS FLAMBOYANT. HE GOT ATTACKED. HIS PARENTS TRANSFERRED HIM TO ANOTHER SCHOOL, AND BEFORE THAT TRANSFER HE WAS SENT TO A NVERSN MP. AROUND THE SAME TIME, I HAD STARTED TRYG TO NFORM. “I HEARD HE HAD MTED SUICI. I WAS VASTATED, AND I RELATED TO HIM BEE AT THAT TIME I WAS THKG OF DOG THE SAME THG. I THOUGHT, ‘THAT ULD HAVE BEEN ME.’ THE ONLY DIFFERENCE WAS, HE CHOSE NOT TO SPENT AS MUCH ENERGY AS I HAD, TRYG TO ‘HI.’” "THIS BOY RETURNED TO SCHOOL. I TRIED TO TALK TO HIM, BUT HE WAS QUIET AND WHDRAWN. THEN HE MOVED TO THE NEW SCHOOL. THEN I HEARD HE HAD MTED SUICI. I WAS VASTATED, AND I RELATED TO HIM BEE AT THAT TIME I WAS THKG OF DOG THE SAME THG. I THOUGHT, 'THAT ULD HAVE BEEN ME.' THE ONLY DIFFERENCE WAS, HE CHOSE NOT TO SPENT AS MUCH ENERGY AS I HAD, TRYG TO 'HI.'""I HAD A SEVERE PRSN, AND DIDN'T HAVE SOMEONE TO GO TO FOR HELP," THE MAN SAID OF THE TIME HE NSIRED MTG SUICI HIMSELF. "I FELT VERY ALONE. I DIDN'T SEE A SOLUTN. I ULDN'T GO TO MY PARENTS. I DIDN'T ACTUALLY MAKE AN ACTUAL SUICI ATTEMPT, AND WHEN I THOUGHT ABOUT I WOULD TRY TO DISTRACT MYSELF BY DOG MORE PRODUCTIVE THGS, LIKE WRG. I HAD THGS PUBLISHED, I WON A FEW WRG PETNS."ALL AROUND HIM THE ANTI-GAY MSAGE WAS THE SAME. AS A TEEN, THE MAN HEARD LADY GAGA'S 'BORN THIS WAY,' WHICH BEME AN NER ANTHEM OF HOPE. BUT, HE SAID, HE ULDN'T NTEMPLATE THE POSSIBILY OF EVER BEG OUT. IN 2017, THE UNTRY EVEN PICKED A FIGHT WH DISNEY OVER A GAY-THEMED SCENE BETY AND THE BEAST (LATER BACKG DOWN OVER A THREAT TO CUT THE SCENE). WHEN THE MAN WAS 18 2011, HE PARTICIPATED A STREET MONSTRATN, LLG FOR FAIRER AND MORE MOCRATIC ELECTORAL PROCS MALAYSIA. HE WAS ABOUT TO APPLY FOR ENTRY TO LOL LLEG AND UNIVERSI. THE PROTT TURNED VLENT, HE SAID. THE POLICE AND THE ARY PLOYED TEAR GAS AND BEGAN BEATG PROTTERS. HE WNSED THE WHOLE THG, EVEN THOUGH HIS PARENTS HAD NOT WANTED HIM TO PARTICIPATE SE HE GOT ARRTED AND "BLACKLISTED" TERMS OF HIS UNIVERSY AMBNS, FUTURE EMPLOYMENT, HEALTHRE, AND HOG. THE ERNMENT ULD ALSO STOP YOU OM TRAVELG OUT OF THE UNTRY, HE NOTED.HE MANAGED TO GET HOME WHOUT GETTG ARRTED, AND WROTE AN SAY ABOUT THE MONSTRATN AND ELECTORAL PROCS. IT WAS PUBLISHED, WON A PRIZE, HIS NAME WAS REVEALED. ALL HIS APPLITNS FOR LOL LLEG WERE SUBSEQUENTLY REJECTED; SOME PHONE LLS, THOSE LLEG EXPLAED THE MAN'S NAME WAS ED ON A BLACKLIST. HE HAD WANTED TO STUDY LAW. "I THOUGHT WAS THE ONLY WAY THAT I ULD BE, THE FUTURE, SOME KD OF POSN TO CHANGE THGS MALAYSIA THE LONG TERM," HE SAID.HE HAD HOPED TO GET A SCHOLARSHIP. "I WAS OBVLY VASTATED. I HAD DONE WELL HIGH SCHOOL AND ULD NOT GO TO LLEGE."DETERMED TO FULFILL HIS POTENTIAL AND FD A MEANS OF PE, THE MAN APPLIED FOR LLEG THE U.K. AND U.S. WHICH OFFERED MER-BASED SCHOLARSHIPS. "I KNEW THEY WERE MY ONLY TICKET OUT OF THIS ENVIRONMENT," HE SAID. AT THE SAME TIME, HE OBSERVED THE WORSENG STATE OF LGBT RIGHTS MALAYSIA. "EXTREMIST RELIG GROUPS HAD GAED MUCH MORE PROMENCE, AND NSERVATIV WERE BEG MORE VOL THEIR VIEWS ON LGBTQ." “FOR ME, MY SAFETY AND SURVIVAL WERE A TOP PRRY RATHER THAN G OUT AND PUTTG MYSELF SUATN WHERE I WAS A TARGET, PROSECUTED, AND MY FUTURE STROYED.” THE MAN RECEIVED A SCHOLARSHIP TO STUDY THE U.S. AT THE TIME, THE YOUNG MAN WAS STILL CLOSETED. "FOR ME, MY SAFETY AND SURVIVAL WERE A TOP PRRY RATHER THAN G OUT AND PUTTG MYSELF A SUATN WHERE I WAS A TARGET, PROSECUTED, AND MY FUTURE STROYED."IN 2013, AGED 19, HE LEFT MALAYSIA TO STUDY ENOMICS AT AN AMERIN UNIVERSY. IT WAS HIS MUCH-WISHED-FOR NEW LIFE, THOUGH HE WAS STILL HEAVILY TRMATIZED."IT WAS A GREAT FOUR YEARS, BUT I SPENT A FAIR AMOUNT OF TIME WH THE LLEGE THERAPIST," SAID THE MAN. "I HAD A LOT OF ISSU TO UNRSTAND. I BLAMED MYSELF FOR WHO I WAS. I ASKED, 'WHY N'T I BE NORMAL?' I WASN'T ACCEPTG OF MYSELF. I DIDN'T KNOW I ULD BE.' I ED TO HAVE A LOT OF NIGHTMAR ABOUT WHAT HAD HAPPENED.'" “THE LONGER I AM AWAY, THE EASIER IS TO BE WHO I TLY AM SI. WHOUT ALL THE MENTAL AND PHYSIL HARASSMENT, I REALIZE ’S OK. I N JT BE WHO I AM.” IN HIS JUNR YEAR 2016, THE MAN ME TO NEW YORK CY TO DO AN TERNSHIP, AND MET, THROUGH APPS, THE FIRST OUT GAY MEN HE HAD EVER KNOWN. HE HAD HIS FIRST KISS: "IT DIDN'T FEEL FORCED OR UNNATURAL." (HE IS CURRENTLY SGLE, AND GOG ON DAT.) "I MET SO MANY GREAT, TERTG GAY MEN. I WENT TO THE STONEWALL INN, WHICH WAS SO HUGE FOR ME. I DIDN'T KNOW I WOULD EVER REACH THAT POT OF GOG TO THAT PLACE AND BEG PROUD OF WHO I AM. BUT I DID ."THE BREAKTHROUGH, SAID THE MAN, WAS BEG AWAY OM MALAYSIA, "AND THE LONGER I AM AWAY, THE EASIER IS TO BE WHO I TLY AM SI. WHOUT ALL THE MENTAL AND PHYSIL HARASSMENT, I REALIZE 'S OK. I N JT BE WHO I AM."IN 2016 HE ATTEND HIS FIRST PRI MARCH FOR THE FIRST TIME NEW YORK. "HILLARY CLTON WAS THERE THAT YEAR. THERE WERE SO MANY PEOPLE HAPPY WH WHO THEY WERE. I FELT THE SAME. I ULD FALLY BE WHO I WAS. IT FELY HELPED MY OWN ACCEPTANCE." THE MAN BEGAN THE PROCS OF APPLYG FOR ASYLUM LAST NOVEMBER. HE HAS A WORK PERM. HE'S AMASSG SUPPORTG LETTERS FOR HIS APPLITN, AND IS AWAG A DATE FOR HIS ASYLUM TERVIEW.HE MISS HIS IENDS AND THE FOOD OF MALAYSIA. BUT HE DON'T MISS HOW OPPRSIVE THE ENVIRONMENT WAS. "I DON'T MISS THE THGS I WENT THROUGH, THE ERNMENT, THE MEDIA. THAT'S WHY I MA THE CISN TO BEE A LTLE MORE PUBLIC ON WHERE I STAND. MANY ASYLUM SEEKERS E TO THIS UNTRY, WHOUT ACCS TO ANY EFUL ROURC."THE MAN'S VIRAL POLEMIC ATTRACTED HUNDREDS OF MENTS. A PROFSOR AT AN ISLAMIC UNIVERSY MALAYSIA REPOSTED , AND SAID THE MAN WAS WRONG, WHICH LED TO THE PROFSOR'S FOLLOWERS POSTG HATEFUL MENTS, CLUDG ENURAGG THE MAN TO KILL HIMSELF. "THEY'VE ALSO TOLD ME NOT TO RETURN TO MALAYSIA, THAT 'THIS UNTRY DON'T NEED SOMEONE LIKE YOU.'"THE MAN DID NOT RPOND TO HIS CRICS. HE ALSO HEARD OM LGBT MALAYSIANS, GRATEFUL TO HEAR AN ALL-TOO-RARE VOICE OF SUPPORT—SUCH AS OM A TRANSGENR MAN GETTG THROWN OUT OF HIS HOME BY UNACCEPTG PARENTS. HE ASKED THE MAN WHAT SHOULD HE DO; THE MAN PASSED ON WHAT EFUL NTACTS HE HAD, WHICH WERE NOT MANY. THE ONLY EFUL NONPROF, HE SAID, WAS THE AIDS-BASED PT FOUNDATN. THERE ARE NO LGBT-SPECIFIC ANIZATNS.THE MAN ALSO HEARD OM A GAY MAN WHO HAD HAD SEX WH ANOTHER MAN WHO WAS NOW BLACKMAILG HIM, "SAYG IF HE DON'T GIVE HIM ALL HIS MONEY HE'LL REPORT HIM TO THE POLICE, WHICH ULD LEAD TO THIS MAN GOG TO JAIL. THERE ARE LGBT PEOPLE MALAYSIA EXPERIENCG SUCH PERSECUTN AND HARASSMENT."THE MAN IS NOT OUT TO HIS PARENTS, EVEN IF THE EDORIAL THAT WAS PUBLISHED EFFECTIVELY OUTED HIM. HE SAID THEY ARE NOT TECH-SAVVY AND HAD NOT SEEN . HIS BROTHER, HOWEVER, HAS BEEN LEFT "VERY NCERNED. EVEN THOUGH HE DON'T NECSARILY SUPPORT OR AGREE WH ME, HE KNEW THAT WE NNOT LET OUR PARENTS KNOW BEE THE NSEQUENCE WOULD THAT I WOULD GET DISOWNED. HE'S TRYG HIS BT TO KEEP THGS QUIET."HOWEVER, A FEW MONTHS AGO, JT AFTER THE ARTICLE WAS PUBLISHED, TWO POLICE OFFICERS ME TO THE FAY HOME. THE MAN'S BROTHER WAS THERE ALONE. THEY ASKED WHERE THE MAN WAS. HIS BROTHER TOLD THEM HE WAS NOT LIVG THERE. THEY TOLD HIM TO LET THEM KNOW IF THE MAN EVER RETURNED TO MALAYSIA."THAT'S WHEN I REALIZED I'D PUT MYSELF DANGER BY WRG A SIMPLE ARTICLE. I DIDN'T THK WAS THAT BIG A AL. I WASN'T NAMG PUBLIC OFFICIALS. I FELT BAD ABOUT MY BROTHER BEG ROPED TO A SUATN HE SHOULDN'T HAVE BEEN THE FIRST PLACE. HE'S ABOUT TO START HIS OWN FAY." THE MAN THOUGHT