"My 'gay' wdow growg up nservative Grand Rapids was solely televisn news, and was bleak," veteran TV reporter Brad Edwards said durg an terview talkg about stgglg to e out.
Contents:
- FORMER WOOD-TV8 REPORTER BRAD EDWARDS: GROWG UP GAY GRAND RAPIDS WAS TOUGH
- TIM MILLER BAR QUEER BODY IN ORIGAL STAGE {FONT-SIZE:20PX;LOR:#999;FONT-STYLE:ALIC;MARG:0PX;MARG-TOP:10PX;}THE "QUEER POT OF LIGHT" OFFERS UP HIS BODY AND SOUL FOR PRENTATN ON {GRID-ROW-START:2;GRID-LUMN-START:2;GRID-LUMN-END:3;}@MEDIA (MAX-WIDTH:950PX){{GRID-LUMN-START:1;GRID-LUMN-END:2;}}{BOX-SIZG:NTENT-BOX;MAX-WIDTH:600PX;PADDG:0PX 20PX;MARG:0PX TO;FONT-FAY:'COLABORATE LIGHT','LUCIDA SANS UNI',SANS-SERIF;MARG-BOTTOM:5PX;} A{LOR:#7B1B18;} IMG{PADDG-RIGHT:7PX;}BY {LOR:#BA0600;}ASHWI {BOX-SIZG:NTENT-BOX;MAX-WIDTH:600PX;PADDG:0PX 20PX;MARG:0PX TO;}{DISPLAY:NONE;}@MEDIA (MAX-WIDTH:950PX){{BOX-SIZG:NTENT-BOX;MAX-WIDTH:600PX;PADDG:0PX 20PX;MARG:0PX TO;DISPLAY:BLOCK;PADDG-TOP:20PX;PADDG-BOTTOM:20PX;MARG-TOP:20PX;BORR-TOP:1PX SOLID #EBEBEB;BORR-BOTTOM:1PX SOLID #EBEBEB;}}{DISPLAY:-WEBK-BOX;DISPLAY:-WEBK-FLEX;DISPLAY:-MS-FLEXBOX;DISPLAY:FLEX;-WEBK-FLEX-DIRECTN:LUMN;-MS-FLEX-DIRECTN:LUMN;FLEX-DIRECTN:LUMN;WIDTH:TO;-WEBK-ALIGN-EMS:CENTER;-WEBK-BOX-ALIGN:CENTER;-MS-FLEX-ALIGN:CENTER;ALIGN-EMS:CENTER;POSN:-WEBK-STICKY;POSN:STICKY;TOP:70PX;-WEBK-FLEX-DIRECTN:ROW;-MS-FLEX-DIRECTN:ROW;FLEX-DIRECTN:ROW;-WEBK-BOX-PACK:CENTER;-WEBK-JTIFY-NTENT:CENTER;-MS-FLEX-PACK:CENTER;JTIFY-NTENT:CENTER;POSN:UNSET;} {DISPLAY:LE-BLOCK;PADDG:0PX;} > SPAN{WIDTH:35PX !IMPORTANT;HEIGHT:35PX !IMPORTANT;TEXT-ALIGN:CENTER;BORR-RADI:50%;} SVG{WIDTH:25PX !IMPORTANT;HEIGHT:35PX !IMPORTANT;} .ADDTHIS_BUTTON_EMAIL > SPAN, .ADDTHIS_BUTTON_PRT > SPAN, .ADDTHIS_BUTTON_LK > SPAN{BACKGROUND-LOR:#EBEBEB !IMPORTANT;} .ADDTHIS_UNTER .ADDTHIS_BUTTON_EXPAND{WIDTH:35PX;HEIGHT:35PX;MARG:0PX;PADDG:0PX;BACKGROUND:NONE;TEXT-ALIGN:CENTER;BORR:1PX SOLID #EBEBEB;BORR-RADI:50%;LOR:#EBEBEB !IMPORTANT;} .ADDTHIS_BUTTON_PACT{DISPLAY:NONE !IMPORTANT;} {MARG:0PX 5PX;}{POSN:RELATIVE;WIDTH:100%;} P{MAX-WIDTH:600PX;MARG:0PX TO;PADDG:0PX 20PX;BOX-SIZG:NTENT-BOX;FONT:17PX/25PX GEIA,SERIF;MARG-TOP:1EM;MARG-BOTTOM:1EM;} OL{MAX-WIDTH:600PX;MARG:0PX TO;PADDG:0PX 20PX;BOX-SIZG:NTENT-BOX;FONT:17PX/25PX GEIA,SERIF;PADDG-LEFT:80PX;} P A, OL A, P A:VISED, OL A:VISED{LOR:#BA0600;-WEBK-TRANSN:0.3S ALL;TRANSN:0.3S ALL;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} P