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Contents:
- WHY DO GAY MEN WALK SO FAST?
- ARTISAN OWL I'M SO GAY I CAN'T EVEN DRIVE STRAIGHT - FLEXIBLE CAR AUTO BUMPER MAG - HILAR!
- “I’M SO GAY THAT I CAN’T EVEN DRIVE STRAIGHT!”
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- WHY DO GAY MEN WALK SO FAST?
- SECRETSMARY LAMBERTTRACK 1 ON HEART ON MY SLEEVE PRODUCED BYBENNY CASSETTE, ERIC ROSSE & 1 MORE“SECRETS” IS THE SEND SGLE OM MARY LAMBERT’S BUT ALBUM, HEART ON MY SLEEVE. THE SONG IS ABOUT BEG TE TO YOURSELF, AND LETTG PEOPLE KNOW WHO YOU REALLY ARE.JUL. 15, 20141 VIEWER41.2K VIEWS24 CONTRIBUTORSSECRETS LYRICS[INTRO]OKAYGAME FACETHERE WE GO[VERSE 1]I'VE GOT BIPOLAR DISORRMY SH'S NOT ORRI'M OVERWEIGHT, I'M ALWAYS LATEI'VE GOT TOO MANY THGS TO SAYI ROCK MOM JEANS, T EARRGSEXTRAPOLATE MY FEELGSMY FAY IS DYSFUNCTNALBUT WE HAVE A GOOD TIME KILLG EACH OTHER[PRE-CHOS]THEY TELL OM THE TIME WE'RE YOUNGTO HI THE THGS THAT WE DON'T LIKE ABOUT OURSELVINSI OURSELVI KNOW I'M NOT THE ONLY ONEWHO SPENT SO LONG ATTEMPTG TO BE SOMEONE ELSEWELL, I'M OVER [CHOS]I DON'T RE IF THE WORLD KNOWS WHAT MY SECRETS ARESECRETS AREI DON'T RE IF THE WORLD KNOWS WHAT MY SECRETS ARESECRETS AREYOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE[POST-CHOS]SO, WHAT?SO, WHAT?SO, WHAT?SO, WHAT?[VERSE 2]I N'T THK STRAIGHT, I'M SO GAYSOMETIM I CRY A WHOLE DAYI RE A LOT, E AN ANALOG CLOCKAND NEVER KNOW WHEN TO STOPAND I'M PASSIVE AGGRSIVEI'M SRED OF THE DARK AND THE NTISTI LOVE MY BUTT AND WON'T SHUT UPAND I NEVER REALLY GREW UP[PRE-CHOS]THEY TELL OM THE TIME WE'RE YOUNGTO HI THE THGS THAT WE DON'T LIKE ABOUT OURSELVINSI OURSELVI KNOW I'M NOT THE ONLY ONEWHO SPENT SO LONG ATTEMPTG TO BE SOMEONE ELSEWELL, I'M OVER [CHOS]I DON'T RE IF THE WORLD KNOWS WHAT MY SECRETS ARESECRETS AREI DON'T RE IF THE WORLD KNOWS WHAT MY SECRETS ARESECRETS ARE[POST-CHOS]SO, WHAT?SO, WHAT?SO, WHAT?SO, WHAT?[BRIDGE]EEEEEEH OOOH OOOOOHHH OOOOOOOOH(HA HA HA HA HA)[CHOS]I DON'T RE IF THE WORLD KNOWS WHAT MY SECRETS ARE (SECRETS ARE)SECRETS AREI DON'T RE IF THE WORLD KNOWS WHAT MY SECRETS ARE (SECRETS ARE)SECRETS ARE[POST-CHOS]SO, WHAT?SO, WHAT?SO, WHAT?SO, WHAT?[OUTRO]SO, WHAT?SO, WHAT?(I DON'T RE IF THE WORLD KNOWS WHAT MY SECRETS ARE)SO, WHAT?SO, WHAT?27EMBEDCANCELHOW TO FORMAT LYRICS:TYPE OUT ALL LYRICS, EVEN REPEATG SONG PARTS LIKE THE CHOSLYRICS SHOULD BE BROKEN DOWN TO DIVIDUAL LUSE SECTN HEARS ABOVE DIFFERENT SONG PARTS LIKE [VERSE], [CHOS], ETC.USE ALICS (<I>LYRIC</I>) AND BOLD (<B>LYRIC</B>) TO DISTGUISH BETWEEN DIFFERENT VOLISTS THE SAME SONG PARTIF YOU DON’T UNRSTAND A LYRIC, E [?]TO LEARN MORE, CHECK OUT OUR TRANSCRIPTN GUI OR VIS OUR TRANSCRIBERS FOMABOUT
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WHY DO GAY MEN WALK SO FAST?