ABOUT WRG A SEND EDORIAL, BUT HASN'T—YET AT LEAST—BEE OF HOW WOULD AFFECT HIS FAY."I TOLD MY BROTHER THERE'S NOTHG THEY N DO, BEE I AM HERE," SAID THE MAN. HE FELT HIS FAY HAD NOTHG TO FEAR BEE THEY HAVE MTED NO CRIME. "I'M THE ONE WHO HAS MTED 'A CRIME,'" SAID THE MAN, RAISG HIS FGERS AS QUOTATN MARKS AROUND THE LAST TWO WORDS. “THE DANGERS HAVE BEE EVEN MORE REAL. THAT JT SPIR ME TO DO MORE WORK WH ASYLUM CONNECT BEE WHAT WE DO CREAT SO MUCH IMPACT. I KNOW THAT THERE ARE A LOT OF PEOPLE OUT THERE DIFFERENT UNTRI WHO ARE UNFORTUNATELY STILL PERSECUTED, AND I WANT TO DO ALL I N TO PROVI SAFE ROURC FOR THEM.” THE POSSIBILY THAT HIS APPLITN FOR ASYLUM WOULD BE NIED IS "IGHTENG. IT'S DIFFERENT IF THE ERNMENT DON'T KNOW WHO YOU ARE, AND YOU N JT GO BACK ANONYMOLY. BUT 'S NOT A GREAT LIFE THE CLOSET. AND NOW I'VE OUTED MYSELF WH MY ROLE AT ASYLUM CONNECT. THE DANGERS HAVE BEE EVEN MORE REAL. THAT JT SPIR ME TO DO MORE WORK WH ASYLUM CONNECT BEE WHAT WE DO CREAT SO MUCH IMPACT. I KNOW THAT THERE ARE A LOT OF PEOPLE OUT THERE DIFFERENT UNTRI WHO ARE UNFORTUNATELY STILL PERSECUTED, AND I WANT TO DO ALL I N TO PROVI SAFE ROURC FOR THEM."HIS SE OF PERSECUTN IS WELL-DOCUMENTED, HE SAID. THE THORI HERE N SEE THE DANGERS HE FAC MALAYSIA, AS WELL AS WHAT THE GENERAL LGBTQ POPUL FAC THERE.THE TMP ADMISTRATN'S RHETORIC AND PRACTICE AROUND ASYLUM SEEKERS AND MIGRANTS—AND TOWARDS LGBT PEOPLE—HAS BEEN "STRSFUL" FOR THE MAN TO OBSERVE AS HE HAS MA HIS APPLITN FOR ASYLUM. BUT HE IS STILL TERMED TO FIGHT FOR LGBT ASYLUM SEEKERS, EVEN WHILE HE IS ONE HIMSELF."I HAVE A PERSONAL NNECTN TO . I UNRSTAND THEIR PA AND WHERE THEY'RE G OM BEE I WAS ASYLUM CONNECT'S TARGET DIENCE MYSELF. I ED THEIR TALOG OF ROURC WHEN I ARRIVED HERE. NOW I LIVE A UNTRY WHERE I N BE SAFE. I'M SPEAKG OM A PLACE OF PRIVILEGE JT BY LIVG HERE NOW."THE MAN IS SPIRED BY NEW YORK CY PRI MARCH DIRECTOR JULIAN SANJIVAN, ALSO OM MALAYSIA, WHO SUCCSFULLY APPLIED FOR ASYLUM HERE. "THE FACT HE IS SO VISIBLE IS GREAT, AND THAT HE HAS NO DOUBTS ABOUT BEG SO VISIBLE. HE SHOWS HOW IMPORTANT IS TO SPEAK OUT, TO BE A VOICE FOR PEOPLE WHO DON'T HAVE THAT VOICE."THE MAN HAS VOLUNTEERED FOR ASYLUM CONNECT FOR ALMOST A YEAR AND A HALF. AS WELL AS SEEKG DONATNS FOR THEIR WORK, THE GROUP ALSO IS ALSO LOOKG FOR STAFF AND VOLUNTEERS. THEIR CLIENTS, SAID THE MAN, ARE SEEKG TO PE LGBT PERSECUTN MIDDLE EASTERN UNTRI LIKE IRAN AND IRAQ, OM AIN UNTRI LIKE UGANDA AND ETHPIA, OM RSIA, AND OM ASIAN UNTRI LIKE INDONIA, PAKISTAN, AND MALAYSIA.THE SPECIAL ISSU LGBT ASYLUM SEEKERS FACE ARE CENTERED AROUND THE PERSECUTN THEY HAVE FACED BEE OF THEIR SEXUALY OR GENR INTY. ASYLUM CONNECT HELPS NNECT THEM WH THE BT LEGAL AND OTHER REPRENTATN. AS WH THE MAN HIMSELF, MANY LGBT ASYLUM SEEKERS ARE HEAVILY TRMATIZED BEE OF EXPERIENC THEIR HOME UNTRI. THE BAR IS "GETTG HIGHER" THE U.S., SAID THE MAN; MANY ASYLUM SEEKERS TRY TO ENTER MORE ACCEPTG, PRO-LGBT UNTRI LIKE CANADA AND THOSE WH EUROPE. THE MAN REMAS QUIETLY OPTIMISTIC. HE GRADUATED OM UNIVERSY LAST MAY, MOVED TO SAN FRANCIS, AND GOT A JOB WORKG MERCIAL REAL TATE. HE HAS VOLUNTEERED FOR SAN FRANCIS PRI, "AND FOUND A MUNY THAT IS VERY ACCEPTG, THAT IS NOT JT TOLERATED BUT CELEBRATED. EVERY JUNE THE WHOLE CY CELEBRAT PRI. THIS YEAR I MARCHED PRI, WHICH I WOULD NEVER HAVE IMAGED DOG A UPLE OF YEARS AGO—MARCHG ONE OF THE LARGT PRI PARAS THE WORLD. "I'M THRILLED TO MEET PEOPLE WHO ARE VERY PASSNATE ABOUT SOCIAL ISSU. AT THE SAME TIME THEY UNRSTAND BEG GAY SAN FRANCIS IS A PRIVILEGE. WE GET TO ENJOY CERTA THGS MANY PEOPLE DON'T OTHER PARTS OF THE UNTRY, AND OTHER PARTS OF THE WORLD, DO NOT. I'M VERY AWARE OF THAT." “WHEN THGS BEE VERY DIFFICULT, YOU TRY TO FD WAYS TO BE ROURCEFUL AND SURVIVE THAT ENVIRONMENT. THAT QUALY IS WHAT MAK THE LGBT MUNY SO WONRFUL. IT’S WHY WE NTUE TO TRY AND MAKE PROGRS.” THE MAN ADD QUIETLY, "THE LIFE I'M LIVG NOW IS SO DIFFERENT OM THE LIFE I HAD THE PAST. WHEN I LOOK BACK I REALIZE I HAD SOMETHG SIAR MON WH LGBTQ PEOPLE WHO EXPERIENCE PERSECUTN: A SENSE OF RILIENCE. WHEN THGS BEE VERY DIFFICULT, YOU TRY TO FD WAYS TO BE ROURCEFUL AND SURVIVE THAT ENVIRONMENT. THAT QUALY IS WHAT MAK THE LGBT MUNY SO WONRFUL. IT'S WHY WE NTUE TO TRY AND MAKE PROGRS."DO HE FEAR FOR HIS LIFE IF SENT BACK TO MALAYSIA? "ABSOLUTELY, PECIALLY WH THE BACKLASH AGAST THE ARTICLE I WROTE," THE MAN SAID. “STAY STRONG AND DO WHATEVER YOU N TO SURVIVE AND NOT PUT YOURSELF DANGER. THAT SHOULD BE YOUR PRRY BEE UNFORTUNATELY TO BE OUT IS IMPOSSIBLE. KNOW THAT THERE ARE PEOPLE LIKE ME WHO ARE SPEAKG OUT.” FROM AFAR, THE MAN HOP TO MPAIGN FOR CHANGE MALAYSIA. THE EDORIAL HE PUBLISHED CERTALY CREATED AN IMPACT. "I WANT TO MAKE SURE THE ERNMENT AND PUBLIC OFFICIALS KNOW THAT WHAT DO TO LGBTQ PEOPLE IS WRONG. I HOPE I N FD A WAY TO HELP UNRAVEL THE LAWS PLACE THAT PERSECUTE THE LGBTQ MUNY, AND THE WAY TO DO THAT OM THIS UNTRY IS TO MAKE SURE THE ERNMENT KNOWS HOW WRONG THE LAWS ARE, AND HOW SHOULD DO BETTER TO GIVE LGBTQ PEOPLE BASIC PROTECTNS."TO ANY LGBT MALAYSIANS READG THIS, THE MAN SAID: "STAY STRONG AND DO WHATEVER YOU N TO SURVIVE AND NOT PUT YOURSELF DANGER. THAT SHOULD BE YOUR PRRY BEE UNFORTUNATELY TO BE OUT IS IMPOSSIBLE. KNOW THAT THERE ARE PEOPLE LIKE ME WHO ARE SPEAKG OUT."IF HIS APPLITN FOR ASYLUM IS GRANTED, THE MAN WOULD LIKE TO GO TO BS OR LAW SCHOOL, AND CREATE A REER OM THAT. HE'D LIKE TO EXPAND HIS VOLUNTEERG WH ASYLUM CONNECT, BOTH NATNALLY AND TERNATNALLY."THIS IS SO PERSONAL TO ME," SAID THE MAN. "I'M WILLG TO RISK GETTG TARGETED. I EXPERIENCED PERSECUTN PECIALLY AT A YOUNG AGE, WHEN I DID NOT HAVE A ROLE MOL OR SOMEONE I ULD TALK TO TO HELP. I REALIZE HOW IMPORTANT ROLE MOLS ARE, AND AN AWARENS THAT THERE IS SOMEONE OUT THERE LIKE ME ABLE TO SPEAK MY MD. "LGBTQ YOUTH MALAYSIA ARE AT RISK OF PRSN AND SUICI. I THK THE WORK I DO ULD BE VERY IMPACTFUL IF I DO MY BT TO MAKE THOSE PEOPLE REALIZE THAT THGS MAY BE BAD, BUT YOU HAVE SO MUCH POWER TO SURVIVE AND THRIVE. BY DOG THIS WORK, I KNOW THE TRMA I WENT THROUGH WAS WORTH SOME WAY."TO THE YOUNGER GAY KID VERSN OF HIMSELF, THE 24-YEAR-OLD ONE WOULD SAY: "DON'T BE SO PRSED. I KNOW THGS ARE HARD, BUT YOU'RE STRONGER THAN YOU THK, EVEN THOUGH YOU DON'T HAVE SOMEONE YOU ULD TURN TO. YOU'LL SUCCEED WHATEVER YOU DO. STAY STRONG." “EVERYTHG IS AT STAKE. MY LIFE, MY LIVELIHOOD, MY JOB, MY ABILY TO BE MYSELF AND BE HAPPY AND NOT BE ATTACKED. IT’S A HUGE PRSURE. IT KEEPS YOU ON YOUR TO. YOU’RE SUCH A VULNERABLE POSN. EVERYTHG N BE TAKEN AWAY A SEND IF YOU DON’T FIGHT FOR .” VERY QUIETLY, THE MAN SAID THAT HE IS VOLVED A "FIGHT FOR MY LIFE. I'M ALWAYS SURVIVAL MO. I N'T MAKE ANY MISTAK. EVERYTHG IS AT STAKE. MY LIFE, MY LIVELIHOOD, MY JOB, MY ABILY TO BE MYSELF AND BE HAPPY AND NOT BE ATTACKED. IT'S A HUGE PRSURE. IT KEEPS YOU ON YOUR TO. YOU'RE SUCH A VULNERABLE POSN. EVERYTHG N BE TAKEN AWAY A SEND IF YOU DON'T FIGHT FOR ."WHICH MAK EVEN MORE IMPRSIVE THAT, AS WELL AS FIGHTG FOR HIMSELF, THE MAN IS DITED TO FIGHTG FOR OTHERS.TO THE MAN SIMPLY FEELS THE RIGHT THG TO DO. "BEG SOMEONE WHO HAS EXPERIENCED PERSECUTN, I KNOW HOW IMPORTANT IS TO FIGHT NOT JT FOR MYSELF BUT FOR OTHER PEOPLE TOO." TIM TEEMAN
• GAY MALAYSIA
• HOW TO SAY GAY MALAY
• GAY MALAYSIA: MORN KUALA LUMPUR

