As a parent, you probably want what's bt for your child no matter what. But if your child out as gay, lbian, or bisexual, might e as a shock—many parents feel unprepared, upset, or even a ltle nfed. By learng a...
Contents:
- IS YOUR CHILD GAY?
- EXPLAG IT TO YOUR KIDS: WHAT DO 'BEG GAY' MEAN?
- AM I GAY?
- PARENT SPECTS THAT CHILD MIGHT BE GAY
- WHAT TO DO WHEN YOUR CHILD SAYS: "I'M GAY"
- WHEN DO GAY KIDS START “ACTG GAY”?
- AT WHAT AGE DO KIDS INTIFY AS GAY?
- 5 POWERFUL THGS YOU CAN DO IF YOUR CHILD TELLS YOU, "I'M GAY."
- EARLY SIGNS TO TELL YOUR CHILD IS GAY
- HOW TO ACCEPT THAT YOUR CHILD IS GAY, LBIAN OR BISEXUAL
IS YOUR CHILD GAY?
Are you qutng your sexualy? Fd out if you’re gay, straight, bisexual, or asexual. Learn what the terms mean and if they apply to you. * how do you know if your kid is gay *
They immediately clocked as gay, while we immediately clocked them as we warmed up to another, one mom anxly said: "I have a qutn: I am pretty sure my son is gay, but I don't know what to do. "For example, if someone the word "gay" place of "stupid, " remd them that the two are not terchangeable, and suggt they should say what they actually mean stead.
"The rourc n help:PFLAG: The untry’s largt anizatn ung parents, fai, and alli wh people who are lbian, gay, bisexual, transgenr, and Spectm: Offers groups, trag, and rourc promotg genr sensivy and cln for all youthGLBT Natnal Rource Database: LGBTQ+ digal directory of rourcNatnal Queer and Trans Therapists of Color Network: Directory of therapists/unselors who are people of lorNatnal LGBTQ Task Force: The progrsive advocy arm of the LGBTQ+ movementDurg LGBTQ Pri Month, TODAY is sharg the muny’s history, pa, joy and what’s next for the movement.
EXPLAG IT TO YOUR KIDS: WHAT DO 'BEG GAY' MEAN?
A Mnota school district is facg a Department of Jtice vtigatn and a private lawsu over s alleged failure to bat antigay bullyg.... * how do you know if your kid is gay *
Both lbians and gay men often have a history of cross-sex-typed behavrs: ltle boys beg fatuated wh their mother's makp k; ltle girls enamored of field hockey or profsnal wrtlg. Prehomosexual boys tend to be more attracted to solary sports such as swimmg, cyclg and tennis than they are to rougher ntact sports such as football and soccer.
Children who show pronounced sex-atypil behavrs may have more of a geic loadg to their homosexualy. The behavral patterns are feared, loathed and often spoken of directly as harbgers of adult homosexualy.
It is only relatively recently, however, that velopmental scientists have nducted ntrolled studi to intify the earlit and most reliable signs of adult homosexualy.
AM I GAY?
One of the ma issu wh trackg when kids intify as gay is that most people assume that all kids start out straight. * how do you know if your kid is gay *
In lookg refully at the childhoods of gay adults, rearchers are fdg an trigug set of behavral ditors that homosexuals seem to have mon. Curly enough, the age-old homophobic fears of many parents reflect some genue predictive currency. Zucker, both psychologists, published a semal paper on childhood markers of homosexualy 1995.
PARENT SPECTS THAT CHILD MIGHT BE GAY
Fdg out your child is gay n lead to a flood of emotns. Yet, the first five mut of your rponse are cril to your child. Learn what to do. * how do you know if your kid is gay *
So on the basis of some earlier, shakier rearch, along wh a good dose of mon sense, Bailey and Zucker hypothized that homosexuals would show an verted pattern of sex-typed childhood behavrs—ltle boys preferrg girls as playmat and beg fatuated wh their mother's makp k; ltle girls strangely enamored of field hockey or profsnal wrtlg—that sort of thg. Given that a small proportn of the populatn is homosexual, prospective studi require a large number of children.
WHAT TO DO WHEN YOUR CHILD SAYS: "I'M GAY"
Gay youth often face their set of challeng after g out about their genr preferenc. * how do you know if your kid is gay *
Although only 12 percent of the women grew up to be genr dysphoric (the unfortable sense that your blogil sex do not match your genr), the odds of the women reportg a bisexual or homosexual orientatn were up to 23 tim higher than would occur a general sample of young women. And the same holds for gay men.
Bailey and Zucker, who nducted a retrospective study which adults answered qutns about their past, revealed that 89 percent of randomly sampled gay men relled cross-sex-typed childhood behavrs exceedg the heterosexual median. The thors found that “those targets who, as adults, intified themselv as homosexual were judged to be genr nonnformg as children.
WHEN DO GAY KIDS START “ACTG GAY”?
There is also evince of a “dosage effect”: the more genr-nonnformg characteristics there are childhood, the more likely is that a homosexual or bisexual orientatn will be prent adulthood. Not all ltle boys who like to wear drs grow up to be gay, nor do all ltle girls who spise drs bee lbians.
I took to middle school wrtlg as a rather scrawny 80-pound eighth grar, and so dog, ironilly beme all too nsc of my homosexual orientatn. Cross-cultural data show that prehomosexual boys are more attracted to solary sports such as swimmg, cyclg and tennis than they are to rougher ntact sports such as football and soccer; they are also ls likely to be childhood bulli.
AT WHAT AGE DO KIDS INTIFY AS GAY?
Rearchers readily nce that there are que likely multiple—and no doubt extremely plited—velopmental rout to adult homosexualy.
5 POWERFUL THGS YOU CAN DO IF YOUR CHILD TELLS YOU, "I'M GAY."
Bee the data often reveal very early emergg tras prehomosexuals, children who show pronounced sex-atypil behavrs may have more of a geic loadg to their homosexualy, whereas gay adults who were sex-typil as children might trace their homosexualy more directly to particular childhood experienc. Why do parents worry so much about whether their child may or may not be gay?
EARLY SIGNS TO TELL YOUR CHILD IS GAY
All else beg equal, I spect we would be hard-prsed to fd parents who would actually prefer their offsprg to be homosexual.
Evolutnarily, parental homophobia is a no-braer: gay sons and lbian dghters are not likely to reproduce (unls they get creative). Lang, Elton John and Rachel Maddow's close relativ, but I n only image that the straight k are far better off terms of their own reproductive opportuni than they would be whout a homosexual danglg so magnificently on their fay tre.
HOW TO ACCEPT THAT YOUR CHILD IS GAY, LBIAN OR BISEXUAL
So cultivate your ltle prehomosexual's native talents, and your ultimate geic payoff uld, strangely enough, be even larger wh one very special gay child than would be if 10 medcre straight offsprg leaped om your los.
I n say as a once prehomosexual pipsqueak that some preparatn on the part of others would have ma easier on me, rather than nstantly fearg rejectn or worryg about some rels slipup leadg to my “exposure.
And another thg: mt be pretty hard to look to your prehomosexual toddler's limpid ey, bsh away the okie cmbs om her cheek and toss her out on the streets for beg article was origally published wh the tle "Is Your Child Gay?