The tth behd Twter’s favore stereotype about gay men, as explaed by GQ ntributor Louis Stapl. * im so gay i can't even walk straight *
Growg up, people would often tell me that I “walked gay. ” I ed to wonr how puttg one foot ont of the other uld seem gay, but I heard so equently that I accepted as tth. To fd out what else was gay, I looked to popular-culture, where I saw gay men mostly adherg to a fairly one-dimensnal set of stereotyp: fashnable, wty, effemate.
Historilly, gay stereotyp have been even ls kd. Yet today’s gay men aren’t as reliant on reprentatns crafted by others, wh social media helpg to mocratize storytellg by providg a platform for people to share their experienc.
Inevably, gay people beg active onle (Twter gays, I’m lookg at you) has ed new stereotyp to emerge.
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From “gays n’t drive” to “gays love iced ffee, ” new on seem to appear every day. Earlier this year, Vice wrer Jam Greig attempted to fact-check the “new gay stereotyp.
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The r ont of me has a sticker sayg, “I’m so Gay that I n’t even drive straight!”. Of urse, as a gay man, I felt related to that phrase. The driver that r was wearg a vivid blue… * im so gay i can't even walk straight *
” GQ wrer Alim Kheraj also vtigated the gay love of iced ffee. Both found the accuracy of the new trop difficult to prove, but explored their plex and often ntradictory that sense, the new(ish) stereotype that “gay men walk fast” is no different.
If “walkg gay” really is a thg, seems that many gay people perceive speed to be a part of that.
On Twter, one person wr: “Straight people, look behd you, chanc are there's a gay person tryg to get past bee you're movg at an extremely glacial pace. ” Others joke that gays n halve the journey time timate on most travel apps, or suggt that gay men walk fast “to flee the straights” bee “they learned to walk to the beat of ‘Womanizer’ by Brney Spears.
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To create “gay walkg lan” bee gay men supposedly walk so a fast walker, I’ve fely been there: that moment when you’re walkg through a public place, listeng to “Jump” by Madonna, and the (prumably heterosexual) public n’t seen to hurry up and get out of your way. But beyond my personal experience, and the admtedly pretty lazy humor of “gays walk fast” jok, is there any tth to the stereotype?
There’s never been a scientific study parg gay walkg speed wh straight men of a siar age and physil ndn. We know that gay men tend to gravate towards urban areas, where walkg is the flt travel method.
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Gay men the Uned Kgdom, for example, are 30% ls likely to own a r when pared to the average populatn, ditg that they’re more acctomed to walkg. Confince ach Lisa Phillips says that a fear of homophobia strangers uld make gay men walk quickly.
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“If gay men feel self-nsc or fear attack, they uld walk quickly to get away om perceived risks orr to feel safe aga, ” she explas. ”Sam, a 26-year-old gay man om London, agre wh this. “I lived Sydney for 20 years and there were a lot of nfint walkers Oxford Street, one of Sydney's gay areas, as this was a ‘safe’ area for people.
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Psychologist Ian MacRae agre that walkg speed and style n be affected by eher posive or negative emotns, but also says that gay men are statistilly predisposed to walkg fast. So already younger men ci are the fastt walkers–perhaps gays jt have an edge on that?
”MacRae tells me that walkg fast might be a method for gay men to give a “visual cue” of their physil fns and attractivens, and that there’s a genred element to how we perceive sexualy that may fluence walkg speed.