KUALA LUMPUR GAY TRAVEL

Tucked away off the Eastern ast of Malaysia near Thailand, Langkawi is more liberal and relaxed than the rt of Malaysia, as gay travelers will soon notice – and is probably a large reason why Gay Langkawi is popular wh LGBT travelers. You will be weled almost everywhere you go: bars, clubs, and rtrants and will surely have no issu any of the upsle rorts; however, jt be aware you will not fd a gay scene anywhere near as bizarre as that Kuala Lumpur, as crazy as Ho Chi Mh Cy or as open and hedonistic as nearby Phet if that is your ma ncern. Many Malaysians still hold nservative attus to any display of public affectn – straight or gay – although people here are surprisgly open-md, pecially more trendy, upsle areas.

Note: Malaysia retas a Brish lony-era crimal ban on sodomy, poorly fed but clus both heterosexual and homosexual acts, wh punishment rangg om f to prison sentenc of up to twenty years and even rporal punishment. Bee gay life Langkawi maly occurs onle, at night and behd closed doors, many of the attractns Langkawi durg the day that gay travelers will want to see are the top attractns here anyway. One of the bt tips we n give you for explorg Gay Langkawi is to pre-orr a travel SIM rd for easy airport pickup and activatn the moment you arrive, so you will not pay a fortune ternatnal roamg charg.

Get rtrants remendatn and rervatns on the fly, public transport stctns up to the mute, bar openg hours and, if is your thg – accs to gay hook-up apps to fd out more about the lol scene.

GAY LANGKAWI, MALAYSIA | THE ESSENTIAL LGBT TRAVEL GUI!

Gay travelers  Langkawi should take special re regardg public displays of affectn where many rints may be ls exposed to LGBT culture and likely hold nservative attus…Malaysian people fd this very embarrassg, even wh heterosexual upl. Perfect for startg a night off Gay Langkawi, wns the tropil sun dip below the wtern horizon of the Andaman and maybe even tch a glimpse of flyg fish, dolphs and graceful eagl while you are at .

THE BEST KUALA LUMPUR GAY CLUBS & BARSGAY CLUBS & BARS KUALA LUMPUR

Sadly there is no such thg as an openly gay bar Malaysia – this uld lead to ser problems for the owners of the bar, cludg havg their license revoked, but there are plac that are well-known the lol LGBT muny as ‘gay-iendly hangout’.

MALAYSIA’S HIGHT COURT STRIK DOWN STATE GAY SEX BAN

EDINBURGH AND THE SCOTTISH HIGHLANDS BY TRAIN Traverse Stland’s most scenic landsp, om wt ast to east, travellg by rail View Trip “I have nsired movg to a different untry that’s more faiar wh the LGBT muny, pecially wh legalized gay marriage, ” she says.

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an Ormond HotelThgs to do near MoMo's Kuala LumpurThgs to do near MiCasa All Sue HotelThgs to do near Le Méridien Kuala LumpurThgs to do near Sunway Velocy HotelThgs to do near Four Seasons Hotel Kuala LumpurThgs to do near Sunway Putra HotelThgs to do near Sofel Kuala Lumpur DamansaraThgs to do near 8 Kia Peng SuThgs to do near Days Hotel and Su by Wyndham Fraser Bs Park KLThgs to do near Four Pots by Sheraton Kuala Lumpur, ChatownThgs to do near Grand Hyatt Kuala LumpurUptown Maharani MuarTrickeye MmChang Phuak Gate (The Elephant Gate)Cat Cafe Mocha AkihabaraPanda WorldFalls Creek Alpe RortHarbor LandRoyal MileDaegwallyeong Sky RanchM MallSelf-Guid Full Day Round-trip From BergenMalaysia Fishg Charter: Port Klang Multiple Spots Recreatnal FishgPhang Nga Bay & Jam Bond Island wh Canoeg By Big Boat From PhetTsumago and Magome Kiso Valley one day tour om Nagoya wh a private van3-Days Trip om Marrakech to Chefchaouen via Imperial ciBali Fast TrackPrivate Full Day Tour of Ban Downtown & Northern Part Highlights1 Day Balik Pul pt om town area by motorachDelphi One Day Trip om Athens wh Pickup and Optnal LunchDner at Penang Hill Includg Tra RiRtrantsFlightsHoliday RentalsTravel StoriCisCar HireToursAdd a PlaceTravel FomAirlTravel GuisHelp CentreAsiaMalaysiaWilayah PersekutuanKuala LumpurKuala Lumpur AttractnsGay Bars Kuala LumpurGay Clubs & Bars Kuala LumpurAll thgs to doCategory typAttractnsToursDay TripsOutdoor ActiviConcerts & ShowsFood & DrkEventsShoppgTransportatnTraveller RourcTyp of AttractnsNightlifeNightlifeBars & ClubsBar, Club & Pub ToursDance Clubs & DissKaraoke BarsGay Clubs & BarsComedy ClubsCigar BarsJazz Clubs & BarsWe BarsGood forGood for CouplBudget-iendlyGood for KidsGood for Big GroupsHoneymoon spotGood for Adrenale SeekersHidn GemsFree EntryAdventuroGood for a Ray Day3 plac sorted by traveller favourClear all filters1. OMG Bistro & PubGay Bars • Karaoke BarsFrequently Asked Qutns about Kuala LumpurThe plac are bt for gay clubs & bars Kuala Lumpur:OMG Bistro & PubBlue Boy ClubNakd BarSee more gay clubs & bars Kuala Lumpur on Tripadvisor. The se aris om a 2018 raid on a private rince Selangor, which state relig enforcement officials arrted 11 men on charg of “attemptg” gay sex, unr sectn 28 of Selangor’s Syariah (Sharia, or Islamic law) crimal enactment.

