Si Guys: Thkg Beyond Gay Male "Tops" and "Bottoms" | Psychology Today

Contents:

• GAY "SIS": HOW LANGUAGE FRE US TO BE OURSELV
• SI GUYS: THKG BEYOND GAY MALE "TOPS" AND "BOTTOMS"
• WHAT IS WRONG WH GAY CHRISTIANY? WHAT IS SI A AND SI B ANYWAY?
• ABOUT THE CENTERSCE 1983 THE CENTER HAS BEEN SUPPORTG, FOSTERG AND CELEBRATG THE LGBT MUNY OF NEW YORK CY. FD MORE RMATN ON AND OUR WORK ABOUT THE CENTER. VIS ABOUT THE CENTEROUR MISSNCYBER CENTERCENTER HISTORYRACE EQUYMEDIA CENTERLEARSHIP & STAFFEMPLOYMENT OPPORTUNICORPORATE PARTNERSHIPSANNUAL REPORTS & FANCIAL INFORMATNCONTACT USHOURS & LOTNSEMAPSUPPORT THE CENTER
• EXPLORG WHO IS AND WHAT MAK A GAY “DADDY”
• LBIAN, GAY, BISEXUAL, TRANSGENR, AND QUEER MUNY
• WHY GAYBORHOODS MATTER: THE STREET EMPIRICS OF URBAN SEXUALI

GAY "SIS": HOW LANGUAGE FRE US TO BE OURSELV

A third add: “Personally I’m not crazy about the term ‘si’ (sounds to me like someone lyg there, dog not much) but ’s good that Grdr acknowledg that there’s more to gay sex than anal. The gay datg app Grdr n seem like a mefield wh s extensive e of slang – here’s what terms like GEN, NPNC and si is the most popular LGBTQ datg app the world and a cemented part of gay culture.

While grateful for the experience of beg gay, Hartley se his gay inty as somethg that go beyond jt sex — “I never say that I’m grateful for same-sex sexual sire, ” he said — also clus athetics, culture and worldview. On the flip si, some progrsive crics, who are fewer number, said Hill and Hartley, see Si B as another eratn of the ex-gay movement or a form of rpectabily polics where LGBTQ dividuals reprs their sexualy to w approval om the broar church.

Th agreed and add that the motivatns behd Si B and the ex-gay movement are entirely different; one is tryg to make gay people straight, and the other is tryg to expand how the church views love and kship.

SI GUYS: THKG BEYOND GAY MALE "TOPS" AND "BOTTOMS"

“Si B me out of dissatisfactn wh the simple and easy answers of the ex-gay movement, ” said Hartley, “and so, embracg plexy or allowg plexy is ntrast to that sistence on uniformy. That’s what happened 2013 when, an article I wrote for the Huffgton Post, “Guys on the Si, ” I created the term “si” for gay men who aren’t to beg a “top” or a “bottom” or practicg anal peratn. The term “Si” was created when 2010, I was talkg wh some lleagu about “tops” (gay men who prefer the sertive role durg peratn) and “bottoms” (gay men who prefer the receptive role durg peratn) and outed myself for beg a gay man who don’t engage anal terurse at all.

Beg a “top, ” “bottom, ” or “vers” (short for "versatile, " or someone who uld go eher way) were the only acceptable mols the gay muny, and I felt dissed for not ftg to the mold. About a year and a half ago I formed a Facebook group lled “Si Guys” and some of the guys the group started a petn to Grdr, the gay datg app, to add “si” to their list of preferred posns and filters.

WHAT IS WRONG WH GAY CHRISTIANY? WHAT IS SI A AND SI B ANYWAY?

Back 2011, an article was published the Journal of Sexual Medice which rearchers surveyed 25, 000 gay and bisexual men Ameri about their most recent sexual enunters, and only 36 percent said they had bottomed, and 34 percent said they had topped. Ally: A person who supports and rpects sexual diversy, acts acrdgly to challenge homophobic and heterosexist remarks and behavrs, and is willg to explore and unrstand the forms of bias wh themselv.

