Why Straight Women Are Attracted to Gay Men | Psychology Today New Zealand

Contents:

• WHY ARE GAY GUYS SO GOOD LOOKG?
• THE REAL REASON GAY MEN DON'T GET FAT
• ALL STEREOTYP ARE TE, EXCEPT ... V: 'ALL EXTREMELY HANDSOME MEN ARE GAY'
• WHY STRAIGHT WOMEN ARE ATTRACTED TO GAY MEN
• WHY ARE SO MANY CREATIVE PEOPLE GAY?
• IS MY HBAND GAY? SIGNS OF A GAY HBAND
• WHY ARE SO MANY GAYS AND LBIANS ATTRACTED TO SAME-SEX PEOPLE WHO LOOK LIKE THE OPPOSE SEX?
• WHY ARE THERE GAY MEN?
• WHY DO GAY MEN AND STRAIGHT WOMEN MAKE SUCH GREAT IENDS?
• MEN WH MCL AND MONEY ARE MORE ATTRACTIVE TO STRAIGHT WOMEN AND GAY MEN—SHOWG GENR ROL AREN'T PROGRSG
• BODY POLICS: JT HOW IMPORTANT ARE LOOKS TO GAY MEN?

WHY ARE GAY GUYS SO GOOD LOOKG?

You see the geo gay guys who uld get any woman alive based on looks alone yet all they want is wang. Are they gay bee they are good lookg or good lookg bee they are gay? Out of the gay guys i know some are pretty, some are average and some are not good lookg at all, so i disagree wh your whole premise.

THE REAL REASON GAY MEN DON'T GET FAT

I've seen some gay people, and I n't say I agree wh this generalisatn, I've seen more ugly gay people than I have good lookg on. Im not gay and im much better lookg than gay dus, all the on nyc always skip leg day and jt do curls which is weird bee they dont even like girls. Gay Guys probably jt have ls strs their liv om not havg to worry about women likg them so they age slower.

I've always received a ton of attentn om gay men whout even seekg out at all. Whenever I see a homosexual du (IE clearly gay) some sort of social gatherg, he nearly always hs on me and pliments me up and down a 100 tim.

I look very mascule, have a ep voice and generally mascule mannerisms so I know they don't thk I am gay (not that gay men n't be mascule but I don't have any gay "tras"). What would e a straight man to be very attractive to gay men but not straight women?

ALL STEREOTYP ARE TE, EXCEPT ... V: 'ALL EXTREMELY HANDSOME MEN ARE GAY'

And, spe what you thk of your own behavr, if the only people exprsg tert are gay guys then you're obvly givg off some signal that cisg is okay. Maybe you do have some sort of vibe gog on whout knowg or gay men fd you attractive and enjoy the ia of beddg a straight guy. New York gay about town and Barneys creative director Simon Doonan jt sold a mancript for a diet book lled Gay Men Don't Get Fat.

While this is te, the real reason why gay men don't get fat might not be the most marketable msage. The book is supposedly, "a stylishly slimmg disurse that prov gay men really ARE French women: prone to disda, favorg cheeky unrwear, nvced of their own artistic brilliance, and (of urse) lorie-obssed.

The advice as to why gay men don't get fat isn't as is only one thg that keeps gay men shape: fear. Y, every gay—at least those of the stereotypil abdomal-obssed physique that populat Fire Island and Palm Sprgs—is brought about bee gay men are aaid that they will be alone for the rt of their liv.

WHY STRAIGHT WOMEN ARE ATTRACTED TO GAY MEN

If a gay man is not "servg body" while petg to fd a trick or boyiend one of the more mcle-bound climat of gay culture, he will be sorely shut out. That is why gay men don't get fat, bee if they don't have pecs, guns, and glut, they're gog home men, unlike their straight unterparts, don't have the luxury to stay "fightg shape" jt long enough to fd a partner before lettg their bodi fall to sh afterwords. I'm gog to let you on a ltle secret: There are untls mted gay upl out there who like to eher play on the si or ve gut stars to their beds.

Y, gay men go to the gym to stay petive, but sce the man-eatg marathon don't end after marriage, they jt keep on petg and petg until ath do they funny thg about the gay petn is that, bee men (pecially of the gay variety) are so visually stimulated, the only piece on the chs board that matters is havg that tradnal lean body. A good body is the only currency this also mak this unique for gay men is one of the other strange quirks of homosexualy. No straight man wants to look like a woman (and certaly not the reverse) but gay men fd what they are physilly attracted to and often remake their bodi the image of their ial mate.

Sce society tells to want mcle-bound athlet, that's what gays want, and that's what they make themselv look like the pursu of their ial. If you want to bed mcl you have to have mcl, if you want to land a twk, you better be a twk (or at least some other type that is easily st any gay porn movie), gay men e all shap and siz (embrace the rabow, people) but still gay culture and inography is largely domated by the same juiced-out body type (and awful tribal tattoos) that you'd fd on Jersey Shore. While there are plenty of average-physiqued homosexuals (who barely mer mentng) there has been a reactn to all this body fascism over the past so many years.