THE LIFE OF GAY PEOPLE MLIM MALAYSIA

I like to go to the gay clubs KL, like Blue Boy B Btang (that’s a really old, n-down place, but has survived the bt and worst of tim, unlike many other flash--the-pan gay clubs KL). It created an uproar among people as the puty mister, who also lnched the event, agreed to the topics at the talk, one of which was that gay men uld be intified by a penchant for wearg V-neck T-shirts, rryg large handbags, wearg light-loured outfs, and sleevels shirts.

THE MALAYSIAN GAY MAN FIGHTG FOR HIS LIFE, AND MANY OTHER LGBT ASYLUM SEEKERSBRAVEIN MALAYSIA HE EXPERIENCED EXTREME HOMOPHOBIA AND WAS A VICTIM OF GANG VLENCE. NOW THIS ANONYMO ACTIVIST IS SEEKG ASYLUM THE U.S., WHILE HELPG OTHER LGBT ASYLUM SEEKERS.TIM TEEMANSENR EDOR AND WRERUPDATED NOV. 12, 2020 4:54PM EST / PUBLISHED AUG. 01, 2018 5:12AM EDT EXCLIVEPHOTO ILLTRATN BY THE DAILY BEAST/GETTYEDOR'S NOTE: IN 2019, WE REMOVED RMATN OM THIS TERVIEW AT THE REQUT OF THE SUBJECT DUE TO SAFETY NCERNS FOR HIS FAY.MOMENTS AFTER HE WAS QUEERBASHED BY A GANG, TWO WATCHG POLICEMAN TNTED THE MAN I AM SPEAKG TO WH THE POSSIBILY OF BEG ARRTED AND IMPRISONED, AND MURRED JAIL. ONE OF THOSE POLICEMEN THEN PHED HIM TO THE GROUND AND SPAT ON HIM. AT THE TIME HE WAS 15 YEARS OLD, WALKG OM HIS ALL-BOYS’ SCHOOL TO THE TRA STATN KUALA LUMPUR AT AROUND 3 O’CLOCK THE AFTERNOON ON HIS WAY HOME. THE GANG OF FOUR YOUNG MEN, ONE OM HIS CLASS AT SCHOOL, SURROUND HIM, LLG HIM “PONDAN,” MALAYSIAN SLANG FOR “FAGGOT.” TWO OF THE GANG PHYSILLY RTRAED HIM, WHILE THE OTHER TWO, ONE OF WHOM WAS A CLASSMATE OF HIS, BEAT HIM UP. “OBVLY, I WAS VERY SRED,” THE MAN RELLED A RECENT TERVIEW. “I SORT OF EXPECTED WAS GOG TO HAPPEN ONE DAY. I WAS ATTACKED AND TARGETED AT A MUCH YOUNGER AGE, PECIALLY STARTG OM THE AGE OF 13, BUT THE MOST TENSE ATTACK THAT I REMEMBER VIVIDLY WAS THE ATTACK BY GANG MEMBERS WHEN I WAS 15.” THERE IS SNT SUPPORT FOR LGBT YOUTH, OR LGBT EQUALY AND PEOPLE GENERALLY, MALAYSIA. PARENTS ARE ENURAGED TO SEND CHILDREN THEY SPECT OF BEG LGBT TO “NVERSN MPS,” AS THIS MAN LLS THEM. (HIS OWN PARENTS WERE ADVISED TO DO THE SAME.) BULLYG IS RIFE. SAME-SEX SEX IS ILLEGAL, AND LGBT PEOPLE WILY NMNED AND STIGMATIZED. THE MAN’S PARENTS BEAT HIM. TODAY, THE MAN I AM SPEAKG TO IS A UNIQUE SUATN: NOW 24 YEARS OLD AND BASED SAN FRANCIS, HE IS THE EARLY STAG OF APPLYG FOR ASYLUM THE UNED STAT AT THE SAME TIME AS HELPG LEAD ASYLUM CONNECT, A NONPROF THAT ADVOT FOR LGBT ASYLUM SEEKERS AND WHICH HAS BUILT AN ONLE ROURCE GUI TO HELP LGBT ASYLUM SEEKERS FD SAFE, HIGH-QUALY ROURC DURG THE U.S. ASYLUM PROCS. THE ANIZATN WAS -FOUND 2014 BY KATIE SGARRO AND GAY ASYLUM SEEKER SAYID ABDULLAEV AT THE UNIVERSY OF PENNSYLVANIA.THE SUPPORT THAT ASYLUM CONNECT OFFERS IS VAL. AS THE DAILY BEAST’S SAMANTHA ALLEN REPORTED APRIL, THERE ARE LARGE NUMBERS OF LGBT ASYLUM SEEKERS THE UNED STAT “WHO ARE STUCK A LARGE BACKLOG OF APPLITNS THAT HAS GROWN TO UNMANAGEABLE LEVELS UNR THE TMP ADMISTRATN.”THE STAK FOR THE MAN ARE HIGH. A RECENT EDORIAL HE WROTE, DOCUMENTG AND NMNG THE ANTI-LGBT LAWS AND HOMOPHOBIA OF HIS HOME UNTRY AND PUBLISHED PENNT MALAYSIAN MEDIA OUTLETS, WENT VIRAL, BRGG PRAISE AND NMNATN—AND, HE BELIEV, LEADG THE POLICE TO HIS FAY’S HOME KUALA LUMPUR TO LOOK FOR HIM. THIS MAN IS “TERRIFIED” FOR HIS LIFE IF HE IS PORTED BACK TO MALAYSIA, BUT HE IS TERMED TO KEEP SPEAKG UP OVER JTICE AND EQUALY AND HELPG OTHERS THROUGH HIS WORK AT ASYLUM CONNECT."GAY KIDS HAVE BEEN ROUTELY ATTACKED AND TARGETED," HE SAID. "AS A KID, I WAS GOG THROUGH SOMETHG MANY OTHER PEOPLE MIGHT HAVE EXPERIENCED BUT DID NOT HAVE THE URAGE TO TALK ABOUT. THAT DAY I WAS BEATEN UP I WAS VERY SRED, AND THEN WAS OVER."EXCEPT WASN'T. NEARBY THERE WAS A POLICE R, WH TWO OFFICERS SI. THEY HAD HEARD THE GANG LLG HIM "PONDAN," AND ONE OFFICER ASKED HIM WHAT WAS GOG ON. "OBVLY I WAS CRYG, VERY AAID. ONE OF THEM SAID, 'THAT GANG BEAT YOU UP BEE YOU ARE GAY.'"THE MAN TODAY SAID HE KNEW HE ULD NOT TELL THE OFFICERS HE WAS GAY. THE LONIAL-ERA CRIME OF SODOMY REMAS ILLEGAL MALAYSIA, AS DO "GROSS CENCY" BETWEEN MEN. TRANSGENR PEOPLE ARE SUBJECT TO "ASSLT, EXTORTN, AND VLATNS OF THEIR PRIVACY RIGHTS" BY POLICE, ACRDG TO A 2014 HUMAN RIGHTS WATCH REPORT. ACRDG TO HRW, "NUMERO SHARIA-BASED LAWS AND REGULATNS PROHIBG A 'MAN POSG AS A WOMAN,' SEXUAL RELATNS BETWEEN WOMEN, AND SEXUAL RELATNS BETWEEN MEN EFFECTIVELY CRIMALIZE LGBT PEOPLE."THE SENTENCE FOR THOSE FOUND GUILTY OF SODOMY, UNR 377A OF THE UNTRY'S PENAL , IS UP TO 20 YEARS PRISON AND WHIPPG. MOST LGBT PEOPLE MALAYSIA TRY TO STAY AS "VISIBLE AS POSSIBLE" TO AVOID POLICE TECTN, HOW SAID. "THEY STAY THE CLOSET. IT'S NOT SAFE TO E OUT."THE DAY HE WAS ATTACKED, THE MAN RELLED THAT ONE OF THE OFFICERS TOOK HIM BY THE LLAR AND SAID, "IS TE YOU ARE GAY? AND DO YOU KNOW WHAT THE NSEQUENC ARE IF YOU ARE?"TERRIFIED OF THE PS, THEIR TNTG, THEIR POWER AND HIS VULNERABILY, HE RPOND THAT HE WAS NOT GAY, THAT THERE HAD BEEN A MISUNRSTANDG AND THAT HE WAS TRYG TO GET HOME AFTER SCHOOL. “THE POLICEMAN WHO TOOK ME BY LLAR PHED ME TO THE GROUND AND SPAT ON ME. I REALIZED THEN WASN’T SAFE TO REMA MALAYSIA.” THE OTHER POLICEMAN LGHED AS THE YOUNG MAN WEPT. THE MAN SAW THE P HAD A GUN A HOLSTER AT HIS WAIST. THE P SAID, "IF WE ARRT YOU AND YOU GO TO JAIL, YOU ULD GET KILLED. IT ISN'T MON FOR THERE TO BE GAY MALAYSIANS PRISONS. THEY ULD BE SEXUALLY ASSLTED AND SOMETIM BEATEN TO ATH."THE YOUNG MAN REPEATED THAT HE WAS NOT GAY. THE PS ASKED FOR HIS ID. THEY TOOK DOWN HIS NAME AND FULL ADDRS. HE WAS LIVG WH HIS FAY AT THE TIME. THE POLICEMEN TOLD HIM THEY NOW HAD HIS TAILS, AND IF HE WAS "UGHT" AGA, HE KNEW WHAT THE NSEQUENC WOULD BE."THE POLICEMAN WHO TOOK ME BY LLAR PHED ME TO THE GROUND AND SPAT ON ME," THE MAN RELLED.THE THEN-TEENAGER WENT HOME. "I REALIZED THEN WASN'T SAFE TO REMA MALAYSIA." IN RELLG MALAYSIA'S MANY LGBT-RELATED FLASHPOTS, THE MAN RELLED THE LONG, PLEX SAGA AROUND FORMER PUTY PRIME MISTER ANWAR IBRAHIM, WHO WAS JAILED TWICE FOR SODOMY (AND WHO HAS NIED THE ALLEGATN). ROSLAND RAHMAN/GETTY "MALAYSIA IS AN ISLAMIC UNTRY, WHERE THE MAJORY POPULATN IS MLIM," SAID THE MAN. "EVEN IF YOU'RE NOT MLIM YOU HAVE TO OBEY THE VERY SAME LAWS. I HAD TO BE UT THAT ENVIRONMENT AND NOT GET TROUBLE WH POLICE." “THE BULLYG CLUD NAME-LLG AND TENSIFIED WHEN SOME OF MY CLASSMAT JOED GANGS THE CY WHICH ARE VERY HOMOPHOBIC AND TARGET YOUNG KIDS THEY THK ARE HOMOSEXUAL.” THAT IS WHY THE CINT AFTER THE BEATG HE TOOK WAS SO IGHTENG. "I KNEW I WAS GAY, I ULDN'T BE OPEN ABOUT . I WENT TO AN ALL-BOYS' HIGH SCHOOL. I KNEW THAT MAYBE THE WAY I BEHAVED SHOWED THAT WAS TE. THE OTHER KIDS THERE TARGETED ME. THE BULLYG CLUD NAME-LLG AND TENSIFIED WHEN SOME OF MY CLASSMAT JOED GANGS THE CY WHICH ARE VERY HOMOPHOBIC AND TARGET YOUNG KIDS THEY THK ARE HOMOSEXUAL."AS WELL AS THE CREASE ANTI-LGBT RHETORIC BY THE THORI MALAYSIA, THE MAN SPOKE ABOUT THE MISTRY OF HEALTH'S VATN TO MALAYSIANS TO PARTICIPATE A NATNAL VIO NTT 2017, ONE SPECIFIC TOPIC BEG "THE BT WAYS TO PREVENT HOMOSEXUALY." THERE ARE PUBLIC WORKSHOPS ON HOW TO DO THE SAME, HE SAID. EARLIER THIS YEAR, MALAYSIAN THORI BANNED OUT-LBIAN HONG KONG POP STAR DENISE HO OM PERFORMG THE UNTRY. IN AN EXTRAORDARY MOVE, FOREIGNERS WHO ARE LGBT, OR WHO N BE INTIFIED AS SUCH, HAVE ALSO BEEN FORBIDN OM ENTERG MALAYSIA. "THEY'RE NOT ONLY ATTACKG LOL CIZENS, NOW THEY WANT TO ARRT PEOPLE OM ALL OVER WORLD," SAID THE MAN. "THGS ARE ACTUALLY GETTG WORSE. I DON'T THK THGS ARE LIKELY TO IMPROVE MY LIFETIME UNFORTUNATELY."THE MAN SAID HE WAS BROUGHT UP A LOWER-MIDDLE-CLASS HOME; HIS FATHER WAS A BSMAN, HIS MOTHER A HOTEL BOOKG AGENT TURNED FULL-TIME HOEWIFE. HE WAS A MIDDLE CHILD WH OLR BROTHER AND YOUNGER SISTER. HIS FAY WAS NOT SUPPORTIVE OF HIM, ED QUE THE OPPOSE. AS A YOUNG BOY, THE MAN DIDN'T THK ABOUT HOW TO NFORM TO SOCIAL EXPECTATNS, AND WOULD RECEIVE ABE, "JT FOR ACTG MORE FEME." "WHEN I WAS YOUNGER THE ABE WAS MORE OM MY PARENTS," HE SAID. "MY DAD LIKED TO E A BELT AND THE GARN HOSE, MY MOM ED A REALLY LONG NE."WHY WERE THEY BEATG YOU, I ASKED."TO RRECT MY BEHAVR," SAID THE MAN.THE BEATGS HAD BEGUN, AGED 6, WH A HARD SLAP THE FACE OM HIS MOTHER. SHE HAD UGHT HIM DRSG UP HER CLOTH ("IT WAS JT DRSG UP, I WAS A LTLE KID"). HOW REALIZED HE WAS GAY EARLY, AROUND THE SAME AGE, OM WATCHG TV AND READG MAGAZ AND BOOKS. "I HAD A LOT OF CURSY AS A CHILD. WHEN MY BROTHER AND I WATCHED RTOONS HIS HERO WERE THE LEAD GUY. I ALWAYS LIKED THE FEMALE CHARACTERS." “MY FATHER TOLD ME, ‘I WILL NOT HAVE A “PONDAN” THE FAY. I WOULD RATHER NOT HAVE A SON THAN HAVE A “PONDAN” THE FAY.’ THEY MA VERY CLEAR WHERE THEY STOOD.” JT LIKE THE BULLI WHO BEAT HIM, THE MAN'S FATHER ALSO ED THE WORD "PONDAN," MEANG FAGGOT, ABOUT HIS OWN CHILD. "HE TOLD ME, 'I WILL NOT HAVE A 'PONDAN' THE FAY. I WOULD RATHER NOT HAVE A SON THAN HAVE A 'PONDAN' THE FAY,' DAD SAID. THEY MA VERY CLEAR WHERE THEY STOOD.""THEY WOULD SAY, 'START ACTG LIKE OTHER BOYS. WHY ARE YOU DOG THIS TO ? YOUR TEACHERS LLED AND SAID YOU MIGHT BE SENT TO THIS MP.'"HIS SCHOOL TEACHERS HAD NOTICED THE BULLYG THE MAN RECEIVED AT SCHOOL, AND—LIKE THE POLICE OFFICERS WHO WATCHED HIM GET BEATEN UP, THEN ADD TO HIS MISERY BY LLG HIS PARENTS, AND SUGGTG THAT THE EXTREMELY YOUNG KID, THEN AGED 7 TO 9, WOULD BENEF OM GOG TO A SEXUALY "NVERSN MP TO 'RRECT' MY BEHAVR."HIS PARENTS DIDN'T DO THIS; THEY SENT HIM TO ANOTHER SCHOOL. IT WASN'T BEE THEY OBJECTED TO THE IA OF THE MP. "IF YOU SEND YOUR SON TO A MP LIKE THAT BRGS ENORMO SHAME ONTO THE FAY," THE MAN SAID. "THERE WAS A LOT OF EMPHASIS BASED ON THE HONOR OF THE FAY, NOT THE DIVIDUAL. IF I WENT TO THE GAY NVERSN MP, WORD WOULD SPREAD PRETTY QUICKLY, PEOPLE WOULD KNOW, AND I WOULD BE AT RISK OF GETTG THROWN OUT OF THE HOE AND DISOWNED. I KNEW THE RISK, AND I KNEW I HAD TO START NFORMG JT TO SURVIVE."EVENTUALLY, HE HAD TO TRANSFER SCHOOLS TWICE. HIS PARENTS WOULD TELL HIM TO BEHAVE "NORMALLY, LIKE THE OTHER KIDS" AT THE NEW SCHOOL. HE WOULD TRY, BUT AFTER THE BEATG BY THE FOUR OTHER BOYS AND THE POLICE THREATS, "I KNEW I ULDN'T GO TO MY PARENTS AND SAY, 'I'VE EXPERIENCED ALL THIS. PLEASE HELP ME.' THEY THOUGHT THE BLAME WAS ALWAYS ON ME. 'WHY N'T HE JT MAN UP?'"THE MAN NEVER ME OUT TO HIS PARENTS, NEVER HAD A NVERSATN ABOUT ANY OF . "I WOULDN'T SAY ANYTHG. ANYTHG I WOULD SAY WOULD JT PROVOKE THEM. I WOULD JT SILENTLY ENDURE, AND SAY THAT I WOULDN'T DO AGA, EVEN THOUGH I HADN'T DONE ANYTHG ANYWAY."THE BULLYG AND BEATGS AT SCHOOL GOT WORSE AS THE MAN GOT OLR. WHEN HE WAS A TEENAGER, THE MALAYSIAN ERNMENT ENDORSED AN ANTI-LGBT MIL, ABNORMAL DIRE, WHICH SCHOOL PUPILS WERE TAKEN TO SEE. "ALL THE LGBTQ CHARACTERS WERE KILLED BY LIGHTNG AT THE END," THE MAN RELLED. HIS IENDS AT SCHOOL FOUND FUNNY, HE THOUGHT WAS HORRIBLE. "THAT'S HOW SYSTEMIC HOMOPHOBIA IS MALAYSIA," HE SAID. "IT'S NOT ONE-OFF, 'S THE WHOLE ERNMENT, THE WHOLE TN SYSTEM, THE WHOLE SOCIETY."THERE ARE NO POSIVE ROLE MOLS FOR LGBT YOUTH, NO OPTNS. EVEN STRAIGHT ALLI ARE PUT OFF OM VOICG SUPPORT BEE OF THE OPPROBRIUM THAT IS HEAPED UPON THEM SHOULD THEY DO SO, SAID THE MAN. THE MAN HAD CSH AT SCHOOL. HE SPENT A LOT OF TIME WH ANOTHER BOY WHO WAS TWO YEARS OLR THAN HIM. "THE RELATNSHIP WAS MOSTLY PLATONIC, BUT WAS CLEAR WE BOTH LIKED EACH OTHER. WE SPENT A LOT OF TIME TOGETHER. BUT AFTER I GOT BEATEN, THE VERY NEXT DAY I SAW HIM, HE HAD BIS ON HIS FACE. I TRIED TO TALK TO HIM, BUT HE WAS WH HIS IENDS. HE LLED ME A FAGGOT, AND TOLD ME TO STAY AWAY. I NNECTED THE DOTS. HE HAD BEEN ATTACKED AS WELL, AND WAS TRYG TO F . IT WAS THE LAST TIME I EVER TALKED TO HIM."THE FOLLOWG YEAR, HE HAD A IEND, ANOTHER CLASSMATE, WHO PUT LS EFFORT THAN THE MAN TO FTG . "HE WAS FLAMBOYANT. HE GOT ATTACKED. HIS PARENTS TRANSFERRED HIM TO ANOTHER SCHOOL, AND BEFORE THAT TRANSFER HE WAS SENT TO A NVERSN MP. AROUND THE SAME TIME, I HAD STARTED TRYG TO NFORM. “I HEARD HE HAD MTED SUICI. I WAS VASTATED, AND I RELATED TO HIM BEE AT THAT TIME I WAS THKG OF DOG THE SAME THG. I THOUGHT, ‘THAT ULD HAVE BEEN ME.’ THE ONLY DIFFERENCE WAS, HE CHOSE NOT TO SPENT AS MUCH ENERGY AS I HAD, TRYG TO ‘HI.’” "THIS BOY RETURNED TO SCHOOL. I TRIED TO TALK TO HIM, BUT HE WAS QUIET AND WHDRAWN. THEN HE MOVED TO THE NEW SCHOOL. THEN I HEARD HE HAD MTED SUICI. I WAS VASTATED, AND I RELATED TO HIM BEE AT THAT TIME I WAS THKG OF DOG THE SAME THG. I THOUGHT, 'THAT ULD HAVE BEEN ME.' THE ONLY DIFFERENCE WAS, HE CHOSE NOT TO SPENT AS MUCH ENERGY AS I HAD, TRYG TO 'HI.'""I HAD A SEVERE PRSN, AND DIDN'T HAVE SOMEONE TO GO TO FOR HELP," THE MAN SAID OF THE TIME HE NSIRED MTG SUICI HIMSELF. "I FELT VERY ALONE. I DIDN'T SEE A SOLUTN. I ULDN'T GO TO MY PARENTS. I DIDN'T ACTUALLY MAKE AN ACTUAL SUICI ATTEMPT, AND WHEN I THOUGHT ABOUT I WOULD TRY TO DISTRACT MYSELF BY DOG MORE PRODUCTIVE THGS, LIKE WRG. I HAD THGS PUBLISHED, I WON A FEW WRG PETNS."ALL AROUND HIM THE ANTI-GAY MSAGE WAS THE SAME. AS A TEEN, THE MAN HEARD LADY GAGA'S 'BORN THIS WAY,' WHICH BEME AN NER ANTHEM OF HOPE. BUT, HE SAID, HE ULDN'T NTEMPLATE THE POSSIBILY OF EVER BEG OUT. IN 