The term n also exclively refer to men who are emotnally, romantilly, sexually, affectnately, or relatnally attracted to other men, or who intify as members of the gay muny. Bee most LGBTQ people are raised the same society as heterosexuals, they learn the same beliefs and stereotyp prevalent the domant society, leadg to a phenomenon known as ternalized homophobia, whereas LGBTQ-intified dividuals feel shame, guilt or hatred towards the part of themselv intified as LGBTQ. Leather culture is most visible gay muni and most often associated wh gay men (“leathermen”), but is also reflected var ways the gay, lbian, bisexual, and heterosexual worlds.

“the homosexual liftyle.” Many people fd this word appropriate bee trivializ inty, impli that sexual orientatn is a choice, and ignor the variety of liftyl that LGBTQ people live. Pri: A healthy self-rpect, which, the ntext of the gay muny, promot empowerment, tn, safe livg, and the sense that is “okay to be LGBT+.” Also ed to refer to Pri month season and events June.

ABOUT THE CENTERSCE 1983 THE CENTER HAS BEEN SUPPORTG, FOSTERG AND CELEBRATG THE LGBT MUNY OF NEW YORK CY. FD MORE RMATN ON AND OUR WORK ABOUT THE CENTER. VIS ABOUT THE CENTEROUR MISSNCYBER CENTERCENTER HISTORYRACE EQUYMEDIA CENTERLEARSHIP & STAFFEMPLOYMENT OPPORTUNICORPORATE PARTNERSHIPSANNUAL REPORTS & FANCIAL INFORMATNCONTACT USHOURS & LOTNSEMAPSUPPORT THE CENTER

But what if you’re a gay man who don’t enjoy anal sex or fds anal peratn paful, don’t like the feelg or the troublome amount of preparatn and cleang up need for to be a pleasurable experience, or simply don’t experience anal sex as erotic? That’s why a 2013 article I wrote for Huffgton Post, "Guys on the ‘Si’: Lookg Beyond Gay Tops and Bottoms, " I began workg on popularizg the term “si” orr for the gay men to have the language to exprs their sexual and erotic preference. They are supported by the Gay Christian Network, or Si A (which sanctns same-sex marriage and believ that homosexualy is jt one of many forms of diverse sexualy that the church should wele), and the Spirual Friendship ter muny, or Si B (which believ that homosexualy is not a morally culpable issue, although is a nsequence of the brokenns om the Fall; Si B teach agast homosexual sexual practice, but only for the sake of Christian tradn).

E., there is such a thg as a gay person—that gayns scrib who someone sentially is), their theology no way allows for an unrstandg of why homosexualy, even at the level of sire, is sful and needg the grace of repentance.

As our age note on the term stat, “up until 1973, homosexualy was listed The Diagnostic and Statistil Manual of Mental Disorrs (DSM), psychiatry’s standard reference on the classifitn of mental illns.

EXPLORG WHO IS AND WHAT MAK A GAY “DADDY”

And many feel that this word plac undue emphasis on sexual activy, or that sounds overly clil.” In fact, the term homosexual was liberately rejected by early gay rights activists bee, acrdg to The New York Tim, “they did not want to be intified as exclively sexual begs.”. Partially rponse to Stonewall, 1970, queer activists New York Cy anized a march to Central Park wh the theme “Gay Pri.” A more prehensive history of the Stonewall Rt or the Stonewall Uprisg n be found our Pri Month explaer.

While the term “daddy” has gotten more and more popular the gay muny over the past several years, therapist Matthew Dempsey’s latt YouTube vio explor what mak a gay “daddy?