“People are much better at tellg male sexualy based on movement, like ‘walkg gay’ or ‘movg gay. ’ So gay men uppg the pace of their walkg also amplifi their sexualy. Stttg, or walkg at a rapid pace, n be a way of displayg homosexualy safe spac.
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”Regardls of whether gay men really do walk fast, there are psychologil reasons why many of want to embrace the ia that we do. I often worry that fdg some of the newer gay trop funny –mostly, if I’m hont, bee many of them apply to me– mak me sufferably self-absorbed.
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”Benno Gammerl, a lecturer on Goldsmhs Universy’s MA Queer History London, thks that “gay’s walk fast” is rooted stereotyp of urban gay life. “Gay men om the untrysi have very specific stereotyp of urban gay men, ” he says.
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“Velocy and petivens is a part of that: a sense of urban life beg quick, and that a gay man has to be quicker than all the rt. ”Gammerl explas that is no cince that someone like me feels reprented by the stereotyp and helps to spread them, bee young, urban-dwellg gay men are central to society’s mappg of what gay men are like.
Among this domant group, the ia of “quickns” beg a sirable gay qualy go beyond physil speed. “In many gay bgraphi we see the ia that opportuni were missed youth, so gay adults don’t want to miss a thg.
WHY DO GAY MEN WALK SO FAST?
The tth behd Twter’s favore stereotype about gay men, as explaed by GQ ntributor Louis Stapl. * im so gay i can't even walk straight *
”Like MacRae, Gammerl spects that hierarchi are behd the populary of the “gays walk fast” stereotype. For stance, gay men om ci (like me) might e this trope to subtly posn themselv as superr to suburban and ral people, who they associate wh beg behd the tim and irrelevant.
This uld also expla the dista for “slow” straight people that is exprsed the majory of fast-walkg gay jok. “There’s a clear gay / straight divi, ” Gammerl observ.
“Not only are straight people slow movers, but they’re also slow bee they nnot follow the speedy jok and quips that gay men make. ”It’s te that beg seen as a fast adopter of new mic, fashn or pop-culture rri valuable social currency gay culture. For example, “sissy that walk”—a drag term meang “to stt the most feme way possible”—was turned to a pop banger by drag superstar Twter—or more precisely “Gay Twter, ” on which I spend far too much time —appearg to be “booked and by” will w you pliments.
SECRETSMARY LAMBERTTRACK 1 ON HEART ON MY SLEEVE PRODUCED BYBENNY CASSETTE, ERIC ROSSE & 1 MORE“SECRETS” IS THE SEND SGLE OM MARY LAMBERT’S BUT ALBUM, HEART ON MY SLEEVE. THE SONG IS ABOUT BEG TE TO YOURSELF, AND LETTG PEOPLE KNOW WHO YOU REALLY ARE.JUL. 15, 20141 VIEWER41.2K VIEWS24 CONTRIBUTORSSECRETS LYRICS[INTRO]OKAYGAME FACETHERE WE GO[VERSE 1]I'VE GOT BIPOLAR DISORRMY SH'S NOT ORRI'M OVERWEIGHT, I'M ALWAYS LATEI'VE GOT TOO MANY THGS TO SAYI ROCK MOM JEANS, T EARRGSEXTRAPOLATE MY FEELGSMY FAY IS DYSFUNCTNALBUT WE HAVE A GOOD TIME KILLG EACH OTHER[PRE-CHOS]THEY TELL OM THE TIME WE'RE YOUNGTO HI THE THGS THAT WE DON'T LIKE ABOUT OURSELVINSI OURSELVI KNOW I'M NOT THE ONLY ONEWHO SPENT SO LONG ATTEMPTG TO BE SOMEONE ELSEWELL, I'M OVER [CHOS]I DON'T RE IF THE WORLD KNOWS WHAT MY SECRETS ARESECRETS AREI DON'T RE IF THE WORLD KNOWS WHAT MY SECRETS ARESECRETS AREYOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE[POST-CHOS]SO, WHAT?SO, WHAT?SO, WHAT?SO, WHAT?