2017, THE UNTRY EVEN PICKED A FIGHT WH DISNEY OVER A GAY-THEMED SCENE BETY AND THE BEAST (LATER BACKG DOWN OVER A THREAT TO CUT THE SCENE). WHEN THE MAN WAS 18 2011, HE PARTICIPATED A STREET MONSTRATN, LLG FOR FAIRER AND MORE MOCRATIC ELECTORAL PROCS MALAYSIA. HE WAS ABOUT TO APPLY FOR ENTRY TO LOL LLEG AND UNIVERSI. THE PROTT TURNED VLENT, HE SAID. THE POLICE AND THE ARY PLOYED TEAR GAS AND BEGAN BEATG PROTTERS. HE WNSED THE WHOLE THG, EVEN THOUGH HIS PARENTS HAD NOT WANTED HIM TO PARTICIPATE SE HE GOT ARRTED AND "BLACKLISTED" TERMS OF HIS UNIVERSY AMBNS, FUTURE EMPLOYMENT, HEALTHRE, AND HOG. THE ERNMENT ULD ALSO STOP YOU OM TRAVELG OUT OF THE UNTRY, HE NOTED.HE MANAGED TO GET HOME WHOUT GETTG ARRTED, AND WROTE AN SAY ABOUT THE MONSTRATN AND ELECTORAL PROCS. IT WAS PUBLISHED, WON A PRIZE, HIS NAME WAS REVEALED. ALL HIS APPLITNS FOR LOL LLEG WERE SUBSEQUENTLY REJECTED; SOME PHONE LLS, THOSE LLEG EXPLAED THE MAN'S NAME WAS ED ON A BLACKLIST. HE HAD WANTED TO STUDY LAW. "I THOUGHT WAS THE ONLY WAY THAT I ULD BE, THE FUTURE, SOME KD OF POSN TO CHANGE THGS MALAYSIA THE LONG TERM," HE SAID.HE HAD HOPED TO GET A SCHOLARSHIP. "I WAS OBVLY VASTATED. I HAD DONE WELL HIGH SCHOOL AND ULD NOT GO TO LLEGE."DETERMED TO FULFILL HIS POTENTIAL AND FD A MEANS OF PE, THE MAN APPLIED FOR LLEG THE U.K. AND U.S. WHICH OFFERED MER-BASED SCHOLARSHIPS. "I KNEW THEY WERE MY ONLY TICKET OUT OF THIS ENVIRONMENT," HE SAID. AT THE SAME TIME, HE OBSERVED THE WORSENG STATE OF LGBT RIGHTS MALAYSIA. "EXTREMIST RELIG GROUPS HAD GAED MUCH MORE PROMENCE, AND NSERVATIV WERE BEG MORE VOL THEIR VIEWS ON LGBTQ." “FOR ME, MY SAFETY AND SURVIVAL WERE A TOP PRRY RATHER THAN G OUT AND PUTTG MYSELF SUATN WHERE I WAS A TARGET, PROSECUTED, AND MY FUTURE STROYED.” THE MAN RECEIVED A SCHOLARSHIP TO STUDY THE U.S. AT THE TIME, THE YOUNG MAN WAS STILL CLOSETED. "FOR ME, MY SAFETY AND SURVIVAL WERE A TOP PRRY RATHER THAN G OUT AND PUTTG MYSELF A SUATN WHERE I WAS A TARGET, PROSECUTED, AND MY FUTURE STROYED."IN 2013, AGED 19, HE LEFT MALAYSIA TO STUDY ENOMICS AT AN AMERIN UNIVERSY. IT WAS HIS MUCH-WISHED-FOR NEW LIFE, THOUGH HE WAS STILL HEAVILY TRMATIZED."IT WAS A GREAT FOUR YEARS, BUT I SPENT A FAIR AMOUNT OF TIME WH THE LLEGE THERAPIST," SAID THE MAN. "I HAD A LOT OF ISSU TO UNRSTAND. I BLAMED MYSELF FOR WHO I WAS. I ASKED, 'WHY N'T I BE NORMAL?' I WASN'T ACCEPTG OF MYSELF. I DIDN'T KNOW I ULD BE.' I ED TO HAVE A LOT OF NIGHTMAR ABOUT WHAT HAD HAPPENED.'" “THE LONGER I AM AWAY, THE EASIER IS TO BE WHO I TLY AM SI. WHOUT ALL THE MENTAL AND PHYSIL HARASSMENT, I REALIZE ’S OK. I N JT BE WHO I AM.” IN HIS JUNR YEAR 2016, THE MAN ME TO NEW YORK CY TO DO AN TERNSHIP, AND MET, THROUGH APPS, THE FIRST OUT GAY MEN HE HAD EVER KNOWN. HE HAD HIS FIRST KISS: "IT DIDN'T FEEL FORCED OR UNNATURAL." (HE IS CURRENTLY SGLE, AND GOG ON DAT.) "I MET SO MANY GREAT, TERTG GAY MEN. I WENT TO THE STONEWALL INN, WHICH WAS SO HUGE FOR ME. I DIDN'T KNOW I WOULD EVER REACH THAT POT OF GOG TO THAT PLACE AND BEG PROUD OF WHO I AM. BUT I DID ."THE BREAKTHROUGH, SAID THE MAN, WAS BEG AWAY OM MALAYSIA, "AND THE LONGER I AM AWAY, THE EASIER IS TO BE WHO I TLY AM SI. WHOUT ALL THE MENTAL AND PHYSIL HARASSMENT, I REALIZE 'S OK. I N JT BE WHO I AM."IN 2016 HE ATTEND HIS FIRST PRI MARCH FOR THE FIRST TIME NEW YORK. "HILLARY CLTON WAS THERE THAT YEAR. THERE WERE SO MANY PEOPLE HAPPY WH WHO THEY WERE. I FELT THE SAME. I ULD FALLY BE WHO I WAS. IT FELY HELPED MY OWN ACCEPTANCE." THE MAN BEGAN THE PROCS OF APPLYG FOR ASYLUM LAST NOVEMBER. HE HAS A WORK PERM. HE'S AMASSG SUPPORTG LETTERS FOR HIS APPLITN, AND IS AWAG A DATE FOR HIS ASYLUM TERVIEW.HE MISS HIS IENDS AND THE FOOD OF MALAYSIA. BUT HE DON'T MISS HOW OPPRSIVE THE ENVIRONMENT WAS. "I DON'T MISS THE THGS I WENT THROUGH, THE ERNMENT, THE MEDIA. THAT'S WHY I MA THE CISN TO BEE A LTLE MORE PUBLIC ON WHERE I STAND. MANY ASYLUM SEEKERS E TO THIS UNTRY, WHOUT ACCS TO ANY EFUL ROURC."THE MAN'S VIRAL POLEMIC ATTRACTED HUNDREDS OF MENTS. A PROFSOR AT AN ISLAMIC UNIVERSY MALAYSIA REPOSTED , AND SAID THE MAN WAS WRONG, WHICH LED TO THE PROFSOR'S FOLLOWERS POSTG HATEFUL MENTS, CLUDG ENURAGG THE MAN TO KILL HIMSELF. "THEY'VE ALSO TOLD ME NOT TO RETURN TO MALAYSIA, THAT 'THIS UNTRY DON'T NEED SOMEONE LIKE YOU.'"THE MAN DID NOT RPOND TO HIS CRICS. HE ALSO HEARD OM LGBT MALAYSIANS, GRATEFUL TO HEAR AN ALL-TOO-RARE VOICE OF SUPPORT—SUCH AS OM A TRANSGENR MAN GETTG THROWN OUT OF HIS HOME BY UNACCEPTG PARENTS. HE ASKED THE MAN WHAT SHOULD HE DO; THE MAN PASSED ON WHAT EFUL NTACTS HE HAD, WHICH WERE NOT MANY. THE ONLY EFUL NONPROF, HE SAID, WAS THE AIDS-BASED PT FOUNDATN. THERE ARE NO LGBT-SPECIFIC ANIZATNS.THE MAN ALSO HEARD OM A GAY MAN WHO HAD HAD SEX WH ANOTHER MAN WHO WAS NOW BLACKMAILG HIM, "SAYG IF HE DON'T GIVE HIM ALL HIS MONEY HE'LL REPORT HIM TO THE POLICE, WHICH ULD LEAD TO THIS MAN GOG TO JAIL. THERE ARE LGBT PEOPLE MALAYSIA EXPERIENCG SUCH PERSECUTN AND HARASSMENT."THE MAN IS NOT OUT TO HIS PARENTS, EVEN IF THE EDORIAL THAT WAS PUBLISHED EFFECTIVELY OUTED HIM. HE SAID THEY ARE NOT TECH-SAVVY AND HAD NOT SEEN . HIS BROTHER, HOWEVER, HAS BEEN LEFT "VERY NCERNED. EVEN THOUGH HE DON'T NECSARILY SUPPORT OR AGREE WH ME, HE KNEW THAT WE NNOT LET OUR PARENTS KNOW BEE THE NSEQUENCE WOULD THAT I WOULD GET DISOWNED. HE'S TRYG HIS BT TO KEEP THGS QUIET."HOWEVER, A FEW MONTHS AGO, JT AFTER THE ARTICLE WAS PUBLISHED, TWO POLICE OFFICERS ME TO THE FAY HOME. THE MAN'S BROTHER WAS THERE ALONE. THEY ASKED WHERE THE MAN WAS. HIS BROTHER TOLD THEM HE WAS NOT LIVG THERE. THEY TOLD HIM TO LET THEM KNOW IF THE MAN EVER RETURNED TO MALAYSIA."THAT'S WHEN I REALIZED I'D PUT MYSELF DANGER BY WRG A SIMPLE ARTICLE. I DIDN'T THK WAS THAT BIG A AL. I WASN'T NAMG PUBLIC OFFICIALS. I FELT BAD ABOUT MY BROTHER BEG ROPED TO A SUATN HE SHOULDN'T HAVE BEEN THE FIRST PLACE. HE'S ABOUT TO START HIS OWN FAY." THE MAN THOUGHT ABOUT WRG A SEND EDORIAL, BUT HASN'T—YET AT LEAST—BEE OF HOW WOULD AFFECT HIS FAY."I TOLD MY BROTHER THERE'S NOTHG THEY N DO, BEE I AM HERE," SAID THE MAN. HE FELT HIS FAY HAD NOTHG TO FEAR BEE THEY HAVE MTED NO CRIME. "I'M THE ONE WHO HAS MTED 'A CRIME,'" SAID THE MAN, RAISG HIS FGERS AS QUOTATN MARKS AROUND THE LAST TWO WORDS. “THE DANGERS HAVE BEE EVEN MORE REAL. THAT JT SPIR ME TO DO MORE WORK WH ASYLUM CONNECT BEE WHAT WE DO CREAT SO MUCH IMPACT. I KNOW THAT THERE ARE A LOT OF PEOPLE OUT THERE DIFFERENT UNTRI WHO ARE UNFORTUNATELY STILL PERSECUTED, AND I WANT TO DO ALL I N TO PROVI SAFE ROURC FOR THEM.” THE POSSIBILY THAT HIS APPLITN