A:HOVER, OL A:HOVER{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} H1, H2, H3, H4, H5, H6{MAX-WIDTH:600PX;MARG:0PX TO;PADDG:0PX 20PX;BOX-SIZG:NTENT-BOX;MARG-TOP:1EM;MARG-BOTTOM:1EM;LOR:#7B1B18;}MY QUEER BODY, PERFORMED BY TIM MILLER ON OCTOBER 4 AND 5APPROPRIATELY CHOSEN MORRISSEY MIC HUMMED THE BACKGROUND, WHILE THE DIENCE, PRIMARILY POSED OF GAY MALE UPL, FILTERED . THERE WAS A CERTA SENSE OF ISOLATN VOLVED BEG THE MIDST OF A GROUP WHERE EVERYONE KNEW EVERYONE ELSE, AND GREETGS BETWEEN THEM FLEW THICK AND FAST.WHILE WAG FOR THE SELF-PROCLAIMED "ACTIVIST [AND] SLUTTY QUEER POT OF LIGHT," TIM MILLER, TO APPEAR ON STAGE, PEOPLE CRACKED LOUD JOK ABOUT THIS BEG "SUCH THE FAY NIGHT," AND THE BEG "THE REAL FAY VALU."MILLER ENTERED OM THE BACK OF THE THEATER WH A LE THAT WAS A FAIR DITN OF WHAT WAS TO E. "I GUS YOU ULD LL THIS A REAR ENTRY," HE CLARED BLANDLY. THOSE FAIAR WH MILLER'S WORK SHOULD KNOW THAT, WH THIS HIGHLY PERSONAL PERFORMANCE, HE HAS TAKEN A STEP A NEW DIRECTN.OF URSE, THERE WAS AN UNABASHED POLIL OVERTONE TO THIS EVENT, SPONSORED BY GLAD (GAY & LBIAN ADVOT & DEFENRS): MILLER EXHORTED HIS DIENCE TO VOTE, AND TO VOTE DEMOCRAT, WH THE PHY OBSERVATN THAT WE "REALLY N'T TAKE FOUR MORE YEARS OF SH." NEVERTHELS, THE OVERALL FOC WAS FIRMLY ON BEG GAY AND BEG TIM MILLER.MILLER WAS DRSED WH NSPICUO RMALY; ALMOST AS A SELF-PARODY, WH HIS BLACK JEANS, BLACK LEATHER JACKET AND, NATURALLY, THE METAPHORIL HEART ON HIS SLEEVE: A PK TRIANGLE, STARK AGAST THE BLACK.WORKG ON THE PREMISE THAT HOMOSEXUALS HAVE A FAR GREATER AWARENS OF THE FLH--HAVG BEEN TGHT SCE CHILDHOOD TO SUPPRS S SIR AND NTROL S LONGGS--HE BEGAN BY "SUMMONG THE BODY," AND TRAIPSED HIS WAY THROUGH THE DIENCE, EXTOLLG THE PRAISE OF ONE MAN'S FOOT, A WOMAN'S FGERS. THEN, TOWARDS THE END OF THE SHOW, HE SUMMONED THE BODY AGA. BUT THIS TIME, THE WERE THE FGERS OF A IEND, TRAMPLED AND BROKEN BY POLICEMEN AT A GAY RIGHTS RALLY, OR THE SMASHED ARM OF SOMEONE VICTIMIZED A "QUEER-BASHG" CINT.BUT SCE THIS WAS SENTIALLY MILLER'S OWN STORY, HE BEGAN AT THE BEGNG--AS A QUEER "SPERMLET" SWIMMG UPSTREAM SEARCH OF AN EGG TO FERTILIZER. THEN, HAVG A SENSE CREATED HIMSELF, HE PASSED THROUGH AN FANCY SURROUND BY "MI DYK AND FAGS" TO PUBERTY, WHEN HE "TRIED TO E NOXZEMA TO JERK OFF," TO AIDS AND THE ELECTN OF RONALD REAGAN. BY THIS TIME, HE WAS SPTG OUT HIS WORDS AN ANGRY SPRAY OF SALIVA THAT