Maybe 'that's so gay' is actually ok for young people to say

Contents:

• THE GRIM TTH OF BEG GAY PRISON
• ‘I AM GAY – BUT I WASN’T BORN THIS WAY’
• FOOTBALL IS SO GAY: FORCED MASCULY PRO SPORTS HALTS SOCIAL PROGRS
• FORD UNVEILED A 'VERY GAY' TCK RPONSE TO A HOMOPHOBIC COMMENTER
• TELL: AN INTIMATE HISTORY OF GAY MEN THE MILARY
• GAY CULTURE HAS GROWN TOXIC WH UNCHECKED PRIVILEGE. IT'S TIME FOR TO RET
• RAIRS’ CARL NASSIB ANNOUNC HE’S GAY, AN N.F.L. FIRST

THE GRIM TTH OF BEG GAY PRISON

In 1984, when Calv Burde was awag sentencg for allegedly stabbg his gay lover to ath, the prosecutg attorney enuraged the jury his closg remarks to award Burde the ath penalty, rather than life prison, on the grounds that sendg a gay man to prison was ak to sendg a kid to a ndy store.

His ath sentence was later overturned (mostly bee Burde's public fenr had slept through much of his trial), but the homophobic thkg – that prison is some kd of paradise for gay men – lgers realy of life prison for homosexuals and transgenr dividuals do not appear to reflect this myth. He scribed a lany of btal rap, asslts, beatgs and, eventually, the total abandonment of his male inty as his only means of survival the hyper-mascule and often homophobic prison environment. His acunt suggts that far om beg a paradise, prison for gay men n be a livg days of his first enterg prison, the 23-year-old Rodney claimed he was the victim of three separate sexual asslts, volvg five different mat.

‘I AM GAY – BUT I WASN’T BORN THIS WAY’

The prison he was first sent to did actually have a separate tier for gay mat, but acrdg to Rodney, bee he did not "appear overly effemate" durg his classifitn, he was placed wh the general populatn; and bee was supposedly rare to have a gay person slip through the cracks of the system, his fellow mat took full advantage. It's difficult to asss how typil Rodney's prison experience is, but numero studi nducted by the Bure of Jtice Statistics, based on anonymo mate surveys, have shown that gay and transgenr mat are among the most targeted groups for sexual victimizatn.

Jt Detentn Internatnal (JDI), an anizatn whose aim is to eradite prison rape (pdf), is tryg to change has been workg wh the California Department of Correctns and Rehabilatn (CDCR) to tablish "sensive needs yards" (pdf), where gay, transgenr and other vulnerable mat n serve out their time safety.

FOOTBALL IS SO GAY: FORCED MASCULY PRO SPORTS HALTS SOCIAL PROGRS

Worst of all, though, the shame attached to the memori of those first tim marred how I would approach sex for years.It was listeng to Years & Years’ new song “Sanctify,” and seeg the band’s out gay sger Olly Alexanr talk about how the song was spired his sexual trysts wh straight men, that I realized that the feelgs are way more mon than people let on.

FORD UNVEILED A 'VERY GAY' TCK RPONSE TO A HOMOPHOBIC COMMENTER

Sure, I know all about gay guys havg sex wh straight guys, but felt reassurg to see him scribe the “sat and sner role” he embodied durg those experienc, and to hear the uncertaty and melancholy weaved to the song.More than anythg though, was the repeated lyril mantra of “I won’t be ashamed.” Bee as queer people, we’re buried lifetime’s worth of shame so vivid and searg that oftentim ’s cripplg. I argued that straight men’s e of phras like “that’s so gay” uld only be unrstood by three key factors: first, the tent wh which was said; send, the social ntext (homophobic or otherwise); and third, the effect had.

If young gay people are sayg that they do not experience the phrase “that’s so gay” as homophobic – and if they are even g the phrase themselv – then perhaps we should accept their arguments and ncentrate on other battl. Growg up, there were gay kids who uld duck and ver when me to their sexualy, and then there were kids like me who get lled by their mom’s nam when they answered the phone, even though they were fourteen years old and the time for that should have passed.

You so obvly nnot be gay, was her implitn, bee this is good was 2006, a full five years before Lady Gaga would set the Born This Way argument atop s unassailable cultural perch, but even then the popular unrstandg of orientatn was that was somethg you were born wh, somethg you uldn’t change.

TELL: AN INTIMATE HISTORY OF GAY MEN THE MILARY

But what feels most accurate to say is that I’m gay – but I wasn’t born this people may fd their sir changg directn - and n't jt be explaed as experimentatn (Cred: Ignac Lehmann)In 1977, jt over 10% of Amerins thought gayns was somethg you were born wh, acrdg to Gallup.

GAY CULTURE HAS GROWN TOXIC WH UNCHECKED PRIVILEGE. IT'S TIME FOR TO RET

Throughout the same perd, the number of Amerins who believe homosexualy is “due to someone’s upbrgg/environment” fell om jt unr 60% to ias reached cril mass pop culture, first wh Lady Gaga’s 2011 Born This Way and one year later wh Macklemore’s Same Love, the chos of which has a gay person sgg “I n’t change even if I tried, even if I wanted to.

RAIRS’ CARL NASSIB ANNOUNC HE’S GAY, AN N.F.L. FIRST

” Around the same time, the Human Rights Campaign clared unequivolly that “Beg gay is not a choice, ” and to claim that is “giv unwarranted crence to roundly disproven practic such as nversn or reparative therapy. ”People who challenge the Born This Way narrative are often st as homophobic, and their thkg is nsired backwardAs Jane Ward not Not Gay: Sex Between Straight Whe Men, what’s tertg about many of the claims is how transparent their speakers are wh their polil motivatns.