FOR ASYLUM WOULD BE NIED IS "IGHTENG. IT'S DIFFERENT IF THE ERNMENT DON'T KNOW WHO YOU ARE, AND YOU N JT GO BACK ANONYMOLY. BUT 'S NOT A GREAT LIFE THE CLOSET. AND NOW I'VE OUTED MYSELF WH MY ROLE AT ASYLUM CONNECT. THE DANGERS HAVE BEE EVEN MORE REAL. THAT JT SPIR ME TO DO MORE WORK WH ASYLUM CONNECT BEE WHAT WE DO CREAT SO MUCH IMPACT. I KNOW THAT THERE ARE A LOT OF PEOPLE OUT THERE DIFFERENT UNTRI WHO ARE UNFORTUNATELY STILL PERSECUTED, AND I WANT TO DO ALL I N TO PROVI SAFE ROURC FOR THEM."HIS SE OF PERSECUTN IS WELL-DOCUMENTED, HE SAID. THE THORI HERE N SEE THE DANGERS HE FAC MALAYSIA, AS WELL AS WHAT THE GENERAL LGBTQ POPUL FAC THERE.THE TMP ADMISTRATN'S RHETORIC AND PRACTICE AROUND ASYLUM SEEKERS AND MIGRANTS—AND TOWARDS LGBT PEOPLE—HAS BEEN "STRSFUL" FOR THE MAN TO OBSERVE AS HE HAS MA HIS APPLITN FOR ASYLUM. BUT HE IS STILL TERMED TO FIGHT FOR LGBT ASYLUM SEEKERS, EVEN WHILE HE IS ONE HIMSELF."I HAVE A PERSONAL NNECTN TO . I UNRSTAND THEIR PA AND WHERE THEY'RE G OM BEE I WAS ASYLUM CONNECT'S TARGET DIENCE MYSELF. I ED THEIR TALOG OF ROURC WHEN I ARRIVED HERE. NOW I LIVE A UNTRY WHERE I N BE SAFE. I'M SPEAKG OM A PLACE OF PRIVILEGE JT BY LIVG HERE NOW."THE MAN IS SPIRED BY NEW YORK CY PRI MARCH DIRECTOR JULIAN SANJIVAN, ALSO OM MALAYSIA, WHO SUCCSFULLY APPLIED FOR ASYLUM HERE. "THE FACT HE IS SO VISIBLE IS GREAT, AND THAT HE HAS NO DOUBTS ABOUT BEG SO VISIBLE. HE SHOWS HOW IMPORTANT IS TO SPEAK OUT, TO BE A VOICE FOR PEOPLE WHO DON'T HAVE THAT VOICE."THE MAN HAS VOLUNTEERED FOR ASYLUM CONNECT FOR ALMOST A YEAR AND A HALF. AS WELL AS SEEKG DONATNS FOR THEIR WORK, THE GROUP ALSO IS ALSO LOOKG FOR STAFF AND VOLUNTEERS. THEIR CLIENTS, SAID THE MAN, ARE SEEKG TO PE LGBT PERSECUTN MIDDLE EASTERN UNTRI LIKE IRAN AND IRAQ, OM AIN UNTRI LIKE UGANDA AND ETHPIA, OM RSIA, AND OM ASIAN UNTRI LIKE INDONIA, PAKISTAN, AND MALAYSIA.THE SPECIAL ISSU LGBT ASYLUM SEEKERS FACE ARE CENTERED AROUND THE PERSECUTN THEY HAVE FACED BEE OF THEIR SEXUALY OR GENR INTY. ASYLUM CONNECT HELPS NNECT THEM WH THE BT LEGAL AND OTHER REPRENTATN. AS WH THE MAN HIMSELF, MANY LGBT ASYLUM SEEKERS ARE HEAVILY TRMATIZED BEE OF EXPERIENC THEIR HOME UNTRI. THE BAR IS "GETTG HIGHER" THE U.S., SAID THE MAN; MANY ASYLUM SEEKERS TRY TO ENTER MORE ACCEPTG, PRO-LGBT UNTRI LIKE CANADA AND THOSE WH EUROPE. THE MAN REMAS QUIETLY OPTIMISTIC. HE GRADUATED OM UNIVERSY LAST MAY, MOVED TO SAN FRANCIS, AND GOT A JOB WORKG MERCIAL REAL TATE. HE HAS VOLUNTEERED FOR SAN FRANCIS PRI, "AND FOUND A MUNY THAT IS VERY ACCEPTG, THAT IS NOT JT TOLERATED BUT CELEBRATED. EVERY JUNE THE WHOLE CY CELEBRAT PRI. THIS YEAR I MARCHED PRI, WHICH I WOULD NEVER HAVE IMAGED DOG A UPLE OF YEARS AGO—MARCHG ONE OF THE LARGT PRI PARAS THE WORLD. "I'M THRILLED TO MEET PEOPLE WHO ARE VERY PASSNATE ABOUT SOCIAL ISSU. AT THE SAME TIME THEY UNRSTAND BEG GAY SAN FRANCIS IS A PRIVILEGE. WE GET TO ENJOY CERTA THGS MANY PEOPLE DON'T OTHER PARTS OF THE UNTRY, AND OTHER PARTS OF THE WORLD, DO NOT. I'M VERY AWARE OF THAT." “WHEN THGS BEE VERY DIFFICULT, YOU TRY TO FD WAYS TO BE ROURCEFUL AND SURVIVE THAT ENVIRONMENT. THAT QUALY IS WHAT MAK THE LGBT MUNY SO WONRFUL. IT’S WHY WE NTUE TO TRY AND MAKE PROGRS.” THE MAN ADD QUIETLY, "THE LIFE I'M LIVG NOW IS SO DIFFERENT OM THE LIFE I HAD THE PAST. WHEN I LOOK BACK I REALIZE I HAD SOMETHG SIAR MON WH LGBTQ PEOPLE WHO EXPERIENCE PERSECUTN: A SENSE OF RILIENCE. WHEN THGS BEE VERY DIFFICULT, YOU TRY TO FD WAYS TO BE ROURCEFUL AND SURVIVE THAT ENVIRONMENT. THAT QUALY IS WHAT MAK THE LGBT MUNY SO WONRFUL. IT'S WHY WE NTUE TO TRY AND MAKE PROGRS."DO HE FEAR FOR HIS LIFE IF SENT BACK TO MALAYSIA? "ABSOLUTELY, PECIALLY WH THE BACKLASH AGAST THE ARTICLE I WROTE," THE MAN SAID. “STAY STRONG AND DO WHATEVER YOU N TO SURVIVE AND NOT PUT YOURSELF DANGER. THAT SHOULD BE YOUR PRRY BEE UNFORTUNATELY TO BE OUT IS IMPOSSIBLE. KNOW THAT THERE ARE PEOPLE LIKE ME WHO ARE SPEAKG OUT.” FROM AFAR, THE MAN HOP TO MPAIGN FOR CHANGE MALAYSIA. THE EDORIAL HE PUBLISHED CERTALY CREATED AN IMPACT. "I WANT TO MAKE SURE THE ERNMENT AND PUBLIC OFFICIALS KNOW THAT WHAT DO TO LGBTQ PEOPLE IS WRONG. I HOPE I N FD A WAY TO HELP UNRAVEL THE LAWS PLACE THAT PERSECUTE THE LGBTQ MUNY, AND THE WAY TO DO THAT OM THIS UNTRY IS TO MAKE SURE THE ERNMENT KNOWS HOW WRONG THE LAWS ARE, AND HOW SHOULD DO BETTER TO GIVE LGBTQ PEOPLE BASIC PROTECTNS."TO ANY LGBT MALAYSIANS READG THIS, THE MAN SAID: "STAY STRONG AND DO WHATEVER YOU N TO SURVIVE AND NOT PUT YOURSELF DANGER. THAT SHOULD BE YOUR PRRY BEE UNFORTUNATELY TO BE OUT IS IMPOSSIBLE. KNOW THAT THERE ARE PEOPLE LIKE ME WHO ARE SPEAKG OUT."IF HIS APPLITN FOR ASYLUM IS GRANTED, THE MAN WOULD LIKE TO GO TO BS OR LAW SCHOOL, AND CREATE A REER OM THAT. HE'D LIKE TO EXPAND HIS VOLUNTEERG WH ASYLUM CONNECT, BOTH NATNALLY AND TERNATNALLY."THIS IS SO PERSONAL TO ME," SAID THE MAN. "I'M WILLG TO RISK GETTG TARGETED. I EXPERIENCED PERSECUTN PECIALLY AT A YOUNG AGE, WHEN I DID NOT HAVE A ROLE MOL OR SOMEONE I ULD TALK TO TO HELP. I REALIZE HOW IMPORTANT ROLE MOLS ARE, AND AN AWARENS THAT THERE IS SOMEONE OUT THERE LIKE ME ABLE TO SPEAK MY MD. "LGBTQ YOUTH MALAYSIA ARE AT RISK OF PRSN AND SUICI. I THK THE WORK I DO ULD BE VERY IMPACTFUL IF I DO MY BT TO MAKE THOSE PEOPLE REALIZE THAT THGS MAY BE BAD, BUT YOU HAVE SO MUCH POWER TO SURVIVE AND THRIVE. BY DOG THIS WORK, I KNOW THE TRMA I WENT THROUGH WAS WORTH SOME WAY."TO THE YOUNGER GAY KID VERSN OF HIMSELF, THE 24-YEAR-OLD ONE WOULD SAY: "DON'T BE SO PRSED. I KNOW THGS ARE HARD, BUT YOU'RE STRONGER THAN YOU THK, EVEN THOUGH YOU DON'T HAVE SOMEONE YOU ULD TURN TO. YOU'LL SUCCEED WHATEVER YOU DO. STAY STRONG." “EVERYTHG IS AT STAKE. MY LIFE, MY LIVELIHOOD, MY JOB, MY ABILY TO BE MYSELF AND BE HAPPY AND NOT BE ATTACKED. IT’S A HUGE PRSURE. IT KEEPS YOU ON YOUR TO. YOU’RE SUCH A VULNERABLE POSN. EVERYTHG N BE TAKEN AWAY A SEND IF YOU DON’T FIGHT FOR .” VERY QUIETLY, THE MAN SAID THAT HE IS VOLVED A "FIGHT FOR MY LIFE. I'M ALWAYS SURVIVAL MO. I N'T MAKE ANY MISTAK. EVERYTHG IS AT STAKE. MY LIFE, MY LIVELIHOOD, MY JOB, MY ABILY TO BE MYSELF AND BE HAPPY AND NOT BE ATTACKED. IT'S A HUGE PRSURE. IT KEEPS YOU ON YOUR TO. YOU'RE SUCH A VULNERABLE POSN. EVERYTHG N BE TAKEN AWAY A SEND IF YOU DON'T FIGHT FOR ."WHICH MAK EVEN MORE IMPRSIVE THAT, AS WELL AS FIGHTG FOR HIMSELF, THE MAN IS DITED TO FIGHTG FOR OTHERS.TO THE MAN SIMPLY FEELS THE RIGHT THG TO DO. "BEG SOMEONE WHO HAS EXPERIENCED PERSECUTN, I KNOW HOW IMPORTANT IS TO FIGHT NOT JT FOR MYSELF BUT FOR OTHER PEOPLE TOO." TIM TEEMAN