[VERSE 2]I N'T THK STRAIGHT, I'M SO GAYSOMETIM I CRY A WHOLE DAYI RE A LOT, E AN ANALOG CLOCKAND NEVER KNOW WHEN TO STOPAND I'M PASSIVE AGGRSIVEI'M SRED OF THE DARK AND THE NTISTI LOVE MY BUTT AND WON'T SHUT UPAND I NEVER REALLY GREW UP[PRE-CHOS]THEY TELL OM THE TIME WE'RE YOUNGTO HI THE THGS THAT WE DON'T LIKE ABOUT OURSELVINSI OURSELVI KNOW I'M NOT THE ONLY ONEWHO SPENT SO LONG ATTEMPTG TO BE SOMEONE ELSEWELL, I'M OVER [CHOS]I DON'T RE IF THE WORLD KNOWS WHAT MY SECRETS ARESECRETS AREI DON'T RE IF THE WORLD KNOWS WHAT MY SECRETS ARESECRETS ARE[POST-CHOS]SO, WHAT?SO, WHAT?SO, WHAT?SO, WHAT?[BRIDGE]EEEEEEH OOOH OOOOOHHH OOOOOOOOH(HA HA HA HA HA)[CHOS]I DON'T RE IF THE WORLD KNOWS WHAT MY SECRETS ARE (SECRETS ARE)SECRETS AREI DON'T RE IF THE WORLD KNOWS WHAT MY SECRETS ARE (SECRETS ARE)SECRETS ARE[POST-CHOS]SO, WHAT?SO, WHAT?SO, WHAT?SO, WHAT?[OUTRO]SO, WHAT?SO, WHAT?(I DON'T RE IF THE WORLD KNOWS WHAT MY SECRETS ARE)SO, WHAT?SO, WHAT?27EMBEDCANCELHOW TO FORMAT LYRICS:TYPE OUT ALL LYRICS, EVEN REPEATG SONG PARTS LIKE THE CHOSLYRICS SHOULD BE BROKEN DOWN TO DIVIDUAL LUSE SECTN HEARS ABOVE DIFFERENT SONG PARTS LIKE [VERSE], [CHOS], ETC.USE ALICS (<I>LYRIC</I>) AND BOLD (<B>LYRIC</B>) TO DISTGUISH BETWEEN DIFFERENT VOLISTS THE SAME SONG PARTIF YOU DON’T UNRSTAND A LYRIC, E [?]TO LEARN MORE, CHECK OUT OUR TRANSCRIPTN GUI OR VIS OUR TRANSCRIBERS FOMABOUT
* im so gay i can't even walk straight *
New meme formats appear almost as quickly as they disappear, like the wily circulated meme of a gay man bargg ont of a lleague, sayg “move, I’m gay.
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” Jok like this both mock and rerce the hierarchal stereotype unrpng them: that gay men are quick, and therefore superr, bee we simply don’t have a send to waste. Quickly graspg the “ joke” that others might not unrstand ( this se, that gay men are lerally fast movers) adds a further dimensn to the perceived rrelatn between quickns and many of the “new” gay stereotyp, “gays walk fast” helps accs a shared muny wh humor and togetherns.
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It’s unsurprisg, after s of unkd and homophobic stereotypg, that gay men might embrace more posive generalizatns. Though ’s important to remember that life isn’t all stttg at break-neck speed om bnch to Grdr hookups (while blastg Carly Rae Jepsen, of urse) for every gay man. We might be the hab of puttg each other to ltle gay box which have a perceived hierarchy attached to them, om “tops and bottoms” to “daddi and twks”, but all gays are created equal.
Y, that’s right, even gays who move at a glacial pace (or, god forbid, live outsi the cy) serve rights too. Ultimately, we don’t know whether gay men actually do walk faster than straight men.
But while might seem like a fairly superficial stereotype, the potential reasons why gay men might be keen to embody velocy are anythg but if you’ll exce me, I’ve got iced ffee to drk, rs not to drive, straight people to barge past, [redacted] pics to take and vios of Christe Baranski sayg “gay rights!