DRIFTED OVER THE FIRST FEW ROWS OF THE DIENCE.MILLER'S PERFORMANCE WAS TENSELY PHYSIL: HE SNAPPED HIS SPENRS CSANTLY, OR GRIPPED ENZIEDLY AT HIS MOUTH WHEN SCRIBG HIS FIRST KISS, SPEAKG RAPTLY OF THE MEETG OF TONGU, THE TASTE OF GUMS, THE FEEL OF THE ROOF OF THE MOUTH. AND THEN, UNR THE GLARE OF A RED LIGHT, HE STRIPPED OFF HIS CLOTH, TRYG TO ERASE THE DISGT AND GUILT STILLED HIM AS A CHILD. HOWEVER, THIS ACT WAS SLIGHTLY SPOILED BY OUR HNTG CERTALY THAT HE MIGHT NOT HAVE BEEN SO READY TO BARE HIS CHILDHOOD "SHAME" IF HE HAD NOT HAD SUCH A SLENR, YOUTHFUL, MCULAR BODY TO TAKE PRI .MILLER OFTEN ED FOUR LETTER WORDS, AND OFFENSIVE TERMS SUCH AS "DYKE," "FAG," OR "HALF-MAN," BUT HIS METHOD OF LIVERG THEM, AND HIS ACCEPTANCE OF THEM AS A MATTER OF URSE SOMEHOW RECLAIMED THEM OM HE TALKED ABOUT HIS EXPERIENCE AS "A YOUNG FAG LOVE, SRED SHLS," WAS TOUCHG AND FUNNY, NEVER {DISPLAY:BLOCK;MARG:0PX TO;WIDTH:100%;MAX-WIDTH:100%;BACKGROUND:TRANSPARENT;PADDG:10PX 0PX;} {FONT-FAY:'COLABORATE LIGHT','LUCIDA SANS UNI',SANS-SERIF;LOR:#333333;TEXT-ALIGN:CENTER;FONT-SIZE:0.7EM;TEXT-TRANSFORM:UPPERSE;DISPLAY:BLOCK;} {WIDTH:-WEBK-F-NTENT;WIDTH:-MOZ-F-NTENT;WIDTH:F-NTENT;MARG:0PX TO;TEXT-ALIGN:CENTER;}ADVERTISEMENTHOWEVER, MILLER'S HAB OF BLENDG EDY WH TRAGEDY WAS OFTEN ODDLY UNSETTLG. HE CROONED ABOUT HIS TEENAGE BOYIEND OVER THE SWAY OF IRONILLY WAILG VLS. OR HE WAXED PHILOSOPHIL ABOUT THE FACT THAT "OUR BODI ARE ONLY GOOD FOR ATH"--STOPPG EVERY TEN SENDS TO ADJURE HIS PENIS A HARSH WHISPER TO "GET HARD" AND PROVI HIM WH THE GRAND FAL BE THAT HE NEED.MILLER'S MIMAL E OF PROPS WAS ALSO TERTG. A SILVER CROSS SLUNG AROUND HIS NECK JGLED AGAST THE HIGH SCHOOL RG GIVEN HIM BY HIS BOYIEND "OM ANAHEIM." HE ALSO CRADLED A PIECE OF SOLIDIFIED LAVA TO HIS CHT AS HE TALKED ABOUT THE "EPTN" OF AIDS THAT HAD BURIED SO MANY OF HIS IENDS.BUT PERHAPS THE MOST FASCATG ASPECT OF TIM MILLER'S PERFORMANCE WAS THE EFFORT HE MA TO BREAK DOWN MENTAL BOUNDARI: BETWEEN HIMSELF AND THE DIENCE AS HE PERCHED NAKED ON A YOUNG MAN'S LAP, OR ASKED A WOMAN TO STROKE HIS CHT, RIGHT ABOVE THE HEART. HE BROKE DOWN THE BOUNDARI BETWEEN MALE AND FEMALE, A SURREALISTIC FANTASY SCENE WHERE HE VISUALIZED HIMSELF GIVG BIRTH (VIA THE AN) TO THE BODI OF ALL HIS AD IENDS, AS HE RECREATED THEM BY TALKG ABOUT THEM.AND, ABOVE ALL, MILLER DISSOLVED THE LE DIVIDG TTH OM FALLACY. AT THE END OF HIS PERFORMANCE, THE