Paviln shoppg centre seems to be equented by much of the liberal gay men of the cy, and I heard that the younger set of the men have been seen holdg hands at the mall, though I am sure those are isolated s.

Newspapers have reported how the ctomers are clad only towels and later hled up to book, but they are ually gay massage parlours which are booked to tch illegal immigrants, or premis whout perms. The same Malay guy who might live wh his boyiend KL, hangs out wh mostly gay iends out of work, and outwardly portrays his sexualy (to a certa extent) will keep up appearanc when he “balik kampung” or returns to his hometown. Personally I thk the genuely, humble Malay Mlims ral areas are more open to the so lled guy iends as they do not thk ill of such relatnships as they are not exposed to the gay culture as much as people the towns.

All members of the gay muny should be able to travel where they want and enjoy the treasur Malaysia has to offer, but is important to be aware of the legal and social suatn before travelg.

GAY MALAYSIA

You won’t fd any crazy parti like Bangkok or the openns of islands Thailand, but outright persecutn is rare, and ’s not pletely unheard of to see gay upl out and about; there jt won’t be any public displays of affectn. Bookg at ternatnal, upsle hotels is always a safe bet; is highly unlikely gay travelers will n to any problems here, and there are plenty to choose om, whether Kuala Lumpur or beachsi Penang. While there might be some great nightlife optns, there are none that are publilly for the gay muny, and is val to be sensible and discrete, somethg which is repeated throughout this gui for a good reason.

HOW TO SAY GAY MALAY

In gay-iendly bars hubs like KL and Penang ’s easy enough to get talkg to people, but bee members of the LGBT muny are rarely out and have to disguise themselv, uld often be difficult to know who to approach. Gay men e hook-up apps like Grdr, Scff, and Tdr but onle censorship is creasgly a problem, so a secure VPN before gog is strongly remend orr to protect privacy and rema anonymo.

GAY MALAYSIA: MORN KUALA LUMPUR

A recent edorial he wrote, documentg and nmng the anti-LGBT laws and homophobia of his home untry and published pennt Malaysian media outlets, went viral, brgg praise and nmnatn—and, he believ, leadg the police to his fay’s home Kuala Lumpur to look for him. "Terrified of the ps, their tntg, their power and his vulnerabily, he rpond that he was not gay, that there had been a misunrstandg and that he was tryg to get home after school.

"As well as the crease anti-LGBT rhetoric by the thori Malaysia, the man spoke about the Mistry of Health's vatn to Malaysians to participate a natnal vio ntt 2017, one specific topic beg "the bt ways to prevent homosexualy. There are no LGBT-specific man also heard om a gay man who had had sex wh another man who was now blackmailg him, "sayg if he don't give him all his money he'll report him to the police, which uld lead to this man gog to jail.