WHY ARE SO MANY CREATIVE PEOPLE GAY?

Y, the "bear" movement, spearhead by gay men who are hairier and chubbier than average, is forever gag steam. While they might be reversg the normal athetic ials of gay culture and Amerin culture at large, they still discrimate jt as much based on physily as their circu party-lovg is tryg to palize on those skny gay men of legend, but what erns them and erns the bear is really the same thg: fear. Many gay men spend their adolcence as outsts or misfs, and when they fally get to a place where they n jo the gay culture at large, they react to their years of social solu by nformg wh the sort of fervor ually rerved for packs of teenage girls.

Most gay men get for ee, and now, wh this book, you too n be a pariah for years, then enter a nformist culture of sual sex and glisteng bodi, followed by a lifetime of hookups wh your signifint other and the waxed dolphs you pick up on Grdr.

IS MY HBAND GAY? SIGNS OF A GAY HBAND

That's the secret of how gay men don't get me, well, I'd much rather be French.

Another mon stereotype about physil appearance is that extremely handsome men are likely to be homosexual. In one experiment, women rate pictur of men as more attractive if they thought that the men were homosexual than if they thought that they were heterosexual, while men do not exhib the same tenncy judgg the attractivens of women. Extremely handsome celebri, such as Tom Cise, have long been dogged wh mors of beg gay all their reers.

From an evolutnary psychologil perspective, do not make sense for extremely handsome men to be gay.

WHY ARE SO MANY GAYS AND LBIANS ATTRACTED TO SAME-SEX PEOPLE WHO LOOK LIKE THE OPPOSE SEX?

) High-qualy gen of extremely handsome men will, therefore, be “wasted” if their rriers are exclively or predomantly homosexual. Consistent wh the evolutnary psychologil logic, turns out that extremely handsome men are not more likely to be gay. Compared to other men, extremely handsome men are often least homosexual, and homosexual men are least physilly attractive.

WHY ARE THERE GAY MEN?

In ntrast, there are some herable physil tras that mak evolutnary sense to be associated wh homosexualy. So short men have relatively ls to lose, reproductively speakg, by beg exclively or predomantly homosexual. While exclive homosexualy n never have any reproductive payoff, relative loss fns terms (what the enomists ll the opportuny sts) is ls if the men are expected to be ls succsful heterosexual reproductn.

) The evolutnary psychologil logic th suggts that taller women have relatively ls to lose, reproductively speakg, by beg exclively or predomantly homosexual.

Once aga, nsistent wh the evolutnary psychologil logic, turns out that shorter men are more likely to be homosexual than taller men, and homosexual men are shorter than heterosexual men. Siarly, taller women are more likely to be homosexual than shorter women, and homosexual women are taller than heterosexual women. Such is the power of the evolutnary psychologil imagatn: It n predict who’s more likely to be gay even the absence of a stereotype.

WHY DO GAY MEN AND STRAIGHT WOMEN MAKE SUCH GREAT IENDS?

We know that at least male homosexualy is strongly geilly fluenced. But a strong geic fluence on sexual orientatn is not nsistent wh the fdgs that those who are ls likely to be reproductively succsful (ugly men, short men, and tall women) are more likely to be homosexual, bee the gen for homosexualy n e to be associated wh gen for physil appearance or for height. More rearch is necsary to explore the potential proximate mechanism by which the gen for male homosexualy have e to be associated wh gen for height and physil attractivens.

MEN WH MCL AND MONEY ARE MORE ATTRACTIVE TO STRAIGHT WOMEN AND GAY MEN—SHOWG GENR ROL AREN'T PROGRSG

For the most part, relatnships between gay men and straight women are healthy and posive, wh one exceptn I'll get to later. In the vast majory of s, relatnships between gay men and straight women are platonic.

Sure, an ocsnal teenage girl falls for a boy who's gay, but don't take most girls very long to figure out that, this se, where there's smoke, there's most fely not fire.

In general, the attractn women feel for gay men tends to be emotnal nature, clearg the way for a highly satisfyg relatnship that outlasts most other relatnships gay men and straight women have. To beg, I'll addrs how and why straight women are emotnally attracted to gay men—an attractn, by the way, that is returned by gay men spas. First, bee most straight women don’t feel sexual toward gay men, the relatnship don’t rry the threat of sexual tensn.

BODY POLICS: JT HOW IMPORTANT ARE LOOKS TO GAY MEN?

Send, straight women love gay men bee closens wh gay men provis a wdow to how the mds of men work, somethg that women want to know as they navigate datg waters wh their straight male peers. Though there are, of urse, differenc between straight and gay men, gay men are neverthels men who share many characteristics and motivatns wh straight men.