ANNOUNCED: "I LIED," WHOUT SPECIFYG WHAT HE HAD LIED ABOUT. IT IS NOT IMPORTANT, SURELY, WHETHER THE TAILS OF HIS LIFE WHICH HE MENTNED WERE FACT OR FICTN-- WAS ENOUGH THE TO KNOW THAT THEY ULD HAVE BEEN TE, AND THAT SUCH THGS HAD ALMOST CERTALY HAPPENED TO SOMEONE ELSE.THERE ARE CERTALY TIM WHEN MILLER'S MONOLOGUE IS A LTLE TOO FULL OF SLICK L: WHEN HE ASKS GOD RHETORILLY WHY HE HAS BEEN SPARED ATH OM AIDS WHILE SO MANY OF HIS IENDS HAVE DIED, OR WHEN HE, AS THE SPOKMAN FOR ALL GAY MEN, URG THEM TO "BARE OUR SOULS AND OUR BUTTHOL." BUT HIS VISN OF LIFE AND LOVE IS ENDURG: LOVERS ARE "NAKED THE SIGHT OF EACH OTHER, WHO ARE THE ONLY ON WHO MATTER," OR, MORE BLUNTLY: "WE N'T LET THE RIGHT-WG FUCKHEADS TELL HOW TO FUCK."MILLER, AWARE OF THE AGILY OF LIFE, TOLD THE DIENCE TO "SAVOR YOUR BODY'S BLK BETWEEN BEG BORN AND DYG," WHICH THE NTEXT OF AIDS AND THE ATH OF RELIGN IS ONE OF THE FEW OPTNS LEFT TO ANYONE {FONT-SIZE:16.5PX;LE-HEIGHT:26PX;BOX-SIZG:NTENT-BOX;MAX-WIDTH:600PX;PADDG:0PX 20PX;MARG:0PX TO;MARG:1EM TO;} A{LOR:#7B1B18;}WANT TO KEEP UP WH BREAKG NEWS? 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- BAKE OFF EXTRA'S TOM ALLEN: 'I WANTED TO BE AN ACTOR – BUT TURNED OUT I WAS JT GAY'
FORMER WOOD-TV8 REPORTER BRAD EDWARDS: GROWG UP GAY GRAND RAPIDS WAS TOUGH
Hillen is gay and he is a relatnship wh Brian Contreras.
My Queer Body, performed by Tim Miller on October 4 and 5Appropriately chosen Morrissey mic hummed the background, while the dience, primarily posed of gay male upl, filtered . Those faiar wh Miller's work should know that, wh this highly personal performance, he has taken a step a new urse, there was an unabashed polil overtone to this event, sponsored by GLAD (Gay & Lbian Advot & Defenrs): Miller exhorted his dience to vote, and to vote Democrat, wh the phy observatn that we "really n't take four more years of sh.
" Neverthels, the overall foc was firmly on beg gay and beg Tim was drsed wh nspicuo rmaly; almost as a self-parody, wh his black jeans, black leather jacket and, naturally, the metaphoril heart on his sleeve: a pk triangle, stark agast the black. Workg on the premise that homosexuals have a far greater awarens of the flh--havg been tght sce childhood to supprs s sir and ntrol s longgs--he began by "summong the body, " and traipsed his way through the dience, extollg the praise of one man's foot, a woman's fgers.