Dempsey enlists the aid of his iend and “rint daddy, ” Eric Rutherford, to chat on how beg a gay “daddy” affects gay men regard to agg, datg, and takg re of yourself mentally and physilly. lbian, gay, bisexual, transgenr, and queer muny (LGBTQ muny), also lled LGBTQ+ muny, any untry, regn, cy, or other loly, a group of persons who intify as lbian, gay ( the narrow sense of beg a male who is sexually or romantilly attracted to other mal), bisexual, transgenr, or queer and who feel some gree of empathy and solidary wh each other based on their shared experience of prejudice, discrimatn, and disrpect or their awarens of the historil and ntemporary opprsn of lbian, gay, bisexual, transgenr, and queer (LGBTQ) persons. Gut Edor (s): Alex Bterman17 and Daniel Baldw Hs1817Department of Archecture and Dign, Aled State Universy of New York, New York, USA 18Department of Urban and Regnal Planng, Universy at Buffalo, Buffalo, NY USA AbstractUrbanists have veloped an extensive set of proposns about why gay neighborhoods form, how they change, shifts their signifince, and their spatial exprsns.

LBIAN, GAY, BISEXUAL, TRANSGENR, AND QUEER MUNY

In this chapter, I e the rintial logics of queer people—why they their own words say that they live a gay district—to show how gayborhoods acquire their signifince on the streets.

By shiftg the analytic gaze om abstract ncepts to teractns and embodied perceptns on the ground—a “street empirics” as I ll —I challenge the claim that gayborhoods as an urban form are outmod or obsolete. Keywords: Urban sexuali, Technology, Gay neighborhoods, LGBTQ+ safe spacIntroductn: Gayborhood StudiThe associatn between sexualy and the cy is as tablished experientially as is affirmed the amy—om sexologil unts of sexual practic to thick ethnographic scriptns of the moral regns of urban sexual worlds (Ksey et al.

Scholars ask why gayborhoods first formed (Castells and Murphy 1982; Knopp 1997; Lewis 2013), how they have changed over time (Kanai and Kenttamaa-Squir 2015; Rhbrook 2002; Stryker and Van Bkirk 1996), their cultural signifince for queer people (Doan and Higgs 2011; Greene 2014; Orne 2017), why they appeal to heterosexuals (Brodyn and Ghaziani 2018; Ghaziani 2019d), and their diverse spatial exprsns ( Brown-Saraco 2018; Ghaziani 2019a; Whtemore and Smart 2016).

WHY GAYBORHOODS MATTER: THE STREET EMPIRICS OF URBAN SEXUALI

For example, standard scholarly acunts pot to enomic forc, pecially gentrifitn, to expla why gayborhoods form and change (Christafore and Leguizamon 2018; Colls 2004; Rutg 2008). This prompted follow-up qutns about whether gay districts remble ethnic ghettos (Leve 1979; Wirth 1928) and if gay bars are better nceptualized as private (Weightman 1980) or closet-like spac (Brown 2000). Some rearchers show that people e technology creatively to image new spac away om the gayborhood (Wu and Ward 2017), while others argue that apps reproduce equali (Conner 2018) than origs, anizatns, and technology, rearchers who work a fourth stream of gayborhood studi document mographic chang (Moral 2018; Sprg 2013) and nsir their effects on muny-buildg and placemakg efforts ( Brown-Saraco 2011; Casey 2004; Ghaziani and Stillwagon 2018; Rennger 2019).

In San Francis, Mattson (2015) shows that the populary of gay bars among straight people has nearly wiped them out; their numbers dropped om thirteen to three jt eleven years. Bs, non-prof, and other anizatnal listgs; overall stutnal posn; pri paras, ftivals, and other cultural events; cross-natnal parisonsTechnologyHow do geo-d mobile apps affect gayborhoods? Cens tracts, real tate ads, bs and non-prof listgs, llective memori, revenu, nighttime enomy, pop-ups, cultural archipelagosAlthough scholars have produced nsirable knowledge about gayborhoods, a key oversight remas: what do the gayborhood mean for the people who actually live ?

By batg macro stctural forc like gentrifitn, assiatn, technology, and mography, rearchers who work gayborhood studi eli matters of meang, teractns, imprsns, and terpretatns. I draw on more than six hundred natnal media reports about the gayborhood across several s of verage, particularly stori which a journalist terviewed lol rints, to intify six major reasons why queer people say they live a gay district and what about appeals to them. 2 Non-rintial stakeholrs make “vir” claims on gayborhoods as well (Greene 2014), but the are precisely what the ncept of virns suggts: proxy experienc that take the place of, or are imaged as related to, the on of rints.