TIM MILLER BAR QUEER BODY IN ORIGAL STAGE {FONT-SIZE:20PX;LOR:#999;FONT-STYLE:ALIC;MARG:0PX;MARG-TOP:10PX;}THE "QUEER POT OF LIGHT" OFFERS UP HIS BODY AND SOUL FOR PRENTATN ON {GRID-ROW-START:2;GRID-LUMN-START:2;GRID-LUMN-END:3;}@MEDIA (MAX-WIDTH:950PX){{GRID-LUMN-START:1;GRID-LUMN-END:2;}}{BOX-SIZG:NTENT-BOX;MAX-WIDTH:600PX;PADDG:0PX 20PX;MARG:0PX TO;FONT-FAY:'COLABORATE LIGHT','LUCIDA SANS UNI',SANS-SERIF;MARG-BOTTOM:5PX;} A{LOR:#7B1B18;} IMG{PADDG-RIGHT:7PX;}BY {LOR:#BA0600;}ASHWI {BOX-SIZG:NTENT-BOX;MAX-WIDTH:600PX;PADDG:0PX 20PX;MARG:0PX TO;}{DISPLAY:NONE;}@MEDIA (MAX-WIDTH:950PX){{BOX-SIZG:NTENT-BOX;MAX-WIDTH:600PX;PADDG:0PX 20PX;MARG:0PX TO;DISPLAY:BLOCK;PADDG-TOP:20PX;PADDG-BOTTOM:20PX;MARG-TOP:20PX;BORR-TOP:1PX SOLID #EBEBEB;BORR-BOTTOM:1PX SOLID #EBEBEB;}}{DISPLAY:-WEBK-BOX;DISPLAY:-WEBK-FLEX;DISPLAY:-MS-FLEXBOX;DISPLAY:FLEX;-WEBK-FLEX-DIRECTN:LUMN;-MS-FLEX-DIRECTN:LUMN;FLEX-DIRECTN:LUMN;WIDTH:TO;-WEBK-ALIGN-EMS:CENTER;-WEBK-BOX-ALIGN:CENTER;-MS-FLEX-ALIGN:CENTER;ALIGN-EMS:CENTER;POSN:-WEBK-STICKY;POSN:STICKY;TOP:70PX;-WEBK-FLEX-DIRECTN:ROW;-MS-FLEX-DIRECTN:ROW;FLEX-DIRECTN:ROW;-WEBK-BOX-PACK:CENTER;-WEBK-JTIFY-NTENT:CENTER;-MS-FLEX-PACK:CENTER;JTIFY-NTENT:CENTER;POSN:UNSET;} {DISPLAY:LE-BLOCK;PADDG:0PX;} > SPAN{WIDTH:35PX !IMPORTANT;HEIGHT:35PX !IMPORTANT;TEXT-ALIGN:CENTER;BORR-RADI:50%;} SVG{WIDTH:25PX !IMPORTANT;HEIGHT:35PX !IMPORTANT;} .ADDTHIS_BUTTON_EMAIL > SPAN, .ADDTHIS_BUTTON_PRT > SPAN, .ADDTHIS_BUTTON_LK > SPAN{BACKGROUND-LOR:#EBEBEB !IMPORTANT;} .ADDTHIS_UNTER .ADDTHIS_BUTTON_EXPAND{WIDTH:35PX;HEIGHT:35PX;MARG:0PX;PADDG:0PX;BACKGROUND:NONE;TEXT-ALIGN:CENTER;BORR:1PX SOLID #EBEBEB;BORR-RADI:50%;LOR:#EBEBEB !IMPORTANT;} .ADDTHIS_BUTTON_PACT{DISPLAY:NONE !IMPORTANT;} {MARG:0PX 5PX;}{POSN:RELATIVE;WIDTH:100%;} P{MAX-WIDTH:600PX;MARG:0PX TO;PADDG:0PX 20PX;BOX-SIZG:NTENT-BOX;FONT:17PX/25PX GEIA,SERIF;MARG-TOP:1EM;MARG-BOTTOM:1EM;} OL{MAX-WIDTH:600PX;MARG:0PX TO;PADDG:0PX 20PX;BOX-SIZG:NTENT-BOX;FONT:17PX/25PX GEIA,SERIF;PADDG-LEFT:80PX;} P A, OL A, P A:VISED, OL A:VISED{LOR:#BA0600;-WEBK-TRANSN:0.3S ALL;TRANSN:0.3S ALL;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} P A:HOVER, OL A:HOVER{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} H1, H2, H3, H4, H5, H6{MAX-WIDTH:600PX;MARG:0PX TO;PADDG:0PX 20PX;BOX-SIZG:NTENT-BOX;MARG-TOP:1EM;MARG-BOTTOM:1EM;LOR:#7B1B18;}MY QUEER BODY, PERFORMED BY TIM MILLER ON OCTOBER 4 AND 5APPROPRIATELY CHOSEN MORRISSEY MIC HUMMED THE BACKGROUND, WHILE THE DIENCE, PRIMARILY POSED OF GAY MALE UPL, FILTERED . THERE WAS A CERTA SENSE OF ISOLATN VOLVED BEG THE MIDST OF A GROUP WHERE EVERYONE KNEW EVERYONE ELSE, AND GREETGS BETWEEN THEM FLEW THICK AND FAST.WHILE WAG FOR THE SELF-PROCLAIMED "ACTIVIST [AND] SLUTTY QUEER POT OF LIGHT," TIM MILLER, TO APPEAR ON STAGE, PEOPLE CRACKED LOUD JOK ABOUT THIS BEG "SUCH THE FAY NIGHT," AND THE BEG "THE REAL FAY VALU."MILLER ENTERED OM THE BACK OF THE THEATER WH A LE THAT WAS A FAIR DITN OF WHAT WAS TO E. "I GUS YOU ULD LL THIS A REAR ENTRY," HE CLARED BLANDLY. THOSE FAIAR WH MILLER'S WORK SHOULD KNOW THAT, WH THIS HIGHLY PERSONAL PERFORMANCE, HE HAS TAKEN A STEP A NEW DIRECTN.OF URSE, THERE WAS AN UNABASHED POLIL OVERTONE TO THIS EVENT, SPONSORED BY GLAD (GAY & LBIAN ADVOT & DEFENRS): MILLER EXHORTED HIS DIENCE TO VOTE, AND TO VOTE DEMOCRAT, WH THE PHY OBSERVATN THAT WE "REALLY N'T TAKE FOUR MORE YEARS OF SH." NEVERTHELS, THE OVERALL FOC WAS FIRMLY ON BEG GAY AND BEG TIM MILLER.MILLER WAS DRSED WH NSPICUO RMALY; ALMOST AS A SELF-PARODY, WH HIS BLACK JEANS, BLACK LEATHER JACKET AND, NATURALLY, THE METAPHORIL HEART ON HIS SLEEVE: A PK TRIANGLE, STARK AGAST THE BLACK.WORKG ON THE PREMISE THAT HOMOSEXUALS HAVE A FAR GREATER AWARENS OF THE FLH--HAVG BEEN TGHT SCE CHILDHOOD TO SUPPRS S SIR AND NTROL S LONGGS--HE BEGAN BY "SUMMONG THE BODY," AND TRAIPSED HIS WAY THROUGH THE DIENCE, EXTOLLG THE PRAISE OF ONE MAN'S FOOT, A WOMAN'S FGERS. THEN, TOWARDS THE END OF THE SHOW, HE SUMMONED THE BODY AGA. BUT THIS TIME, THE WERE THE FGERS OF A IEND, TRAMPLED AND BROKEN BY POLICEMEN AT A GAY RIGHTS RALLY, OR THE SMASHED ARM OF SOMEONE VICTIMIZED A "QUEER-BASHG" CINT.BUT SCE THIS WAS SENTIALLY MILLER'S OWN STORY, HE BEGAN AT THE BEGNG--AS A QUEER "SPERMLET" SWIMMG UPSTREAM SEARCH OF AN EGG TO FERTILIZER. THEN, HAVG A SENSE CREATED HIMSELF, HE PASSED THROUGH AN FANCY SURROUND BY "MI DYK AND FAGS" TO PUBERTY, WHEN HE "TRIED TO E NOXZEMA TO JERK OFF," TO AIDS AND THE ELECTN OF RONALD REAGAN. BY THIS TIME, HE WAS SPTG OUT HIS WORDS AN ANGRY SPRAY OF SALIVA THAT DRIFTED OVER THE FIRST FEW ROWS OF THE DIENCE.MILLER'S PERFORMANCE WAS TENSELY PHYSIL: HE SNAPPED HIS SPENRS CSANTLY, OR GRIPPED ENZIEDLY AT HIS MOUTH WHEN SCRIBG HIS FIRST KISS, SPEAKG RAPTLY OF THE MEETG OF TONGU, THE TASTE OF GUMS, THE FEEL OF THE ROOF OF THE MOUTH. AND THEN, UNR THE GLARE OF A RED LIGHT, HE STRIPPED OFF HIS CLOTH, TRYG TO ERASE THE DISGT AND GUILT STILLED HIM AS A CHILD. HOWEVER, THIS ACT WAS SLIGHTLY SPOILED BY OUR HNTG CERTALY THAT HE MIGHT NOT HAVE BEEN SO READY TO BARE HIS CHILDHOOD "SHAME" IF HE HAD NOT HAD SUCH A SLENR, YOUTHFUL, MCULAR BODY TO TAKE PRI .MILLER OFTEN ED FOUR LETTER WORDS, AND OFFENSIVE TERMS SUCH AS "DYKE," "FAG," OR "HALF-MAN," BUT HIS METHOD OF LIVERG THEM, AND HIS ACCEPTANCE OF THEM AS A MATTER OF URSE SOMEHOW RECLAIMED THEM OM HE TALKED ABOUT HIS EXPERIENCE AS "A YOUNG FAG LOVE, SRED SHLS," WAS TOUCHG AND FUNNY, NEVER {DISPLAY:BLOCK;MARG:0PX TO;WIDTH:100%;MAX-WIDTH:100%;BACKGROUND:TRANSPARENT;PADDG:10PX 0PX;} {FONT-FAY:'COLABORATE LIGHT','LUCIDA SANS UNI',SANS-SERIF;LOR:#333333;TEXT-ALIGN:CENTER;FONT-SIZE:0.7EM;TEXT-TRANSFORM:UPPERSE;DISPLAY:BLOCK;} {WIDTH:-WEBK-F-NTENT;WIDTH:-MOZ-F-NTENT;WIDTH:F-NTENT;MARG:0PX TO;TEXT-ALIGN:CENTER;}ADVERTISEMENTHOWEVER, MILLER'S HAB OF BLENDG EDY WH TRAGEDY WAS OFTEN ODDLY UNSETTLG. HE CROONED ABOUT HIS TEENAGE BOYIEND OVER THE SWAY OF IRONILLY WAILG VLS. OR HE WAXED PHILOSOPHIL ABOUT THE FACT THAT "OUR BODI ARE ONLY GOOD FOR ATH"--STOPPG EVERY TEN SENDS TO ADJURE HIS PENIS A HARSH WHISPER TO "GET HARD" AND PROVI HIM WH THE GRAND FAL BE THAT HE NEED.MILLER'S MIMAL E OF PROPS WAS ALSO TERTG. A SILVER CROSS SLUNG AROUND HIS NECK JGLED AGAST THE HIGH SCHOOL RG GIVEN HIM BY HIS BOYIEND "OM ANAHEIM." HE ALSO CRADLED A PIECE OF SOLIDIFIED LAVA TO HIS CHT AS HE TALKED ABOUT THE "EPTN" OF AIDS THAT HAD BURIED SO MANY OF HIS IENDS.BUT PERHAPS THE MOST FASCATG ASPECT OF TIM MILLER'S PERFORMANCE WAS THE EFFORT HE MA TO BREAK DOWN MENTAL BOUNDARI: BETWEEN HIMSELF AND THE DIENCE AS HE PERCHED NAKED ON A YOUNG MAN'S LAP, OR ASKED A WOMAN TO STROKE HIS CHT, RIGHT ABOVE THE HEART. HE BROKE DOWN THE BOUNDARI BETWEEN MALE AND FEMALE, A SURREALISTIC FANTASY SCENE WHERE HE VISUALIZED HIMSELF GIVG BIRTH (VIA THE AN) TO THE BODI OF ALL HIS AD IENDS, AS HE RECREATED THEM BY TALKG ABOUT THEM.AND, ABOVE ALL, MILLER DISSOLVED THE LE DIVIDG TTH OM FALLACY. AT THE END OF HIS PERFORMANCE, THE ANNOUNCED: "I LIED," WHOUT SPECIFYG WHAT HE HAD LIED ABOUT. IT IS NOT IMPORTANT, SURELY, WHETHER THE TAILS OF HIS LIFE WHICH HE MENTNED WERE FACT OR FICTN-- WAS ENOUGH THE TO KNOW THAT THEY ULD HAVE BEEN TE, AND THAT SUCH THGS HAD ALMOST CERTALY HAPPENED TO SOMEONE ELSE.THERE ARE CERTALY TIM WHEN MILLER'S MONOLOGUE IS A LTLE TOO FULL OF SLICK L: WHEN HE ASKS GOD RHETORILLY WHY HE HAS BEEN SPARED ATH OM AIDS WHILE SO MANY OF HIS IENDS HAVE DIED, OR WHEN HE, AS THE SPOKMAN FOR ALL GAY MEN, URG THEM TO "BARE OUR SOULS AND OUR BUTTHOL." BUT HIS VISN OF LIFE AND LOVE IS ENDURG: LOVERS ARE "NAKED THE SIGHT OF EACH OTHER, WHO ARE THE ONLY ON WHO MATTER," OR, MORE BLUNTLY: "WE N'T LET THE RIGHT-WG FUCKHEADS TELL HOW TO FUCK."MILLER, AWARE OF THE AGILY OF LIFE, TOLD THE DIENCE TO "SAVOR YOUR BODY'S BLK BETWEEN BEG BORN AND DYG," WHICH THE NTEXT OF AIDS AND THE ATH OF RELIGN IS ONE OF THE FEW OPTNS LEFT TO ANYONE {FONT-SIZE:16.5PX;LE-HEIGHT:26PX;BOX-SIZG:NTENT-BOX;MAX-WIDTH:600PX;PADDG:0PX 20PX;MARG:0PX TO;MARG:1EM TO;} A{LOR:#7B1B18;}WANT TO KEEP UP WH BREAKG NEWS? 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But this time, the were the fgers of a iend, trampled and broken by policemen at a gay rights rally, or the smashed arm of someone victimized a "queer-bashg" sce this was sentially Miller's own story, he began at the begng--as a queer "spermlet" swimmg upstream search of an egg to fertilizer. It is not important, surely, whether the tails of his life which he mentned were fact or fictn-- was enough the to know that they uld have been te, and that such thgs had almost certaly happened to someone are certaly tim when Miller's monologue is a ltle too full of slick l: when he asks God rhetorilly why he has been spared ath om AIDS while so many of his iends have died, or when he, as the spokman for all gay men, urg them to "bare our souls and our butthol. “I often lay the sense that I was an outsir at the feet of beg gay, ” he says.
BAKE OFF EXTRA'S TOM ALLEN: 'I WANTED TO BE AN ACTOR – BUT TURNED OUT I WAS JT GAY'
Photograph: Wenn Rights/AlamyTake the scene where he is beaten up at school by a fellow pupil, only to blame himself afterwards for failg to nceal those tell-tale signs of gayns that flamed his attacker.
”He also walked off stage durg his early standup years rponse to homophobic abe om a heckler. Lookg back on his teens, he says: “I wanted to be an actor but turned out I was jt gay. The days he tackl his sexualy on stage wh a claratn (“Y, I’m gay”) followed by a “Who knew?